Sadly, No!

AgapePress reports:

Intelligent Design Proponent Optimistic About Current Worldview Shift

By Jim Brown
August 23, 2005

(AgapePress) – The head of a biblical creationism museum sees a major worldview shift on the academic level from neo-Darwinism to intelligent design.

If by “academic,” you mean “a handful of creationist cranks,” sure.

After all, just because one crazy cardiologist vouches for the mystical healing powers of sacred tap water, that doesn’t mean the medical establishment is going to start prescribing Celestial Drops for canker sores.
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But we’re pretty sure that the best answer to a rather uninteresting and tired (and, frankly, quite boring) blog post isn’t to write something that is even less interesting, even more tired, and astoundingly managed to be more boring and inaccurate to boot. Then again, we ain’t David “Axis of Evil” Frum’s wife:

TO: [email protected]
FROM: [email protected]
RE: Recent blog

The Almighty has asked me to send a reply on His behalf regarding your recent blog [sic] on the Huffington Post. […]

For example, you suggested that the Almighty would be angry at the President for “the bloodied souls of the women and children he [Bush] killed in Iraq.” Actually, up here we have an excellent view of the battlefield.

Sadly, No!:

Pope John Paul, in his first public comment on the outbreak of hostilities in Iraq, said on Saturday that the war threatens the whole of humanity, and that weapons could never solve mankind’s problems.

“When war, like the one now in Iraq, threatens the fate of humanity, it is even more urgent for us to proclaim, with a firm and decisive voice, that only peace is the way of building a more just and caring society,” he said.

The Pope, in a speech to employees of Catholic television station Telepace, added: “Violence and weapons can never resolve the problems of man.”

The Pope led the Vatican in a diplomatic campaign to avert war, putting the Holy See on a collision course with Washington and its backers in the Iraq campaign.

See you in hell.

Edit: Fixed link and added this:

We hate sending hits to The Poor Man because he was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when he met No, and five months later on he has the world at his feet, and never comes and says hello.

Rrowrr! Hsfptht! Would you like us to…”

No no, evil cat minion. We’re all grown-ups here.

But the old Poor Man, despite pinning you to the sofa and forcing you to look at his baby pictures from time to time, is a brilliant polemicist and quite often an analyst second only to Billmon and Digby — next to whom second place is a golden and bejeweled laurel wreath. (We’d like to point out, just this one time, that we CAN do that sort of thing here, but are too lazy and slovenly, and often drunk, to do it frequently or with any aplomb. Plus, no one links or comments when we do, because this place is basically a zoo filled with howling baboons — not a bad thing).

Anyway, back to the brilliantine (in the strict-French, not the ‘pomade’ sense) dawn-ray that is the Poor Man’s essay today. Go check this one out.

Yes, right? If we each had one of these, we could give each other ‘fellowships’ and ‘jobs,’ and endow musical swappy-chairs with each other’s names. Directorships, trusteeships. It’s exactly how it’s done.

Let’s start with an award.
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Here’s an excerpt from WorldNetDaily’s new star columnist, Erik Rush:

Due to a variety of factors (including national security), issues surrounding the U.S.-Mexico border have been in the forefront of discussion for many months. The precise number of Mexicans entering the U.S. illegally each year is impossible to accurately determine, but estimates average out to about 1 million. The motivation for the majority of illegal immigrants from Mexico is, as we are all aware by now, primarily economic.

So, I say: Annex Mexico. Handsome bribes to Vicente Fox and his underlings would no doubt bring them around to thinking it an excellent idea.

That’s goddamn genius. I don’t know why we haven’t thought of it before. Well sure, it’d leave us in charge of a country with a vastly weaker currency and higher poverty rate at a time when we’re running large structural deficits. Not to mention the fact that it’d give every country in the hemisphere incentive to send us boatloads of immigrants in hopes that we’d bribe them to stop. Plus, it’d be unlikely that the Mexicans, who are still pissed that we stole California from them (after they stole it from the Native Americans), would welcome us with open arms.

