Not to nitpick Bruce*, but shouldn’t that be “PERCEIVED tax bias” or “PERCEIVED TAX BIAS”? It’s not like it’s not a real tax.

*Mostly because it brings up an image of me delousing him, chimp-style, and I haven’t started drinking yet.

Wait a minute… Is this a Conservative, complaining about an effective Tax Cut? That would apply to his demographic? How can this be?!?

Is this a Conservative, complaining about an effective Tax Cut?

Oh, it’s even better than that. It’s a conservative complaining about a decision made by a company. I thought corporate affairs were sacrosanct, Bruce? Do you want the government nosing around in Google’s business? Communist.

Fred Hiatt and company are busy trying to regain teh respect of conservatwits.
~

OR THEIR SEX TOYS??????

Why is everybody so judgey? Damn.

*Mostly because it brings up an image of me delousing him, chimp-style, and I haven’t started drinking yet

You haven’t started drinking yet?! What the hell kind of patriot are you???

God Bless America! In honor of the occasion, I have been patriotically drinking all morning. I’ll try not to blow my arm off like that jackass in New York.

Why, I’m almost feeling patriotic enough to enroll at Glenn Beck U.

What the hell kind of patriot are you???

I finished the TV stand base before I left for Scotland, now I’m working on the upper DVD shelves. I’m a sawdust-covered patriot.

Basically it ends, Bruce, when you set yourself on fire.

I eagerly await Jeffrey Goldberg’s explanation of why use of this phrase makes you, like, totally a diaper baby who hasn’t been trained to POOP in the proper POOP receptacle.

And if he ever gets relocation benefits — although the mind boggles that anyone would want to pay to relocate Bruce

Hey, “far away” is a location, right?

Edroso posted on this, too, making the point that if these guys were honest this is exactly the sort of solution they typically love: the free market addresses a social issue without any government intervention. It’s what they say would have happened with segregation, and that it would have been so much better and more fair than the government forcing people to treat people equally, and yet when it actually happens they rail against it.

Yank my Doodle- It’s a Dandy! (actual pr0n flick title from back in the day)

I do believe that, should you look up the term “Useful Idiot” in the dictionary, you will find Bruce’s picture.

…if these guys were honest this is exactly the sort of solution they typically love: the free market addresses a social issue without any government intervention.

Oh, they still love it – because now it’s another excuse for butthurt.

I do believe that, should you look up the term “Useful Idiot” in the dictionary, you will find Bruce’s picture.

Well, near by anyway, next to “Useless Idiot.”

Oh, they still love it – because now it’s another excuse for butthurt.

Theme song for the next Rebuttlican convention.

Today we celebrate Washington’s victory over Sun Tzu winning our independence from China.

I dunno. I think this is a more appropriate Rebuttlican theme song, though it’s way cooler than they warrant.

I finished the TV stand base before I left for Scotland now I’m working on the upper DVD shelves. I’m a sawdust-covered patriot.

Is that going a little better now?

Sign me up as completely opposed to this.

Gay Guy Goes Galt on Google!

Please note that Google employees are now getting paid on TAX LAW and PERCEIVED TAX bias; not getting paid according to his/her abilities.

I guess he’s trying to play the old Affirmative Action blues here but he seems to assume that str8 married people have more “abilities” than non-married people regardless of gender.

Shall I get paid more because I have three dogs to support?

You mean he’s single? Well, knock me over with a ragged and sticky copy of Playgirl!

Where does this madness end?

Federally mandated Equal Marriage Rights. Oh no, that would mean more sticky gubbermint fondling our nation’s precious private enterprises!

Here’s hoping every computer company and ISP adopts a similarly swoon-inducing policy so this fuckhead has no way to access the internets without aiding and abetting this terrible affront to our country’s fucked up attitude to gays and lesbians.

Is that going a little better now?

Mrs. __B is at work and we’re supposed to go see Toy Story 3 in a couple of hours. I’m searching for a hardware store open today because (a) I need another fucking drill bit or two and (b) I’m running low on bronze nuts and washers.

About 80% done, I’ll be there in two more fucking-around days or one real day.

How shall we know when Brucie sets himself on fire? The flames change color, maybe?

if these guys were honest they’d run to a headshrinker and ask “why do I hate myself so much?”

