FriST!

Probably should read it now …

You can please yourself, but somebody’s gonna get it

Quisling lost me with Rikki Tikki Tavi.

I think we’d be more concerned with him corresponding with Pam Atlas

For some reason, the idea of such a correspondence made me think of this

WTF caused this site’s posts to become so fucking long-winded and unreadable? Did it get taken over by mad wingnuts determined to kill us all with boredom? Who TF wants to read 5000 word fisks of right-wing crap that nobody takes seriously in the first place?

The magazine cover clearly says, You asked, Selena answers…

Well, he wouldn’t be the first mass-murderer who got a fair trial in a court of law. I don’t see what they’re so wrapped up about.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nuremberg_Trials

To be fair, I’m a bit confused about why this trial is still going on as well. Breivik admits to killing these people, he’s been declared medically sane and his only “defence” is that he did it to save Norway from the darkies or some such bollocks, which clearly isn’t an admissible legal defence. Why is he allowed to take up weeks of court time reading out his version of Mein Kampf? It’s supposed to be a trial, not an old-school filibuster.

(Not that I agree with the rest of numbnuts’ ramblings, of course, but he has a point there)

Congress shall make no law that shall abridge the right to scroll.
.

To be fair, I’m a bit confused about why this trial is still going on as well.

That would be the Norwegians’ business.

Rule 34, motherfuckers.

Near as I can do the ciphering, we’ve got yer vores, necrophilia, and the boobs currently known as Pamela Geller. That’s Rule 34 BINGO. Shame to have to start drinking this early.

Cerberus, fucking awesome.

To be fair, I’m a bit confused about why this trial is still going on as well.

If their legal system is anything like ours – a confession is not the same thing as a guilty plea. A confession can be used as evidence to convict, but you still have to convict.

Also, admitting to an act is not the same thing as a legal confession. Breivik, like Zimmerman, admits to an act he believes is defensible. Either act may or may not be illegal – IMO, both are – but that’s what trials are for.

To be fair, I’m a bit confused about why this trial is still going on as well.

Yeah, why can’t they be more like the U.S.?

We just blow people up or kidnap and torture them, because warren terra.

USA! USA! USA!
~

Is the basic shorter here not something like

Any approval of Brevik’s opinions you might spot from right wing commentators will have been degenerate Euroliberalism’s fault for allowing him to make us aware of them

Ken,

I find your arguments compelling and look forward to subscribing to your pithy newsletter.

I have to agree with BringTheNoise. Maybe in LA, a casual judge would allow the accused to give long speeches about his motives and purpose. But in the USA, the trial begins with the prosecutions presentation. Then the accused can present his own defense, as directed by the judge. Google Colin Ferguson (the LIRR shooter) to see how this trial could play out in the USA. The accused would not be given a platform to talk for days if the American judge had any control over his courtroom.

Should the title for the last post be this one as well, but like “Part 2”?

Dhalgren,

isn’t it shocking how foreign those foreigners are?

I read an article on Baptist-facebook-friend’s facebook a while back whining about the fact that European justice systems weren’t being mean enough to Breivik and that a Christian country with Christian values would have executed the fucker just like he deserves and like it says in the Bible.

The fact that Breivik was operating 100% on their ideology, and specifically a part of it they’ve been pushing for the last ten years, is just conveniently not going to be talked about.

isn’t it shocking how foreign those foreigners are?

Some are cold as ice.

Oh, and I am beyond finished with conservatives playing pseudo-psychoanalyst/Professor X and claiming to know the instincts and motivations of people they (1) never met and (2) attack for not understanding anything.

Didn’t Debbie Strudelbrain write a defense of this guy right after the murders, on the grounds that those kids were Islamofascist sympathizers who had it coming? I wonder how that’s working out for her.

As for Breivik, I agree that it’s Norway’s business. Letting the fucker ramble for a few days before locking him up for the rest of his life doesn’t seem unreasonable to me.

But there’s no such thing as Supervillains.

Um, er…: http://www.comicsalliance.com/2012/05/02/real-life-super-villain-rex-velvet-terrorizes-seattle-with-aweso/

Didn’t Debbie Strudelbrain write a defense of this guy right after the murders

Right down the memory hole. These rotten fuckers throw up so much bullshit on a daily basis it is easy to pick, choose, and disappear memory as needed.

Ah, the ironies. By which I mean, Chris, there’s a response to your question at the end of the last thread.

There actually are a couple reasons why they are letting the trial go the full length instead of cutting it short.

First, they don’t want there to be any possibility of room to call it an unfair or rushed trial, thus trying to prevent a BS martyrdom of Anders Breivik.

Second, they already have a court document proving he’s legally sane and just a giant narcissist. Problem is, the first psychiatric evaluation concluded he was cookoo for cocoa puffs and schizophrenic, so part of the trial is demonstrating that he was sane in his execution of his plan, he’s just coming from a broken moral philosophy and is overly enamored with himself.

Allowing him to babble on like a supervillain about how he was personally responsible for spearheading contemporary conservative actions nicely demonstrates that there is in fact logical construction from illogical premises and well, the fact that he’s a giant narcissist. Never interrupt the other side when they are busy furiously demonstrating your own case.

And third, I imagine liberals in the country would love it to be in the court record how Breivik engaged in his actions thanks to the worldview constructions of what is rapidly becoming mainstream American conservatism. It’s one thing for it to be what “everyone knows” about the case and another for it to actually be in the court record, brought up by the defendant himself. Again, ropes, enough of, and for the hanging of oneself.

Ken L-

Curses, you’ve rumbled my nefarious plot to bring down the site!

On Scroll Fatigue-

Sadly, No! Industries is not unfeeling to the dangers and pains of scroll fatigue. As such, we wish to highlight emergency aids for such events. First of all, the End key on your keyboard can be used as an emergency jump to the end of the comment thread so that no scrolling time is lost jumping over boring paragraphs of post. Additionally, on the main page, clicking on the “comments” button at the bottom of the post will jump you to the beginning of the comment thread, allowing you to just scroll through the pages of comments instead.

Finally, Sadly, No! Industries realizes that verbosity kills over 1 million pre-Americans per second and can cause Space Lazer AIDS. As such, each post contains a shorter early on in the post. Reading the shorter and jumping into the comment sections is a time-honored tradition here and new eviler posters certainly don’t want to take that away from readers.

We hope this alleviates all concerns. Thank you and have a wonderful day here at Sadly, No! Industries.

Alleviating the concern.

That would be the Norwegians’ business.

Exactly. Wingnuts who don’t understand our own laws feel they have the moral authority to weigh in on the nuances of another country’s legal system?

Space laser AIDS is a horrific disease that is 100% preventable. Never have sex with a major defense contractor. If you must have sex with Boeing or Raytheon, use a condom.

Shorter O’Sullivan:

Just kill this dreamy crazy guilty guy already. He’s exposing the end game in open court.

Ah, the ironies. By which I mean, Chris, there’s a response to your question at the end of the last thread.

Thanks! Now that you mentioned it, I do remember the Orwell thing being in the context of the IRD.

And third, I imagine liberals in the country would love it to be in the court record how Breivik engaged in his actions thanks to the worldview constructions of what is rapidly becoming has rapidly become American conservatism.

FTFY. And keep writing those super-long rebuttals. I don’t always read all of it, but when I do it’s always worth it.

Why do we give a shit if he rambles on in court about all of his creepy fantasies? Maybe SOME people appreciate the idea of putting these things on record and using what was said to learn how to prevent these sort of things in the future.

Attention wingnuts: Shut the fuck up and die already.

Holy crap, I think I’m going to have to click through. Did anybody grab a screencap before this inevitably gets scrubbed after normal people express their rage and horror?

I think we’d be more concerned with him corresponding with Pam Atlas

Yeah, they don’t want a trial to go on because evidence will lead to certain beloved American wingnuts as instigators.

Yeah, because allowing the defense to make its case is what show trials are all about.

As a result, he becomes a little more interesting himself and so (as is plainly one of his aims) a little less blankly monstrous.

Silly wingnut, monsters are such interesting people.

OT, but I am convinced that Rick Santorum beats off to that clip.

Yeah, they don’t want a trial to go on because evidence will lead to certain beloved American wingnuts as instigators.

If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were accusing Gellar and her ilk of spreading hyperbolic falsehoods about muslims.

Say it ain’t so, B!

Once again, I’m confronted with most of these right-wing creeps, who wouldn’t pass up a chance to spit on a Soviet Russian (y’know, when the Soviet Russian is secured from punching them in the face afterward), are desperately in love with the old Soviet justice system, where criminals were in a cage during trial, and ended it staring at a shower drain before their brains rocketed against the wall.

And when one considers that to them, Norway is basically just another Soviet Russia, I an understand their confusion when Breivik is allowed to wear a suit and sit down at a table, and is just going to spend life in prison instead of executed.

This is trivial, I know, but I can’t help it:

1) This post has one of the all-time great Sadly photoshops.

2) Tiger Beat? Srsly? That thing still exists?

1) This post has one of the all-time great Sadly photoshops.

Agreed! Plus Miley is much hotter than Breivik.

and is just going to spend life in prison instead of executed.

Summarily executed without an actual trial. You know, like the stories about China–haul him outside, shoot him in the head, and make the family pay for the bullet.

Yeah, the wingnuts want this settled quick and quiet before Brievik spills the beans on how close he shares their philosophy. Great post, Cerb!

Cerb – That makes a lot of sense, although the lawyer part of my brain still doesn’t like the idea of letting people make long pointless speeches with no real legal relevance, but as other’s have pointed out – it’s Norway, not Scotland*.

* For that is where I am, and got my LLB.

I am just baffled by the original article. He is coming out in opposition to the rights to free speech and a fair trial in open court? And in some way, he believes that this position is the appropriate one for a patriotic American to take?

I think everybody should print out this article and mail it to their local school boards as Exhibit A of “Why we still need Grade 1 Civics class”.

Oh great FSM, are we anywhere near the bottom of the rabbit hole yet? This post made my brain hurt, and I only read half of it. The pretzel illogic just kept going and going, and going… How does Cerberus do it? I am in awe…

I also meant to say, though, that I do find it surprising that twenty-one years is the longest sentence this guy could get. Canadian “life sentences” usually are only twenty-five years long in practice but:

1) That’s when you become eligible for parole, not a guarantee that they’ll actually let you out, and
2) Mass murderers are often sentenced to serve one “life sentence” for each victim, in succession. So, even assuming Norwegians are eligible for parole after twenty-one years for murder, they could probably put him away until the year 3000 if they phrase things correctly.

I am skeptical of the claim, but IANANL obviously.

I also meant to say, though, that I do find it surprising that twenty-one years is the longest sentence this guy could get. Canadian “life sentences” usually are only twenty-five years long in practice but:

It does sound surprising, though I doubt it’s actually true. Regardless, I don’t think Norway gives much of a fat shit what we think, and I’m guessing that they believe in that goofy liberal “rule of law” shit there. tl;dr: Let the Norweigians worry about it and SHUT THE FUCK UP, O’Sullivan.

And drop the O’. It makes your butt look big.

WTF caused this site’s posts to become so fucking long-winded and unreadable? I>

I think you’re looking for “Tweetin’ ’bout wingnut bullshit”, mister.

It does sound surprising, though I doubt it’s actually true.

I imagine that there aren’t too many mass-murders in Norway, so this is an unprecedented case. Surely, he’ll be evaluated after serving the typical maximum sentence, then be found ineligible for release. It’s just a wingnut canard, much like: In the light of Norway’s comfortable prison conditions, such a penalty can hardly be called harsh.

Yeah, prison, even in Norway, is a friggin’ picnic… why can’t Norwegian prisons be a secular hell like our increasingly privatized U.S. prisons are?

Can’t have some furriner pull back the curtain and expose the Grand Wizard, now can we, upstanding Amurkkan white folk of power and prestige?

The problem with Norway is that it’s not white enough.

