Sadly, No!

Yeah, I know. But I can’t resist telling you once again what has disgusted me so. Tristero makes the point in a more felicitous, more coherent way than I did:

[T]here is a serious intellectual crisis in this country. Bush/Iraq – especially the failure of the media to catch on before it was too late – is a direct consequence of that. That folks like [Jonathan] Chait [who was for the Iraq War] still command enough respect to have the opportunity to write cover articles for the New Republic – on any subject – while those who were absolutely right about this debacle from the start are still all but completely ignored by “respectable” opinion-making journalism should be cause for genuine alarm. Without truly intelligent, educated, and street-smart voices available to raise a …hullabaloo before it’s too late, this country is almost guaranteed to repeat the spectacular debacle of Iraq in the near future. And I don’t see enough of those voices in the mainstream political discourse.

It’s not just in the ‘MSM’, though. It’s everywhere.

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Three GOP presidential candidates admitted that they didn’t believe in evolution tonight. Crooks and Liars has the video. It is absolutely hilarious. Go watch.

Mr. Caleb Warnock, of the Provo Utah Daily Herald, was kind enough to assure us that this account of the now-notorious Don Larsen story is unexaggerated, and to point us toward the continuing saga of the Utah County Republicans.

We quit. There’s nowhere left to go from here.

Convention ends with Satan and immigrants
CALEB WARNOCK – Daily Herald

Utah County Republicans ended their convention on Saturday by debating Satan’s influence on illegal immigrants.

The group was unable to take official action because not enough members stuck around long enough to vote, despite the pleadings of party officials. The convention was held at Canyon View Junior High School.

Don Larsen, chairman of legislative District 65 for the Utah County Republican Party, had submitted a resolution warning that Satan’s minions want to eliminate national borders and do away with sovereignty.

In a speech at the convention, Larsen told those gathered that illegal immigrants “hate American people” and “are determined to destroy this country, and there is nothing they won’t do.”

Illegal aliens are in control of the media, and working in tandem with Democrats, are trying to “destroy Christian America” and replace it with “a godless new world order — and that is not extremism, that is fact,” Larsen said.

At the end of his speech, Larsen began to cry, saying illegal immigrants were trying to bring about the destruction of the U.S. “by self invasion.”

I keep trying to find a place to stop quoting this article, but it’s hopeless. The next paragraph continues:

Republican officials then allowed speakers to defend and refute the resolution. One speaker, who was identified as “Joe,” said illegal immigrants were Marxist and under the influence of the devil. Another, who declined to give her name to the Daily Herald, said illegal immigrants should not be allowed because “they are not going to become Republicans and stop flying the flag upside down. … If they want to be Americans, they should learn to speak English and fly their flag like we do.”

A passing Hispanic woman, who declined to give her name, retorted that the Spanish for ‘freak flag,’ bandera insano, ought to be good enough for any pocha loca Republican who smells like an old tunafish factory anyway, adding that immigrants were unlikely to become Republicans because “maybe it’ll make us ugly inside like you.”

Calls of “no she didn’t” were exchanged until a resolution was adopted requiring that prospective Republicans of Hispanic descent or appearance eschew “tacofascism” and continue to “think inside the bun.”

Senator Howard Stephenson, R-Draper, spoke against the resolution, saying Larsen, whom he called a “true patriot and a close friend,” was embarrassing the Republican Party.

“I agree with 95 percent of this resolution but it has some language that is divisive and not inspiring other people to its vision,” he said. “This only gives fodder to the liberal media to give negative attention to the Republican Party.”

Above: It’s like Stephenson was seeing into the future!
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Wonder what’s brewing with ol’ Confederate Yankee these days.

Illusions of Safety

As many of you know, I work part-time at a sporting goods store behind the gun counter.

Why does this not come as a surprise?

