Sadly, No!

Although a bit late to the table, Pam serves herself a nice piece of blood libel:

Jihadis Behead Baby and Roast It

The enemy must be crushed. There is no other way. Tell Nancy Pelosi get her fat ass out of Syria and show the world (and our enemy in particular )a united front. We can debate our home all we want, but Bush is our President and last time I checked the Dhimmicrats haven’t rewritten the constiitution but we know that it’s just a matter of time. They hate document. Gets in the way of their statism.

Here is the latest bloodlust from the Religion of peices, savagery, beheadings, cliterectomies, ……

Iraq: Jihadists behead, roast Christian toddler
Jihadwatch hat tip Michael

Savagery in the name of obedience to the Almighty. From “We must not let this ancient Church slide into oblivion,” by Ed West in the Catholic Herald (thanks to all who sent this in):

“When they cook a dish in the Middle East, it is traditional to put the meat on top of the rice when they serve it. They kidnapped a woman’s baby in Baghdad, a toddler, and because the mother was unable to pay the ransom, they returned her child – beheaded, roasted and served on a mound of rice.” The infant’s crime was to be an Assyrian, but this story, reported by the Barnabus Fund, went unnoticed in the West, like so many other horrific accounts of Christian persecution in Iraq.

The Barnabas Fund is part of a para-church entity called the Institute for the Study of Islam and Christianity, founded by one Patrick Sookhdeo — another of those characters who keep appearing whose mission is to fan the flames of a global ‘War of Civilizations.’

And as we’ve seen, these narratives have a standard arc: Naturally, when you try to track down the ‘roasted baby’ story, you find yourself trailheaded in the Barnabas Fund’s news archives, where no such story is to be found.

Nevertheless, we totally hear that they use the blood of Christian infants to make their, you know, matzoh, or whatever the Muslim word for it is.

Update: Nope, there’s the item, only phrased somewhat differently. It’s tied to a plea for Christmas donations:

As we approach the season of Christmas, and the frenzied preparation and celebration that we anticipate, let us take time to pause and remember those Christians who will not be able to enjoy a peaceful time with their family and friends this Christmas…

[…]

…Christians like the thousands of frightened Iraqis who face Christmas in the context of escalating anti-Christian violence. In the most shocking report from Iraq we have received, a toddler was kidnapped in Baghdad in October 2006. The mother could not afford to pay the ransom, and so the kidnappers killed the child. They returned the body to the mother. The little child had been beheaded, roasted and was served on a mound of rice. In another incident a 14-year-old Christian boy was held down by his limbs and beheaded, or, as Iraqi Christians have described it, “crucifiedâ€?. His Muslim attackers called him a “dirty Christian sinnerâ€? and chanted “Allahu akbarâ€? (Allah is great).

Well, at least they didn’t kill Jesus (ahem-hem). The report, however, fails to note that the Muslims ransacked Whoville with smiles most unpleasant. Chanting “Allahu akbar,” they took every present! Pop guns and bicycles, roller skates, drums; checkerboards, tricycles, popcorn, and plums…

[Hanx! DiffBrad]

The good Dr. Edroso writes about the Internets phenomenon that is Glenn Harlan Reynolds:

[Reynolds] is a fairly doctrinaire conservative, with just a little socially-liberal trim added to differentiate him from the currently overstocked pool of Bill O’Reilly impersonators. The Perfesser tumbled early to right-wing market realities: for example, that while Rush Limbaugh’s politics was a factor, it was his self-presentation as a callous, self-satisfied douchebag that reminded suburban burghers enough of themselves that they made him a god. But the crafty Perfesser has aimed slightly higher: between newsy bits, he rattles on about high-end coffee-makers and hand dryers and cars, portraying himself very convincingly as exactly the sort of shopaholic dink he wants to draw to his site. They’re a demographic bonanza, after all — moneyed, acquisitive, and fundamentally insecure.

This persona requires another innovation on the Limbaugh formula: while Rush’s white dreamers of disenfranchisement relate well to authority, the Perfesser’s target auditors are a little more urbane and feckless. So while rightwing politics must stay in the mix — one cannot dispense entirely with authority, nor with the narrative of liberal betrayal, lest the audience drift away — it must be a cooler version of rightwing politics, less beefy-faced and sweaty, more accomodating to people who, in the depths of their soullessness, really just don’t give a shit about anything except their own personal comfort and primacy.

Basically, yeah.

Reynolds is the type of “libertarian” who defines liberty as “my right to own and use a buncha cool stuff.” All other liberties- such as, say, habeas corpus or the right not to be tortured- can be shrugged away with a “Hey, I’m against it if they do it to American citizens, and besides, the folks who are really to blame here are the ones who opposed torture from the start! Heh.”

