Furrygate: The Furrying
It’s been a rough week for Dan Riehl, Steve Gilbert and their fellow dumpster-diving, countertop-appraising Stinkertons. In pursuing the riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma that isn’t the military record of Barack Obama’s great-uncle, they’ve had their ears boxed by a WWII vet, been easily proven wrong in their speculative fantasies and come this close to breaking bread with Holocaust deniers as they parsed the differences between stops on the Nazi roadmap to the Final Solution.
It really couldn’t get more embarrassing for these people, could it? Well, it could, but we’d have to imagine a twist to this story so far-fetched as to beggar belief. Like, say, if the eager investigator on Gilbert’s ‘Sweetness and Light’ blog who sent harassing emails to WWII vet Ray Kitchell and his son Mark:
—– Original Message —–
From: cigarskunk
To: [mark kitchell]
Sent: Wednesday, May 28, 2008 6:38 PM
Subject: Searching for Charles W PayneDear Sirs,
In light of the recent controversy over the military service of Barrak Obama’s grandfather, Charles W Payne, I was hoping to contact you to get some kind of verification of his membership in the 89th.
I’ve checked the records of http://www.kshs.org/genealogis…..p;branch=N and they only list him as being in the Navy.
I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
Thank you in advance!
From: [Mark Kitchell]
To: cigarskunk
Subject: Re: Searching for Charles W Payne
Date: Wed, 28 May 2008 18:52:48 +0200You are the one who is lying. Mr. Payne served in the 89th Divison, 355th Infantry Regiment, Company K.
…Turned out to be a sexual fetishist who regularly commissions artwork of himself as a cigar-chomping skunk getting its knob sucked by a menagerie of voluptuously drawn cartoon rabbits, gophers and other assorted mammalia. If he turned out to be a regular attendee of ‘furry’ gatherings so desperate and noxious in his social interactions that members of that oft-maligned subculture shunned him as a pariah.
Which is preposterous, of course. There’s just no way a person like that could be one of the leading figures in the Wingnutosphere’s ongoing Great Uncle investigation. It would be far too surreal if… Wait, what’s that you say?
No, you must be jok-
OMFG. You are fucking kidding me.
Above: Art hiked from Crush Yiff Destroy
(h/t: Archer 813 in comments.)
Gavin adds: Props and apologies to our furry commenters Cargo and Simba. From Crush Yiff Destroy comes an encomium, excerpted below:
In August, Cigarskunk came to CYD in order to assert his heterosexuality and to explain why the furries hated him: He was 100 percent straight, he smoked, he was conservative, and he brought females to conventions, because he was not gay. He stated, restated, and then stated some more that he really loved women and was totally straight, and then went on to call everybody else gay. Literally; he responded to every negative post by calling the poster a closet homosexual or a homophobe, and he did so in the kind of haughty manner that makes you want to plunge your hands through your computer screen and wrap your fingers around the throat of the person on the other side.
After babbling endlessly that he wasn’t gay and everyone else was, Cigarskunk began to ramble about cigars and how great they were. It was fetishistic: “Cigars, cigars, cigars, by God, I love cigars. My favorite color is cigar-brown. Cigar smoke, cigar smell, cigar taste; cigars are fucking great. I really, really like cigars. Cigars make my day. Cigars have a Zen-like quality to them, and they’re so damn good. Ooh, yes, cigars. I think about cigars all the time. I fucking love cigars.”
Rest assured, by the time his ass was banned in record time (after a mere 3 posts), everyone knew that he really, really, really loved cigars. Afterwards, Cigarskunk pounded out essays of staggering length, detailing how everyone at CYD was a lunatic and all the hate was heaped upon poor little him. Plus, cigars were great. Everyone pointed and laughed.
Oh please. Next thing you’re going to tell me is that Glenn Reynolds, the intrepid lawyer, citizen journalist, and macho firearms connoisseur is all into, oh I dunno…robot love, or something.
Bah. It ain’t kinky unless there’s two wetsuits and a dildo up the arse.
You know, when you’re way too crazy for the freaks that are into furries, it’s well past wetsuits and dildos levels of crazy.
Are you trying to tell me there is some sort of symbolism associated with a homophobic rat-winger who loves to suck on a cigar?
How incredibly accurate that he refers to HIMSELF as “a whore”.
WTF is it with these wingnutjobz? Is it really that cognitively painful to quit pretending you’re not a fur-lovin fag? He’s not a skunk, he’s a BEAR.
an open-minded, alt-lifestyle conservative who demands tolerance for his ‘beliefs’ and ‘life-choices’.
I am speechless.
In honor of Mr Kitchell, I offer this proposed response to trolls everywhere:
Pickbuttrickoff
Try it, with emphasis on the second syllable.
[For those with short-term memory issues or returning from a brief absence: PCBUTRYCOF — Please crawl back under the rock you came out from]
This is some top notch citizen investigative journalism.
I maintain that the cigarskunk emails are fadgeries.
I am a furry, longtime reader of S!N. Most of us are pretty liberal. But there’s a few… and cigarskunk is more of a loon than most.
You know, when I first read the name cigarskunk I thought about how appropriate it would be to add to the wignut help thread, but now I just want to point out three things:
1. Whatever weird perverted fantasies gets their rocks off, so long as only consenting adults are involved.
2. Although cigarskunk may have helped do the digging, the creepy littl freak isn’t the one who called a WW II vet a sheehanite or posted personal information about the Kitchells.
3. BWAHAHAHAHHAHA
Yeah, forget about, you know, all the evidence to the contrary which proves that Obama was NOT lying. He’ll settle for anyone, anywhere – even some homeless person – who will tell him what he wants to hear.
But what about teh children!?!?!? He’s a pedofurry!
Dude! What happened to the [NSFW] tag? Really, help us malingerers out here a bit more.
That said…
BWAAhahahahahaha!!! *gasp* HahahahaHAAAAhaaaa-aaaa…
*thud*
We have a WINNAH!
The competition was fierce. But we have a title holder for “Most Personality Issues Within a Single DNA Container.”
Give ’em a cigar… no wait.
Better not.
I’m still trying to maintain a reality wherein these type of people don’t exist.
I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking.
cargo and any others, I apologize in advance and retrospect. There’s no way I’m going to be able to not go for the funny.
This is the greatest thing ever. Thank you, Sadly, No! Thank you.
I think I see a CPAC Blogger of the Year Award in this guy’s future.
I took a gander of an actual pic of this ‘skunk’ guy and I must say, my penis just threw up.
Holy jeebus.
Oh dear god, don’t ever do that again without warning us. I’m gonna go wash my eyes out with bleach now.
Ahem:
lulz!
…that is all.
And many awards from National Review and think tanks.
Maybe he’ll get a fancy candlestick like Jonah.
You’d think this was all some elaborate prank, but in all honesty, who could make something like this up?
Wow, wow, double-wow and another furry wow because, well, just wow.
“I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
We call them “The Fighting Furballs.” Or, as Susan so astutely pointed out, rat-fuckers.
I see Cigarskunk has gone with Wild Cherry Pepsi instead of the usual wingnut beverage of choice. He’s out there.
Additionally, to prove my point for me, Glenn over at Instapundit is talking about attending some meeting about space issues and taking pictures of actual females at said event. Aaaaaand the beat goes on.
Years ago, when I still hung out on Usenet, it was discovered that one of the wingnuts who posted regularly to my favorite newsgroup also frequented alt.sex.colostomy. Until now, I considered her the end-all definition of “right-wing gasbag,” but God help me, I think Cigarskunk tops her.
So to speak.
And conservaties say they don’t like them there furriners. Little did we know.
I can’t deny it’s funny-even though some of my friends are furries. Sigh. Bless ’em.
But furries or not, they’re good folk. What they sure as hell are not is WWII-vet hounding, hate-mongering, slandering, holocaust-deniers.
Do you suppose they have partners with Muppet fetishes, or would that be considered crass commercialism?
I have never been so agog and aghast at the same time.
I’m agoghast.
Welcome to the 2008 Republican Convention, may I have your name and reservation number? Thank you, and what is your sexual perversion? Speak up! I can’t hear you. Oh, I see. Will you be requiring any live animals for that? Very good. I will put you in the “non-criminal” wing. It’s rather empty at the moment…
Susan of Texas – oh don’t worry – we’re used to it. We have been laughing at Cigarskunk for years.
And it is funny! Sex is funny in general. 🙂 Most of furry is hanging around with friends and sketching. It’s more just a geeky smart bunch of people to hang around with, many of whom have rather odd sexual imaginations. Annnd, yeah, some are wingnuts. But far far far more are moonbats. 🙂
The entire thing is fucking moronic- these brain-damaged scumbags don’t even know what they’re trying to prove.
I don’t understand furries and have little or no empathy for them, but I do feel bad that this piece of shit cigarskunk is going to be their public face for a while.
Sorry for the embarrassment, Cargo. I added an update.
Oh. My. Fucking. Christ.
still,
BWAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH….
HAHAHAHAHA….
hahahaha.
Sex is funny in general.
Now that I know it’s universal I think I can put all the laughter behind me.
I love hanging out with geeky smart people, so I can understand that. And your tolerance of the teasing is admirable. (So much so that I’ll refrain from the “coughing up a furball” joke I was going to make).
haha, Gavin! Thanks. 😀
I love S!N and have been reading you guys for years. There are more furries than you could possibly know, lurking in your IT departments and your datacenters. We are everywhere.
We are everywhere.
It would be so awesome to hire a gang of furries to beat up my enemies.
Susan of Texas – I am a weasel, not a cat!
Ok, not to sound narrow-minded or anything, but if there’s anything this sexual fetish for cartoon animals says to me, it’s this: we really are nearing the end of empire; decadence on this level suggests that far too many people have both too much money and too much time on their hands. I’ve got $100 that says you’d never find a subsistence farmer or hunter-and-gatherer with this type of fetish.
Also, no offense meant to sometime commenter Simba. The image, though of this guy in his skunk suit harassing Kitchell about his WWII brother-in-arms … is just mind-blowing. To say the least.
As a gay man who has had to endure being lumped with Larry Craig, I sympathize with our furry friends.
Is this a both/and blog, like Pandagon? Because if it is, then i don’t have to decide which disturbs me more: that this guy is pressing World War Fucking II vets to swiftboat Obama, or that he’s a right-wing fetishist who enables the sex police.
Also, on general principle, i find cigars gross.
Jennifer, humans wanting to take on the characteristics of animals is one of the oldest forms of artwork known. The hunter-gatherers were MORE furry than we are.
I’ve got $100 that says you’d never find a subsistence farmer or hunter-and-gatherer with this type of fetish.
Um, do you know farm kids? I confess I don’t know one with this fetish, but they fuck animals. The boys anyway.
Also given the way magical thinking works you doubt some shaman dressed as a bear fucked someone?
[Updated again, with a quote from CYD.]
The guy I shared a dorm room with junior year of college eventually shared it with a fellow who liked to sketch himself as a wolf with a massive package. He would then put these pictures up all over the room. The only time I visited, he had about 20 up.
I can appreciate the boldness, I guess, but…uh, no.
Looks like they’re trying to Swift-boat Obama, a scam that worked with Kerry because, as I’m sure you all know, Bonkerites pegged him as a liberal elitist intellectual and liberal elitist intellectuals have no cred as soldiers while Bush who evaded service is pegged as authentic everything.
