Aspergers Vinaigrette Will Make Your Pee Smell Funny And Other Conservative Insights
ABOVE: Heather Mac Donald
Shorter Heather Mac Donald, America’s Shittiest Website™
The NYT’s Front-Page Voyeurism
- Disabled people belong in institutions not in sympathetic newspaper stories
Surely, you think to yourself, not even the unspeakably vile Heather Mac (“with a white space”) Donald would write a column, even at America’s Shittiest Website™, complaining about a story sympathetic to the plight of autistic adults. Certainly, even she would not declare that such people are too icky to have their relationships described in a newspaper of general circulation like the New York Times. Certainly it can’t be true that Heather, in the waning days of the year would interrupt her vacation to labor over long blog post mocking people with autism as socially inept weirdos undeserving of the attention of normal people like herself when she could have been sitting calmly by the fireplace reading Atlas Shrugged and sipping a tall tumbler of White Zinfandel on the rocks. Sadly, No!
The feminization of journalism reached a new low this week with the New York Times’ front-page story on a sexual relationship between two teenagers with Asperger’s Syndrome.
You know perhaps Heather has been sipping too heavily on that tumbler of White Zinfandel on the rocks because this sentence makes absolutely no sense. Even taking for granted that feminizing something is a bad thing (which Heather, who more or less appears to be a woman, oddly takes for granted), how does this story “feminize” journalism. Did someone tie a pretty pink bow around it or sell the reality TV rights to Bravo?
Although the article in question runs to over 5,000 words, Heather zeros in on the several paragraphs that she seems to think talk about sex, but which in large part talk about kissing and cuddling, in order to ramp up her outrage that the New York Times would force her to read about physical contact between weirdos.
It gets worse. Next up: the couple’s erotic proclivities, recounted in excruciating detail.
Heather then quotes a few paragraphs dealing with a back massage, kissing and hand-holding. I was expecting to get a graphic description of mutual oral sex or something but, alas, the excruciating detail of their erotic proclivities scarcely makes it past what I think the kids still call first base.
Inexplicably, the Times fails to give us Jack and Kirsten’s favorite coital positions, or the details of their foreplay; such matters await in another article, no doubt.
One minute Heather was bitching that she was getting too much information and now she’s complaining that the story doesn’t tell us who’s on top. Am I the only one with a sneaking little suspicion that Heather is a little disappointed that she got all her tingly parts warm just to be let down by the absence of a money shot?
But if Heather is upset that she didn’t get a money shot, that doesn’t stop her from giving us one:
There may be a place for an exhaustive account of the most quotidian aspects of Aspergians’ lives in order to — I can hear the pitch now — “illustrate their challenges and triumphs in achieving personal intimacy.” That place, however, would once have been the Women’s pages. Now, every page of the Times is a Women’s page. Any hierarchy between public and private has been obliterated; what was once considered the “masculine” realms of politics, war, and diplomacy, worthy of front-page treatment, now possesses the same claim on the reader’s attention as the most treacly or gratuitously explicit details of people’s private lives. … Likewise, in many college history departments, courses in political history have been crowded out by a focus on previously “silenced” identity groups, usually female and non-white, rather than on individual (mostly male) leaders and thinkers.
I have to say that part of me is in awe as to how quickly and easily Heather can morph a story about two autistic adults into the perennial wingnut butthurt about the oppression of white men by crippled black Lesbian academics.
The “Aspergians have sex” story is not even a case of the “personal being political”; it has no political import. The couple is not oppressed by racist, classist, sexist, or heterosexist social structures; they merely respond to some emotional and social cues differently than the norm.
And to prove her preposterous notion that Asperger’s adults are treated just like everyone else and aren’t subject to any societal discrimination, Heather then, just a few sentences later, calls them “Asperger’s syndroids.” I suppose from her point of view she was showing her personal compassion for their plight by calling them that rather than simply “retards.”
I just have one remaining question. If any story unrelated to invading foreign countries, calling the President a Kenyan Muslim socialist or ridiculing the French (“politics, war, and diplomacy”) is only fit for a “Women’s” page, shouldn’t Heather’s own little rant about this be relegated to a new “Women’s” page at America’s Shittiest Website™? Isn’t she herself feminizing journalism? And if the measure of good journalism has something to do with a penis and testicles, I suggest that she try, no matter how hard and admittedly distasteful it might be, to look between her own two legs and see if she notices a penis and two testicles there. Or even, say, just one testicle.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Tard sex is hawt!
The “Aspergians have sex” story is not even a case of the “personal being political”; it has no political import.
Has she read any newspaper in the past, say, two hundred and fifty years?
Does she even realize that this is the time of the year that the NY Times does it’s “Most Neediest” charity campaign?
Is she a fucking idiot?
Asperger’s isn’t even a severe condition, as these things go. I mean, it’s not a blowjob from Salma Hayek with a mouthful of honey either, but it was originally coined so as to throw full-blown autism into sharp relief. The point is, if she’s terrified of Asperger’s sufferers, god knows what she makes of Down’s syndrome or Cerebral Palsy or neoconservatism.
Actor, why do you ask questions when you already know the answers?
Actor, why do you ask questions when you already know the answers?
Well, the middle one might actually be a fair question to pose.
Besides, every once in a while, I like to throw a bone.
There may be a place for an exhaustive account of the most quotidian aspects of Aspergians’ lives in order to — I can hear the pitch now — “illustrate their challenges and triumphs in achieving personal intimacy.” That place, however, would once have been the Women’s pages
She’s aware of the fact that an individual named “Jack” is most likely to be a man, or, at least, a proto-man, right?
So I guess the question here is, “ZOMG, what does Heather have against Teh Menz!?”
