Let Them Eat Shame
When we last visited with the well-fed and rosy-cheeked Julie Gunlock, she was in high dudgeon about the cuisine at a DC soup kitchen that was serving fancy-pants gourmet items to the homeless instead of graham crackers and gruel. If you give a homeless man a bowl of pumpkin soup, she whined, he’ll never break the vicious cycle of poverty, alcoholism, drug abuse and disease and instead will simply spend the rest of his life supping on puff pastry, arugula, balsamic vinegar, baby artichokes and other delicacies normally reserved for people who have their own homes.
In most cases a performance like that would be hard to top. Most decent people with even a modicum of shame know that it’s not really good form to argue that some people simply deserve crappy food because they are, well, less fortunate. Noblesse oblige, and all that, keeps all but the most lunatic of wingnuts from straying down the path of trying to yank shit off of a hungry person’s dinner plate.
Of course, veteran SadlyNauts know that the preceding paragraph is a dead giveaway that Julie Gunlock has indeed managed to sink even lower in her culinary Darwinism.
What, your are probably wondering, could be worse than complaining that the food doled out in soup kitchens is too hoity-toity? Think children. Think hungry children. Think hungry poor children Think school breakfasts and lunches that are sometimes the only meals that children eat that don’t come in a snack food bag from 7-11. And, yes, Julie Plumplock thinks that this free lunch for 8-year-old freeloaders should be stopped so that their impoverished parents can whip up in their tiny kitchens some nutritional lunches for their kids to carry to school to eat instead of the government-subsidized food in the cafeteria.
Feeding a child is one of the most basic parental responsibilities, yet first lady Michelle Obama wishes to liberate parents from this fundamental role by urging them to rely on the public schools to feed their children.
Julie thinks, apparently, that if inner-city and rural mothers are liberated from the tyranny of the statist school cafeteria, they will be able to send their children to school with cold poached salmon (high in Omega-3s) and whole grain salads (say a tasty tabbouleh), both to be washed down with pomegranate and acai berry juice and all packed up in a fancy little lunch boxes.
In this op-ed in the Washington Post, the first lady pushes for congressional passage of the Child Nutrition Act, a bill that would not only increase funding for the already-wasteful and badly managed school-lunch program but relax eligibility requirements so that more children can be enrolled.
Oh my god! There go the socialists shoving more food down poor kids throats. Those throat-cramming socialists, by the way, include the noted Marxist Saxby Chambliss who, along with a number of other Lenin-worshiping Republicans, supports the bill
If this country is going to get serious about childhood obesity, we need to detangle food and the public schools and get back to better parenting — basic parenting. Government doesn’t do anything well, least of all cooking.
This is rich coming from Julie Gumlock, a name that refers to the visceral reaction of most people when they encounter one of her culinary delights. Ms. Gumlock has printed a number of recipes in her food column in The Examiner including one called — I shit you not — Cheese Platter Pasta. Here is a shorter version of Cheese Platter Pasta:
- Boil some kind of pasta. Take some of the boiling water from the pasta and pour it into a bowl of leftover cheese from a cheese platter until the cheese gets all gooey. Drain the pasta and pour the cheese-water-mess all over the pasta. Yum.
I have to think that even on the worst day in the most pathetic school cafeteria in the deepest backwoods of Georgia every single tray of food served up from that kitchen would be tastier and more nutritious than Ms. Gumlock’s Cheese Platter Pasta, which disqualifies Ms. Gumlock absolutely and forever from uttering another word about any school lunch program.
When I, a manly man who hardly ever cooks (because my SO is going through culinary school, actually) can make better food than this woman, you KNOW she needs to gobble down* a big heaping plate of STFU.
*VFR
The Gumlock In The High Dudgeon was not one of Philip Dick’s best efforts.
I think we need to take up a collection to have Ms. Julie fired from her job and thrown out in the street, forced to eat in school kitchens. It would be a valuable learning experience for her (and a blessed relief got the rest of us).
God help any one of these fucking haterz who finds him/herself in a bad situation and forced to use the school breakfast or lunch program for his/her children. It would be poetic justice of the highest magnitude to see the look on the face of one of these fucking scumbags when she realizes, through uncontrollable circumstances like sudden unemployment, that being poor is usually not a result of being lazy or whatever the latest fashionable trope might be.
Hot water and leftover party snacks? Wow, I bet her Pringles Mashed Potatoes are almost as good as mine! (I add pimentos and fresh chopped chives, for a festive air.)
I’m guessing, and I confess I have not made a careful statistical or epidemiological study of the matter, but I’m guessing that school lunches for poor kids are not really a big cause of childhood obesity.
Anyway, weren’t they bitching last week that Mrs. Obama wants them to serve vegetables for lunch instead of Freedom Fries? (I know, I know, there I go again, expecting consistency from the wingnuts.)
but I’m guessing that school lunches for poor kids are not really a big cause of childhood obesity.
Strictly anecdotally speaking, I can say that the lunches and breakfasts they serve don’t help with the obesity problem either. That’s really what Michelle Obama is trying to rectify–better lunches, better education, teaching kids that not everything that is good comes in a vacuum sealed bag or out of a drive-thru window.
I’m guessing that school lunches for poor kids are not really a big cause of childhood obesity.
You obviously have not seen the menu in the average school cafeteria, which is loaded with fat and carbs. Not the leading cause, but a major contributer. Of course, without the school lunch a lot of those poor kids might not eat at all that day.
Wow, I bet her Pringles Mashed Potatoes are almost as good as mine!
Can’t touch my noodles with Cream of Mushroom soup! I add Parmesan cheese to make it seem like food. Honestly, it’s really good. I still eat it occasionally–on purpose, not just because I have to.
Of course, without the school lunch a lot of those poor kids might not eat at all that day.
WERE R TEH PARENT? IT IS THE PARENTS JOB 2 FEED THERE KIDS!!!! LIBZ JUST WANT FREE SHIT.
Oh please let them attack school lunches. That was one of the few things we were able to pin on “Teflon Ronnie” and make it stick. This is a huge loser for them, just remember “ketchup is a vegetable”.
I didn’t realize what was going on at the time, but in grade school and middle school there was a separate lunchtime for kids on the ‘free lunch’ program.
In keeping with Southern politics to incorporate shame into any aid for the poor, let me tell you, it was uncomfortable. The cafeterias weren’t filled like normal, the kids didn’t speak loud, didn’t laugh much.
The problem is that they had a school lunch program. What these kids should have gotten is a lot of beatings in case those who weren’t from abusive parents would know what was good for ’em.
Anyone who hasn’t seen it should watch Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution. I think it’s on Hulu. He struggles to get Huntington W Va, with the nation’s highest obesity and nutritional ill health rates, to change school menus away from the frozen shit-wagon of fake chicken nuggets and breakfast pink slime pizza to actual, you know, recognizable ingredients.
To be fair, this is a perfectly constructed and well executed total fallacy.
Remember that in large part, ‘welfare’ programs came about because of the hysteria against New Deal style public employment programs. Instead of giving the poor jobs, instead we had the opportunity to install a shameful and inefficient aid system which, while drastically helping the recipients over, say, nothing, had the benefit of allowing a great racist backlash against all the n****** getting gubmit munee wif out all da dang work.
As if. Who could even find a school with a free lunch program where parents aren’t out whoopin’ it up and painting the town red because they no longer have to pack mustard and pain sandwiches for their children?
Can’t touch my noodles with Cream of Mushroom soup! I add Parmesan cheese to make it seem like food. Honestly, it’s really good. I still eat it occasionally–on purpose, not just because I have to.
got to say, I slip into that occasionally, its like shitty comfort food….although I draw the line at cheese on instant noodles…. yuk
had the benefit of allowing a great racist backlash against all the n****** getting gubmit munee wif out all da dang work.
It really is fascinating how some things just never change, isn’t it? I’m currently reading what appears to be an excellent book about FDR. It’s called The New Dealer’s War. It focuses more on WWII, and how we entered it, but there is a strangely familiar accounting of the opposition’s psychotic rantings. It also does a good job of dealing FDR’s hubris and insistence on weird shit like trying to pack the Supreme Court with seven more justices.
because they no longer have to pack mustard and pain sandwiches for their children?
they actually have mustard where you are? Pampered I tell yah.
Seriously, my cooking skills are a joke among most of my friends and every woman I’ve ever dated. Even I could do better than that fucking recipe.
got to say, I slip into that occasionally, its like shitty comfort food
I would assume that most people do. Food can be like a sound or smell, invoking memories or old feelings. I think it reminds me of my time just out of the Army when I lived with my brother and we had a few friends hanging around all the time, worked jobs that didn’t crush the humanity out of us (In other words, alcohol was recreation instead of medicine), and just generally enjoyed life. Oh, and I was much better looking back then…pout…
Yeah, but few ever point out that the asshole Supremes in question cut out their anti-New Deal rampage after FDR put their asses on the line.
Funny how it’s always talked about as one of FDR’s great defeats, and you miss the 2nd stage.
We couldn’t afford pain. We just tried to sidle up next to people experience genuine human emotions and imagine what it would be like to be wealthy enough to experience things like pain.
Even I could do better than that fucking recipe.
