Revenge of the Liberal Grammar Fascists
Jonah Goldberg is piling on the McClellan business. Although that might be physically painful if literally true, Jonah’s takedown is scarcely perceptible in the metaphorical sense.
He starts out with a swipe at McClellan’s grasp of the English language:
It’s been rumored that McClellan was hired by the Bush White House to appeal to a specific sub-constituency: pasty middle-aged men with a thumbless grasp of the English language.
Although you may snicker at DoughBob LoadPants calling anyone else pasty, you should be convulsed in laughter and spewing your morning coffee all over your laptop that Jonah would have the temerity to accuse anyone else of having “a thumbless grasp of the English language.” Item:
In McClellan’s book, What Happened (oddly missing a question mark), the author purports to explain how the Bush White House launched a “propaganda machine” to push the country into a war of choice.
Sweet Fowler’s Modern English Usage on a pogo stick, this feckless fleshlump doesn’t even know that interrogative pronouns can be used both to ask a question and to introduce a noun clause. Goucher College should be quite proud of its most famous alumnus.
Gavin adds: To be rigorously charitable, he might have been attempting a joke. But as usual, the joke is ultimately on Jonah:
Jonah Goldberg, January 10, 2008:
[Ezra Klein] calls John Holbo’s “review” of my book “one of the finest pieces of writing I’ve ever read in the blogosphere.” Of course Holbo hadn’t actually — what’s that word again? oh right — read my book before he crafted this oh so fine piece of writing. Once again, Ezra is so perfectly, comically, Ezra. He himself famously finds it very hard to read books (It’s hard and it’s boring and it takes a really long time, he says). So he outsources criticism to people who haven’t read it either. It’s a pas de deux of phone-it-in hackery.
Wait, let’s have that phrase again:
…phone-it-in hackery.
Jonah Goldberg, May 30, 2008:
In McClellan’s book, What Happened (oddly missing a question mark), the author purports to explain how the Bush White House launched a “propaganda machine” to push the country into a war of choice.
I have not read the book. I will once I finish eating the contents of my sock drawer (which ranks slightly higher on my to-do list).
Don’t forget the crow drawer.
Clif adds: At the request of commenters sagra and Doctorb Science, we have Jonah with paste:
Real Talk: I almost went to Goucher, being a dude from the great state of Maryland who likes being surrounded by women. Sadly, I could not afford it. That coulda been me up there. That coulda been me.
It sounds like someone is trying to make politics into a religion, which is central to his point.
Speaking of pasty, next time can we see Jonah holding a jar of paste?
Everytime you post something from that idiot, I say to myself, “He can’t be that retarded!” and the next time you prove me wrong.
What idiocy.
Because some people have a way with words, and other people… not have way.
Shorter Goldberg: “Whew! Thank god I’m not middle-aged, yet! Can anyone with a firm grasp of McClellan’s history send me the important points so I can write a review of his book? Thanks.”
“…pasty middle-aged men with a thumbless grasp of the English language.” Isn’t that the Republican base?
It’s been rumored that McClellan was hired by the Bush White House to appeal to a specific sub-constituency: pasty middle-aged men with a thumbless grasp of the English language.
Yes, I’ve heard of this sub-constituency–it’s called the Republican Party.
Damn you Davis, and your quick trigger…
“It’s been rumored that McClellan was hired by the Bush White House to appeal to a specific sub-constituency: pasty middle-aged men with a thumbless grasp of the English language.”
So…that’d be you, then, wouldn’t it?
It’s always sad when a young conservative grows up to bite the hand that fed him delicious pork rind casserole.
This. Jonah is what you would call aggressively stupid.
I thought the Bush White House hired Bush to appeal to pasty middle-aged men with a thumbless grasp of the English language. That’s not their core constituancy… that’s them.
So the right wing response to McClellan seems to consist of the following well-reasoned arguments which have never been made with such detail or such care and which are indeed central to my point:
– McClellan sucks.
I think that’s an exhaustive list, but if anyone has anything to add, let me know.
I read this site and look at the pictures of right-wing nutjobs with perches in the media, and I think, “Gee, wouldn’t it be interesting to see a blog entry that simply includes pictures of five to 10 people like Jonah Goldberg and, for comparative purposes, include photos of five to 10 progressive media types.” I mean, some of these people on the right just don’t look “normal.”