If they don’t get Obama this time they will keep trying. What can Obama do to cut Karl Rove’s spore off at the pass? The Answer:
A public baptism in the Red River, Obama going full immersion while wearing a white shirt and black slacks, the preacher lowering him in face up, holding the back of his head and praying loudly some authentic sounding praises to the non-denominational Lord.
The media event of the century, delivering undenialbe cred and generating a wave of sympathy that will carry him to the summit of global power.
I’ve got $100 that says you’d never find a subsistence farmer or hunter-and-gatherer with this type of fetish.
You all are bloody lucky being mocked on the internet! I barely ever had enough stain to smudge a buffalo on a rock and I considered myself a king.
Being that I have a friend who’s on Second Life as a wolf, furries make me less antsy than they used to. As long as they aren’t EbonLupus.
I will never be OK with adult babies or babyfurs, though. Not going to happen.
Y’know, I’m all for making fun of this asshat for his idiotic position on Obama’s great uncle. I’m tickled to death that the 89th Infantry folks wouldn’t give him the time of day. Want to mock his wingnut ideology? Go to town!
But making fun of him for his (admittedly weird) sexual preferences? That comes too close to ad hominem for my taste.
As somebody above said, as long as it’s between consenting adults…
PS: Cargo, I salute you for being willing to argue for the other side.
There is nothing at all gay about a guy who can’t stop talking about how much he hates queers and how much he loves a cigar in his mouth.
I repeat, that’s not at all gay so stop saying that it is!
Well, Your Conscience, it would not be quite so mockable if he wasn’t also a troops-hating, Bush-loving, queer-hating right-winger who demands that others respect his alternative lifestyle.
“I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking.”
That needed a spew alert!
****************************************
“I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.”
OK. Let’s see proof that every one of his fucking elder male relatives served in battle. Every. Fucking. One.
No? None of my buisness?
FYYFF!!!*
With all of your reactions, I can’t wait to get home and see this. The first link is blocked by the proxy. Is it NSFW, because if it’s safe I can use the red LAN.
It is (I hope) like mocking Limbaugh for taking Viagra. ED’s not funny for guys with health problems, but I’m afraid that won’t stop me from calling him names like limp, flaccid, lackluster, and so on.
Fairy, there is an image or two in the OMFG link which are definitely not work safe, think Goatse… a small Goatse but it is there nonetheless.
That comes too close to ad hominem for my taste.
Ummm…this is S,N! Ad hominem mockery is why we come here.
Ad hominem mockery is why we come here.
I come to meet scat fetishists. I mean, for the poop jokes
Well, to be fair, there are a lot of other things I am sure have never occured to your average subsistence farmer or hunter and gatherer. Like going into therapy. The only people who have enough time to worry about why they aren’t as happy as they could/should be are those that have enough to eat and a roof over their heads. And a whole list of other things: radon gas, bicycle helmets, etc etc etc. But I still say all of this stuff falls under the heading of “irrefutable signs of the end of empire”.
I for one welcome our new furry overlords!
re: CYD update.
Anxiously awaitng the General’s letter of supprt to cigarskunk.
Heterosexually yours,
not even an mba
But I still say all of this stuff falls under the heading of “irrefutable signs of the end of empire”.
Sure. You expect your Defenders of Empire to be drawn from the pool of people who wouldn’t be burned at the state if the Empire had its way. Perhaps also from the pool of the smart and the capable, but I’m a dreamer.
state
Of course I meant steak.
‘stayKKK’?
Actually, I think you meant stake
*ducks*
*ducks*
It was my gift to you! Enjoy!
as usual, people misuse the term “ad hominem”.
clearly, what we have here is “ad animalem”.
to be specific, “ad mephitem”.
Incidentally, CYD is generally a bunch of dicks too, but even they make fun of Cigarskunk.
Actually I think pedestrian meant
*goose*
You know, I can live with the furry/cigar fetishes, but damn I hate grown men who wear jean shorts.
Next thing you know someone will be telling me that was actually Michelle Malkin in a feathered blonde wig playing the lead in “Farrah Fart-its.” Republicans are determined to ruin every kink out there by mere association.
Heh, yeah. I second everything that Cargo has said.
I’m a non-active member of the fandom (ie, I don’t go to cons or dress up) and a longtime reader of SN. And I know about this guy long ago. Douche.
But really, what a cliche; the massively hyprocritical, barely-supressed homophobic raging homosexual republican wanker/pundit trope, but at least the furry part spices it up a little so it doesn’t taste like a rerun.
As odd as furries seem to the rest of you, winger-furries seem odd to us (thats right-wing furs, not Winger-fans :P, inside jokes ftw).
I left a comment on his FurAffinity journal linking to this post.
Maybe he’ll come by and provide us with some amusement.
Furries abusing rodents? Say it ain’t so!
GC,
I believe there actually shants.
Here’s a helpful hint:
Shants are great for people who can afford shorts, but can’t quite afford pants. .
Linky no workee?
http://www.ghastlycomic.com/d/20051204.htm
WordPress ate my link. That’s from Urban Dictionary.
Sometimes a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar is just a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar.
He’s not a skunk, he’s a BEAR.
OK, pretty late to the reply to this comment, but this guy is a homophobic freak, not a bear. The gay bear movement does not have dressing up as furry animals as a defining trait (although there are probably bears in the furry groups). There are a lot of bears that are as freaky about cigars as this guy, but we don’t go visiting gay web sites and start calling everyone we disagree with conservitards, and he probably wouldn’t visit a bear website or gathering if his life depended on it. He would be a stand-out flake in any group. I hearby denounce and reject him as a bear. Yuck.
BWAHAHAHAHA!
That’s fuckin’ gold, man.
Jennifer, I think it comes back to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs — someone worried about digging up yams (physiological needs) isn’t going to bother with a lot of stuff like that (I think “dressing up as a skunk and getting a blowjob while sucking on a cigar” is somewhere between “love and belonging” and “self-actualization” but I’m not really sure). Probably farmers don’t have drawing-cartoons-of-themselves-fucking-animals fetishes because, you know, “hey I have a farm, and on that farm there are some animals, and if I want to have sex with animals I can make that happen, what with the advantage of knowing how to close doors and such”.
It’s posts like this that make me want to hit the tip jar again. This is some high quality S,N!
If I may edit myself, I’m not calling him a freak because he’s a furry, he’s a freak for being a gay-obsessed homophobe. The kind that can think of no worse insult than to call someone gay. I really hate that crap.
Those interested in the outer limits of human depravity could do worse than read Suttree in which watermelon-fucking plays a crucial role. I look forward to Fruity conventions. Uh, not personally though.
By the way, this is his FA journal about the whole thing. I think you have to be registered to post comments, sadly.
If you think those e-mails were bad, imagine what a nuisance cigarskunk would’ve made of himself if Kitchell had been run over by one of those construction vehicles that repaint highway dividing lines while lying face-down dressed in black.
Le hiss!
From Simba’s link: “Obama has kept his grandmother under lock and key since the primaries started, preventing her from talking to the media at all.” THAT KIDNAPPING BASTARD! That does it, I’m voting for McCain, he only would’ve called her a cunt.
I honestly thought you guys were kidding at first. That is hilarious.
Funniest article ever about “furries”…
fucking pelicans
and skunks
and cigars
I can’t really add to the above snarkfest and Susan of TX’s one liners are about to kill me. But I just wanted to say that I keep two e-mail accounts. I got the second one because the username for the first one causes people to raise one eyebrow and look at me askance. Hence the second one that is just my first initial last name.
I would not send a complete stranger (and an elderly one at that) an e-mail from my personal use account because it would automatically piss them off, no matter what the content of the actual message. But then, I’m only an occasionally classy homo and not a fRightWing Virile Chomper of Cigars.
Also: Smoker’s Rights is the dumbest damn “issue” EVAR. I have never met a person who took this “issue” seriously who wasn’t a whiny assed wet shit. If I ever bitch about my RIGHT to smoke, you may assume that world peace has broken out, disease and suffering are no more and the Supreme Court has ruled that not only is every form of discrimination punishable by a punch in the face but members of groups that have suffered from discrimination must be given a million dollars.
And then someone please shoot me in the leg so I’ll have something real to bitch about.
Aaaand since nobody else has…
Fuck you, I’m a dragon!
I kid because I love.
This day is now officially better than 1000 Christmases.
Hey, could I get a third source to confirm that Obama is lying about this? Because those first two, y’know, didn’t.
I’ve always thought of cigars as breath fresheners for people who eat shit.
No, he doesn’t want to suck a dick, does he?
Sheesh.
.
We’re afraid. Very afraid.
Funny how you don’t hear anybody advocating for Farter’s Rights.
Oh yes you do!
Oh my god, this thread is hilarity overload. I can’t even deal with the heinous awful hilarity of it all. If you guys haven’t read the link to the “Encyclopedia Dramatica,” I highly recommend it. It contains choice excerpts like this:
Cigarskunk wrote his own Wikifur entry, where he took credit for single-handedly popularizing skunks in the furry community as if convincing a gaggle of mouth-breathing social retards to spank it to a new kind of rodent is some sort of accomplishment.
Cigar smokers don’t die. They just smell that way.
Sometimes a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar is just a guy dressed up as a giant skunk smoking a cigar.
Fantastic. Because, ya tool along thinking Freud was taking things waaaay out of context… and then there’s wingers. They are so completely Freudian I feel they must lead to a academic revival of his theories.
…or Masturbate in Public Rights.
or Blow Jobs in Men’s Rooms Rights. *tap tap tap*
…or Masturbate in Public rights.
Skewz me? Bill O’Reilly? Kristol? The entire rightwing punditocracy?
Okay, I apologize for trying to not think furries exist.
I just have this image of people getting it on in giant sweaty mascot suits, which doesn’t suit my palate.
No offense, fellow SadlyFurries. My loyalty to the community far outweighs my ignorance to alternative lifestyles.
JK47-
I clicked that link and saw no Encyclopedia Dramatica, but I did see this:
Words fail me…
If by god he really, really likes cigars, he might also consider really really liking, or at least acquiring a taste for, cancer of the lips, tongue, mouth, throat, esophagus, larynx, lungs, pancreas, and bladder. Not to mention heart attacks, vascular disease, and emphysema. If nothing else, the hospital stays will allow him time to draw his own skunk blowjobs.
“We cum in peace. We cum for freedom.”
I don’t know how anybody who likes to smoke cigars, ever gets any pussy without paying for it, in one manner or another – that is, either you’re rich and chicks like rich even if you’re a troll, or you have to pay a hooker to get near the va-jay-jay.
Those things STINK and they make your mouth and breath STINK.
I am so stealing that one.
Kielbasa, kielbasa, kielbasa, by God, I love kielbasa. My favorite color is kielbasa-red. Kielbasa smoke (the smoked kind anyway), kielbasa smell, kielbasa taste; kielbasas are fucking great. I really, really like kielbasa. Kielbasa makes my day. Kielbasas have a Zen-like quality to them, and they’re so damn good. Ooh, yes, kielbasa . I think about kielbasa all the time. I fucking love a kielbasa in my mouth.
Okay, obviously I’m not so hot at HTML. Let’s try this again:
Encyclopedia Dramatica.
Cigarskunk wrote his own Wikifur entry, where he took credit for single-handedly popularizing skunks in the furry community as if convincing a gaggle of mouth-breathing social retards to spank it to a new kind of rodent is some sort of accomplishment.
ALright. I’m going to have to leave work early. This is getting to be too hilarious.
S’allright, JK. That colon thing was too funny.
