I would like to propose a Glenn Reynolds p-shop contest next, where the goal is to ‘shop the Perf’s head onto the body of a famous robot/cyborg.

This is just another case of sexist, racist, anti-semitic liberal fascism. You are projecting your authoritarian desires onto innocent conservative freedom-fighters who are opposed to your totalitarian utopia. You’re a hippie stoner and you hate your parents. You suffer from Bush Derangement Syndrome and it’s possible that you’re a homosexual. You’re an authoritarian anarchist and an Islamist atheist. If you deny it, you’re in denial and possible a Nazi.

Thus ends my objective, conservative analysis of your problems with Pam Oshry.

Here’s an oldie but goodie of the perfesser:

http://www.exposetheleft.com/old/2005/05/14/in-defense-of-instapundit/

Originally an entry in a photoshop contest from a few years ago, but I forget where.

I heard that Pam flipped out and shaved her head.

Oh, she shaved all right, but only so she could use Bolton’s mustache is a merkin.

At last, Paula Zahn tells me what to think about black culture.

shit, (stumbling, sound of bottles being kicked across the floor, unknown liquids forming puddles on the rug..)

god… first thing on a morning like this, pam atlas, urp..

merkin?

ahh, that’s better

Pammy looks better when you’re wearing Beer Goggles at bar closing.

*shudder* The licking! Make it stop!

Whuf. That’s just nasty. Naaaaas-TEE!

Hip-hop — art or poison, bitchuzz?

Yes. Next question?

kingubu’s link above on the etymology of merkin says that it’s derived from an alteration of malkin, lower-class woman, mop, from Middle English. I’ll leave it up to the Sadly, No! guys to make use of this info.

Pammy looks better when you’re wearing Beer Goggles at bar closing.

Yeah, but the shrieking harpy part will cut through any alcohol buzz.

Davis, the Sadly, No! guys have already made use of that info. They are totally on top of any opportunity for cheap shot-style snark.

Sadly, No! should hold a Roger “L.” Simon writing contest.

Go on, look what he’s spurted out now. http://www.washingtonian.com/articles/mediapolitics/3444.html I would think his kneepads must be pretty shiny after that.

It’s a little fantasy about John McCain as he prepares for his inauguration in 2009. The Democrats were ahead, see, “[a]nd then came the day that once was known as Halloween and forever afterward was called 10/31.”

Yes. Really. Fortunately, everyman Timothy Roop is carrying his Smith & Wesson 17-shot Sigma 9mm pistol, and…. well, I’ve already given too many spoilers, haven’t I?

So malicious (it’s crotch rot)
So malicious (I fill my pipe with rock, rock)
So malicious (Steyn wants a taste of what I got)
I’m Pamalicious (b-b-b-b-baste me, baste me)

I think that’s the single worst thing I’ve ever read, Tom Allen. It made a mix of blood and shit pour from my eyes.

It’s a little fantasy about John McCain as he prepares for his inauguration in 2009. The Democrats were ahead, see, “[a]nd then came the day that once was known as Halloween and forever afterward was called 10/31.�

…wait…. haven’t Dick Cheney and the other wingtards been telling us forever, that the terrists WANT Democrats elected?

So if the Dems were ahead, they were going to try to, what, elect the Democrats by making an attack? Doesn’t this point out that they’ve been lying about the motivations of the terrorists all along?

Jeezus. For years I’ve operated on the assumption that the 14-year-olds had cornered the market on cheesy wish-fulfillment fiction, and then along comes Simon. What a creepy, pathetic, sycophantic little crush-monger he is.

Lemme get this straight. In the horrific terrorist attack that causes the Dems to lose the election and will forever be refered to as 10/31, the terrorists blow a hole in one end of the St. Louis arch. Nobody dies but the terrorists. Nothing is destroyed. Jeez, it really doesn’t take much to terrify these dogs, does it…

mikey

Is hip hop art? Not only is it art but it’s been best the source for protest music for years now. The Roots, Dead Prez, the Coup.