Yeah, prison, even in Norway, is a friggin’ picnic…

When I lived in Norway in the 80s, there was one prison in the whole country. I was told it was a concentration camp in WWII. I doubt it was a picnic.

The population of Norway is under five million, so one penitentiary makes sense.

I’m still miffed that we had to have those pesky Nuremberg trials when we all could have been watching “Missus Goes A Shopping,” one of the earliest game shows on television.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

There is no sentence of life imprisonment in Norwegian law. There is however an indeterminate penalty that could in principle result in life imprisonment, but there are no examples of such after the latest correctional law passed in 2002. There are basically two types of maximum penalty laws:

The maximum determinate penalty is 21 years imprisonment, but only a small percentage of prisoners serve more than 14 years. Prisoners will typically get unsupervised parole for weekends etc. after serving ? of their sentence (a maximum of 7 years) and can receive early release after serving ? of their sentence (a maximum of 14 years). In 2008, to fulfill its requirements under the Rome Statute, Norway created a new maximal penalty of 30 years for crimes against humanity.[1]

The indeterminate penalty, called “containment” (Norwegian: forvaring), is set at 21 years imprisonment, and the prisoner is required to serve at least 10 years before becoming eligible for parole. If the prisoner is still considered dangerous after serving the original sentence, the prisoner can receive up to five years additional containment. If the additional time is served, and the offender is still considered dangerous, a prisoner can continue to receive up to five years additional containment, and this, in theory, could result in actual life imprisonment. “Containment” is used when the prisoner is deemed a danger to society and there is a great chance of committing violent crimes in the future.[2] However, the offender can be paroled or released at any time if it is determined that the offender is no longer a danger to society.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

There is no sentence of life imprisonment in Norwegian law. There is however an indeterminate penalty that could in principle result in life imprisonment, but there are no examples of such after the latest correctional law passed in 2002. There are basically two types of maximum penalty laws:

The maximum determinate penalty is 21 years imprisonment, but only a small percentage of prisoners serve more than 14 years. Prisoners will typically get unsupervised parole for weekends etc. after serving ? of their sentence (a maximum of 7 years) and can receive early release after serving ? of their sentence (a maximum of 14 years). In 2008, to fulfill its requirements under the Rome Statute, Norway created a new maximal penalty of 30 years for crimes against humanity.[1]

The indeterminate penalty, called “containment” (Norwegian: forvaring), is set at 21 years imprisonment, and the prisoner is required to serve at least 10 years before becoming eligible for parole. If the prisoner is still considered dangerous after serving the original sentence, the prisoner can receive up to five years additional containment. If the additional time is served, and the offender is still considered dangerous, a prisoner can continue to receive up to five years additional containment, and this, in theory, could result in actual life imprisonment. “Containment” is used when the prisoner is deemed a danger to society and there is a great chance of committing violent crimes in the future.[2] However, the offender can be paroled or released at any time if it is determined that the offender is no longer a danger to society.

Why does that keep happening to me?

I just want to say that I feel your pain. After reading this very long post, I realize too that no words in the English language are sufficient to explain the craven viciousness that inhabits people like this. No matter what you say, it can’t capture the enormity of this kind of thinking. Too bad- it’s a dirty job but someone has to try to do it.

The next time a raving looney leftist is tried for mass murder, I look forward to O’Sullivan’s concern about how a long trial would just be so icky.

Is O’Sullivan gunning for the title of resident NR Brit twit now that Derbyshire has been packed off?

We may observe that the whingnut mind has completely disassociated the notion of rehabilitation from the purpose of imprisonment. It is purely and solely for punishment, the harsher the better. Fuck you you fucking Sadistic fascist fucks.

Also too, what the fuck is to you, O’Sully? Not your country fetish boy.

Why does that keep happening to me?

I’ve been wondering how you manage to do it, how you circumvented the “looks like you already said that” WP junkpunch.

When I lived in Norway in the 80s, there was one prison in the whole country. I was told it was a concentration camp in WWII. I doubt it was a picnic.

Helmut, I hope you realize that I was, as is typical, snarking.

We may observe that the whingnut mind has completely disassociated the notion of rehabilitation from the purpose of imprisonment. It is purely and solely for punishment, the harsher the better. Fuck you you fucking Sadistic fascist fucks.

It’s not purely and solely for punishment, it’s also for removing a disproportionate amount of young black men from the voter rolls and for funneling ghastly amounts of money into the pockets of the prison industrial complex.

I’ve been wondering how you manage to do it, how you circumvented the “looks like you already said that” WP junkpunch.

WordPress took one look at 90’s tsam’s hair and thought, “I’ll let this guy get away with taking any sort of liberties.”

Why does that keep happening to me?

If you’re looking for a solution, I’ve heard that sometimes it helps to think about nuns or baseball scores.

I’ve been wondering how you manage to do it, how you circumvented the “looks like you already said that” WP junkpunch.

Well, it involves hammering the “Submit Comment” button continuously while it implores me to “Slow Down”… Feature or bug? We report, you decide.

>WordPress took one look at 90?s tsam’s hair and thought, “I’ll let this guy get away with taking any sort of liberties.”

You sure know how to make a boy feel good!

If you’re looking for a solution, I’ve heard that sometimes it helps to think about nuns or baseball scores.

Nuns: OPPOSITE EFFECT. Have you seen Virgin Territory? If you haven’t, I highly suggest Netflixing it. Keep a box of Kleenex handy.

I think I’ll roll with the bonerpills. If you they can get Rush to church on time, they should work on me too, I’m thinking.

I’ve been wondering how you manage to do it, how you circumvented the “looks like you already said that” WP junkpunch.

Well, it involves hammering the “Submit Comment” button continuously while it implores me to “Slow Down”… Feature or bug? We report, you decide.

>WordPress took one look at 90?s tsam’s hair and thought, “I’ll let this guy get away with taking any sort of liberties.”

You sure know how to make a boy feel good!

If you’re looking for a solution, I’ve heard that sometimes it helps to think about nuns or baseball scores.

Nuns: OPPOSITE EFFECT. Have you seen Virgin Territory? If you haven’t, I highly suggest Netflixing it. Keep a box of Kleenex handy.

I think I’ll roll with the bonerpills. If you they can get Rush to church on time, they should work on me too, I’m thinking.

I’ve been wondering how you manage to do it, how you circumvented the “looks like you already said that” WP junkpunch.

Well, it involves hammering the “Submit Comment” button continuously while it implores me to “Slow Down”… Feature or bug? We report, you decide.

>WordPress took one look at 90?s tsam’s hair and thought, “I’ll let this guy get away with taking any sort of liberties.”

You sure know how to make a boy feel good!

If you’re looking for a solution, I’ve heard that sometimes it helps to think about nuns or baseball scores.

Nuns: OPPOSITE EFFECT. Have you seen Virgin Territory? If you haven’t, I highly suggest Netflixing it. Keep a box of Kleenex handy.

I think I’ll roll with the bonerpills. If you they can get Rush to church on time, they should work on me too, I’m thinking.

WordPress is my bitch.

WordPress (FYWP just because) obviously has a real thing for tsam. What’s it like being stalked, tsam?

JT Ready

18 hours ago via mobile.

Reports are unconfirmed that a cartel assassination squad murdered JT Ready and several of his friends and family this afternoon in Gilbert Arizona. This page’s admin will keep you updated of the situation as soon as possible.

Via Facebook…

For those that don’t know already, JT Ready is a former Marine and self-proclaimed militia border guard, and among the worst of the right wing racist, xenophobic, lying, gun-fetishists. He and 4 other people were found dead in Arizona, and it’s (as yet unconfirmed) believed that he committed a murder-suicide.

The other weirdos automatically assumed drug cartel.

WordPress (FYWP just because) obviously has a real thing for tsam. What’s it like being stalked, tsam?

Despite my outward disdain for it, it does stroke my narcissism nicely, I must say.

Nuns: OPPOSITE EFFECT. Have you seen Virgin Territory? If you haven’t, I highly suggest Netflixing it. Keep a box of Kleenex handy.

Yeah, right… you’ve been watching The Flying Nun reruns. Admit it, Sally Field made a grade-A manic pixie dream nun.

isn’t it shocking how foreign those foreigners are?

Some are cold as ice.

some are also hot blooded…check it and see…

I love her. I REALLY LOVE HER! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

tsam can hit for the cycle with a homerun in his next at-bat.

The other weirdos automatically assumed drug cartel.

Might it be his own delayed post?

We may observe that the whingnut mind has completely disassociated the notion of rehabilitation from the purpose of imprisonment. It is purely and solely for punishment, the harsher the better.

Along those lines, I recommend looking at Central America and its fight against American-born gangs like MS-13. Most of the police forces down there are advised by the FBI; they’ve passed harsh laws known as “mano dura,” which consist mostly of cracking skulls and taking names, and no matter how hard they crack the skulls, the problems just keep getting worse.

The only country that’s had any success dealing with MS-13? Nicaragua. Because the left wing government down there is also the only government that invested seriously in rehabilitation programs in prison, rather than just punishment. But you know, let’s not let inconvenient facts get in the way of the greater truth.

Helmut, I hope you realize that I was, as is typical, snarking

I realize this, I just wanted to share what I heard about the prison in Norway. Speaking personally I would try extra hard to not go to a prison on the site of a concentration camp, regardless if had been remodeled to ‘country club’ status. I would even find extra laws to abide by.

for funneling ghastly amounts of money into the pockets of the prison industrial complex

and screwing over the local unskilled economy at the same time. Who would hire free citizens who have to be paid minimum wage, when you can hire prisoners for a fifth of the cost and get armed guards to keep them in line too?

tsam can hit for the cycle with a homerun in his next at-bat.

Good–I’m really bored with all the no-hitters I keep throwing out there. I gotta get some better jokes.

Dear Mr. No,

The posts on your site are too long. Please shorten them by 18%.

Yours truly,
I.P. Freely

and screwing over the local unskilled economy at the same time. Who would hire free citizens who have to be paid minimum wage, when you can hire prisoners for a fifth of the cost and get armed guards to keep them in line too?

And by relocating urban residents to rural regions, thereby skewing the population for purposes of congressional representation…

Damn, Norway’s looking better with every comment.

Damn, Norway’s looking better with every comment.

Well, except for all the snow and ice and lutefisk…

for those of you still playing along, here’s the latest in the ‘hubbkf takes on the insurance industry and loses and how’s he doing, btw?’ saga…

he has the option of seeing a couple of health partner docs, one of which he would have to wait until july 19 for the earliest appointment…he picked this one (i suspect because she is hotter than the other one) because he thought he would be able to understand her better since she’s romanian and the other doc (female also) is asian…well, he didn’t want to wait THAT long, so he decided to go with dr. dong (yes, we giggle every time we say it)…he can get in to see her may 18th…

in the meantime, while waiting to hear about this appointment, the mayo clinic called HIM to see if he wanted to make an appointment there for after july 1 when his new insurance plan kicks in…hubbkf was all ‘wtf? how do you know this?’ apparently one of the neurologists in sioux falls called mayo and let them know the latest…that’s kind of cool.

so, we’re going to see dr. dong (heh) on the 18th…if she can’t do anything or if we aren’t happy with the diagnosis or wev, we’ll have an appointment at mayo…

this all makes hubbkf feel better which makes me feel better even though i am slightly pissed at him…he told me yesterday that along with all his other symptoms, when he has to turn around, he feels off balance…when i asked him why in the hell he hadn’t told the neuros abou this, he was like, ‘well, they gave me a balance test and it was fine…’ i had to refrain from slapping HIS forehead as i explained that duh…it’s something going on in yer brane…which is what they are worried about…

i swear to bob, hubbkf would make the best spy in the fricking world…getting ANY and all info out of him is nigh unpossible…i refer to him as ‘sam’ for secret agent man…

Well, except for all the snow and ice and lutefisk…

i was going to remark on the lutefisk as well, but i have a feeling that for b^4 that would be a feature, not a bug…

i swear to bob, hubbkf would make the best spy in the fricking world…getting ANY and all info out of him is nigh unpossible…i refer to him as ‘sam’ for secret agent man…

This is not uncommon for dudez.

