Yo Ahmad, let’s figure out the details later, ok?

The Associated Press reports:

BAGHDAD, Iraq (AP) – Iraq’s interim government voted Tuesday to establish a war crimes tribunal to prosecute top members of Saddam Hussein’s regime, two people who attended the meeting said. …

One Governing Council member, Younadem Kana, told The Associated Press that the court’s proceedings would be open to the Iraqi public – and possibly broadcast on television.

In the unlikely event that Saddam himself is captured alive, he presumably would be tried by the special tribunal as well.

It remained unclear whether the law included the death penalty, although Kana said most council members agreed it should – “like in Texas.”

American legal advisers coached the Governing Council lawyers who drafted the tribunal law, which is similar to proposals made in Washington in April. But Kana said the decision to ratify the law was the council’s alone.

Before the council’s decision, Entifadh Qanbar, spokesman for Governing Council member Ahmad Chalabi, said the details of the court remained to be worked out.

He said he envisioned 10 courthouses, each with five judges and five prosecutors, along with a nine-judge appeals court. Qanbar said public defenders would be made available to suspects who couldn’t afford their own attorneys. [Emphasis added]

(8) I had a vision of love (8)
(8) And it was all that you’ve given to me (8)

 

He’s just being his own worst enemy

TBOGG links to this William Kristol column which argues that George W. Bush is a most awesome excellent president whose only problem is that he has chosen to surround himself with a staff full of incompetent fucktards.*

TBOGG’s summary of the problem looks exactly right to us.

* Update: Kristol actually calls them clueless mofos, not fucktards. Our apologies.

 

If by writing, you mean cutting and pasting

Well, it’s that time of the year again over at Andrew’s house: time for a good old circle jerk over a pile of Talking Bush Dolls. No, wait, that’s our house. At Andrew’s it’s time for beg pledge week. The first report is that the theft pledge is going very well. Which makes us wonder why Mr. Sullivan finds it necessary to lie about the success of the Daily Dish or the work needed to keep it going. Item 1 is this bit of nonsense:

The very success of the site – doubling in traffic roughly every twelve months – has also meant ever-expanding expenses, bandwidth and workload.

Not so fast. You can see the stats here. January 2002 shows 198,993 visitors, a year later there were 311,518 visitors. October 2003 (that’s 21 months later if you’re keeping track) clocks in at 380,099 visitors, i.e. nearly the double. But not quite. And not in a year. We’ll see what November had in store for us, but if Alexa is any guide Sullivan’s traffic (like InstaPundit’s) is heading down, not up.

But the begging is not done:

From filtering through over 700 emails a day to scanning the Internet for stories and ideas to writing tens of thousands of words a month, this blog is a full-time job.

Oh no no no no — no no no! We shall limit our research to a single week of the Daily Dish (last week for no reason in particular.) Microsoft Word reports that it contained 7,603 words. A rough count shows that about half of that consists of quotes from articles, poseur alerts, and emails from Sullivan’s other personalities readers. Once you count the part of the DailyDish Sullivan recycles into the WeeklyDish for the Washington Times, one is left with a couple of long posts on Reagan and AIDS or gay marriage, and a whole lot of linking to articles that argue the opposite of what Sullivan pretends they do. (i.e. sullivan, v. To base your argument on a source that actually argues the opposite of what you claim it does. And yes, we coined that verb!)

All of which is our way of saying that there are bloggers out there who: a) actually invest a lot of time into their work, and b) do so without the benefit of full time writing jobs that pay the bills. And without (allegedly) collecting $75,000 a year to do it. And on top of our list is SullyWatch, who has decided to run a competing (and much more deserving) pledge week to keep its work going, and free it from the mediocrity that is blogger. Really, how often do the blogspot sites need to be down in a single week. (And besides, who collects $75,000 in a single year and then chooses to stay on blogger?)

So stop by for SullyWatch’s pledge week — because frankly if there’s one full time (and underpaid) job out there it’s keeping track of Sullivan’s bullshit, lies and distortions.