OK, now that I think about it, it’s not such a genius idea. In fact, it’s a pretty goddamn shitty idea. Thankfully, Erik addresses some of my concerns later in the piece:
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After hearing that Pat Robertson had called for Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez’s assassination, my first thought was, “Who in their right mind is wingnutty enough to justify this?”

Happily, Pastor Swank stepped right up to the plate:

Robertson believes that Chavez is a “terrific danger” to America, according to the AP. If that is reality, then I personally thank Robertson for warning the nation. I grant Robertson then the motive of wanting to put on guard a free country. That surely is a sterling motive from which to make a remark.

Please. The fucker’s portfolio probably took a hit after Chavez threatened to nationalize the country’s oil fields. You may remember Pat’s similarly principled defense of war criminal Charles Taylor, who gave one of Robertson’s companies a sweetheart deal to mine for gold in Liberia.
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New from talk-radio bully Mark Williams (see Crooks & Liars link below) and the rest of the folks at the Republican Russo, Marsh, and Rogers PR firm the non-partisan Move America Forward foundation, who brought you the Iraqi Truth Tour, and are now rolling out the anti-Sheehan ‘You Don’t Speak for Me, Cindy!’ media juggernaut:

CaseysKids.org

Casey Sheehan, 1979-2004

That’s right, Casey…the Friendly Dog is heading a new foundation to help our troops help Iraqi kids.

Casey the Dog

Yeah, you think I’m kidding, like this is the Onion or something. They wouldn’t stoop that low, would they? You know, it’s not often that I allow myself a great, bellowing, purgative Sadly, No! (Brad risks the rattling dishware and startled cats far more often). But excuse me while I…
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I’d hoped that when Ms. Internment USA went on vacation, she’d turn her blog over to people who’d be slightly less crazy and maybe even somewhat readable. (OK, so those were pretty high expectations- I woulda settled for functionally literate.) Alas, ’twas not to be:

Joe Scarborough is on fire tonight. He is angry at Chuck Hagel for his Vietnam and related remarks and accused him of selling out the troops to gain favor from those in the MSM.

I wonder if these people realize how much they sound like twelfth-rate comic book writers.

Hey, maybe if I sold out the troops more often, I’d gain favor with the Dread MSM and they’d book me on far-left programs like Hard Ball and Hannity & Colmes.

UPDATE: The ever-shrewd Norb writes:

It sounds better if you read the prose like Marv Albert is announcing it:

“Joe Scarborough. IS. ON. FIRE. TONIGHT. He is ANGRY at Chuck Hagel for his VIETnam andrelatedremarks… and ACCUSED him of sellingoutthetroops! To gain favor from those in the MSM! Delivers the facial! YES!”

And our very own Yosef adds:

“And let me bite your ASS onemoretime!”

Heh. (Hey, I’m getting the hang of this “blog like a conservative” thingee!)

This video, via Crooks & Liars, is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in my entire life. You simply cannot have a discussion with people who are utterly unreasonable and refuse to confront reality.

It’s Monday. You’ve had a nice, relaxing weekend, but now you’re stuck at work. Your office’s A.C. just broke down and you’ve lost two pounds in the last hour just from sweating in your cubicle. Someone left a wheel of cheese in their desk over the weekend, and the whole place reeks of rancid gorgonzola. Worst of all, your boss just got back from vacation and has decided to start deducting the cost of coffee filters from your weekly earnings.

You come home with a throbbing headache, and you try to relax by reading your favorite blogs. Because you’re stupid, you click on Sadly, No! and discover yet another post on Renew America.

“Oh no, not again!” you say. “Pleasepleaseplease don’t write about another stupid Justin Darr column!”

You notice that Brad R. has decided to kick off his review with a column called “If Iraq is so bad, why aren’t we pulling out of Detroit?” You know you shouldn’t click below the fold, but your curiosity gets the better of you. Your worst nightmares are realized, as you discover that the column in question was written by none other than…
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