All I wanna do is zoom-zoom-zoom-zoom and a boom-boom

Legal scholar and man whose real name is also his porn star name Hans von Spakovsky grabs into Jonah Goldberg’s Cheetos bag for a true classic: The real racists are liberals blacks people who point out racism:

There followed a steady stream of false claims that America was an inherently racist society with a biased judicial and law enforcement system. Obama rekindled a racial divide that had been steadily disappearing in American society.

You like? You ain’t seen nothing yet!

In his typical lawyerly fashion, the president skirted around the truth of cities riddled with racial tension and soaring crime rates […]

The violent crime increased in 2015 compared to 2014, yet it’s still lower than when Obama took office — indeed, it’s lower than the rate during any of Bush 43’s 8 years in office. [FBI]

We always save the best for last:

…and a foreign policy that seems to favor authoritarian regimes over our allies.

It’s so good to know that President T. is going to stick it to Germany while cozying up to Putin as of today, so order will be returned to the universe!

 

Dubya, Barack, Donald………..Profit?

Cypher on that title for a minute…Shit has gotten Real, Real, Son. Now those of you who are what one might call ‘familiar’ with me know that I am something of an up-jumped, tarted up Race-Pimp of the worse kind! First, I am a Lieberal: But because Lincoln freed the half of my posterity what was in bond-aged servitude prior to his assasination, means, in what passes for logic in Wingnuttia, that I should Be a Republican, like Jackie Robinson, because, that race traitor Lincoln was one.

While I can’t cite chapter and verse, I believe that I have actually heard this reasoning before in the wild, though current memory issues mean that a secure glimpse of what I heard or what I saw may have issued forth from the gob of Rush Limbaugh. Sue me for lack of citation, but even the most strident Rock-Ribbed Rushpublicans among you, or members of the Department of Anthropublican Studies, may have a similar recollection. And are invited to share any such memories in the comments below.

The cipher here, the big con in play being, of course, inoculation from any accusation of Racism. Lincoln was a Republican see, so Republicans can’t, by the transitive properties of Derp(checkpoint infinity, carry the one/translide with a catechized googleplex), be Racist,ever. Democraps, however will forever be saddled with a fusillade of bullshit within which will be a mention of Jefferson Davis, a fart to distract from the smoke-bomb that covers the getaway to higher ground and finished with a “See, I told you so!” (Gag shamelessly ripped from Edroso..TYVM, sir!).

Now after eight long years of bonded servitude White Folk can breathe freedoms cool fresh air, released from their chains and toil in the field, from the raping and from the lash, But now my friends, you are free, or will be in about ten hours after this is published, and likely by the time you read it.

I hope you remember us fondly, and I hope we did not treat you too poorly, and best of luck to all of us.

Sorry, but I can’t leave without saying this: This shit is going down! To Fucking Day! That was a nice little constitutional Republic we had there, so While it might be a bit late, we should get to work on some nets, working.

Interesting times, begun, they have!

 

Ouroborus. “The Normalization Continues Apace.” Ouroborus.

We have a bit under forty-eight hours before Emperor “tiny mittens” gets his hands on all up in Lady Liberties, Below the Belt Business, because he can, wink (if a dude), nudge (if a blind bat), and grab it (if a pussy).

Forgive me the vulgarity, but I still awake with sweats pondering not only the fact that the “short fingered Vulgarian” will become our President on Friday, slipping in through the back door in one of the shadiest of election outcomes in the History of the Republic, but doing so in his inimitable fashion, as if he was selected in a landslide and beloved by all of the people.

While I am not a Journalist, I am familiar with what might be considered a term of that art: “bury the lede.” And it would appear that we are in the midst of exactly that:”a failure to emphasize the most important part of a story or account.” And this, for me, at least seems unprecedented.

This is bigger than a few hanging chads in Florida, and if nothing else, I seem to remember quite well the “to-do” made of the very careful “recount” and of the baited breath that awaited the determination of every ‘hanging chad.’ Man, those were some heady times, and thank heaven above that that electoral anomaly, only gave us a couple of Humble Patriots, who ruled with grace and humility, and oversaw an abundance of peace and prosperity After fixing the disastrous mess of an economy left them by their predecessor, who had himself taken over a country in amazing economic shape left him by 12 years of prudent Republican governance experimenting with a new and amazing economic experiment, called by one side “Supply Side-economics” and by the other side “Trickle Down-economics” And as referred to by a few of my less than polite, or patriotic, friends, as the “Giant Golden Shower.”