Very cool of that neurologist to put some extra work into getting him into the Mayo.

Doesn’t Canada still have that “dangerous offender status” thing, where if you’ve been put away for enough violent crime they can declare you to be Very Very Bad and, basically, never let you out? I thought that was the legal status of Clifford Olson and other Canadian mass murderers.

so, we’re going to see dr. dong (heh) on the 18th…if she can’t do anything or

I am disappoint. dr. dong would be fine name for a woman only if she was a urologist.

Slow down, you post too fast,
you got to make the snarkfest last
just posting on this piece of shit
looking for snark and feeling LIKE I’M BEING DISCRIMINATED AGAINST HOWCUM tsam GETS TO DO WHATEVER THE FUCK HE WANTS YOU FASCIST FUCKING SOFTWARE

That was in reply to Lurking Canadian, like, five hours ago, BTW. Time flies when you’re keeping the entire Internet aloft by the sheer mental force of your own stress!

LOL

•Refrigerators have arrived in the Old World, as has the electricity needed to power them. They now have more pleasant ways to keep food fresh.

•Today, more lutefisk is consumed in Wisconsin than in Norway.

•Norwegians buy more frozen pizzas per capita than any other nationality. They consume 13,000 tons of frozen pizza annually — an average of more than five and a half pounds of cheesy goodness for every man, woman, and screaming toddler.

Funneh stuff

Doesn’t Canada still have that “dangerous offender status” thing, where if you’ve been put away for enough violent crime they can declare you to be Very Very Bad and, basically, never let you out?

Yes.

Successful troll is VERY successful:

josh josh
04/23/12 15:50
1 vote

NRO doesn’t want Anders Breivik to face trial because we all need to get over this nasty business as soon as possible. The fact that he was a big fan of several NRO contributors and may mention that in court has no bearing on that opinion.

That one vote = MEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

WordPress is my bitch.

AMATEUR.

LIKE I’M BEING DISCRIMINATED AGAINST HOWCUM tsam GETS TO DO WHATEVER THE FUCK HE WANTS YOU FASCIST FUCKING SOFTWARE

Clearly you haven’t seen my beautiful hair from the 90s. It was epic. What’s with the lowercase JUST ON MY FUCKING NAME ANYWAY?

•Today, more lutefisk is consumed in Wisconsin than in Norway.

•Norwegians buy more frozen pizzas per capita than any other nationality. They consume 13,000 tons of frozen pizza annually — an average of more than five and a half pounds of cheesy goodness for every man, woman, and screaming toddler.

lutefisk pizza exists…i shit you not…

those of us who struggle on a daily basis to get our hair to take on a semblance of semi-normal would appreciate your gorgeous 90s hair not being rubbed in our faces…
.
.
.
.
oh…wait, we would like that very much…

lutefisk pizza exists…i shit you not…

lutefisk HOTPOCKETS!!!

I am disappoint. dr. dong would be fine name for a woman only if she was a urologist

heh…we have a urologist named dr. harder…and a procto guy named ‘crank’….

Lutefish tacos.

Down here we have a dentist named Dr. Smiley and there used to be a urologist in town named Dr. Biggerstaff. Sometimes you wonder if the the names drove them to the occupations…

i was going to remark on the lutefisk as well, but i have a feeling that for b^4 that would be a feature, not a bug…

Can’t get it ’round these parts. I did find tripe on sale real cheap last night, so I boiled the bayjayzuz out of it and simmered it in a simple tomato sauce so I could make tripe sandwiches.

heh…we have a urologist named dr. harder…and a procto guy named ‘crank’….

Too bad the proctologist isn’t Dr Butts.

i was going to remark on the lutefisk as well, but i have a feeling that for b^4 that would be a feature, not a bug…

Can’t get it ’round these parts. I did find tripe on sale real cheap last night, so I boiled the bayjayzuz out of it and simmered it in a simple tomato sauce so I could make tripe sandwiches.

heh…we have a urologist named dr. harder…and a procto guy named ‘crank’….

Too bad the proctologist isn’t Dr Butts. There was a guy who advertised on the subway, claiming to treat anal warts and other colorectal calamities, but googling “Dr Butts” seems to result only in porn sites.

Damn, damn, damn, getting just like tsam!

When I was growing up the police chief in a nearby town was named Suck (that’s pronounced SOOK!)

I’ve tried lutefisk a couple of times but luckily my Swedish-American dad was not a fan of it. Which is surprising since he could eat stuff that would choke a goat.

There’s a town on Vancouver Island called Sooke. Various sports teams there get called The Hawks. So, Sooke Hawks. Say it out loud.

Is lutefisk anything like pickled herring?

Pickled fish is MUCH better. Dad used to pickle trout every winter.

Is lutefisk anything like pickled herring?

How ’bout Scandinavian ceviche?

Pickled herring is awesome. When I was in Amsterdam, I made it a habit of visiting the herring kiosks for a quick lunch every day.

lutefisk pizza exists…i shit you not…

In Ireland I saw an ad for baked-bean pizza. After that I’ll believe anything.

Did someone say lutefisk pizza? http://www.svenandoles.com/menupagethree.html#originalpizza

Pickled herring is awesome

i call that norwegian breathmints…

and lutefisk is much slimier than herring…also pretty bland…most people have to smother it in melted butter to get it down…as far as scandahoovian ethnic foods go, i rate for klub…

Is lutefisk anything like pickled herring?

Pickled herring is delicious. Lutefisk is inedible. So, no.

WordPress is my bitch.

AMATEUR.

Whoa. You win.

That article says you can taste the lye in lutefisk. NO THANK YOU.

Ya know, I have ok hair, and WP always fucks with me. What makes tsam so special?

Also, eating disgusting and nasty shit because your ancestors did is just fucking dumb. They did it largely for survival reasons. Anymore it’s just being a chump.

OK, I looked up how they actually make lutefisk and it doesn’t sound very appetizing – and I’m a bit more adventurous than the average person.

That article says you can taste the lye in lutefisk. NO THANK YOU.

You hear that, cilantro snobs?

What makes tsam so special?

I think you know the answer to that question.

Alpha dog is alpha.

OK, I looked up how they actually make lutefisk and it doesn’t sound very appetizing – and I’m a bit more adventurous than the average person.

every easter season there are myriad lutefisk and swedish meatball suppers around here…they actually run out of lutefisk…

and yeah, when you have to soak something in lye to try to make it edible…well, yuck…

I think you know the answer to that question.

Alpha dog is alpha.

omg, don’t start with the Greek alphabet. it’s a dogwhistle for mra’s.

In Ireland I saw an ad for baked-bean pizza. After that I’ll believe anything.

i had the best nachos of my life at a pub in kilkenny called lanigans…

Alpha dog is alpha.

so YOU spread the dog food on major kong? kinkay…

Alpha dog is alpha.

I thought he was a Krofft saturday morning thing, like Electra-Girl or Sasquatch-Isreal-Boy.

Scotland, chip shop, corn and chicken pizza, deep-fried. So goooood, but how do these folks live past, you know, 3 years old?

His rambling paranoid web attacks on Norway’s social democrats for betraying Christian civilization were given wide publicity on the day after his rampage.

His rambling paranoid web attacks on Norway’s social democrats for “betraying Christian civilization” were given wide publicity on the day after his rampage.

When news organizations stopped putting “ethnic cleansing” in quotations I was appalled. They persisted so that the term “ethnic cleansing” is now routinely used without quotation marks as if it were a legitimate concept.

Is there “peak wingnut”? This term assumes that they top off and then decline; but that’s not how they work. The question is when do they hit bottom? And how? It’s a given that the more power they get, the lower they’ll go. Right now, they’re beating off to a mass murderer prattling on in court about why he felt justified to murder teen-agers in mass, which is a far cry from having State sanction to be a part of gangs that engage in mass murders to their heart’s delight and getting medals for it.

bbkf ma’am, best luck to hubbkf and his dong doctor.

how do these folks live past, you know, 3 years old?

Not to mention the smoking, drinking and lack of exercise.

omg, don’t start with the Greek alphabet. it’s a dogwhistle for mra’s.

Maybe I’m an MRA troll….You just DON’T know, do ya?

so YOU spread the dog food on major kong? kinkay…

A brother’s got to eat.

so YOU spread the dog food on major kong? kinkay…

It’s a sick world and I’m a happy man.

Why are MRAs so drawn to the greek alphab—OHHHHH. Greek. I see.

There’s a good interview 20 minutes into part one with a guy who makes surstrommming – fermented herring in a can. He’s trying to rescue it from a potential ban. It begins with audio of guys trying it.

21 minutes into part one here there’s some listener reaction:

“If you have ever smelled dirty baby diapers, you will know how it smells. It is a real challenge to get it past your nose, but does have a rather sweet taste that is not objectionable. Having a few beers to wash them down will guarantee at least three days of surstromming hangover aroma.”

Trials with that brisk format used to take place in Britain following guilty pleas.

Well no shit, in most places a defendant waives a trial by pleading guilty… the problem is Breivik didn’t plead guilty. You can’t preemptively waive a trial because YOU JUST KNOW the guy pleading innocent is guilty.

The accused would not be given a platform to talk for days if the American judge had any control over his courtroom.

Descriptions of the trial from a NRO contributor are not necessarily connected to reality.

Didn’t Debbie Strudelbrain write a defense of this guy right after the murders, on the grounds that those kids were Islamofascist sympathizers who had it coming?

I believe it was Pam Gellar who opined that Breivik’s victims were all little Hitlers whom he was right to kill before they grew up. Her view did not go un-noticed in Norway. They also noticed that she remained in good standing with the US media, rather than being washed to ostracised pariah status in a universal wave of disgust. I suspect that Norwegians no longer care much about advice from America.

Mass murderers are often sentenced to serve one “life sentence” for each victim, in succession. So, even assuming Norwegians are eligible for parole after twenty-one years for murder, they could probably put him away until the year 3000 if they phrase things correctly.

The Norwegian system uses concurrent rather than consecutive sentences. OTOH, as Tsam pointed out, there is the option of indefinite preventative detention after 21 years.

If people think the Norwegian penal laws are unwieldy or too soft, contributing to the crime rate there — or that they should have alternative court procedures for sufficiently unpopular defendants — they have the option of voting for change. What’s that? You don’t have Norwegian citizenship? Well.

tsam and major: newsletter?

I’m a bit more adventurous than the average person.

Hence the dog food.

Didn’t Debbie Strudelbrain write a defense of this guy right after the murders, on the grounds that those kids were Islamofascist sympathizers who had it coming?

I believe it was Pam Gellar who opined that Breivik’s victims were all little Hitlers whom he was right to kill before they grew up

if i recall correctly, there was an unholy coinkydink where they both posted their odious reactions to the liberals’ reactions to the cold blooded gunning down of children (i remember strudelbrain shrieking that a lot of them were SEVENTEEN or OLDER and that’s NOT CHILDREN YOU LIEBRALS!!!) by a christian psychopath within hours of each other…i fear the internetz have not been the same ever since…

Exhibit A in the case against the first amendment. Seriously, this is how much lovers of a manly killer’s Nordic good looks hate that they live in a country where what they write could be aired. Twisted, n’est pas?

We own an old Encyclopedia of Sexual Health by Dr A. Willey.

I seem to remember everyone sort of dancing around an actual defense of Brievik, but inserting quite a few little things about the impending danger of Islam and some rhetorical questions along the lines of “what’s a guy supposed to do when he’s surrounded by camel jockeys who hate freedom and these liberals that coddle them?”.

In other words, the typical blame the victim mentality, perfected from the “what were you wearing” defense used against rape victims.

tsam and major: newsletter?

It’s classified due to major’s extensive military background. There are missions about which he cannot speak to this day.

In other words, the typical blame the victim mentality, perfected from the “what were you wearing” defense used against rape victims.

Actually, I believe the current defense is “My buddy asked me to screw her until she’s straight.”

Slight blogwhore.

Epic Takedown.