Dude is 39. If he ain’t middle aged, he certainly is on the cusp, which he’ll try to eat.
Fixed.
>Dude is 39. If he ain’t middle aged, he certainly is on the cusp, which he’ll try to eat.
J, in Jonah’s family it’s actually “middle weight”, not age. By that metric he looks about halfway to mommy, so he’s right on target.
I’m pretty sure the Doughy one was attempting a joke with that question mark line (as in Scott McClellan was such a stoner-hippy that his book should be called “What Happened, Dude?”) Epic fail, as the hip kidz say.
That said, this is really my favorite line in the piece: I have not read the book.
Never let it be said that Jonah inflicted his opinions with anything approaching a fact or research. Now, could someone read the book for him, tell him the important bits and he’ll happily credit you in his next opus which will be a heart-breaking work of staggering genius (except that name is already taken but he’s too lazy to think of another.)
damn you javafascist, you beat me to it on both my points. I would add re: the second, it’s especially funny in light of his constant whines viv-a-vs “Liberal Fascism: How Hilary Clinton is no different than Adolf Hitler” that A. You can’t say anything until you read it or B. All these critics who haven’t bothered to read it can’t possibly have anything to say about it.
I’m sure the Load will weigh in on how the NRO’s #1 Conservative Anthem is from a band whose name is oddly missing a question mark.
Which is central to his thesis.
Christ, every time I read something about this fool, and I realize that he has a job writing a column for the LA Times, I die a little inside. Have we as a country really fallen that far? This is one of our public intellectuals?
We don’t have public intellectuals anymore. We have public anti-intellectuals.
This is one of our public intellectuals?
No, he’s one of our public ineffectuals (or possibly a pubic infectional). No worries, its an easy mistake.
Oddly missing like Jonah’s restraint at an Old Country Buffet?
That said, this is really my favorite line in the piece: I have not read the book.
Ha. When they met to select the America’s Future Foundation’s College Blogger of 2008, Megan McArdle shared with Goldberg her totally awesome secret formula for writing killer book reviews.
Dude?
Dude!
Dude.
Dude…
So much fun.
Jonah’s so bent his thumbs are on backwards.
My demographic does not sympathize with pudgy middle-aged white men raging at the encroaching world. Nor do we enjoy watching vapid bleach-blond models with matching pink lip gloss read us the headlines each morning.
We would, however, like to see more of this.
It’s just like the Chinese language, where you have a base of ~5,500 conceptual words represented by only ~200 sounds. Because of this, the Mandarin dialect has four different tones, and the Cantonese dialect has as many as seven tones.
Apparently, McClellan’s only beef with the White House is how he was treated during the Plame affair. It’s true, I admit to not having read the book, but, indeed, that is central to my point.
/pantload
As with Eskimos and snow, dudes have as many as 25 different words for dude.
The original liberal fascists weren’t in the French Revolution, but the people who didn’t follow a what with a question mark?
Isn’t this the fucktard who pissed, whined, and bled self righteous indignation at the proposition that people wrote Amazon reviews of his steaming bowl-wart before reading the whole thing?
Sigh.
This week I am positive there was a meeting of the LATimes management where it was asked at least once, ‘Why do we keep losing subscribers?’.
btw, are there any other animals’ feet that get boiled and brined?
Aw, Gavin, you beat me to it…
What Jonah needs is a swift kick in the ‘nads
?.Scott McClellan is the remedial English teacher of Liberal Fascism.
i’ve actually applied for the job of editor at the LA Times (of the sunday magazine, but whatever), purely on the off-hand chance that they’d hire me and i could then get to work getting jonah fired.
so far, as someone said above, epic fail. but i’m in with a shot, they haven’t hired anyone in 9 months (tells you how much zell cares about the paper) so who knows?
What Jonah needs is a swift kick in the ‘nads.
Objection! Assumes traget not in evidence.
Lucianne keeps his ‘nads in a wooden casket on her desk.
Another great book for Pantload to read, or have read to him.
Dude, what does Jonah have to eat in his sock dra–
Forget it.
Actually I meant Nads.
As with Eskimos and snow
Oh! Oh! [adjusts pedant cap]
That is actually a myth. For one thing, there are many Inuit language varients, so while there may be dozens of words for snow, not everyone uses all of them. This was misunderstood by some hack journalist decades ago and has been perpetuated ever since. Also, while a particular language might have multiple words for “snow”, so do we:
snow
slush
flurries
ice
powder
freezing rain
blizzard
sleet
blow
coke
sugar
white lady
bump
I’m sorry… what?