Above: The Southern militiaman’s gatekeeper to tacticul fah-rarms
 

Animation: Righteous Bubba

I swear, it’s almost like David Broder is begging bloggers to make fun of him with this column:

Thankless Bipartisanship

By David S. Broder

On Monday, with few of his colleagues present and the Senate press galleries largely unoccupied, Sen. Lamar Alexander of Tennessee took the floor to make one of those statements that fill the Congressional Record but rarely go any further.

“Last week,” he said, “while the media covered Iraq and U.S. attorneys, the Senate spent three days debating and passing perhaps the most important piece of legislation of this two-year session. Almost no one noticed.”

Alexander has a point. The bill, boldly named the America Competes Act, authorized an additional $16 billion over four years as part of a $60 billion effort to “double spending for physical sciences research, recruit 10,000 new math and science teachers and retrain 250,000 more, provide grants to researchers and invest more in high-risk, high-payoff research.”

As Alexander noted, “these were recommendations of a National Academy of Sciences task force” that he and others had asked to tell Congress the 10 things it most urgently needed to do “to help America keep its brainpower advantage so we can keep our jobs from going to China and India.”

David, let me explain something to you.

Investing money in physical sciences research and recruiting more math and science teachers is what we call a “no-brainer.” It’s such an obviously smart thing to do that I’d recommend jailing every single senator who voted against it for high crimes of dumbassery. Praising senators for passing this bill is like praising them for agreeing to pay people to clean toilets in the Capitol building. Hell, I can just imagine the Broder column that bill would result in…

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Does Glenn Greenwald Ever Tell The Truth?

Above: Another reason the show isn’t called ‘Informed Sources’

• Regarding the recent Harvey Mansfield editorial which argues that the President should rule as a lawless dictator, the real fascist is the lying Glenn Greenwald, who dishonestly ignores points that might have been in the editorial, had I written it.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.

What was that about ‘beating on a beached jellyfish with a baseball bat’?

Gavin, I think I’ve found your jellyfish. It’s name is Symposium. It has cute little tentacles named Bill Bennett, Victor Davis Hanson and Mackubin Thomas Owens. Watch them jerk spasmodically, clinging pathetically to the last vestiges of life, unaware that the tiny bundle of proto-hypothalamic tissue they once served has fired its last synapse.

Can This Washington Be Saved? Can This War?
After the veto.

By Symposium

On Tuesday night, President Bush vetoed the supplemental war-funding bill. National Review Online asked a group of experts, who include a former senator, a former Cabinet secretary, an Iraq-war vet, a relative of an American murdered on September 11, 2001, a historian, and policy experts: How big a deal was the president’s veto Tuesday night? Can this Washington be saved? Can this war?

Okay, I’m officially confused. Which Washington is Symposium even talking about? The capital? The state? The smooth jazz sax player? The speedy but ultimately disappointing Major League right fielder?

Let’s ask Bill Bennett. Bet he knows.

William J. Bennett: I know what the polling says. You don’t poll a war. But if you want a poll, here’s the one I’d write and we’ll see what response it gets: “Do you support pulling troops from Iraq if you know a bloodbath will follow and al Qaeda will declare victory?� Poll that question please. It’s the most accurate prognostication you can get.

Let it ride, Billy Boy! Momma needs some news-Jews-can-use! But seriously, what’s happening in Iraq now isn’t a bloodbath? And, like, who gives a crap what al Qaeda declares? I think they’ve declared gambling to be really bad … and as you know, Atlantic City is still very much in business. So here’s an idea: Let’s have Bill Bennett square off against Osama bin Laden in a game of canasta. The stakes? Nothing less than the fate of the free world. Because that totally worked in ‘Casino Royale’.
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Above: Thomas Sowell is a senior fellow at the Hoover Institute and an author

Thomas Sowell must be lying on the porch in a pool of Country Time lemonade, because he’s off his damn rocker:

Sometimes it seems as if everybody is trying to rip off his own little piece of America, until we are all torn apart.

Easy there, big fella. Freedom isn’t free.

The last time I saw a Republican express outrage was 1991, when Clarence Thomas told the Senators what he thought of the smear tactics used against him. Before that, it was Ronald Reagan saying, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” Before that, it was probably Teddy Roosevelt.