I suspect that Norwegians no longer care much about advice from America.

Well, lots of friendly advice from O’Sulley and other supergenius fuckwits about what Norway should do with a guy who murdered almost 100 Norwegians should turn that right around.

Down here we have a dentist named Dr. Smiley and there used to be a urologist in town named Dr. Biggerstaff. Sometimes you wonder if the the names drove them to the occupations…

And here we have a charming chap* who goes by the name of Dr. Slaughter.

*he is actually quite charming.

tsam, don’t know how you do it but I would like to see the cycle, though Jim seems to have been made king of WP.

bbkf, best wishes for a quick diagnosis and resolution to yer hubbkf’s situation.
.

Swedish meatballs I can dig. Limpa bread is awesome too.

On another subject, TBogg is a national treasure because of paragraphs like this:

Providing that arena security at the 2012 Republican National Convention in Tampa does their job and keeps past-her-freshness-date grandma Sarah Palin from bum rushing the stage during prime time and rhythmically humping the podium to the primal beat of Warrant’s Cherry Pie before she can be subdued with a grizzly tranquilizer dart, Mitt “Mitt” Romney should be the Republican nominee in November.

tsam, don’t know how you do it but I would like to see the cycle, though Jim seems to have been made king of WP.

Instructions shown upthread. If you have any patience at all, this stunt is not for you.

My theory: I think there is a lag time between the comment being committed to display on the site and then being added to a “cannot duplicate” list. If you manage to resubmit (hammering the submit button while it’s screaming at you to slow down), you can insert a duplicate before department of redundancy department gets wise to your crime.

And here we have a charming chap* who goes by the name of Dr. Slaughter.

I remember his storied military career well.

On another subject, TBogg is a national treasure because of paragraphs like this:

One of my daily visits. Unfortunately for me, yet possibly fortunate for the commentariat there, as I refuse to set up an account at Hamshers House of Shame™ I do not comment there.
.

What makes tsam so special?

I thought it was that whole throat-slashy, “I’LL FUCKING CUTCHU, MAN” thang.

Jim seems to have been made king of WP.

First Prize: a year’s supply of lutefisk pizza!

But never fear, tsam – you get Second Prize: a LIFETIME supply of lutefisk pizza!

If you manage to resubmit (hammering the submit button while it’s screaming at you to slow down), you can insert a duplicate before department of redundancy department gets wise to your crime.

Not only did I find this very humerous, it made me laugh.

Thanks buddy!

But never fear, tsam – you get Second Prize: a LIFETIME supply of lutefisk pizza!

Aww, you’d regift for me? I’m touched!

i had the best nachos of my life at a pub in kilkenny called lanigans…

And I had the best Indian food of my life at a place in Dublin.

Not all that surprising, I guess. Indian food is to the British Isles what Chinese food is to the USA: Cheap, tasty and kinda-sorta exotic.

I thought it was that whole throat-slashy, “I’LL FUCKING CUTCHU, MAN” thang.

I’m pretty sure it’s his penis.

Also, eating disgusting and nasty shit because your ancestors did is just fucking dumb. They did it largely for survival reasons. Anymore it’s just being a chump.

I believe it was Chris Rock who said he doesn’t like soul food because it’s just some nasty shit they fed to the slaves.

tsam and major: newsletter?

It’s classified due to major’s extensive military background. There are missions about which he cannot speak to this day.

Back in 1993 the major had to fly into Bosnia to transport tsam’s hair. The State Department thought that, being so goddamn awesome, tsam’s hair would be able to broker a ceasefire between the former Yugoslav splinter groups.

I’m pretty sure it’s his penis.

Completely unveiled.

speaking of penii and pizza’s I need to see if that really old yeast in the fridge is a going concern, and if so find a nice pizza dough recipe and think about some ‘za.
.

t4toby said,

And just WHERE THE FUCK have you been hiding?

One of my favorite lunch spots: http://www.vikingsoulfood.com/

Clearly you haven’t seen my beautiful hair from the 90s. It was epic.

This will not stand! I’m gonna track down a picture, and then OBS’s 90s hair and tsam’s 90s hair are gonna fuckin’ THROW DOWN!1!!1!!!!!eleven!one!

I just put the old yeast in some boiling water to see if that might kick things up a notch.
.

I need to see if that really old yeast in the fridge is a going concern

Prolly good, hard to kill that shit. You know how to proof it, yes?

The State Department thought that, being so goddamn awesome, tsam’s hair would be able to broker a ceasefire between the former Yugoslav splinter groups.

Sadly the hair went rogue and set up its own breakaway state. Combovia never was a going concern, however, an economy based on postage stamps and Tiger Beat magazine reprints was shaky at best.

I rate 4 Hair Wars.

Alas, putting yeast in boiling water is a pretty good way to kill it.

I just put the old yeast in some boiling water to see if that might kick things up a notch.

I hope you’re kidding.

Dammit Pup!

Last comment was a bit of food trolling, the heated water has a thermometer in it to let me know when it is safe to put in the yeasties, though I am not sure they will work at all, but it has been a little while since I made any proper dough.
🙂
.

Ya gotta put the yeast into bathtub-warm water, about 106-110 F.

Combovia never was a going concern, however, an economy based on postage stamps and Tiger Beat magazine reprints was shaky at best.

The residents of Combovia did manage to install their leader Donald Trump into a marginal position in the US media before the state dissolved among the inevitable (and brutal) left-vs-right-vs-backtofront-part wars of aught-two.

Sorry pup and OBS!

Sometimes I can’t help myself. Knowing that there are helpful and kindly gourmands around.

I used to bake bread for a living on two occasions and worked in a brewery. And while it has given a bit of amusement to my early evening, I am not proud of myself.

Now to check the temp of that water.
.

There are certain things one just does not joke about! Harumph.

I just put the old yeast in some boiling water to see if that might kick things up a notch.
Call it an austerity measure. It’s time those yeast cells learned to harden up if they’re to survive in a global economy of thermophilic archaebacteria.

Combovia never was a going concern, however, an economy based on postage stamps and Tiger Beat magazine reprints was shaky at best.

The residents of Combovia did manage to install their leader Donald Trump into a marginal position in the US media before the state dissolved among the inevitable (and brutal) left-vs-right-vs-backtofront-part wars of aught-two.

omfg…i am going to pee myself…KNOCK IT OFF!

the state dissolved among the inevitable (and brutal) left-vs-right-vs-backtofront-part wars of aught-two.

Wasn’t that a Star Trek episode with Frank Gorshin?

pssst, tsam, when you get a chance, head over to my gallery and check out my latest. Call me crazy but I think it may be right up your alley. Or at least your daughters’!

It’s the first (pink and purple) one.

There are certain things one just does not joke about! Harumph.

I know, and I kind of feel regretfull about it, but look at it this way, you all passed the intertron good person test™

Anyhoo if this batch goes off, there is another packet in the fridge which might lead to a couple loaves of Challah.
.

And I would like to add my $0.02 that:

A) I like the longers Cerb — sometimes it takes me a while to get time to read the whole thing, but it’s always worth it. You provide a shorter for those with ADD, perhaps you just need to be sure to very clearly label it as a shorter, ’cause you know certain people just need a little help identifying their ass from a hole in the ground.

2) Excellent photoshop, although I am very concerned that the article does not address what is going to happen to Miley now that she’s grounded! Oh no!

iii) The whole A), B), C), thing is ridiculous. Only total fucking losers make three-item lists…

It’s time those yeast cells learned to harden up if they’re to survive in a global economy of thermophilic archaebacteria.

Nice one! 🙂

Combovia never was a going concern…

Also Brill!
.

*hack hack hack* Sorry, smokers cough. get offa my lawn , Yeasts

This will not stand! I’m gonna track down a picture, and then OBS’s 90s hair and tsam’s 90s hair are gonna fuckin’ THROW DOWN!1!!1!!!!!eleven!one!

Bring it DAWG! Mine was based on Eddie Vedder’s hair and I believe I pulled it off (heh) nicely. Also, my shirtless pics sitting on the beach in Hawaii were rather sexy–looking back on them now.

Sadly the hair went rogue and set up its own breakaway state. Combovia never was a going concern, however, an economy based on postage stamps and Tiger Beat magazine reprints was shaky at best.

Best comment of the whole damn thread!!!

Combovia. I LOVE it!

i am going to pee myself

Ma’am, are you insinuating that the Combovia Part Wars were some sort of joke? I want you to know that my grandfather was a general in the Combovian infantry — marching boldly into battle with nothing more than a badly-worn Paul Mitchell hair brush and a strong sense of right and wrong (and right and left and backtofront). He came out brutally scarred, with nothing but an eighth inch of stubble, horrific stories for his grandchildren, and a hatred of Donald Trump. On his deathbed he reverently handed me that brush, and told me he had no regrets. I treasure that brush to this day, although, alas, like him, my glorious hair and the hopes of Combovians everywhere are reduced to stubble.

Some things are just not joked about. Like war. And yeast.

It’s the first (pink and purple) one.

Good gawd that’s amazing. I was also particularly taken with “Took Wild”–I think you know why, but it’s not just the sexual aspect.

You really are a fucking goddess.

Also, my shirtless pics sitting on the beach in Hawaii were rather sexy–looking back on them now.

I seriously doubt that I have any sort of proper defense against the brutal shirtless-Hawaii-beach-pic offense.

The residents of Combovia did manage to install their leader Donald Trump into a marginal position in the US media before the state dissolved among the inevitable (and brutal) left-vs-right-vs-backtofront-part wars of aught-two.

Trump is SUCH an asshole. He has an entire staff of Aqua Net wielding stylists to build and manage such a pristine mane of FAIL. My hatred is pure jealousy, I assure you.

I seriously doubt that I have any sort of proper defense against the brutal shirtless-Hawaii-beach-pic offense.

Let’s fire up the photoshop! I’ll put some muscles on me, and you can shop out your shirt! Let’s leave the pants on, though. Unless the ladies are asking for it….

VS;

I love “After” too. The Fairy Tale motif is WORKING!

You really are a fucking goddess.

I keep telling people this…still, no altars. People are assholes.

No, but, seriously, aside from my “fans,” I don’t think anyone out there offers up such effusive and unsolicited huzzahs. Yer da best.

Also too I apologize for making this thread all maudlin and shit. tsam and I are buds. I’M NOT AFRAID TO SAY IT~!

Wasn’t “Bloody Stump of Quisling” Spinal Tap’s Norwegian death-metal album?

Wasn’t “Bloody Stump of Quisling” Spinal Tap’s Norwegian death-metal album?

Also – every time I see a picture of Donald Trump at a public event, I imagine some brave soul(s) who have at his head with a SuperSoaker or a bucket of water. Does that make me a bad person?

On the yeast front of the Combovia wars, there does seem to be a little bit of activity, but not as much as I would expect at this time, so i think I’ll toss a little food to see if the troupers that remain will multiply into a proper froth.

.

I keep telling people this…still, no altars. People are assholes.

Cut us some slack, now, do you know how expensive it is to burn a hecatomb in this economy?

Also, it’s a little cold to be going out skyclad this time of year.

Does that make me a bad person?

nah, just the very model of a modern Major General. In my army at least.
.

On the yeast front of the Combovia wars, there does seem to be a little bit of activity, but not as much as I would expect at this time, so i think I’ll toss a little food to see if the troupers that remain will multiply into a proper froth.

If you’re lucky, you’ll be able to have a nice little “sponge” for future endeavors.

i think I’ll toss a little food to see if the troupers that remain will multiply into a proper froth.

Be sure to give them an long-winded pre-battle speech too, that always helps with morale.

every time I see a picture of Donald Trump at a public event, I imagine some brave soul(s) who have at his head with a SuperSoaker or a bucket of water.

Did you not see the Scottish protestor with the static-electricity-balloon trick?

I imagine some brave soul(s) who have at his head with a SuperSoaker or a bucket of water. Does that make me a bad person?

The Trump’s helmet is impervious to water, acid, and stylists with any self-respect whatsoever!