Wasn’t it just a few years ago that Spain got loads of crap for having their election swayed by a terrorist attack?

The only reason she’s not in a mental hospital is because of her cans.

Thanks to Tom Allen for the laugh riot Roger Simon link. Stupendously looney.

Meanwhile, I’ve acknowledged the Great Kunstwerk’s fans at Marita’s place.

Having that harpy stare at me when I log on to “Sadly, No!” almost made me spew coffee all over my monitor at work. Please, a little warning next time?

Still, the merkin reference was a much-needed salve for my burning eyes.

Youse all is just a bunch of dhimmiecrats!

P.S. I meant:

Youse all is just a bunch of dhimmiecrats!1!!squarerootof121!!!11

Hmm. Did I miss some sort of blog-cation or something? I mean, the entire population of proprieters at Sadly, No, between ’em, can come up with beer and an old rehash of a pammy p’shop contest in going on three days. So, finding nothing of real interest here, I go over to World o’Crap to catch up with sz and Scott. Guess what? Nothing since Monday! Hell, I get crap for not writing in my crappy little blog regularly, and I’m way more current than S, N. Are you guys real busy or something? ‘Cause if I’m gonna have to find ways to amuse myself this weekend without my favorite stops in blogistan, I think somebody should have warned me to buy more scotch and a yoyo or something…

Just Sayin…

mikey

Jeez. No love from Mikey. I’m feeling re-hashy and unwanted…

[sniffles and runs off to her room, sobbing]

Nah, jeez, ma’am. It was good. I guess it just wasn’t enough to feed my addiction…

Er, was that an “…it’s not you, it’s me…” moment?

Sorry…

mikey

Hmmm… not sure what to tell you. It is a bit quiet around here. I could volunteer to go over to RenewAmerica and try to treatment on one of their nutter columnists, but I’m not sure I could do it justice.

Ugh. Try to do a treatment.

Or better yet, you could go all SWAT and rescue the Preview Button from the terrah-ists that are holding her hostage, efficiently double-tapping the Tangos and taking the filthy, emaciated button out to the ambulance? That’d be coool…

mikey

Yup, you can tell things are piling up here in SadNoistan when digby has to step in to handle the poop jokes.

mikey,,i don’t really know what you just said, but it was very pleasant to read.

i am falling short in my efforts to amuse myself

should we send out a search party?

i’m going out. to the outdoors.

i hope the boys are allright..

I think the preview button is out of my reach, Mikey. If you want some entertainment though, head here. It’s one of the best pieces of random nonsense I’ve read in quite a while. A taste:

Obama, who vociferously supports crushing the heads of infants as they are being born, instead wanted to discuss “how we want to put an end to the nasty slash-and-burn, trivialized politics of the last couple of decades.”

It should keep you busy for a few minutes, at least.

And we were promised a lengthy take-down a la what Pasty got, about David Frum by HTML Mencken months ago.

Uh oh, it appears the people are revolting!

(I’ve always LOVED that line)..

mikey

Mikey, while you wait for people to start posting here again, you might enjoy the wonderful site Instaputz linked to: http://instaputz.blogspot.com/2007/02/wingnutopedia.html

Contardopedia!â„¢(dot com)

The conservapedia is going to be the gift that keeps on giving, isn’t it?

Don’t like reality? Redefine it all to suit yourself! Sweet!

Thanks, Athlete. I needed to know that there is now a site called “Conservapedia” that goes to great pains to look like Wiki’s site, and that its front-page teasers are about things like “on this day in history the Boy Scouts were formed” and “Did you know that faith is a uniquely Christian concept?”

Funny, though. Thought I’d check out their take on some of the movement’s contemporary heroes and found no entries — none at all! — for Foley or Haggard or even Scooter Libby . . .

Add some cellulite to the legs by transplanting the fat that makes up her brain.

