Douthbaggery
Annotated Somewhat Shorter Msgr. Ross Xavier Pius Douthat, S.J., O.P., O.F.M., S.S.J., Th.D+, The New York Fucking Times Pope-Ed Page
The Unborn Paradox
- Characters in films like Juno and even in libertine1 TV shows like Mad Men2 rarely go through with abortions. This is not because Hollywood opposes abortion. Rather it is a devious liberal plot by Hollywood to mask the billions of abortions that occur every year in the United States. The purpose of this plot is to make sure that there are no babies to be adopted by women rendered permanently infertile by the birth control pill.3 Did you know that even blastocytes have heartbeats? Here’s a poem from The New Yorker4 that proves it.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
1Ross actually uses the word “libertine,” a word not used since 1957, when it was uttered by a fictional character, Professor Harold Hill, in the musical “The Music Man.” Even then, the word was used in a way to suggest that it was a ridiculous and antiquated epithet, like “Jezebel” or “scarlet woman.” Douthat’s copy editor, upon encountering this word in Douthat’s column, tried to impale her right palm with a letter opener. She later requested, and was granted, a three-month leave of absence to be followed by reassignment to the paper’s Staten Island desk.
2Ross seems unaware that “Mad Men” takes place in the 1960s when abortion was illegal in most states.
3Always. Trust. The. Shorter.™
4Here is a poem, also from The New Yorker, which proves that Sasquatch is real.
First one in! Do I get a medal?
Sadly no.
Douthat’s copy editor, upon encountering this word in Douthat’s column, tried to impale her right palm with a letter opener.
This triggered stigmata envy on Doughhead’s part.
TBogg’s shorter of Douthbaggery:
“Poor uneducated pregnant women should waste not so that upper middle-class women will want not.”
Linky:
http://tbogg.firedoglake.com/2011/01/03/you-gonna-eat-those-fries/
At long last, I’m here early enough in the thread to put up a Game to play (whenever Rending-the-Victim-to-Hamburger has run its proper course). I’ve been so eager to do this, I didn’t even get out the boat today.
So here is Snidely’s first SADLYNAUT GAME !
The game is to list the places you’ve lived, in chronological order, using whatever geographical reference seems best to you (e.g., NYC boroughs).
Mine uses sixth-month’s continuous residence as the minimum-time threshold.
Legend: * …high school +…college. I’m a boomer with a convoluted history:
[Honolulu HI] (8 months as a fetus. VS: Does this count?)
North Chicago IL … Arlington VA … New London CT … Inyokern CA … Zionsville IN … Muncie IN … Indianapolis IN … Almira NY … Plainfield* IN … Lawrence* KS … Iowa City+ IA … Independence KS … Augsburg, Germany … Independence KS … Amherst+ MA … Coffeyville KS … Fairfax+ VA … Baltimore MD
I thought about using superenciphered postal zip codes instead of placenames. But that sorta defeats the whole game and renders it completely stupid, instead of merely silly.
Have fun. (Now I’m going to gingerly out of the boat.)
Enh! I can’t believe there’s a new thread right as we started talkin’ Wegmans in the last thread. *pout, sulk*
Oh well, anti-choice fucks are always fun too.
Prior to 1973, 20 percent of births to white, unmarried women (and 9 percent of unwed births over all) led to an adoption. Today, just 1 percent of babies born to unwed mothers are adopted, and would-be adoptive parents face a waiting list that has lengthened beyond reason.
You left out tragic decline in white babies.
Blastocytes ISRAEL.
Rather it is a devious liberal plot by Hollywood to mask the billions of abortions that occur every year in the United States.
Could also be a way to show that women are not in fact stupid irrational beings who if left to their own devices will unfailingly abort their own babies.
Would would be really controversial would be to make a pregnancy-centric movie in which the woman ends up, in fact, choosing abortion – you know, exploring why some women make that choice and all that good stuff. Has this ever been done?
Ross actually uses the word “libertine,” a word not used since 1957
Gandalf used it in the 1995 film version of “Cold Comfort Farm.” I also use it all the time, but, you know, GANDALF.
NOPE. (Actually, I’m pretty there have been…but they’re EXCEEDINGLY rare. Even on soaps, abortion is treated as something fairly radioactive.) Having a child is, almost without fail, seen as the good, moral choice. Women who abortions are selfish, slutty, lazy hedonists, dontcha know?
Have
Pffft, Saint Doghhats screeds are easy to summarize.
IT’S THE WOMANS FAULT!!!!!!!! 111
This is the paradox of America’s unborn. No life is so desperately sought after, so hungrily desired, so carefully nurtured
Where else would Dick Cheney get his organs?
Here’s a poem from The New Yorker that proves it.
Oh, sweet baby Jesus. If there was ever a reason to Trust the Shorter, I think this may be it…
Thank you for this. A laugh is always needed when dealing with anti-choicers. *breaths deeply*
“Women who abortions are selfish, slutty, lazy hedonists, dontcha know?”