If you’re lucky, you’ll be able to have a nice little “sponge” for future endeavors.

I would love to get a starter started. We shall see, in any event dreams of Pizza for din din are going to have to be forestalled, so a nother plan of action will have to be dreamed up.

I hate it when I have to turn dinner on a dime, ‘specially if I had a real tasty idea in my head.

/puts on thinking cap
.

Also too I apologize for making this thread all maudlin and shit. tsam and I are buds. I’M NOT AFRAID TO SAY IT~!

You apologize to no one.

You damn right we is.

if I had a real tasty idea in my head.
Talk like that is just Zombie bait.

Be sure to give them an long-winded pre-battle speech too, that always helps with morale.

😆
Ahh yes, I’ll have to dig out my copy of the St. Crispins day speech. I think that should inspire the little buggers.

There have been a couple of moments on this thread whereif I had not followed my personal rule number one: Always swallow whatever it is in your mouth before reading anything. I once shot whiskey through my nose…that was not pleasant…at all.

.

OBS, per your suggestion i just gave the speech to the bowl of yeast, and I seem to have some activity afoot and a nice yeasty smell coming off of it.

Yes, I just read the entire Crispins speach to a bowl of water with some yeast and sugar in it, because that, folks, is how I roll.
.

That article says you can taste the lye in lutefisk

My hovercraft is full of eels.

Talk like that is just Zombie bait.

Oh god, i love this place!

i’ll be checking over my shoulder fro the rest of the evening however.

/sometimes I correct my typos, some times I leav ’em in there.
.

And hold their yeasthoods cheap when any speaks
That fermented with us on St. Crispin’s day.

It pays to be kind to yeast.

JOYSTICK.

And hold their yeasthoods cheap when any speaks
That fermented with us on St. Crispin’s day.

Crap Now I wonder if i am gonna have to re-read the speach properly this time.
.

i’ll be checking over my shoulder fro the rest of the evening however.

Enough with the hair wars already!

And though it’s part of the Lone Star State
People don’t seem to care,
They just keep on lookin’ to the yeast.

We’re talkin’ ’bout the Muffin Grove, wo, oh, oh,
Oh, Muffin Grove.

JOYSTICK.

Really???!!???

Really???

Wow!
.

The Yeast is Read.

Repeat after me: try TO. try TO. try TO make, for instance. Think infinitive, Cerberus.

Romeo is the Yeast and Juliet is the sun.

Yeast bound and down
Loaded up and fuckin’
We gunna do what
they say can’t be done.

What I don’t understand about medicinal leeches is how they learned all that medicine.

My father has a picture of my grandfather and a great-aunt standing cheek to cheek with grandpa’s combover extending over both noggins and completely obscuring the aunt’s ‘do.

What I don’t understand about medicinal leeches is how they learned all that medicine.

They swim in schools.

What I don’t understand about medicinal leeches is how they learned all that medicine.

They swim in schools.

Electric eels teach them how to charge.

SO. MUCH. FAIL.

SO. MUCH. FAIL.

That is heinous- why the hell would they even divide the words up into gender categories?

For those who don’t want to click the link (and I don’t blame you), these are high-quality print ads for the .XXX pornography web domain suffix that play on the idea that internet porn is “moving” to .XXX.

WHOA… THERE IS PORN ON THE INTERNET?

What I don’t understand about medicinal leeches is how they learned all that medicine.

Honestly, they suck.

What I don’t understand about medicinal leeches is how they learned all that medicine.
They have annelidical minds.

Bleedin’ parasites!

A couple of points agreeing that this is an unusually cogent and thoughtful National Wrecked Pew post:

1) ” . . .may universally rally behind the murderer of a child simply because of the races of the people involved”– so they are supporting a half Hispanic brown person’s right to blow away others. Proving the Right is NOT never no racist!

2) O’Sullivan spelled the adjective “vile” correctly, and didn’t write “vial” as all you uppity, educated, ivory-tower lib’s would expect. Therefore conservatives are intelligent and not wingnut anti-intellectuals.

Suck it, Libs!

Larry’s eyes are blue. Curly’s eyes are green.
.

They have annelidical minds.

Annuli about everything, Mr. Clyde if that is your real name.

Ok. It is 80 degrees outside, and 85 inside. As much as I want to, I will not turn on the AC in March. Across the street is a party, loud bad party rap (“let’s have some 40’s, go shorties, porta potties, I drive a Lexus, gogogogogogogo”). And one little girl trying, Tremors’ style, to set a record of pogo-sticking. Up to almost an hour now. She’s good, really. But…

The pogo stick needs to go under an oncoming bus. Now. Sans little girl, I’m not a right-winger or nothing, but the thumpety-thump of bus tires mushing the springy-thingy would be a pleasant sound before bed.

Ok. It is 80 degrees outside, and 85 inside. As much as I want to, I will not turn on the AC in March.

What about May? Like the third day, even?
.

the thumpety-thump of bus tires mushing the springy-thingy would be a pleasant sound before bed.

Little girls are springy?

the AC in March

Ummmm. Hmm. That would be May. One too many Vodka-Sprites. Fudge.

Little girls are springy?

Only those with curly hair. You could run an 8-day clock on Shirley Temple.

Vodka-Sprites. Fudge.

Shoulda just had a black cow, man.

And the Dragon-King will reply (several hours later) “The fact is, what you were doing to the yeast and their brothers, I was doing to your mom.”

I was doing to your mom.

Boiling her?

Obligatory: HOT.

Steamy.

There was froth involved.

Was the froth santorish?

Mothelfuckel.

Just found out my buddy Ross, Grand Kahuna of scootnashville.com, was damn-near kilt, last night, by a hit-and-run driver in a blue 4-door Toyota. He’d just bought a Buell Blast from someone in the last several days.
.

Awww, sweet Jeebus. I just noticed that Cerb’s been sneaking snarking awesome into mouseover text. I hope teh hamsters can take all teh archive retrieval I’ll be asking for.

Sorry to hear that JP. Also sorry I didn’t hit reload before commenting. Fuck I look like an asshole.

JP, he going to be alright? Best wishes, man…

You people be nice to my bros!

Oh damn, sorry JP. I was riffing on the yeast thing, I meant no disrespect.

One too many Vodka-Sprites. Fudge.

omg…you are such a minnesotan it isn’t even funny!

also too…best wishes to your buddy jp…

I just noticed that Cerb’s been sneaking snarking awesome into mouseover text.

I only read this site on my tablet. Damn.

JP, he going to be alright? Best wishes, man…

Yes, it seems so. He has broken bones and assorted contusions, but was wearing pretty-full gear (not riding pants). His most pressing problem was a tear in his aorta, which they immediately repaired via cardio-cath at Vanderbilt MC rather than taking him to the ER, first. Just as I was going to bed, I got a text from one of the other scooter minions who said starting this morning, he can have two visitors at a time in ICU. So I’ll go tomorrow morning.
.

Fuck I look like an asshole.

Naw, naw… we’re here to riff and have fun.
.

Ross just got this bike, a Buell Blast (motorcycle) last weekend. Witnesses told police the car — a hit-and-run — was entirely at fault, and Ross was riding responsibly. He had all but riding pants on, gear-wise.
.

‘kay JP. Hope they get teh lousy shitbag. Who fucking runs away after mowing down a bike?

‘kay JP. Hope they get teh lousy shitbag. Who fucking runs away after mowing down a bike?

If I had to guess, in that neighborhood? Someone with warrants.
.

Oh geez.. Hope your friend makes it through this in one piece, JP.

Oh dear.

I hope your friend can be fixed up as good as new with just a few cool scars. Having said that, you scooter types are hard core, If I told my motorcycle friends that I was getting a scooter, I doubt they would arrange to have me hit by a car.

JP: How bad is it? Have you heard?

Jesus–I just saw your earlier post. Hope dude is ok.

ATGATT should be every rider’s mantra. All The Gear All The Time. Saves lives. And fuck that hit and run driver in the skull with an ice auger. Put the word out to the motorcycle guys too, there’d be solidarity even if was on a scooter. Find that piece of shit.

They have annelidical minds.

Well played, old chum!

Larry’s eyes are blue. Curly’s eyes are green.
But Moe has got the prettiest eyes that anyone has seen.

Best wishes to your friend, JP. And double what everyone said about finding the shitstain who hit him.

You have to be the biggest idiot alive to run from the scene of an accident. That’s a felony. Fucking asshole. WTF is wrong with people?

WTF is wrong with people?

How much time have you got?

Best wishes to your friend, JP.

Wishing a speedy recovery to your friend. What a horrible, horrible story.

Hey, JP, it could have been worse. He could have lived in Combovia.

Who has two thumbs and is a moron? THIS GAL!

Only way I can exercise these days is to take Lord Chubbington out for brisk walks. It was partly cloudy but I thought I’d be extra-brisk and run some circuits. Bout 2/3 of the way through it started to rain. With about a fourth of the way to go it started REALLY raining. I started running again. I got soaked. Baby got mildly damp and we both made it home before it started to downpour and the thunder started.

There’s nothing like trying to haul ass pushing a 35-lb stroller and a 25-lb pound baby. Whew! [/moron]

OK, I just looked up stroller weights for shits and grins. They do not way 35 lbs. They just feel like they do. Oh no…wait. Looks like mine may weigh around 26 lbs.

It was partly cloudy but I thought I’d be extra-brisk and run some circuits. Bout 2/3 of the way through it started to rain. With about a fourth of the way to go it started REALLY raining. I started running again. I got soaked

You couldn’t have known that you’d get caught in such a crazy downpour.

There’s nothing like trying to haul ass pushing a 35-lb stroller and a 25-lb pound baby. Whew! [/moron]

Shya, what if the baby is carrying a twenty pound cat, like JP’s Curly?

I remember when Sadly, No was a mom-and-pop-and-Mencken snark store, not the industrial concern it is today.

Shya, what if the baby is carrying a twenty pound cat, like JP’s Curly?

When JP checks in, we’ll have to ask him if he jogs in the rain with the cat. Because that would be AWESOME.

I remember you could read the S,N front page for only a nickel. And you’d have change left over for a virtual shoe-shine.

I remember when there was a much more pervasive zombie presence.

I’ve found that cats love it when you pet them backwards. They also really enjoy this trick of mine where you hold them and make them walk along the floor. I have numerous scars from demonstrating these techniques.

I remember when there was no such thing as the internet, and we had to do chat rooms by Pony Express. It was all very confusing.

Hey, JP, it could have been worse. He could have lived in Combovia.

In Combovia, your helmet needs no helmet.

I’ll add my best wishes for your MC friend JP — any bike wreck sucks but a hit-and-run is horrible!

I actually recently considered getting rid of my Triumph — just not riding it all that much and in the winter time the gear requirements are a bit much, and it is risky.

But then the weather starts getting better and I look at it and think: fuck that.

They also really enjoy this trick of mine where you hold them and make them walk along the floor.

Ahh, the Cat-a-barrel, one of my faves.

JP, thank the FSM that your friend is gonna make it. As a cyclist I appreciate the vulnerability of the two wheel jockey.
.

In Combovia, I am sure that even after you have shown the long-form, vault copy of your birth certificate, you would be unable to obtain health insurance.

Holy FSM! The ROTC is having their “Joint Forces Review” on campus today, and evidently that included a fighter jet flyover at low elevation which just happened. It would have been nice to know that was happening before the damn thing scared me out of my chair. Crap that was loud!

Why, other than cowardice, would you post that anonymously?

What must it be like to be such a horrible shit all the time? Why must wingnuts be so goddamn awful every moment of the day?

With braids? Get a rope.

Oh and I meant to post this earlier for vs:

[Alanis]
It’s like ray-ay-ain on your walking day…
[/Alanis]

When I first started running a few years ago I was passed in a race by a woman pushing a jogging stroller. That was a bit discouraging.

In Combovia hair combs you!

When I first started running a few years ago I was passed in a race by a woman pushing a jogging stroller. That was a bit discouraging.

That exact thing has happened to me. It’s not a big ego-boost.