The take-away here, of course, is that Heather herself probably suffers from some form of Asperger’s and is probably just expressing her frustration at not being a porn star for it.
Ms MacDonald might be under the influence of white zin, or perhaps she has Asperger’s. I’ll bet Bill Frist could tell!
Heather MacDonald is an academic troll who usually wastes text space justifying police brutality and over-incarceration with sloppy citations of scholarly papers that misrepresent their findings. She also works for the biological racists at the Manhattan Institute.
If the NYT article had been about PUA nerds, she probably wouldn’t have had a problem with it:
http://www.city-journal.org/2008/18_4_darwinist_dating.html
How can you tell which newspaper pages are the women’s pages? Do they have little breasts on them or something?
Ms MacDonald might be under the influence of white zin, or perhaps she has Asperger’s.
Asperger’s is one of California’s finest vintners, altho they’re hard to find because they’re bad at communicating.
How can you tell which newspaper pages are the women’s pages? Do they have little breasts on them or something?
Page Six?
Jesus. She plays a grownup in her dissembling on behalf of every NYPD excess. But she shows her true wingnut colors here. Do you think her discomfort with frank talk about sex could be related to her fetish for police brutality?
How can you tell which newspaper pages are the women’s pages? Do they have little breasts on them or something?
I would imagine they’re more absorbent, for, you know, those heavy days.
Well, in my experience, they generally have lots of swooshy italic serifs and light sans, often in pink. And quite often they have “for women” written on them just to scare any particularly stupid men away.
How can you tell which newspaper pages are the women’s pages?
Because they’re strong enough for a man, but were made for a woman.
How can you tell which newspaper pages are the women’s pages?
They don’t say anything because they expect you to know already.
Besides, every once in a while, I like to throw a bone.
is that what the kids call it now?
they merely respond to some emotional and social cues differently than the norm.
Like by publishing bitchy, self-contradictory nastiness that should have remained private?
Does she even realize that this is the time of the year that the NY Times does it’s “Most Neediest” charity campaign?
Does she even realize that this is the week after Christmas, when there is very little of the hard, masculine, superior kind of news going on, so every newspaper puts something a little different on the front page?
Has she ever read a newspaper? Does she know what a newspaper is?
Because they’re strong enough for a man, but were made for a woman.
Stop by Human Resources and pick up your internet.
Her whole rant is how she’s offended reading about people she cares nothing about. An alt shorter might be: “Sound and fury, signifying nothing but dickishness.”
Ya know, I expect verbal diarrhea from men which can be best summed up with “Girls are dumb and totally have cooties”…but I admit it always takes me by surprise when women grace us with this shit.
I expect verbal diarrhea from men which can be best summed up with “Girls are dumb and totally have cooties”…but I admit it always takes me by surprise when women grace us with this shit.
You’re surprised because you have dumb cooties.
hard, masculine kind of news
News is HOT!
You’re surprised because you have dumb cooties.
What are smart cooties?
You’re surprised because you have dumb cooties.
WRONG. My cooties are male, which makes them hard, strong and smart. Also funny and proactive.
Has she ever read a newspaper? Does she know what a newspaper is?
DOES SHE EVEN EXIST? DO ANY OF US?
My cooties are male, which makes them hard, strong and smart. Also funny and proactive.
You have a male cooter? Damn those Scandinavians and their operations.
Alternate shorter:
It’s just sad that we don’t have enough WAR! KILL! HATE! to fill up the front pages of the NYT and must supplement them with girly stories about people who have overcome difficulties to find love. How am I supposed to get my girl-boner with that shit?
DOES SHE EVEN EXIST? DO ANY OF US?
We’re thru the looking glass!
Alternate shorter:
It’s just sad that we don’t have enough WAR! KILL! HATE! to fill up the front pages of the NYT and must supplement them with girly stories about people who have overcome difficulties to find love. How am I supposed to get my girl-boner with that shit?
Shorter WC shorter: What is the sound of one jerk fapping?
Bingo. “The story should have been about meeeeee!”.
I guess the Asperger’s keeps her from realizing “Hey! I could just NOT READ this stuff”.
They don’t say anything because they expect you to know already.
Flawless victory, tigris.
~
There may be a place for an exhaustive account of the most quotidian aspects of Aspergians’ lives,,,
d00d! Aspergers.
Wait. OMG! Maybe it’s contagious!
There may be a place for an exhaustive account of the most quotidian aspects of Aspergians’ lives
Those Aspergians…why can’t they take their tidy quotes and go back to Aspergersland where they came from?
The Financial Times is the women’s paper. That’s why it’s pink.
See the fawning over Bush’s flightsuit & padded jockstrap (or the spontaneous joyful howl of satisfied bloodlust that met the news of Obama killing Osama) for evidence as to just how “feminized” the media is these days.
First thing that springs to mind? Nietzsche used to boo-hoo a lot about the nefarious influence of the feminine in culture too, but he had a damn good excuse for doing so: untreated syphilis.
If you’re ever invited to Mac Donald’s house you might want to not use her bathroom & just wait until you can get back home, is what I’m saying here.
How can you tell which newspaper pages are the women’s pages?
The i’s are dotted with smiley faces?
The Financial Times is the women’s paper. That’s why it’s pink.
Isn’t the IBD pink also?
Or is that from the Inflamed Bowels?
If you’re ever invited to Mac Donald’s house you might want to not use her bathroom & just wait until you can get back home
I’m sure she has some convenient houseplants I could use.
I’m sure she has some convenient houseplants I could use.
She’s got a lovely hydroponic Asperger’s crop you can avail yourself of.
How can you tell which newspaper pages are the women’s pages?
The i’s are dotted with smiley faces?
HEARTS–Duh.
Um…if she said :
Then said:
Doesn’t that make her -I don’t know- a fucking liar?