The same point we make about CTRL-C/CTRL-V, only much funnier, over at World O’Crap.

 

Do the terrorists know we’re winning?

If not, could someone please tell them?

Car Bomb Wounds 41 U.S. Troops in Iraq
TALAFAR, Iraq (AP) — A suicide bomber blew up a car packed with explosives at the gates of a military barracks early Tuesday, wounding 41 American troops just hours after three soldiers died in a road accident in central Iraq, the military said. …
In Baghdad, a rocket attack on a mosque left three Iraqi civilians dead.
link

An Afghan engineer working with an Afghan nongovernmental organization was killed and another injured in an ambush in Ghazni Province in southeastern Afghanistan on Monday, Afghan Islamic Press (AIP) reported. link

The North Atlantic Treaty Organization took over command of the 5,300-strong ISAF from Germany in August this year.
In October the United Nations and NATO agreed to expand ISAF?s area of control beyond Kabul to help clamp down on a recent rise in violence blamed on a resurgent Taliban. But so far the only concrete action has been helping German troops to set up a civil-military operation in the peaceful northern town of Kunduz. link

KABUL (AP) – The U.S. military launched its largest postwar offensive against Taliban and al-Qaida insurgents Monday, sending 2,000 soldiers into a lawless swath of Afghanistan to put down a wave of attacks that has undermined U.S. claims of building stability in the country. link

 

Who are you people?

A visit to our secret logs this morning showed that since last night we had 940 visitors referred by National Review’s The Corner. We were a bit surprised because, to be perfectly honest, that is 940 more than what we usually get. And so off we went to the corner where we found this:

FOLLOW-UP ON GROSSEST PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT [John Derbyshire]
I have inspired a competition (search on “derb” ).

Derb linked to our Festivus pornographic stick figures caption contest! O-M-G! Derb, if you’re reading this, tears of joy gently rolled down our cheeks seeing our mostly anonymous efforts being singled out in this manner. It was almost enough to make us feel bad about that time we called you a talentless and lying hack back in August.

This, truly, is another festivus miracle!

 

The Boys Are Back in Town

Blair sends us this New York Times article on the exile community’s shattered dreams:

BAGHDAD, Iraq, Dec. 7. The way the exiles tell it, they are a gift to Iraq, shining role models for the new state.

“People look up to those of us coming from abroad,” said Mowaffak al-Rubaie, a member of the Iraqi Governing Council who lived in London for nearly 25 years. …

Today, most of the former opposition leaders appear intoxicated with their roles as interim leaders after decades in the political wilderness. …

But in general, Bush administration officials now say, enthusiasm for the exiles has diminished over the months of occupation, as they have proved less reliable allies than many American officials had supposed before the war.

Ahmad Chalabi, who had been a favorite among Pentagon officials, is now out of favor among some because of his sharp public criticism of the Bush administration. When he visited Washington in September, he was not granted a meeting with President Bush.

Cue (8) Shattered Dreams (8)

So much for your promises They died the day you let me go
Caught up in a web of lies But it was just too late to know
I thought it was you who would stand by my side
And now you’ve given me, given me
Nothing but shattered dreams, shattered dreams
Feel like I could run away, run away
From this empty heart
You said you’d die for me
Woke up to reality And found the future not so bright
I dreamt the impossible That maybe things could work out right
I thought it was you who would do me no wrong
And now you’ve given me, given me
Nothing but shattered dreams, shattered dreams

How very sad for Ahmad!

 

The Ambiguously Gay GOP

Steve at No More Mister Nice Blog links to this NYT story with some background information on the ship the Republicans had hoped to use for their convention in New York City next year:

Mr. DeLay, whose party’s relation with gay voters has been awkward at best, happened to pick a ship with a great reputation among gays and lesbians. Rosie O’Donnell and her partner, Kelli Carpenter O’Donnell, have a travel company, R. Family Vacations, that has chartered the entire Norwegian Dawn next summer for what the company advertises as “the very first gay and lesbian family cruise” with “our very own special brand of gay and lesbian family-friendly fun.”

