Democracy? That’s For Sucka MCs, G.

Our vice-preznit in ack-shun:

Just past the Oval Office, in the private dining room overlooking the South Lawn, Vice President Cheney joined President Bush at a round parquet table they shared once a week. Cheney brought a four-page text, written in strict secrecy by his lawyer. He carried it back out with him after lunch.

In less than an hour, the document traversed a West Wing circuit that gave its words the power of command. It changed hands four times, according to witnesses, with emphatic instructions to bypass staff review. When it returned to the Oval Office, in a blue portfolio embossed with the presidential seal, Bush pulled a felt-tip pen from his pocket and signed without sitting down. Almost no one else had seen the text.

Cheney’s proposal had become a military order from the commander in chief. Foreign terrorism suspects held by the United States were stripped of access to any court — civilian or military, domestic or foreign. They could be confined indefinitely without charges and would be tried, if at all, in closed “military commissions.”

“What the hell just happened?” Secretary of State Colin L. Powell demanded, a witness said, when CNN announced the order that evening, Nov. 13, 2001. National security adviser Condoleezza Rice, incensed, sent an aide to find out. Even witnesses to the Oval Office signing said they did not know the vice president had played any part.

This would have been a good moment for Mr. Powell to have resigned in protest. I mean, things were obviously not going to get better from here on out. Resigning would have at least spared him the future humiliation of the UN WMD presentation.

The episode was a defining moment in Cheney’s tenure as the 46th vice president of the United States, a post the Constitution left all but devoid of formal authority. “Angler,” as the Secret Service code-named him, has approached the levers of power obliquely, skirting orderly lines of debate he once enforced as chief of staff to President Gerald R. Ford. He has battled a bureaucracy he saw as hostile, using intimate knowledge of its terrain. He has empowered aides to fight above their rank, taking on roles reserved in other times for a White House counsel or national security adviser. And he has found a ready patron in George W. Bush for edge-of-the-envelope views on executive supremacy that previous presidents did not assert.

In fairness to Cheney: he wouldn’t have to exert so much power if Bush weren’t so stupid:

Bush works most naturally, close observers said, at the level of broad objectives, broadly declared. Cheney, they said, inhabits an operational world in which means are matched with ends and some of the most important choices are made. When particulars rise to presidential notice, Cheney often steers the preparation of options and sits with Bush, in side-by-side wing chairs, as he is briefed.

In other words, Bush can’t understand anything that doesn’t include pictures of fluffy bunnies and cruise missiles, thus leaving Cheney around to do the (very, very) dirty work.

 

Late Night Music Thread

My nomination for the most criminally under-appreciated and unknown songwriter of the last 40 years goes to the still-amazing Richard Thompson. By the gods, look at his damn guitar pickin’ skillz:

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Why I Love Powerline

Take ‘er away, Deacon:

E.J. Dionne argues that the “center” in American politics is moving towards the left. I think he’s correct, though we may be one major terrorist attack and/or recession on a Democratic president’s watch away from having to revisit that view.

In other words, “Ooooooo, I hope disaster strikes in the next couple of years so people will freak out and vote us back into power!”

[Gavin adds: Comments are down tonight due to site tinkerage, f’shizzle.]

[Seb adds: Comments should be ok now.]

 

You Don’t Say!

Dan Riehl gets seriously Freudian:

The Battle For Iraq

The battle for Iraq continues and will continue for some time. We must continue to fight this relativity low causality war, whether we like it, or not.

“Low causality” indeed. You only wonder if he’s referring to the disconnect between cause and effect that got this disastrous war started in the first place, or to our Bizarro media world, where those who were the most wrong about the war back then enjoy some of the most cushy sinecures discussing it today …

Now, normally it’s just not cricket to make fun of typos on blogs: They happen to teh best of us, after all. But we couldn’t resist vis-a-vis Riehl, seeing as how in his very next post, he makes fun of somebody else’s.

 

Moving Toward The Dark Side

Stanley Greenberg, writing at the Prospect:

[T]here is a new reality that Democrats must deal with if they are to be successful going forward. In their breathtaking incompetence and comprehensive failure in government, Republicans have undermined Americans’ confidence in the ability of government to play a role in solving America’s problems. Democrats will not make sustainable gains unless they are able to restore the public’s confidence in its capacity to act through government.

I, for one, sympathize with the public here.