I guess back in grammar school Jonah used to write compositions entitled “What I Did on My Summer Vacation?” with his thumbs.
I wish the nickname “Sylvester Marcus” would catch on for Mr. DP.
too obscure?
Oh! Oh! [adjusts pedant cap]
I thought I was writing something that was so obviously full of shit that no pedants were required. But what is that funny checkered scarf you’re wearing with that cap, TERRORIST?
I’m always amazed at what an awful writer Jonah Goldberg is. This guy is supposed to be some kind of public intellectual? This is who the right wingers want to make their case for them? I’m just some high-school graduate nobody and even I can see how much he sucks. I can only imagine how pathetic he must look to someone with a degree in English or Literature or something.
Hey, lay off of that handsome and likeable Jonah Goldberg fellow. Writing about “What Happened (sic)” without having read it is perfectly reasonable — we’ve all seen blurbs and heard other people talking about it. The Amazon reviews that Mr. Goldberg was complaining about were prejudging his book, which is the worst kind of prejudice: the kind against Jonah Goldberg.
Hmmmph. Refresh before post. Refresh before post.
What mitch said.
I thought I was writing something that was so obviously full of shit that no pedants were required.
Obvious shit is what pedants do best!
But what is that funny checkered scarf you’re wearing with that cap, TERRORIST?
It’s actually woven from the pubic hair of the many enemies of America that I am in bed with.
It occurred to me that this might be a joke on Goldberg’s part–as if he were to say that McClellan wouldn’t know what happened, so he should put a question mark there. But I read his post carefully, and I don’t think it’s meant to be a joke. I think he means that there really should be a question mark there.
Isn’t this the fucktard who pissed, whined, and bled self righteous indignation at the proposition that people wrote Amazon reviews of his steaming bowl-wart before reading the whole thing?
Absolutely. But it’s still technically not hypocritical – from his writing, he doesn’t even read his *own* work.
What?!
.
Jonah holding a jar of paste would be great.
The fact is, because Jonah hasn’t even read the book, not even he knows what he meant by the missing question mark point. Any further inquiry will require one to dive deeper into the lazy mind of teh Pantload. Such will not be pretty and no good can possibly come from such an enterprise.
Walk away.
My late, lamented cocker spaniel had a better grasp of the English language than Jonah Goldberg. Also a more highly developed moral and ethical code.
Unfortunately, like Jonah, she had a habit of peeing on the rugs. And her mother was a bitch, too.
This is who the right wingers want to make their case for them?
The interesting thing for me is, these classic right-wing intellectuals tend to be *terrible* with straight logic. And with a blind spot to the actual essence of the matter. Almost like they’d rather dismiss it or distract from it, than discuss it. Imagine that?
But from William F. Buckley to David Brooks to Jonah Goldberg, they just don’t get it in a way that is so constant and so intractable, it seems almost deliberate.
(For a great deconstruction and destruction of Buckley’s style, youtube Chomsky vs. Buckley. Back in the late 60’s Buckley was brave and foolish enough to debate Chomsky. Buckley tried his typical game of floating some high-minded semantically-null statements with loads of unexamined assumptions, and Chomsky just TAKES HIM APART.)
Anyway, I go back and forth about it. Is it unconsciously terrible logic, because that’s what it takes to believe in the lumped-together bill of goods the GOP is selling to the lower and middle classes? Or is it deliberate propaganda, that requires this sort of compartmentalized un-thinking in order to keep a job shilling conservative opiates to the masses?
I’ve always seen Jonah as a hack-it-in-phony (using hack as: 12. to cough harshly, usually in short and repeated spasms.) But what do I know I only live near Goucher and count myself among the 3 liberal friends Scottie “the Bull” has.
Pedestrian, who put a nickel in your slot?
You are full of win today.
[ed. note: if this posts twice, blame frigging wordpress, the liberal fascist blogging tool]
From Urban Dictionary, which is always, always right.
Unfortunate image: Jonah’s edible porn.
Pasty middle aged white dudes just son’t want to be misunderestimated.
As Roy Edroso says of D.P.: “This is the stupidest thing ever written, and will remain so until Goldberg writes something else.”
Another Jim–
Speaking of logic, you may enjoy this: http://thenonsequitur.com/?cat=44. There is a way their logical failure is “tractable.”