I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
Undead Irony has risen from the grave, thirsting for human blood!
I’ve always thought of cigars as breath fresheners for people who eat shit.
Hence they are de rigeur in the business world.
.
Speaking of
big brown dickscigars, Happy Suck on This Day everyone!Can you imagine someone trying to explain the concept of “furry fandom” to WWII Veteran Ray Kitchell?
In my non-smoker’s opinion, (good) cigars are marginally better smelling than cigarettes, but that is like saying cat shit smells marginally better than dogshit.
I had a landlord who smoked Swisher Sweets and the hideous stench used to come into my apartment and get in the curtains. He looked a lot like Cigarskunk. Probably a relative. Maybe even an uncle.
Look folks, it’s been fun, but this makes it clear where we need to go to meet like-minded perverts.
We’re going to Ace of Spades HQ, and then we’re swinging by the Free Republic, and then we’re gonna hit up Red State and TownHall. Those motherfuckers are down for some strange.
Adios muchachos.
humans wanting to take on the characteristics of animals is one of the oldest forms of artwork known.
I believe that this is central to your point.
Can you imagine someone trying to explain the concept of “furry fandom” to WWII Veteran Ray Kitchell?
He should have introduced himself that way in his letter. It probably wouldn’t have gone over any worse.
Funny how assholery can transcend communities. . . .
I love a sausage in the mouth as much as the next furry, but yeesh.
Remember, a sausage in the hand is worth two in the bush.
The internet is made of extra win today.
Claiming to have invented skunk fetishism is not only kind of sad but is also much like saying Miss Mam’selle Hepzibah never existed.
Or the Uncanny X-Men.
I like cigars, but only platonically.
It’s true though, many cigar smokers are bourgeois golf-shorts wearing Rush-wannabe asshats.
Or the Uncanny X-Men.
The bottom of that page asserts a link to Pogo.
I love how literal the handle “cigarskunk’ turned out to be.
When I worked as a bartender ages ago, there was an asshole who would come in and order a Crown & Coke and then pull out a Swisher Sweet. All this was done in a conspicuous manner, so that everyone would notice the classy dude who diluted his premium beverage with flavored sugar water and smoked candy-flavored cigars. How could we not be impressed?
It should go without saying that he was a lousy tipper.
Yeah, I dunno. For some reason, there’s a subset of furries who are about as misogynist, homophobic, racist, and crazy-libertarian as you can get (even the gay ones). I suppose the thinking is that their deviations are the only acceptable ones.
I love how literal the handle “cigarskunk’ turned out to be.
It’s like if I went around calling myself “lazyjerk”. How stupid would that be?
Hey, any Sadlys here around the Kansas City area? It’s Gay Pride Festival weekend. I’m going tomorrow, would love to meet up with anyone else around here! (Seriously, I would love to meet up with ANYONE around here who doesn’t go to “Jesus Camp”, Sadlys more than anyone else, as always.
“Funny how assholery can transcend communities. . . .”
Steve, you need to make up some t-shirts with that one. Brilliant, man.
How stupid would that be?
Stupid enough to pester an old veteren about a bunch of bull? Then stupid enough to get slapped around by a bunch of septuagenarians, and insist on coming back for more?
The bottom of that page asserts a link to Pogo.
Oh, no question – there’s otherwise no reason why a sexy skunk lady would be named Hepzibah.
I just meant, as far as wide exposure of the idea of a person finding a skunk sexually attractive, Chris Claremont and Walt Kelly both had cigarskunk beat by decades.
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. The key word here is “sometimes.”
I blame Hollywood.
hollywood
Seriously, I would love to meet up with ANYONE around here who doesn’t go to “Jesus Camp”,
Did I ever tell you all that I was the inspiration for that film? Well not really, but the preacher kid with the rat tail was my former pastor’s son and they shot the movie out of my old church.
Jim, not to mention Warner Bros.
Remember Pepe LePew, the cat-rapist?
Let’s face it, that skunk on Bambi?
H-A-W-T
Pepe LePew, the cat-rapist?
Prove it, SVU.
I don’t comment here, but I love Sadly, No! THIS MUCH for posts like this.
Also just because we understand CigarSkunk loves attention, he’ll be on display June 2nd and 3rd on the main page of ED.
xoxo
tfo
Those Cute Little Bearzie Wearzies
It’s like if I went around calling myself “lazyjerk”. How stupid would that be?
I have no idea what you mean.
Susan von und zu Texas…
I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking
… wins this thread and every thread that will ever be written in the whole future history of the intarwebs.
I’m not a furry, but I just realized that if I were, I’d want to be named Sir Ocelot.
Here we are at almost 150 posts, and I’m surprised no one pulled out this quote yet:
“Freud said sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Oh, yeah? Well sometimes it’s a big, brown dick with a white collar business criminal asshole sucking on the wet end of it.” — George Carlin
Sadly, No! is a bunch of lying liars; CigarSkunk made FOUR posts at CYD before he became too odious to tolerate… FOUR, not three! Why are you lying about his record?
I can now safely ignore your thesis and focus on your egregious mathematical errors. FOUR!
Furries schmurries. I’m more concerned about those Slimies who hang out at Pharyngula.
Gbear,
he’s a freak … that can think of no worse insult than to call someone gay
Oh, I don’t now, Gbear. It would be sort of a nice world if the worst thing one could say about another is that he’s gay!
Furries are cute.
Slimies, now, there’s a whole other story.
Which I can’t tell.
Slimies? Is that an amphibian fetish? Because if you ask me, salamanders are just asking for it with their bright eyes and their soft, supple skin.
And cephalopods? Mmmm, tentacles…
Annelida, Annelida men have named you
You’re so like the creature with the mystic slime…
Scum enchanted evening, you will meet a slime mold.
I’m guessing it’s more of a cephalopod thing, pedestrian. They do like their squid over in those parts.
And BTW pedestrian… all the other Boston Sadlys are sending me their e-mail addys… you don’t want to be left off of the cool kids list, do you? (e-mail to my screen name at mit.edu).
What would you call my fetish?
It occurs to me that Cigarskunk’s military enthusiasm might have been inspired by the Sensational Alex Harvey Band:
Did someone say, ‘goose”?
http://www.mongdori.com/forums/read.php?2,1313
“I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking.”
I don’t even know why there are any more posts. Susan of Texas totally won this round. Nothin but net.
What would you call my fetish?
Well, that gives ‘weiner-dog’ a whole new meaning.
What would you call my fetish?
I think I’d call it “Dick”.
I like anthromorphic animals in comics, even sexy ones like Omaha, the Cat Dancer. Acting it out in person is a little creepy, but hey in private between consenting adults … whatever floats your boat. I think it’s revealing that he’s an outcast even among the furries.
As always, i just want to point out that it’s not only the “right-wing-nuts” that are doing the finger pointing traitor-calling crazy making crap. Larry Johnson’s No Quarter blog went nuts over this and every other issue the right wing has… and they’re suppposed to be Democrats. Dunno what to say except the crazy is everywhere….
Slimies? Is that an amphibian fetish? Because if you ask me, salamanders are just asking for it with their bright eyes and their soft, supple skin.
Maybe Hugh7 or whichever one it was will drop by and inform us about his foreskin restoration system that utilizes the soft, supple skin of the salamander. Available in many different colors and patterns!!!
I wonder if Cigarskunk has ever gotten it on with his obvious kindred spirit, Dafyyd ab Hugh. I imagine the Wingnut Furry Blogger community must be pretty small, so they must have crossed paths at some sordid point.
I bet after sex they’d lie in plushy repose, smoking cigars and sharing a giant sammich.
My vote for most disturbing post and links this decade.
tontocal said,
May 30, 2008 at 21:44
I took a gander of an actual pic of this ’skunk’ guy and I must say, my penis just threw up.
As long as your penis didn’t throw up a little bit in your mouth you’re OK.
LA LA LA I CAN’T HEAR YOU LA LA LA
Okay, wait just a minute here. Do I understand that these people get dressed up like animals and then have sex with each other? Like that extra-creepy scene in “The Shining”? And they have conventions? Or do they just fantasize about themselves being cartoon animals having sex with anthropomorphically “sexy” other cartoon animals? Am I gettin’ this right? And then one a these critters actually rhapsodizes on about cigars while bashing gays and then Internetually harasses an octegenarian WWII vet? What in the HELL is goin’ on here?
And you know what else? This is one of the VERY few times since I entered geezerette-hood that I’m GLAD I’m old and don’t know what the h-e-double hockey stix this is goin’ on about!! GLAD, I tells ya!!
I pray for the sweet release of death.
By the way, it would be a nice thing if you obfuscated Kitchell’s email address in the blog post, so that spammers can’t scrape it off the page.
He’s already dealing with furries, no point adding injury to insult.
Remember the Monty Python skit about men dressing up as mice and having cheese parties?
I remember when I thought it was a joke.
fillerbunny! So nice to see that handle!
“The fire, it burns somehow.”
WereBear said,
May 31, 2008 at 1:42
Remember the Monty Python skit about men dressing up as mice and having cheese parties?
Yes, now that you mention it. They started the whole thing.
“He also begun publication of the furry fanzine, Skunk Aficionado, featuring 40+ full sized pages of art, comics and stories, as well as a full color 11×17″ centerfold…”
And at that point, that point, the internet was dead, as there was simply nothing left to say.
[Done!]
I am really, really, really sorry that the intertoobz ever taught me that a “furry” was some category of humans of similar interest who were common enough to rate frequent references by an abbreviated term in which common understanding of the definition was implied.
Just really, really sorry.
What would you call my fetish?
Arthur?
By the way, it would be a nice thing if you obfuscated Kitchell’s email address in the blog post, so that spammers can’t scrape it off the page.
And I would imagine the earlier post too.
Scum enchanted evening, you will meet a slime mold.
Species-ist!
who was it that said, “If the right wing ever got therapy, they’d cease to exist?”
I don’t know, but that’s brilliant!
I predict years and years of expensive Adlerian therapy.*
*MST reference
The creepiest fetish I’ve ever encountered is that one where people dress up in strange costumes, assemble in large buildings, and spend all day doing pointless, repetitive tasks.
You know what I think is just hysterically funny?
I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.
I’m just wondering what all those manly men in his family who bravely fought in all those conflicts would think about his furry proclivities. “Sweet savior on a stick, you mean I fought for this country and narrowly escaped death many times to protect my progeny’s right to beat it to Disney characters? What the fucking FUCK!!!”
why isn’t he following in the footsteps of his noble family men?
The military shaves your hair, and have you ever tried to get a date looking like a naked mole rat?
Safe for Canada!
Admissible:
1. Co-ed Sexxtasy V.2
2. Genus, No. 34
3. Here Come The Lovejoys
4. Maid in Heaven Supers VSOP
5. Secret Lovers
6. Skunk Aficionado, Issue 2
I think dressing up as a skunk qualifies you for a Section 8.
I think this is the same guy.
Snorghagen said,
May 31, 2008 at 2:00
The creepiest fetish I’ve ever encountered is that one where people dress up in strange costumes, assemble in large buildings, and spend all day doing pointless, repetitive tasks.
Why do you mock my life? Waaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!
He looks a lot like in this picture, so I think they’re both Sean Foltz.
Dammit, this is starting to cost me a lot of Diet Dr. Pepper as well as causing nasal pain! Seems to me this guy sounds like he should be a member of the White House press corps, or at least an unofficial member with a perpetual one-day pass and some occasional overnighters.
I think this is the same guy.