Smiling Mortician, they’re really at their best when they’re dealing with history:

“The Mexican Revolution 1910 (1910-1920) was brought on by a disagreement between the people of Mexico and their dictator, Porfirio Diaz. It resulted in his overthrowing and flee to Paris, France. During his ruling, Mexico’s wealth was even more undistributed than it is today.”

http://www.conservapedia.com/Mexican_Revolution

How mature!!!

Maybe next you all can order a bunch of pizza to the neighbors, or make some crank calls, or talk about all the weird named beers you like, because after all you are nerds and beer isn’t just for drinking it’s for discussing while not drinking, or you can complain about how all the cheerleaders are whores and/or tools of the patriarchy because they laugh at you in the halls and stuff.

Just like high school

From “Examples of Bias in Wikipedia”
“5. Wikipedia often uses foreign spelling of words, even though most English speaking users are American. Look up “Most Favored Nation” on Wikipedia and it automatically converts the spelling to the British spelling “Most Favoured Nation”, even there there are far more American than British users. … Conservapedia favors American spellings of words.”
Or not bothering with the fascist liberal rules of grammar and spelling at all.
Why does illiteracy make people think they’re eloquent, convincing arguers?

man! did i pick a good time to come in!

HI ANNIEANGEL!

are you really a crazy person?
say something to me, look over here, a penny!

8. Gossip is pervasive on Wikipedia. Many entries read like the National Enquirer. For example, Wikipedia’s entry on Nina Totenberg states, “She married H. David Reines, a trauma physician, in 2000. On their honeymoon, he treated her for severe injuries after she was hit by a boat propeller while swimming.” That sounds just like the National Enquirer, and reflects a bias towards gossip. Conservapedia avoids gossip and vulgarity, just as a true encyclopedia does.

Don’t listen to those splitters Annie!

Look! A nickel! A nice shiny nickel!

http://www.conservapedia.com/Ancient_History_Terms

Chronological Order

3500 BC

3000 BC

2500 BC

2000 BC

1500 BC

.
.
.

or you can complain about how all the cheerleaders are whores…

Good point, Annie!

Now if you could only learn to bake a decent pie.

Conservapedia favors American spellings of words

It’s about time someone stood up for the American language! What do the English know about that?

http://bloggingpoints.blogspot.com/2006/04/how-to-be-good-christian-wife.html

That’s the link to the original article, Harpy. Make sure to read the comments, all the loonies came out to piss on Christ.

I mean, what ever happened to “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all!”? Why do you people always bark and scream if people who are not you have something to say?

Bark, scream and photoshop…but you dont’ actually DO anything. I have yet to see anything writen by a liberal that isn’t just so much sound and fury.

All you know how to do is bash. It’s been keeping you all very busy for a long time now, and you’ve forgotten how to do anything else.

Here’s you nickel Annie.

If you want another you’re gonna have to get me some dessert.

I go to AnnieAngel’s site for the shower of roses. It is enough. I am a simple soul.

wearing a 12-box of Harpoon IPA with eyeholes poked into it.

Another good reason to avoid beer that comes in plastic rings.

what’d i miss?!?

holy hell! i’d have come up with a quarter, at least!

annie, please. direct a comment towards me. your site is the most awesome.
if jesus was a psychotic wingnut chick, he would totally be like you.

WOOF! YOWL!!

lark’s tongues, badger’s noses, get ’em while they’re hot

That’s the link to the original article, Harpy.

The circularity, it burns. Just like those buns…get yur @ss movin’, girl! Teh oven is waitin’!

It don’t say nuthin’ about lark’s vomit on the box.

een dode kooker.

knapperige kikker

i may have to call myself that from now on..

“knapperige kikker ale”

god i am feeble.

why does the u toobs give me only 3 more videos when i clck on page 2 of what it says are 4000 videos?

Just like high school

And, just like high school, you can be the crazy Goth girl who cuts patterns into her skin with a pocket knife and calls it “art”, and drinks animal blood to pretend she’s a vampire.