You know, there’s a pretty good word for that: Libertine.
This is the paradox of America’s unborn. No life is so desperately sought after, so hungrily desired, so carefully nurtured
And yet it’s STILL nobody else’s fucking business.
Libertine
Pretty good, in a nose-falling-off kind of way.
“First one in! Do I get a medal?”
If actor was here, he would give you a Laurel and Hardy handshake.
Quite a band getting started here. St. Penis of the Doghat on the misogyny and Timmuh Grahamcracker on the homophobe.
I like the word “Libertine.” Just onomatopoeiacally if for no other reason.
Pretty good, in a nose-falling-off kind of way.
Veiled Tycho Brahe reference?
Depp doesnt have kohled eyes. Not worth seeing, I reckon. He only looks hot with kohled eyes.
Of course, actor may be here. If so, he would be a long-time commenter, first-time lurker.
I think what Ross is really saying is that dusky colored women should be sterilized and teh white ones be forced to carry any pregnancy to term so that rich but infertile families can have their choice of shiny bebes to play doll house with. This would take away money from the dirty abortion industry and hand it over to the pristine adoption industry, where the Catholics can make money.
What could possibly go wrong with this scheme?
You know, there’s a pretty good word for that: Libertine.
Also Scarlet Women. And ragtime is responsible. Damn you, Scott Joplin!
hand it over to the pristine adoption industry, where the Catholics can make money.
Ding ding! Last I’d heard for a sparkle white baby the minimum bid starts around 20K and rises rapidly after that.
But it’s all about their souls of course.
Whale nails it.
He unwittingly makes a bloody good point.
There’s two points to be made; One, if there was a bit more “admonition to use a condom” and a bit less “abstinence makes the heart grow fonder,” plenty of pregnancies wouldn’t even occur in the first place. Two, for a lot of women, a ban on abortion will mean immediate poverty unless the state helps them raise it.
It’s insane; they want to ban abortion while at the same time making pregnancy as likely as possible and its consequences as harsh as possible. Yep… sounds like a teabagger alright.
The first footnote implies that The Pasty Little Putz has a copy editor. I call shenanegans. Unpossible.
I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter. I should have trusted the shorter.
Women who have abortions are putting unfair restrictions on the supply of adoptable babies. Thereby artificially raising their value. If abortions were illegal, then there would be a much larger supply and adoptive parents would have a better selection at cheaper prices. So what if that means there are more babies left sitting on the shelf to rot, that’s the FREE MARKET baby!
VS, you should know better. If you ate any of those rotted mangoes I’d suggest syrup of ipecac, and at the very least you’ll need brain bleach and a cool cloth on your forehead.
I got nothin’ on-topic. Brain freeze. (Do zombies like frozen organs? Do they wait for them to thaw out?)
I’ve gotta run some errands and stuff. Have fun.
Marion, I get off the boat with surprising regularity. Apparently, I’m not a quick learner.
young people our culture sets adrift
I caught this as well Chris. Now it’s “our” culture to blame. I sure abstinence only federally funded classes, cuts to sex education, demonization of abortion/contraceptive providers, shaming and browbeating of confused, scared, broke young women into beleiving it’s all their fault, no persecuting of the so called father, no after childbirth support of the mother, had anything to do with “our culture.”
Like I said, it’s always the womans fault.
Ding ding! Last I’d heard for a sparkle white baby the minimum bid starts around 20K and rises rapidly after that.
is that on eBaby?
Not getting out of the boat, nope, no fucking way. My motto: just don’t Douthat.
eBaby
I larfed. Oh, yes, I surely did.
Of course, actor may be here
He’s not. 39 comments and not a peep from him? The silence *almost* leads me to worry about his well being.
This is sort of comment that makes me rub my boobs on your face. OK. Maybe not. But, damn, that’s funneh.
Do zombies like frozen organs?
brainsicles are a wonderful summer treat.
Prior to 1973, 20 percent of births to white, unmarried women (and 9 percent of unwed births over all) led to an adoption. Today, just 1 percent of babies born to unwed mothers are adopted, and would-be adoptive parents face a waiting list that has lengthened beyond reason.
Um, I did not get out of the boat, but took this snippet from a Malaclypse post. I’m a bit confused. If 20 percent of births were adopted prior to 73 and only 1 percent are being adopted now… how is that an argument for making more unwanted babies? I’m sure it’s central to his point though.
This is sort of comment that makes me rub my boobs on your face
judging from your photographs, I’d suffocate.
The highlighted part’s the biggest hypocrisy, to me. Yes, sure, it’s the state’s duty to tell women they have to have the baby, but somehow, it’s not the state’s duty to help the woman (and her baby) survive the situation that the state has forced her into.