Many Bothans died to bring us this information.
Caerphilly a-Gogo
I am one of “those people”, and I would like to “thank” Cigarskunk for stuff like this:
and this:
Learn to keep your fandom affiliation where it belongs, and stop insinuating it into areas where it is not relevant. You’re making us look really really bad here, goddamnit!
This isn’t going to turn into Giant Sammch II is it? Because I refuse to apologize for hooting at those who know how much woolite gets fatty cum out of fun fur.
I just can’t.
Many Bothans died to bring us this information.
That article about Cigarskunk and Herb is fucking hilarious.
seriously. first i read the first paragraph. spit take. second para–spit take, cough, recover, spit take again, snarf. the update–snarf into a double spit take, soda back UP the nose and then snarfed. first comments led to some amount of vomit in my mouth. swallowed that, read cargo, felt bad, then boom, new update, blew a french fry on the way down back up into my nasal passage. got it out, thought a bit about this, spit take x3 followed by a hollow laughter that fed into a severe case of hiccups.
went to the wikifurry page. why, dear FSM, why? laughed so hard i peed someone else’s pants. spat johnny blue (probably 20 dollars worth) on my screen and keyboard.
overall, this thread has probably cost me 500 dollars and possibly my esophagus.
also, has anyone seen my sanity?
I feel like I am broken now. What is this strange world???
Your sanity is over in the corner, pointing and laughing.
Oh, MzNicky, furries are nice enough. They certainly aren’t worse than S&M aficiandos, and some of those bondage types make very good neighbors!
spat johnny blue
You drink Johnny Walker Blue?
Seriously?
I know not, but it is rich in funk and amply endowed with the perverse and the bizarre. Let us colonize this place, and let us celebrate by copulating in peculiar ways.
some of those bondage types make very good neighbors!
They never help out when you need it, though: “Oh, I’m pretty sure I’ll be tied up.”
Sure he pines to make love with small furry animals (or as if he were an animal? I’m still not clear on this) but at least he still supports W, the war and a tasty Cuban. Leave him alone you dirty fucking hippies.
Really. While I like to keep a bottle of 12 year Macallan around, I’m not the type to just casually sip Walker’s top label.
Well, lots of stuff here.
1. What would you call my fetish?
I wouldn’t I here it comes when you call.
2. spat johnny blue
You drink Johnny Walker Blue?
I believe that was an euphemism. Meaning he doesn’t swallow.
Please tell me this is coincidence and there are two Cigarpunks.
In a dystopian future, filled with totalitarian corporate profitocracies, the opressed have but one thing to call their own. An alternate universe of flavor country they reach by sticking flaming phallus in their mouths and suck as hard as they can. Escaping the drudgery of the everyday world into one where everyone wears leather pants and has a mohawk. It is this world that is the backdrop of the new science fiction genre cigarpunk.
The sky was the colour of a TV tuned to a show where everyon was smoking cigars.
It’s cigarskunk, so no. Somewhere on the CYD message forums, Cigarskunk says he is not a furry, “he just likes collecting furry art.” He collects furry art, goes to furcons, posts on furryfandom message boards. Not a furry.
Just like he’s not gay, despite waxing poetically about sucking on a
big brown dickcigar.The sky was the colour of a TV tuned to a show where everyon was smoking cigars.
That’s the beginning of a Bulwer-Lytton finalist, it is.
Mister DNA said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:19
It should go without saying that he was a lousy tipper.
No surprise at all. I should mention that the landlord in question ripped me off for the deposit my mother and I paid him, after she died suddenly of a heart attack when I was four months pregnant and unemployed. (For a while there, my life was like a good ole country song.) I had left the place much cleaner than I found it, too.
He died a couple of years ago. Even though the scurrilous wrong the old bastard visited upon me happened almost 17 years ago, occasionally I think about digging him up and pissing on the remains. Anyway, Cigarskunk’s resemblance to that rat-fucker makes me loathe this rat-fucker all the more.
He collects furry art, goes to furcons, posts on furryfandom message boards. Not a furry.
Maybe its the same thing that keeps Larry Craig from being gay: nobody ever taps back.
I suppose Mr. Skunk’s (snicker) objection is that he doesn’t dress up; he doesn’t have a fur suit. So, he’s not a furry, he just likes whacking to pictures of his favorite, Fifi Le Fume.
I wish I hadn’t clicked on those links because I had a nice meal planned and now I’ve lost my appetite.
What a sick fuck sad sack!
One more post from me. Skunky’s live journal is a thing of wonder.
Bitching about his job? Check.
Complaining about how stupid his bosses and coworkers are? Check.
Mocking his stupid, shiftless, lazy clients? Check.
The best part? He’s a social worker.
Wow! O_o
Just how deep does this rabbit hole of nutbuttery go?
That’s real, Johnny?
*clicks the link*
OK. I’m not a furry. Didn’t even know about them prior to some furry Dafydd sammich post from the Sadly Wayback Machine. But I am now officially chagrined on behalf of the furry community.
And what social services agency hired this fuck?
I get the impression he’s not so much a social worker as a welfare case worker but maybe he’s a social worker employed by the welfare office. It seems doubtful though from his journal posts. Social workers are usually required to have a master’s degrees and I don’t get the impression he’d qualify. He’s totally unprofessional. His journal is skating thin ice. If his employer found it, he’d probably be fired.
He comes across as a variation on the Newman character in Seinfeld, only with less charm and more viciousness. It’s obvious he has nothing but contempt for his clients.
btw, what’s a neocon doing working for “the county” anyway, in welfare no less? Shouldn’t he be self-employed or working in the private sector? I mean…you know.
You’re right, Lesley. Nowhere did I see it written that he is a social worker. My bad.
So, great thread or the greatest thread?
I will never be able to watch the ‘CSI’ ‘Fur and Loathing in Las Vegas’ episode again without thinking about this thread. I thought it was a joke.
The more I read this skunk the more I want to find out what county he’s in and report him. He should be fired. Client confidentiality is sacred and he is describing and mocking individual clients on his case load. It’s also obvious that he is a vindictive sort who takes pleasure in demeaning and abusing people.
I’ve worked with and know people who investigate insurance fraud (what he accuses many of his clients of doing) and the one thing they can’t do is talk openly about their cases. He’s not exactly doing the fraud department any favours either. The guy is a total classless moron. Obviously someone who feels powerless in his life and takes it out on other people. He’s classic.
And then the producers of CSI make TV shows about them.
I don’t think that’s a good thing.
pedestrian,
Actually, that line was almost a triple crown winner.
No common thread can ever approach the majesty of a Bert Prelutsky thread.
Does thinking Jessica Rabbit was kind of hawt as a young boy make one a furry? I’m just asking for a friend you understand.
Really.
I would say that I feel almost hip and old school here, if knowing about furries in 1992 could possibly make one hip and old school. Some friends and I put on a few regional science fiction conventions in the early nineties, and we had a few furryfans attend once or twice. This was before the internet enabled them to find each other en masse, when they were still an identifiable subgroup of Greater Fandom. I suppose they still are; does anybody know if the furries still attend WorldCon and WesterCon and like that?
Roger Rabbit as teh hat = furry
Jessica Rabbit as teh hawt = not furry, just furry chaser.
Roger Rabbit as teh hat? A rabbit fur hat, I suppose.
This has to be some kind of harmonic convergence of post/thread greatness.
It has unleashed a nuclear reaction of punchline fractals that multiply and continue to infinity.
Could I possibly add anything?
Furgettaboudit.
Typnig while trying to muddle mint for julep.
Oh gah, he’s got a post up there with photos of some girl he’s hooked up with holding a stuffed animal Pepe Le Pew.
Well, I had orignally thought cigarskunk wasn’t as bad as DANEgerus (man that fucking shitbag still gets me mad) but that post is fucking sick. I hope he gets a chance to revel in all his fantasies except that he shoves the skunk in his mouth and the burning end of the cigar on his cock.
Thanks not evan an mba! I’ll, uh, pass that along to my friend. Probably won’t be the first time he’s been told that he’s a chaser.
That was a whole shitload of rat-fuck, Candy. Fuck that fucker.
Wow. Now I’m kind of bothered about my somewhat anthropomorphic screen name. Rest assured I’m not going to be questioning anyone’s sexuality, and I do not like cigars, and I don’t want to commission pictures of myself as a toad getting . . . whatever a toad does done to . . . I just can’t even finish this sentence. It’s like another fucking brick in a wall that shoulda never been built.
Yep, he works for welfare.
He’s going to collect a handsome pension when he retires…at the tax payer’s expense. I have nothing against that, but he should because he’s a neoconservative.
Nice friends Dan Riehl has. Riehly.
fool
Dear Flying Spaghetti Monster, make it stop.
I don’t dare click on the links.
What if it turns me off sex? Stuffed animals? Fleece pullovers?
How could I explain it to a therapist?
I’m having a hard time reconciling “I’ve always been a rather compasionate and helpful person” with just about everything else this person has written and done.
I’m going to wake up tomorrow with a bourbon hangover because I drunked toos muchness to get this fuckwad out of my head.
Fucking “bad personal choices and employment issues” means unemployed deadbeat. Your mother having cancer is not why you had financial issues. The reason is because you’re a dick.
OK now I have visited sites with names like “Crush, Yiff, Destroy” and I am asking someone to help me burn my eyes out of their sockets. Only then can I unsee what I have seen. Unknow what I have known.
I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the term rat-fucking.
“Muskrat Love” sounds far more romantic.
Is no-one here going to own up to having sexual fantasies involving pinnipeds? I am waiting for an opportunity to sing “You Walrus Hurt the One you Love”.
Damn, it doesn’t get funnier than this.
Sing your heart out, Smut. Meanwhile, I’ll be watching Al Pacino and Ellen Barkin in “Seal of Love.”
Oops, did I just overshare?
Sun Tzu told us to know our enemies.
Skunks are crepuscular although the example we’re dealing with is more crapuscular or maybe just pustular. Fewer than 10% survive more than three years, so he’s a wily one to have reached twelve times that. They are also carriers of rabies but that’s one of those lay down with dogs like the ones at SweatyPenis Blight, you get up with neuroinvasive viruses types of things.
But the line from the wiki page that appears most fadgetastically apt is
In settled areas, skunks also seek human garbage.
“It looks like you’ve blown a seal.”
“Leave my personal life out of it and just fix the damn thing.”
Thanks SM, that helps me get past this unpleasantness. Ellen Barkin is ten gallons of sex in a very shapely five gallon jar.
There’s a joke here about Barkin up the wrong tree, but I rilly rilly don’t want to go there.
“Gary” has been strangely quiet this thread. Maybe it hit too close to home!
and yes, this is the greatest SN! thread only.
My personal version of the Great Seal… let me show you it.
What if it turns me off sex? Stuffed animals? Fleece pullovers?
Look Back in Angora.
“Gary” has been strangely quiet this thread. Maybe it hit too close to
home!
His fur has been ruffled?
or maybe he has feathers…
The furry thing always seemed pretty weird to me, but hey, whatever, as long as they don’t do it in the streets and frighten the horses.
On the other hand, I think it should be legal to shoot cigar smokers on sight.
My eyes! The goggles do nothing!
Best. Thread. Ever.
or maybe he has feathers…
on account of being a chickenhawk?
Johnny Coelacanth: Cigarskunk self-describes as a social worker, which makes his taunting of his mentally-ill clients as described in his livejournal all the more despicable.