Or you could be the other kind of crazy girl we all avoided because all she ever wanted to talk about was “Jayyzzuss!”.

Did someone say pie?

Wow.

All you know how to do is bash. It’s been keeping you all very busy for a long time now, and you’ve forgotten how to do anything else.

My psycho sweetie, this isn’t the only non-wingnut blog on the intertubes. If you want policy wonkery, if you even know what the hell that means, go somewhere else. But please return from time to time to entertain us.

wow.
no,really.

Pie Part Two (little chocolate slivers), Pie III (won’t somebody think of the children!!!)

Who knew the contents of he pie princess’ subconscious was right there on YooTube for all to see?

Where should I go? Atrios? Pandagon??

XD

I mean, I should be able to ask any of you leftwingnuts what your plans are to fix Iraq and get more than “BRING HOME THE TROOPS NOW!!@@!#” But none of you have a clue. I’ve asked over and over. LOL, I asked a popular poster long ago over on Atrios what her plan would be if the troops did come home RIGHT NOW. Her answer was she’d through a party. I don’t think she understood my question. If she did, it shows how little she cares about Iraqi civillian life that she’d party while they were taken over and killed by Shiite nutbar Islamifascist extremists. One poster told me Bush made the mess he can fix it. I said fine make him President for life then or at least vote Republican if you don’t think that a Dem should need to FIX the problem in Iraq.

It’s like it doesn’t matter to any of you that Iraq is a mess and that if we leave it that way and don’t fix it the entire Islamic world is going to go insane and fight it out and Iran will bomb Israel and Israel will loose it and then it’s going to be time for Jesus to come back.

For me this is a good thing, but for all of you, it’s eternity in Hell.

You’d think you’d be working harder for a solution instead of photoshopping pictures of bloggers and drinking gay beer.

It’s like it doesn’t matter to any of you that Iraq is a mess and that if we leave it that way and don’t fix it the entire Islamic world is going to go insane and fight it out and Iran will bomb Israel and Israel will loose it and then it’s going to be time for Jesus to come back.

For me this is a good thing, but for all of you, it’s eternity in Hell.

Shorter annienutcase: Oppose the surge, so I can get raptured!

got to try that gay beer. experiment a bit.

now, help me here. what is a good christian girl doing up in the middle of the hight, ranting around a bunch of hostile, drunk, leftist-anarcho-syndicalists anyway?

now, help me here. what is a good christian girl doing up in the middle of the hight, ranting around a bunch of hostile, drunk, leftist-anarcho-syndicalists anyway?

Annienutcase is a christian version of Fran Drescher. Right now she’s sitting at the computer with a cigarette and a bottle of gin.

Annie, honestly dear, you should not go to atrios. STAY.
while you may not agree with or understand the things you read hear, you will, if you listen closely, hear the faint sound of reason. and perhaps it will plant a seed to someday lift you out of your ignorance and fear
amen

Why do all these hefeweizen keep sucking my cock?

Stravo,

Of course I want to get raptured. On the other hand, even the death of godless sinners is heartbreaking to me, and the deaths of millions of people in the middle east and around the world if we pull out RIGHT NOW as you libs chant over and over, paving the way for a power hungry and delusional Shiite nutbar population to rule Iraq, doesn’t make me feel like throwing a party.

I guess it’s just me.

Annie, honestly dear, you should not go to atrios. STAY.

She’s already a well-known troll over there. But her insanity is muted by the sheer volume of comments and the incoherence of her ramblings. The pro trolls there drown her out of attention.

kingbu. hear! hear!

Of course I want to get raptured.

You’re mentally ill. Seek help.

Don’t call me a troll, Stravo. You don’t post at Atrios. I’m a well loved member of the community over there.

I only post here because of my undying love for Brad R, and my affection for Mdhatter.