Back in my idealistic college socialist days, I used to think that the government could intervene to really help people and relieve many of free market capitalism’s inherent inequalities. Then Bush got elected, and my faith in the government to ever do anything but make war and act as an ATM machine for favored corporations went up in smoke. I used to want a government that would provide people with health insurance, give quality public education and help working-class people earn a better living. Nowadays, I’d be happy to have a government that wasn’t intent on destroying the world. Sad but true: I’m a cynical old man at the age of 27.

Is there anything the Democrats can do to restore my faith in government? Well, maybe. They could start by reforming the ridiculous lobbying culture that has so corrupted Congress for the past decade.

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Ha, Ma! Lookit That Arab Feller Git Tortured! Tuh-hilk!

Now this is the kind of wingnuttery I just love. From a blogger calling hisself (really) “Hillbilly White Trash“:

From The Washington Post:

The CIA will declassify hundreds of pages of long-secret records detailing some of the intelligence agency’s worst illegal abuses — the so-called “family jewels” documenting a quarter-century of overseas assassination attempts, domestic spying, kidnapping and infiltration of leftist groups from the 1950s to the 1970s, CIA Director Michael V. Hayden said yesterday.

The documents, to be publicly released next week, also include accounts of break-ins and theft, the agency’s opening of private mail to and from China and the Soviet Union, wiretaps and surveillance of journalists, and a series of “unwitting” tests on U.S. civilians, including the use of drugs.

The pathetic liberals at the Post think of these things as the “agency’s worst illegal abuses”. I see them as a sign that the CIA was earning its keep. The current lack of human intelligence we have on Islamic terrorist groups and the failure to “connect the dots” before 9/11 are the results of the reforms which were instituted to stop these “abuses”.

Think about it. Would not the people of Cuba be better off today if we had managed to kill Castro 50 years ago? Would the people of Iran, and the whole rest of the world, not be better off today if we had sent a hit team to put a bullet through Khomeini’s head before he managed to lead the Iranian Revolution? I know the Shah could be a right bastard to his enemies but since his enemies were the people who wanted to turn Iran into a fundamentalist Islamic terror state does it not seem, in retrospect, that they deserved to be tossed into a dungeon and tortured to death?

That thar is some fancy sit’ational ethics there, Cletus. The best way to preserve democracy is by throwin’ yer enemies in the slammer and goin’ to town on ’em with a drill ‘n’ a blowtorch. Yee-haw! She sounds like a hootenanny!

 

Teh Raft Of The Frickin’ Medusa

Oh God, Althouse is still on it.

Let’s Think More Deeply About The Meaning Of Carrots.

We’ve been talking a lot about carrots and onions, and I’ve had to interact with various on-line politicos who may hate me for political reasons but may also suffer from a kind of art-deafness. Why are they so into politics? I’m not. I’m an outsider to their game. I went to art school. Sometimes I think it’s like talking about color to someone who’s color blind or melody to someone who’s tone deaf. They encounter someone with a more artistic take on the political landscape, and they can only think to say “you’re crazy.” What can I do to help?

Well, the artist Evan Izer has been reading my posts, and he sent me these photographs of some of his artworks (and gave me permission to display them here).

Oh fine then, let’s have an art show.

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Woo! I Am A Deeply Silly Right-Wing Yakkity-Yakker. Teh Sadly (2003-Present). Digital Photo Collage.

You know, when a law professor who enjoyed a guest slot as a New York Times political columnist is claiming to be an ‘outsider’ via-a-vis a bunch of shoestring blogs, the hills are certainly alive with the sound of something.

But maybe we’re just big meanies who can’t appreciate the beauty of her soulful freedom-dance.

 

Well, What’d You Ask Me For, Then? Sheesh.

People think we don’t like right-wing blowhards. People are wrong. We love them. We love Daffyd ab Hugh and his sandwich addiction. We love Mark Noonan and his fleshy chinstrap. We love Pam Oshry and her many dead brain cells. And when you love someone, you want to help them.

Take Michelle Malkin, for example (who we love for the funny faces she makes when someone speaks Spanish around her).

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“[Snnf!] Hokay, who wan snotchos?”

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“Hmm. The nachos here are creamier than I remembered.”

When she announced that she would be helping out Jules Crittenden (who we love for his extensive G.I. Joe collection) with his Gitmo poetry contest, the poor dear was truly at sea. “What rhymes with ‘despicable’?” she asked, having lost her rhyming dictionary behind a pile of Mack Bolan novels.