I’d like to ask super-strongly that nobody do anything that might possibly endanger anyone’s job or real-life security in any way.
Cigarskunk might be an epic jerk online, in the context of posting things on the Internet, but I don’t think it’s up to us to judge from his scribblings whether or not he’s a good person in actual real life.
And that sort of thing is really hard to put back in the bottle once it leaks out. D’you know what I mean?
…Otherwise, BEST THREAD EVAR!!!1!!
I too was convinced that the reference points were merely rather hyperbolic satire of the kind that “Sadly, No!” is justly revered for … & then I opened the links. Oh. My. Fucking. GAWD.
Never mind posting political commentary – how does this person show his face in public? Not for the wingnuttery OR the furryism, but for BOTH these patently incompatible, er, traits AT ONCE? Dude must need a Kevlar toupee to keep his cranium from becoming an action-painting.
Gentlefolk, this IS the perfect post.
We can now close the Internets.
The sky was the colour of a TV tuned to a show where everyon was smoking cigars.
Hehehehe. That first line of Neuromancer is the most amusingly outdated line in all of sci-fidom, now that dead channels on TV look like the sunniest brightest blue you can possibly imagine.
It was an excellent line in 1983, though.
Oh, & if the /b/tards think he’d make a good “lulzcow” & that it’s milking-time in the barnyard, I pity his doomed pasty ass — no, wait, on second thought, I don’t.
’d like to ask super-strongly that nobody do anything that might possibly endanger anyone’s job or real-life security in any way.
message taken and seriously I wouldn’t have, but ooooooooooh I hope one of his clients cottons on one day.
this is a great find and a super thread but the best one for me is the WWII man kicking those lamers back under their rocks. Of course, this one is the sequel to that one. Who knows, there might be a third movie coming up. We can only hope there’s less skunk involved.
That was a whole shitload of rat-fuck, Candy. Fuck that fucker.
Thanks, MileHi. Wasn’t one of the best times of my life, fer sure. There’s more to the story, but I don’t want to sound like “everyone done died and I lost my pickup and muh dawg too. . . ”
but ooooooooooh I hope one of his clients cottons on one day.
Lesley, I really don’t believe in Karma, or any sort of woo for that matter, but maybe in Skunkie’s case he’ll get what’s coming to him some day. One can only hope. It’s pretty sickening that someone who is supposed to be helping people in desparate circumstances feels free to make fun of them and mock them publicly.
I’m going to go to bed now and cry myself to sleep with self-pity about not being able to go to Portland for the Sadly meet-up. And for some reason I now have “Please Come to Boston” playing away in my head.
Yeah, I’m with Lesley. He hasn’t posted to the livejournal in 88 weeks, so now it’s an internet artifact and I feel no remorse in linking to it.
Despite the fact that the nasty little prick puts his home town and job description on his LiveJournal, AND despite the fact that DramaWiki knows his True Name (which would scare the shit out of me; those motherfuckers are vicious), I couldn’t be bothered to contact his employer. Someday, one of his supervisors will Google his name. Karma is vengeance enough.
Oh my,
Sometimes you think you have a good take on the internets, and then you realise that, my oh my, there are so many corners that you don’t know in the slightest, and are now sorta kinda wishing you still didn’t know existed.
(NB: not aimed at furries, but rather the whole /chan/ thing, which just odds me out.)
FTW, indeed.
Ahem, I know what you mean. A surprising number of internet memes have come out of those corners, including our beloved lolcats and rickrolling. I discovered that particular rabbit hole a while back, but I don’t hang out at any of the /*/ boards because they make me feel old.
[crotchety]What the hell are you kids jabberin on about with yer anons and yer newfags and btards?[/crotchety]
Johnny, he’s still shitting on his clients in his current journal, not as frequently but it’s obvious his skunky stripes haven’t changed.
(apologies to skunks, which are rather cute. and no, I’m not a furry, just a normal healthy animal lover.)
skunk pins?
I’m drunk and busy making dinner for ‘Ho so excuse me if this has been covered.
Tink9+ sez he misspelled ‘Pittsburg[h]’ on his blog page. Can he be that stoopid?
Candy, the guy who manages my building sucks big time too and the property management company won’t fire him. They say they want to but their afraid he’ll take them to the Human Rights Commission. God, if there was ever a loser it’s him. Some of us are praying he gets oral cancer (he smokes like a chimney) so we can be rid of him. This is terrible to admit, especially in light of the fact that my mom died from oral cancer. But I’ve come to hate this motherfucker. He breaks and enters into people’s apartments, he’s a pathological liar, bilks immigrants (who don’t know their rights) out of money, intimidates women, mutters “fuck” under his breath all the time in front of tenants. One time and I shit you not, he left feces on the floor in the lobby and then left for the weekend. At least we suspect it was him because he’s done other egregious things to tenants over the years because he hates his job and hates tenants. (Example: he left a note on the elevator across from an old woman’s apartment that it would be broken for a month and she’d have to take the stairs. Later he claimed it was a joke.)
He’s a total scumbag loser fuckface and I want him to diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie. 🙂
they’re, not their…drat.
The more I read this skunk the more I want to find out what county he’s in and report him. He should be fired. Client confidentiality is sacred and he is describing and mocking individual clients on his case load. It’s also obvious that he is a vindictive sort who takes pleasure in demeaning and abusing people.
Its like than asshole ‘Five feet of Fury’; she works in welfare in Toronto, and mentions (or used to anyway) various cases in a very identifiable way, evil & illegal.
As for the furries, tis nothing, how about the ‘dolphin masturbators’, the sick fucks. (google fungi, if you dare)
lobbey, if you mean Kathy Shaidle, she never worked for welfare. She was lived on welfare benefits for four years.
strike “lived” or “was” – geez, I must be tired this evening.
um, http://whateveritisimagainstit.blogspot.com/2008/05/better-killing-through-technology.html
Jennifer wrote
“Fuck Omaha Beach, turn this landing craft around and head for fucking Anaheim. We’re gonna nip this shit in the bud.”
not even an mba said,
May 31, 2008 at 5:03
Thanks SM, that helps me get past this unpleasantness. Ellen Barkin is ten gallons of sex in a very shapely five gallon jar.
Not even an mba, I agree, and I’m boringly heterosexual. Anyone who’s watched Siesta or The Big Easy can probably guess why. Hell, even Switch, which is technically a comedy but full of Barkin-y goodness nonetheless.
Furries, well, wotthehell, archy, provided it’s between consenting adults, whatever floats your boat. I have my own peculiarities. But Bush-fandom, ew, yuck, with extra yuck and a big ladle of yuck on top.
yes, it was her I meant. I know she lived on welfare, but she also worked for some kind of government agency for a while (something to do with immigrant settling or something) about a year or so ago. Some of the comments on her site seemed to reflect this, although thinking back now, its perhaps not so clear cut.
However, doesn’t stop her being a hypocritical, racist asshole……….which was not central to my point.
They show this episode every year at the local furry con. You can hear the laughing on the other side of the hotel. They sell “PAFcon” shirts, too.
“I’m having a hard time reconciling “I’ve always been a rather compasionate and helpful person” with just about everything else this person has written and done.”
Maybe he meant “in the context of furred and felted Americans”.
the country needs a stuffed animal abuse hotline.
remember when you were a kid and projected feelings on to your teddy bear? like it might feel cold so you put a blanket on it? now imagine it being abused by the likes of skunkypants.
the thought of adults jerking off on kids toys makes me feel slightly ill.
ere’s no reason to mock him for his career when there’s this …
“the clove cigarettes I’m known for”
“the clove cigarettes I’m known for”
He has surrendered any modicum of respect.
I apologize if there are a whole mess of folks firing up their cloves right now. But I smoked clove cigarettes when I was a freshman in college, and I was a pretentious prick when I was a freshman in college.
(whaddaya mean “was,” Jim?)
I think this puts to rest any doubt as to whether he means “Swisher Sweets” when he says cigars.
I think it puts to rest any question as to his “toughness” too.
“the thought of adults jerking off on kids toys makes me feel slightly ill.”
So, this would be a bad time to evoke an image of Ann Coulter playing hide-the-crucifix with the George W. Bush action figure?
“So, this would be a bad time to evoke an image of Ann Coulter playing hide-the-crucifix with the George W. Bush action figure?”
Oh hell, she probably uses one as an IUD.
The George Bush Action figure is the exclusive toy of adult male wingnuts like Ace and Confederate Yankee.
Oh hell, she probably uses one as an IUD.
Big mistake, since nothing George has ever worked.
er, make that
big mistake, since George has never worked.
Damn, I’m off my game.
“Damn, I’m off my game.”
It’s the cigar fumes and skunk funk, gnawing away at yer brainz.
heh.
many of us leeberal folk experience a lot of self-doubt.
it’s reassuring when you discover that you could be that guy and he has no self-doubt or even a modicum of shame.
yeah, i think i’ll sleep like a baby tonight.
All I can say is:
LOL…hyuk!!!1!
Lesley wrote: “Big mistake, since George has ever worked.”
Well, neither has Coulter’s uterus.
George is up there as sort of a cargo cult thing.
Thanks for the great post ;D
comment
comment
No. I won’t.
….damn, you got me!
Jon H.:
Great.
Now I’ve got a mental image of Geroge Bush in his commander codpiece uniform residing at the entrance of Ann Coulter’s uvula, firing off his machine gun or swinging a sword at all the little spermatoza floating by, like Raquel Welch in Fantastic Voyage fighting off those white blood cell anti-biodies.
You bastard.
.
It’s probably too late to work this into the main post, but it must be seen to be believed. One of the latest ‘artwork’ submissions posted on the Skunk’s FA site:
Prepare fur a sprayin’ boy!
God help us all.
.
This can’t be fur real.
Hmm, that link to “Prepare ur a sprayin’ boy!” didn’t work right. Here’s an unembedded link:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1324868/
There is just too much strange in the world. I said this in the next thread up, but let me repeat it here:
What kind of twisted God pours a furry and a bigot into the same soul? That’s just cruel.
Now I’ve got a mental image of George Bush in his commander codpiece uniform residing at the entrance of Ann Coulter’s uvula, firing off his machine gun or swinging a sword at all the little spermatoza floating by, like Raquel Welch in Fantastic Voyage fighting off those white blood cell anti-biodies.
JGabriel,
Either you need to reacquaint yourself with the location of the uvula or you are in bad need of a crash course on human reproduction!
You fluffy fuckers.
Let us say that you’re a guy who’ datin’ a woman who’s totally into stuffed animals. She’s got the Care Bears and their goddamn cousins.
the goddamn cousins of care bears. now there’s an image.
I bet Cheney’s a furry. With a big Gund in his man-size safe he visits after office hours. Someone tell the Daily Show. They can include it in their next You Don’t Know Dick episode.
what in god’s name is going on here?
Incontinentia Buttocks:
Dude, you are so right. Fucking brain farts. Obviously I meant uterus.
On the other hand, the idea of a miniature George Bush hanging around at the back of Coulter’s tongue defending the palatine uvula is pretty funny too.
.
On the other hand, the idea of a miniature George Bush hanging around at the back of Coulter’s tongue defending the palatine uvula is pretty funny too.
I think the Palatine Uvula is a place in Rome.
This whole concept of a surrealist, politicised version of Deep Throat is weirding me out.
(You’ll have to excuse me, I don’t know how to do those nifty quote-blocks here.)
jim:Gentlefolk, this IS the perfect post.We can now close the Internets.
