“Deer Grate Pumpken…”
Ol’ Michelle is hurt that people don’t respect her anymore. The Republican Party is cement-galoshed by a president with a 28% approval rating, at a time when 85% of Americans are dissatisfied with the way things are going in the country.
Naturally, Michelle’s genius idea has been to set her flying monkeys against the GOP, to punish them for talking about ‘change’:
The spanking they deserve: NRCC gets an earful
By Michelle Malkin
May 16, 2008 04:51 PMAll week long, you and I have been blasting the bereft Beltway GOP leadership for their empty sloganeering and Obama-esque change obsession.
Now, the NRCC is hearing it directly on its website. Reader Fritz e-mails that the comments section in the NRCC blog post by chairman Tom Cole is sizzling hot with aggravated grass-roots conservative feedback. Go check it out. A sample:
This is not the message I am looking to support. The message of the Replican Part should be fundumentally different than the Democrats. We don’t need to “fix” the government. We need the Federal Government to do wnat it is supposed to – protect our freedom. It should not try to be eveyones “Daddy” Healthcare is not the Federal Governments responsibility. If my new my situation, you might take these comments more seriously. I am not some rich guy who wants to pay less taxes and who can afford to pay for the high prices of healthcare. I just know that government, in general, is inefficiant and wasteful and would like to see less governement programs instead of more.
Posted: Steve Bryant on May 16, 2008 at 12:59 PM
Proceeds from the anthology, Children’s Letters to the Replican Part, will benefit Tom Delay’s Coalition for a Conservative Majority.
“I just know that government, in general, is inefficiant and wasteful and would like to see less governement programs instead of more.”
Says the people who have championed the Chimperor for almost 8 years. Nothing says “small government” like the Bush Administration.
Was Steve enjoying perhaps his Freedoms to consume mind or mood altering substances when he wrote that?
Michelle Malkin:
Michelle Malkin’s Recommendend Slogans for the GOP:
Winner: No Change, No Surrender!
Runner-up: Stay The Course!
2nd Runner Up: The Democrats Are Worse!
.
JGabriel, might I suggest, “Oh, like it’s OUR fault you fuckers are too goddamn stupid to see how well everything is going?!”
Remember me?
In Related News–
“Manila Bar Girl Sues U.S.”
Claims G.I.’s lied to her regarding future support.
Tom Cole is my Congressman. Other than his being a minor Tom Delay crony, I never understood how the guy ended up as chair of the NRCC. But now it seems that Cole may be the perfect captain to oversee the sinking ship of the GOP’s Congressional fortunes.
He seems to have a giant “Kick Me” sign on his back. Despite being an utterly reliable and uninteresting wingnut rubberstamp in Congress, Cole often raises the ire of the wingnuts. The University of Oklahoma’s Dartmouth Review equivalent devoted an entire issue a couple years ago to denouncing him as a “RINO.” And now Malkin…
And through it all, Cole wears his patented hang-dog, deer-in-the-headlights look (yeah, I know, mixed metaphor…two different animals…but that’s what they, and I, are reduced to).
(Bonus pity points: my two Senators are Jim Inhofe and Tom “Dr. Wingnut” Coburn, so Cole is my most sympathetic and competent representative in DC!)
Uh oh, the mole-people are getting restless.
Oh, about that “Permanent Republican Majority”, how’s that working out?
Are you sure that wasn’t a typo for “Replicant Part”? It would explain so much about the GOP.
Some Guy:
You may, but it lacks a certain ‘chantability’ quality. And anything over 3-4 words is too long for a Republican slogan.
Remember, these are people who dial the first three digits of a telephone number, then stop to look up the rest.
.
For some reason I read the name of Tom Delay’s organization as “Coalition for a Conservative Mythology.”
That’s what I get for listening instead of just reading and repeating.
I’m not gonna join in on this dogpile. Michelle looks so sad.
So, so sad.
(I ordered some more Schadenfruede but it wasn’t in the post today. Have to wait until Monday.)
Watch out, she’ll bite your legs off. I can’t decide if she’s more like the Black Knight, or the screaming guy who gets the sword through the head.
“I just know that government, in general, is inefficiant and wasteful and would like to see less governement programs instead of more.”
He just knows.
Generalized statements about government being wasteful always rock my socks. Written by people who conveniently forget every benefit they receive from the civil service.
I’ve met such individuals. In line ups at the post or passport offices bitching because “there aren’t more staff working the counter!!!!” But you didn’t want government, dude. You voted for cutbacks, remember?