Being a single mother’s no bed of roses now, but imagine where we’d be in a GOPer utopia where 1) it’s not a choice and 2) even the limited help they have now’s been shut down.
Oh yes, and let’s get rid of Social Security and Medicare too, so that in addition to providing for her kid, the single mother will also have to help provide for her parents.
Pup, in case you didn’t see this in the last thread: You want to hear something hilarious/pathetic? When my inlaws came to visit, the FIRST place I took them was…Wegmans. And you know what? They fucking loved it. I also took and my dad and stepmom there and we went nucking futz at the olive bar ‘n’ stuff. There’s a reason I call it The Best Place on Earth ™.
I’m sorry, all. I’m just excited to have a Wegmans fan club buddy.
The Unborn Paradox … bastard spawn of The Unchained Melody?
You know who else considered white women as brood-mares?
Did you know even spermatozoa have heartbeats? Here’s a 20 kilogram ball of toejam & ear-wax that I’ve meticulously collected for years to prove it.
whoah. I just got a HUGE feeling of deja vs….
I’m SORRY! I find my obsession with a grocery store disturbing, too.
Definitive proof of the prescience of John Lennon:
I got something to say that might cause you pain
If I catch you talking to that boy again
I’m gonna let you down
And leave you flat
Because I told you before, oh
You can’t Douthat
Well, it’s the second time I’ve caught you talking to him
Do I have to tell you one more time, I think it’s a sin
I think I’ll let you down (Let you down)
Leave you flat (Gonna let you down and leave you flat)
Because I’ve told you before, oh
You can’t Douthat
Everybody’s green
Cos I’m the one who won your love
But if they’d seen
You’re talking that way they’d laugh in my face
So please listen to me, if you wanna stay mine
I can’t help my feelings, I’ll go out of my mind
I’m gonna let you down (Let you down)
And leave you flat (Gonna let you down and leave you flat)
Because I’ve told you before, oh
You can’t Douthat, oh
(You can’t Douthat
You can’t Douthat
You can’t Douthat
You can’t Douthat
You can’t Douthat)
Everybody’s green
Cos I’m the one who won your love
But if they’d seen
You’re talking that way they’d laugh in my face
So please listen to me, if you wanna stay mine
I can’t help my feelings, I’ll go out of my mind
I’m gonna let you down (Let you down)
And leave you flat (Gonna let you down and leave you flat)
Because I’ve told you before, oh
You can’t Douthat
Also, a little historical note, my great grandfather was the captain of a lebertine durring the War of 1812. The USS Casanova.
whoah. I just got a HUGE feeling of deja vs
Somehow this wants me to comment about going blind all over again.
Wut is Wegmans?
I don’t know Wegmans.
Alas, in sooth. What I would give for another shot at that slightly chunkier Reese Witherspoon .
Wut is Wegmans? The Best Place on Earth ™
I find my obsession with a grocery store disturbing, too.
perhaps you some kind of organism growing inside you, demanding sustenance.
Bartender, two Libertinis, easy on the olives.
You know, I think, just possibly, you may be on to something there…
“Libertine” is the new “libtard”
Ooh! *claps delightedly* What. Would be. In a Libertini?
Based on the shorter, which I am trusting, alternate shorter douchehat:
Margaret Atwood’s book The Handmaid’s Tale contains many great ideas that we should implement right away.
Hey Sigouney Weaver, vegitibalarian only or doest thou eateth of animal flesh as well?
Ooh! *claps delightedly* What. Would be. In a Libertini?
Liberals.
DARK. But oh so funneh.
when it was uttered by a fictional character, Professor Harold Hill, in the musical “The Music Man..
He’s still obsessing over Robert Preston in that bizarre Catholic totes heterosexual way.
PS – preview really IS my friend! Thank you preview!
Mmmmm, liberals taste good! Like stuff like gin and orange peel. Not like conservatives, who taste like POOP.
Not like conservatives, who taste like POOP.
apparently our dog likes to eat conservatives.
I actually laughed out loud.
LOL Israel!
Y’know, Douchehat, maybe there would be more depictions of abortion in Hollywood if amoral*assholes like you didn’t raise a hue and cry every time anything that vaguely hurts your fee fees is depicted. (Would Fast Times at Ridgemont High exist today, at least in its original form? I think not).
*Anybody who defends a criminal syndicate’s cover-up of ongoing rape and sexual molestation and prizes the life of a blob of cells over the happiness, health, and welfare of women (and their LIVING children) is an amoral fucker. Being a Catholic just gives cover to his sociopathy.
(Actually, I would argue that religious hierarchies and the outsourcing of morality actually *makes* people into sociopaths by absolving them of responsibility for their actions, but that’s another discussion to be had elsewhere).
He only looks hot with kohled eyes.
So, you’re saying he runs hot and kohled.