Or maybe this is just another entry in, “I’m sure they don’t vote Republican, so I hate them.”
Women can’t be funny, so clearly you’re a dude.
Doesn’t that make her -I don’t know- a fucking liar?
Not sure about the fucking part, given her extreme prudishness.
I love teh Grey Lady correction. Best EVAR.
A bit of prejudice and stereotyping from teh author? I think so. Of course Kirsten visualizes Twilight Sparkle, everyone is supposed to visualize TS – that’s teh flipping nature of My Little Pony. Even if Rainbow Dash is objectively teh best pony. FFS, you’d think that teh “Paper of Record” might not be so blitheringly ignorant.
Pinkie Pie is clearly the best pony.
I’ve always thought “Asberger’s” sounds like the worst item on the menu in a really bad restaurant:
“I dunno, I guess I’ll have the (sigh) Ass Burger.”
I got nothing re: ponies, but Roy’s post today is a thing of beauty.
I just read the article. There is no mention of erotic proclivities. Heather is either totally full of shit, or has never had sex before.
Spear, you are an idiot. There is no pony bettar than Rainbow Dash.
Heather is either totally full of shit, or has never had sex before.
It’s not necessarily an either/or… My vote is for both.
FYWP. Stoopid thing doesn’t seem to understand “blockquote.”
“I dunno, I guess I’ll have the (sigh) Ass Burger.”
If you watched South Park, you’d know that the Ass Burgers contain the essence of every fast food known to man.
There is no pony bettar than Rainbow Dash.
Well, that’s a pretty stupid way to spell Rarity. What are you, some kind of ‘Sperg?
“I haven’t had sex in years and have never had a so-called orgasm so why should a right-thinking Catholic girl like me have to read about mongoloids gettin it on in a newspaper that prints my batshit columns? Is no one else outraged?”
(I bet she hated that movie Adam)
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:
Pinkie Pie>Rarity>Fluttershy>Twilight Sparkle>Rainbow Dash>Applejack
I’d be willing to switch Fluttershy and Twilight Sparkle; I like them both about equally. The rest are solidly in their places.
Jesus God, is this the gottverdammt bronies’ page? Bring back the women’s page so we can at least get a recipe for them.
so why should a right-thinking Catholic girl like me have to read about mongoloids gettin it on
Did somebody say mongoloid?
I just read the article. There is no mention of erotic proclivities. Heather is either totally full of shit, or has never had sex before.
When I was five I thought that babies came from sitting next to a girl and holding her hand. Heather’s parents must have just decided that there was no point in explaining something that would never be relevant to her.
The worst part is Hillary Clinton oppressing us all with her I HAVE A VAGINA face. Every time I want to stimulate myself with a little politics, war, and diplomacy, she forces me to think about her menstrual cycle.
What’s really funny is that the NYT article goes out of its way to mention that the guy in the relationship is a glibertarian. Of course, it’s entirely possible she deliberately skipped this out of fear that someone might make the connection between wingnut thinking and a psychological condition preventing you from understanding how people who aren’t you think and feel, but it’s not as though her readership would ever puzzle that one out in the first place.
Also: Heather and Virgin Ben should hook up, if only because their shared paralyzing fear and hatred of the existence of hoo-hahs might reduce them to gibbering shutins for the rest of their days.
…
No, wait, never mind, I think they must have already hooked up.
Has she ever read a newspaper? Does she know what a newspaper is?
I prefer the original ‘Tommy’ lyrics.
I prefer the original ‘Tommy’ lyrics.
Heh.
.
Heh
Indeed.
I got nothing re: ponies, but Roy’s post today is a thing of beauty.
Now we know who “Derek” was…
Also: Heather and Virgin Ben should hook up
Aw, fuck! I’m fresh out of brain bleach!
The worst part is Hillary Clinton oppressing us all with her I HAVE A VAGINA face. Every time I want to stimulate myself with a little politics, war, and diplomacy, she forces me to think about her menstrual cycle.
All politics is menses.
wev, d00d. This isn’t a discussion about which pony you liek best, although that you picked teh one with teh most pr0n-ish name says something.
One of teh main six ponies is teh fastest, strongest and most capable of completing her pony duties fastest. One pony received her cutie mark before the others. One pony stands head and shoulders above all teh others in terms of raw talent and ability. You can have whatever favourite you want, but Rainbow Dash is objectively teh best pony.
wow…after a rough morning spent with super dave of the it department, i have my computer back…
i must say, heather has given me a huge sad with her inability to empathize even one little teensy-weensy bit, but the pony discussion has brought me back to happy…
for the record, i rate for pinkie pie only because she is the only pony i know…and i only know that from the daughter…and the only color in her world is pink…duh…
and so, by that logic, i feel fully correct to state that heather mac[whitespace]donald is a world class twunt…
our girls h.s. basketball team is playing in the annual holiday tournament today…they are playing a school called acgc which stands for atwater-cosmos-grove city. knowing this fact does not deter me from hearing it as ‘ac/dc’…this gives rise to some pretty good visuals…
This isn’t a discussion about which pony you liek best, although that you picked teh one with teh most pr0n-ish name says something.
SuckleDKWmom?
this gives rise to some pretty good visuals…
Um, bowchickawowwow, stranger?
One of teh main six ponies is teh fastest, strongest and most capable of completing her pony duties fastest.
And gets shit tips for her Johns.
oh, for feck’s sake! that anonymous is me…duh…computer reset and all that…
Um, bowchickawowwow, stranger?
more like a montage with ‘highway to hell’ blaring in the background as the band takes the ball to the hoop whilst mowing down little white girls…
oh, for feck’s sake! that anonymous is me…duh…computer reset and all that…
It IS you! Thank the Maker!