Pardon the self promotion.
“McClellan was hired by the Bush White House to appeal to a specific sub-constituency: pasty middle-aged men with a thumbless grasp of the English language.”
Nothing “elitist” here.
The fatuous fat-ass weighs in. Wades in. Waist sin. Wastes Zin. I hate dragon dictate.
So that would be the black and white version or the red and white?
adjusts pedant cap
I call mine my supercilious pileus.
When the Doughy Pantload is your subject, the poop jokes write themselves.
Actuall Jonah, I think you’ll find plenty of Beltway Republicans inserting all sorts of thing into all sorts of body cavities.
“Feckless”? “Crapweasel”? (I quote from the beginning of Pantload’s Scotty post.) I think The Doughy One has been lurking around S,N!’s comment sections and pilfering bon mots.
Speaking of that opening graph: What kind of childhood did this unfortunate being have, anyway? Jeezaroni.
Goldberg subscribes to the He-Man school of reviewing, wherein it is a truism that only lily-livered pansies actually READ what they’re being paid good money to critique.
I vote to award this thread to another jim (@18:15), & not just for the sexy name, either – if you’ve ever checked out his live text interviews you can readily tell what a full-bore pinhead he truly is. I’m not merely talking shite orthography – many inadvertantly spell like 4-year-olds when texting quickly & without previewing – I’m talking psych-ward-grade unreason that would make an acidhead blush for shame, all delivered with that Pantload aura of smug triumph.
I hope Mr. another has at least contemplated the possibility (only achievable in real life from deep within the depraved semiotic Rubic’s Cube of neocon thought, or its ideological kin) that his latter either/or query might be solved with “All Of The Above” … in fact, that massive logic-tumor may be an essential ingredient of a cracker-jack propagandist, if he or she is trapped in an age where one’s attempts at purveying craven bullshit can be brought down like a senile gazelle in a cheetah’s fangs in a matter of seconds, via the magical Gazoogle-machine or other formidable fact-sites all around the Interwebs.
Is it me or is the Pantload looking more like Rush these days? Looks like all those bags of Cheetos are starting to pile on there. Maybe an enlistment in the Marines, followed by three or four deployments to Iraq, might help him trim down a bit.
I finally figured it out. Jonah thinks Scottie’s from SoCal, or Canuckistan. Where every sentence ends with a ?
Although bonus points to Pantload for saying that there’s a swirling porcelain bowl inhabiting the Oval Office.
der said: But what do I know I only live near Goucher
I grew up in Timonium and took some summer courses there. Lovely campus back then. Then they let the Doughbob in.
Me mess up sentence? That’s un-possible!
BOOOOMMMM! My hypocrisy detector just ass-ploded.
Gather round my droogs and take a hit of this:
Pantload’s unloaded a remarkably petulent and sneering attack on Scottie. Why on earth would Jonah be enraged by the defection of a white, rotund, pasty-faced man-boy lost among his famous parents and their friends, and clearly in over his head?
How dare Scottie disobey and disgrace the family? Who does he think he is, acting as if he’s just as important as his betters?
Why, after all, is it important to defend the fucking albatross?
Clif is teh AWESOME! Truly that is a thing of beauty…in a completely nauseating way.
Oh fer fuck’s sake! He wrote those words!?!?
substitute “Fascist” for propaganda and, and, and then… *blink* *blink*
That rotting corpse of an albatross is still their meal ticket. All conservatives want is someone to lie to them, and they’ll pay dearly for the privilege.
Thx for the kind comments on my comment…it’s an ongoing fascination of mine.
To say it more succinctly: William F. Buckley, David Brooks and Jonah Goldberg may all be equally logical. It’s just that the prose is more in service of *rationalizing* than being rational.
And thus, as the prose sinks abysmally from Buckley to Goldberg, the terrible (lack of) thinking behind their shared ideology is ever more revealed.
In other words, the typical Bush supporter and Goldberg fan.
Hey Jonah, do you really want to be that honest about your ‘base’?
That rotting corpse of an albatross is still their meal ticket.
A worse mix of metaphors could not happen to a better set of people.
.
It’s pretty obvious that, like Scott McClellan, the Pantload is a liberal mole. It’s a brilliant plan. Pretend to be a conservative, then make conservatives look bad by writing nothing but columns that are delusional, fact-free, nasty, hypocritical, steaming piles of poo, making a disgusting hash of whatever small amount of sense there may be in the conservative doctrine.