Gay people get EVERYTHING!!!!

my mother is Canadian so i burnt my finger with a match protesting the loss of my Food Lion key chain discount-thingy. i refuse to blame myself for their shotty design.

Oh, it’s even better than that. It’s a conservative complaining about a decision made by a company. I thought corporate affairs were sacrosanct, Bruce? Do you want the government nosing around in Google’s business? Communist.

Oh snap.

How shall we know when Brucie sets himself on fire? The flames change color, maybe?

The sizzling and fat-spitting when the flames hit his chins are really going to be something.

Basically it ends, Bruce, when you set yourself on fire.

That’s mean. You’re fired.

paramedicx, if you have an iPhone look into CardStar. Then you can save your self immolation for more important things, like removing DK’s mom’s cooties.

This blog post makes me wonder if the Gay Patriot’s going to wake up in 20 years and realize he was straight all along. Like, when he was a kid, some Republican once called him “a gaywad” and he never questioned that a guy like that might be wrong. (A crank call by a neighbor kid doing a Ronald Reagan impersonation, I’m envisioning?)

Major League Soccer should offer a tax gross-up to encourage more high paid international players to come to the US. A Messi/Kaka gross-up.

if these guys were honest this is exactly the sort of solution they typically love: the free market addresses a social issue without any government intervention.

Tellarites do not argue for reasons; they simply argue.

Is this a Conservative, complaining about an effective Tax Cut?

Oh, it’s even better than that. It’s a conservative complaining about a decision made by a company.

I think these are not so much contradictions / hypocrisy as an illustration of priorities. Hatred of teh ghey, at least in Ghey Patriot’s case, outranks libertarian twaddle.

Oh, and happy Failure of Teh Librul War On Patriotizm Day, everybody.

A Messi/Kaka gross-up.

Add a goalie and get a Messi-Kaka-Butt gross-up.

I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is called a disgrace, two are called a law firm, and three or more (but not many more) are called Log Cabin Republicans. And God help me, I have had THESE Log Cabin Republicans.

A wingnut calling a tax-cut “madness” … right after Michael Steele calling the war in Afghanistan “a mistake” … WTF?

Happy 4th Of July, Bizarro America!

Ha-ho! Keep pickin’ on Calculus!

Let’s face it, buying gold is really kind of a pointless exercise.

If only Gay Ratpeeot had bothered to read the FUCKING CONTEXT:

Joining a fledgling group of companies trying to address the disparity in how workplace health benefits for same-sex and heterosexual married couples are taxed, Google said Thursday it would compensate its gay and lesbian employees for the extra money they currently must pay the federal government each year.

In other words, equal treatment under the law, bitchez!

I’m a sawdust-covered patriot.

Needed a toothpick and all you had lying around was a 2×4, huh?

Edroso posted on this, too, making the point that if these guys were honest this is exactly the sort of solution they typically love: the free market addresses a social issue without any government intervention. It’s what they say would have happened with segregation, and that it would have been so much better and more fair than the government forcing people to treat people equally, and yet when it actually happens they rail against it.

That’s because like with everything a Republican claims they believe, it is a blatant lie. The Republican Beliefs (no matter the branch, Libertarian, “Christian”, Business) are simple, hatred of minorities, hatred of change, hatred of equality.

They claim to have all these deep beliefs that are supposedly why they vote the way they do, but every time one tries to accommodate their arguments or supposed “beliefs”, the Republicans will instantly spin around and reveal themselves. If it’s something like this which is an excuse to try and claim they don’t just hate black people, they respond angrily to the idea and reveal that they will abandon their illusionary “principles” if it means sticking it to a minority group.

And if the accommodation hurts minority groups, they’ll just shift to a new goalpost that means they can never support progress or equality. Oh, you are willing to compromise and settle for Civil Unions? Nope, those are just as against our beliefs because we totally only care about the word marriage…oh shit, I mean, uh, civil unions are something something, this isn’t about hate and enforcing second-class citizenship.

In short, never believe anything a Republican tells you. Ever. If they say the sky is blue, check.