*Anybody who defends a criminal syndicate’s cover-up of ongoing rape and sexual molestation and prizes the life of a blob of cells over the happiness, health, and welfare of women (and their LIVING children) is an amoral fucker. Being a Catholic just gives cover to his sociopathy
Thank you for this T&U.
No, I’d say it’s quite true. Not universally true, e.g. not every religious hierarchy or every member of such hierarchies is guilty of it; I speculate most of them are decent people just like in most jobs. But religion can give a cover to sociopathy that most regular jobs can’t provide.
I read an argument against secular humanism once that went “secular humanism can’t be effectively moral, because it doesn’t hold people accountable to a higher power.” Well, maybe that’s true. But on the flip side, religion, especially religious fundamentalism, can absolve people of any accountability by allowing them to hide all their actions behind “God told me to do it.”
Careful there T&U – you don’t want to get me started, do you? It gets ugly every time.
“secular humanism can’t be effectively moral, because it doesn’t hold people accountable to a higher power.
It can be effectively moral, because it holds people accountable to other people.
judging from your photographs, I’d suffocate.
LIAR. You are not a breather and cannot suffocate. You’re just afraid of VS’ bewbies.
I always tell myself I don’t care for puns…and then I read stuff like this and it makes me reconsider.
But on the flip side, religion, especially religious fundamentalism, can absolve people of any accountability by allowing them to hide all their actions behind “God told me to do it.”
Exactly. And there’s a difference between “Look at Jesus, he was this awesome dude and we want to follow his example,” and “I’m better than you NYAH NYAH NYAH!”
Careful there T&U – you don’t want to get me started, do you? It gets ugly every time.
But amusing…
judging from your photographs, I’d suffocate.
HE’S A BREATHER!!!
Wut is Wegmans?
I don’t know Wegmans.
Guy who dresses up Weimaraners, I think.
LIAR. You are not a breather and cannot suffocate.
Who reads ALL the comments here? Get a LIFE, Whale Chowder.
Oh, snap.
OTOH, being held accountable by fairies and hobbits might have its advantages.
WHALE CHOWDER YOU BASTID.
Some day we’ll recount the day the Great Zombie Scandal occurred, and zrm was outed as a breather. People will tell tales of what they were doing when the news broke.
I’m confused about something. Is it just not breathing that makes a zombie, or does heartbeat count too? In the latter case Dick Cheney would qualify as a zombie, but I’m sure that ZRM’s clan don’t want anything to do with him. What phylum of the undead does Cheney belong in?
But religion can give a cover to sociopathy that most regular jobs can’t provide.
Where it can get really sociopathic is when you have a state religion. Then you can have an entire country and society do things in the name of religion that is really for the good of the state. Quite violent and sadistic things.
Dear BBB,
XO times infinity.
Sincerely,
Arky
People will tell tales of what they were doing when the news broke.
Many will say they were out “gibbing” zombies with him.
What phylum of the undead does Cheney belong in?
I don’t know the answer to that. But I do know that in order to be a zombie you have to have actually been human at one time.
Aw, shucks, Arky, you’re giving me an ego.
Wasn’t Johnny Rotten Mcdonald in a band?
History is full of little hints that the being held accountable to a higher power thing doesn’t work too well.
(Unless your idea of effectively moral includes lots o’ slaughter and related activities.)
What phylum of the undead does Cheney belong in?
Any D&D geek can tell you he’s a lich.
Snidely Whiplash said,
January 3, 2011 at 20:11
You’ve spent some time in my necka the woods!
Vis a vis happy abortions in movies.
Not a movie but the book ‘Gospel’ by Wilton Barnhardt
The heroine (spoiler here) has the abortion – and then goes to work with
a religious charity in Ethiopia.
The English sure are lucky. They’ve got boobies to police their streets.
What phylum of the undead does Cheney belong in?
mechanically re-animated. Frankenstein’s monster, Borg, and such as.
I read an argument against secular humanism once that went “secular humanism can’t be effectively moral, because it doesn’t hold people accountable to a higher power.”
Nothing says “we’re the moral ones” like requiring an external, omniscient sadistic punisher to behave decently.
Snidely Whiplash said,
January 3, 2011 at 20:11
+…college
Iowa City+ IA
Amherst+ MA
Fairfax+ VA
Wow, you got tossed outta almost as many colleges as Sarah Palin!
They’ve got boobies to police their streets.
Judging from Woody Allen movies, that’s problematic.
requiring an external, omniscient sadistic punisher
Hawt. Can I say? HAWT.
They’ve got boobies to police their streets.
Aka “peelers” after Emma Peel.
“But religion can give a cover to sociopathy that most regular jobs can’t provide.”
I think we need more Buddhist sociopaths in the popular media.
But then I think – maybe all the generals in Burma are Buddhists.
FYWP, I am NOT posting too fast. Fucker.
ANYWAY, Erk endorses Pence for president.