I hate racists. I said it.

So this asshole just constantly stalks this site 24/7 waiting for a chance to jump in with some sort of racist gotcha?

HOOOOHKAY

Racism: Join the debate!

http://chronicle.com/blogs/brainstorm/the-most-persuasive-case-for-eliminating-black-studies-just-read-the-dissertations/46346

http://chronicle.com/blogs/brainstorm/black-studies-part-2-a-response-to-critics/46401

https://chronicle.com/blogs/brainstorm/editors-note/46423

VS, AlaniOBS,

What in hell y’all worried about. Personally, I might beat the lady with the stroller if’n there was a cheeseburger at the finish line, but I wouldn’t bet the rent…

So this asshole just constantly stalks this site 24/7 waiting for a chance to jump in with some sort of racist gotcha?

Well, he can’t jump in the hot tub, so he consoles himself is such fashion. The weird part is hunting down a police report for an incident involving someone else’s friend.

Dennis,

Saw you on “To Catch A Predator” last night. The Furry thing is a surprise…

You admitted that you instinctively barked at the African American male that showed up when you were cornered by two dogs on your run, but then were shocked to find out that he was there to help you. Your instinct showed you to be the racist

No, I barked at him because he came out of his house when I screamed for the people to get their dogs and thought they belonged to him YOU DUMB FUCK. I would have been equally as snippy had he been white. Interesting how your mind works, though. Talk about revealing racism…

The weird part is hunting down a police report for an incident involving someone else’s friend.

Thats some high quality (if misplaced) Google-fu right there.

The Bland Leading the Bland.

So, let’s see. We had racist Anonymous at 19:13 and Dennis at 19:34. Hmmm.

RIP MCA

http://gawker.com/5907713/beastie-boys-founding-member-adam-mca-yauch-dead-at-47

RIP MCA

Obviously, another victim of the Kenyan Usurper… the Obama Death List grows.

RIP MCA

Damn. Double damn.

RIP MCA

Cookie Puss weeps…

My daughter’s fish is called Cookie Puss. But as a Carvell tribute.

Ooooh look at the badgers! They’re so kewt. AND THEY’RE DANCING!!!!

“ding, ding, ding”

Sounds like the trolly trolley is arriving on track 9.

My daughter’s fish is called Cookie Puss. But as a Carvell tribute.

Cookie Puss was created in Tom Carvel’s image.

Yikes, another one for Obama’s Death List.

Dennis, defender of African-Americans and implacable foe of racism!

vacuum, your anecdote made no sense at all other than to degrade African Americans, who you felt obliged to say that your intention wasn’t to intended to tell the story of some “magical negro”. It was ‘see, negroes can be good people sometimes too’.

That starts with premise I think most blacks are suspect. I don’t. But what’s really obvious is that YOU DO. I told a story that plainly calls racism out. Anyone without reading comprehension issues will see that. Try your Jedi mind tricks on someone dumber.

For you, Dennis: That hit and run driver, whatever color or nationality, is a shitstain, with or without braids.

And if anyone had done that and found out the driver’s race and gender, it’s a virtual 100% certainty you all wouldn’t have been calling him a “shitstain” like you did.

You have this very odd notion of what we are like. Troll, I judge people by the content of their character, not the color of their skin. This guy was and is a shitstain. For that matter, Allen West is a shitstain. Jesse Lee Peterson? Shitstain. .Dennis? Shitstain.

Stop arguing with strawmen. Hell, stop arguing. Get a hobby, go for a walk, go jump in a lake.

Now, KILLFILE ENGAGED! Dancer badgers are go!

BTW, “Braided Shitstain” would be a good band name.

You have this very odd notion of what we are like. Troll, I judge people by the content of their character, not the color of their skin. This guy was and is a shitstain. For that matter, Allen West is a shitstain. Jesse Lee Peterson? Shitstain. .Dennis? Shitstain.

Santorum? Shitstain.

Denny,

Saw your Craigslist ad, and while I don’t know much about the collectible market, I think you are asking too much for the velvet painting of Justin-Bieber-As-Sad-Clown. Especially, as you put it, ‘gently used’.

I want to thank Dennis for confirming to us that when he hears a story about some despicable action by someone, his first thought is: “What color was that guy?”

Your post made no sense at all, vacuum.

I think it makes perfect sense if you’re not a racist troll with reading comprehension issues.

I want to thank Dennis for confirming to us that when he hears a story about some despicable action by someone, his first thought is: “What color was that guy?”

What’s great about Pennis is that he also is offended by the racism in an entry I wrote. (That clearly is not racist and is, in fact, calling racism out.)

Pennis,

You suck at being human. No one, especially but not exclusively here, likes you. We would pity you if you ever made the least effort to take off your blinders. When you die, no one will mourn your passing. I’d tell you to suck my cock but lord only knows where your mouth has been.

Sincerely,
Pupienus

Dennis, you obviously are using too high a bar for “shitstain.” For example, you’ve never seriously injured anyone in a hit and run AFAIK, and you’re still a shitstain.

“Of course you say that now, smedley.”

Most of what I say and write is in real time.

Just…for the record, here’s a snippet from my entry:

“Anyhoo, long story short, lots and lots of blacks in my last neighborhood. Like, every other house. So I was jogging in one of the tonier areas of my neighborhood and there are two dogs in the front yard of this one house. They went after me like I was made out of ham. All I got was a tiny nip on the ankle. They weren’t large dogs, but they were large enough to put a scare in me. Scared, angry me stood in the middle of the street, kind of paralyzed, screaming for the home owners to get their fucking dogs. A large black man comes out of the house behind me. I snippily ask if these are his dogs.”

I’ve just explained that my neighborhood is largely comprised of black folks. So when a…wait for it…black guy comes out of his house because I’m screaming for people to get their dogs, I ask if the dogs are his. Now, someone not mentally retarded would assume that I asked him because the dogs were the vicinity of his house and he was the only one who responded to my cries for help. A dumbfuck troll however would assume I asked him if the dogs were his BECAUSE HE’S BLACK. EVEN THOUGH I JUST EXPLAINED THAT MANY OF NEIGHBORS ARE BLACK.

Really, Pennis, please set yourself on fire.

Ya know, Pup, you haven’t written any good food pr0n at your blog lately.

Last night, I slow-roasted a breast of lamb and used the rendered fat and some olive oil to saute some onion, carrot, celery, and garlic with some coriander, a touch of cumin, and a tiny bit of cinnamon, then added some bulghur and frozen peas to make a kickass pilaf.

So last night we’re headed from Providence RI to Fort Wayne IN.

We’re descending into Fort Wayne and we get a datalink message from the company saying “Flight xxxx is down for maintenance, we need you to go to Rochester (Minnesota)”

So we’re flailing about bringing up charts for Rochester, checking the weather, checking the fuel and trying to work with Chicago Center (who’s really busy) to get us headed up that way.

I’m looking at the radar, and of course there’s a big line of thunderstorms across northern Illinois and Lake Michigan. We manage to pick our way between the cells (with Chicago’s help) and get on the other side of the line.

Right about then we get another message from the company. “Flight xxxx is fixed, head back to Fort Wayne”.

Fuck!!!!!

So check the fuel (again) bug Chicago Center (again) and head back through the line of thunderstorms – fortunately the gap we shot through was still there.

Then reprogram everything for Fort Wayne. Get in there 20 minutes late. Get to Memphis 20 minutes late (so much for my nap).

Then, of course, the entire East Coast has crappy weather when we get back to Providence at 6:00 AM. Fly the ILS almost down to minimums before we break out and land.

Just another night hauling the freight.

Flight xxxx

The cargo was some extra-raunchy pr0n.

Hauling the freight…

Sounds like a hell night, Major.

Oh, by the way, the exact same happened to me a week or so ago. Dog is following me around the neighborhood. This time, it’s a couple of young black kids–teens/early 20’s standing out in front of their house. They assume the dog is mine. I assume its theirs. Anyway, they were fucking lovely and helpful as could be. We stood out on the sidewalk talking and trying to figure out what was going on. Here’s the interesting thing–the tags put the dog in the NEIGHBORING STATE. I’m assuming it was a from a family new to the neighborhood.

And the dog–who thank goodness was incredibly sweet–followed me most of the way home.

What this thread needs is a good shaggy dog story.

inish the story for everyone, vacuum. What did your little anecdote prove?

What was different from any other neighborhood? What did the race of the fellow have to do with anything?

That answer to both questions is ‘nothing’.

You’re retarded.

I told the story in response to Derp, who claims that whites should avoid black neighborhoods. Now, obviously this is anecdotal evidence, my experiences were a small rebuttal to that.

Seriously, did you READ what I wrote?

I gotta stop wearing my Ham cologne.

What this thread needs is a good shaggy dog story.

I hear Mitt Romney’s got one.

Damn, I thought you wrote “shitty dog story”.

I gotta stop wearing my Ham cologne.

What, Jonah Goldberg try to bite you?

Major: A little biplane crashed last night at the tiny Chicago exurb airport near me, killing the two occupants. Apparently they got into trouble after takeoff, tried to land again and got caught by the wind. For some reason I thought of you. Yikes. Glad you made it through those storms. (You had to run that gauntlet twice, for no reason? Damn, I would have been cursing those company retards until the radio melted.)

A little biplane crashed last night at the tiny Chicago exurb airport near me, killing the two occupants.

Curse you, Red Baron!

Major: A little biplane crashed last night at the tiny Chicago exurb airport near me

Which airport? I used to live around there.

Not a great night for flying a light aircraft.

Oh look, how delightfully fascinating – the pathetic attention-whoring griefer strokes again.
Please feel free to continue feeding my killfile, you absurd little man-child.

The perpetual name-dancing is the tell: you’ve got jack-shit to say here worth the time it takes to read it – & even YOU know it … but you just can’t resist an opportunity to inflict your weak shit on other people, because it’s probably the only thing you’re semi-skilled at any more.

Do you dare to eat a peach take a hint? It’s on the house.

See ya, wouldn’t want to be ya.

I’m sure pennis will look it up for us and let us know if any of the passengers were blah-

Last night, I slow-roasted a breast of lamb and used the rendered fat and some olive oil to saute some onion, carrot, celery, and garlic with some coriander, a touch of cumin, and a tiny bit of cinnamon, then added some bulghur and frozen peas to make a kickass pilaf.

Sounds awesome BBBB.

Wow step away for a bit and find that some cowardly racist asshole who has a hard on for attacking the ladies has stunk up the joint.

I have heard tell of the Pennis, but had not really seen his bigoted bravado in action.

The weakest of sauce can often spoil the best of meals.
.

Why do you try to engage Pennis? Waste of time. One could write a longish comment explaining that writing a letter to JP’s super complaining that he … what, omitted the irrelevant matter of the driver’s skin color from a comment he made on the internets has dick-all to do with the Donaldeeeeee business. One would explain that JP wants people to look for a blue toyota with damage, not look for a car driven by a black person. One would explain that even without that inanity the two situations have absolutely nothing in common. But one would be wasting their time. Pennis does not engage, see?

So I recommend following my example of just insulting him. Pennis, you aren’t a shit-stain, you’re more just plain shit. Excess human baggage. A walking argument for retroactive abortion (always good to toss some eliminationist rhetoric in there, y’know?). Your mother cries because she didn’t abort you. Your death would be a net positive for the entire world. I fart in you general direction. Now go away or I shall taunt you again.

Charlie’s real father is almost certainly Frank Reynolds. Frank had a one night stand with Charlie’s mother 30 years ago. (“Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad”) Frank forced Charlie’s mom to have an abortion but it “didn’t take” and Charlie was born three months later. (“The Gang Finds a Dumpster Baby”)

Sounds like you got a dose of Fugly Stew there, Major.

Lightning Tag: the second you’re “it,” the game is probably already over.

Which airport? I used to live around there.

Lake in the Hills, in McHenry County.

Addednum to my last comment: I would have been cursing over the radio if I had the balls to even be piloting an airplane in the first place, which would only happen in an alternate universe.