Shameless blogwhore: I’ve put up a very special July 4th post (as Tbogg noted, like that “extra-special episode of Blossom, not the one where she gets her first period but the other one”) which is pretty damn good if I say so myself. Readers appreciated.

Isn’t today the day we celebrate Jesus writing the Constitution?

Add a goalie and get a Messi-Kaka-Butt gross-up.

That is even better than the prospect of Rudy Gay, Kevin Love and Ramon Sessions playing on the same team. And by team, I mean, “team”.

no silly, today is the day we shoot bottle rockets and scare vets with PTSD. oh, and tax breaks for MLS mercenaries sounds like a wonderful idea, but only players under 25. no more grampa beckhams.

That is even better than the prospect of Rudy Gay, Kevin Love and Ramon Sessions playing on the same team. And by team, I mean, “team”.

A couple years ago I watched a minor league (ECHL) hockey team that had a forward line of Clapton, Page and Hendricks. I know Hendrix is spelled wrong and there’s no veiled anything there but I found it amusing.

Dammit!! NYMFAIL!!!

Why, I’m almost feeling patriotic enough to enroll at Glenn Beck U.

Just a heads up: Glenn Beck University’s PayPal account does not accept gold.

More or less OT (more than less) I was bouncing around the webzez when I hopped from Roy’s place (with the quotomatic selector quote) in one tab to see this in another.

The good news is, it seems the commenters are educating Bruce on his idiocy – I approve.

Here’s the most surreal thing you’ll read today; the 1956 Republican Party platform:

The purpose of the Republican Party is to establish and maintain a peaceful world and build at home a dynamic prosperity in which every citizen fairly shares.

We shall ever build anew, that our children and their children, without distinction because of race, creed or color, may know the blessings of our free land.
…
We are proud of and shall continue our far-reaching and sound advances in matters of basic human needs—expansion of social security—broadened coverage in unemployment insurance —improved housing—and better health protection for all our people. We are determined that our government remain warmly responsive to the urgent social and economic problems of our people.
…
In four years we have achieved the highest economic level with the most widely shared benefits that the world has ever seen. We of the Republican Party have fostered this prosperity and are dedicated to its expansion and to the preservation of the climate in which it has thrived.
…
The Republican Party supports an immigration policy which is in keeping with the traditions of America in providing a haven for oppressed peoples, and which is based on equality of treatment, freedom from implications of discrimination between racial, nationality and religious groups, and flexible enough to conform to changing needs and conditions.
…
We support this and his further offer of United States participation in an international fund for economic development financed from the savings brought by true disarmament. We approve his determined resistance to disarmament without effective inspection.
…
We shall continue vigorously to support the United Nations.
…
We recommend to Congress the submission of a constitutional amendment providing equal rights for men and women.
…
This Republican Administration sponsored the Refugee Relief Act to provide asylum for thousands of refugees, expellees and displaced persons, and undertook in the face of Democrat opposition to correct the inequities in existing law and to bring our immigration policies in line with the dynamic needs of the country and principles of equity and justice.
…
One of the brightest areas of achievement and progress under the Eisenhower Administration has been in resource conservation and development and in sound, long-range public works programing.

Policies of sound conservation and wise development—originally advanced half a century ago under that preeminent Republican conservation team of President Theodore Roosevelt and Gifford Pinchot and amplified by succeeding Republican Administrations—have been pursued by the Eisenhower Administration. While meeting the essential development needs of the people, this Administration has conserved and safeguarded our natural resources for the greatest good of all, now and in the future.

AG: Sure. Those were the days before the GOP started co-opting the Southern bigots.

In a way, the Tea Partiers combine the best of both Republican worlds: the stupid, misdirected anger of Joe McCarthy’s followers with the bigotry of the “Southern Strategy” converts.

Hell, that sounds better than the current Democratic platform.

Somebody make these poor Gay Republicans straight already. I can’t bear their suffering any longer.

Somebody make these poor Gay Republicans straight already.

Sometimes I wonder if these guys, in the course of interacting with other (straight) Republicans, ever get asked stuff like “But have you really tried dating girls?” And if so, how do they deal with the annoyance?

what $45,000 per year from the Post isn’t enough for you? elitist.