Ooops! There I go again, trying to curry favor and friendship….next thing you know,
SteerpikealecWhaleChowderrandom self-hating gay“Dennnis” will be all over my ass….Give her credit for openness with the gender roles, i.e. “anything life-threateningly significant is ‘masculine’ while the ladeez should concern themselves with trivial entertainment”.
Shouldn’t she be shutting up and making a sandwich?
Does Rainbow Dash have a pet toothless-alligator named Gummy?
No?
I didn’t think so.
more like a montage with ‘highway to hell’ blaring in the background as the band takes the ball to the hoop whilst mowing down little white girls…
Have to admit that I was leaning, for no apparent reason, toward the visuals from “Smells Like Team Spirit.”
Well, no apparent reason aside from the obvious.
The REAL story buried under the headline is that (presumably) someone pays for the crap this woman writes. Jesus. It’s like giving your kid a nickel for taking a dump on the floor.
what was once considered the “masculine” realms of politics, war, and diplomacy
Errrr, she does realize our Secretary of State is Hillary Clinton, right?
I mean, I know the rumours and all but she still dresses like a woman.
The REAL story buried under the headline is that (presumably) someone pays for the crap this woman writes. Jesus. It’s like giving your kid a nickel for taking a dump on the floor.
are you talking about heather mac[whitespace]donald? or nyt writer? either one works for me…
The REAL story buried under the headline is that (presumably) someone pays for the crap this woman writes.
I don’t know for sure, but I think NRO is a shared co-op in terms of revenues.
But that still means someone pays NRO something to advertise there…
WTF, WP? “Unknown error”‘s ass.
Wait. Did WordPress buy Disqus?
more like a montage with ‘highway to hell’ blaring in the background as the band takes the ball to the hoop whilst mowing down little white girls…
The little white girls are probably taller than much of the band.
.
I could read posts wherein DK-W and Spear argue about Little Ponies all day long.
I’m not joking. It makes me smile.
I could read posts wherein DK-W and Spear argue about Little Ponies all day long.
I’m not joking. It makes me smile.
this is a relief to hear…i thought i was the only one…their knowledge of my little pony both amuses and frightens though…
it appears they are both swingeing mylittleponyists…
it appears they are both swingeing mylittleponyists…
Now you have me laughing like an idiot. Dammit.
.
Some people liked my Tennessee Sunrise.
No, that is not a mixed drink.
.
*fistpump* yes!
“this is a relief to hear…i thought i was the only one…their knowledge of my little pony both amuses and frightens though…”
It’s charming!
Now if anyone needs a debating partner re: Phinnaeus and Ferb, I’m ur gal
Now if anyone needs a debating partner re: Phinnaeus and Ferb, I’m ur gal
lewis and clark, here…man, i need to lighten up…
Now if anyone needs a debating partner
yr doing it wrong!
d00d!? Tank teh
TurtleTortise!*fistpump* yes!
Worse yet, I initially read that as “*fishpump*…”
.
yipes…the girls lost 63-33 w/20fricking9 turn-overs…it’s going to be a long season…
also, too…tomorrow ac/dc takes on cgb…i can’t wait to listen…
damn nymfail! *shakes fist*
For those without an MLP programme:
Twilight Sparkle is teh “leader”. She’s a bookish egghead who is intended as teh main viewer surrogate in teh series. This makes her default most popular. Also, since she is viewer surrogate, she reaps teh lion’s share of teh “hero’s exemption” stuff.
Pinkie Pie or Diane, is teh party-animal who has clearly abused too much horse tranquilizer. But in a cheerful and perky kinda way. Liek one part Keith Richards and one part Rachel Ray.
Rarity is sassy. And stylish. And fierce. Her power is fabulousness.
Fluttershy is teh pony with Aspergers. Seriously NYT, WTF?!
Applejack is teh farm girl pony. She’s a little bit country.
and Rainbow Dash is objectively teh best pony. Teh most talented flier in Ponyland. Capable of teh legendary and long-thought-to-be mythical Sonic Rainboom. She is teh fastest and most capable of all teh ponies. Plus she’s a pain in teh ass, with a streak of anti-authoritarianism and tendency towards shit disturbing. In MLP mythology, Rainbow Dash is both teh Chosen One and teh Trickster.
it appears they are both swingeing mylittleponyists…
nttawwt
For those without an MLP programme:
It wasn’t a request.
This comments thread is cracking me the fuck up.
.
This comments thread is cracking me the fuck up
You holding, dude?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
December 29, 2011 at 22:51
For those without an MLP programme:
srsly, d00d…thank dog ultra ninja is a young girl…or i would rilly be worried about you…
nttawwt
exactly…afaf…
I think Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie should have some sort of race or debate or wrasslin match. Because
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE.
I think Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie should have some sort of race or debate or wrasslin match. Because
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE.
The High Horser
srsly, d00d…thank dog ultra ninja is a young girl…or i would rilly be worried about you…
Start worrying. Ultra Ninja is much too young to be into MLP. This is all on teh Dragon-King.
Ponies don’t solve problems with violence. Unless they are Rainbow Dash. So Rainbow Dash wins in that case – it’s not a fair comparison.
Children’s cartoons, liek a lot of other comics and animated stuff, is full of that story-telling stuff. Archetypes, callbacks to established myth, tropes and idioms. But since they are aimed at kids and teh nominal target audience is expected to outgrow it early, it’s not as baggage laden as Teh Batman or Spiderman or wevs. Plus there’s a recognition that tossing in a few jokes for teh parents forced to watch along could be good for return viewership and toy sales (i.e. Teh Simpsons Principle). That makes some kids shows actually interesting to analyze.
Teh current MLP showrunner, Lauren Faust, came from Powerpuff Girls and Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends – to give you an idea of teh tone of teh show.