No shit, huh? I’m a pretty shitty cook too, mostly due to laziness that stems from a longstanding disdain for any kitchen activity. Without the microwave, I wouldn’t have lived beyond my 20’s. But fuck, melting snack tray cheese with boiling water and pouring it over noodles? Yuck. I’d at least know to put the cheese in a pan with a little milk and melt it slowly.
Yeah, but few ever point out that the asshole Supremes in question cut out their anti-New Deal rampage after FDR put their asses on the line.
The book did go over that, hinting that the justices took it upon themselves to interpret the Constitution to mean that Federal intervention in a crisis somehow meant that freedom was being snatched from the hands of innocent Americans. More parallels with the modern day, aside from the fact that Obama and Clinton didn’t do anything remotely resembling New Deal economic policies. The book focused on FDR’s insistence on the bill, despite being painfully aware that it was never going to happen. As I read this thing, I can see what type of president I would likely be–aside from FDR actually having political skills and I’m sure I have none. I would be an insistent, hard headed asshole and twist every arm and stomp every nutbag and twist every titty until I got what I wanted, which would be social justice in domestic and foreign policy. Roosevelt was pretty damned good at that stuff–without direct confrontation or threats.
Shield your eyes, kids…I’m breakin’ out the c-bomb.
WHAT A FUCKING CUNT.
Seriously. The school lunch program is and has been incredibly underfunded for the last thirty years, and it’s been especially bad the last twenty. Yeah, parents *should* totally be able to feed their children on their own, but a large portion of them CAN’T, and when those kids are cranky and tired and underachieving because THEY ARE FUCKING STARVING, you’ll blame them for not trying hard enough. What the fuck kind of twisted, vile person do you have to be to believe this kind of shit?
I would also add that a large part of the childhood obesity problem isn’t because children have too much to eat; it’s because they don’t have enough. Junk food and fast foods are cheap, easy to attain, they taste good, and they fill kids’ bellies for a while. But that’s all they do. They don’t nourish children, and they most likely make them hungrier in the long run (blood sugar swings when you’re eight years old must AWESOME), so when kids do have access to food again, they are more likely to overeat.
The obesity “epidemic” is masking a huge problem of childhood starvation and food insecurity in this country…I guess kids should feel lucky that they have access to corn-based food analogs so instead of starving in the streets, they can be chastised for being lazy and gluttonous. This woman is a fucking monster.
Epic rant, T&U. Epic.
Can you tell this is something close to my heart?
BTW, this Tom Colicchio interview is great. Particularly this part, which makes me cry every time I read it:
“When we bring her to our house, she wants a salad. She ate asparagus for the first time and she couldn’t believe how good it was. We bring her strawberry picking and she had no idea that strawberries came out of the ground and didn’t realize how good they were – how delicious it was.”
What the FUCK, America?
When I was a little kid, school lunches were very basic—meat or beans with meat, starch (usually potato, mashed w/gravy), vegetable (canned), cornbread or biscuit, plain whole milk. They weren’t great, but we didn’t expect to be tantalized by food or to be catered to as a demographic. By junior high I was introduced to Frito pie and cardboard pizza, and would have rather had my boring meat and potato lunch with canned vegetables, thank you.
Oh, my point—this woman is a bitch.
This woman is a fucking monster.
Speaking of monster, have you guys tried these fucking energy drinks that adolescents are chugging by the case lately? Holy shit. That shit is POISON. I had pancreatitis about 6 years ago, which was a painful, nasty thing to endure. After kicking that, I had to kick a painkiller habit. Anyway, it went away, and after drinking a couple of those energy drinks, it came right back (as I was drinking the fucking thing).
I can’t believe they sell shit shit to kids. It’s quite obviously targeted at kids, look at the labels some time. It’s going to get ugly when they finally figure out the damage this fucking shit does to growing boys.
Forgot the link.
A friend of mine quit a well-paying PR job (especially for a 25-year-old) at a pharmaceutical company a couple of years ago to work on the cause of sustainable food and agriculture. She had some hard times, and makes a LOT less than she did, but she is working for a non-profit that pushes to improve the school lunch program and is involved with the first lady’s efforts. I am proud of her, and her life will have far more meaning and reach than any asshole who blogs at NRO.
“From the homicidal bitch
that goes down in every kitchen
to determine who will serve and who will eat”
Leonard Cohen. A god among the poets.
@tsam: I think what turned me off of them was that the spawn of Michael Savageweiner is the CEO of one of them (I can’t remember which company, as though there’s any difference). I already associated drinking them with douchebags, so I guess it’s logical that now I have the same association with their manufacture.
Oh, people not knowing where vegetables and fruit come from—-I was given a scholarship to be the kitchen manager in a student housing coop that was about to have the kitchen closed down because nobody knew how to run one. One student came to me after a delivery from the produce company, shoved a bunch of fresh spinach in my face, and said, “THIS HAS DIRT ON IT! DIRT!!!” She was indignant and wanted me to be indignant too and call the company on the carpet, or something, evidently, like she wanted to know where the hell that spinach had been and how they let that happen.
I said, “Yeah. It was grown in “dirt”. I figured the “soil” explanation was way too advanced.
“When we bring her to our house, she wants a salad. She ate asparagus for the first time and she couldn’t believe how good it was. We bring her strawberry picking and she had no idea that strawberries came out of the ground and didn’t realize how good they were – how delicious it was.”
I might be the luckiest dad in the world. All three of my daughters would rather have an apple than a candy bar. Not that they don’t WANT a candy bar, but I don’t keep candy bars around, and they eat the apples and bananas and carrot sticks. All we (when their mother and I were still together) did was feed them good food when they were young. Now they dont’ really even like fast food.
One time a relative of mine pointed out how one particular issue showed how right wing insane we had all become.
He was listening to a rant one time about how prisoners had better health care than regular poor people not in prison.
Being a society conquered by right wing insanitards, we don’t react in horror at how our poor people need better health care.
Instead we demand that prisoners get worse health care.
You know, sparrows roasted over curtain rods under a bridge.
@wiley: Next time, try telling her it’s got electrolytes.
Speaking of monster, have you guys tried these fucking energy drinks that adolescents are chugging by the case lately?
I’ll admit to consuming a diet Red Bull now and again, but no. Those look horrifying.
What the fuck does a 14-year-old need with an “energy drink” anyway? If the kid has problems with energy, he probably isn’t getting enough sleep and/or eats like shit…
And now I’m going to restrain myself from a rant about school times being inappropriately structured for teenagers.
The Kid from Kounty Meath said,
August 4, 2010 at 6:19
Oh wow, I had no idea that his hatchling ran one of these companies. One more reason not to like them–although I can’t help but feel sorry for someone who didn’t have a choice but to live with that fucking demon for 18 years.
Jamie Oliver trying to get schoolkids to recognize such exotic vegetables as tomatoes and potatoes and carrots with little success. I think it was a reach to expect really young kids to recognize beets or eggplant, but potatoes and tomatoes I damn well knew as a kid, even in Real Amurka.
And now I’m going to restrain myself from a rant about school times being inappropriately structured for teenagers.
Do you remember Willie Nelson saying that they should start school later so that kids weren’t so tired? All the conservative fuckwads got all over him for it until (well even after) a bunch of scientists showed numerous studies that proved that teenagers don’t do well with current school hours and rarely get enough sleep as an aggregate. It was pretty funny to see Willie looking all smart and shit.
It’s just *sad* to me, because strawberry and blackberry picking were a part of my summers. Obviously, I was a rural kid, so access to those things was much easier, but my overarching point here is that food isn’t just for our bodies–it’s for our families and for our culture. Children are losing out on precious experiences everywhere because they’re too poor and/or their parents don’t know or don’t care to take the time to prepare real food.
Jamie Oliver trying to get schoolkids to recognize such exotic vegetables as tomatoes and potatoes and carrots with little success.
HOLY shit.
Do you remember Willie Nelson saying that they should start school later so that kids weren’t so tired?
I don’t, but good for him.
Our education system is so so so SO SO SO fucked on so many fucking levels, and it’s just getting worse. Yeah, it totally makes sense to stick first-graders in a classroom for 7 hours a day and expect them to be quiet, “well-behaved,” and able to pass some arbitrary bullshit test. RECESS IS GOOD, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES.
it’s for our families and for our culture
TOTALLY agree. I don’t like kids coming up having no idea, and not giving a shit where their food comes from. How it was made/grown, what’s in it, why we choose to eat correctly. Dinner together at the table is largely a thing of the past. I have to confiscate all the cell phones during dinner. I have to shut off the tv. I have to turn the screen off of the goddamn computer so they aren’t sneaking a look to see if an IM came in for them. It’s frustrating.
These are the things that make me want to take a baseball bat to those fucking conservative shitbags that act like they own family values. They don’t know jack shit about family. They never did, they never will.
You should see when Oliver explores the food storage section of the school cafeteria. There isn’t a single real ingredient to be found. You get more freshly prepared food at McDonalds. Well, and also lots of pink slime, but that’s anywhere a national chain uses ground beef.
Or when he takes a chicken carcass stripped of typical cuts of light & dark meat, chops it up, throws it in a blender with some water and makes a slurry of chicken & bone goo.