Thomas Sowell, I would like you to meet former President Bill Clinton. Former President — Oh, my mistake. I see you’ve already met. Hark, look yonder: Society is just now making her entrance on the grand staircase.

[Gavin adds: The last time I saw a Republican express outrage was. . .oh, well, it’s hard to say exactly, because after awhile it all began to resemble a singular sustained howl, much like like an infinity of coyotes baying under an eternal full moon. Sometimes there are also screeches and a low, baleful moaning that at times seems nearly human. Pretty spooky. How old was Sowell when Teddy Roosevelt passed away in 1919?]

Too many people in positions of responsibility act as if these are just positions of opportunity — for themselves. The ones who simply steal money probably do less harm than teachers who propagandize their students, media who slant the news or politicians who sell out their country’s interests in order to get re-elected.

Mr. Sowell, I’m sure you know Tom DeLay and Duke Cunningha — Seriously? My apologies, but I thought you might’ve met before. Dear me.

A reader wrote: “Have you ever noticed that opinion polls ask the opinions of people who have no expertise in the subject on which they are being polled and publish these opinions as if they were gospel truth instead of group ignorance?”

This person is described as a reader, but I assure you they couldn’t possibly be. A reader, that is.

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In our first story this evening, a Michigan man almost blew his hand off with a homemade cherry bomb. Debbie Schlussel reports.

Above: Schlussel

Since Muslim terrorists are generally more clandestine–and occasionally more clever–than that, looking for the best way to hurt the most infidels and not get caught, the man and his buddies might not be Muslims. But who knows? We know how the media generally tries to shield the “Religion of Peace,” from any and all crimes–like the Trolley Square terrorist in Utah, the UNC jeep jihadist in Raleigh, NC, the Seattle Jewish Community Center terrorist, etc., etc., etc., ad nauseam.

Regardless, I would be remiss in not pointing out the large Muslim Paki, er . . . Pakistani population in Canton. After all, I wouldn’t want to disappoint my friends from the deceptively-named, Nazi-funded Media Matters for America.

His neighbors in Canton certainly deserve to know his name for their own personal safety. And I’ll be following this case.

Thank you, Debbie. There remains no evidence that the man is Muslim. Also in the news, domestic terrorists attacked a women’s clinic, and a right-wing militia in Alabama was raided by Federal agents:

Militia raid targets weapons
Explosives, ammo found; 6 men arrested

Simultaneous raids carried out in four Alabama counties Thursday turned up truckloads of explosives and weapons, including 130 grenades, an improvised rocket launcher and 2,500 rounds of ammunition belonging to the small, but mightily armed, Alabama Free Militia.

Six alleged members of the Free Militia also were arrested by federal authorities and are being held without bond.

It is unclear whether the weapons cache included homemade cherry bombs, or whether any of the suspects are Jews Muslims. Wait, I mean Jews no, Muslims.

…I’m pretty sure it’s the Jews we’re supposed to be putting into camps, isn’t it?

Oh, no, wait: my bad. It’s totally teh Muslims.

Update:

Feds Accuse Alabama Militia of Planning Machine-Gun Attack on Mexicans

BIRMINGHAM, Alabama — Five members of a self-styled Alabama militia were denied bond Tuesday after a federal agent testified they planned a machine-gun attack on Mexicans. A sixth man accused of having weapons and explosives components in his home was approved for release.

It doesn’t say whether the Mexicans were Muslim.

The Case for the Strong Executive: Under some circumstances, the rule of law must yield to the need for energy.

Above: Harvey Mansfield, Professor of Government at Harvard University.

• All things considered, and I say this quite without irony, America’s potential can best be realized by a lawless and violent dictatorship in which George W. Bush reigns as absolute monarch.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.

Bonus ‘tut tut, old bean’ pull-quote:

Democrats today would be friendlier to executive power if they held the presidency–and Republicans would discover virtue in the rule of law if they held Congress.

Just like the last time the Republicans held Congress, in 1824.