Christ. A Darkness reference. I am depressed, Ace.

Menken. Heh.

you beat me to it, Legalize. BLOG OF THE YEAR!

Have you just gone ahead and emailed it to him, Gavin?

I mean, maybe he hasn’t actually SEEN it, y’know?

‘Cause I simply cannot believe that upon seeing it for even a few seconds, Ace will realize that there really is no substitute for brilliant design and competent execution…

mikey

By God, I *will* give it to him. Then there’ll be no excuse…

WTF— isn’t there enough room in his new graphics for a big bag of dicks?

As long as you’re helping folks, can you hook me up with some weed?

Ten years from now, Ace will still be trying to come up with a good website design.

Unless he admits the GREATNESS.

But then he wouldn’t be Ace anymore. *Conundrum*

“Every normal man must be tempted at times to wave his hand underneath the divider, tap his toe, assume the wide stance. and begin the GOP mating ritual.”

-Senator Larry Craig

soon Red State will be blaming liberal blogs for Ace’s inability to have a good site design.

I think it needs a little more cowbell.

Betcha a jelly donut that’s the only “Menken” quote Ace of “Spaids” knows.

In the United States, doing good has come to be, like patriotism, a favorite device of persons with something to sell.
H. L. Mencken

“Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hand and “hoist his flag”, if you know what I mean.”
– Hysterical Woman

Gavin:

If someone wanted to contact you about graphics work, whereabouts would they find your email addy?

The contact page’ll work.

Doesn’t Having ‘HQ’ in the title just automatically place his site in a treehouse with a big ‘NO GIRLS!’ sign on the door?

Every young republican man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin typing furiously, alone.

Ohh, Hysterical Woman just won.

Doesn’t Having ‘HQ’ in the title just automatically place his site in a treehouse with a big ‘NO GIRLS!’ sign on the door?

Dude, Ace’s new banner should totally have a “NO GIRLS” sign with the “R” written backwards. Why doesn’t it, Gavin?

And hey, billy…

*Inhales, passes it down*….

All I can do right now.

Shite-hot, indeed.

Yet another repuke role-playing army in his make-believe HQ. Enlist, you cheeto-eating wanker!

What a stupid liberal website! Got anything but hate? BTW, stop dissing my boyfriend!

“The contact page’ll work.”

Thanks. (Durp. I looked three times for contact info. Musta been the pinot. Yessh!)

[expanded Ace quote, btw]

This video below relates to absolutely nothing in the thread, but I just saw it 2 days ago and I still can’t stop laughing about it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUTWz7nu_wk

There are a few curse words so all you church employees turn the sound down to godly levels while watching.

I asked her, “Look, if you start to play with this, you’re not going to make it all girly are you? I don’t want it to look like Bethany’s MySpace page.”

I will say this. I salute Ace’s bravery in facing girl cooties to get him a new banner that, far as I can tell, looks much like the older one. And who is this “Bethany”, anyway?

She was offended by the question.

Well, you know how women are, can’t take a joke. It’s all Amanda Marcotte’s fault I betcha.

God almighty. A guy calling himself “Ace of Spades”, and he favorably quotes the Darkness. As a metalhead, I am ashamed. This would be like someone calling himself Mr. Scarface saying “Boy, that Sisqó is off the fucking CHAIN!”

Also, saying “Look, if you start to play with this, you’re not going to make it all girly are you?” about your cock is no way to lose your virginity, dude.

I hope that he doesn’t correct the spelling of Mencken’s name in the banner.

It’s the crowning touch. Makes the whole piece.

Don’t Play-Doh and Bacon need to be added to the banner somewhere?

Is Ace sure that’s a Menken quote ? It seems like more of a Manson quote.

Could that really be Marsden? We couldn’t be so lucky.

I think the banner needs breasts and a truck, maybe a Chevy.

What John said, maybe it IS just a Menken quote. Some douche named Menken.

I think the banner needs breasts and a truck, maybe a Chevy.

Nah, not whole bossoms. Just cleavage, and only a modicum of that. Remember, this guy’s a conservative, so he’s more excited by illusion than reality. Besides, nipples drive these guys frothing.

But it does need a big ol’ fuck-off pick-up truck with fog lights and a lift-kit under it and some Clawdawg Mudgrippers and a roll bar with fog lights and a 20-foot CB antenna to handle the kicker and those Yosemite Sam mudflaps that say “Back Off!” and a kickass sound system with a bass cannon and a toolbox but instead of an actual toolbox it’s a cooler fulla beer and Everclear for hunch punch.

That would be awesome. It’d be like being 16 all over again.

Roy has also applauded Ace’s New Space™.

I Da Ho said,

March 4, 2008 at 2:13

“Every normal man must be tempted at times to wave his hand underneath the divider, tap his toe, assume the wide stance. and begin the GOP mating ritual.”

-Senator Larry Craig

Gak, snort, milk, nose–Which one of you said that?!?! Fess up, I want to nominate you for a Nobel Peace Prize!

I asked her, “Look, if you start to play with this, you’re not going to make it all girly are you? I don’t want it to look like Bethany’s MySpace page.”

I have nothing to add, other than Ace obviously never learned how to talk to girls in high school university the real world scenic mom’s basement.

Here are some more “Menken” quotes for Ace to go through and figure out which are specifically about him:

“Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.”

“It is the dull man who is always sure, and the sure man who is always dull.”

“Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.”

“The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated.”

“The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.”

“The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”

“In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.”

“Most people want security in this world, not liberty.”

“The one permanent emotion of the inferior man is fear – fear of the unknown, the complex, the inexplicable. What he wants above everything else is safety.”