It is now safe to shut down your internets.
fupDuck:I will never be able to watch the ‘CSI’ ‘Fur and Loathing in Las Vegas’ episode again without thinking about this thread. I thought it was a joke.
I thought it was a coyote…
JGabriel:Now I’ve got a mental image of Geroge Bush in his commander codpiece uniform residing at the entrance of Ann Coulter’s uvula, firing off his machine gun or swinging a sword at all the little spermatoza floating by, like Raquel Welch in Fantastic Voyage fighting off those white blood cell anti-biodies.
You bastard.
No, he just stands on top of the pregnant belly giving a thumbs up and saying, “Mission Accomplished!”
_____________
And now, my own thoughts. Warning, they’re going to be scrambled all to heck, because it’s 6:15 AM and I haven’t slept yet.
I’m a fur. I admit this. I’m even a skunk. But for the love of all that is holy, this guy has problems. I mean, my elementary school barred me from attending 6th grade unless I was seeing a psychologist, and I’m saying this guy has problems. (It’s a long story, but a good deal of it came from the fact that my teachers had not seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail, or other movies I referenced.)
The “fandom” is… well… It’s pretty unique, I guess. It takes all kinds. And probably because the one “unifying characteristic” is about as unifying as creating a fandom around everyone whose names begin with a certain letter. You get left wing and right wing. You get well-adjusted, rational people, and you get total fruitcakes like Mr. Cancersticks here. You get mentally healthy people, and you get the kind that have to display everything to everyone and shove it in everyone’s faces.
Part of the problem is that you get people like this, who run around screaming about their fetishes, and that’s what catches the eye of the people, because it’s easy to digest. “Hey, wow. That guy’s pretty sick.” It’s noticable. And there are a few… There are some… Okay, there are a LOT of furs who need to learn about things like, “tact”, “decency”, and “not humping legs in public”. A good entry point into understanding this behavior, is that they spend their lives being ostracized for being a fur, and like a spoiled child, decide that they’re going to “really give them something to complain about”, it would seem.
So, yeah, the fandom has problems. But they’re being blown way out of proportion, which exagerates the problem, which feeds into itself, and it’s really a viscious cycle. (Not a small number of people joining the fandom do so because they find it easier to express their perversions they brought in from outside, after hearing what “sick freaks” are there.) Another part of the problem is that, considering the negative attitude towards furs, many feel the need to “band together”, as well as idealistically providing a “safe haven” for people who were attacked like they were.
I could ramble on for hours, probably, but I think I’ll just stop myself here and cut to the chase. People need to chill out. On both sides. The people that wear “anatomically correct” fursuits to the mall (I hope I’m making this up, please don’t let this actually be happening… Oh, I’m sure it is, somewhere. >.< ) and the foaming-at-the-mouth /channers who keep attacking (and claim to hate us so much, yet they always have new pictures to post and complain about, and always seem to be joining furry community sites, and browsing artwork…?) for whatever reasons they have. Just sit back, chill out, and go their separate ways. The internet IS big enough for all of us.
We now return you to your previously scheduled LOLcats. ^_^
So this means that every group forms a winger subculture.
This has sociological implications.
We must look at controlling them. A perpetual Winger Control program that gently explains their behavior is, indeed, the very definition of Unhinged.
We want to help them.
ahhhhhh my brain so many things I never needed to know.
“part of me is gone, part of me is gone forever” – Crow T Robot
From his LJ profile:
I’m a rather laid back gent
Boy did I read that wrong the first time. “You’d rather do WHAT?”
WereBear:
That would make Gary Ruppert a subculture of one.
I can live with that.
.
So this means that every group forms a winger subculture
Even the ones that are the stereotypical targets of winger hate.
Remember Alberto “I don’t know if my dad was here legally or not” Gonzales
Log Cabin Republicans
Mike “raining oreos” Steele or frickin’ Clarence Thomas
And that’s the ones that are open about their membership in both their identity group and the crazed right wing end of the spectrum. Maybe it’s a Judas goat thing, they feel they can be useful rounding up others to toil in the vote caging mines.
Maybe it’s a what what thing?
Either you need to reacquaint yourself with the location of the uvula or you are in bad need of a crash course on human reproduction!
I was sort of hoping he’d found a subtle way to call Ms. Coulter a cocksucker.
so, they laugh at my cigar, will they? i’ll show them! i’ll show them how many cigars the joker can smoke!
Ok, so I now have an image burned onto my retinas that will torture me for all eternity.
New meaning to the phrase hand-rolled cigar.
So the hot topics at S,N! are Creed, Iris, and people who want to fuck animals. If only all three could be included in one post, a perfect storm of “oh snap”.
Circumcision, Ruppert, Circumcision of Ruppert.
Donuts, Scarves, Scarves with Donuts on them.
And a big back of boners.
big bag of boners. Wow there’s a boner for you.
I am now officially surprised. I did not really think this could be possible anymore.
A commenter on Gilbert’s website has uncovered an additional, presumably damning fact about Mark Kitchell.
He MAY be the filmmaker responsible for the Oscar-nominated documentary, BERKELEY IN THE SIXTIES.
Or he might just have the same name. Who knows? They seem to think this is significant over there.
My father and I have chosen not get get involved in the various blog discussions.
However, I do think its important to state I am not the same Mark Kitchell who is a filmmaker.
MRK
Thanks for stopping by, Mark. As you can see, we have a large variety of blog discussions at S,N!
Okay, the cigars are bad enough, but clove cigarettes too? Great googly moogly!
“The sky was the perfect untroubled blue of a television screen, tuned to a dead channel.” Neverwhere, Neil Gaiman, 1996 or 1998.
I misremembered it as being from Neil Stephenson’s The Diamond Age but there you go — thanks, Ten Seconds On Google.
I don’t think that smoking cloves is:
(a) something to be proud of, or
(b) something you would be “known for”, in a subculture that overlaps with Ren Faire and Rocky Horror and S&M.
You can tell there’s a con going on by the big cloud of Djarum outside the hotel, now that they’re mostly non-smoking.
That said, I’d rather be around four dozen weirdos smoking cloves than one smoking a cigar.
“Cigars, cigars, cigars, by God, I love cigars. My favorite color is cigar-brown. Cigar smoke, cigar smell, cigar taste; cigars are fucking great. I really, really like cigars. Cigars make my day. Cigars have a Zen-like quality to them, and they’re so damn good. Ooh, yes, cigars. I think about cigars all the time. I fucking love cigars.”
How obvious does it have to be. This man loves having a large brown cylindrical object between his lips and and the same time he insists loudly to everyone within ear shot that he is definitely, absolutely, positively, most assuredly 100% heterosexual.
Methinks the lady doth protest too much…
Neverwhere, Neil Gaiman, 1996 or 1998.
I should have known somebody clever like that would have pointed it out long before I did.
On topic-ish, I think there needs to be some sort of rule proposed, like Godwin’s Law but lower-key, that says that the probability that any blog, regardless of its subject matter, will have a post about furries approaches 1 the longer the blog exists. Or something.
About a year ago, even The Comics Curmudgeon got into a big furry-related discussion, culminating in the immortal comment: “Remember the world before the Internet? I remember it as a time of innocence, when it would never occur to us that somewhere, someone is beating off to Slylock Fox.” –Rocky Jones
I used to smoke cloves when I was in high school, way back when I figured nothing says cool like smelling like a ham.
How does one evolve into “a fur”? I’m at a loss to understand this predilection.
“The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.” – Neuromancer, William Gibson, 1984
Comrade Rutherford: That was no lady; that was…well, it was certainly no lady.
Lesley, I don’t get it either, but then I don’t get much of anything anymore. Which is, increasingly, fine by me.
Lesley – see, this is why the fur thing freaks me out.
It’s not that these people empathize more with animals than humans. No, it’s that they are into cartoon animals. With big expressive eyes. It’s like some kind of infantile regression that got its wires crossed with the erotic circuitry. I mean, all fetishes are weird, but at least with the shoe guys it’s about an article of clothing associated with women. With the rubber guys and gals, it’s about rubber-clad humans. With the S&M crowd, it’s about human dominance hierarchies. All of those fetishes involve humans, at least tangentially. With the furs, it’s about make-believe creatures that have never existed. Which ranks it up there with Instadoofus’ Robot Love.
OT but ho lee shite!
From The Carpetbagger Report:
Sorry, it’s actually from TNR via CB
or maybe [Gary] has feathers…
No, hope is the thing with feathers.
The thing with feathers has turned to be my nephew. I must take him to a specialist in Zurich.
apparently there are furries who aren’t sexual.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Furry_fandom
It seems cigarskunk is a furvert The term furvert (a portmanteau of “furry” and “pervert”) specifically refers to the subgroup of the fandom that sexualizes anthropomorphic animal characters.
82% of respondents in a furry survey said they don’t own a fur suit (?)
Thanks for properly labeling those links with NSFW. I was really hoping to open up an image of a man spreading his asshole that wide.
With the furs, it’s about make-believe creatures that have never existed.
In stark contrast to the anatomical realism we encounter in mainstream p0rn.
Not being a furry, but rather a feathery, I can only quote the great Frank Perdue:
“It takes a tough man to make a chicken tender”
I was going to have some Skyy, but the port was the colour of a HD OLED display tuned to the intro from Streethawk.
My TV is the colour of a dead Sky channel.
Most fantasy-based kinks strike me as essentially harmless fun. The furry thing isn’t my cup of meat, but I don’t see any valid reason to object to it.
It’s those amoebas-in-latex fetishists that creep me out.
In a thread about one totally-not-gay-non-fur-owning furry, we get
1) a Sutree reference
2) an Omaha, Catdancer reference
3) a discussion about whether Gaiman, Gibson or Stephenson got ripped off by this furvert
Well played. Drinks for all.
And, just wondering. Cigarskunk claims to come from a family with a military tradition.
Anyone know how old he is and if he happens to have any anal cysts or whatever?
I bet he’d like a place that’s just looking for a few good men.
Most fantasy-based kinks strike me as essentially harmless fun. The furry thing isn’t my cup of meat, but I don’t see any valid reason to object to it.
It’s those amoebas-in-latex fetishists that creep me out.
Well, when I say “freaks me out” I don’t mean “hunt down the furries and KILL THEM!!” I mean, “gosh, that’s pitiful.”
Yeah, Joshreads is also acknowledging what we all are a little worried to admit, namely that Cassandra Cat is hot.
Okay, the cigars are bad enough, but clove cigarettes too? Great googly moogly!
The cigar cracks I can let go, non cigar smokers seem to get pretty worked up about it, irrationally so, I feel, but freedom of choice, and all that good shit.
But to align Clove cigarette smoking to deviant, dodgy, right wing behavior, well, its shocking. For a start it condemns the whole of Indonesia (the sweet smell of clove tobacco is the smell of the country), and compared to other smoke smell, is not too bad.
I, for one, welcome, our clove fag overlords!
Hey, what do you call gay amoeba oral sex?
Fagocytosis! HAW HAW!
Also parts of Indonesia smell like bananas, which they grow a lot of, so it must be kind of like being inside a big Belgian ale.
The San Diego Chicken gets me hot.
Joshreads is also acknowledging what we all are a little worried to admit, namely that Cassandra Cat is hot.
True. I loved how all that ended up over there, too, with the introduction of a T-shirt openly acknowledging that, drawn by Slylock Fox’s actual creator. History was made, if a very geeky nichey kind of history.
it must be kind of like being inside a big Belgian ale
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
The strange math of a furrier transformation?
