Sadly, No!

I totally agree in conclusion if most definitely not in reasoning with these wacko, batshit, evangelical Christian crackpots folks who:

…say the federal Real ID Act, which will standardize state drivers licenses and link them to corresponding national ID numbers by 2009, represents the “mark of the beast,” the devilish number 666 that is attached to the godless.

The nearly 2,000-year-old passage is referenced along with the prophetic locusts, plagues, oceans of blood and rivers of fire found in the Bible. Soon after, according to scripture, the antichrist takes control of the world and Jesus Christ returns.

In short, new national ID numbers could spell the beginning of the end, some Christians believe.

“This is getting treacherously close to prophecy in the scripture,” said Irvin Baxter Jr., founder and president of Endtime Ministries in Dallas.

[…]

“We could be tracked by machines everywhere we go,” said Guest, referring to provisions that require “machine-readable” technology in the ID cards. “This could signal the death of individual freedoms and rights.”

But Guest, who has recruited legislators from 35 other states to introduce legislation opting out of the Real ID Act, said he has received hundreds of phone calls, e-mails and letters from constituents who are more fearful about Biblical prophecies coming true if the program goes unchecked.

‘Tis true: Such laws are satanic. Scary. Creepy. A burden for the states to pay for and maintain, as the article goes on to say. And just waiting there for a Big Brother/Dear Leader to exploit — BLARGH!!! Unter glieben glauben globen!!! Nevermind all that! Seems. . .to mesmerize. . .can’t avoid their eyes. Hicks, Hicks, Hicks! The number of the beast — six six six — is the one for you and me!!! Cats and dogs, living together! Bring on the ID Card! Abortions for everyone! Child sacrifice! Buying vodka with food stamps! Hell, let’s shit on Ol’ Glory! Take it away, Eddie!!!

Gavin adds: Dammit Mencken, every time I send my c.v. out for a graphics job, you do a post with poop in it, titled something like ‘Poopy Ha Ha Satan Flag Poop.’

I’m going to come live at your house, and let’s see how you like it then. Singing along to my Rezillos MP3s at 3AM…

Hello again (for the 10 people or so who saw the new site with a single post) and welcome, for you are now accessing the new site. Ooh, exciting. It can only mean one thing: business.

Or try this.

But that’s what Michelle Malkin is serving. Umm, thanks, but no thanks.

Above: Where Michelle would prefer to watch
liberals drop their kids off at the pool.

Dear lord, what is it with these perverted reactionaries? First there was Dan Riehl’s ‘Hot For Teacher’ fetish, and now Michelle Malkin ‘Enema-tizes the We-shat-on’, bakes Schiesse-Crispy Treats, brews up a pot of s.h.i. tea, and otherwise indulges her scat fetish:

“Walden Pond, Fifth Avenue style”
Plus: Defecating on an American flag

A “guilty liberal” family tries to live a “no impact” lifestyle in New York City.

The New York Times reporter, Pamela Green(!), chronicles the family in “The Year Without Toilet Paper.”

[…]

So, they refuse to wipe their two-year-old’s bottom and have sworn off paper to save the trees.

While we’re on the subject of liberal crap: […]

[…]Perhaps the most disturbing scene of the afternoon, however, involved the man who pulled down his pants in front of women and children and defecated on a burning U.S. flag. This disgusting act actually elicited cheers from some members of the crowd, but we hope that the emotion it produces in the community is one of revulsion…

A few fringe actors? Not.

Sure, Michelle, we liberals are all a bunch of GG Allins! But it seems you’re enthralled by our act a little too much if you know what I mean (and I think you do).

Above (l-r): Present hosting solution which sucks and blows up and is bad; New servers gleam sparkle hooray!

We’ll be relocating to a new host tomorrow, with no more of that 503-error folderol that’s been afflicting things so badly lately. (Besides the DDoS unpleasantness, our host has been throttling our traffic — apparently because the dozens and dozens of visits per hour have been overwhelming their array of 1200 baud modems.)

There are also other changes going on, some of which y’all might be very happy with. But I ought to get out of here before Seb pulls the handle and the site and archives, et cetera, start lumbering off like the building at the beginning of that Monty Python movie.

3xc3|si0r!

