Posted on June 2nd, 2009 by Gavin M.
Update: Uh, some guy with a Muslim name shot two soldiers at a recruiting station today, killing one, so everything equals opposite, and never mind about the abortion doctor.
Leading the way in this regard is our pal Confederate Yankee, who began this morning by absolving the right of any responsibility for the murder of ‘infanticide specialist’ George Tiller, or for the alleged gunman, the far-out-of-the-mainstream Scott Roeder — who is extremely super-far outside the mainstream of American thought, as such thought is represented by the ‘center-right blogosphere,’ including such sites as ConfederateYankee.com. Such things being as they are, Mr. Yankee directs attention instead toward the real issues: Andrew Mickel and protesters against John Yoo, both emblematic of the far-out-of-the-mainstream extreme hard-left, as it is represented by the entire left, including entities such as the US Government.
We are then treated to some of the ol’ Con Yank legerdemain for which he is justly famed, with the very next post (from this evening) sirening up an alarm about ‘African-American Muslim converts,’ a group with an established pattern of allegedly one and also possibly two recent terror-type incidents, if any. This group is extremely mainstream because of an associative likeness to President Teh Blaxxor, with his “ties to certain terrorists/authors and the 20 years he spent in the congregation of a racial separatist church.”
Anyway, right, like he said, that abortion-doctor thing — not that it mattered except as an indictment of the left — is totally canceled out in rock-bashes-scissors fashion by the appearance of a similar yet more salutary news item. Interestingly, this replacement item is made of a special kind of rock that is immune to being covered by paper, should an item of that substance next appear under consideration. In other words, no backs, double tax.
ABOVE: In the midnight hour, she cried
‘Moe, Moe, Moe.’
Where were we? Oh yeah:
Moe Lane, RedState:
Welcome to the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy, Gawker.
Oh, stop squirming. Having the chip put in doesn’t hurt *that* much.
No, it’s having the gunshot wounds put in that really hurts. Ha ha! When you’re at church!
Ha ha! For it’s just one church-shootin’ laugh after another, with laugh upon laugh in unending series. God damn that filthy DHS and their fascist report on so-called ‘right-wing extremism,’ which was made out of a big fat loaf of Khmer Rouge with Hitler sprinkles, and served in a bain chaud of the collected single tears of thousands of lone Twin Tower eagles.
And God-double-damn that ding-whoop, dang-blasted Bill Ayers, by the way, for this terrible reaping of what Obama has sown, domestic-terrorwise.
Ooh fine, we’ll just say it: All those hard-left far-liberals who are always criticizing other people’s gunmen should instead take a look in the mirror and criticize themselves, and then be criticized by conservatives, and then they should finally go back into the world and criticize one another, while conservatives help by also criticizing them and providing gunmen.
That’s a little thing that we like to call ‘reality,’ folks. Because these gunmen aren’t coming from nowhere and shooting at nobody. Quite to the contrary, they’re coming from their houses and cars and shooting at liberals. Does anyone seriously think that the liberals have no part in this? If indeed it’s the houses and cars that are causing it, then how could hundreds of commentators and talk radio hosts all simultaneously be wrong about liberals equaling insect vermin, all in exactly the same way?
I suppose they’re all tinfoil-hat lazy-metaphor-thing, with the being crazy and the hat made of tinfoil (i.e., non-depletable off-the-shelf expression for ‘believing in conspiracies’) — and not only that, but it’s like a tinfoil hat ‘on steroids,’ meaning agh uck strangled gluck by own intestines gack argle.
I’m sorry to have to tell you folks at The Gawker this, but it’s over. You’ve been tagged by the…
Hi, Betty White here for 1-800-PetMeds. Why are we picking on Moe today? Like life, it is random; but like shootings in churches, it is the fault, nay the responsibility, nay the re-fault-si-blame-ity of Young Bill Ayers, who is right now planning bombings in the early 1970s that might as well have killed somebody.
Yet isn’t it suspicious that all a right-winger has to do is to succeed where Ayers failed — i.e. in killing people — and all of a sudden, there’s not a word in the liberal media about Ayers, Saul Alinksy, or Tom Hayden, who were noted radicals of a kind that could easily have killed people at an equal or even greater rate than the right, for a combined total of many decades?
Not a single word about the millions of conservatives, statistically 100%, who didn’t kill a single person that day? Even though statistically, no conservative even killed anybody at all?
WOW, I GUESS THIS IS WHY THEY CALL IT THE ‘LIBERAL MEDIA,’ HUH? Hellzapoppin’, shiver me timbers. A heh in need is a heh-indeed. Blarf.
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