Pup, I think that you have insulted the noble skidmark by referring to Troolio here as one.
.

I have heard tell of the Pennis, but had not really seen his bigoted bravado in action.

Wow, you were really missing out. No wait, no you weren’t. Not at all. Nunh uh.

Pennis, you aren’t a shit-stain, you’re more just plain shit.

Now, now. Plain shit can be useful as a fertilizer. Stains are just ugly, smelly and useless.

Where’s tsam? He’s gonna be so sad he missed the visiting troll.

I gotta hop off to work… I won’t be commenting for a few hours. Don’t feed the troll, because he only poops in the hot tub. I don’t want to dip in for a relaxing soak, only to find that the tub’s filled with poopwater.

No wait, no you weren’t. Not at all. Nunh uh.

Thankfully it looks like he took his ball, told himself that he won one for the “Gripper” (which would be his ruddy right paw…IYKWIMAITYD) went home to pleasure himself before staking out another female target on the intertubes.

There used to be this awesome site with a bunch of trollish types illustrated and catagorized almost to a Linneaus level. I forever kill myself for not retaining a bookmark or copying the site in full, because it was genius and a laugh riot.

Any Sadly that might have a link would earn my eternal thanks and praise.
.

Lightning Tag: the second you’re “it,” the game is probably already over.

Lightning strikes are more common than you think. It doesn’t usually do much to the plane. Not something you want to happen, of course.

We try to keep a safe distance from the storm cells. 20 miles if we can.

http://flightaware.com/live/flight/FDX1254/history/20120504/0054Z/KPVD/KFWA

Courtesy of Metafilter: this beautiful document proves that one day, if we do but heed his wisdom, both man & cat alike will sing the praises of their mutual saviour – Arthur Paul Pedrick.

…only to find that the tub’s filled with poopwater.

How else are we gonna get our game of “Battleship” on?
.

In lieu of troll food, have a bit of Beer Pron:

Bottled up a brand new recipe last night that had been aging: imperial brown ale. 8% abv. Aged for three weeks in the secondary on oak chips that had been soaked in bourbon.

It is to fucking die for! The oak flavor is noticeable, yet subtle, and lends a really nice bit of complex vanilla notes. There is just the tiniest hint of bourbon in there too, mostly in the nose.

It’s going to be a painful wait while it bottle conditions.

The big Oregon Homebrew Festival is coming up in two weeks, gonna head down and drop off a bunch of entries here in a few minutes. It’s a qualifying event for the Masters Championship of Amateur Homebrewing. If we (me and my brewing partner) win a category we get to enter that beer against all the other winners across the country. Got six entries in different categories so we’ll see how it goes.

St. jim, Now Officially Tired Of Your Weak Shit I finally got around to looking at the linked product of evolution bit. thanks for that.
.

Cool link Major.

I like the little dance you made over the lake. Happy you made it through.
.

It’s going to be a painful wait while it bottle conditions.

Do you drop in a bit of yeast during that period?

Sounds delish BTW
.

Major: Stupid me didn’t get the point of your link until my stupid finger accidently hit the mouse wheel and enlarged the map. Wow. I now am going to appreciate my next FedEx package that much more.

Do you drop in a bit of yeast during that period?

No, the yeast goes dormant during the secondary fermentation and oak aging, but doesn’t actually die off completely. Just before filling bottles, we add a small amount of priming sugar to the batch and mix it in well. Once in the bottle, the yeast will wake up, chew on that, produce CO2 as a waste gas, and because it’s in a sealed space (the bottle) the CO2 goes into solution and you end up with carbonated beer. Takes a couple weeks to reach full carbonation.

Hopefully that will still work even though I forgot to recite the St. Crispin’s speech…

Commercial breweries that filter their beer but still want to bottle condition can’t do it that way — they’re removed all of the yeast with the filter. In that case, they actually inject a slurry of yeast cells and sugar into each bottle to do a similar thing.

As a home brewer, you can actually get the yeast out of the bottom of one of those commercial bottles and then culture it to use it. Unfortunately, some commercial brewers now use a different strain of yeast just for bottle conditioning that isn’t actually that great as a yeast for main fermentation, so you need to know it’s really what you want before going to that trouble.

And now you know more than you ever wanted to know about bottle conditioning of beer.

Sounds delish BTW

Oh it is, it is… I wish I had some right now.

And yes, that means we’re all drinking yeast POOP! when we drink beer — C02 and alcohol are their wastes… Mmm, yeast poop…

oh man, I’m going crazy reading all this beer pron.

Bottled up a brand new recipe last night …

I’ll be there by three o’clock.

Not beer porn related, but S/N territory here.

Courtesy NMMNB: http://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2012/05/figures-obama-to-officially-launch-2012-campaign-on-karl-marxs-birthday/

Yeast POOP is GOOD!

Lunch today is the rest of the AWESOME “wild” mushroom soup I made for last night’s dinner and the last of this batch of sourdough, toasted and buttered.

Fucking dairies. So, I buy the butter that’s on sale. Yeah, I have made my own on occasion but the commercial stuiff is good enough for most things. One dairy puts their unsalted butter in blue wrappers, salteed in red. The other dairy does it exactly backward. Another dairy I believe changes it randomly. They don’t have much pribnt on the paper wrap to say which it is. So I’m all the time trying to figure out what that stump of the stick in the fridge fucking IS. Fucking dairies.

I was wearing the Ham cologne yesterday. I cured a pork shoulder as a mildly spiced ham, put it in the DIY sous-vide for 36 hours @ 138F and took it out yesterday morning after work. Half was dried off and put in the drying chamber (old fridge @55F, 60% humidity, already occupied by some three week old guanciale) the other half smeared with a jerk rub and put in the smoker on oak and hickory @ 175F for five hours. I separated the fat cap from the ham and rendered it into a pint of spicy lard. By evening I was pretty well engreased but it all went pretty well.

Tuesday night I fed a work crew before an evening of sweaty farm labor; they’d brought in some deer steaks and I made Szechuan orange peel beef and vegetables using venison instead of beef, one of my favorite ways to serve deer. It surprised the work crew but they rallied to finish it.

Oh my, do go read the comments at dyx’s link. If you want to laugh. They’re hysterical in all senses ofthe word.

#1 May 3, 2012 at 11:31 pm
mcc commented:

So as Barry launches his campaign, LA medical examiners launch an investigation into another suspicious death…From MinutemanPAC email:

The suspicious timing of the death of Andrew Breitbart’s coroner has opened a new
…

#3 May 3, 2012 at 11:36 pm
Andy commented:
Now we know why Cinco de Mayo is suddenly a big holiday. It’s all about celebrating Karl Marx! Sounds like the work of La Raza, doesn’t it? Well, not all of us are fooled so they can take their holiday and shove it up their you know what!

#4 May 3, 2012 at 11:43 pm
MVH commented:

Of course he is. He doesn’t have to hide anything. What with the Fourth Estate protecting him.

Short of committing murder, Obama is not obliged to give any accounting. He lives and acts as if there will be no day of reckoning.

#7 May 3, 2012 at 11:53 pm
Justice Beaver commented:

Nothing is a coincidence with these fiends. And then they’ll whine and snivel and overreact when they get called on it.

#8 May 3, 2012 at 11:58 pm
Alana commented:

Not surprising, considering his older daughter’s initials are MAO.

Opaobie commented:

“If I had a son, he would be just like Barack Hussein Obama”. ~ Karl Marx

#13 May 4, 2012 at 12:51 am
BS61 commented:

These will be the US’s future holidays – part of the Obama’s plan to rewrite history!

#14 May 4, 2012 at 12:59 am
S. Wolf commented:

That Marx?

‘Who wrote a poem containing this verse?

Like unto a God I dare
Through that ruined realm in triumph roam.
Every word is Deed and Fire,
And my bosom like the Creator’s own.

It was our old friend, Herr Karl Marx, no less. So modern Leftist elitism is not exactly new. In this poem, old Karl actually compares himself to God. Beat that! Not much doubt about where he was coming from. Modern day Leftist elitists are actually quite modest by comparison.’

MARXIST ELITISM

Not Hussein bin Obama the arrogant narcissist.

#16 May 4, 2012 at 1:20 am
S. Wolf commented:

This sounds like Hussein’s view of the TEA party:

‘”May the devil take these peoples movements, especially when they are “peaceful””‘

MARX DESPISED PEACEFUL POLITICAL MOVEMENTS

Which explains the violent Weather Underground and occupy rabble.

MARX ADVOCATED TERRORISM

And so does Ayers.

#19 May 4, 2012 at 1:53 am
DREAMS FROM MY NEIGHBOR commented:

The Kenyan Occupier of 1600 is an ILLEGAL ALIEN.

FORGED Birth Certificate: Confirmed.
FORGED Selective Service Registration: Confirmed.
FAILED E-VERIFY: Confirmed.

We knew this before 2008 – and the stupid GOP and mis-educated public ignored the warnings. (I say mis-educated because the Left has thoroughly infiltrated the public educational system, filling young mind with propaganda and stupidities.) Even that useful idiot, McLame, had the temerity to say we shouldn’t worry if the SOB became president. Now we are in the vice grip of the fast-approaching tyranny. If Romney doesn’t start articulating the urgent need to restore the constitutional republic, we will face one of the most violent and oppressive dictatorships of all time. I say that because the fascists on the Left and their Islamist cohorts have been salivating over us for many decades. We are their chief prize.

A warning from history.

Thanks for the detailed description OBS. I had forgotten about the priming sugar.
.

Pupienus, were I to write the same letter to JP’s boss that actor212 wrote to Donald’s boss that made you guys squeal with delight, then I suppose you’d be justified in calling me a shit stain.

You still can’t get over the fact that Great Dane beat me up the stairs the night your mom conceived you, can you?

Now do those commenters all have their own tinfoil hats or do they share?

Troll ass kicked*? Check

*NOTE: Your ass has just been kicked by Actor212™ (a wholly owned subsidiary of Actor212 Enterprises™, a Cayman Islands corporation)

…the fascists on the Left and their Islamist cohorts have been salivating over us for many decades.

I used to have that problem, but Trident Pucker Me Berry gum cleared it right up.

to gateway pundit or not to pundit that is the que…Oh I see that pup max has sealed the decision for me. I wasn’t feeling all that adventurous anyway.
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Just skimming I see
Marx
Ayers
Hussein

CAN I GET A “SOROS,”PLEASE?!!

Jeebus H El Manquécito, between you and pup Max I don’t know if I could take anymore food Pr0n. you guys certainly have a way with keeping my salivary glands in excellent shape.
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Lunch today is the rest of the AWESOME “wild” mushroom soup I made for last night’s dinner and the last of this batch of sourdough, toasted and buttered.

Can you hear drool through the computer? AFAF and totally not me.

In the Portland subreddit you’ll often find someone telling prospective newcomers: “Seen Portlandia? Most people think it’s sature. Nope, pure documentary.” That is only a slight exaggeration. It does make me feel that I need to stand up for my adopted hometown. So, Finding Portland: http://player

byline=0&color=ff9933

I must confess, I dont’ even know what sature is.

Now do those commenters all have their own tinfoil hats or do they share?

Sharing=SOCIALCOMMIESHARIATWISLAM.

So I’m thinking not so much. Each one of them should have stock in the Reynolds corporation.

The last one was particularly juicy. Sometimes I wonder if we even live on the same planet as these goons, or if they occupy a parallel universe whose interwebs occasionally get tangled up with ours.

Somehow I don’t think they’d be that nuts if Obama was white and his last name Smith (they’d be nuts, just not quite as crazy.)
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Provider, I think they’d still think he was the devil and illegitimate…but his race does add a really nice thick extra ugly layer of crazy.

Finding Portland: http://player

byline=0&color=ff9933

That was pretty neat. They could have spent a bit less time on timelapse freeway scenes and actually gone down a single track through Forest Park or one of the other amazing parks or something though.

To be fair, Bill Clinton drove them to tantrums of self entitled paranoia as well.

nice vid pup. Portland is a pretty town. Do you guys have a minor league baseball team?
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I’ll be there by three o’clock.