 

First, the music on the Titanic just wasn’t that good

Charles “Chuckles” Krauthammer asks why Donald J. Trump is extremely unpopular:

For several reasons. First, the refusal of an unbending left to accept the legitimacy of Trump’s victory. It’s not just the demonstrators chanting “not my president.” It is leading Democrats pushing one line after another to delegitimize the election, as in: he lost the popular vote, it’s James Comey’s fault, the Russians did it. [Emphasis added]

Of course! Because clearly first couldn’t be reasons 2 and 3 (Trump is a major douche)… Trump’s bump, as per Quinniac, was up to 44, and he’s back to 37. It’s a really fascinating world where someone acting like a total dick ranks lower in accounting for that person’s popularity, or lack of, than leading Democrats pointing out fairly obvious things. As for the legitimacy argument, as Chuckles wrote in 2000:

This election has generated not one but two crises of legitimacy. The first arises from the real possibility that Al Gore wins the popular vote but loses the presidency.

 

The Donald did it!

From yesterday’s press conference, The World According to the Donald:

“And I will give Reince Priebus credit, because when Reince saw what was happening in the world and with this country, he went out and went to various firms and ordered a very, very strong hacking defense.”

A few minutes later:

“And I think I get some credit because I told Reince, and Reince did a phenomenal job, but I said I want strong hacking defense.”

 

Back to the beginning… (Unemployed, in Greenland?)

As a German might say: “hello all together”

It’s hard even for us to remember, but the very first sign of life of this blog was in July 2003, when we linked to one Ezra Levant, who had asked “Would a U.S. occupation show that France and Germany continued to help Saddam with his weapons of mass destruction after the first Gulf War, in violation of the UN sanctions?.” [Hopefully the answer to that amazing question is clear by now.]

A lot has happened in the 14 years that followed. There were plenty of times when we I wasn’t around, and this blog saw its share of very funny non-Seb writers.

S,N! crossed paths with some of the world’s internet’s best known nobodies, including Adam Yoshida, Donald Luskin, Amber Pawlik, David Frum, John Lott, Justin Darr, Steven Den Beste, Thomas Sowell, etc… Some of these distinguished individuals wrote to us, others ignored us. We remember the “goals” we’d set for this blog back in the summer of 2003: 200 readers a day. That seemed like quite a lot (compared to 0), and we ended up getting there (and then beyond). Once Bush left it seemed like a lot of the energy we’d had that leading to this blog fizzled somewhat.

Yet watching yesterday’s press conference made us think it might be a good time for a return to Sadly, No!’s unique brand of profanity-filled non sequiturs, abuse of the blog’s name/catchphrase, and inaccurate yet hilarious summaries of what other people have written. Were we ready to throw caution to the wind, we’d write (as we’ve done before), “I’m back, baby.” We are not. But given that we found time to write a spec script for Angie Tribeca last month, we figure there’s enough juice in the tank for some S,N!-related activities. You may start looking forward to a pie chart, coming your way later today.

— The Management

 

Hello Old Friends, We should Huddle Up!

Sorry for my delayed absence, but shit kind of got real real, on a number of health related tangents, each one of which could have proven fatal, so there is that, and the bounty for surmounting that sumptuous shit-laden sundae, was getting out of the hospital with just enough time to register at my current address, and get to the polls in time to cast a ballot…Which I did. Proudly, and with a smile on my face…And I wish that I could have done so without a lingering sense of existential panic which may have gotten me out of the Hospital a day or two sooner, as I was busting my ass to get back into a level of fitness that would let me leave…

Meanwhile, prior to my departure, I had the pleasure of watching a constitutionally unfit, uninvited inspector general of feminine genitalia, uncouth, lip pursing vulgarian with a hair do that makes the contents of barber-shop dumpsters, shudder in the middle of the night, win his party’s nomination for the president of the US of fuckinA.

You wouldn’t be wrong to wonder if it didn’t occur to me that the hard work, suffering, and fighting might not have been worth it, and on some days, I have to admit that the Jury is still deliberating, but the History geek within, regardless of his singular hatred of Winter, Is (lets see…trying to come up with a word or sentiment indicating, not exactly satisfaction, or relief, but maybe some intrinsically sick desire to be on the ground when the shit hit the fan), and in this case, I crawled through metaphorical shards of flaming glass to get a front row seat.