Thinking kids will now be horrified, he asks them who would eat that, and they all raise their hands.
One of the biggest struggles he has, and loses, with the US school nutrition bureaucracy is that the milk the kids have to be served is mostly strawberry and chocolate milk with truly impressive amounts of sugar in them.
Not to mention all the fucking white-flight nouveau riche motherfucking assholes who are actually GETTING public vouchers to send their kids to scummy religious schools, further impoverishing our education system.
New topic;
Is it wrong of me to strongly believe that these fucking Repukes trying to repeal the 14th amendment are committing an act of war against the Constitution and need to be dealt with appropriately (as the Confederacy was)?
You know as a Briton, this sorta stuff almost makes me pine for the days of empire when our betters used to rule us rude mechanicals. There are many horrid things about the class system, and the ‘muscular Christianity’ that propelled it (the English lower classes caring little for religion), but by the Edwardian era it had created a class of people with a sense of duty towards the lower orders. A duty of care, you might say. An echo of feudal responsibility.
Our modern betters don’t even have that. Just a festering class resentment. Even having won the class war they continue to fight it. A boot stamping on a man’s face, forever…
Nobody seems to be openly mentioning Sections 3 & 4 of the 14th Amendment.
The GOP is angry that the 14th Amendment so harshly treated Confederate patriots, and to this day would still prevent those engaged in insurrection against the US government from holding high federal political positions — and this is unfair to TeaTardia in general.
They may be talking about the birth naturalization part, but I also think they’re mad at the parts discriminating against the patriotism and debts of Confederate-Americans.
I’ve always liked the idea of tracing these douchebags back to the first generation to arrive from Europe, and if they didn’t meet the immigration standards of today (which of course they wouldn’t, since we were letting anyone in who wasn’t an inscrutable Chinaman back then), their right-wing taintweasel descendants get deported.
It’s just *sad* to me, because strawberry and blackberry picking were a part of my summers. Obviously, I was a rural kid, ……
I grew up in the city (well,actually, the boring suburbs), and we were still dragged out berry picking in the late summer every year (most of which went to make my father’s home made wine). My folks had fruit and veg growing in the back garden, and at school we were taught where food comes from (and how to cook it, when we were old enough not to burn our hands off). And I didn’t grow up in some granola bar middle class neighbourhood. Looking at kids now-a-days (and I hate sounding like my mother), its just sad that they have never done these things, and don’t know the pleasure of picking and cooking your own food (as well as stealing home made wine at 13).
Instead, we’ve got a fast food generation with the related health and medical problems. Its almost as if the supermarkets and foot companies planned it that way……
Gumlock is what happens to you when you encounter Julie’s haute cuisine.
A restaurant that would feature “some kinda pasta laden with cheese water mess” is a restaurant that would pay you to eat there. Then pay your hospital bill.
It’s so true. Were it not for the handouts, these kids might be inspired by the lunches of the Randian Uberkind around, and get off their lazy asses to make enough money to feed themselves. Some of them could even become Randian Uberkind themselves once they freed themselves from the teat of society!
I mean, if they weren’t so ethnic.
“…around them, and get off their…”
Fucking potatoes, how do they work?
Our modern betters don’t even have that. Just a festering class resentment. Even having won the class war they continue to fight it.
They have to. Democracy was a big blow to the elites, so they have to be a little more creative these days.
I grew up in a pretty poor neighborhood. For a pretty significant percentage of the kids I went to school with, the only real meal they got all day was at school. For some kids, it was the main reason to bother to show up. If you can’t understand what it’s like to be so hungry that you show up an hour early to eat the kind of barely-food they serve in school cafeterias, you seriously need to enroll in a course at Sierra Tango Foxtrot University.
We are inherently compassionate creatures. If a starving kid was on her door, I bet Ms. Gunlock would feed them. But it’s almost as though knowing and admitting that millions of kids go hungry every day is a bigger sin than feeding them. Compassion for one person is simple smalltown American human decency. Compassion for millions of people is socialism, which is Hitler.
Maybe that explains a lot of what we find so perplexing about the right: behind every social program is the admission that a social ill exists, and people of good conscience need to, and can, do something about it. For them, it’s offensive to point out problems. It’s like charging the guy who pointed out the Emperor has no clothes with indecent exposure.
Sure, poverty is tough on innocent little kids who both don’t deserve it and are our nation’s future &c., but you liberals are the real monsters for making us have to consider that reality for a few moments!
You should see when Oliver explores the food storage section of the school cafeteria. There isn’t a single real ingredient to be found. You get more freshly prepared food at McDonalds. Well, and also lots of pink slime, but that’s anywhere a national chain uses ground beef.
I wish cafeterias would just serve black beans and rice for every meal. Nutritionally complete, and $0.20 a serving, or less. And the only side effects from eating it every day are being good at dancing and having a nice ass, if Brazil is any indicator.
I don’t think so. If she’s willing to suffer the jeers of saying “Let them eat cake” in public, she’d probably do the same in private. At best if you brought up that you were a starving child (or a parent having trouble feeding their kid), she would say she didn’t mean you, just those undeserving types.
If a starving kid was on her door, I bet Ms. Gunlock would feed them.
To what?
I can’t get my daughter (12) to eat healthy food. Not even fruit like apples or strawberries! Forget veges. I make it and she refuses to eat it, or takes a bite and spits it out. I fix her a healthy lunch, and find it next day under her bed. I won’t buy her junk food, but her Dad does, and she gobbles it down. Causes a lot of bitter arguments. I just don’t know what to do.
Anon above is me
What? And leave our children unable to fulfill the “fried nugget” portion of the food pyramid?
KWillow: I haven’t a clue what to do. My father would just threaten to beat the shit out of us if we didn’t eat everything on our plates, but that just made us hate eating with him.
Will she cook?
If it makes you feel better, Jamie Oliver barely got any of these kids eating healthy fresh real food and the moment they had a choice they went right for the sugar/salt/fat super-explodo combo.
More thread convergence: Tonight’s dinner chez Bouffant.
I am very stupid. Diet, perhaps?
Although read the last line of the accidentally-linked Dodger item. He’s no Rocket Surgeon.
Christ, what an asshole.
If a starving kid was on her door, I bet Ms. Gunlock would feed them.
To what?
I dunno, maybe she is a sociopath. I wouldn’t rule it out. You have to be pretty twisted to be trying to think of a column topic and come up with, “you know who sucks? Poor kids.”
My point was there are a ton of people who are not sociopaths, yet still treat helping large numbers of people 24×7 as a Great Evil whereas helping small numbers of people for a couple of hours on Sunday afternoon before Vespers is True Holiness.
The Gumlock In The High Dudgeon was not one of Philip Dick’s best efforts.
Philip K. Dick wrote that? Here I thought it was a Dungeons & Dragons adventure.
I can’t get my daughter (12) to eat healthy food…I don’t know what to do
I’d say don’t fret it too much. I never ate my vegetables either until I got older. My mother used to force me to sit at the table for hours on end as an effort to make me finish my veggies but it never quite worked. They made me physically gag.
Kids usually aren’t lying when they claim they can’t stand the flavor or texture of something, but their taste buds and eating habits will mature eventually as long as there are good examples around them. It might even do harm to make too much of an issue out of it when they’re still young IMO.
Not that I’m an expert on nutrition or child rearing or anything. I was, however, pretty much an expert on Happy Meals and their related toy distribution patterns as a child.
To mention Oliver again, it seemed to help when he showed one terribly obese and unhealthy family (self-admitted) what they ate in one week, all at once, making it all, and pouring it out on the table. It was not a pleasant scene.
And remember, this guy isn’t a snob-ass — he completely recognizes that people have to grow up today without any of the food traditions that their family and communities used to teach.
And not just out of tradition — a million years ago when gubmit interventshun wasn’t seen as just teh ebbil negro Kenyanism, the UK and US governments would help people, particularly young mothers, with lessons on how to understand meals, prepare them, and do so hygienically.
On the other hand, a tradition of nagging the lower classes about their eating habits isn’t new either.
Orwell, in The Road to Wigan Pier. An unemployed miner shares with him his family’s listed budget. (A lot of miners were out of work in those days.) He goes through the awful limits and conflicts in detail. And gets back around to the topic of the piece, class & food.
Continued to avoid spambot terminators.
As so many have pointed out, the problem now isn’t as typically a brute scarcity of calories and foodstuffs available. (Increasingly, though — we’re doing what we can to make the poverty diet more mainstream through economic collapse.)
We have, instead, sugar/fat/salt blasts to take our minds off of whatever it is which bothers us about our role in today’s society. And the constant availability of prepared foods to ‘aid’ us — sometimes literally, sometimes figuratively — as we have to work more and more hours with both parents working if 2 are present and insane struggling if only 1 is there.
Once again, we let the society as run by the callous right and their over-masters, the super-rich, put all the hurdles to a good healthy life in front of everyone to jump, and instead of trying to move these hurdles out of the way, we have no idea that they don’t have to be there, and we keep handing around self-help tips on how to better try to jump these hurdles.
Crap. Orwell link.
You kids these days.
The production of sugar on islands off of Spain and Portugal in the necessary plantation / high manual labor format is basically what launched the trans-Atlantic African slave trade.