The ship is also a favorite of Atlantis Events, a gay and lesbian tour company based in Hollywood that has advertised its trips with a different kind of marketing: “Three of the best gay D.J.’s spinning today will keep you dancing until the sun comes up.” The company’s president, Rich Campbell, said he was ready to help Mr. DeLay and his delegates dance the night away.

Maybe it’s a good thing they changed their plans — we would have probably died laughing over the inevitable coverage. And just think of those poor people at The Corner.

 

You took the words right out of my mouth

I was just about to say “are you fucking kidding me?!?”

If Newsmax is any indication, love is in the air and our breakfast is in the bucket:

Talking Presidents? newest action figure, George W. Bush: Top Gun, is something new for the company. The figure does not talk but does come dressed in a full flight suit, helmet, goggles, breather and tanks that are identical to the ones George Bush wore when he landed on the flight deck of the U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln. …

The figure captures the good ol? boy essence of the original George, from his rugged Texas back country good looks and characteristic placid political face. Its resemblance to the 43rd President is amazing, duplicating his crystal blue eyes, engaging smile and chiseled features. The box in which the figure comes in is larger in scale than other Talking Presidents figure boxes. A flip open front panel reveals the full [CENSORED BY SADLY, NO!] …

George W. Bush has been labeled many things: a family man, a shrewd politician, an astute business man, an honest citizen, an environmental deterrent and much more. [Emphasis added]

Seinfeld’s The Big Salad episode:

Elaine: Perhaps there’s more to [Newman] than meets the eye.
Jerry: No, there’s less.

And by the way, here are your chiseled features and crystal blue eyes:

Bush-topgun-face.jpg

And yes, the filename is that given by Newsmax, not us.

 

The first ever spectacular Sadly, No! Festivus caption contest

Yes, the time has come for the amazing Sadly, No! Festivus caption contest. Unlike many other similar contests that award nothing (yes, we’re talking to you Norbizness!) this one will see the lucky winner receive: (drum roll)

A 1:43 reproduction of the upcoming smart forfour. (Seen below in its 1:1 model.)

smart.jpg

This amazing product is not yet available in stores (in either 1:43 or 1:1 size) and is guaranteed to become a collector’s item. Or not. In order to receive the prize, the winner will have to provide a mailing address, because we’re sure as hell not giving ours so you can pick it up. Winning entries will be chosen by a group of mean spirited people. You may enter as many times as you wish. You need not accept the prize even if you win. The smart forfour is no more dangerous than happy fun ball.

Enough already, what is the fucking contest?!?

Please provide a caption for one (or more) of the 11 pornographic stick figures pictured below, numbered for your convenience. Although they were featured in a safe sex ad quoted by John Derbyshyre at the Corner, the caption need not involve STDs or John Derbyshyre.

But frankly it wouldn’t hurt if it did.

Contest ends in one week, or when we get tired of it. Send all complaints to [email protected].

contest.jpg
contest2.jpg

 

My heart goes Sa-ma-rra-rra-rra

The Financial Times reports:

A week after a vicious firefight in the streets of Samarra, in which US forces claim to have killed 54 guerrilla fighters, it was unclear yesterday who really controlled the town.

At the one remaining US military compound in the city, US soldiers yesterday refused to leave their sand-bagged bunkers to meet a western visitor at the gate. “It’s dangerous here! Go away!” yelled one. Two other such US compounds within Samarra have been vacated in the past three weeks.

US-paid Iraqi troops of the Iraqi Civil Defense Corps (ICDC) have not entered the town since one of their number was killed on Saturday, shot by enraged mourners after his squad crossed paths with a funeral procession for a man slain in last week’s shoot-out. …

At the police headquarters in Samarra yesterday, many high-ranking officers openly expressed sympathy for the anti-coalition guerrillas, speaking on the condition that they not be named. “The whole town rejects the occupation, and we work to serve the citizens,” said one. [Emphasis added]

FU, meet BAR. BAR, meet FU.

Oh, hello FUBAR.