Those rassin’-frass, frick-a-frack, flap-jabbin’… Ooooh! (The burn, the burn!)
http://www.internetrumormill.com/sadlyyes.html
[more here in a bit. honestly though, how dare they assume we’re not gay? also, you have to admit: they’re getting better at the inflammatory Nat’l Lampoon humor-thing.]
Huffing mustache guy Frank Salvato demonstrates the basic technique in his latest editorial at The Rant.
Vietnam War protest hero John Kerry recently called on the White House to release ?in their entirety? all of Supreme Court nominee John Roberts? records as they pertain to his public service. “We cannot do our duty if either Judge Roberts or the Bush administration hides elements of his professional record,” Kerry said.
And now watch the turnaround…
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Thready McThreadington…
Well, S.Z. held voting for the Low-Rent Ultimate Wingnut Contest today, and alas, it looks like Debbie Daniel will soon be kicked off the island.
While Debbie’s latest column is admittedly lackluster, we should remember that in her prime, Debbie could wingnut with the best of ’em. In honor of her fine contributions to wingnuttery over the last couple of years, here is a Debbie Daniel career retrospective.
Let’s go back to where it all began and read Debbie’s first column for GOPUSA:
I’ve been listening to both sides of this immigration issue and I’ve come to the conclusion that the only way to handle this problem is to line up every willing and able American, arm in arm, across our entire border and shoot to kill.
And with that unhinged expression of homicidal rage, a wingnut legend was born.
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From probably a dozen places all at once (Chron Watch, American Daily, the Rant, People Pa-whatsis, and other low-rent wingsheets all tend to publish the same twenty columnists), Lee Ellis lays it down.
Lee Ellis, cranky old guy, used to work for CBS
The March of the Left VS the March of the Penguins,
By Lee Ellis
In the comments, Marie Jon’ writes:
You miserable bunch of Anti American low life. You sit and complain and joke! I have Sadly No respect for you or your bankrupt socialistic party of losers who are near seditious in behavior and words. Now you have just heard the WORD! ” The world loves it’s own.” There is no spirit here in this bog other than sheer contempt for God and the USA!
Now c’mon, Marie- we enjoyed your spirited parody earlier today, and we were starting to think that you had a sense of humor. In fact, we were so impressed by your use of foul language, that we almost mistook you for one of our own!
C’mere, give us a hug, eh? Can we get a hug?
Pastor Swank’s been awfully busy the last coupla days. For your reading enjoyment, here’s a summary:
Column #1: DON’T ADD YOGA TO CHRISTIAN PRAYERS
If yoga were a part of Christian prayer life, the Bible would have instructed Christians in yoga. Therefore, taking yoga into a so-called Christian prayer is nonsense and may be worse. It could open the spirit to demonic spirits.
So not only does yoga have the power to obliterate your groin, but it can lead to demonic possession too. And if you don’t believe it, take a look at this guy:
Added by Jeff Seb: We suspect this is the “closes” Marie Jon’? will ever get to making a funny.
[Update of a previous update — our picture-switching trick on Marie’s page has now been foiled. Foiled, I say!]
Without using Google, who can guess what, or who, is being discussed here:
Though [they] provide amusement for a few minutes, their repertoire is severely limited. And aside from the activity of […] in their fecally-laced […], [they] spend most of their time just standing around.
Richard Perle and David Frum are not the answer!
The Virgin Ben takes a decidedly fascist turn in his latest column. If he keeps it up, I’m gonna start calling him the TaliBen:
The American Civil Liberties Union focuses far more on preventing effective law enforcement than on protecting American lives. Its incessant complaints about the treatment of Guantanamo Bay detainees has undermined the moral authority of the American military, despite the fact that treatment has been more than adequate under the circumstances. Its obsession with “exposing” as many Abu Ghraib images as possible is designed as a direct attack on American soldiers abroad […] But civil libertarian absolutists will continue to assault America’s safety in favor of American “liberties.” Myopic civil libertarians ignore the simple fact that effective law enforcement is the best way to promote civil liberties.
And according to Ben, effective law enforcement entails ignoring law enforcement guidelines. Let’s recall what he said about Abu Ghraib last year (via TBogg, emphasis added):
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