Sadly, No!

First it was refusal to sign a blogger pledge of ethics that led some to conclude that “lefties” are bad people. Captain Paste grabs the bar and aims for the toilet (the kind that is fancy, which is to say, clear and blue like the sky):

So. I’m holding this fundraiser in order to afford the maintainence of this site while raising enough money for a down payment to move us into a bigger house by year’s end (we live in a rented duplex at the moment)—when what happens? My landlord knocks on the door, tells me he’s lost his job, and that he’s going to have to sell the property. […]

Still, this leaves us in quite a bind. Which got me to thinking: I wonder if Atrios and the rest of his progressive brethren (including such august champions of righteousness as Michael Berube, who recently shed his tweedy classroom demeanor to call me a “supercilious, ignorant, self-satisfied wanker”) will step up and help save this poor young family from ending up on the streets. After all, isn’t that what “progressivesâ€? do?

Leaving aside the fact that we had no idea that Denver, where Jeff lives, is just like Tuscany, there’s something truly impressive about Goldstein’s gambit. We expect that the next challenge will be to war protesters, arguing that they, and not the 101st Keyboard Brigadiers, should enroll in the army. Besides the obvious reasons, we’d hesitate giving our money to someone who thinks a $200/month dedicated server is needed to host a blog that averages 9,000 visitors a day. Good thing conservatives believe in the welfare state.

Bradrocket adds: Elendil, you’re bloody hilarious.

I’m gonna wait for official confirmation before I start celebrating over this. But lordy, lordy, I hope it’s true. It would make that asteroid-sized pony I talked about last week seem like an equine midget in comparison.

And if it is true… well, I just might have to start reexamining my lack of belief in God…

“Oh Fitzmas tree, oh Fitzmas tree… your branches bear indictments!”

Gavin adds: This is better than hook-hook-hookity-hook hookers? I dunno man, that’s a planet-sized pony with sparkly butterfly wings AND a unicorn horn, AND a little plastic brush to brush its mane with.

Above: Finster Baby wants an apple slice.

There, dammit, at long last.

Now excuse me, I need to go lay up a store of frilly baby bonnets via Google Images.

Hard to believe… but true! This is wow bad.

Bradrocket adds: O baby baby! This video is a cornucopia-o-comedy! Here are some fun excerpts:

Miniter: So let’s see: it’s 1946, and I need to understand German. Why don’t I hire some Nazis to interview some Jewish survivors, and explain postwar Germany by hiring Nazis. (The media) are hiring Ba’athist Sunnis. That’s why the coverage is so bad. They went from being embedded with U.S. troops and just reporting what they saw, and the effect was marvelous- it was accurate, it was up-to-date, it changed all the time. And now it’s formulaic and ideological- why? Because of their fixers, their intermediaries between their safe little lives in the Palestine and al-Rashed Hotels and the outside world, are former members of the regime.

Try telling Jill Carrol or Bob Woodruff that they live in a “safe little world,” asshole. But then again, being kidnapped or getting hit with shrapnel is nothing compared to the pain of being called a “cracker” in the Media War here at home, so I guess he has a point.
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Maldiciones!

Amanda against Zhdanovian hacks, left and right.

teh: “Dick Cheney has an approval rating on par with that of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.”

Chumpwad News Network.

Gelding A Bull Moose.

More Bashing of Cultural Commissars.

Oh, my.

Antiwisdom.

Gavin adds: 3Bulls infiltrates the GOP.

From: [email protected]
To: Everyone in the World
Subject: An apology

Dear 6 billion people everywhere on the planet,

Hi. We’ve never met before, but I’d just like to apologize on behalf of the entire white race for the embarrassing travesty that is FOX News pundit John Gibson. In particular, I am apologizing for remarks such as these:

Above: John “The Shame of White People Everywhere” Gibson

Do your duty. Make more babies. That’s a lesson drawn out of two interesting stories over the last couple of days.

First, a story yesterday that half of the kids in this country under five years old are minorities. By far, the greatest number are Hispanic. You know what that means? Twenty-five years and the majority of the population is Hispanic. Why is that? Well, Hispanics are having more kids than others. Notably, the ones Hispanics call “gabachos” — white people — are having fewer.

I know that after watching Gibson, you probably think that white people are all paranoid bed-wetters who fear anyone with a skin tone darker than a bundle of Clorox-soaked Q-Tips. I swear, this is not the case. Please, please, please do not hold the actions of John Gibson (or anyone appearing on the FOX News channel) against us. Thank you,

-Brad R.

Gavin adds:

Above: Scientific rendering of what the average
American will look like in the year 2031

Watch as the President does as they ask. How can such marvels be?

ditditdit…embargoed until Monday 8PM EST…abstract of Presidential speech…ditditdit

These guys are really lawyering the rules here. Has the Republican establishment not been making them feel special enough lately?

This’ll get him down to the mid-twenties:

President Bush plans to address the nation Monday night on the immigration debate, trying to build momentum for legislation that could provide millions of illegal immigrants a chance to become American citizens.

Karl Rove’s strategy for the past six years has been to rally the GOP base and give the finger to everyone else. Because of this, Bush has absolutely zero room to tack toward the center-right on issues like immigration. The wingnuts who voted for him expect results, and hearing anything less than “We’re gonna deport them taco-eaters back to Mexlamistan!!!” is tantamount to betrayal. And since the rest of the country already hates his bloody guts, G-Dubs’ semi-moderate stance on this issue will give him no boost in the polls. How much lower can Bush go than 29% approval? We’re about to find out.

Gavin adds: Remember this from Powerline a couple days ago?

After all the whooping at Powerline about how ‘leakers’ and reporters of ‘leaks’ should go to prison, I admire this new rhetorical trick of receiving advance warning of what the President is going to do, and then pretending to offer him advice (which he then seems to follow).

Smart thinking! TPM Muckraker could be all like:

Dear GOP,

All the friends who will have belonged to the party,
For the rude in letters put to death and plundered:
Property up for sale at fixed price; the great one annihilated.
If Cunningham sings, you’re going down motherfuckerz1!!!1!!!

—Roodstradamus

Oh dear God:

The Left and Our Enemies (But I Repeat Myself)
The most striking thing about Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s letter to President Bush – his “come to Mohammed� letter if you will – is how common the whole thing feels. In reading the Ahmadinejad letter – and I did take the time to read the whole thing – it quickly became apparent that there was very little to distinguish his words from those of any generic liberal activist. The letter – and the reaction to it by the American and global left – once again calls to mind a certain phrase that I have used in the past. There is only one war and there is only one enemy.

Before I take off my psychiatrist’s mask, maybe I could have some fun trying to diagnose one more wingnut of Canadian origin? How about it, Adam?

“Seig, heil! Er- I mean, sure, hoser!”

Bradrocket adds: That reminds me, I left my kaffiyeh at the dry cleaners’. Thanks, A-Yosh!

Above: What Brad turned into after reading Ahmadinejad’s letter.
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Sparing Moussaoui for the Wrong Reasons (Krauthammer’s version):

I agree with the trial’s result, though not with the jury’s reasoning; but then I am an expert in psychiatry, while they are Oprah-watching dullards. A military court would have done better.

Sparing Moussaoui for the Wrong Reasons (Krauthammer’s Neurotic Subconscious Version):

Shit! What a travesty! What if they use similar reasoning to spare the next one we catch? I’d better lay my expertise on thick to convince people that civilian courts are inappropriate for Dear Leader’s War on Terra.

Shorter concept invented by D^2 and perfected by B^3.

Retardo Montalban, who formerly practiced psychiatry, is an op-ed columnist for sadlyno.com