Good thing poor Latin immigrants are now available to work in our industrial poultry and exploding fecal matter plants, now that they just migrate here out of desperation, otherwise there would be a lot less fried chicken tenders available.
Oh, good.
Now it may be the case that fructose — for decades now so easily available in the industrially preferred sweetener high fructose corn syrup — may be just the right nutrition to feed hungry, growing cancer cells.
Perhaps her defective thought-processes are due to cramming her piehole with too much of this:
Boil some kind of pasta. Take some of the boiling water from the pasta and pour it into a bowl of leftover cheese from a cheese platter until the cheese gets all gooey. Drain the pasta and pour the cheese-water-mess all over the pasta. Yum.
Yum?
Only for values of “yum” that = “holy shit, what the hell IS that?!”
You’ve just ruined some perfectly good pasta – & killed my appetite.
PROTIP: avoid recipes that include “cheese-water-mess” unless you’re thinking of exploring the wonderful world of bulemia.
You’ve just ruined some perfectly good pasta – & killed my appetite.
No kidding. It’s not like making pasta is a mind-boggling culinary feat. Microwaves heat up Prego in, like, two minutes. Hell, buy yourself a can of Chef Boyardee and knock the whole thing down to one step if you’re that goddamn lazy.
You won’t believe how many people I’ve shocked when I show them that most cheeses they use actually melt into a mix of butter and milk / cream. And that you can use this on pasta or stuff. It’s like they never thought of it.
OT: the Oregon Tea Party has my deepest sympathies.
Can you explain to me what this means? Is it anything more than some weird and obsessive internet types have been pissed off by the OTP and will now bug the shit out of them? If so, I’m good with that.
By the way, a really quick yummy recipe for dinner for all these lousy poor people complainin’ about bein’ hungry & shit is to get cheap store brand chicken noodle soup and pour it in a pot and then cut up a can of Spam in it and get a loaf of white bread and mush it in and then, I don’t know, put it in a bowl or roll it in tinfoil or something.
Ain’t. No. Such. Thing.
Pet fucking peeve. You can be one, or you can be t’other. You want to be American? OK. You can’t support treason. Period. You want to be a Confederate? Fine with me. Don’t you dare pretend to wave the Stars and Stripes.
What sort of intellectual dishonesty, and not even the public kind, but to oneself, does it take to try to lay claim to loyalty to both opposing sides of a war, even one long finished, hell, especially one long finished?
Only those who have risen in an insurrection against their own country can truly know what it is to love one’s country. And it’s not the fault of Confederate-Americans that it took so long for everyone to realize that they were just trying to protect America from the n******.
WHAT A FUCKING CUNT.
As the old punchline goes, she lacks the depth, the charm, and the warmth.
Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution shocked me early in the six episode run:
They’re feeding the little bastards pizza for breakfast!
Shorter Gumdrop:
“Let them eat Gorgonzola.”
And just to underline my culinary fascism, nothing but Ted’s homemade pesto goes on Ted’s pasta.
I’m appalled, honestly, to hear that the school lunch program includes junk food and “Frito pies” (whatever that might be). I had visions of steam tables covered in bland-but-nutritious food. Given the way the wingnuts freak out when somebody buys something other than oatmeal with food stamps, I just assumed this program would have some sort of “You’ll eat what’s in front of you and LIKE IT” aspect.
But, I guess even when we’re trying to get one decent meal into hungry kids, it’s still important to make sure the junk food manufacturers get their share. I wish Mrs. Obama every success.
A Google search on “Frito Pie” suggests that it’s a bag of Fritos cut open and some hot chili dumped on the chips inside. Shredded cheese (or more likely, cheese food product) optional.
I don’t know about you all, but that “cheese platter pasta” don’t sound half bad.
But then, I just smoked a big fat doob.
The GOP is angry that the 14th Amendment so harshly treated Confederate patriots, and to this day would still prevent those engaged in insurrection against the US government from holding high federal political positions
Once again, the GOP reminds us that Sherman stopped too soon.
Also, re school lunches, at my lower-lower-middle/lower class elementary school in urbania, about 1/4 of the kids got free lunches and about half of that group got free breakfast as well. I had cereal (non-sugar or wrath of ‘rents) for breakfast at home and a sandwich and apple in a brown paper bag for lunch and I envied the kids eating the school food. Their meals smelled great and, this being the early 70s, were actually food.
Also, also: T&U, did you remember to vote?
Scumbags: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/03/ground-zero-mosque-appeal_n_669426.html
My office is closer to the WTC site than the Cordoba center would be. Does that mean it’s a hallowed site? Can I declare my business to be a church of the cult of WTC and myself as high priest? I WANNA WEAR A FUNNY HAT!
The GOP is angry that the 14th Amendment so harshly treated Confederate patriots, and to this day would still prevent those engaged in insurrection against the US government from holding high federal political positions — and this is unfair to TeaTardia in general.
They may be talking about the birth naturalization part, but I also think they’re mad at the parts discriminating against the patriotism and debts of Confederate-Americans.
Nah, it’s the naturalization. They’ve come to the belated realization that even if we close the border completely, outlaw immigration and kick out all the people who immigrated illegally, the Latinos are breeding fast enough that within a generation or two they’ll be “overrun” anyway. So now they’re looking for ways to deport the legal Latinos as well.
” of W I WANNA WEAR A FUNNY HAT!”
Why not? It is a Wednesday.
Once again, the GOP reminds us that Sherman stopped too soon.
Sometimes, when I’m pissed off, I wish Sherman had nukes…
Does that mean it’s a hallowed site?
Yes. So every time you haul your liberal ass into work, Real American Tuff Guys cry. And any time you visit the restroom, you kill a keyboard commando.
Hizzonor, by the way, laid down some epic hurt on the bigots, well worth a read.
But then, I just smoked a big fat doob.
i hate you, im 2 weeks and 8000 km’s from my next joint…….
Opinion polls on whether or not to build the mosque (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cordoba_House#Polls):
Across the United States: 20% in favor, 54% opposed.
Across New York City: 31% in favor, 52% opposed.
Across Manhattan: 46% in favor, 35% opposed.
Location of the mosque and the former World Trade Center; Manhattan.
Hello, Southerners and Alaskans. Welcome to the United States of Get The Fuck Off My Lawn. You get to celebrate treason and slavery over your state houses, and your bluebelly countrymen get to decide where to put buildings located in their own districts. You weren’t bullshitting us with all that local government stuff, were you?
Those poll results really make me feel disheartened.
Thanks for the speech, Ted. I don’t know anything about Bloomberg, but I’ve decided a guy who gives a speech like this can’t be all bad.
Dear Penthouse Forum,
I never thought this would happen to me. One night I went over a Dickensian-named wingnut’s house. It started innocently enough with us discussing how poor children should pull themselves up by their bootstraps, but the evening wore on…and the woman said she wanted to share with me something called a “cheese water mess.” I won’t lie to you: I was intrigued.
After I saw what she made, I puked my guts out. Then we had hot woman on wingnut sex.
Barfily Yours,
vacuumslayer
VS, if it’ll make you feel any better, the articles wikipedia links to also mention that “While a majority opposed the center, 55 percent of those questioned said “mainstream Islam” is a “peaceful religion.” To 22 percent of respondents, the religion “encourages violence against non-Muslims.” Another 23 percent were undecided.”
(That’s New Yorkers, not Americans).
Speaking of pasta that won’t make you barf, yours truly made homemade meatballs in homemade marinara last night. Lotsa fresh basil. Yeah, it was redonk.
BTW, hot water can’t melt cheese. To melt most cheeses (save the “cheese” Velveeta) you have to grate them then add them to a roux. But, heck, why bother with that when you can have hot cheese mess. Somebody pass me my puke bucket.
“55 percent of those questioned said “mainstream Islam” is a “peaceful religion.””
I guess that’s something…although I’m not even sure *I* agree with that sentiment. Most religions don’t seem to preach peace enough. Another reason I’m glad I don’t partake of them.
I think it mostly just stems from having lived alongside enough Muslims to know that they’re no different from the rest of them. Which translates into “Islam must be a peaceful religion because the Muslims I know are peaceful.”
I guess that just proves the importance of KNOWING someone who is Muslim or gay or liberal or trans or whatever. When you know someone who is one (or several) of those things, it’s hard to make a monster of them.
a bill that would not only increase funding for the already-wasteful and badly managed school-lunch program
It’s interesting the way that these jackasses throw claims like this around as though they were obvious truths that need no support. I have no idea whether the school lunch program is poorly managed or wasteful, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it’s not.
Besides, feeding kids in school increases their ability to learn, and we certainly don’t want them to know more than how to read a clock and make change.
Assholes.
I guess that just proves the importance of KNOWING someone who is Muslim or gay or liberal or trans or whatever. When you know someone who is one (or several) of those things, it’s hard to make a monster of them.
As T&U would say, DING DING DING DING DING!!!
Orwell, in The Road to Wigan Pier. An unemployed miner shares with him his family’s listed budget. (A lot of miners were out of work in those days.) He goes through the awful limits and conflicts in detail. And gets back around to the topic of the piece, class & food.