One of the comments states that Pence is electable because he’s to the right of Palin. Sweet Jesus.
like requiring an external, omniscient sadistic punisher to behave decently.
Maybe I should get the religion after all. What I have to pay to my EOSP for my twice weekly”I’ve been naughty” sessions is getting quite expensive. I wonder if latex is cheaper than leather?
“ANYWAY, Erk endorses Pence for president.
One of the comments states that Pence is electable because he’s to the right of Palin. Sweet Jesus.”
I’m guessing thAt Erk’s Jesus is Mean Jesus.
Everyone’s forgetting about Maude. Maude had a surprise late-in-life pregnancy and went back and forth about it, and her husband said he’d support whatever she wanted to do, and she decided that their new-baby days were behind them, and she had the abortion.
Unless I dreamed that.
Anyway, perhaps we can produce more babies of less color and decrease unemployment, too. Do you think there would be a market for snowflake blastocysts implanted into the uteri of darker women, if the resulting wee babes turned out to be whiter than white and April-fresh, too?
Michael Baroney & Cheese:
Reminder that this man gets “awards” from prestigious Wingnut Welfare Institutes consisting of six figures checks for writing this bilge.
Meh, more here.
Aka “peelers” after Emma Peel.
Hell, yeah!
Yeah, but Lark don’t you think it’s telling that we had more balanced compassionate portrayals of abortions DECADES ago?
Re: the Barone piece, I think my favorite part (besides the Saks and Neiman Marcus part [motherfucker, I’ve never even stepped foot into either of those stores and I’m strongly middle class]) is this: “Stores like Walmart, Target and Kohl’s sell good quality clothes at astonishingly low prices; you can outfit a kid in school clothes for $100 or so a year.”
I suppose if a child stays the same size all year and you consider “school clothes” 5 shirts and five pairs of pants, then yes, yes you can. That’s also assuming that cheap-ass clothes can stand up to weekly washings and wearings. Oh, and that your kid doesn’t play sports or get ketchup on his shirt.
Do you think there would be a market for snowflake blastocysts implanted into the uteri of darker women, if the resulting wee babes turned out to be whiter than white and April-fresh, too?
I’m sure that there must be some sort of cootie problem with this scheme, otherwise don’t you think it would have been cries that it be made mandatory already?
I’d make a comment speculating why Barone wants poor kids to go without underwear, but that would be in bad taste.
When has the potential for bad taste ever stopped anyone here from making a comment about anything???
Pretty good, in a nose-falling-off kind of way.
Veiled Tycho Brahe reference?
Brahe was more concerned with Sirius than syphilis.
When has the potential for bad taste ever stopped anyone here from making a comment about anything???
Potential?
ShirleyMarion, you jest.Gr. ANGRY.
“Or consider something as prosaic as food. The supermarkets of the 1960s and 1970s didn’t come close to matching the amazing selection of produce, meats and exotic foods as you find in supermarkets today — and not just in high-income neighborhoods but in modest-income places all over the country.”
What the fuck does that have to do with people being able to afford (healthful, good quality) food, asshole???
BTW, Americans are actually spending a smaller percentage of their incomes on food than any time in history, but we’re paying more for necessities (housing, food) and we’re making up for it in increased health care costs. But people in modest-income neighborhoods have access to shiitakes and salmon, so it’s all good.
Tycho Brahe,
The astronomer they all say
Gave Kepler the data one requires
To fix the position of the stars.
I’d make a comment speculating why Barone wants poor kids to go without underwear, but that would be in bad taste.
Well, they HAVE to go without SOMETHING. They are, after all, poor, and must be punished for such lousy decision making.
What the fuck does that have to do with people being able to afford (healthful, good quality) food, asshole???
Poor people are eating lower-quality food than they have since the muckraker days, now that we, as a nation, have decided that food quality should be jerked off by the invisible hand of capitalism. Compare prices in Whole Foods versus the average shit sold in plastic wrap.
otherwise don’t you think it would have been cries that it be made mandatory already?
That pesky 13th Amendment keeps getting in the way. They’re working on it.
“Or consider something as prosaic as food.
And Of course, one of the big issues abetting obesity is the lack of diversity and healthy choices for food in poor neighborhoods.
But again, the poor must be punished for the wealthy to feel GOOD about their wealth.