Well, you know us. We’re always happy to help a Pinay sista out, so we used our highly privileged status as certified posters at MichelleMalkin.com to submit the following masterpiece:

Those people at Gitmo are really despicable
Their swarthy, cruel heads I find very kickable
Inhuman, they don’t bleed, and thus are quite prickable
Let’s pray they’re denied frozen treats that are lickable
I talk about them ’cause my fans find it clickable
Smart cookies are they and not at all trickable
It’s not like the charges at Gitmo aren’t stickable
Or that in a fair trial they’d be unconvictable

The crazy thing is, Michelle deleted the post! Can you believe that? I mean, not to toot our own horns, but her only other suggestion for a word that rhymes with despicable was “liberal,” [Gavin adds: That’s inexplicable!] which, come on. Some people just can’t learn to accept love.

 

From The Culture Bunker [Updated]

John Hawkins of Right Wing News shows us a new paradigm in diplomacy:

The Top Ten Movies We Should Screen In US Embassies

Over at Human Events, they’ve put together the “Top Ten Movies We’d Like to Screen in US Embassies” (part one & part two).

The idea is supposed to be to give foreigners a little taste of what Americans are like and how we think via our movies and well, you know me, I’ve seldom met a list that I didn’t like, so here goes…

Actually, the list gives rational, non-gibbering people a little taste of what the Human Events readership is like (the once-respectable journal now boasts Ann Coulter as its legal correspondent), and what it thinks foreign audiences ought to see and learn.* After you, John:

10) Red Dawn

If it were us being invaded, we’d launch a guerilla insurgency, and. . .uh, crap, wait a second.

9) True Grit

We’re hot on the trail of an outlaw named ‘Chaney,’ and. . .uh, crap, wait a second.

8) Team America: World Police

Ha Ha! Foreign things suck. Destroy them!

7) We Were Soldiers…

To Americans, there are no unjust wars — only honor and [munch-munch] dishonor. Hey Sgt. Mom, we’re almost out of Hot Pockets.

6) Spider-Man

See, they think he’s just a mild-mannered kid, but little do they know, little do they know, that he has the proportional strength of a spider. Also, if somebody tries to terrorize New York by flying around on a metal broomstick and hucking exploding pumpkins — just to give one example — ordinary citizens will united-we-stand and pelt you, I mean them, with rocks and garbage from the deck of the 59th Street Bridge. That’s a little thing we like to call ‘America.’

5) Patton

Those who do not want to fight are malingerers. [munch-munch]**

4) Rocky 4

The Rocky series just kept getting better. Russians: We will punch you.

3) The Passion of the Christ

This stirring pro-Israel film. . .um, well, whatever. How about some popcorn, Mr. Olly Akbar?

2) The Patriot

Seagal was in top form in this bioterror thriller (1998), in which right-wing militias infect…? America? With a deadly…? Virus? Er, ‘inspiring’ is the word for the Mel Gibson remake (2000), set in the American Revolution. Message: Alas, but killing is the answer.

1) The Pursuit of Happyness

American life is grinding and futile, yet we. . .Ha ha! Look, a dirty hippie!

This selection would no doubt help boost America’s reputation in the world, now at such a low ebb.

Bonus film-flam:

Sci Fi Cartoon: Evil Humans Invade Alien Planet – An Allegory for US ‘Imperialism’
Posted by Warner Todd Huston on June 21, 2007 – 04:55.

It was bound to happen. A Sci Fi film is being produced presenting humans as the evil, alien aggressors invading a peace loving alien planet, the allegory, according to the producers, being a comment upon the “imperialism” of the United States. Innocent aliens being killed by evil, imperialist space faring humans and it appears to be all George Bush’s fault…again.

Science Fiction has used the alien invasion over and over for decades supposedly as an allegorical statement about the human condition contemporary to the production of a given film. In “Independence Day” the aliens are here to destroy us. This film was ridiculously criticized as nothing but “American jingoism” with Americans imagining themselves the saviors of the world because…

I’ve been trying to upload a photo of Huston to prove that he’s not human, but from some planet of walrus-people. (“Coincidentally,” the server is jammed.) What’s your real agenda, invader-scum!?


* [Footnote added some time later.] Holy canasta, this is only John’s list, not a Human Events effort. I thought it was the work of many small demented fools, i.e., a mob, but it turns out to be that of a single large demented one. So then, Hawkins: Rocky IV?!

* From the opening monologue of Patton: “Americans love to fight, traditionally. All real Americans love the sting and clash of battle…Americans play to win all of the time. I wouldn’t give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That’s why Americans have never lost nor will ever lose a war; for the very idea of losing is hateful to an American.”

