Sadly, No!

When aliens from the future study why humanity destroyed itself, I think this will a key historical e-document:

The reviews only grew more savage when Gore crossed over to the Senate Environment and Public Works Committee in the afternoon for a second hearing. “You’ve been so extreme in some of your expressions that you’re losing some of your own people,” announced Sen. James Inhofe (Okla.), the committee’s ranking Republican and the man who has called man-made global warming “the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people.”

Inhofe informed Gore that scientists are “radically at odds with your claims.” Displaying a photograph of icicles in Buffalo, Inhofe demanded: “How come you guys never seem to notice it when it gets cold? . . . Where is global warming when you really need it?”

And that’s about it, folks. Because it’s cold in Buffalo during the winter, global warming can’t be real.

There are times when I think we just deserve to die off. This is one of them.

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The Gathering of Eagles answers our note from the National Park Service’s official spokeman with one from Betty The Happy Park Service Volunteer:

National Park Service Volunteers Say Thanks
March 21st, 2007 | Category: Guest Authors

Dear Veterans, Family and Friends,

We won. I am so proud of our Veterans, Active Duty Forces and Supporters, for their restraint, demeanor, and patience in the face of the goofs who showed up to demonstrate on Saturday.

My observations will be short. You were trickling in at 0700 that morning when I arrived, gathering in full force all day long in the cold and windy weather, and were still there at 1900 when I left.

You came to stand down at the Wall with we Volunteers in quiet dignity, but on guard.

The adversaries were across Henry Bacon Drive aiming their blaring loudspeakers our way, playing inappropriate rock, latin and hiphop music over our Memorials and I’m sure it was wafting across the Potomac to Arlington National Cemetery.

We were also supplemented by the Park Police and the Washington Metro Police.

The Gathering of Eagles were posted on a very windy knoll at the East End of the Wall, where they had surrounded themselves with hundreds of American flags flying briskly in the breeze. No loud music, no complaining about the environment. Just there to defend the Wall.

I am so very grateful for your presence and please remember that we National Park Service Volunteers – the ‘yellow hats’ – take it very seriously to ensure that respect and honor are most present at your sanctuary.

I’m pleased to serve you.

Best wishes,
Betty

We didn’t realize we were up against such cleverness.

Now they can say that the National Park Service has released an ‘unofficial statement’ that anti-war people are goofs and adversaries, against whom the Gathering of Eagles ‘won.’

It’s apparently time to email Bill Line again, because the Park Service might have something to say about their name being used in such a way, especially to promote the following sentiments — the calling of US servicemen ‘traitors,’ and the suggestion that they should be prosecuted for demonstrating on the wrong side:

We’ve also full-screen-captured these pages from the official GoE photo gallery because of the tendency for things to mysteriously change over there. Just sayin’.

[Oh My God. Look at this wingnut. He’s so round. He’s probably one of those wingnut welfare guys. He’s just so… out there! So lazy, so pathetic. Gross. It’s like, wow.]

I am a wingnut and I do lie
With Cheetos and a slice of pie
When Dear Leader walks in with stupid on his face
and war all over teh place

I get sprung and I squawk
cuz I’m teh chickenhawk
Deep in the flightsuit he’s wearin’
I’m wankin’ while I’m starin’

Oh Dear Leader I wanna get wit’cha
safe from war-time action
Liberals make fun of me
But Bush’s codpiece makes me so horny

Oh, pasty with double chins
from basement & cubicle livin’
But I put teh ‘mac’ in macho
I’m teh head recliner honcho

MC Doh-E Pantload with homie, Wheeze-L

I’m tired of liberal fascists
Wit’ their Adolf ‘staches
Ask this ‘Freedom Pundit’ anything
‘Liberals are Nazis’: zing!

So, hey, fellas, fellas
Can you help me write my book?
I’m bleggin, I’m bleggin
Help a wingnut out
I’m teh laziest hack

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Seb says that they’re whacking at the server again. If we go down for awhile, we’ll be back up as soon as possible, with kittens and ice cream for everyone!1

Seb adds: Seb should have been clearer in one of his many late-night cryptic emails –> What Seb said was that the latest post was sure to bring about some more of that, uh, special attention our way.

Gavin adds: You know, this is becoming a dysfunctional relationship: If they don’t attack us, I feel they don’t love us anymore.

So how many people were there, really, at the Gathering of Eagles demonstration? We don’t know, but here’s the final word on that ‘National Park Service’ figure of 30,000 pro-war demonstrators, now ubiquitous on the Web and in the right-leaning media.

Michelle Malkin wrote on Saturday that the figure came directly from the Gathering of Eagles:

***Update: Kit at Gathering of Eagles reports on the National Park Service estimate of the GoE turnout: 30,000 strong. The silent majority no more.***

Then at some point, the attribution changed:

***Update: Heidi at Gathering of Eagles reports on the National Park Service estimate of the GoE turnout: 30,000 strong. The silent majority no more.***

Here’s what the Gathering of Eagles site now says — that text, as well, has been changed* since Sunday evening, when it only read, ‘the first unofficial estimate’ (emphasis ours):

2) the first unofficial NPS estimate of the Eagle turn-out today:

30,000!