This would counter all the brilliant, perceptive work by conservative columnists like … uh … how about, no, his Pulitzers notwithstanding, he’s pretty lame … them what about, no not her … (help me out here).
It just goes to prove the liberal bias in the media. The gatekeepers won’t let decent, honest, smart conservatives anywhere near the keyboard or the microphone.
Jonah’s mother, Lucianne.
How’s this for a tasty tidbit? Jeff Guckert-Gannon on Scotty:
Hmmmmmm.
I think it says a lot about conservatism that a mediocre, pretentious hack like Buckley is considered one of their great thinkers.
Kind of reminds me of how Mallard Fillmore is the conservative answer to Doonesbury … or how Ben Stein is their Michael Moore.
Oh. Buckley’s dead?
He was a great man.
Jonah’s mother, Lucianne.
Righteous Bubba said,
May 30, 2008 at 17:37
As with Eskimos and snow, dudes have as many as 25 different words for dude.
*****
01.)dude
02.)dude-man
03.)son
04.)sonny
05.)cat
06.)hepcat
07.)sir
08.)mister
09.)shorty
10.)holmes
11.)homie
12.)money
13.)moneygrip
14.)dun
15.)dunny
16.)god
17.)yo
18.)man
19.)kid
20.)boy
21.)boyo
22.)dog
23.)head (exclusively plural)
24.)woady
25.)player
list generated in two minutes from memory…
As a parent let me say that the soothing balm of Boutreaux Butt Paste is far too good for that swollen ass.
This is more appropriate.
Shippam’s Bloater Paste
DuhoBob uses the term “pasty white middle-aged men” in a screed? Did I read that correctly? Wow, talk about walking sooooooo close to the edge of the abyss of truth that you can allllmmmmmoooooooossssttt see it.
One thing you have to admire about Pantload is that he’s consistently stupid. Not once does he teeter off course into clarity or rationality.
That counts for something.
hepcat?
I dig Daddy-O. Spare a brother a dime.
Jack don’t know jack, he’s just a Joe.
You didn’t even use “guy”.
Pedestrian, who put a nickel in your slot?
Now that’s not really fair. It may not have been a big kielbasa, but it was at least a roll of quarters.
“”In McClellan’s book, What Happened (oddly missing a question mark),””
This great! It’s the sort of stupid that people do when they are starting to lose it.
“It may not have been a big kielbasa…”
Perhaps I was insufficiently careful with my choice of words.
Perhaps I was insufficiently careful with my choice of words.
I think we’re all tired of boners by now.
Perhaps I was insufficiently careful with my choice of words.
No, I’m just over-caffeinated
I hope Mr. another has at least contemplated the possibility (only achievable in real life from deep within the depraved semiotic Rubic’s Cube of neocon thought, or its ideological kin) that his latter either/or query might be solved with “All Of The Above”
I have considered it, actually; but you bring it up in a good way that interests me to explore.
It’s a bit disturbing for me to consider that people can not only be irrational – and not only *choose* to be irrational (!) – but in fact *choose to switch back and forth* between being rational and irrational ***without even thinking logically about it***(!!!). But of course, alogical thinking is all throughout the system. So, while disturbing, that theory is actually quite elegant.
And as I look at these specific situations, I bet that something very like “all of the above” is the case. I mean, David Brooks couldn’t even cash his paycheck, if he used the same terrible logic of his columns to find the bank. So, yeah, they must be able to do all of the above, and be logical at times too – as long as they just pick the right venue.
Perhaps their thought process moves on a spectrum? Going from a “playing the rubes” almost-awareness to a “this feels comfy” coasting-on-instinct, sometimes in the same paragraph? I could see that at work, guided along a suitably vague cover story they tell their conscience, like “Making an interesting article for my readers.”
Maybe this is the power of denial in action. In some cases, I can see denial as a built-in survival mechanism. If your mate was just eaten and it’s kind of your fault, you have to be able to stuff all that thought away and concentrate on killing the leopard or you’re dead too. And this would be spurred on by fear of the leopard.
In our modern times, Jobs are money, money is food, and food is survival. So with this same mechanism, people can definitely avoid thinking about things that might threaten their cushy, tasty job. This is where the survival mechanism becomes inflamed, and in our modern society becomes counter-productive for our species as a whole….