YES. I always think of that when I hear people talk about how poor people spend their money on nasty food and shit that they think is stupid. When you live in grinding poverty, it’s the small things that matter.
throw claims like this around as though they were obvious truths that need no support.
Teh argument from authoriteh.
The frequency of its use is inversely related to a person’s level of education.
Y’all are making me hungry for good pasta. And I’m not going to get to have any ’cause I’m actually a worse cook than Julie Gaglock.
If a starving kid was on her door, I bet Ms. Gunlock would feed them.
You know, I don’t know about that. The husband told me that his former boss, who is a Blue Dog Dem and a halfway decent human being, said that he would only donate to the food bank if he knew that the food was going to the “right kind of people.” Now, obviously, there are racial implications behind that, but I think he meant, you know, people whom he self-righteously determined to be undeserving.
In other words, some people have conditional “compassion”…and I’d bet she’s one of them…
Political incorrectness galore from one of my facebook friends;
“Slack Jawed Liberal, the concept of the day, in honor of the most embarrassing political party this side of the decade. Hitler managed to take over a continent with less than a majority in Reichstag, the Democrats can’t get a functional unemployment bill passed with control of 59% of the Senate and 10% unemployment.”
He’s got a point!
Y’all are making me hungry for good pasta. And I’m not going to get to have any ’cause I’m actually a worse cook than Julie Gaglock.
Pasta, fresh basil, parmesan, and olive oil. Tomatoes are in season, so you could cut up one of those and dump it in there. Make sure you salt the pasta water well. Seriously, really easy.
OR instead of the tomato, you could mince some garlic and sautee it in some olive oil and use the garlic and olive oil for your pasta. Or add a whole clove (probably split in half) to some oil and then take it out once it’s soft and add the oil to your pasta.
In this op-ed in the Washington Post, the first lady pushes for congressional passage of the Child Nutrition Act, a bill that would not only increase funding for the already-wasteful and badly managed school-lunch program but relax eligibility requirements so that more children can be enrolled.
*GASP*
You mean that somewhere, there’s a fat cat bureaucrat eating foie gras while our children eat nutritionally balanced hash and Sloppy Joes? And he’ll die of heart disease long before our kids can lynch him?
Boil some kind of pasta. Take some of the boiling water from the pasta and pour it into a bowl of leftover cheese from a cheese platter until the cheese gets all gooey. Drain the pasta and pour the cheese-water-mess all over the pasta. Yum.
If she’s feeding her kids this, we ought to have Child Services called in.
i hate you, im 2 weeks and 8000 km’s from my next joint…….
Wow. You must be fat! Have you met our resident nutritionist, Julie Gunlock?
WHAT A FUCKING CUNT.
As the old punchline goes, she lacks the depth, the charm, and the warmth.
And was drier than.
I will give this woman credit- I’m not entirely sure her pasta dish is worse than Megan McWharrgarble’s famed dump-a-bunch-of-salt-over-microwaved-veggies-and-a-pound-of-pasta one from a few years ago.
My office is closer to the WTC site than the Cordoba center would be. Does that mean it’s a hallowed site?
This ought to be fun. The SCOTUS itself basically said the City Landmarks Commission has final say in such matters (read up on the effort to save Grand Central Terminal).
Someone’s trying to drum up business in a soft economy.
I’m appalled, honestly, to hear that the school lunch program includes junk food and “Frito pies” (whatever that might be). …But, I guess even when we’re trying to get one decent meal into hungry kids, it’s still important to make sure the junk food manufacturers get their share.”
Here is the dirty secret of agricultural policy in the U.S. – the gov’t heavily subsidizes precisely the foods that are the most fatty and least nutritious, because those are foods that the largest food corporations (McDonald’s, BK, Coca-Cola, etc) buy in bulk and that form the basis of their business – and profits. Corn is the biggest offender. The USDA estimates that some form of corn product is in 90% of the processed and manufactured food sold in this country. Shit like guar gum, carageenan, and our friend high-fructose corn syrup is ubiquitous and – thanks to Uncle Sam – it’s dirt cheap for the food companies. So they produce fatty, horrible food cheaply and then secure gov’t contracts to supply school lunches so they can market their shit to your children. Hooray for the American way!
Pasta, fresh basil, parmesan, and olive oil. Tomatoes are in season, so you could cut up one of those and dump it in there. Make sure you salt the pasta water well. Seriously, really easy.
OR instead of the tomato, you could mince some garlic and sautee it in some olive oil and use the garlic and olive oil for your pasta. Or add a whole clove (probably split in half) to some oil and then take it out once it’s soft and add the oil to your pasta.
That’s all real nice, T&U, but seriously, completely seriously, when I say I’m a “worse cook than Julie Gaglock,” I actually mean I’m a worse cook than Julie Gaglock.
The reason I eat canned soup most nights is because I wouldn’t know how to cut up a tomato, I’ve never minced a garlic in my life, I wouldn’t buy a clove if you paid me to, and I have not one single clue how to sautee anything. I assume it’s done on top of a stove, with a pan, preferably fully clothed and wearing a lead-lined apron and a welder’s mask.
” to, and I have not one single clue how to sautee anything. I assume it’s done on top of a stove, with a pan, preferably fully clothed and wearing a lead-lined apron and a welder’s mask.”
So close!!
Sauteeing is not significantly more difficult than heating up a can of soup, but the welder’s mask is certainly a good idea. Safety first!
Is it just my imagination or could Julie stand to do a few push-aways¹?
¹ Push-aways — like push-ups but they involve moving away from the dinner table and not the floor.
Corn is the biggest offender.
Just wait. A study was released this week that shows that cancer cells thrive on fructose, particularly high fructose corn syrup, while sucrose has little impact on accelerating cancer growth.
Hey guys, my web designer needs a name for my message board. It’s gonna be for discussing art, music, film, whatevs… Anyway it needs a title. Ideas?
I assume it’s done on top of a stove, with a pan, preferably fully clothed and wearing a lead-lined apron and a welder’s mask.
Sautee? It’s done on a stove?
And here I thought it was a brand of soft-serve ice cream that comes around the neighborhood with a truck and that obnoxious jingle….Deedle dee dee, dee dee dee, dee dee dee dee DEEEE DEEE….
You know, Mr Sautee!
“Beth’s Broad”
Is it the horizontal stripes?
No, those slim you.
Or is it vertical? I can never remember.
The reason I eat canned soup most nights is because I wouldn’t know how to cut up a tomato, I’ve never minced a garlic in my life, I wouldn’t buy a clove if you paid me to, and I have not one single clue how to sautee anything. I assume it’s done on top of a stove, with a pan, preferably fully clothed and wearing a lead-lined apron and a welder’s mask.
Nobody’s born knowing these things! That’s what fire extinguishers are for!
There’s all sorts of crap on the Food Network website, including videos, if you’re interested. If not, that’s okay, too. There are worse things to subsist off of than canned soup.
Corn is the biggest offender.
Kreed.
you have to grate them then add them to a roux
What’s a roux? Do you have to grate it? Roux sounds suspiciously French. I don’t like it. Doesn’t this come in a Kraft box to be mixed with water? That’s cheese, right?
I’ve never minced a garlic in my life
No, but I bet you’ve minced a few old salts down by the docks…
Corn is the biggest offender.
Overuse of processed soy ain’t great either, especially for little boys.
What’s a roux?
It’s the second note in the scale.
You know, “Doe roux mi fa so la ti d’oh!”
they produce fatty, horrible food cheaply and then secure gov’t contracts to supply school lunches so they can market their shit to your children. Hooray for the American way!
Don’t forget to follow that upstream. You are paying to grow that corn.
Mike asks Which organizations are working to reform our school lunch program and how can I get involved?
Then he gives some answers.
You can mince salt?
What’s a roux?
Roux’s the sauce men are best equipped to cook. You basically take the juicy leavings of meat in a sauce pan, throw in some flour and burn the fucker.
Don’t forget to follow that upstream. You are paying to grow that corn.
Also, with e coli, too!
BTW, when I said “clove,” I meant a clove of garlic. Not actual cloves. That would be fucking gross.
You can mince salt?
No, but you can mince sailors.
Not actual cloves. That would be fucking gross.
Goatist!
“What’s a roux? Do you have to grate it? Roux sounds suspiciously French. I don’t like it. Doesn’t this come in a Kraft box to be mixed with water? That’s cheese, right?”
I wouldn’t make a roux,tsam. Might make you gay.
But seriously, roux is jeust a bit of flor and a bit of fat stirred in a pan. Add some sort of liquid and forms a thick sort of sauce that works as a base for lots of didderent stuff.
But seriously, roux is jeust a bit of flor and a bit of fat stirred in a pan. Add some sort of liquid and forms a thick sort of sauce that works as a base for lots of didderent stuff.
Funny…this resembles English…
Jesus. I can’t type for shit on this thing.
Roux’s the sauce men are best equipped to cook. You basically take the juicy leavings of meat in a sauce pan, throw in some flour and burn the fucker.
Or butter. If you can make a decent roux, you can make pretty much any sauce. Including gravy for biscuits and gravy. *sob*
The coolest thing about rouxs is that the French have different names for them depending on how long the flour has been toasted…
“Funny…this resembles English”
I know. So close. It’s my own language I refudiate “plain” English. So boring.