I’m not sure if I’ve ever discussed my Grand Unifying Theory of the Ole Perfesser with y’all, but it basically amounts to this: the Perfesser’s goal is to doze through life by sedating himself with as many gadgets and technodoodads as possible until that glorious day arrives when he’s finally able to download his brain into a robot body and blast off into space (preferably with some of his robowhores in tow). And if any folks- whether they’re envirohippies who want to ban his gas-guzzling SUV or Muslamonazis who want to homicide-bomb his collection of iPods- try to interfere with the Perfesser’s right to be a lazy shit, then they must be… dealt with.

This burgeoning technodorkofascist movement doesn’t yet have an official slogan, but I think a good one would be: “iVolk, iReich, iPerfesser!”

MMMMM, tasty, tasty wheat gluten:

The U.S. Food and Drug Administration has identified the Chinese company that it said supplied the contaminated ingredient used in now-recalled pet foods that has sickened and killed thousands of animals nationwide.

The FDA ordered “detention without examination” of wheat gluten from Xuzhou Anying Biologic Technology Development Co. Ltd., which is based in Jiangsu province. Xuzhou Anying’s wheat gluten contains melamine, which is described as a poisonous or injurious substance and an unsafe food additive, according to an import notice issued Friday by the FDA.

We’ve been getting it from China because, you know, they cover our National Security State’s horrendous deficits, our corporations love their authoritarian government, and our consumers buy their cheap products (even, apparently, when they don’t want to! “I’m free to decide”, sang Milton Friedman — or was it the Cranberries?). Of course, we can’t refuse anything made or processed by slave and near-slave labor of extra-national origin. Because for one, to do so would go against economist-groupthink, always a real no-no and proof of one’s evil-commie nature; and for another, it would inspire the annihilating rage of whole future generations of Chinese. So, keep bringing on the poison!

First it got your dog. Then it got your cat. And now it may get ..you?:

Del Monte Foods has confirmed that the melamine-tainted wheat gluten used in several of its recalled pet food products was supplied as a “food grade� additive, raising the likelihood that contaminated wheat gluten might have entered the human food supply.

“Yes, it is food grade,� Del Monte spokesperson Melissa Murphy-Brown wrote in reply to an e-mail query. Del Monte issued a voluntary recall Saturday for several products under the Gravy Train, Jerky Treats, Pounce, Ol’ Roy, Dollar General and Happy Trails brands.

Wheat gluten is sold in both “food grade� and “feed grade� varieties. Either may be used in pet food, but only “food grade� gluten may be used in the manufacture of products meant for human consumption. Published reports have thus far focused on tainted pet food, but if the gluten in question entered the human food supply through a major food products supplier and processor, it could potentially contaminate thousands of products and hundreds of millions of units nationwide.

Read the rest of this entry »

OK, maybe he’s not as stupid as the Ole Perfesser or the Lesser Perfesser, but I’d still like for somebody to explain why Mickey Kaus ever had a of reputation as something other than a pathetic right-wing shill of subnormal intelligence? I mean, look at this bullshit (via Kevin Drum):

“We Are Hiring at $9.50 per hour”–sign in the window at the In & Out burger restaurant in Westwood, CA. That has to be more than they were paying a year ago. … I’m not saying you can raise a family on that (it works out to a bit less than $20,000/year). I’m saying tight labor markets–produced by growth and maybe a boost in immigration enforcement–eventually raise wages at the bottom, and we are starting to see that. Burger chain jobs set the de facto minimum wage, no? … 1:42 A.M.

And the hooker I paid for last night jacked her price up to 60 bucks, meaning all hookers across the country must be multikatrillionaire hookers by now, with spinning platinum rims on their Corvettes.

Good God, Mickey. This is lame even by your standards. You’ve stooped to using the same logic as James “Can’t be none global warmin’, i’s cold’re’n my mammy’s teet in Buf’lo” Inhofe. Can anyone explain why Slate is still paying this useless hack to write such absurdities? And also why the Washington Monthly feels obligated to pimp his “analysis” on their website?

It has been a long, long time since we last linked to Germany’s Brent Bozell, aka David’s Medienkritik. As is often the case when we stop reading some nut or other however, they don’t just disappear but in fact keep on going. Fortunately, other people are around to pick up the slack:

Behind Medienkritik’s assault on Spiegel and other German news outlets I can feel not just justified anger at provincial left-wing attitudes in European newsrooms and readerships but a defensiveness about Bush and neoconservatism in general that I think explains the whole Medienkritik project. Ray D scolds us journalists by saying “introspection and self-criticism are painful,� but a less introspective site than Medienkritik is hard to think of. Ray doesn’t seem to realize that his sloppy, half-accurate shotgun approach to “criticizing� the German media is itself a problem for trans-Atlantic relations because it fans the flames of anti-Europeanism in the States.

As Speak the Hungarian Rapper might say, business.

If you can read this, you’ve somehow landed at the new, new place. Not the old place that sucked. Not the new place that made the old place look like it wasn’t teh suck. The newer place. With very powerful gay hamsters.

We’re still getting things organized so don’t panic if there are some (party) quirks.