Jesus Christ, she;s actually dumb enough to quote that post on her front page.
“Tomorrow on Hot Air, a picture of a poopy my dog done did.”
Jumping Jesus with a 48″ vertical and windmill dunk! The wingnuttia bloggers are all freaking out that McCain isn’t giving them their duly earned wet & sloppy blowjobs: http://blog.random-american.com/blog/?p=1341
Oh noes!!11!! They actually seem to think that McCain is some kind of crypto-pinko, and that the GOP has been bending over for the Demoncratic agenda the last 8 years? WTF?? In what parallel reality does the Patriot Act, the crazed spending on bullshit defense fatcat projects, shitting all over the environment and big-ass tax giveaways to rich fucks fit in with the Dirty Fucking Hippie Xmas wishlist? I had to bonk my head repeatedly on the keyboard just to try to cleanse Teh Stoopid from filming over my corneas.
I can’t figure out if they really are that out of touch with reality, or if this is some clever rhetorical device that they’re employing to try to prep the grounds for the meme that all that the Republicans have done to fuck the country right up the ass the last eight years was all actually done by the Democrats …
Also – if you haven’t checked out the latest Special Comment from Olbermann, well, it bears watching. Guys – link to it as a post on the main page, OK? Keith really goes off about the whole “giving up golf is a sacrifice equivalent to sending your child to die in a stupid, pointless war” thing.
My replican part. Let me show it to you.
Silly wordyeti.
You see, if you had be paying ANY attention at all to what the media tells you, you would have noticed that all these Democrats winning elections is bad news for Democrats, and great news for Republicans.
Democrats, being evil America-hating Communist Sharia Atheist Nazis, operate in what is know as “Bizzaro Politics”. They’re so evil and hateful, born not from loving mothers but instead forged directly from the fouled earth under Isengard, that reality itself simply cannot contain the pure quantity of their malevolence. As such, they must and do operate outside the realm of logic and reason.
To put it simply, the less representation they have in the government, the more power they wield within that government.
This obviously explains why, when the Republicans held the Presidency, the Supreme Court, and a commanding majority of the seats in both houses of Congress, the Democrats were finally able to spread their dark, gossamer wings of loathing and see that their sickly will be done, empty voids where should normally be eyes, black hearts racing with anticipation of the forth coming destruction of everything good and decent and wholesome.
Miss Maglalang’s Boy Hero, opining on his obsession for change:
For some peculiar reason, right wingers think contracting out = smaller government. They’re right in a way. The government opts out of managing, oversight, regulation, and accountability – all the important stuff while they hand over hundreds of billions in public money to corporations who have no interest or obligation to be accountable.
these people are beyond naive. they’re criminally stupid.
Also – if you haven’t checked out the latest Special Comment from Olbermann, well, it bears watching.
too bad he couldn’t have used the F word at the end, but otherwise, an outstanding and well-deserved diatribe.
Wait, so now suddenly they care about freedom? She’s not for illegal surveillance anymore? She supports habeas corpus and due process again?
Proceeds from the anthology, Children’s Letters to the Replican Part, will benefit Tom Delay’s Coalition for a Conservative Majority.
Errr………….isn’t that “Children’s Letters to the Repelican Part”? When I’m attacked by pelicans, I don’t wait for the government to help me, I stitch myself up and release the badgers on ’em. Go Michelle!!
She’s not very happy about McCain leaving her out of the blogger conference calls either.
OOOOOoooooohhhhh, that just makes me soooooOOOOoooo aaaaaangryyyyy.
</Marvin the
MartianMalkin>Boo-frickin-hoo indeed.
She’s not so happy about McCain leaving her out of the blogger conference calls, either.
OOOOOooooooohhhhhh, that makes me soooOOOOOoooo AAAAAAnnnnngryyyyyy.
</Marvin the
MartianMalkin>Boo-frickin-hoo indeed.
———————————
wordpress cannot defeat me that easily. hah.
fucking
pelicanswordpressShe’s not so happy about McCain leaving her out of the blogger conference calls, either.
OOOOOooooooohhhhhh, that makes me soooOOOOOoooo AAAAAAnnnnngryyyyyy.
/Marvin the
MartianMalkinBoo-frickin-hoo indeed.
I sincerely hope that the Republican Party responds to the incentives & disincentives clearly lain out for it, and divorces itself from being led & controlled by the nuttiest band of Southern extremist reactionary right wingers.
Surely there are some moderate conservatives in non-Southern (and outside a few Western ultra-right populist strongholds) who want to be able to compete against Democrats.