“War will never cease until babies begin to come into the world with larger cerebrums and smaller adrenal glands.”

“Whenever you hear a man speak of his love for his country, it is a sign that he expects to be paid for it.”

Why pay a designer for that? I think I still have some old PeeChees from junior high with some lovingly sketched Kiss and Iron Maiden logos on them. I can scan them and send them along if Ace likes.

Nah, not whole bossoms. Just cleavage, and only a modicum of that.
Like this?

Except for the part where Ace wets his pants, it’s perfect.

Ace’s banner needs some playdoh and bacon. Or have I got the wrong wingnut?

Smut Clyde,
Nah, man, that’s much too woman shown for this bunch of manly men, not to mention too much actual boob. Just the cleavage. And the truck could be leaping out of the cleavage. The truck’s driven by Chuck Norris and Toby Keith.

Dammit, Clyde, when the hell did my ex wife pose for THAT?

Was I there?

mikey

The correct spelling of proper nouns is the liberal fascism of graphic design.

OMG!! Here’s Ace’s Truck!!

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B000FBUF2M?smid=A39CZC0BLMZ66Q&tag=nextag-toys-20&linkCode=asn

That’s a lot of junk under that trunk.

About that truck that’s leaping out of the cleavage…it needs to have a Confederate flag decal in the rear window or on the front license plate.

And also, gun racks.

Whoever posted the Fuck You Baltimore youtube…that totally cracked my shit up. Thank you, the link is being emailed to all the people I really care about.

Note Ace’s skull’s similarity to the insignia of Rio di Janeiro’s “BOPE” (Batalhão de Operações Policiais Especiais) division as seen in the film Tropa de Elite aka Elite Squad.

http://tinyurl.com/3ajqol

For the playing card, perhaps one of these in light of this.

Just the cleavage. And the truck could be leaping out of the cleavage.
Hmph. Do your own Image search for “Lady+Luck” then.
I’m voting for the Old Masters.

That’s not her, she’d be posting way more frequently if it were her.

OTOH, maybe she’s emailing your boss right now!

Might I suggest this as the template for the truck leaping out of the cleavage? Just cut the ambulance and paste in the truck.

Nothing you fine folks are dreaming up can compare to this.
~

I asked her, “Look, if you start to play with this, you’re not going to make it all girly are you? I don’t want it to look like Bethany’s MySpace page.”

Ace, you’re Gay.

Perhaps he meant to quote Alan Menken.

Ace, you’re Gay.

He’s the Ace of Gay!

Oh, and speaking of anagram fun: Ace of Spades = Facade Posse.

Ace is playing pirate wayyyy to much.

The WTC towers in the eagle’s tear = Dinner all over my keyboard.

And

ACE OF SPADES = FECES ASS POD

Looksism Alert!!!

Ace O Spades has to be one of the ugliest male wingnut bloggers out there. But Charles Johnson’s feminine facade always draws me in.

Oops, where’d that extra “S” come from? OK.

PADS O FECES

Hmmm. Maybe there’s some use, maybe not in the banner, but somewhere, for the Play-Doh Breakfast Time Set, complete with, well, you know.

Wait, Liberrocky?

Liberrocky’s banner work.

“every normal man” doesn’t apply to Ace. He really should remove the quote and replace it

…with something Manson said

“Look down at me and you see a fool;
look up at me and you see a god;
look straight at me and you see yourself”

well, maybe not that last line

Maybe I’m reading into this, but is he proudly proclaiming that he’s hoisting a white banner?

This is the party of secret flag-pin communication.

Nevermind the Ace of Spades site banner, what about Ace of Spades headgear?

I always go to the Psywarrior archives for all my skull / Ace-of-Spades requirements.

Ace of Spades headgear

Jesus, I was half-expecting one of those face-dildo apparatuses. I don’t know why, but this thing seems very Ace.

I told him that it was a bad idea and a case of transposed symbolism. We Americans look at the ace of spades as the death card, but to the Vietnamese it is more like a phallic symbol and if anything might suggest that we were involved in necrophilia.

Well that’s just peachy. There’s nothing like the specter of imperialist running dog foreign corpse humpers for the ol’ propaganda campaign.

After WWII (possibly) has America been in a war where we understood the guys were were fighting?

anybody have a photo of Ace handy?

Just use a pic of Ace Frehley

i sure do suck at puppetry.

So, I think Ace O’ Spuds could have won that video kerfluffle y’all just had with that “the darkness” video.

Wow. I mean just, wow. I mean sure, they all had horrible music, but did they have a naked guy getting felt up by Barney? Or was that Grimace? And the squid humping the space ship. Priceless. And I thought you had them with Phillip Michael Thomas.

It must be some kind of savant he’s got….

After a quick perusal of the ace’s site, it should be obvious why he could never use your fine logo. The flames on the letters would set all the strawmen ablaze, and then where would he be?

Also, bacon

I spent all day trying to remember the lyrics brought to mind by that Psywarrior site…

Only lonely parties start
At the dark side of this world
The gangster with the golden arm
Plays death cards for the girls
I saw the final vicar make confession to a dancer
He stood upon the bridge at dawn
And the dancer kissed my hand sir

The Saga of the Modified Logo is still one of the funniest things I’ve seen on the intertubes ever. 😀

I vote for a pickup truck with those metallic sillhouettes of wimmin on the mudflaps.

Heh. I said mudflaps.

Actually, gbear, I believe this is Ace’s truck:

http://www.brockport.edu/ehs/Images/safety%20violations/Welding%20under%20vehicle.jpg