I like “didderent”!
Including gravy for biscuits and gravy
What’s the gravy for? I never understood that dish. You ruin a perfectly good biscuit, one you could be dipping in olive oil, with gravy.
Everyone knows, gravy’s for potatoes and foreplay.
I wouldn’t make a roux,tsam. Might make you gay.
Meh–I’ve been rethinking my dating strategy lately anyway. I have this overwhelming urge to pronounce it rowx (enunciating the x). Pretty sure that keeps me from earning my gay card for the moment.
Including gravy for biscuits and gravy.
Jennifer said you needed tits for this.
What’s the gravy for?
Why do you hate America?
The coolest thing about rouxs is that the French have different names for them depending on how long the flour has been toasted…
I’m very fond of the French.
Heh heh… “juicy leavings of meat”
I’m very fond of the French.
That’s pure sedition.
” I have this overwhelming urge to pronounce it rowx (enunciating the x). Pretty sure that keeps me from earning my gay card for the moment.”
Nope. No gay card for you. Too bad. It was shiny and fabulous.
“I’m very fond of the French”
I see what you did there.
What’s the gravy for? I never understood that dish. You ruin a perfectly good biscuit, one you could be dipping in olive oil, with gravy.
Biscuits and olive oil? WHAT?
Biscuits and gravy are a cheap way to fill up your tummy so you can go work in the fields. Not that anybody does that anymore. There’s a reason why Midwesterners are so fat.
Why do you hate America?
Lemme see…Sarah Palin, the Republican party, Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, the NFL, most of Wyoming (except the elk and wolves, and maybe the bears), American Idol, parts of Florida, the fact that Florida’s not an erect penis, the embargo on Cuba, Texas…especially Texas, with the exception of Austin and some parts of San Antonio, the border fence, the lack of freedom, the SCOTUS, Republicans, conservatives, Teabaggers, Sean Hannity, Newsmax, FOX (except House and the Simpsons and Family Guy), Blue Dog Democrats, bits of Marina Del Rey, Shark Week…
I see what you did there.
*whew* I thought it might be too subtle.
Biscuits and olive oil? WHAT?
There’s more to Italian food than The Olive Garden.
Why do you hate America?
HA! I’ll admit that reaction was probably somewhere deep down in my soul when I read that, although I’m ashamed to admit it. Fucking Midwesterners and their fucking breakfast.
And I prefer brunch anyway. Any meal in which it’s socially acceptable to drink alcohol before 12:00 AND have coffee is pretty much the best.
“There’s more to Italian food than The Olive Garden.”
Yeah. There’s Carrabas.
Why do you hate America?
….Nike sneakers, General Motors, the banking industry, hedge funds, the Federalist Papers, the St Louis Arch (which I always believed should have a giant croquet player standing behind it), the St Louios Cardinals, the Atlanta Braves, Dallas Cowboys, Indian casinos, cigarettes, the fact that marijuana is criminal but alcohol is not, crystal meth, Dennis Miller, Kelsey Grammer, the fact that it’s not Canada, bigotry, Texas, South Carolina, voter fraud, the SEC, the DMV, the GOP….
Any meal in which it’s socially acceptable to drink alcohol before 12:00 AND have coffee is pretty much the best.
So you’ve been to breakfast in my bed.
House, I mean. House.
There’s more to Italian food than The Olive Garden.
Niiiiiice.
I prefer dipping good ciabatta in olive oil. I think the flavors go together better. Although I suppose you could make a more savory, crustier biscuit and that could be good.
Nope. No gay card for you. Too bad. It was shiny and fabulous.
Guess I need to go all in and do the buttsecks. You wanna do a strap-on job?
The coolest thing about rouxs is that the French have different names for them depending on how long the flour has been toasted…
In Nawlins it’s called Cajun Napalm. You have to stir it constantly and should you get exuberant and splash some on you it will be an incident seared into both your flesh and memory.
Cheese platter pasta? “leftover cheese platter?”
Well, certainly! poor people can certainly feed their children on the leftovers they bring home from their jobs as maidservants and waitstaff for rich folks’ parties!! And the more parties rich folks throw, the more fine meals poor peoples’ children will have. party on!
….Nike sneakers, General Motors, the banking industry, hedge funds, the Federalist Papers, the St Louis Arch (which I always believed should have a giant croquet player standing behind it), the St Louios Cardinals, the Atlanta Braves, Dallas Cowboys, Indian casinos, cigarettes, the fact that marijuana is criminal but alcohol is not, crystal meth, Dennis Miller, Kelsey Grammer, the fact that it’s not Canada, bigotry, Texas, South Carolina, voter fraud, the SEC, the DMV, the GOP….
But aside from that and a few hundred other problems, what the fuck?
Haha–“clever” wingnut response: “Just be glad you have the freedom to say that without getting killed!”
“Nope. No gay card for you. Too bad. It was shiny and fabulous.
Guess I need to go all in and do the buttsecks. You wanna do a strap-on job?”
I’ve always got your back. Literally!
Why do you hate America?
…suburban sprawl, SUVs, sporks, fast food, idiots like Gunlock here, concern trolls, Troofie, the DH, instant replay, security cameras everywhere, the Second Amendment, the paranoia that has us wiping our hands with antibacterial gels before picking up a gun and blowing away our coworkers, Columbine, the fall of intellect, the rise of stupidity, that Americans use twice as much gasoline per capita as the next closest nation (Germany)….
BTW, questioning my foodie credentials (especially with bread, since I have to live it vicariously now) is a good way to bring violence on yourself.
Haha–”clever” wingnut response: “Just be glad you have the freedom to say that without getting killed!”
My reply
Ok, I seriously can’t think of a name for my forum. I was thinking of doing some take on “BigSomething” but I just can’t think of anything funny. I may just go with “Forum”. Yawn.
In Nawlins it’s called Cajun Napalm. You have to stir it constantly and should you get exuberant and splash some on you it will be an incident seared into both your flesh and memory.
Um, yeah, ouch. They cook the fuck out of their rouxs, and I am far too impatient to do that. This is also why I never make risotto.
questioning my foodie credentials (especially with bread, since I have to live it vicariously now) is a good way to bring violence on yourself.
I probably deserve a bust in the mouth for that, huh?
I probably deserve a bust in the mouth for that, huh?
Yes, but not the one you’d prefer.
I think, anyway…
I was thinking of doing some take on “BigSomething” but I just can’t think of anything funny. I may just go with “Forum”.
“BigTits”
“BigTitsWood”
“BigBreasts”
“BigBreastsWood”
Ok, I seriously can’t think of a name for my forum.
Grandiloquence Ledger
Jesus. No boob stuff. I beg you.
“Cheese Platter Pasta”
Why do you hate America?
…the fact that no one takes my advice seriously…
Jesus. No boob stuff. I beg you.
Ok, I seriously can’t think of a name for my forum. I was thinking of doing some take on “BigSomething” but I just can’t think of anything funny. I may just go with “Forum”. Yawn.
Snakepit. You’re welcome.
My reply
Fucking NICE. Well put.
The GOPs latest dumb idea
Or you could go with something that has a biblical ring to it–
Den of Vipers.
Fucking NICE. Well put.
Thanks. I’m actually thinking that this week’s blogposts should be put into a book.
Maybe I can get Regnery to publish it…
The GOPs latest dumb idea
They’ve had those in Valentine’s Day form for a couple of years…which is just fucking weird.
Ok…how’s this? Some riff on the Algonquin Round Table…but like we’re really dumb. Algonquin Short Table?
For some reason “den of vipers” got me thinking.
The GOPs latest dumb idea
And yet it seems to be a foregone conclusion that they will win seats in November.
Some riff on the Algonquin Round Table
What was the movie they made about that a few years back? Mrs Parker’s Vicious Circle?
Algonquin Short Bus?
The vicious circle jerk kinda makes me laugh.
For some reason “den of vipers” got me thinking.
About a lot of snakes in one place?
About a lot of snakes in one place?
Like a plane?
Talking circle or talking stick. Some tribes have a stick that each speaker holds in turn as they speak in the circle. Just my .02.
Motherfucking snakes.
Feeding a child is one of the most basic parental responsibilities, yet first lady Michelle Obama wishes to liberate parents from this fundamental role by urging them to rely on the public schools to feed their children.
The lunch program dates to 1946. This and the birth announcement prove beyong a doubt that the Obamas have a time machine. I also love the mind-reading “Mrs Obama hasn’t considered…” and Gunlock knows this because…?
the already-wasteful and badly managed school-lunch program
I kept hovering over this text expecting a link to support any of those pulled-from-her-assertions, but GUESS WHAT?!!
OMG some people actually study stuff! Research Mrs Obama might have considered
Some facts: the current subsidy is $2.68(PDF) and according to senator Blanche Lincoln, the performance-based up-to-6 cent increase in the bill will be the first increase since 1973. The bill also seeks to improve nutrition, reduce the administrative burden on individual schools, and improve program integrity link
Schools are not required to participate, nor are eligible students at a participating school, and parents are still liberated enough to pack lunches, pretty much all all that changes for the kids is that more of the poor ones will be eligible to choose subsidized meals and the meals provided will be better for them. Which leaves her complaining about… what, exactly?