If so, and if they move in that direction, they will be able to compete with Democrats (even if simply because there always is an opportunity for an opposing party), and the nation will be the better for it. There has to be a conservative opposition, and I’d rather it be the old-fashioned moderate business types than the 30 year anti-New Dealer / anti-Civil Rights loonies we’ve had and to which the DLC Democrats largely conceded.
Fortunately, those free-lance nuts like Malkin have hitched all their diseased and raging horses to the Southern / Western revanchists, so they will not be at the lead of a resurgence of a more traditional Republican opposition.
BTW, I spint abut 10 menits laughfin at the lettr and lookgni at the tiytle aigin.
Replican Part? Whazzat? Like, Arvo Part’s brother? Or like, “I got yer replican part, hangin'”?
“I just know that government, in general, is inefficiant and wasteful and would like to see less governement programs instead of more.”
Michelle should move to Iraq— less government! more Second Amendment rights!
And the gubberment needs to stop wasting so much money on publik educashun!
Wait, so now suddenly they care about freedom? She’s not for illegal surveillance anymore? She supports habeas corpus and due process again?
She only supports that stuff when she knows they’ll be used in the service of Republicans. Now that there’s a good chance she’ll be in the crosshairs of the Patriot Act, she’ll start campaigning for it’s repeal.
“Not all conservatives are stupid, but stupid people are conservative.”
Can’t say it any better than Mr. Pope.
If my new my situation…
This should be Iris’ new catchphrase!
WordPress needs to let its captives free again, Gavin.
I hear the new Nexus-6 Republicans are indistinguishable from real humans.
A couple of nuggets from the NRCC thread.
Yes, I strongly encourage all self-respecting true conservatives and Malkinites to do this in November. Let your voices be heard!
This next one strips it down to the bare necessities, the simple bare necessities.
John Boyle is making sense. Pass it on!
Oh wow, man. The universe is drifting to the left…
Something tells me that this loon has a very broad definition of the phrase ‘bad guys’, one that includes everyone to the left of Adam Yoshida.
“Proceeds from the anthology, Children’s Letters to the Replican Part, will benefit Tom Delay’s Coalition for a Conservative Majority.”
All Yiddish solecisms forgiven.
This splits the other guy’s arrow, Mr. Hood. Well shot indeed.
Come on Snorghagen, by their standards Adam Yoshida is a dirty commie ’cause HE’S A CITIZEN OF SOVIET CANUCKISTAN.
Heh.
Michelle isn’t allowed on the conference calls, but the guys at Talking Points Memo are.
Heh. Heh heh heh.
I usually tell such people to fuck off to Somalia, the Libertarian Paradise.
John Boyle has convinced me. I resign.
That way I can spend more time listening to Arvo Part.
BWAHAHAHAHA!!!! Take that Michelle…and this, and this and this…..(just picture whatever abuse ya want).
Read my comments here liberals
http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/9446.html#comment-608520
and come back after you stop trembling. Try to think of something substantive to say, mmmkay? Or at least something funny.
From the WikiTravel entry on Mogadishu:
The safest way through Mogadishu is escorted by Ethiopian and official Somalian troops. Independent travel will most likely lead to your death. When being escorted, it is best to be in an armored car or, even better, a tank. Infantry are highly likely to get engaged in street battles, and an armored vehicle can provide far better protection.
Libertarian living at its finest!
Is WordPress now blocking or delaying posts with links? How does one get around that?
My ears popped from the sheer bathos of that description.
Perhaps he was referring to the Repelican Party?
Look, liberal kiddies! I made a poopy!
Oops, Para-Troll got there first.
The “flying monkeys” metaphor still gives me chuckles.
Wait — are there really right wingers who expect that terrorists would dare to follow up September 11, 2001, the most spectacular success of a terrorist attack that anyone could possibly accomplish without a nuclear weapons, space alien technology, or teams of flying wizards?
Like, Al Qai’da is going to follow up knocking down the World Trade Centers with jetliners with, what, small arms fire? A suicide bomber in a church or bank? Oh, yeah, I forgot: our intrepid investigators in Homeland Security and our clever strategy of turning Iraq into terrorist practice heaven somehow kept small cadres of fundamentalist knuckleheads from dare trying the same things they do every single day around the world.
Unless they have a plot to trigger the Yellowstone super-volcano or sink Florida into the sea, I get the feeling that the Al Qa’ida Grants Program for Dramatic Terrorist Attacks in the USA has not been receiving too many proposals worth reviewing.
goodgrief, there’s a lot of bitterness over there in Malkin-land. The word “change” unhinges them — they seem to think it means communism. Or Islamofascism. Or communist Islamofascism as articulated by Jeremiah Wright. Hard to keep up with the liberal agenda, but good to see the RINOs are all on board!