 

Set Phasers on Delicious Ranch Dressing!

Holodeck abuser and political red shirt Dafydd ab Hugh won’t go away, despite having been killed off in the national script about three acts ago. No, he’s still lurking near the Craft Services table, having his wikipedia profile edited by furries and, of course, blogging.

Dafydd%20ab%AbHughLime.jpg

Today, Dafydd takes on Newt Gingrich, of all people … this despite the fact that Newt’s Contract with America “drew my enthusiastic cheerleading.”

The disturbing image of Dafydd in tights and anchoring a human pyramid aside, his disappointment concerns Newt’s updated 21st Century Contract with America, which apparently contains too few specifics on what Dafydd considers to be the pressing issues of our time: passenger flights to Ganymede and cleaning the Muslim-induced shitstains out of his pants (tights?*).

Newt’s “solutions” do not include anything about the seminal threat of our age, the war against global jihadism. In fact, his new contract barely even mentions defense at all, restricting itself to a mere platitude so bland and non-committal that anyone — even Sen. Hillary Clinton (D-Carpetbag, 95%), Senate Majority Leader Harry “Pinky” Reid (D-Caesar’s Palace, 90%), and Squeaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-Haight-Ashbury, 95%) — could enthusiastically applaud it …

That sort of wit makes you want to race out and buy Doom #1: Knee-Deep in the Dead, no? But wait, there’s more!

Disgusted with Gingrich, ab Hugh has serious questions for that erstwhile person of relevance:

– How he thinks we can — and whether he thinks we should — raise up the Non-Integrating Gap discussed by Thomas P.M. Barnett’s the Pentagon’s New Map, which may be driving the surge of militant islamism sweeping the ummah, to the level of the Functioning Core;

– Exactly what he means by “investing in… energy, space, and the environment.” What energy investments, for example? Is he talking about modern Integral Fast or Pebble Bed Modular Technology nuclear plants? Hydrogen-powered cars? High-temperature ceramic engines? Broadcast power? Better battery technology?

In space policy, does he support the manned Mars expedition, or any manned space exploration at all? Is he a fan of runway-to-orbit routine access to space for passengers and cargo? How about Shuttle II, orbital transfer vehicles (to transition from low to high earth orbit, for example), space-based weaponry**, solar power satellites, SDI, permanent space colonies (or even O’Neill colonies)?

Let me put it bluntly – man, I love me some Dafydd ab Hugh. But exactly what do I mean by “love”? Am I talking about integrating Intel Quad-Core Microprocessors in Virtualized VMware Servers to enable more powerful eHarmony SQL databases? Improvements in Ground-Piercing Radar to more efficiently pinpoint diamond-bearing Kimberlite pipes? The love of double foot-long sammiches? The love of double foot-long sammiches consumed in Zero-G on a pleasure cruise to Asteroid 3360 Syrinx?

[Gavin adds:

“Mr. Gingrich, ab Hugh here. Big fan. Sir, apropos Thomas P.M. Barnett’s The Pentagon’s New Map, which you have no doubt read, do you believe the US should ‘raise the non-integrating gap’ against militant Islamism by invading a Muslim country? And with Democrats threatening to betray our troops in Iraq, how should we. . .um, I don’t want to say ‘gloat,’ but rub in their snide faces the spectacular victory and flourishing of Democracy? If we decide to invade a Muslim country?† Thank you, sir.”

Gingrich: “Uh…”]

And then Dafydd gets all metaphysical:

Reading all this, I sincerely believe that Newt Gingrich has no plans to run for president anytime soon: If he were serious about running, he would be addressing real issues, not spouting meaningless truisms and tautologies that would draw the support of everybody from Alvin and Heidi Toffler and Ayn Rand to Hugo Chavez and Josef Stalin.

[Gavin adds: Because, you know, meaningless truisms and tautologies have had no place in recent American presidential campaigns.]

Which leads one to wonder if Dafydd is aware that two-fifths of those people have been dead and buried for some years, and are probably having some trouble supporting their own rib cages at this point, let alone Newt Gingrich talking points.

And then it dawns on you … of course! The holodeck! Dafydd, you sly dog … but Ayn Rand and Josef Stalin? That’s just sort of gross.


*Furry suit? Grrrr!

**With Viagra prices being what they are, Dafydd has found a cost-effective alternative: typing the words “space-based weaponry”.

† Barnett’s analysis has a significant flaw in that it calls a mulligan on Iraq.