I may just go with “Forum”. Yawn.
Venthouse Forum.
I like Algonquin Kiddie Table.
Hey, the juices are flowing now. Thanks for humoring and offering up some suggestions.
Some tribes have a stick that each speaker holds in turn as they speak in the circle.
Especially if you dial a 1-900 number.
I like Algonquin Kiddie Table.
Oooh, so do I!
77—-FUCK ME!!! I was JUST thinking that! Get out of my head!! Also: love it.
Sirius…I love that.
Favorite Parker quote: After attending the Yale-Harvard football game, someone asked her what she thought of it. She said: “If every girl there were laid end-to-end, I wouldn’t be at all surprised.”
I think kiddie table is def FTW
BTW, I hope if you all get a free moment and a wild hair up your butt you’ll all come by, register and chat awhile.
The lunch program dates to 1946.
Obviously this twit has no idea about why most of the government food aid programs came into being in the first place; if she did, she’d probably approve of them, because it wasn’t so much because of the warm fuzzies everyone got from the idea that kids wouldn’t go hungry. It was because so many young men who tried to enter the military in WWII had to be rejected due to poor health caused by poor nutrition in their youth – during the Great Depression.
The government – meaning our elected representatives – reached the entirely rational and sane conclusion that proper nutrition for the populace is a national security issue.
And not to put too fine of a point on it, but the folks the wingnuts count on to fight their wars – the poor – are disproportionately the ones who are getting poor nutrition.
It was because so many young men who tried to enter the military in WWII had to be rejected due to poor health caused by poor nutrition in their youth – during the Great Depression.
Oh, lookee here!
Has anyone yet suggested feeding the kiddies illegal immigrants? Two birds and all that.
a wild hair up your butt you’ll all come by, register and chat awhile.
I’ll be a bit busy with that wild hair…
Has anyone yet suggested feeding the kiddies illegal immigrants?
I’m sure the death panels are part of an integrated plan for supplying our food needs.
Has anyone yet suggested feeding the kiddies illegal immigrants? Two birds and all that.
A Modest Proposal hardly seems like satire these days.
Everyone knows, gravy’s for potatoes and foreplay.
Fuck The Fucking Yankees.
Fuck The Fucking Yankees.
Everybody hates them. I have absolutely no knowledge or experience with baseball (hell, I only learned the rules last week) but even I’ve noticed. Why is this?
Why is this?
Envy (that’s sure to stir up some shit.)
Why is this?
Historically, the Yankees have bought championships.
It was only in the 70s they could start being honest about it.
Think of them as right wing libertarians and you’ll see why they are hated.
What’s the gravy for? I never understood that dish. You ruin a perfectly good biscuit, one you could be dipping in olive oil, with gravy.
Everyone knows, gravy’s for potatoes and foreplay.
You put oil on your biscuit and gravy on your tart? Seems backwards.
Everybody hates them. I have absolutely no knowledge or experience with baseball (hell, I only learned the rules last week) but even I’ve noticed. Why is this?
Like Actor said, they aren’t interested in developing talent, they let other teams do that, and then buy the players away from them. The downside of not having a salary cap.
They are also much like the Lakers and the fucking Dallas Cowboys, in that about 70% of their fans are bandwagon dumbasses that default to those teams because they don’t know any better and they see a lot of trailer park types wearing their fucking gear around.
You put oil on your biscuit and gravy on your tart?
Is that what you’re calling it?
They are also much like the Lakers and the fucking Dallas Cowboys, in that about 70% of their fans are bandwagon dumbasses that default to those teams because they don’t know any better and they see a lot of trailer park types wearing their fucking gear around.
My analogy is MicroSoft, and for the same reasons, but yours is better.
So basically everything that’s good about them, they scavenge from other teams. I see the problem…
Everybody hates them.
Not everybody, their true home fans are very loyal–which is fine. Mostly what infuriates me is here in Mariner country, I don’t much like seeing some douchbag fuckface wearing Yankees or Red Sox gear around. This is the AL West–we don’t like the East.
Did Julie actually read MO’s op-ed piece? Or does she just use that page of the Washington Post as a napkin?
Like Actor said, they aren’t interested in developing talent, they let other teams do that, and then buy the players away from them. The downside of not having a salary cap.
Like I said, envy. Other teams wouldn’t mind if they too could spend like George did, they only mind cuz they can’t.
they scavenge from other teams
Alex Rodriquez. One of a few reasons (Griffey Jr., Jay Buhner, John Olerud, Mike Cameron, Lou Pinella, Randy Johnson) that I became such a diehard Mariners fan.
He’s inarguably one of the best players in the game, notwithstanding his chronic douchery problem, and he is now a Yankee.
Other teams wouldn’t mind if they too could spend like George did, they only mind cuz they can’t.
Much like the Republicans of this nation defend the rich for not helping the poor, we wouldn’t care what, um, well, he’s dead now, but, George spent if at least some of it went to making other teams more competitive.
After all, what’s the point of winning championships if you are the only team consistently able to do so? The idea is to beat the competition, not make it so its all your pot of gold. It’s a game, it’s not war.
Like I said, envy. Other teams wouldn’t mind if they too could spend like George did, they only mind cuz they can’t.
NO! Baseball fans are different from other fans. There’s a geeky aspect to it, with a statistic for everything. But most baseball fans have a strong devotion to the minor league development process and wait eagerly to see new talent show up. We don’t much like going out and buying people like Cliff Lee and then selling him off in 6 months–GRRRR. That whole business aspect and all of the behind the scenes moving and shaking angers us.
That whole business aspect and all of the behind the scenes moving and shaking angers us.
In a nutshell, Steinbrenner and the people before him turned a sport into a business.
The Yankees are a wildly successful corporation. They are no longer a sports team. And this has had repercussions way beyond the world of sports to engulf our current attitudes on things as diverse as politics and even race relations.
Besides, nobody likes the rich bully winning everything and making it seem like no matter what you do, he’s going to win. It hasn’t been totally effective, but they do consistently dominate their division. That’s why watching the Red Sox come back from an 0-3 deficit to win the ALCS a few years ago was one of the sweetest things I’ve seen in sports in my whole life.
That’s why watching the Red Sox come back from an 0-3 deficit to win the ALCS a few years ago was one of the sweetest things I’ve seen in sports in my whole life.
Yeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh….almost as fun as watching Buckner flail after a soft ground ball….;-)
That’s why watching the Red Sox come back from an 0-3 deficit to win the ALCS a few years ago was one of the sweetest things I’ve seen in sports in my whole life.
So the sweetest sports thing in your life was made possible by the scuzziness of the Yankees. I’m sure there’s some deep philosophical thing in there but sometimes it’s good to not look so closely.
Ugh. More baseball. Actor and tsam in particular are sounding terribly George Willian and that’s just unbearable. Feh. Even boobies is better than baseball.
POOP. Also.
Even boobies is better than baseball.
Show us your tits, Poopy.
Even boobies is better than baseball.
Depending on the quality of implants, there is occasionally little difference between the two.
OK, since Poopy’s here, let’s get back to food. That’s a topic he should like.
What did you think of Gunlock’s “What A Friend We Have In Cheeses” recipe?
Geez. 3 hour chains of obscure puns about some accidental topic and baseball is frowned upon? I don’t think so.
And boobies? Nobody doesn’t like ’em some boobies. This fact has been proven by science.
Tsam said:
My mother raised me the same way. Good honest food (and she was a good cook), no candy hanging around, and milk or fruit juice to drink. To this day the smell of almost all fast “food” makes my gorge rise.
In other news, I got out of the boat to look at that “recipe.” A brave thing, since I’m on my lunch break… The comments are spectacular. The first one described her recipe as an oil slick atop a bowl of wet curds. YUM!
The first one described her recipe as an oil slick atop a bowl of wet curds.
This might be the most appetizing description I could come up with.
What did you think of Gunlock’s “What A Friend We Have In Cheeses” recipe?
This may be the Western inherent redneckiness in me talking, but I LOVE cheese. Except for that Velveeta stuff which resembles orange poop in my opinion. Having said that, melting cheese with boiling water and pouring it over noodles doesn’t appeal to me.
Didya know that Kim Jong Il isn’t the leader of N. Korea? Seems dad is still the boss.
I don’t think Kim Jong Il has a Yankees hat.
What next, ketchup as a vegetable?
Except for that Velveeta stuff which resembles orange poop
What did poop do to deserve this comparison?
Except for that Velveeta stuff which resembles orange poop in my opinion
Velveeta: the cheese that would not die.
This may be the Western inherent redneckiness in me talking, but I LOVE cheese.
So you’re French?
What did you think of Gunlock’s “What A Friend We Have In Cheeses” recipe?
ZOMFSM! I thought Tintin was going all bitchslappy with the summary but holee fooking Keerist on lightly buttered pan levain toast, she was serious! I’;m going to be sick now.
I don’t think Kim Jong Il has a Yankees hat.
It’s a good thing or I’d punch him in his fucking snotlocker.
So you’re French?
I really don’t like wine–so French-German cuz I like beer with my cheese? I’m a mutt and damn proud of it.