Truth be known Cigarskunk is in the minority among furries. Considering most furries are left-leaning folks who raise money for animal charities and like the idea of human-animal hybrids, it comes as no surprise the furry-haters include the likes of Rush Limbaugh and George W. Bush.
Always interesting to see who people are rubbing elbows with.
You caught us. And we would have gotten away with our right wing bigotry if it weren’t for your silky, sable, rub-able elbows!
As though there weren’t already enough pile-on, here’s my attempt at a couple of clarifications.
The furry subculture, generally, has a case of the Geek Social Fallacies. Since the whole subculture doesn’t have any particular organization or hierarchy, the only way to exclude anyone is by massive social pressure – pressure that people are very reluctant to apply. The general attitude is “we’re a group who are frequently ostracized and demonized, therefore we shouldn’t be excluding people.” Even though it’s fallacious, that’s an argument with emotional strength. As mentioned earlier, the furry subculture is also diverse: “the one “unifying characteristic” is about as unifying as creating a fandom around everyone whose names begin with a certain letter” is a pretty good description.
With both of these factors together, the furry subculture can be a magnet for things that make the US’ mainstream culture twitch – or in more selfish terms, it’s got deviants I like and deviants I don’t like. Because of these social dynamics, even though it’s very obvious very fast that people like Cigarskunk and RHJunior and company are lunatics, there’s not really much one can do about it besides to keep insisting that they don’t represent the subcultures that they claim membership in any more accurately than they represent the macrocultures (Americans, Anglos, Earthlings) that they claim membership in.
Also, a couple of Prim Tut Tut Liberal things – come on, people, let’s stick to attacking fallacious and idiotic worldviews instead of personal peccadilloes. This is like the situation with Ann Coulter: just because she’s a torture-and-theocracy-advocating fascist doesn’t mean it’s okay to use sexist language about her. As well, Encyclopedia Dramatica and CYD, while full of lulz, are not really reliable sources. I’d say that they’re as reliable as Fox, but at least ED has the grace to tell you their agenda right away, which puts them ahead.
come on, people, let’s stick to attacking fallacious and idiotic worldviews instead of personal peccadilloes.
Fair enough. I agree with Snorghagen that: Most fantasy-based kinks strike me as essentially harmless fun. The furry thing isn’t my cup of meat, but I don’t see any valid reason to object to it.
Thanks for the Geek Social Fallacies link – as a lifelong misfit myself, I find that sort of thing very interesting.
Whatever two or more adults mutually consent to do is ok with me (even if some of it repulses or weirds me out). As long as children and animals aren’t involved, exposed to, or affected by it, and your noise doesn’t keep me up at night or disturb my “right to quiet enjoyment” you can wear all the fur you want.
What Snorhargen, SamFromUtah, and Lesley said. But I still think it’s pitiful.
This is beyond question the grossest thing I have ever seen on a political blog. (Well, maybe except for Jonah and the butt paste…)
In other words, expect blatant, biased lies, and expect boring truths to get deleted quickly.
If only Fred Hiatt at the WaPo would post so honestly.
Dang, Bitter Scribe, you need to get out more.
Hey Bitter Scribe, if you’re really looking for stuff grosser than furries, or Jonah and Butt Paste, you can always fire up Red State or Free Republic.
let’s stick to attacking fallacious and idiotic worldviews instead of personal peccadilloes.
I can handle people putting turmeric* in their personal peccadillo, but I reserve the right to criticise if they use brussels sprouts in the recipe instead of cauliflower. That’s just disgusting.
* Mustard, allspice, fennel seeds are all good. But don’t mention cilantro.
Hey, as a Proud Secular Humanist, I’m all about consenting adults and imaginary friends.
And, actually, anthropromorphic animals is far better than actual animals, and the Furries I know actually struck me as folks with a big helping of empathy and sympathetic ability. Which are not bad things at all.
No, what got us going on the fellow in question was, as always, the friggin’ hypocrisy.
He’s all about forcing people into predetermined categories and dictating their lives, yet he’s quite the unique individual, and these same rules don’t apply to him.
Will he ever be self-aware enough to ditch the self-loathing that seems to be the operating paradigm of Right Wingitude?
Will tokens like Michelle Malkin, Clarence Thomas, and the rest ever face the fact they have been used by people who stoke their self-loathing for nefarious ends?
Do they realize they are fated to descend into even more ridiculous caricatures of human beings?
Sadly, No!
Considering most furries are left-leaning folks who raise money for animal charities and like the idea of human-animal hybrids
And I laughed when George W. Bush came out in firm opposition to “manimals”.
Look, no opposition to furry sex, but Dr. Moreau isn’t exactly a leading a light in the Democratic Party. In fact, until now I thought he was purely fictional. I guess you learn something new every – say, I wonder if the Republicans have a “Most Dangerous Game faction…
Dr. Moreau isn’t exactly a leading a light in the Democratic Party.
Has Barack Obama sufficiently distanced himself from his earlier associations with an unrepentant vivisectionist and mad scientist?
Maybe you should ask Harry Whittington about the Most Dangerous Game.
ZING!
Earthworms are having sex in our side yard right now, among the spinach and peas.
Has Barack Obama sufficiently distanced himself…
Obama needs to denounce Dr. Moreau and his dastardly ilk now.
His condemnation must include every mad scientist and all upperclass gentlemen who lead double lives.
We’re waiting.
As though there weren’t already enough pile-on, here’s my attempt at a couple of clarifications.
The furry subculture, generally, has a case of the Geek Social Fallacies. Since the whole subculture doesn’t have any particular organization or hierarchy, the only way to exclude anyone is by massive social pressure – pressure that people are very reluctant to apply. The general attitude is “we’re a group who are frequently ostracized and demonized, therefore we shouldn’t be excluding people.” Even though it’s fallacious, that’s an argument with emotional strength. As mentioned earlier, the furry subculture is also diverse: “the one “unifying characteristic” is about as unifying as creating a fandom around everyone whose names begin with a certain letter” is a pretty good description.
With both of these factors together, the furry subculture can be a magnet for things that make the US’ mainstream culture twitch – or in more selfish terms, it’s got deviants I like and deviants I don’t like. Because of these social dynamics, even though it’s very obvious very fast that people like Cigarskunk and RHJunior and company are lunatics, there’s not really much one can do about it besides to keep insisting that they don’t represent the subcultures that they claim membership in any more accurately than they represent the macrocultures (Americans, Anglos, Earthlings) that they claim membership in.
Also, a couple of Prim Tut Tut Liberal things – come on, people, let’s stick to attacking fallacious and idiotic worldviews instead of personal peccadilloes. This is like the situation with Ann Coulter: just because she’s a torture-and-theocracy-advocating fascist doesn’t mean it’s okay to use sexist language about her. As well, Encyclopedia Dramatica and CYD, while full of lulz, are not really reliable sources. I’d say that they’re as reliable as Fox, but at least ED has the grace to tell you their agenda right away, which puts them ahead.
Quoted, as they say, for truth.
The vast spread of kinds-of-folk who might share some sliver of a Venn diagram with freak jobs like CigarSkunk is extraordinarily over-generalized by a label like ‘the furry fandom’. There are no organizing principles or agreed upon definitions and characteristics about what ‘furry’ means, its a label anybody can put on themselves.
So what invariably happens is the craziest are the most public about the label, and in short order every blog and forum has to have an OMFGFURRIES!! moment where every hyperbolic example is used to tar thousands of quiet, sane people with interests somewhere in the sphere of ‘fur’. I used to use a handle online that had the familiar “blahblah Fox” construction, and in recent months I’ve had to abandon it entirely because a few asshats carry on in disgusting fashions (usually causing no harm, but being quite off putting to the vanilla sensibilities), and that is all anybody thinks when they here the word.
Fursuits and zoophilia have as much to do with the furry fandom as crystal meth and malicious STI transmissions have to do with homosexuality — in either case there are a few fringe cases, but you insinuate some nasty things about a much larger population when you invoke those generalizations.
If there is one generalization I can make after almost a decade of interaction with people who would identify themselves are furs, its that on the whole, the fandom is very far to the left on social issues, and center/left on financial.
the fandom is very far to the left on social issues, and center/left on financial.
So more Obama voters than Clinton, I’m guessing? They need to add this to the exit polls so we can get a better reading on the furry vote.
Obama looked so awkward in that badger suit. He’s obviously an elitist with no grasp of the common furs.
I have to say, what weirds me out about this whole thing isn’t so much the idea of people being attracted to anthropomorphic animal cartoons or having sex in fur suits. I got used to that years ago. What I think is a little twilighty is that our acceptance of a sexual practice seems to hinge on the political views of the community.
He’s obviously an elitist with no grasp of the common furs.
Nonsense. He promotes furness and equality!
When I first glanced at that, I thought it said I can handle people getting tumescent with their personal peccadillo…
It’s late. I must have sleep.
A comment from Sweetness & Light:
“Granted the enlistment records are said to be missing as much as 13% of the inductees, due to key punch card malfunctions.
But what are the odds that Obama’s great uncle’s records would be missing?”
Yes, WTF could the odds be? If only there were some pecentage we could use… This kind of stupid really offends me.
He’s obviously an elitist with no grasp of the common furs.
The common furze? I would certainly look awkward in the middle of a gorsebush.
I read above how having some kind of animal suffix in your online handle seems to be some kind of indication as to membership in the furry club. Not sure if the -yeti carries with it the same overtones of fluffy available sexuality that the -Fox seems to, but I guess I better err on the side of caution.
Although, if there’s anyone out there whipping the skippy to the thought of an 8-ft. Himalayan mythological beast, well, they’ve at least got a little more imagination than the general run of furries.
Any suggestions for a new handle that would not attract the attention/affection of the dazed zeta males in TinyToons costumes?
I don’t know if anybody is still reading this, but I have to say: At least one of those WW2 vets spent his time whacking it to Disney character. I guarantee it.
I’m skeptical about the idea that the Ancient Egyptians wanted to fuck Bastet cause she had a cat head, but the whole cartoon fetish thing is in no way a recent phenomenon. First of all, furry as we know it goes back about 30 years. Before that, you had stuff like Fritz the Cat, which wasn’t meant as porn, but I’m sure it turned somebody on.
And then before that you have the very enigmatic Tijuana Bibles; these were little 8 page pornographic comics, produced by unknown sources (Most people seem to think it was the mob) and featuring pop culture icons having sex. In some cases “pop culture icons” means “Faye Wray and John Dillenger” but in others it meant, and I’m not kidding at all here, “Mickey and Minnie Mouse”.
They were produced from the late 20s to the 50s, and it’s hard to know what to make of them. Part of you wants to say, “Oh, they just showed Mickey screwing Minnie to deflate Disney.” but they’re so blunt and apolitical it’s also hard not to conclude that somebody just wanted to see cartoon animals fucking. And so we’re clear, this was hard-core, very explicit pornography. Lots of crudely drawn genitals.
There used to be a site that had a lot of them you could read for free, but it seems to be gone. My favorite was about Wimpy from Popeye pimping himself out for hamburger money.
Anyway, just google “Tijuana bibles” and prepare to be enlightened about how perverted the Greatest Generation really was.
Not to rend other delegates with our teeth; That is the Law.
Are we not Democrats?
I totally agree with Smut Clyde. As much as it’s true that one man’s garam masala is another man’s chaat masala, I reserve the right to laugh at people who can’t handle a little heat. Plus brussel sprouts? Ewwww.