The funniest movie about abortion ever is “Citizen Ruth.” Will Ruth choose to have an abortion? Rent it, I won’t spoil the ending.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0115906/
Storyline
“Ruth Stoops is a poor indigent drug-user (a huffer – inhaling glue and paint for a high) whose down and out existence is complicated once more by becoming pregnant (she has had and lost four children already). When a judge orders that she gets an abortion or face a felony charge, she is befriended by Gail Stoney, a pro-lifer whose husband is president of the local “Babysavers” group. Suddenly Ruth is thrust into the middle of the pro-choice/pro-life struggle, with each side wanting her to take their side as a “message” to others – and the situation escalates…”
“Yeah, but Lark don’t you think it’s telling that we had more balanced compassionate portrayals of abortions DECADES ago?” vs, yes, telling and disturbing. One of my favorite movies as a youngster was Love with the Proper Stranger, starring Natalie Wood and Steve McQueen. She almost goes through with the illegal abortion, because she’s that desperate. So even though she doesn’t terminate her pregnancy, and there’s a Hollywood ending, the story doesn’t make it into a mythical Madonna shtick, with Natalie having some special knowledge of grace or whatever. The site is dirty, the provider is sketchy, and there’s the obvious possibility that Natalie could die. It’s gritty, realistic, and funny.
“I’m sure that there must be some sort of cootie problem with this scheme….” Marion, I think the cootie problem would come down to logistics: they’d feel like they’d have to intern the pregnant women (maybe call it protective custody), because otherwise the women would surely go out and smoke crack and spoil the fetus. We’re not quite at the point of codifying the treatment of fertile women as livestock. Besides, you’d have to feed and house them, and that’s gonna cost actual money.
Seen it. Payne was pretty rough on the pro-choice side. Perhaps not quite as rough as as the anti-choice side, but rough enough to make me uncomfortable.
Does he honestly believe that wealthy women who want to adopt and wealthy women who take birth control are the same set of women? It’s like, oh here I am “effectively sterilizing” myself by taking the pill, and it’s a crying shame because I really want a baby. But say, look at all those destitute women selfishly having abortions. I want THOSE babies! Why it’s so simple!
If Ross wants women to make different choices, he might work to expand the options available to them. Women should not be forced to chose between having children and feeding them, or between a career and a family. Yet our country does not pay living wages to the working class, while our male-centric workplaces treat pregnancy like a prison stint. As soon as he fixes that, he can mind his own fucking business.
“the story doesn’t make it into a mythical Madonna shtick”
Well, if there’s no half-naked writhing in a cathedral, I’ll pass.
Another is that inflation indexes can’t fully account for product improvement and technological progress. I bought my first electronic calculator in 1970 for $110. Today you can buy the same gadget for $1.99 at your local drug store.
Of course, anyone wanting to honestly compare life in America across the years would also need to point out that the $110 one was made in an American factory by a union worker with a decent salary and a pension, so it’s not really a clean sweep for the “wow, I can get a piece of plastic crap for 2$ nowadays, ain’t life grand” boosters.
True vs, but I think that’s because he chose to take a nuetral stance for satirical purposes. Still funny as hell. Otherwise, what did you think of the movie?
Yeah, I think he was trying to be fair…and harsh. Because his films are always harsh and unblinking and revel in the ugliness that is human nature. He’s, like, one step above Todd Solondz in that way. But, yeah, very very funny in a very very dark way.
We have shitty health care and shitty education which directly affects the level of living of thousands of people. But hey, as long as those people can buy fifteen different varieties of beef at their local supermarket, we’re a first world nation.
Kind of like the argument that even though our national security apparatus’ powers keep growing and its supervision keep shrinking, as long as we have guns, we need fear nothing. Symbol over substance; give people shiny goodies and they’ll be distracted, or at least that’s the logic.
This past holiday shopping season has been dizzying. The television ads seem to exist in a parallel universe, where everybody keeps having more and more money to buy cars that talk and park themselves, and electronics so sophisticated that you can watch the same movie or game from your living room to the street to the subway and back home again without missing a frame. It’s so shrill. I think they should just sell me the narcotics directly and skip all of this mid-level consumer-induced “shop till you drop, because then you won’t come and kill us” charade.
But then I think – maybe all the generals in Burma are Buddhists.
They aren’t according to thousands of monks. Theravada Buddhism places few obligations on laypeople, but one is to provide alms to mendicant monks. By upturning their bowls, the monks signified that the generals and their families were not even worthy of giving charity, and were effectively excommunicated.
This is the paradox of America’s unborn. No life is so desperately sought after, so hungrily desired, so carefully nurtured.
It’s not a paradox. It’s just too damn bad. The fact that nice middle-class white women want what bad, lower-class white/brown/black women don’t, but have, is no reason, excuse, or justification for making the latter go through nine months of HUMAN FUCKING PREGNANCY when they don’t want to. Let alone the emotional kick in the head that comes from giving up a baby, or so I assume it to be.
Unless Ross wants to make this a matter for the market, and routinize the growing of babies for purchase–which would convert a thorny moral problem into a nice, quantifiable market problem. Is that what he wants?
Ans: No, because even that would empower the bad lower-class mother with the ability to decline the transaction. Can’t somebody force these sluts to attend to the happiness of women like Ross’s mom? After all, that’s the Catholic thing to do, isn’t it?