“Well, if you don’t know, I’m certainly not going to tell you!”
Children’s cartoons, liek a lot of other comics and animated stuff, is full of that story-telling stuff.
this is true…i had quite forgotten, since my babbies are 22 and 26…although, of course, the daughter still loves kids’ shows and movies…although she likes things like teen mom and pitbulls and parolees as well…i wonder what heather mac[whitespace]donald would make of her
…anyhoo, i think adults on the whole should sit down every once in a while and watch some kiddy teevee…it never hurts to be get a refresher in the basics…
i think adults on the whole should sit down every once in a while and watch some kiddy teevee…it never hurts to be get a refresher in the basics…
Without Warner Brothers cartoons, I’d know nothing of physics.
Without Warner Brothers cartoons, I’d know nothing of physics.
All I know about geography, I learned from Yakko Warner.
I can’t believe people are seriously arguing about whether Pinkie Pie or Rainbow Dash is the best pony.
It’s like you’ve never even heard of The Great And Powerful Trixie.
It’s like you’ve never even heard of The Great And Powerful Trixie.
Married to Ed Norton, right?
i think adults on the whole should sit down every once in a while and watch some kiddy teevee
It’s never too late to have a happy childhood!
You can only be young once, but you can be immature FOREVER.
It’s never too late to have a happy childhood!
At least until you’re born
I tried being grownup once. It wasn’t much fun and I wasn’t very good at it.
Children’s cartoons, liek a lot of other comics and animated stuff, is full of that story-telling stuff. Archetypes, callbacks to established myth, tropes and idioms.
Well that’s a new one…”Oh I only watch cartoons for the mythology and storytelling elements.” Suure.
Dude, if that’s what you’re into, wear it proud! Don’t hide behind teh academicals.
Also. Suggested nym change: Oedipus.
Too.
”Oh I only watch cartoons for the mythology and storytelling elements.”
I watch them for the falling anvils and exploding ACME products.
It’s like you’ve never even heard of The Great And Powerful Trixie.
um…NO! she solved mysteries with jim and honey and the gang…duh!
”Oh I only watch cartoons for the mythology and storytelling elements.”
I watch them for the falling anvils and exploding ACME products.
Don’t lie, furry lover. We’ve seen your cockpit.
We’ve seen your cockpit.
speak for yourself…i’m only on a first nym basis with the dude…
Seriously, guys; do you think our government is arguing over dolls and action figures as if they were aliv-er, never mind. Carry on.
Don’t lie, furry lover.
Uh oh. Someone told him about the Wile E. Coyote suit in my closet.
”Oh I only watch cartoons for the mythology and storytelling elements.”
For some cartoons, this is true. Who doesn’t love a good story?
Also re:Oedipus? I think you’ve got me mistaken. Oedipus slept with his mother, I sleep with yours.
Oedipus slept with his mother, I sleep with yours.
BOOM!
Don’t lie, furry lover.
ack…i read this as actor calling mk his ‘furry lover’…now i can’t quit shuddering…
…what was once considered the “masculine” realms of politics, war, and diplomacy,
Nice job packing multiple forms of sexism into a comment on two young persons who love each other despite mild difficulty, Heather. Did it ever occur to you that “masculine” approaches to “politics, war, and diplomacy” tend to make the first and last into the middle one, really quick? And that this might not be the best possible outcome? Of course not, you crass excuse for a sagging bag of saline, because you righties cared only about the power-boners you got from watching W prance across the flight deck behind his ludicrously-overstuffed codpiece. The thousands of dead Americans, the tens of thousands of dead Iraqis, all meant nothing to your “pro-life” sensibilities.
Heck, we’re lucky she didn’t conclude her garbage with, “We should always have been at war with East Aspergia.”
I’m totally down and HEP with watching kiddie shows…but The Simpsons is in no way, shape or form a kiddie show.
the
“masculine”“mescaline” realms of politics, war, and diplomacy,Fixxorated for hallucinogenic distortions of reality.
Pryme: Thanx for the weirdness of the X-Men legal wrangling. (0:30) Mutants aren’t people, but corporations are? WTF?
As a lady, Heather doesn’t have testiclay — perhaps, little lady testiclay.
Uh oh. Someone told him about the Wile E. Coyote suit in my closet.
Meep meep!
…what was once considered the “masculine” realms of politics, war, and diplomacy,
Nice job packing multiple forms of sexism into a comment on two young persons who love each other despite mild difficulty
Also ignoring the fact that male-types aren’t totally averse to sexy stuff, as evidenced by half of the couple and most porn.
Neither were Looney Tunes. Those cartoons were made for all audiences and were shown in theatres before the feature-length films. It’s only later when television came along that cartoons became viewed as strictly children’s fare. Not that there’s necessarily anything wrong with things made for children, as the modern My Little Pony teaches us.
I grew up with Animaniacs, Pinky and the Brain and Freakazoid! (and The Simpsons and Looney Tunes, but, again, those weren’t really kids shows). I saw so many Apocalypse Now parodies growing up that by the time I saw the actual movie (at 13), I had practically seen it already. I remember an Animaniacs episode that had Dustin Hoffman, Meryl Streep and Michael Richards sitting at a table in a Hollywood restaurant as a background joke (the cast of Kramer Vs. Kramer sitting with the guy who played Kramer, in case you don’t get it).
Some of the cartoons I liked as a kid turned out to be crap, but a lot of them hold up pretty well.
And, as a kid who loved mythology, that actually was a major draw for me at least.
I read some of the quotes, scratched my head, and muttered fuckizzis?. (Actually, my reaction to a lot of Wingnutiae I encounter here and at Wo’C). Then I scroll up and look at her pic again, and it all becomes clear. This person is having No Fun. No Fun at All. No wonder the idea of a couple of autistic kids having some (and her being denied the delicious details in the story) just really ruins her fucking day. I urge everyone who lives anywhere near her to go over to her house and have fun* on the sidewalk right out front. She’ll know it. She’ll sense it right through the concrete walls and blackout curtains and over the sound of Firing Line reruns on the TV. And it’ll make her brain hurt…
* No, not that kind, you’ll get arrested, silly. Maybe some Karaoke or something.
ack…i read this as actor calling mk his ‘furry lover’…now i can’t quit shuddering…
Sweet dreams bbkf. Sweet dreams…..
Heather McDonald had a cooch
E-I-E-I NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
I love all this fucking “family newspaper” BS. What were the Meese and Starr reports? Oh right, taxpayer-funded.
The holidays have been SO DISAPPOINTING.
Ed Schultz is in Iowa interviewing potential voters, and most are talking about Santorum. I bet it’s eating Ed inside that he can’t suggest that they should Google the guy for more information.
most are talking about Santorum.
Yep, Santorum is on every Iowan’s lips.
Yep, Santorum is on every Iowan’s lips.
Yes, they are foaming — or even frothing — at the mouth.
I grew up with Animaniacs, Pinky and the Brain and Freakazoid!
Loved Animaniacs and Pinky & the Brain!
One is a genius, the other is insane.
(I grew up with the original b & w Popeye cartoons on TV.)
Speaing of Googling people, some funny shit happened with Mike Krahulik of Penny Arcade. LOL.
Oh, this shit is ON LIKE TRON now!
Twilight Sparkle? Rainbow Dash? Fluttershy?
Bronies PLEASE.
A well-maintained Annihilator X-100 could render that entire flock of over-rated prancing prats into puddles of glue without even removing the covers from its rocket-tubes … & keep in mind that the Annihilator is a LIGHT MechaPony™.
wev, d00d. You forget that Friendship is Magic.
Friendship is Magic.
So…Marcus Bachmann is your favorite pony?
A well-maintained Annihilator X-100 could render that entire flock of over-rated prancing prats into puddles of glue
Good choice! The Ultimate Death Ray has greater range, true. But the UDR doesn’t leave puddles of glue (or anything else) behind . No profits at all.
You forget that Friendship is Magic.
We all forget sometimes. Which is why the ponies are so important.
Also, Spear, I forgot to commend you on your fine taste in animated shows.
Also too it should be noted that “The Incredibles” was not a kiddie film. It was a film for adults (mostly) that happened to be animated. That was Brad Bird’s intent.
A well-maintained Annihilator X-100 could render that entire flock of over-rated prancing prats into puddles of glue
You forget that Friendship is Magic.
Friendship with the pony with the big-ass gun sounds pretty fucking Magic.
And friendship with the pony with the big ass-gunis still more exciting.
OK, scrolling past the comments because this is too perfect not to share:
“Gingrich Plunges, Santorum Surges” http://i.imgur.com/l9Mpg.jpg
Someone at CNN has a wicked sense of humor.
DKW’s link at 3:28 makes a lot more sense of this amusing but cryptic image.
Totally O/T but this is a presentation I heard at IT security conference – it’s called Cyberwar in the Age of Total War. I just found that it had been posted. It’s an interesting take on applying traditional warfare rules into the cyberspace.
Heather M(space)D thinks she is just voicing the thoughts of all those other wing-nuts out there that freaks, gimps and cripples need to be kept completely out of sight, lest God-fearing Chrrrrristians catch teh Crip virus.
“It’s completely normal to want anyone other than White, Straight, Handsome Males and Females to hide in the shadows! It’s what America was founded on! It’s… what? What do you mean it’s bigoted, hateful, cruel, and small-minded?”
The heavy dose of sexism and woman/self hatred is to keep her WingNutMasters happy, as she’s contractually obligated to be a hateful bigoted excuse for a human being and sexist in every article. The whining about “icky” sex is all her, though.
Does anyone else remember the (unintentionally) hilarious movie Like Normal People? HM(space)D would have an aneurysm at the thought of two “mentally challenged” people getting it on like they did in that movie. All the pair in her article did was cuddle, and she’s acting like it’s the end of the world as we know it.
WTF is up with these crappy third generation pony names? When I was a kid, we had ponies with names like “Sundance” and “Starflower” and “Powder”. “Pinkie Pie”? Please.
As far as Heather Mac D is concerned, I can see why she might object to a humanizing story about two young people with a disability that causes them to be constantly dehumanized. She is a flaming asshole, after all.
Santorum strongly supports assbiters syndrome!
Wait! Wait…even funnier! Assburglars syndrome!
Assburglars is exactly what Ron Paul is afraid of, I hear. And the best way to prevent assburglars is to always keep some Santorum handy.
, god knows what she makes of Down’s syndrome or Cerebral Palsy
Lampshades and soap?
Dawg have mercy! How long ya’ think a person has to be backed up to produce a big, steaming, pile of shit like that?
My Little Pony…the Care Bears could shred them, eat them. and crap out a better cheap toy marketed to morons…
The Lost Little Pony RULZ!!11!!
Does John Stewart love caulk more than he loves freedom?
http://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2011/12/wordpress-takes-down-bare-naked-islam-after-threats-from-cair/
Hoo boy.
Hoo boy indeed. That’s some scary stuff there.
Those comments are…whew…
It’s pretty funny that one guy talks about America bowing to sharia and how Muslims can get away with anything while Christians are unfairly persecuted because some website was kicked off WordPress(GASP!) for making threats and encouraging violence and a couple posts later folks are talking about some ex-CAIR people being put in prison for funding people who made threats and encouraged violence…
Does John Stewart love caulk more than he loves freedom?
Without caulk, what would we use as cupcake icing on April Fools Day?