Is it true that furries have over 25 words for felt?
Is it true that the Scots have over 25 words for furze?
Is there a wingnut discussion of Cigarskunkgate? Just, you know, curious.
I don’t know what happened here.
Please don’t ever tell me.
google “Tijuana bibles” and prepare to be enlightened about how perverted the Greatest Generation really was.
Further proof that Rule 34 predates the intertubes.
I just got an image of Cigarskunk in an Acme Swiftboat (TM), with an outboard motor that sputters as the river flows towards a big waterfall, and, he’s frantically yanking at the starter while going over the edge (and puffing on a massive El Ropo all this time).
And then on the rocks clubbing the motor because it works now..
Good Gentlewoman,
I apologize for intruding upon your protected sanctuary of bliss, but I feel that I am honor-bound to inform you that what has transpired in this premise here is simply TEH BEST THREAD EVAR!!eleven!@111
http://www.e621.net/data/f8/e6/f8e684adabd1ad0255abf20b92dd892a.jpg (SFW)
I’m posting my real name cuz I want ol Ciggo to know that I posted this (he thinks of me as his #1 Lib’rul Enemy)
Pedestrian: there is, in fact, such a poll.
I recommend clicking on this Feds Seize Cocaine Jesus link instead, though. The poll is, well, a poll. Pretty dang mundane.
Interesting poll results; much higher concentrations of gay, bisexual, atheist, and agnostic than the general population. At 22% the number of ‘fursuiters’ is actually a little higher than I was expecting.
Geek subcultures need more demographic research! The Daedallus Project (MMO gamers) is not enough. I seriously love to see polls like this on niche groups, the corrolations that pop up make for great trivia, and if I love one thing, it is trivial knowledge.
Heh, that reminds me of the best furry joke:
By and large, the fandom is large and bi.
Is it too late now to cue up one of my favorite songs, GWAR’s “Fuckin’ an Animal”?
Animal!– Not proud of what I do,
Fuckin’ an animal– I have a great time at the zoo,
Fuckin’ an animal– Because you won’t let me fuck you…
Animal!
Sha na na na – sha na na na na
Sha na na na – sha na na na na
Sha na na na – sha na na na na
Sha na na na – sha na na na na
Yiff yiff yiff yiff yiff yiff yiff yiff
Mum mum mum mum mum mum
Rim a dog
Sha na na na – sha na na na na
http://www.thesilhouettes.org/get-a-job.htm
Just checked back at Herr Ciggo’s FA journal, and just as expected, he’s creaming all over himself about the possibility of a Michella Obama “whitey” video coming out. Watch what happens when it’s found out she was really saying “Why’d he” (as in “Why would he (meaning Bush) all along.
That’s gonna be Barack: 2 Ciggo:0
Yeah, I got blocked after I suppose he grew tired of me getting a little too close to the truth. Too bad, in a way, because in true Reich Wing style there’s a fairly egregious grammar error in his comment about I was “project”. and I was going to say, “See, and here I thought I was analyze you”.
I’m just surprised he hasn’t deleted any comments, nor banned me before now. Usually these basement dweller types run a pretty tight ship in the comments department. Can’t look like a complete jackass, after all. You need some dignity, after all, to be able to look yourself in the mirror in the morning.
I do have to stand in awe of the fact that he is able to live with himself. I know if I was him, I’d never be able to.
there’s a fairly egregious grammar error in his comment about I was “project”.
This is of course central to my point.
Liberal Grammar Fascists. Hmpf.
Can I blame it on WordPress?
Old rule of the internet — don’t worry about it.
Interesting poll results; much higher concentrations of gay, bisexual, atheist, and agnostic than the general population.
Also better educated. c.f.
Elitists yiffers reveling in their credentialistic bookitudes. That 5% with advanced degrees probably all have MBAs. Jerks.
Further proof of my lake of eddikashuns, WordPress ate my linkee
It’s even more bizarre than you can believe. Cigarskunk is notoriously known by Furries for inventing two girlfriends, then faking their deaths when people got a little too close to the truth:
http://furry.wikia.com/wiki/Mousey_Love_Girls
Lulz a-plenty.
I realize that I am probably wasting my time with you assholes, but at least I tried.
First of all, I couldn’t care less about your politics. Damn those who dare to disagree with your politics as “wingnuts”, go knock yourselves out. Ridicule Cigarskunk for his politics, well, he’s a big boy and can take care of himself. Defame an international fandom: un-DAMN-acceptable. You crossed that line. Would you be so cavalier about doing this to African-Americans, or Jews, or Latinos? But Furries are acceptable targets for your liberal bigotry, I suppose. More of that liberal “tolerance”?
We Furries don’t “fuck rats”.
We Furries don’t yiff in fursuits. Fursuiters are, at most, 20% of the fan base. The vast majority have never had sex in them and never will. If you’d ever worn one, or seen one up close, you would know why.
We Furries are not pedophiles.
CYD and Encyclopedia Dramatica are not reputable sources.
There are a great many Furries who keep their fetishes, kinks, and odd sexual hobbies separate from their fandom.
Cargo and Simba, if you are this insecure amoung the mundanes, then perhaps Furdom isn’t for you after all? With “friends” like you two, we don’t need any enemies. What the hell were you thinking for sending the mundanes to those nasty furbash websites?
I’d put up some Furry links, but I figure it’s just another waste of time, asking you to learn a little something about that which you attack in ignorance. I’ve dealt with your type on many previous occasions. Your furbashing, furhating little minds are made up and facts would only confuse you. Or I’d be exposing more Furs to your abuse at worst. “Reality based community”, yeah right.
Sadly No owes me and the entire fandom a public apology. I’m not holding my breath.
Yeah, I am one pissed off Fur here.
Sadly No owes me and the entire fandom a public apology.
Heh. Who else owes you an apology and how many of those have you received?
Heh, indeed. Looking at Simo’s web site I call parody. For one, it looks like a furry version of that Maddox site, and the other thing is there are too many furry stereotypes both in that comment and the site for it to be real.
Hey Simo, Are you just yelling, or do you want an answer to
Shit no. While the Sadlies are shockingly deferential to blacks and Jews, I can’t find any good Latino snark. Clearly, this place must actually run by illegal immigrants with Tequila powered razor tipped decapitating Islam worshipping sombreros.
If you bothered to actually read what’s here, you’ll notice we’re mocking what people have posted about themselves. If some straight guy went to the same effort that Cigarskunk did to proclaim his love of the missionary position, it’d be mocked here too. Actually, if you know of such a site, please provide a link.
Oddly enough; FurAffinity, the site from which CigarSkunk spins out his fantasies in which he is never wrong, consistently gets higher levels of internet traffic than just about any right-wing blog. (FA did have an outage towards the end of last month, which explains that dip)
According to Alexa anyway.
Is a flood of right-wing and traffic-hungry bloggers about to discover they’re “furry” too?
Oooh, that demands a photoshop contest.
Simo: “Defame an international fandom: un-DAMN-acceptable. You crossed that line. Would you be so cavalier about doing this to African-Americans, or Jews, or Latinos?”
So Trekkies = African-Americans
And Comic Book Geeks = Hispanics
And Magic the Gathering players = Jews
Got it. Thanks for clearing that up.
Oh, and on the topic ‘defaming’ — I’d say that once someone goes out in public wearing a purple skunk outfit, they’ve pretty much given others carte blanche to diss them. But YMMV.
Daaaang, Simo. I can understand that you’d instantly latch onto any mention of having sex with animals, but here in Mundane World, “ratfucking” refers to sabotaging a political campaign.
Simo:
You are going overboard. The useful points you made were that CYD and ED are not to be taken at face value, and that having sex in a fursuit is unappealing to the vast majority of the fandom.
As for the rest of it… tone down the rhetoric and the outrage; it is more likely to alienate than it is to correct the misinformed.
Also, you are a filthy emacs user, and you dishonor your distro (which is my distro too). 😛
emacs?!?!?!
Everybody knows that vi rules^H^H^H^H^HROOLZ
Cargo and Simba, if you are this insecure amoung the mundanes, then perhaps Furdom isn’t for you after all? With “friends” like you two, we don’t need any enemies. What the hell were you thinking for sending the mundanes to those nasty furbash websites?
I didn’t send anybody anywhere, these guys used google all on their own. And I’ve been in this gorram fracking fandom for 15 years, probably longer than you. Anyone who uses the word ‘mundane’ is an idiot. I SAID GOOD DAY SIR
I’m diggin’ on the snarklicity here, not to mention all the disdain.
Sombody pass the Yiffy Pop.
“Mundanes”? Is that like the Scientologists with their “wogs”?
Um, okay, you “extraordinary” guy.
eh, it depends on what you’re talking about. It’s a word that probably shouldn’t be generally thrown around, but it does have appropriate uses (I think).
I don’t think that the term is unique to furries, btw. I think it is a general fandom term—science fiction, anime, Star Trek, etc. use it too.
I think it’s one of those things where it depends on the person using it if they really think they are better than everyone else for being in the fandom.
btw, if I may derail this thread in yet another direction—everyone knows that Slackware is for mundane l00zers.
Real furries use Debian.
Oh please. The obvious here is GNU/Linux.
I comment by spinning magnets at different velocities on top of my warwalking rig of a CBM Vic-20 and a PCMCIA 802.11 card.
*cough*
Simba,
I’d offer you a lozenge, but your cough appears to be full of win.
“I don’t think that the term is unique to furries, btw. I think it is a general fandom term—science fiction, anime, Star Trek, etc. use it too.”
Oh, horseshit.
I’ve been going to science fiction-related cons since the mid-70s, and I’ve never once heard the word “mundanes” used to describe anyone.
You’re really reaching here, Simba. What is it that you’re supposed to do when you find yourself in a hole of your own making?
OB, Simba is not Simo and not very enemy-like.
Besides, aren’t they all “muggles” now?
@Pedestrian:
The quip about human-animal hybrids was mostly intended to be facetious, though if you’ve read the Congressional Record transcripts on human-animal hybrids it does sound like something taken out of a sci-fi novel. Typically this is the kind of thing you would have heard at furry convention discussion panels years ago. I know it amused me greatly to know that this sort of conversation was taking place in our hallowed halls of government. 🙂
PS: The term”mundanes” isn’t only a sci-fi/furry term to describe non-fen. It’s also used by the SCA/Renfaire types. Or at least it was back in the late 80s when I heard it.
Ghods, I feel old now. Thanks.
Heh. I remember those hearings. They were something like a running gag in the furry community for a while. The joke was that Congress wanted to make furries illegal.
Just to settle this one note.
The useage of the term mundane to mean “a person who does not share the interests of a particular group of enthusiasts (used esp. among science fiction fans)” dates from some point in time around the late 1950s.
See reference here.
Ah, the things I miss, when I’m prepping to move from Tokyo to Kansas…
That said, who’s willing to bet that Ciggy’ll be showing up to gripe about how he’s being fursecuted?
hey, the annual “furry” convention was this weekend in pittsburgh. great fun had by all.
Why do furries moan about ‘mundanes’ (a term as gratuitously insulting as ‘breeder’) when they’re happy to put up with all the fundies, far-rightists, wingnuts and whackjobs in their midst?!
Wow you guys have nothing better to do then to argue, don’t you…
But for the record, people that heavilly promote the stereotype usually are shunned…
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What a piece of shit that Cigarskunk is. Hes the type of person who makes
all furs look bad.
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My fursona is really homophobic
I love comment necromancy.
RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE!