*hurls into the wastebasket*

If there’s one thing Republicans don’t have, it’s baggage they want kept secret. Am I right or am I right?
…What’s that now?

I didn’t think they had anyone more rediculious to run then Bush, but Santorum or Allen just may be it.

Seems worth encouraging this guy. I’m going to write him a “right on!” e-mail right now.

What does the 3 Bong Jackpot pay?

Cheney/Bolton ’08!

Obama with baggage?

Obama is toting the black man’s burden.

I will write my first-ever check to the RNC if they promise to nominate an Allen/Santorum ticket in 2008. And not just some piddly fifty bucks, no, I’m talking about a big fucking check. Sell my car if I have to.

Oh, please! Oh, please! Let the presents just keep on coming!!

if they promise to nominate an Allen/Santorum ticket in 2008

No, wouldn’t it be more fun to watch them go at each other in the primary?

mikey

Well, a dream come true would be to watch them eviscerate each other in the primary and THEN team up for the ticket . . .

I whole-heartedly agree with Levin. The future of the conservative movement rests in the hands of George Allen and Rick Santorum. Allen and Santorum should set the standard for future Republican Party candidates. Even I, as a non-Republican, can get behind that.

I love being so bipartisan. I am simply trying to get the Republican Party get back on track. I want to help. Whee.

Allen/ Santorum/ McCain in a three way cage match.

What does the 3 Bong Jackpot pay?

Enough for a walk-in closet.

Love the graphic Gavin! Hi everyone! I miss you guys – I wish I was around more. work has been so busy.

I will write my first-ever check to the RNC if they promise to nominate an Allen/Santorum ticket in 2008.

Please, God, no. If anybody would elect those jackasses, it would be the modern GOP which in 2004 elected George Bush, despite the fact that the rest of the world knew he was a dangerous loon.

I’m not willing to risk it. Can they just nominate a couple of reasonable conservatives and we can, you know, do that thing where we attempt to persuade the electorate on the basis of our theories of governance?

(Apologies. It’s the new meds. They’re making me optimistic this week, I think.)

Instead of the bongs there should be wingnuts on that slot machine. Bongs are too nice to be associated with wingnuts.

After reading Levin’s comments, my brain hurts. Just trying to wrap my obviously feeble intellect around comments that idiotic is an exercise in futility.

That said, I’m all for it. I could think of nothing better than an Allen/Santorum ticket in 2008.

“vacance”

Sweet!!!

Can they just nominate a couple of reasonable conservatives and we can, you know, do that thing where we attempt to persuade the electorate on the basis of our theories of governance?

D. Sidhe, whatever meds you’re on, I’m wondering whether you could spare a few? It’s not just the optimism, which I frankly admire. No, it’s the prospect of “a couple of reasonable conservatives” that’s got me stumped. Can you come up with two nationally prominent Rs for the ticket who could be termed reasonable? And I’m not talking reasonable in comparison to, oh, I dunno, Cheney and Rove, I’m talking actual reasonableness here.

Oh — and no fair putting forward someone like Chafee, who pretty much said this week that he’s a closeted dem.

The fact is that he is correct. Real Americans in the heartland will revolt against the liberal putsch that has just been foysted on us. We’re not going to take it.

The fact is that this travesty of an election will be overturned once the irregularty is investigated and the bias exposed.

We’re not going to take it.

The little known fact is Gary Ruppert ghostwrote the rock opera “Tommy.”

D. Sidhe, however optimistic your new meds are making you, they’re nothing compared to the strength of Gary’s.

The fact is we Democrats in Ohio and Missouri and Indiana just kicked wingnut behind.

Get used to it, Gary. It’s a shame you guys were allowed to do so much damage before your masks were fiinally torn off.

Real Americans in the heartland will revolt against the liberal putsch that has just been foysted on us.

Foysted [sic] on us by who, exactly, Gary? By those voters in such liberal enclaves as:
Ohio?IndianaMissouriMon-fucking-tana?

No “heartland” there, nossir.

Hunh … that was supposed to be a pretty bulleted list …

Bullets are never pretty, Foobarski.

The fact is, Gary, that like 70’s era squishy liberals, batshit insane bloodthirsty but bad at war neo-cons have been sent to your Dustbin of History.
You are now an anachronism, Gary. Move on, old man.

The fact is that he is correct. Real Americans in the heartland will revolt against the liberal putsch that has just been foysted on us.

Sorry, Gary. Your “Real Americans” already revolted. They were revolted by the death, the greed, the lies, the hot gay sex. The sad thing (for you) is that it wasn’t a “liberal putsch”. It was an “american putsch”. All sorts of people, liberal, conservative, religious, atheist, rich and poor were unwilling to allow the criminal thugs any more opportunity to destroy our country and eviscerate our constitution.

We’re not going to take it.

Gary? You’re a Twisted Sister fan? Do you wear the makeup? I’d like to see your wardrobe, dood…

mikey

Is Gary for real? He must be some sort of comic foil The Sadly No! folk created to simulate the “back-wall” of the right-wing echo-chamber’s thought process.

When I get home, I going to sic my Roomba of Historyâ„¢ on Gary.

Bullets are never pretty, Foobarski.

Ah, Mortician. Je dois être en désaccord.

.308180gr Jacketed Spitzer Boattails are very pretty. Carry about five of ’em around in your pocket, hold ’em in your hand, rattle ’em together like worry beads. They’re shiny, heavy for their size, smooth, eleganly shaped and very satisfying to the senses.

What??

mikey

The fact is I am NOT an anachronism, neither am I some crazy old dude who hangs around a liberal website annoying people.

I have predictions about the stock market that can earn you millions of dollars! My market-forecasting powers have made me rich!

The fact is untold wealth lies at your feet. All you have to do is ask for my predictions, moonbats!

Mark “Neidermeyer” Metcalf: Who are you? Where do you come from? Are you listening to me? What do you want to do with your life?

Gary Ruppert: The fact is I wanna troll.

off the subject but a recommendation for Ifthethunderdon’tgetya:

Winterland 11/10/1973 – 33rd Anniversary show with a big tasty sammich in the second set.

Figgered you might like that 😉

Gary is NOT AN ANACHRONISM! He his merely stale 😉

After seeing all over the media that the dude brought home a dead baby, one can hope he hasn’t got much left in the closet. Of course, what’s outside the closet is pretty ugly.

Rich, I tell you, rich! Beyond your wildest dreams, you abortion-loving, homosexual-marrying moonbats. And my secrets can be yours if you just send for my free video, “Wealth Secrets of Gary” at http://garyruppert.blogspot.com/

P.S. This is not wire fraud.

Lose the Greenwald template.

Ha! I was betting that you’d describe pretty bullets for me, mikey, and you did so with real eloquence. My evening is now complete. Thank Smedley, the god of small arms, that I live in a country where I can easily go out and buy me some 308180gr Jacketed Spitzer Boattails if I so desire, if only to rattle them around in my palm.

Rumbold: Yes. The worst thing about Greenwald’s site is his background, so why do others use it? Jon Swift and now Gary? Sheesh.

My favorite Gary moments are those when I just can’t tell whether it’s live or memorex. Keeps me happy for whole minutes at a time.

I believe Santorum has national appeal, despite his loss in Pennsylvania. And although Allen’s campaign was knocked off stride, nobody will care much.
[…]
Suffice it to say that Hillary Clinton … carr[ies] baggage

Santorum: lost

Allen: lost

Clinton: won, with 70% of the vote.

But it’s Clinton who has the “baggage”.

OK, Beavis.

In the early seventies, Mortician, I read Trevanian’s “The Eiger Sanction”. I think I got on some level it was an elaborate parody, but I truly wanted to be, and fancied myself to be Jonathan Hemlock. To this day I use much of that book in my daily dialog. Ask me about “nice” people, for example. But one particular line stands out. When Jon demands a particular high fee for the assasination, and his boss, Yurassis Dragon (I TOLD you it was a parody) agrees and hands over an envelope with the newly agreed amount in it, Trevanian offers “Jonathan loathed being predictable”.

I’m going to have to think about your knowing my response before I did. May not be anything to be done, but I still gotta consider it, y’know?

mikey

Allrighty then, where is Gary hiding from House Speaker Pelosi…under the bed or in the closet?

Madame Speaker Pelosi, armed with the Gavel of Vengence ™, stalks the barren, blasted landscapes of Gary’s Miller-driven fever nightmares, looking for true conservatives and christians, much like the opening sequence of Terminator 2…..

mikey

Mikey, listen to this Katherine Harris interview at the General. It’s kind of long, but the payoff is huge.

The clones!

Wanna say something else. Gonna do it here.

Y’know, I never gave a shit about the whole distraction about the “Dixie Chicks” and bush and iraq. Oh, I got that they were brave, and on the right side of history, and they stayed honest and true and I was happy to honor the commitment. But it wasn’t my kind of music. I never heard their music, and I never knew what they did.

Let me say here that I’m a little displeased with my lack of curiosity. VH1 Storytellers played an hour show condensed out of one of their concerts. It’s still on, actually. My goodness. These are beautiful, talented, elegant songwriters and performers. I’m somewhere between impressed and in awe. Not to overstate it, but they radiate honor and beauty. That they were attacked for a valid political position in a country that honors free speech is sick and sad, but when you listen to them talking about home and family, it just gets insane….

mikey

Dixie Chicks: Now Mikey, Co. Approved!

I just started listening to the HArris thing. This is fake, right? This has to be fake. I’m 1:11 in. This is some Conan O’Brian thing, right? With the pictures and the lips?
Jesus. I bet you could smell the alcohol over the phone. Wow.
This has to be fake. No way.

My favorite Gary moments are those when I just can’t tell whether it’s live or memorex. Keeps me happy for whole minutes at a time.

Allrighty then, where is Gary hiding from House Speaker Pelosi…under the bed or in the closet?

The market says the closet, and it’s never wrong.

Some Guy, it is Janeanne Garofolo. Although if you heard some of the stuff Kitty actually has said, you’d wouldn’t be as skeptical.

And remember, THIS is the woman who was in charge of Florida elections 2000.

you wouldn’t , or maybe Yoo would.

I feel l little bit better now.

Wonkette’s banner ads make my firefox cry.

Regarding her debate… I guess she’s trying to say that a vote wouldn’t get out of commitee? Do they have commmitties for stuff like that?

I still think it’s important to remember that if the Dems turn out to be stupid enough to run Hillary in ’08, then whomever the Repubs put on their ticket will win.

This isn’t a reflection of my personal feelings about Hillary Clinton; just a reflection that she is unelectable on the national scale. For whatever reason, sane or not, the heartland hates her with an irrational passion The Repubs know this, and will definitely offer something as odious as an Allen/Santorum ticket if she runs.

So don’t laugh too hard yet. The ’08 election might be the Dems to lose – but as we’ve seen all too often in the last decade, there are few perfect setups that the Democrats can’t manage to fuck up.

Hey mikey, I was in the same place as you with the Dixie Chicks for a long time (although I really admired their nude, body-painted argument for free speech on the cover of Entertainment Weekly) until a few months ago when a friend literally forced me to listen to “Not Ready to Make Nice.” I was sold.

And now, in addition to the six other books splayed open on various desks, nightstands and coffee tables around the house, I have to get my hands on a copy of The Eiger Sanction. That’ll teach me to mouth off about pretty bullets . . .

“The fact is that he is correct. Real Americans in the heartland will revolt against the liberal putsch that has just been foysted on us. We’re not going to take it. ”

“The fact is that this travesty of an election will be overturned once the irregularty is investigated and the bias exposed.”

The fact is, I can’t tell if this is the real Gary (or, in Republispeak, the “real” “Gary”) or one of the many clever parodists on this board. Was there ever a real Gary? Or are we all, in some way, Gary? Is it possible that there’s some idiot out there stocking up on beef jerky and Red Bull in hopes of a fascist takeover, or has Gary always been the male Betty Bowers?

Hilarious either way.

Just remember …

Bullets don’t kill people.

Donald Rumsfeld killed people.

Shorter Sniper:

Q. Are we not men?
A. We are Gary!

Unelectable, hell. I’d be amazed if Hillary made it through to November 08 without some nutjob taking a shot at her. She’s not my favorite person, but the shit the righties say about her is downright *vile*.

You could call that baggage, I think. I’m not trying to blame the victim, but I’d also kind of like to not see her become a victim.

We can be Garys
Just for one day

Allen/Santorum would be pretty good, but my personal Repub Dream Primary pits Santorum against Willard “Mitt” Romney. Oh, the sanctimony! Oh, the smarm! More shiny teeth than the Alien Vs. Predator movies, not to mention the ankle-deep slime & greenish entrails decorating the set! And, by the time the screaming stopped, two of the wackiest varieties of Talibangelical intolerance would have been exposed to the light of day in all their squirming, sickly, anti-human “glory”. Run, Willard, run! Run, Richard, run!

And Hilary Clinton does have baggage, some of it containing large sums of cash money. But she won’t run for president because D. Sidhe is right — there aren’t enough Secret Service agents in the country to keep her safe from every drooling basement dweller looking for second-hand immortality. Hillary Clinton is our generation’s Teddy Kennedy, but keeping her fanbase & donor pool on permanent exhibit is one way she stays in the Senate long enough to match Teddy’s record.

Oh, and Mikey — if you haven’t heard the Dixie Chick’s version of “Travelling Soldier”, go find a copy immediately. Dam’ song makes me cry every time I hear it, and I’m not an easy crier.

Wonkette’s banner ads make my firefox cry.

What banner ads?

Never noticed them.

Hey, mikey–if you now find the Dixie Chicks of interest, there’s a barand new documentary about them and the Bush-controversy called Shut Up and Sing. You’ve probably seen the banner ad on a more popular liberal blog near you, like Kos or Atrios. The critics lurve it; I can’t give you a personalized review as I haven’t seen it.

“brand.” I always see typos just as I hit the “submit” button. BRING BACK THE “PREVIEW” BUTTON!1!!

Oh mikey, not Trevanian. I beg of you, no Trevanian. I think it was parody, too, but there was quite a vogue for it for a while, when I was still working in bookselling. I forget which title of his finally made even the American reading public realize that he’d been having them on the whole time.

Marq: I say we strike until the bring back the Preview Button. I’ll bet we could get Billy Bragg to come play ‘There Is Power In A Union,’ and we could all sing along till the Sadly, No! lads beg for mercy.

It’s worth a try. As a differently-abled typist, I really need THAT GODDAMNED FUCKING PREVIEW BUTTON, OK????

Ahem. Sorry. *passes round plate of shortbread as peace offering*

Mmmm, this shortbread is delicious!