I don’t know what the fuck it’s doing, but it’s kind of annoying. I stepped in it good above, and it stinks. “Ooooohhhh, now you’ll post them all.” Oddly, the last one (obviously) wasn’t delayed at all. I had thought it was a unicode thing, but maybe not. From here on in, if WP doesn’t tell me I’m hosed, I will assume it’ll be posted eventually.
ugh.
A book came out last year in which the author hypothesizes that’s the reason AQ hasn’t tried to attack the US again. They set the bar too high and are now afraid to try anything that might be less spectacular. I’m surprised bin Laden didn’t take credit for Hurricanes Katrina and Rita. A lot of domb focks would have believed him.
fucking Repelicans.
Wordyeti, I always figured they were actually that out of touch with reality, except for a coupl’a smart ones who control all the others. They are an authoritarian movement, in other words.
Oh! The delicious schadenfreude! It is to die for!
(Rolls around on the floor like a cat in catnip)
Actually the Republicans should rename themselves the Repelicans! Repel! I Can!
More seriously, while the comments of these morons are so ridiculously funny, I have a feeling that a sizeable number of that group are about a hair’s breadth from becoming really dangerous, in a wannabe Eric Rudolph kind of way.
Try to think of something substantive to say, mmmkay? Or at least something funny.
Hey, you’re stealing my schtick. *I* tell people to make with the funny or leave.
Poo-flinging copy babboon. Make up your own funny.
Oh, I thought it was a reference to their pendulous throat-sacs.
I have a feeling that a sizeable number of that group are about a hair’s breadth from becoming really dangerous, in a wannabe Eric Rudolph kind of way.
I agree. There might be 99 Chad Castaganas for every real Rudolph, but that’s the kind of crap that’s swilling around just beneath the surface. The most capable and irony-impaired will just keep blowing shit up and mailing fake anthrax around until we get somebody in office who’s “tough on terrorism”.
Oh, I thought it was a reference to their pendulous throat-sacs.
Those are what lead me to call them “Redoublechins”, but “Repelicans” is better.
Well, pendulous throat-sacs and rotten fish breath are pretty repellent . . . No offense to actual pelican-Americans intended, who are fine feathered citizens.
I’ve felt for a while that all the kooks needed to start doing crazy shit again is a vocal leader, and lo and behold, Limbaugh seems to be trying to reprise his 90s-era incitement to violence act. I hope there is serious, extensive security at the Democratic convention.
“Lara’s Theme”? More like “Ten Cents a Dance”.
Michelle The $6-Million-Dollar Replican:
“Gentlemen, we can make her meaner than she was before. Meaner … stupider … uglier.”
Dear Truthbot:
Why feed a troll when you can barbecue it, I always say.
A) McCain SAYS he’ll chop earmarks, during an election campaign, a time renowned for bringing out the honesty that slumbers in vote-pimping pols … just like Bush’s pappy said “read my lips- no new taxes” … & I bet you opened wide for THAT bullshit too. Wanna buy a bridge in New York? Dirt cheap – & only slightly used.
B) Bush is NOT pursuing Bin Laden, hasn’t even PRETENDED to go after Bin Laden since he LET HIM GET AWAY in Tora Bora, has stated on the record that he doesn’t give a rat’s ass about Bin Laden, & dissolved the CIA’s OBL-Unit. Years ago. Reality – suck on some today!
C) “You can’t unblow a dog-whistle” – um, BHO’s character is about a million light-years ahead of the jet-trashing lobbyist-boning Keating-Five dolt the GOP is running with – you know, McCain, the guy that BEGGED the Dems to let him cross the floor a few years back? He’s a mentally-unstable two-faced pin-dick, & even the less brain-dead among your fellow neocons will tell you so, to your face.
D) The head of the Repubs stands in front of a pack of reporters & stamps on the floor like a 2-year-old having a tantrum & proclaims, “this is the floor – we’re UNDERNEATH the floor” in regards to the GOP’s fortunes. Is this perchance a clever ploy? What part of “So Fucked They Need A Pregnancy-Test” are you not getting here?
Do you even have a clue how much DROLLERY your retarded gibberish is generating here among the sentient-set? I’m sure you’ve got LOTS of brilliant repartee & devastating Secret Weapons O’ Wisdom to make us all “tremble” with hidden away in there SOMEWHERE – you just haven’t pulled it out yet, right? Like I’ve said before: feel free to keep it coming. Making malignant fucktards like you look pathetic is a GAS.
