Posted on November 27th, 2004 by
Jonah Goldberg emails the management to share this deep thought:
You’re all class.
Jonah Goldberg
Stop, you had us at you’re.
We can only guess that Mr. Goldberg was especially impressed with this post:
Jonah Goldberg.
Claim to fame: Said to have popularized a joke first made on The Simpsons, a Top 10 television program.
Pro: Ability to mention popular television programs gives conservatives illusion they are the cool and hip kids.
Con: Ability to mention popular television programs leads to cognitive dissonance whenever one features nudity, profanity, or homosexuals leading ordinary lives.
Other noteworthy observations: Last person to have had contact with Lucianne Goldberg’s vagina.
Posted on November 26th, 2004 by
Happy holidays everyone!
The “reality-based community”? I know that’s what idiot-fringe leftist bloggers like Atrios call themselves.
Posted on November 26th, 2004 by
Can you blame us?
President George W. Bush Christmas Ornament
And by the way: why is the president wearing lipstick?
The glassblower creates the ornament using clear tempered glass, which gives the ornament noticeable weight. The ornament is then injected with liquid silver, which gives the ornament its special luminescence. Three applications of paint are required to achieve a spectacular level of detail, and a final dusting of glitter is applied to give your ornament extra sparkle.
Oh, it’s got sparkle baby. It’s got sparkle up the ying yang!
Posted on November 25th, 2004 by
You’re damn right we are!
Posted on November 25th, 2004 by
The management is delighted to introduce a new feature in honor of Thanksgiving* called “and by the way…” (ABTW.) ABTW will feature a particularly insightful bit of wisdom from a random wingnut. It resembles the shorter concept without requiring us to credit busy, busy, busy or Daniel Davies, while also bearing striking resemblance to “Who said it?” without forcing us to pay royalties to World O’Crap.
The formalities being out of the way, we bring you this week’s ABTW featuring Bucktowndusty:
And by the way, God doesn’t want naturalized citizens to be elected to the White House.
* Actually, we just wrote that because Thanksgiving is coming up. Truth is, we don’t really give a crap.
Posted on November 24th, 2004 by
Posted on November 23rd, 2004 by
The management of Sadly, No! is proud to declare itself the official winner of this weekend’s Ukrainian presidential election. We call on our opponents to concede for the good of the country.
Danke.
Posted on November 23rd, 2004 by
According to CNN and the FBI:
In other news, FBI: Bank robbers “in it for the money.”
(Thanks to pinki for the link and the joke.)
Posted on November 23rd, 2004 by
Picking up the leftovers from World O’Crap, we take a look at Hugh Hewitt’s column to identify the five “best” conservative writers to replace William Safire at the New York Times. While we’re happy to look at Hugh’s 5 candidates, we’ve prepared a slightly different version of the case for (or against) each.
Jonah Goldberg.
Claim to fame: Said to have popularized a joke first made on The Simpsons, a Top 10 television program.
Pro: Ability to mention popular television programs gives conservatives illusion they are the cool and hip kids.
Con: Ability to mention popular television programs leads to cognitive dissonance whenever one features nudity, profanity, or homosexuals leading ordinary lives.
Other noteworthy observations: Last person to have had contact with Lucianne Goldberg’s vagina.
Stephen Hayes
Claim to fame: Discovered connections between Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden that had escaped even Laurie Mylroie‘s attention.
Pro: Only conservative writer who can out-hunch William Safire with patented firebrand lunacy.?
Con: Exciting Tales From The Conservative Alternate Universe slot already taken up by David Brooks.
James Lileks
Claim to fame: Willingness to write long pieces without having anything that might resemble point makes ideal space filler for days when Thomas Friedman runs out of metaphors.
Pro: Leading international expert on Target.
Con: Leading international expert on Target.
Peter Robinson
Claim to fame: Wrote a book on his days working as a speech-writer for Ronald Reagan, which he has plugged 9,845 times on National Review’s The Corner.
Pro: Is not Kathryn Jean Lopez.
Con: Expected to lobby to have the New York Times’ name changed to The Reagan Times.
Mark Steyn
Claim to fame: Only Canadian to be a bigger (and more irritating) hack than David Frum.
Pro: Has mastered the use of the grain of galt debate technique.
Con: If followed, his advice would mean the US would run out of places to bomb to smithereens long before the end of Bush’s term.
Posted on November 22nd, 2004 by
The management just returned home after a weekend spent moving our furniture to Hamburg. (We’ll follow next week.) If you’ll allow us to get some sleep, we promise to start snarking it up tomorrow, just like in the good old days (i.e. last week.)
Merci.