Wait, who said the kids today know how to make change? They only know what the touch screen tells them.
At McDonald’s, they don’t ask me if it’s for here or to go. They just assume that because I didn’t use the drive through, it’s time to start flinging things onto a tray. At Burger King, they do ask — because the computer prompts them to.
As for the large numbers of young men turned away at draft time in the early 1940’s because of malnutrition — lots of underweight young men — I believe a large % of them came from the South. Great Depression, rickets, poverty, etc etc etc.
Truth be told, I make a dish that’s sort of kind of like Gumcock’s cheesey shit. If you squint. It’s riffing on Jacques Pepin’s bow tie pasta with fried eggs and cheese. Try it – you’ll like it.
I reckon some of the stuff I babble about isn’t terribly interesting to some folks…so I don’t begrudge people their sports talk even if it’s not my thang. Sometimes boob talk wears on me, but that’s when I slink quietly away—like the wind!
Truth be told, I make a dish that’s sort of kind of like Gumcock’s cheesey shit. If you squint. It’s riffing on Jacques Pepin’s bow tie pasta with fried eggs and cheese. Try it – you’ll like it.
In a nutshell, Steinbrenner and the people before him turned a sport into a business.
For a good read on this, especially how the Oakland A’s have (sometimes) thrived in spite of having no money, see Michael Lewis’ book Moneyball.
“the already-wasteful and badly managed school-lunch program”
Let’s see.
30.6 million kids eating 180 lunches for a cost of $9.2 billion.
That comes to a “whopping” $1.66 per meal and the total cost amounts to 2/10 of 1% of government spending. The cost of an average meal that someone pays for themselves is $3.24, or about twice as much.
Wingnuts live in a fantasy land where simply invoking phrases like “already-wasteful” and “badly-managed” create a truth where none exist.
I’m not sure which is more disgusting–the bizarre use of pasta water to, um, make a sauce, I guess, or the fact that she thinks blue cheese and brie are appropriate to serve in a pasta dish on their own. (Or really, at all). That just sounds heinous.
Truth be told, I make a dish that’s sort of kind of like Gumcock’s cheesey shit.
I think it’s called “mac & cheese” but I could be wrong. I mean, it’s not a novel concept. Altho Pepin’s does sound pretty good.
Truth be told, I make a dish that’s sort of kind of like Gumcock’s cheesey shit. If you squint. It’s riffing on Jacques Pepin’s bow tie pasta with fried eggs and cheese. Try it – you’ll like it.
It’s like pasta carbonara for lazy people!
But it needs pancetta.
Btw, here’s the link to my forum: http://bethspencerdigitalartist.com/forum/
No categories for food and sports yet but they’re definitely coming.
I’m not sure which is more disgusting–the bizarre use of pasta water to, um, make a sauce, […]
Non! Au contraire! I always reserve some pasta water to temper the sauce. Pasta should be about the pasta. The sauce is a condiment, not the start. Watch Mario Batali sometime. But then, you don’t even eat the stuff so why am I bothering?
Non! Au contraire! I always reserve some pasta water to temper the sauce. Pasta should be about the pasta. The sauce is a condiment, not the start. Watch Mario Batali sometime. But then, you don’t even eat the stuff so why am I bothering?
No, I totally agree. Just not in this case.
BTW, pasta water from gluten-free pasta just doesn’t have the same effect…
Last century the American South was much more drastically a 3rd world hellhole than it is now.
The Poverty Diet helped a great deal. It has been calculated that the average mill worker in the 1920s had so little money with which to buy food (or the company scrip in which they were indebted to shitty, overcharging company stores) that parents who were mill workers had to literally sacrifice their daily necessary caloric intake so that their kids would get enough to eat.
Such nutrient and caloric starvation led to the ‘lazy Southerner’ stereotype, when actually huge numbers were just falling down weak.
It’s not too surprising that the South now overdoses daily on the foods which 70 years or so ago would have been so rich as to power an entire day’s work with calories and nutrients.
But now it’s not scarcity that’s killing people, it’s overconsumption from an inability to deal with overabundance, the lack of the physical labor which used to be so common, and the presence of super-easy prepared, processed foods.
That gawd-awful recipe reminds me of those “Posh Nosh” satirical sketches from the BBC. A snobbish cow who knows very little about cooking (seriously? BOIL the garlic?) and makes her recipes needlessly complicated to make it appear as though she does. Hell, it’s fucking macaroni and cheese, fer chrissakes.
Ahem. She? [Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course.]
Wishful thinking, Tintin: we all know how much Pupi loves the ladies.
Er, um, by ‘she’ I meant the Gumcock thang. Sorry gurlfriend.
“What A Friend We Have In Cheeses”
Actor, that was fucking funny.
And I always save a cup of the water I boil potatoes in for the pan gravy.
And I always save a cup of the water I boil potatoes in for the pan gravy.
May blessings be upon you.
This is the kind of blinkered thinking you get from these Repub types–they’re so isolated in their CupcakeLand bubble that they simply can’t imagine that other people don’t have the same sheltered and comfortable lifestyle they themselves enjoy.
Bet she also subscribes to that George Bernard Shaw comment about the attitude of the elites: “Poverty isn’t a crime, but it ought to be.”
Well I see there’s a new thread so it’s clearly time for me to jump in here to write a comment nobody will read. I think it’s worth pointing out that the poor families whose children are being run out of the cafeteria (if Ms. Gunlick had her way) are usually single parent and that parent either is working two or more jobs to get by or can’t find a job and in any case can’t afford and probably don’t understand nutritionally complete shopping and food preparation. Broad brush, yes, but I think it’s supported by the studies.
So of course what better idea than to throw their children out of the one opportunity they might have to actually eat well (or at all) in a day…and that only 9 months out of the year.
Everybody hates them. I have absolutely no knowledge or experience with baseball (hell, I only learned the rules last week) but even I’ve noticed. Why is this?
I was referring to people from the North, and their ignorance of the biscuiting and gravying arts.
Ahem. She? [Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course.]
Julie’s a dude????
Well I see there’s a new thread so it’s clearly time for me to jump in here to write a comment nobody will read.
I’ve read your comments, it’s probably better this way.
it’s probably better this way.
Ow.
And I was going to congratulate you on your successful churgury and all. Bastart.
The fucker will rue the day!
Also, “Emile Gorgon Zola” is a pseudonym.
And I was going to congratulate you on your successful churgury and all. Bastart.
Aw, thanks! And thanks for the churgury notation.
There really isn’t any convincing evidence that soy phytoestrogens have the effects that people fear. And heavily processed soy products don’t tend to retain the phytoestrogens anyway.
Most of the eastern part of Asia has been feeding their kids processed and unprocessed soy foods for hundreds of years, and it doesn’t appear to have hurt them any or feminized their boys.
Yeah, I’d expect persistent fertility issues in China, Korea, Japan, Indonesia…for the last several thousand years if soy phytoestrogens caused the problems they’re said to cause. Clearly, not so much with that.
The cancer/fructose thing is interesting though. Although it makes me D-: really hard to think of a diet in which fruit was considered bad for you.
it doesn’t appear to have hurt them any or feminized their boys.
Clearly you never saw “M. Butterfly”…
Although it makes me D-: really hard to think of a diet in which fruit was considered bad for you.
the study addressed that, actually. Let me see if I can dig up the study.
OK, this is the report on the study
Needless to say, the corn lobby says it’s not their fault.
Darn, I can’t find the article that talked about fruit being less of a factor. I think it had something to do with the concentration in candy and soda v. fruit, that the body would ingest less fructose in a diet high in fruit. Fiber, I think.
El Cid linked a fructose/cancer study somewhere in the middle of the thread.
This over-fed little bint needs to spend a couple of weeks working in the inner-city grade school I once taught at. Stupid, thoughtless, uncaring bitch needs to see real poverty – up close, personal, and young. I am very close to assigning her the dreaded C-word because she deserves it.
And just for the record, before the inevitable racist crap dribbles from her fat lips, it was an all-white grade school.
for the last several thousand years if soy phytoestrogens caused the problems they’re said to cause. Clearly, not so much with that.
Well, they could have genetic mutations that allow them to deal with phytoestrogens differently than people who haven’t been eating soy for thousands of years. “Asian flush” — the way that some Asian people turn bright red after having even a bit of alcohol — is related to a mutation that makes it easier to digest rice.
WHY in HOLY HELL are we still subsidizing tobacco?? What the fucking fuck?
what can I say? Ms. Gumlock is cunt. and not just a cunt, a runny, whore cunt. Even then, I owe an apology to whores, cunts and stds.
Perhaps her cuntyness is explained by that godawful nasty crap recipe she provided. Brie mixed with blue? What fresh hell is this? The blue should served on toasted bread with a smattering of fig preserve, the pasta should be tossed with 3 tbs melted butter and half a cup of romano, 6 chiffonaded basil leaves, 2 tsp of black pepper and olives, you tow headed Philistine! Save the brie to top some baked eggs.
But truly, what a horror of a human being.
You really make it seem so easy along with your presentation however
I to find this topic to be actually something that I think I’d never understand. It kind of feels too complex and extremely vast for me. I’m
taking a look forward in your next submit, I’ll try to get the hold of it!