Sicnce there’s a new thread up I won’t feel bad about dropping this here. It’s almost sort of on the the new topic. If you squint.
http://madmikesamerica.com/2011/01/crazy-christians-say-world-will-end-again-on-may-21-2011/
I sent the group an email promising a $1000 donation now if they agree that on May 22 the world has not ended they will pay me $100,000.
They aren’t according to thousands of monks.
Argument ad NoTrueScotsmanum, thinks I.
Like the many Muslims who tell me Osama & co aren’t really Muslim and have hijacked the religion. Well, they kill in the name of Islam, so… For the purposes of discussions like this, I usually say that if you consider yourselve Buddhist (and I think the generals do), you are.
Question is, how many people actually kill in the name of Buddhism (as opposed to bad people who just happen to be Buddhist)? I can’t think of any right now, but I think even they’ve had their moments of violence in the past.
I sent the group an email promising a $1000 donation now if they agree that on May 22 the world has not ended they will pay me $100,000.
Outstanding!
All they gotta do is round up a hundred people, like you, though, and they’ll break even – make it a hundred and one or more, and they’ll turn a profit.
Unless Ross wants to make this a matter for the market, and routinize the growing of babies for purchase–which would convert a thorny moral problem into a nice, quantifiable market problem. Is that what he wants?
if ANYBODY ELSE steals my eBaby joke, I will send actor to show you his etchings.
if you consider yourselve Buddhist (and I think the generals do),
I would guess they are Buddhists the same way George Bush is a Christian.
The highlighted part’s the biggest hypocrisy, to me. Yes, sure, it’s the state’s duty to tell women they have to have the baby, but somehow, it’s not the state’s duty to help the woman (and her baby) survive the situation that the state has forced her into.
Conservatives care deeply about the lives of each and every tiny, precious child until the moment of their birth. After that…well, fuck ’em if they chose the wrong parents.
“if ANYBODY ELSE steals my eBaby joke, I will send actor to show you his etchings.
”
Don’t fret. I only rub my boobs on the faces of the undead. AND they have to be architects.
All they gotta do is round up a hundred people, like you, though, and they’ll break even – make it a hundred and one or more, and they’ll turn a profit.
With Mad Skillz like that, you could be selling CDOs on Wall Street!
Seriously, what? By my count, with 100 betters like P-Max, they wind up $10M in the hole on 22 May.
Seriously, what? By my count, with 100 betters like P-Max, they wind up $10M in the hole on 22 May.
Math was never, ever, my thing. But by my count…
Had I thought about that for a second, I would have realized that they’d have to pay back the $100,000 to every single person like you that sent them a thousand… the second variable is not fixed increases even as the first one does… and they do, indeed, end up in the hole.
Yeah. I was going to make sense, but then I got high…
the second variable is not fixed, it increases even as the first one does
Fixxed.
Everybody.
—
So, I don’t know from Wegman’s, but out this way the spot I try to get to now and again is the Berkeley Bowl. The produce section is insane. Alas, it’s on the other side of the bay, so I don’t get there nearly often enough. Whole Paycheck pales in comparison, and is way pricier.
Mmmmmmmmmmmm. Produce.
Well, what you describe was essentially AIG’s business plan. There was a chance you were making a clever allusion on the assumption they were going go take the money and run, but then they’d make a “profit” no matter how many suckers they attracted.
I’m a little stoned on codeine right now–I discovered today that whereas sinusitis sucks, the drugs they give you when you have it are righteous–so I wasn’t sure I got the joke.
The funniest movie about abortion ever is “Citizen Ruth.”
See also End of the Road (1970). Terry Southern script!!
justme, that looks like my kinda party.
I only rub my boobs on the faces of the undead. AND they have to be architects.
Initially read that as “artichokes”. Need moar coffee.
Well…artichoke architects are pretty hot, in your defense.
So, I don’t know from Wegman’s, but out this way the spot I try to get to now and again is the Berkeley Bowl.
I could never understand the appeal of Berkeley Bowl, despite living only a few blocks from it. Yes, there are many varieties of orange there, but the organic selection is very spotty. And everything else is badly organized and sort of meh. I much prefer Rainbow in the city.
I realize that this might sound like a kind of out there kooky theory, but I wonder if writers actually make choices about what happens in their script based on what they think makes for the most drama.
The free market mechanism of allowing women to make free and rational choices has not delivered the desired result in the area of adoption. Demand for nice white babies is outstripping supply. We cannot possibly accept this result as the consequence of the market finding the appropriate level, so government interference in the baby market is required to give us the desired state of affairs. What’s more, this interference should most certainly not take the form of an incentive to women to supply more babies. It can and should only take the form of brute coercion by the state.
Oh, and movie about abortion: If these walls could talk.
Game FAIL!
I thought it might unearth odd intersections of people’s lives: “No shit! You lived in Joliet? I used to go there every week to see Daddy when he was in prison!” Mainly I was curious about other people’s lives.