–The Management

Gavin adds: I believe this explains everything:

It’s been far too long since I’ve been able to post anything on this fracking site (and it still took me 20 minutes just to log in), but I figured I’d start everyone’s weekend off with a jolt of Pastor Joseph Grant Swank, Jr.

In today’s edition, the good pastor examines one of the biggest social problems of our day: apparently, the gays are driving black folks away from Jesus. Take a look:

HOMOSEXUALITY TEARING APART BLACK CHURCHES

By J. Grant Swank, Jr.

The disease spreads further.

Once large black churches have lost members due to the pastor changing from the biblical data regarding the active homosexual lifestyle to accepting the active homosexual lifestyle.

Nope, I got no idea what the fuck I just read.

Black parishioners who once were loyal have disappeared, some having been members since childhood, others driving from the suburbs into the inner city but no more.

The gays are forcing black preachers to stay out of the inner cities now? Wow! What other wicked powers lurk within their groins?

Read the rest of this entry »

McCain Stands in the Gap

Let’s put aside for a moment McCain/Feingold and the right’s other grievances against John McCain. When it comes to the war on terror, is he the Lincoln of our time?

Let’s see. So far this week, McCain has said:

• That if we withdraw from Iraq, then Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, currently deceased, will follow us back and attack the US.

This is doubly problematic given McCain’s claim last June that Zarqawi’s death was a “bit of a rebuke against those who are advocating that we cut and run out of Iraq.” Will his return from the grave somewhat strengthen the case for withdrawal? Many questions here.

• That parts of Baghdad are so safe, General Petraeus rides around them in an unarmored Humvee, and that “you and I could walk through those neighborhoods today.”

This should also raise a red flag of sorts, because not only is it more ignorant than a sack of wooden turnips, but due to recent attacks on the US complex in Baghdad, personnel inside the Green Zone are no longer able to walk to the cafeteria without body armor.

• That no, despite the fact that he’d said the thing about Petraeus and the Humvee on national television in front of millions of people, he actually never said it.

The GOP just isn’t making Lincolns like they used to!

Hinderaker, dense as a neutron star, gives his endorsement to the tough-talking anti-withdrawal petition that McCain is now circulating. The title is ‘Surrender Is Not An Option,’ which. . .because, you know, Republicans have had to backpedal a bit from ‘failure’ not being one:

To repeat just one line: “Success or failure in Iraq is the transcendent issue for our foreign policy and our national security.”

I’ve signed the petition.

We’re also circulating a petition of interest to Mr. Hinderaker. It demands the repudiation of false so-called biologists who promulgate the anti-Marxist doctrine of so-called genetic inheritance. There’s also another one that demands the construction of wicker and rattan airports, so that the planes will once again land with their cargo.

Paul Mirengoff, more gaseous than dense, counsels moderation:

PAUL adds: I respect and admire John McCain, especially on the issue of Iraq. But I’d have to put aside his advocacy on behalf of detainee rights before I could consider him the Lincoln of our time on the war on terror.

Right, he might also be anti-slavery, Paul. That’s a dangerous slippery-slope right there.

Some folks are talking-up the ERA again. Good for them. Unfortunately, their chatter has inspired reactionary gasbag David Frum, after an obligatory homage to Phyllis Schlafly, to offer a new frame-job on the ol’ conservatarian ‘Liberals have no new ideas’ argument:

We’ve been hearing since November about the resurgence of the progressive left – the new enthusiasm, the new energy, the new organizations, the new commitment. Amidst all these exciting novelty, there is only one thing lacking: new ideas. The resurgent “progressive” movement is the most backward-looking political force since William Jennings Bryan tried to repeal the industrial revolution. Their big issues – a government healthcare monopoly! do away with secret union ballots! and now … ERA! – date respectively to the 1940s, the 1930s, and the 1970s.

It’s just bizarre to tune into blogosphere debates to watch freshfaced 20-somethings passionately champion, as if just invented, policy proposals that were old when their grandparents were young. If this is progressiveness, what would reaction look like?

Above: Looking Backward Frum 2007 to 1215

This is rich, coming as it does from a spokesman of a movement whose raison d’etre has been (for forty years now) a repeal of the New Deal — or, failing that, repealing the New Deal mentality of the populace.

But the fucktardious asshelmet asked what reaction would look like. I shall be more helpful, then:

Read the rest of this entry »

Yes, we know. We’ve been chasing pieces of the site all over the Internet, while being locked out of our own server about 85% of the time.

We’re worried that everyone will abandon us. How funny is a blog that you can’t even look at properly? Not very funny at all! What good are we? Not much lately!

But like the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree, some magical somethingness is going on to make us all big and shiny and make all the other kids stop laughing and poking fun.

No, serious this time. Coming up right-soon. We’ll have more details when we claw our way onto the server later.

-teh custodial staff

Above: We ought to have been suspicious when the hosting contract was all misspelled and covered in paw prints.