Seb adds:  Well, everyone might want to hold on to their tuques as it looks like the move will be delayed until the “RegisterFly Debacle” has been resolved or until we manage to get the domain moved to a new registrar or until we can log into our RF account and update the DNS servers. We blame Gary Ruppert.

See if you can spot the irony here:

WASHINGTON – A sharply divided House voted Friday to order President Bush to bring combat troops home from Iraq next year, but the president reiterated his vow to veto the bill, saying the House had “abdicated its responsibility.â€?

Bush appeared at the White House alongside veterans and family members of troops to accuse Democrats of staging nothing more than “political theater” that delays the delivery of resources to soldiers fighting in Iraq. If the spending bill is not approved and signed into law by April 15, Bush said troops and their families “will face significant disruptions.â€?

So, Bush uses vets and military families as political props and then accuses his opponents of engaging in political theatre. The mind, she be a-reelin’.

What a bloody knob.

WTF:

Retreat and Butter
Are Democrats in the House voting for farm subsidies or withdrawal from Iraq?

[snip]

Altogether the House Democratic leadership has come up with more than $20 billion in new spending, much of it wasteful subsidies to agriculture or pork barrel projects aimed at individual members of Congress.

Hey, Fred’s been reading Porkbusters! Wah wah and blah blah blah about the pork, but the next part proves that Hiatt has swallowed Perfesser Corncob’s mancob:

At the tail of all of this logrolling and political bribery lies this stinger: Representatives who support the bill — for whatever reason — will be voting to require that all U.S. combat troops leave Iraq by August 2008, regardless of what happens during the next 17 months or whether U.S. commanders believe a pullout at that moment protects or endangers U.S. national security, not to mention the thousands of American trainers and Special Forces troops who would remain behind.

Love that part between the dashes. See, all the supporters of the bill have been bribed, implies Fred. And the ‘why won’t they wait and see??’ part. Precious. Democrats won’t agree to an unlimited amount of Friedman Units = Munich, appeasement, Hitler. And how in fuck could a pullout endanger national security? What part of Iraq is American soil?

The Democrats claim to have a mandate from voters to reverse the Bush administration’s policy in Iraq.

Is there not an implied ‘which I take leave to doubt’ in the tone of that sentence? For Fred, see, it’s impossible that the American people would not love the Iraq Crusade as much as he does.

Yet the leadership is ready to piece together the votes necessary to force a fateful turn in the war by using tactics usually dedicated to highway bills or the Army Corps of Engineers budget.

Yes, tactics like “legislation”!

Read the rest of this entry »

Above: ‘Prove the White House sabotaged ongoing investigations! I dare ya! I double dare ya!’

‘Unnecessary Scandal’

• If I take the line that Alberto Gonzales is merely incompetent rather than a serial liar, and that Republicans’ voter fraud investigations target the dead rather than live minorities, it’s easier for me to argue that Democrats are only using the AG ‘scandal’ to criminalize honest conservative politics.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.

(Ooh yeah! All right!)

Were Pammin’…
I wanna Pam it with you.
Were Pammin’, Pammin’…
And I hope you like Pammin’, too.

‘Cos everyday we pay the price with a little sacrifice,
Pammin’ ’til the Pam is through.

Above: The cruel rays of dawn

Bonus yikes: The following Pam Atlas moment is submitted without comment:
 

Hooters:Tah-Tahrrific

Hooha to Hooters! Thanks fellas for standing up. I’ve never dined there but I sure will now. hat tip TRK

Hooters To Open Restaurants In Israel

Hooters, the restaurant chain known for its tasty wings and scantily clad servers, is heading to Israel. Atlanta-based Hooters of America Inc. said in a statement that it has reached a franchise deal with Ilana and Ofer Ahiraz to open the first Hooters restaurant this year in Israel, with several more locations in Israel to follow.

Update: Oh, who am I kidding.

So next thing, Ofer Ahiraz gets on the phone and says, “No, no! You dolts! I said I wanted to open the first Hooters where the boobs are real…”

Thankew, try the soup.

Above: Who’s a Breck Girl? (photo not altered by Sadly, No!)

‘Banal Outrage’

• There’s something frankly creepy about the explosion we now call the Blogosphere, but a deceptively edited clip on YouTube achieves deep meaning and resona– Hahahaha! Lookit his hair! He just keeps combing it!

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.

Just sayin’.

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