Evidence that I’m right:

Stravo resorts to bashing , typical leftist strategy when confronted with a strong Christian woman.

stavro, i’ll learn.

it’s pretty shocking to see.
i feel like i’m making fun of someone with down’s syndrome or something…

Stravo resorts to bashing

You’re right. It’s not insane to believe you’ll someday be vanished from your clothes and whisked into the sky. Why, I happen to believe that the Flying Spaghetti Monster will one day wrap a tentacle around me, and yank me into the Great Cosmic Pasta Sauce, where I’ll enjoy Parmesan Heaven for all eternity.

Annie, your comments more closely belong at this site.

That spaghetti monster thing would get your ass kicked in grade school never mind high school, it’s just that lame. 🙂

But hey, it’s your belief and you’re entitled to burn for it. I’m not going to bash you for holding it though. You have free will and free speech and I respect both.

Linky no worky. S,N! screwy.

can i just interject here and say that i’ll agree not to interrupt this sketch for 2 shillings, and tuppance.

can i just interject here and say that i’ll agree not to interrupt this sketch

I see annie’s comments all the time, and she’s normally tolerable. it’s when she decides to tell everything that if they don’t believe in her particular imaginary friend that they’re wretched human beings that I feel compelled to tell her to STFU.

teh

If you don’t believe that Jesus is the Son of God, you’re going to Hell. That is the TRUTH. If that TRUTH scares you, if it makes you mad, it’s because you KNOW that your soul is a filthy rag and your heart is empty and your name is NOT written in the Book of Life. You KNOW you havent repented your sins, you REVEL in your sins, you gossip and backbite and are truly rotten people and a day of reckoning IS coming and your knees WILL bend unto the Lord and ON THAT DAY you will remember this conversation and then Jesus will tell you He doesn’t know you and you will be cast into the Lake of Fire forever and ever, Praise GOD.

I don’t make the rules, I just make sure you know them. Now REPENT and ask Jesus to forgive you your SINS, and I’m sure they are many and varied.

this is too good.

my filthy rag of a soul yearns for the cleansing fire of the chlorox of the triumphant…uh
He knows me and gave my name to john ashcroft, but yay, do not fear the gay beer for..

You KNOW you havent repented your sins, you REVEL in your sins, you gossip and backbite and are truly rotten people and a day of reckoning IS coming and your knees WILL bend unto the Lord and ON THAT DAY you will remember this conversation and then Jesus will tell you He doesn’t know you and you will be cast into the Lake of Fire forever and ever, Praise GOD.

The good stuff. 🙂

People aren’t kidding when they say annie sounds like a 12 year old. I used to talk like that when I was a brainwashed child.

More bashing. Yawn. No one listens to bashing. You should have learned that as a brainwashed child.

it’s “poke-a-rabid-looney” night here at SN! and things are really heating up.. first up, the duchess of jesus.
she’s known to be a slow starter, but by the fourth G&T, she’s really hit her stride
and now, down to the field. take it away stavro…

Why not just call me a cunt?

annie, far be it from me to give advice,..but,
“bashing” seems not quite to get to the essence of what’s being done, i’d go with “humiliating” or something in that shade.
it goes with your eyes..

whoa, i need to get to bed on that note.

i was thinking more, “wrong”, than “cunt”, but

i was thinking more, “wrong�, than “cunt�, but

She’s crazy. She’ll say the strangest things out of nowhere.

how do crazy people get computers?
is there some program?

if i knew how to italicize this would be so much more readable..

see?

Guys, Annie isn’t just your regular type of troll- she is a meta-troll. This whole shctick is designed to get you to buy a “I hate Shoelimpy” t-shirt, or the ever-popular “only whores serve frozen orange juice”. My personal favorite, though, is the “only sluts initiate sex” sexy black thong with red lace. I felt a strange urge to buy, but quelled it. Annie, you need to do a better job at this. The posts here were better than they have been recently, but still…they have been sucking even more than usual lately. I realize that is probably your point, but a dash of subtle, well, meta-ness would do you well. The joke has been played, you have to work from there.