And as luck would have it, It would appear that I will be able to do so in the company of friends…

 

An Old Fashioned Fisking

Lets check in with what the b-list propagandists are saying. Victor Davis Hanson needs no introduction, he’s an accomplished historian, a god-knows-how-many-generations “farmer” of one of the more arid spots of of California, and an all around example of why people have come to distrust academia. In his latest column “The Animal Cunning and Instinct of Donald Trump” he has a lot to say about Donald Trump.

He starts off strong:

He grasped that what voters cared about were the very issues politicos were disdainfully ignoring.

So we think to ourselves, yes, yes he did. He saw that the Republican establishment had been taking racist votes without really making a direct appeal to them, he saw racists (and sexists, and various other flavors of bigots) as an easily motivated voting block who could be easily motivated to vote by making direct appeals to their paranoia, hatred, and selfishness”.

But that’s not where he’s going

In other words, Trump instinctively saw the miners of West Virginia — and by extension the working-class populations of states such as Pennsylvania, Michigan, and Ohio — as emblematic of the forgotten man, in a way few of his Republican rivals, much less Hilary Clinton, grasped.

No, good ol’ VDH is praising a straw Trump. A Trump that means what he says to carefully selected audiences. You know, as opposed to the Trump the rest of us see, and hear who changes his opinions more often than he changes his… (you thought I was going type ‘mistresses’ here didn’t you?) socks. But even VDH can smell what Trump is stepping in, what with him being a farmer from way back, I’m sure he’s smelled manure at some point in his life:

And even among minority groups, he detected a rising distaste for being patronized, especially by white, nasal-droning, elite pajama-boy nerds whose loud progressivism did not disguise their grating condescension.

Nice one, VDH. Pajama boy. Still got that hate on, years down the road? I’d say at this point it has lasted more than four hours, and you might want to seek help.

I think that there must be spectacles tinted even rosier than the most rosy tinted glasses than we were previously aware of, and that VDH is wearing them.

Trump then earned greater outrage when he questioned the CIA’s sudden announcement, via leaks, that the Russians had hacked Clinton-campaign communication. When Trump said that the newfound post-election “consensus” on Russian hacking was improper, unreliable, and suggestive of an overly politicized intelligence apparatus, he once again drew universal ire — proof positive that he lacked a “presidential” temperament.

Trump’s reaction to benefiting from Russian backing up to and including state sponsored hacking of Hillary Clinton and the DNC has been the same truth free bullshit that has been his entire adult life. A shrug and a smirk and a “what are you going to do about it?”.

So the rest of the column goes, implying that if trump is crazy that he’s crazy like a fox, and not on the other hand crazy like a narcissist who has finally found the biggest spot light of all.

 

2016 isn’t done with us yet

So of course the most Republican Republicans exercised their solemn democratic duty and elected Donald Trump. And it happened because we got too complacent with our civilization and forgot to read our history and maybe what this country (or an enough of us to squeak out an electoral college victory) really wants is black lists, war with somebody, the KKK, internment camps, selling out our commonly held resources and generally a full body embrace of the worst excesses unregulated capitalism has to offer. And I fear the most used acronym of the next four years is going to be IOKIYAR or perhaps WTYSBYTIWBFTETSHI (We Told You So, But You Thought It Would Be Fun To Elect The Shit Head Instead) It wasn’t ever really clear to me how much lip service was being paid by conservatives to the institutions of Democracy as long as they were operated mostly for the benefit of conservatives. I am surprised by the extent to which they are willing to sabotage American democracy so they get to forestall they day they have to pay their taxes, change our country’s energy usage to minimize the effects of global warming, be more or less civil to people who aren’t white Christian evangelical rich people, give up the right to recklessly build private arsenals, or have the police shoot black people for trivial and/or invented offenses, or accept that people will want to move to the US as long as we keep employing undocumented workers. The man of the year appears to be spite.

 

In other news…

Yeah I can’t think of anything to post that isn’t better covered elsewhere, or really fucking depressing. And recent events that may or may not rhyme with schmivorce, mean I am in the market for a new vehicle unless I want to commute 20 miles each way on my 10 year old Ducati through a Wisconsin winter*. Having said that, the villa of reduced circumstances is 4 miles out of a not very big town in the middle of the woods up a steep gravel driveway, so all wheel or 4 wheel drive is a must. My budget is $25,000 for a new vehicle or $20,000 used. Any suggestions? Or talk about your favorite car from back in the day or your coolest driving story. Happy Thanksgiving.

*I don’t