Sadly, No!

Oh man. So right now I’m watching this speech by Colonel Larry Wilkerson, Colin Powel’s former chief of staff at the State Department (via Kevin Drum). And boy, is he shrill. And when I say “shrill,” I mean “shuuuuuuuuuh-rrrrrrill.” Seriously, it’s like Spinal Tap designed his sound system and turned his shrillness dial up to “11.” Here he is talking about detainee abuse:

And I’ll finish just by bringing it down screechingly to the ground, and tell you that the detainee abuse issue is just such a concrete example of (the decision making process within the Bush administration) I’ve just described to you, that ten years from now or so- when it’s really, really put to the acid test, ironed out, and people have looked at it from every angle- we are going to be ashamed of what we allowed to happen. I don’t know how many people saw the Frontline documentary last night. Very well-done, I thought, but it didn’t get anywhere near the specifics that need to be shown, that need to come out, that need to say to the American people, “This is not us. This is not the way we do business in the world…”

I don’t think in our history we’ve ever had a Presidential involvement, a Secretarial involvement, a Vice-Presidential involvement, an Attorney General involvement in telling our troops that, essentially, carte blanche is the way you should feel. You should not have any qualms because this is a different kind of conflict… I understand the radical change in the nature of our enemy, but that doesn’t mean we make a radical change in the nature of America. But that’s what we did. And we did it in private. And we did it in such privacy that the Secretary of State had to open the door to my office one day… and he said, “Larry. Larry, get everything. Get all the paperwork. Get the ICRC (International Community of the Red Cross) reports. Get everything. I think this is going to be a real mess…

As former soldiers, we knew that you don’t have this kind of pervasive attitude out there unless you’ve condoned it. And whether you did it explicitly or not is irrelevant. If you did it at all… you’re in trouble. Because that slippery slope is truly slippery, and it will take years to reverse the situation.

It’s hard work.

HOUSTON — Fugitive Congressman Thomas Dale DeLay, wanted for money laundering charges, was shot and killed by police in an abandoned apartment building after a day-long chase, State Police said.

DeLay, 58, fled the scene when Houston patrolmen attempted to arrest him during a routine traffic stop, police said. Patrolman Al Barile, 38, said DeLay fled into a nearby field in Houston’s 4th Ward, eluding capture, until a dispatcher received a call from a local resident that the fugitive had entered an abandoned apartment complex.

A State Police unit was dispatched and opened fire when DeLay moved to reach for an officer’s weapon, a State Police spokesman said. One officer, Abraham Rodriguez, 32, was wounded by gunfire, and is reportedly in stable condition at Methodist Hospital. The officers involved were placed on administrative leave while detectives investigate.

[News tip courtesy The Klute, in comments.]

By bomputer bill bisn’t borking bight.

Beveryting Bi bype barts bith ba ‘B!’

BTF?

Banyway, Bi bade bus bis bew bogo.

Bar-bar! Bet it? It’s a pair of pants! Oh wait, it’s fixed.

Test, test. Hello. The quick brown fox jumped over ba bazy bog.

…Bodbammit!

You guys ever hear of Barbara Kralis?

Although she only posts articles at Renew America once every coupla months, her work is usually filled to the brim with grade-A hilarity. The best is when she re-prints sermons written by her crazy friend Archbishop Sheen (or as I call him, the Reverend Dracula):

Above: Archbishop Sheen says, “Bloooood, blooooood!”

OK, let’s see what wingnuttery’s dynamic duo are up to this week:
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This one is right up there with “Red Sox Win World Series”:

“Arrest Warrant Issued For Lawmaker DeLay.”

Just keep repeating it to yourself. Damn, that’s good stuff.

I can’t wait ’til The Smoking Gun posts his mugshots.

Surprise, surprise- WorldNetDaily is being retarded again:

Bigger than ABC, CBS, NBC?
WND ranked among top 750 websites

WorldNetDaily, the No. 1 independent news source on the Internet, was ranked yesterday as the 729th largest website in the world by Ranking.com, a public ratings site.

Guys? I hate to break it to you, but “Sadly, No!”

Ranking.com only collects data from people who use BrowserAccelerator, an Internet toolbar that ranks websites based solely on how many of its users visit them. As Ranking.com notes in their explanation of how rankings are generated, “the number of unique visitors listed by Ranking.com is not the actual number of unique visitors that went to your website, but rather the number of Browseraccelerator.com users that went to your site in the analysis period.” And how many users does BrowserAccelerator have? According to its website, about 165,000. On the other hand, Alexa, which is widely regarded as the best traffic rating site, has over 10 million toolbars installed worldwide. I shouldn’t need to tell you which site has the stronger sample size.
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WorldNetDaily’s got some exciting new products for sale! Hooray! Let’s check ’em out, starting with Conquest of Atzland, a documentary about how brown people are secretly trying to steal your land:

Conquest of Aztlan
By Glenn Spencer

Could Mexico retake the southwestern United States?

Hm. Let’s think about this.

Mexico spends roughly $6 billion per year on its military; the United States spends roughly $370 billion per year. The U.S. has 1.4 million active troops, while Mexico has about 190,000. The U.S. has a stockpile of more than 10,000 nuclear warheads; Mexico has a stockpile of, uhm, none.

So in response to your question “Could Mexico retake the southwestern United States?”, I’d have to say the answer is “Sadly, No!” Or as Yankees broadcasting legend John Sterling might say, “SADLY, NO! SUUUUUUUUUUH-ADLY, NOOOOO!!!”
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NewsMax has the scoop:

Bill O’Reilly Hires Bodyguards, May Retire

Jim Meyers, NewsMax.com
Tuesday, Oct. 18, 2005

“Now it’s so bad that I spend an enormous amount of money protecting myself against evil,” declares Fox News Channel’s Bill O’Reilly, who says his enemies have become so vicious that he’s mulling retiring from his top-rated TV show.

Note to O’Reilly’s evil enemies: you’re doing a great job. Please keep up the good work.
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Michelle Malkin must have a massive boner right now:

US security chief strives to expel all illegal immigrants

Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff said his department aims without exception to expel all those who enter the United States illegally.

They really won’t do this, obviously- Dubya’s Wall Street pals loves them some cheap Meskin labor- but ranting about brown people is a great way to fire up the unwashed wingnut masses.

Because no one should be fired for pointing out Dubya’s fucktardation. (Via Yglesias.)