“My personal favorite, though, is the “only sluts initiate sexâ€? sexy black thong with red lace. I felt a strange urge to buy, but quelled it. ”

You’re an idiot.

http://www.cafepress.com/bloggingpoints.56270382

[…] the Atlas Pam photoshop contest was such a rousing success, I think it’s time to do another one, this time featuring Glenn Harlan Reynolds, a.k.a. The […]

I’m bringin’ annie back
These muthafuckahs don’t know how to snack.

If you don’t believe that Jesus is the Son of God, you’re going to Hell. That is the TRUTH. If that TRUTH scares you, if it makes you mad, it’s because you KNOW that your soul is a filthy rag and your heart is empty and your name is NOT written in the Book of Life. You KNOW you havent repented your sins, you REVEL in your sins, you gossip and backbite and are truly rotten people and a day of reckoning IS coming and your knees WILL bend unto the Lord and ON THAT DAY you will remember this conversation and then Jesus will tell you He doesn’t know you and you will be cast into the Lake of Fire forever and ever, Praise GOD.

Say, annie, liebchen… if I may be so bold as to ask… how do you know ANY of that is true? See, there’s this thing that can apply to stuff written in books… it’s called LYING. It’s a little something that I’m quite well acquainted with. This wacky “rapture” thing you seem so enamored with has very little support in the so-called holy writings you seem to think answer all questions, particularly in the early writings of the church fathers. It isn’t until the 17-1800s that the term starts cropping up regularly, often in accounts that wildly contradict one another. So, which of those accounts do you subscribe to?
I guess my question to you is, “Why should anyone believe any of the rather fantastic things you claim as TRUTH any more than they might believe silly things like the Flying Spaghetti Monster to be TRUE?”
I’d be delighted if you could formulate a cogent response, but what I’m really expecting is more vicious invective.

That is the TRUTH. If that TRUTH scares me, if it makes me mad, it’s because I KNOW that all those capital letters are likely to use up the last of the black ink in the printer.

Wow, you’re way too cool, fakesatan, with your cool handle and your viciously invective way of ending posts.

Why are you calling the early writings of the Church fathers “holy?” Huh? Which one of them was JESUS??????

JESUS said about the RAPTUREin the GOSPEL OF LUKE 17:30-37

30Even thus shall it be in the day when the Son of man is revealed.

31In that day, he which shall be upon the housetop, and his stuff in the house, let him not come down to take it away: and he that is in the field, let him likewise not return back.

32Remember Lot’s wife.

33Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.

34I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left.

35Two women shall be grinding together; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

36Two men shall be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

37And they answered and said unto him, Where, Lord? And he said unto them, Wheresoever the body is, thither will the eagles be gathered together.

So PUT THAT IN YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT!!!!

And BY THE WAY, nothing you quoted in that fancy block quote has ANYTHING TO DO with the RAPTURE, that is all ELEMENTARY study from the book of REVELATION on JUDGEMENT DAY!!!

Take THAT!!!@!@!@!@!

35Two women shall be grinding together
I lost my concentration at this point.

34I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed;

Why are two men in bed together? I thought that Teh Gehy was verboten.

O Pie Deus!

If heaven is full of Annie Angels, then I would definitely prefer HELL.

Annie – is there a reason you are so vile? Don’t you think you could perhaps be a little bit tolerable, a little bit nice? Bees to honey and all that shit.

If you are a representative for Christ, then no one, I mean NO ONE, will ever want to become a Christian.

You are the absolute WORST Christian I have ever encountered. Did Jesus use language like you? No.

Was he an abusive sex freak? NO!

Seriously. If being a Christian means trying to bring others to Christ, then YOU HAVE FAILED.

Being a Christian does not mean LORDING IT OVER EVERYONE ELSE. I don’t recall Jesus doing immature happy-dances telling everyone that disagreed with him they were going to hell all the time.

You are more like the representative for the anti-Christ. Way to go.

Abusive sex freak????? I think you’re talking about your mama.

It rubs the lotion on it’s skin or else it gets golden showers from syph-infected male whores.