This “all of the above” option would also be much like the classic “doublethink” concept of Orwell’s 1984. But logical thinking is word-based, and we can’t really say 2 or more contradictory things at the same time. So the thinking has to either be emotional, or compartmentalized.
And our brains aren’t built to have a sharp cutoff between different thought processes. So, this sort of compartmentaliztion is accomplished with a much softer sort of “wall”. Certain trains of thought are not followed because there is a hint of metaphysical discomfort in that direction….that idea is being challenged! Threat in that direction! Stop that train of thought!
This may also give some insight into the total outrage that unbalances some of these people when they presented with a *person* who, by their very existence, raises their compartmentalized assumptions and causes them to grind together. Graeme Frost, Rachel Carson and now Scott McClellan are prime examples of this.
And there you have it… A mush of disorganized thinking, which is *kept* disorganized because the act of organizing it, would require examining a lot of comfortable assumptions *and* possibly hurt their livelihoods. Or should I say, lie-velihoods…
Of course, all people of all ideologies, myself included, are very susceptible to rationalization, doublethinking, denial, as well as simple poor thinking. But I think saying that “liberal ideology can be just as bad”, would actually be ignoring some of the evidence. I am of course liberal. But I really there’s case that conservative ideology provides a more comfortable place than liberal ideology, for people who don’t want to connect things logically as a whole.
I’ve always maintained that you should always do up the buttons on a button down collar, and although I have yet to reach Goldberg’s, uh, stature, I am now revisiting that decision.
Ahem…last line should read “But I really *think* there’s case that conservative ideology provides a more comfortable place than liberal ideology, for people who don’t want to connect things logically as a whole.”
Okay, I’ve written an incoherent sentence – can I have my book deal now?
We have always been at war with Scott McClellan
When someone refers to Goldberg as a swine, the proof of it is in the photo above.
Almost as good is a shot he published of himself, sitting in the front seat of a carwith an open laptop, unshaven, wearing shorts and a T-Shirt; there may also have been an open ‘Cheetos’ bag.
While Little Ophan Annie Coulter may get a hard-on having seen that imagery, the rest of America is rolling on the ground, screaming, attempting to scratch our own eyes out.
Butt paste, indeed.
Jonah and/is A Mighty Wind coincidence or not? What Happened, I don’t think so.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D421N6xlisg
cur
re: book deal
needs fadging.
Take that to Regnery.
It’s amazing Buckley ever allowed Goldberg to be hired there. I guess it was owed to Lucianne, though.
“What Happened?” is from A Might Wind. It is the title of a flopped sit-com about a clueless main character that walks around asking ‘what happened?’.
Shorter Goldberg: “Whew! Thank god I’m not middle-aged, yet! Can anyone with a firm grasp of McClellan’s history send me the important points so I can write a review of his book? Thanks.”
Heh.
“Jonah, Jeff Gannon on line 1 for you.”
While Jonah may not have read McClellan’s book, he understands that it is similar to other books he has read and hasn’t liked. For instance, it has a cover, some pages with words on them, cheeto crumbs crushed into its binding by the time he’s only twenty pages into it. So, while McClellan’s book is similar to those other books that Jonah has read and not liked, that doesn’t mean it’s not different in significant ways. Indeed, that is his central point.
Thumbless grasp, did you say?
Just remember, Jonah is the young hip one over at The Corner.
They like him because of his energy, and the fact that he has his thumb on the pulse of The New Generation with their long hair and jungle music.
Jonah, being the gift that gives on giving, might need help. Otherwise I fear he’s just not going to last at the LA times much less the actual MSM. Progressives can’t let a national treasure like the DP fade into obscurity.
Perhaps Jonah should think of adding a regular ‘road to Damascus” shtick to his repetoire, now that it’s the insider thing to do. Jonah knows he can’t handle the workload of being a go-to guy for conservative ideas since he has no idea what that would even involve, likely reading books. Much more honorable he should cash in the stabbed-in-the-back bonanza by turning his scintillating yet profound insight on Conservative fuck-ups once in a while. If it’s good enough for Brooks and Frum, it’s probably too hard for the DP but why not try anyway?
A Guckert/Gannon-Goldberg war would be nothing if not revolting. I say go for it.
Can someone please let me know the approximate ship-date of the device that will allow me to reach through the internet and throttle useless morons?