Cool, but that beer won’t be carbonated for a couple more weeks so we’ll have to drink something else. On the strong end of things I can offer you a delicious Baltic Porter or an Imperial IPA, or perhaps you would enjoy a nice Biere de Garde? Maybe you’d enjoy a bit lighter fare — I also have a very tasty Northern English Brown Ale, nice and fresh the way it should be. I think I have a couple bottles left of a Belgian Strong Brown that has been aged to perfect too. Also.

My homebrew stash is at a historic high level right now… Alas, such a problem to have!

Do you guys have a minor league baseball team?

Sadly, no.

VS, agreed. I am still going with my alternate Universe theory, where maybe their Obama is actually a leftist, or resembles one in ways that ours does not. I think string theory would provide for occasionally tangled interwebs.

That shit pup dragged back was some of the craziest shit i’ve seen in a while. Even the shithouse rats are pointing and laughing.
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Bill Clinton drove them to tantrums of self entitled paranoia as well.

Hillary was the one that killed Vince Foster!!!eleven!

Imperial IPA

Oooohh, me want some

To be fair, Bill Clinton drove them to tantrums of self entitled paranoia as well.

True, Helmut, but this has a different feel about it, taking it to another level.

Sadly, no.

That sucks. I’d take a single or double a team in a pinch

Crap OBS. i didn’t realize you had lost one that had been around for over 100 years. That sucks.
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Now we know why Cinco de Mayo is suddenly a big holiday. It’s all about celebrating Karl Marx! Sounds like the work of La Raza, doesn’t it?

I always thought it was just another excuse to sell beer. Besides, they should love Cinco de Mayo – it celebrates defeating the French.

That sucks.

Yeah, it does.

We have a great local team in the “West Coast League” which is a Summer season for college players. The Corvallis Knights — they play at the OSU baseball stadium here so it’s at a great facility, tickets are reasonable, and they serve beer.

No baseball that I’m aware of. But I don’t care a rat’s bum about baseball. If it had fossil fuel engines it might be interesting …

And now you know more than you ever wanted to know about bottle conditioning of beer.
No mention of Krausening!

If it had fossil fuel engines it might be interesting …

And no more CART race at PIR either! But there is fütbol though if you’re into that sort of, uh, thing.

I’m not all that much of a sports or baseball fan — I will never watch a baseball game on TV — nevar!!! — but I do enjoy going to see a game in person occasionally.

Besides, they should love Cinco de Mayo – it celebrates defeating the French.

Unfortunately that would require an operational grasp of History which really isn’t in their wheelhouse.

But I don’t care a rat’s bum about baseball. If it had fossil fuel engines it might be interesting …

[starts contemplating where one might bolt a hemi to a baseball team]
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I will never watch a baseball game on TV — nevar!!! — but I do enjoy going to see a game in person occasionally.

Television never did the game any justice. last time I saw one live up in Indy I caught two foul balls. One thing I like about the game is that you can keep the souvineers.
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No mention of Krausening!

OK, here you go.

DOES A BITCH NEED TO GET CUT?

I felt a tremor in the internet force. Got here as soon as I could.

I suppose the little bitch is still lurking–in which case–FUCK YOU DENNIS.

The horror! On a SNARK blog, no less.

HAHA Spokane gots a minor league team with a racist name and EVERYTHING!

HAHA Spokane gots a minor league team with a racist name and EVERYTHING!

Same name for the minor league team in Indianapolis.
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Despite the best efforts of the cerveza industry the 5th of May is hardly noticed in most of Mexico. There’s a celebration in Puebla, de cierto, and lots of happy hours and 2 X 1 specials in Cancun, PV, Zihuat, etc. but it’s entirely ginned up by the hospitality cartels. For a great Mexican holiday, a real celebration, I always recommend El Noche de Los Rabanos in Oaxaca. Now that’s a fiesta.

If Indianapolis isn’t a denigration of first nations people I don’t know what is.

I think .Pennis is a columnist at the NY Post:

As long as the Nets are allowing Jay-Z to call their marketing shots — what a shock that he chose black and white as the new team colors to stress, as the Nets explained, their new “urban” home — why not have him apply the full Jay-Z treatment? Why the Brooklyn Nets when they can be the New York N——s? The cheerleaders could be the Brooklyn B—-hes or Hoes. Team logo? A 9 mm with hollow-tip shell casings strewn beneath. Wanna be Jay-Z hip? Then go all the way!

You can totally tell hollowpoint bullets by the shell casings.

Also, nice bit of racism there, you piece of shit.

Spokane comes from the name Spokann Garry, a leader of the Spokann tribe that got wiped out by Col George Wright who has a fucking street named after him. We’re pretty down with insulting natives up in this joint.

Oh my, do go read the comments at dyx’s link. If you want to laugh. They’re hysterical in all senses ofthe word.

Jeffraham needs to print that out and present it as supporting evidence for ratcheting down the LSD levels. “The water smells like a psychedelic swimming pool!”

No mention of Krausening!

Hey, the Heileman brewery put myself and a sibling through college, and enabled my parents to retire comfortably. Don’t mock the World’s Largest Sixpack!

Spokane comes from the name Spokann Garry, a leader of the Spokann tribe that got wiped out by Col George Wright who has a fucking street named after him. We’re pretty down with insulting natives up in this joint.

America has a long, proud tradition of naming places after the things and people that were wiped out to make room.

America has a long, proud tradition of naming places after the things and people that were wiped out to make room.

See, for example:

Beauty, KY
Best, TX
Bountiful, UT
Carefree, AZ
Celebration, FL
Friendly, WV
Ideal, GA
Lovely, KY
Paradise, MI
Success, MO

Also too: Humansville, MO

Growing up in Chicago, myself and associates were “fully kraeusened” on teh Old Style beer a good part of the time. It was good clean stuff and way better than most of what was available back in the PBS* days.

*Pre-beer snobbery.

For Major Kong

I gotta disagree with you John. I grew up in Chicago and I think Old Style was, and still is, insipid industrial garbage.

Major sir, why do you hurt me?

Sorry. I know everyone in Chicago grows up drinking Old Style I never could develop a taste for the stuff.

See, for example:

Intercourse, PA

Meh, when you can make a pale stale ale with the foam on the bottom THEN we can talk.

So, you were drinking what? Budweiser? Hamm’s? SCHLITZ??>?

Because back then, those were the only tap beers there were, pretty much, in Chi.

Hmph. I say GOOD DAY to you, sir.

I think I liked Olympia back in the day.

Budweiser is not beer. NOT BEER.

It’s some insipid blend of rice, methanol, and un-organized workers tears. It shouldn’t be considered fit for human consumption. Hell, it shouldn’t be considered fit for embalming fluid.

Idiotville, OR does not follow suit.

Way back when the Virginia. Is for lovers campaign was new some wags printed up addendum stickers reading “but only Pennsylvania has Intercourse. But then, Pennsylvania also has Blue Ball. Something to do with HITLER I suppose.

Oh well, off to another night of dodging thunderstorms.

Couldn’t get Olympia on tap back then………….cans yeah. It was okay.

However………………..my GOOD DAY!! still stands. Sir.

Good luck major! Catlike reflexes! Don’t have the fish!

If Indianapolis isn’t a denigration of first nations people I don’t know what is.

If indy is not a denegration to everything that is good and holy I am not sure what is. And while both my parents were born there and while it can be argued that I was born south of the Mason Dixon line, I am glad that they depositied my ass here.
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Oh well, off to another night of dodging thunderstorms.

Good luck sir.

At least it will be an interesting evening, though perhaps more interesting than you would like. If you were to drop a flight # we might follow you.
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Mess belatedly cleaned up.

I wish there was a way to have all incoming calls that have blocked caller ID to go straight to vxmail. Does anyone answer such calls? If you’re it in my contacts I won’t answer, sometimes even if you are. So maybe that’s a bit out there but blocked numbers!?! People actually answer?

JP: How bad is it? Have you heard?

Ross’ aorta repair is A-OK, and he did not need cranial surgery to repair bleeding in his brain. He apparently was in a coma for a bit, but was awake and responding to and with smart-assed comments, today. 🙂 He goes under the knife tomorrow for some bone-knittin’.

ATGATT should be every rider’s mantra. All The Gear All The Time. Saves lives. And fuck that hit and run driver in the skull with an ice auger. Put the word out to the motorcycle guys too, there’d be solidarity even if was on a scooter. Find that piece of shit.

I am guilty much of the time of only wearing a helmet, and now the boots and often the armored jacket, but often not on rides that aren’t part of my commute. Bad Me. I will get some good summer gloves next weekend, after the paycheck clears.

When JP checks in, we’ll have to ask him if he jogs in the rain with the cat. Because that would be AWESOME.

Haw! Me, jog? 😆
.

See, for example:

Don’t forget Intercourse, PA!

People actually answer?

HEEEELLLLLL NO.

Doctor offices confirming appts and shit like that will leave a message. Otherwise, if I don’t know your number, ain’t gonna be no answer.

Did all the anon/Pennis posts get whacked? I missed all that while at work, it would seem.
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Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

May 5, 2012 at 1:10

See, for example:

Intercourse, PA

WHATEVER!

Pretty Boy Being Pretty.
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Speaking of riding, I feared I might be late this morning, and I’m wanting to be a Model Citizen because I love this fucking job so much. So, with 25 minutes to go until 8:00 a.m., I took the exit to I-24 @ Thompson Lane this morning. I stayed with the flow of traffic, and arrived at work 15 minutes early. So, 10 minutes from Thompson Lane to the plant, using I-24. Good to know.
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My GAWD, those are some gorgeous eyes. But have you seen my son’s BUTT?

Wait. Is that a weird question to ask?

But have you seen my son’s BUTT?

H=Who hasn’t?

The delete key looks EXACTLY like the equals.

Let me test that th

Speaking of thunderstorms: Best. Alarmclock. EVAR.

Also, shut up, librulz – Teh Noodge is SO a Nice Guy!

Romney/Nugent 2012!

POOP

You upsidedownies and your strange courtship rituals.

The past tense of ‘shit’ is NOT ‘shitted.’

Oh, & speaking of storms:

NRO wonk commits Heresy In Teh Firstest Degree, shitstorm ensues.

jim, do you spend a lot of time hanging out on sites with homosexual tendencies? Not that there’s anything wrong with that, mind you. I myself go there often. Just askin.

POOP

It’s a shame that further editons of the book will be changed… don’t scat aficianados deserve representation in romance novels?

The Nuge is charmingly naive- does he really think that a bunch of young, enlisted types want to hear his crap that was recorded long before they were born?

The past tense of ‘shit’ is 1970s fashion.

jim, do you spend a lot of time hanging out on sites with homosexual tendencies?

No, but oh my stars & garters, they’ve sure been a wingnut-busting goldmine lately.

Also, their web design is simply FAAAAAAAAABULOUS.

Attention euphemism fans:

Officials say that messages on social media that led to the cancelation of classes at Hartland High School were not threats, but were rather about masturbation.

According to a report by The Livingston Daily , Livingston County Prosecutor David Morse says the statement that really started the controversy was “I’m polishing my rifle.”

There used to be this awesome site with a bunch of trollish types illustrated and catagorized almost to a Linneaus level. I forever kill myself for not retaining a bookmark or copying the site in full, because it was genius and a laugh riot.

Any Sadly that might have a link would earn my eternal thanks and praise.

http://redwing.hutman.net/~mreed/

MOAR P00P.

Nude post. I mean, new post. We don’t need to see Jim Hoft nude.

Bill Clinton drove them to tantrums of self entitled paranoia as well.

Hillary was the one that killed Vince Foster!!!eleven!

‘zactly.

It was all the women in the admin they feared and resented. Wingnut boards were in a perpetual lather over Janet Reno which has barely abated to this day.

[…] Sadly, No says it all. […]

[…] know, I used to be baffled. When I wrote my original post I was rather taken aback by all the right wingers masturbating on how awesome it would be if Norway […]