That figure may be adjusted upward as more figure are tallied during the week.

Now here’s what the National Park Service has to say about it:

Dear Mr. […]:

I am the spokesperson for the National Park Service in Washington, D.C. I never issued any statement of any kind about anything related to this past weekend’s events, let alone anything about crowd size. In fact, I was never asked that question by anyone.

Anyone who gives any crowd size number or figure for this past weekend is making the figure up and does not have any authorization whatsoever to attribute those figures to the National Park Service. Since I never issued any such statement nor was ever the question raised in the first place, it is impossible to attribute any figures to the National Park Service for this past weekend’s events.

Lastly, Congress prohibits the National Park Service from giving or providing any crowd estimate for any permitted event on the National Mall.

I hope this is of help and clarification for you.

Bill Line
Communications & Tourism Officer
National Park Service
National Capital Region
1100 Ohio Drive, SW
Washington, D.C. 20242

Looks like someone has some ‘splaining to do.

One more thing: Below is the attendance petition circulated widely on the Internet by the Gathering of Eagles organizers, in order to gauge the number of demonstrators:

To: All Interested Parties

We, the undersigned, pledge to attend the March 17th Gathering of Eagles in Washington, D.C. We intend to stand guard at our nation’s sacred memorials to honor the memory of our troops who died in service of our great country. We promise to recognize and reflect on the sacrifice of our fallen heroes.

Please sign here only IF you WILL be in attendance at the Vietnam War Memorial on March 17th. We are trying to obtain an accurate total so we know how many to expect. There is another petition at: http://www.petitiononline.com/GOE317/petition.html – please sign there if you will be with us IN SPIRIT.

Our troops, current and prior, are true heroes and we will honor each and every one of them by standing side by side, heads held high, defending the sanctity of our nation’s monuments to veterans. Our sacred pledge is that our actions will honor those heroes and that we will respect their service and their sacrifice.

I WILL be at the Gathering of Eagles on March 17th in Washington, DC.

Sincerely,

The Undersigned

1826 Total Signatures

One would have to say that 1,826 doesn’t seem very close at all to the figure the right-wing noisemakers have been cheering about.

Then again, another petition for people who pledged to ‘be there in spirit’ has 4155 signatures, so maybe there was also a big pro-war demonstration in Second Life or something.

* The Gathering of Eagles site has changed again, and once again reads ‘the first unofficial estimate,’ leaving out the part about the National Park Service.

We were fooled for a second, thinking we’d made a mistake. But we’ve been copying and pasting that passage directly from their page each time, here and at FDL, and each time it says something different.

Rather than try to figure out what’s going on over there, with all the changing-things-back-and-forth, we’re content to advance an alternative hypothesis: If they never claimed such a thing, then Malkin must have invented the story about the National Park Service and falsely attributed it to a Kit, and then a Heidi, at Gathering of Eagles.

Perhaps they’d like to figure that out amongst themselves. Malkin doesn’t give in easily to being the one left holding the bag.

Above: Powered by eine Rasse und ein Traum.

Iraq Steps Up Anti-Israel Boycotts

• Whose crazy idea was it to liberate the Iraqi mongrel sand niggers?

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.

Michelle Malkin is totally not letting Drudge sign her yearbook.

Drudge disses Hot Air
posted at 3:08 pm on March 19, 2007 by Michelle

A Hot Air commenter mentioned this last week: It seems Matt Drudge–Internet pioneer, New Media godfather, and tech entrepreneur–has a grudge against little ol’ Hot Air. He made some bizarre, disparaging remarks attacking this site and me on his radio show last weekend.

Just ugh. The things I want to say right now. But we’ve got an FCC. The things I want to say. Maybe we’ll do, uh, uh, a commentary on the Internet like Michelle Malkin. Maybe I’ll stand in front of like a blue screen and hold a banana and start talking into the Internets. (Sneering tone) ‘This is Matt Drudge reporting on Hot Air.’ Agggh. You know. It’s ridiculous. Looks like, you know, Captain Kangaroo time, Michelle. Get real.

“Get real?� Got whine?

Girl, maybe you ought to stop dissing his boyfriend:

The CPAC I saw
By Michelle Malkin · March 04, 2007 11:15 AM

[…]

Enter Ann Coulter.

Her “faggot” joke was not just a distraction from all the good that was highlighted and represented at the conference. It was the equivalent of a rhetorical fragging–an intentionally-tossed verbal grenade that exploded in her own fellow ideological soldiers’ tent.

Above: Ooo, she didn’t!