WordPress is brought to you by the makers of Agent Orange.
Yes, poor Mitch, not being invited to play with that LiberalFascist/RINO that its BBQ!
And eading some of the comments of her ADB!!(Anti-Debauchery Brigade!!) is more than funny. Good luck with that HairShirt in the Wilderness!! campaign kids!
Incontinentia Buttocks said,
May 18, 2008 at 8:52
Tom Cole is my Congressman. Other than his being a minor Tom Delay crony, I never understood how the guy ended up as chair of the NRCC. But now it seems that Cole may be the perfect captain to oversee the sinking ship of the GOP’s Congressional fortunes.
Hey Incontinentia, Tom’s my congressman too! We should have a Sadly!fest here with me, you and ,,,,,ME!
Is anyone running against his distracted self this year?
The GOP slogan: “Government is inefficient and wasteful and cannot be trusted unless of course, we are talking about waging wars, torturing people, and wiretapping phones, in which case, the government is always to be trusted, can do no wrong, bigger is always better, and no-bid contracts that lead to billions of dollars of waste are the prime example of the gov’t at its best.”
or, “The government can’t tell people what to do unless of course, its telling people that fags can’t marry and woman can’t have abortions! In that case, the government can completely dictate your private affairs as long as they let you keep your guns.”
“Kids who accidentally blow their brains out with daddy’s gun should be thankful they weren’t aborted.”
–
Back to Malkin. God bless her heart. I am so happy to hear that in an election year where 85% of the population hates the way the GOP has been running things, her motto is “iceberg in view! full steam ahead!”. If only she could convince McCain to be more like her and don a cheerleading outfit to stick it to the dems…
Replicants? I suspect Ms. Malkin couldn’t pass the Voight-Kampff test.
When you’ve dug so far you’ve hit bedrock, where do you go from there?
Knowing their horror of admitting they were wrong, I don’t see how then can do anything except a full scale “The problem is that we weren’t stupid enough!”
Hey hey hey hey.
The acronym ADB is spoken for ’round these parts, fella.
The GOP: Who you going to believe, me or your lying eyes?
Really?…..(sniff)….and here I thought it was an ingenious and invidious invention of my own!!!
Lying eyes, lying ears, lying autonomic functions
And my current congressperson is Ken “the Calvinist” Calvert but when I move, it’s then gonna be that big freaking crybaby, Darrell Issa:
http://www.perrspectives.com/blog/archives/001007.htm
I’ve felt for a while that all the kooks needed to start doing crazy shit again is a vocal leader, and lo and behold, Limbaugh seems to be trying to reprise his 90s-era incitement to violence act. I hope there is serious, extensive security at the Democratic convention.
If you LIE-bruls weren’t such babies, you’d see to it that everyone attending the convention had an M1 Battle Rifle™ strapped across their back. When are you gonna get the fact that the government can’t always be there to help you? If you commies had the sense to heavily arm yourself, you could take care of your own security and maybe get into a series of cool firefights with the zombie biker hoards that Limbaugh is trying to encourage to riot at the convention. Duh!!
There’s always ADD brad. Still available, last I checked.
Pffff, Rugged, you pussy. I never leave the house without two AK-47s (I duel wield them, bitch,) with six 100-round banana magazines, two claymore APMs on my back, and a bandoleer of lemon frags. Sure, I’m going to need major orthopedic surgery down the road as all that excess weight takes its toll on my tendons and joints, but dammit, I feel so macho! SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM ARRRGHH!
I never leave the house without two AK-47s (I duel wield them, bitch,) with six 100-round banana magazines, two claymore APMs on my back, and a bandoleer of lemon frags.
Might I suggest “back saver” style insole inserts made of C4?
The government doesn’t need to change. It just needs to change. See?
they were actually that out of touch with reality, except for a coupl’a smart ones who control all the others. They are an authoritarian movement, in other words.
Well, yeah. The whimpering and foot-stamping taking place at Malkin and other’s places is amusing, and it’s nice to fantasize about them all growing enough of a spine to actually back up their “we’re gonna take our ball and go home” rhetoric. At their core, they are a bunch of spineless, quivering fraidy-cats, and when November rolls around, they’re going to pull the lever for McCain, because their local Gauleiter tells them to.
The only members of the traditional GOP coalition who stand a good chance of defecting are the libertarians who might drift over to stand on their principles and yank it for Bob Barr…