FYWP. A perfectly good comment got eated because I used the common name for a holiday. Let’s try again:
Does John Stewart love caulk more than he loves freedom?
Without caulk, what would we use as cupcake icing on April 1?
I don’t usually get out of the boat, hell, I rarely leave the lounge, but I read the comments at Andrew’s link. Somehow I don’t feel the hot, heavy boot of Shania law on my neck the way those commenters do. Just for instance, no mullahs have prevented me hanging pancetta in my utility room, or using ham hocks and white bacon in the Hoppin’ John and collards that I’m preparing for NYE.
Somehow I don’t feel the hot, heavy boot of Shania law on my neck the way those commenters do.
On the other hand, those Christian Fundamentalist bastards can’t seem to keep their hands off my ovaries.
Here’s the type of comments that could be found at the now shut down anti-Muslim blog:
http://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/cair-asks-fbi-to-probe-internet-threats-to-mosques-134497303.html
On the other hand, those Christian Fundamentalist bastards can’t seem to keep their hands off my ovaries.
You have to admit, those ovaries are HAWT.
You have to admit, those ovaries are HAWT.
At my time of life, they’re intermittently boiling.
Shorter Henry Mac Donald: “God damn it, you kids get off my lawn!”
Assburglars Sin Drome!™
Parking in the rear…
Hey, you can’t *tm* “Assburglars Syndrome”, that’s mine! You owe me an internickel ™ every time you use that expression.
I also have a patent on referring to next year as “twenty-dozen”. I invented that. If you want to use it, even in casual, IRL conversation, you will have to pay up.
What’s the current Qualtoo/Internickel exchange rate?
And, can you ™ a synonym?
I also have a patent on referring to next year as “twenty-dozen”. I invented that. If you want to use it, even in casual, IRL conversation, you will have to pay up.
My scooter blog is #1 at Google for “15 million dong.”
.
Heather MacspaceDonald appears to be the most unhappy person on earth.
Another indication that Shania law has yet to oppress me: the vodka I’m swilling as I cook.
Hey, PMax, I used a variant of your fried chicken concept, putting the bird pieces in an herbed buttermilk in sous vide for four hours before flouring and frying. Excellent!
Cool! On Android, comments have an alternating pink-grey & blue-grey background. Subtle, but noice!
.
It’s for boy comments and girl comments, JP.
And as I’ve noted many times, that LarryElvis is one handsome tom cat.
It’s for boy comments and girl comments, JP.
I must immediately try to prove this wrong, because.
Damn! Outwitted! Curses!
Shorter Steven Hayward:
Verbatim some guy in comments:
And as I’ve noted many times, that LarryElvis is one handsome tom cat.
I’m not sure you can call him a “tom,” as he has been, erm… modified.
.
DKW’s link at 3:28 makes a lot more sense of this amusing but cryptic image.
Thanks for a good half hour of laughing. Mr. Christoforo has fornicated the canine, for sure.
The poor guy must have thought he was working at a brokerage house or something.
Btw, LittlePig… your nym came up in discussion day before last when I met with Markansas for the first time. He and his fam were up here visiting his brother. How ya been?
.
And speaking of cats, I have charge of the neighbor’s three femkittehs, this week. This morning, we played chase the red dot.
That’s her place, btw… mine isn’t nearly so nice, neat, new and/or orderly.
.
Pat Buchanan and Ron Paul are also leftists, so anti-Semitism is an exclusive domain of the Left.
Good God. The Overton Window over at Powerline must be showing relativistic effects by now. Paleocons are now leftists? That’s nuts….
And as I’m writing this it hit me – this poor sumbitch believes what he read in Liberal Fascism. It’s Pantloadism.
How ya been?
I’ve had a bout of pneumonia, my bedridden stepmom is about to enter the hospice, and I got suspended from work for two days for showing my ass.
Other than that, pretty darn good!
The same guy says that Hitler and Mussolini were socialists also, so I’d say he’s definitely influenced by Loadberg.
That story has provided a wealth of LULZ the last day or two.
“We have to move forward and take care of Avenger’s customers,” Chiullan said. “I can’t worry about the fact that there isn’t a bus big enough for me to throw Paul Christoforo under. The Internet did that for me. I think they set him on fire too. I just hope that people will have the common decency to leave his wife and child out of all this. They didn’t send those emails, Paul did.” – Moises Chiullan, the PR guy for N-Control.
Seriously though, other than the stepmom drama (my last remaining ‘relative’ older than myself) things are looking up. I let myself get exhausted and now have been forced to take it easy. I continually need to learn to get over myself.
Awesome Christmas helped. Got to drink actual illegal moonshine on Christmas Eve, and my son made me a CD with the original versions of Carl Stalling standards (California, Here I Come; 42nd Street; Me-ow aka You Can Hear Their Song The Whole Night Long; I’m Forever Blowing Bubbles, etc. etc.). Best Christmas present I have ever received.
Speaking of cats, mine got a little too feisty while we were playing today and decided to play “shred the hand”.
Xmas present for Spearhafoc.
If saying mean & nasty things about Israel makes you anti-Semitic, then there are a serious MEGAfuckton of anti-Semitic Jews in teh wacky world of 2011.
Surely their status as resident Israelis is central to Hayward’s point.
[ Supplemental: Krugman does not need to “argue” that the stimulus was too small by half & then some. The crater of real capital destruction spawned in 2008 was of a distinct scale, & the amount thrown (not unlike a sacrificial virgin) into that crater was vastly inadequate to replace it or to repair its damage. There is no deep or subtle philosophical – or even political – nuance to this historical event. You swiped a 40 of Daddy’s prime hooch, tried to substitiute a mickey & hoped you could fluke one out … & got nailed for it. IT IS FUCKING GRADE ONE MATH, albeit with nauseatingly titanic numerals. Be it ever so hyper-Darwinian & inhumane, one may indeed argue that no stimulus whatsoever should have occurred. Arguing over the self-evident reason for its shortfall, however, is the pastime of gibbering yuts. So … it’s a perfect fit for powerlineblog.com! ]
That story has provided a wealth of LULZ the last day or two.