With a single word, Coulter sullied the hard work of hundreds of CPAC participants and exhibitors and tarred the collective reputation of thousands of CPAC attendees. At a reception for college students held by the Young America’s Foundation, I lambasted the substitution of stupid slurs for persuasion– be it “faggot” from a conservative or “gook” from a liberal–and urged the young people there to conduct themselves at all times with dignity in their ideological battles on and off campus.

I made something else explicitly clear: Not all of us treat the communication of conservative ideals and ideas as 24/7 performance art. You can and should use humor to convey your message. You can enlighten and entertain–without becoming a tired old schtick. You can joke without becoming the joke.

Well, I guess we’ll the judges of that. But indeed, as the Eve Harrington of Conservative Media, Michelle has no patience for a Margo Channing blocking the escalator. There can be only one.

Had enough yet, Drudge? Or would you like double-M to freshen that snap for you?

We at Hot Air certainly don’t have the resources to look like the slicksters at CNN or the dinosaur networks. We don’t have multi-million dollar sets, graphics, and wardrobes like Katie Couric. We put substance first over bells and whistles. (You would think someone with a website design circa 1980 might appreciate our priorities.) That said, folks in the broadcast industry have had nice words about our production values and I’m proud of what our team has accomplished in less than a year. In fact, we’ve had broadcast network engineers and producers ask us how we do it.

Above: How, I say how, do they do it?

Above: Shaved his mustache when someone pointed out his resemblance to Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein

Happy Independence Day Iraq

• I’ll be very surprised if there is not some grand square in Baghdad that is named after President Bush.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.

As you might’ve read last week, while I was working doubles and helping some friends have a party time at their wedding, some of the deplorable conditions at Walter Reed Hospital were likely caused by a politically motivated push to privatize maintence services and shower tax dollars on a well-connected company:

IAP is owned by Cerberus Capital Management LP, an asset-management firm chaired by former Treasury secretary John W. Snow. The company is headed by two former high-ranking executives of KBR, [a Halliburton subsidiary]. Al Neffgen, IAP’s chief executive, was chief operating officer for a KBR division before joining IAP in 2004. IAP’s president, Dave Swindle, is a former KBR vice president.

That paragraph pretty much sums up everything wrong about the last six years: A bunch of people’s lives got worse because the Bush adminstration wanted to make some of their rich friends even richer. And it’s not like the nation’s journalists have suddenly become better, more succinct writers; you see paragraphs like that all the time. (The one about shipping cash by the ton to Iraq might be the definitive example of the genre.) That’s probably why The Left gets so frustrated that he begins to exhibit the symptoms of Bush Derangement Syndrome. It’s maddening when someone refuses to see a problem that’s so readily apparent and easily explained, and it’s even more irritating when people get mad at you for pointing out those obvious mistakes.

It’s sort of like when you see a stranger walking down the street with her skirt tucked into the back of her pantyhose or a long strip of toilet paper trailing from the bottom of his shoe, and you sidle up to them and let them know, but they get embarrassed and yell at you as if you’ve played some sort of dirty trick on them.

All you can do is shake your head as they walk away, looking ridiculous, and say to yourself, “I was only trying to help.” And, if you’re anything like me, you’re calling your friend when you get back to work and saying, “You’ll never believe what this douchebag said to me at lunch…”

Blogs 4 Bush 1z teh shizzle:

Progressive morality is inhuman, but more importantly it is also anti-God. The left lives in a pantheistic world where God, if he exists at all, is a mere affirmer of whatever any particular progressive wants to do.

Whereas Mark’s God, the One True God, is pro-war, pro-death penalty and encourages people to stock up on automatic weapons.

The leftwing God makes no demands on his people to change but he does, it seems, demand they set about changing everyone else.

Whereas Mark’s God tells Bush to stay the course and force the Iraqis to become pro-Amurcan flag-wavers.

Never underestimate the craving of people for affirmation – people want to know that they are good and decent and do the right thing, and some people will fall for just about anything which tells them as much.

Even books filled with talking snakes, arks that can fit two of every single animal in the world on them and men who can part the entire Red Sea just by waving their hands around.

The primary motivation of a progressive is to not have to change to accomodate anyone (certainly not God) and to have his or her choices ratified with approval by society as a whole.

You know, I don’t honestly give a shit whether society approves of my personal decisions- indeed, my creepy fantasies involving lesbian midget strippers and potted plants are something I definitely don’t want in the public eye. My only argument is that it’s really none of society’s business what I do, as long as I keep it in my own damn house.

The contrast between this and what we call traditional morality cannot be more stark. As a sinner, I sometimes crave the applause of the crowd – but in my more rational moments, I know that the only person I have to please, and want to please, is God. If Caucus of Corruption sells a million copies and makes me fabuloulsy rich and famous, but it displeases God, then I will have failed utterly – if it sells only one copy and winds up ruining my job and causing me to lose all I have, but it pleases God, then I will have a fabulous success.

Then Mark, let me be the first to wish you a fabulous success.

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