Because I find myself needing that device more and more these days.
Note: I am prepared to pay extra for expedited shipping.
“…let me know the approximate ship-date…”
It’s coming Real Soon Now. I can’t say for sure but I’m guessing Two Weeks.
The useless conserative morons don’t bother as much since fewer and fewer people take them seriously these days. Even the useless conservatives morons I work with are keeping a low profile these days, chastened by the neutrals who are no longer neutral.
I think we’re all tired of boners by now.
I believe it’s spelled Boener
You’re welcome!
Update: As a result of global warming, the Eskimos are now down to 17 words for snow.
Johah Goldberg: I have not read the book.
Sydney Smith: I never read a book before reviewing it; it prejudices a man so.
The Columbia World of Quotations. 1996.
NUMBER: 54435
QUOTATION: I never read a book before reviewing it; it prejudices a man so.
ATTRIBUTION: Sydney Smith (1771–1845), British clergyman, writer. Quoted in The Smith of Smiths, ch. 3, Hesketh Pearson (1934).
BIOGRAPHY: Columbia Encyclopedia.
Ooooh, thank you for the pasty paste-eater pic!
Pedestrian: (words for snow): you forgot “dope” (see Apartment 3G)
And the Eskimos are now up to 36 words for “asshole global warming deniers.”
That rotting corpse of an albatross is still their meal ticket.
What flavor is it?
What flavor is it?
Wormwood and gall.
oops
Yes, thanks for the paste! I was going to do a photoshop but I could not find a picture of those red flannel pajamas that Ralph Wiggum wears.
I’ve read british press clippings from the civil war. The dire predictions and projected transgressions are great comedy
so the doughy pantload has a place waiting for him in history
history remembers the dillwads who were completely wrong and stupid too
it just doesn’t treat them with much respect
one benefit those British pundits enjoyed was anonymity, the doughy pantload ain’t so lucky
More stupid:
Uhm, that’s a phrase, not a word.
And speaking of being too lazy to read stuff, Jonah not only didn’t bother to read tthe scholar upon whose works he supposedly relied, he “outsourced” the reading AND figuring out :
Liberal Fascism: Two Words Next to Each Other
That rotting corpse of an albatross is still their meal ticket.
What flavor is it?
It’s bleedin’ seabird flavor, what do you think?
Hey, that’s some of Dr. Boudreaux’s fine fine butt paste that ol’ Pantload’s got a hold of.
It’s a good one to use on those excoriated peri-anal regions, though as a native New Englander I also feel the need to give a shout out to teh original Bag Balm.
Carry on.
Did you know there are people who actually like Jonah Goldberg’s writing?
It’s true! Just a week ago I was visiting my Aunt for her college graduation, and she subscribes to National Review. She’s not a big fan, but she says they have some good writers, like Mark Steyn and Jonah Goldberg.
Seriously. I’m not even kidding.
And then on some message board I badmouthed Jonah and somebody told me to justify my opinion. What kind of world is it where I can’t just say, “res ipsa loquitur” to that?
These are not stupid people, either.
How the heck do you go through life thinking Goldberg isn’t a hack?
Shippam’s Bloater Paste
I refuse to believe that there is any such thing as “Bloater Paste”. It exists only in the imagination of P. G. Wodehouse.
RobW said,
May 31, 2008 at 0:44
That rotting corpse of an albatross is still their meal ticket.
What flavor is it?
Does it come with wafers?
It is telling that none of the affronted 20%-ers have yet to play the “Scottie’s a homogay gaywad” card. Because it’s right there at the top of the deck. Wonder why they’ve been so reticent?
I just wonder.
Ask Guckert AKA Gannon, I’m willing to bet serious cash that he knows…
Fucking albatrosses.
I must have missed it…why was it that you posted a picture of Newman holding that jar of butt paste?
Ignatius J. Goldberg is surely going to confound that Myrna Garafalo minx with his latest endeavor! His helpful associates, though largely consisting of degenerates and others of mongoloid stock who could use the wisdom found in the theology and geometry of Boethius if only they could hope to understand its perfection, will surely assist him in this endeavor. And thanks to the paste, his valve will not be a problem.
I can just say what a relief to discover someone who actually knows what theyre talking about on the web. You need to understand how to bring a problem to light to make it important. More and more people should see this and appreciate this side of the story. I cant believe you are not more popular when you definitely hold the gift.