It’s all that Wil Wheaton has talked about for a week. I dunno why I care what Wesley Crusher has to say, but for some reason, he’s in my Tweetfeed and G+.
.
WTF is up with these crappy third generation pony names?
Feelin’ ya there … whatever happened to Doom Behemoth? Leviathan Mark 9? Entropymonger N-77? Bloodbreath? Earthscorcher?
Nobody ever kicks it boldschool any more.
Nobody ever kicks it boldschool any more
Oh, I don’t know about that.
It’s all that Wil Wheaton has talked about for a week. I dunno why I care what Wesley Crusher has to say, but for some reason, he’s in my Tweetfeed and G+.
Wil is a genuinely nice guy. He took my teasing of his not seducing Ashley Judd in good spirit.
From the Swampland link
Paultards, Katy, Paultards. Get it right.
Whoops, Swampland link was from Wonkette.
I better stop posting so much; somebody will think I’m Actor or something.
OT: KMHD, a member supported jazz station run by Oregon Public Broadcasting, is doing a “top 100 jazz songs” countdown. They’re up to about #64 at the moment, the best is yet to come.
http://www.kmhd.org/player/
Whingnut “logic”:
Krugman
saysshows that Keynes was right.Whingnut notes Keynes was an anti-Semite.
Ergo Krugman knows nothing about economics.
They’re all Dunning-Kruger poster children.
Well Pup, I gotta admit I never heard of Mongo Santamaria, but it’s good stuff.
gatese.
I better stop posting so much; somebody will think I’m Actor or something.
I’m pleased to be your standard of excellence, pig.
Without caulk, what would we use as cupcake icing on April 1?
Mortar. Plaster. Spackle. It’s not hard
I’m pleased to be your standard of excellence, pig.
😉 I can only aspire….
😉 I can only aspire….
Many are called, few are chosen.
Others have it thrust upon them.
Aawwwwwkwaaarrrrrd.
“Gatese”
OMFG, that’s too funneh
Also ignoring the fact that male-types aren’t totally averse to sexy stuff, as evidenced by half of the couple and most porn.
tell me more
Shania law
Shania can lay down the law on me anytime.
Well, when a daddy fish loves a mommy fish… fish porn
Watch out for fish if he starts chasing you while vibrating and displaying his tail.
I would probably watch out for anyone who vibrated and had a tail.
Or even, say, just one testicle
Ich sehe, was Du da getan hast.
In the country of the
Unixeunuch, the one-nutted man is king.King!
Mortar. Plaster. Spackle. It’s not hard
Yer doin’ it wrong
the Hoppin’ John and collards that I’m preparing for NYE.
Ooooo. Just about the only thing I miss about Richmond VA.
Where you said you livin’, boy?
Coastal GA buddy. Macintosh county, 4th gen shrimpers and I’ll tell you what they give a good party. They’re doing the oysters and shrimp, I’m doing the hoppin’ John and collards and desserts. It’s always a good time c’mon by.
Spackle
Years ago I had an English girlfriend literally laugh so hard she couldn’t catch her breath and develop a hiccup that threatened to knock her teeth loose when she found out that Americans call “spackle” what she called “pollyfilla”. Go figure.
I’m tellin’ you what this is a great party. Last year somebody made croquettes of wild duck mixed with wild hog, spiced, wrapped in duck flesh and deep fried. With a creamy dill dip. Plus, also, too, it’s beautiful there. I’ll make a really good hoppin’ John for that.
Of course the bushels of wild GA oysters may have me biased.
Don’t tell her about our EL-A-VA-TORS.
I was just down in GA. Would rather have been at this event.
Goddamn. Guess I’ll have to make do w/ the KC BBQ & some turkey. Shuck a few for me, heah?
Shuck a few
P.S. I know what you’re thinking. Shame on you. ALL of you.
I’m making burgers tonight…with caramelized onions, BBQ sauce and cheddar cheese. And oven-roasted freedom friez.
If you’re ever invited to Mac Donald’s house you might want to not use her bathroom & just wait until you can get back home
That’s what Ron Paul did.
Years ago I had an English girlfriend literally laugh so hard she couldn’t catch her breath and develop a hiccup that threatened to knock her teeth loose
Those Brits aren’t known for their dental health…
Good God. The Overton Window over at Powerline must be showing relativistic effects by now.
Maybe I’m overly optimistic, but I assumed that comment was from a particularly poker-faced troll.
Those Brits aren’t known for their dental health
Or their cooking.
I have a reason to be personally annoyed by Heather MacDonald: She was one of only two people from my prep school graduating class to gain even a small measure of fame. (The other was Dana Delaney.)
And no, I didn’t know her, although I think I might have shared a pot pipe with her once.
Iowa Republican on PBS news hour: “this country needs a 360 degree change in direction”
/facepalm
That’s pretty hilarious, Major Kong. Thank you for the laugh. My nightcap was missing something.
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha HA hA AAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA!
New Post!
Green cheese robot!
I am DEEPLY HURT that Cerberus has missed the opportunity to illustrate this post with the best Alice movie evah.
Feck. Wrong thread.
And no, I didn’t know her, although
It must have been some bad shit, but it explains a lot of commonalities.
Those Brits aren’t known for their dental health…
A stiff breeze causes a backlog at the periodontist.
If anyone belongs in an institution, it would be this creature (for lack of a better term) that is posing as an journalist.