My excuse is being a noob; I’m still learning the Rules here. The inference is that any Game must grow organically and spontaneously from the Comments. The Vast Silence was a gentle way to teach the lesson. (Another very distinct possibility: It was a stoopid game.)
Still learning. I’ll never do that again.
Also, a little historical note, my great grandfather was the captain of a libertine during the War of 1812. The USS Casanova.
Mine charged up Don Juan Hill. (Also good name for a pr0n star.)
I learned awhile back not to take things like this too personally. Sometimes people respond to posts. Sometimes they don’t. It’s not meant as a slight.
Properly chastised, I’m retreating to watch The Wire on DVD. Going through it a second time for detail and texture, with Commentaries on.
Slayer: Thanx fer the balm…
Dear Snidely: you ain’t been chastised. It’s like what VS said. You are just fine. Now, if you want to be chastised, you have to ask for it. Then everyone will cheerfully pile on and chastise you beyond your wildest dreams.
PIE!
http://www.27bslash6.com/p2p2.html
And thanx to Larkspur, too. Beneath all the sly rips, there IS an underlying kindness here. One of the reasons I jumped in to S,N!
NOW, I’m off to The Wire I’ll check in again after a few episodes. Have fun!
No life is so desperately sought after, so hungrily desired, so carefully nurtured.
Yeah, well after it’s born, it’s sure not “carefully nurtured” by the fuckhead politicians you support, buddy.
I guess that’s when it’s “hungrily desired.”
Snidely, I liked your game, but I could not play. I’m a bit Garboesque about privacy on the ‘net sometimes.
Or maybe that’s Gabbo-esque.
GABBO!!!
Er, ah… I’m a bad wittle boy.
Well, the guy is a catholic.
If all kids were raised in a stable and supportive environment where their desperate mothers weren’t trapped in a cycle of grinding poverty and powerlessness, there would be no poor sad little children who were highly vulnerable to being preyed on by figures of authority, like, say, their local catholic priest.
It could be the beginning of the end for the catholic church. The kind of people who would normally consider joining the priesthood, would instead be turned off* and would choose alternative careers. And there can only be so many congressmen.
*yes, literally!
Since 1973, countless lives that might have been welcomed into families like Thernstrom’s — which looked into adoption, and gave it up as hopeless — have been cut short in utero instead.
and then there’s little girls like lisa steinberg who was adopted and had her life savagely cut short, so fuck you, ross
I guess that’s when it’s “hungrily desired.”
What are you so modestly proposing?
It took a little while for that to sink in. Fuck you, Douchehat.
1Ross actually uses the word “libertine,” a word not used since 1957, when it was uttered by a fictional character, Professor Harold Hill, in the musical “The Music Man.”
Libertine is a sweet treat, like tangerine (the musical instrument) and clemetine (a darling little fruit).
It’s not meant as a slight.
sometimes it is.
Based on the business model of his company, Halliburton, I believe he must be a vampire.
I was also thinking lich, but I don’t think he’s a magic-user so that would not be possible.
Mine charged up Don Juan Hill.
Funny, cuz, you know, the battle was San Juan Hill…
I like libertine in my milk.
What. Would be. In a Libertini?
1 shot .38 caliber hollowpoint
1 gram of something that is none of your damn business, but should be legal
Equal volume price gouged water
1.5 oz of John Galt’s shrug sweat
Shaken by the cold invisible hand of the free market
Target and Kohl’s sell good quality clothes at astonishingly low prices; you can outfit a kid in school clothes for $100 or so a year.”
And another kid in India gets beaten for not making quota, so win/win!
Am I the only one left here?
What. Would be. In a Libertini?
1 shot .38 caliber hollowpoint
1 gram of something that is none of your damn business, but should be legal
Equal volume price gouged water
1.5 oz of John Galt’s shrug sweat
Shaken by the cold invisible hand of the free market
OK, that was good.
Dick Cheney? Lich? I wouldn’t even spit on him!
I remember the depiction of abortion in Cabaret (dunno if it was in Goodbye to Berlin). Although she was the very definition of a libertine, I think most non-sociopathic people would agree by the end of the movie that raising a child in 3rd Reich, pre-WWII Germany with a very conflicted English gay father and a fabulous-but-clearly-not-maternal mother would be a bad idea. And would you give it up to the nice Jewish lady and her closet-Jew husband who had to flee the country (To Poland??)? Some proto-Nazi aryan family? Or some regular otherwise nice family in depression-era Berlin?
They actually considered it and speculated in terror at the prospect, but Sally decided to have the abortion. Everyone’s sigh of relief was audible, including my own.
Hey Snidely, we crossed paths in Lawrence. Cool town, very hip for Kansas. Also home to William Burroughs for a time. But Independence, KS, are you kidding me?
PS, Nell keeps wanting me to tie her up. You are truly evil.