Sometimes I wonder if these guys, in the course of interacting with other (straight) Republicans, ever get asked stuff like “But have you really tried dating girls?” And if so, how do they deal with the annoyance?

It’s more likely they get told “it was totally accidental that I fell open-mouthed on your dick while you were sleeping” or “don’t tell anyone, pleeeeeease!”

Well, that painting behind Gay Patri-twat finally solves the mystery of why ol’ Ronnie Reagan waited until almost the end of his second term before he said anything at all about the AIDS crisis… he was too busy picking out his rainbow tie.

Needed a toothpick and all you had lying around was a 2×4, huh?

I saw that Warner Bros cartoon, too. Was it Popeye?

Perceived tax bias? Because it’s like three grand or more in taxes that a gay person has to pay for their spouse that a federally-recognized married person doesn’t have to pay.

It’s a huge fucking amount in taxes. We pay $9K for health insurance for two… And then $3K to the feds. WTF.

That man has an enticingly large forehead.

he was too busy picking out his rainbow tie.

Note also the non-stars-&-stripes rainbow lapel pin. Where is that man’s PATRIOTISM??!

The purpose of the Republican Party is to establish and maintain a peaceful world and build at home a dynamic prosperity in which every citizen fairly shares.

Obviously a blatant fabrication planted by Liberal Fascist ACORN disinfo agents to discredit the ideology of America’s founders. Check the kerning.

ON TOPIC(!):

Every now and then, a regular American, who has fought the good fight to keep our nation’s moral fiber intact, emerges into the spotlight. Meet Yvonne Moore – a Washington, DC woman who sued her church because they began to perform gay marriages. She asked the church for $250,000 in donations she’d made over the past 37 years. That’s a lot of loose change in that basket.

And video.

“$250,000 in donations she’d made over the past 37 years”

Even factoring in leap years, that’s $130 each Sunday for 1933 Sundays- that’s a LOT of loose change.

Wait, why should she get back the money for all the years they agreed with her bigotry?

The purpose of the Republican Party is to establish and maintain a peaceful world and build at home a dynamic prosperity in which every citizen fairly shares.

GAY.

Yvonne Moore

Don’t we all?

I was going to make a joke involving Andy “I fail Con law forever” Schlafly and “ConservaSearch,” but it appears that the wingnuts are way ahead of me on this one. It doesn’t appear that they do any filtering of the results, however, so I suppose there’s still a niche for truthy search results that are free of liberal, err, taint.

Ronald Reagan in a rainbow speedo.

That is so fucking hot.

Yummmm.

Palin’s foreign policy: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/07/04/sarah-palins-foreign-poli_n_632808.html#comments

We need a bigger navy in case Prussia tries to seize Southwest Africa!

“…Shall I get paid more because I have three dogs to support?”

He “supports” dogs? Why doesn’t he make the lazy slobs get a job?

He “supports” dogs? Why doesn’t he make the lazy slobs get a job?

Is that what he meant? I thought he wanted more pay because of his dog-juggling prowess.

I’m waiting for the shareholder lawsuit against google management for failing to maximize shareholder value by overpaying the icky gays or something.

Maybe we can have another scopes out of it.

I think Tigris is winning this thread.

Adams, you piece of shit, why am I not surprised?

a Washington, DC woman who sued her church because they began to perform gay marriages.

Yeah. Good luck with that.

P.S. God just told us you’re going to Hell.

The flip side to what Google is doing here are all of the corporations who claw back their employees’ income tax savings after a tax cut by reducing the employees’ annual increase for the next several years (applies to working slobs only and not upper management types who would just go Galt).

Christ, what an asshole!

Wahoo!

I bet I blew up more shit than you did tonight!!

Makes me proud!

God bless the USA!!

So, the standard for payment now is to each according to their ability, huh?

Sounds familiar. Can’t quite place it though…

I bet I blew up more shit than you did tonight!!

Some guys on the roof of a 4-story building across the street from me thought it was clever to launch bottle rockets at the high-rise I live in. Retaliation came from a bunch of windows in the form of firecrackers and, from what I could see, garbage.

People who don’t grasp the concept of gravity should not engage in artillery battles.

People who don’t grasp the concept of gravity should not engage in artillery battles.

I’m guessing that could also read people who consume large quantities of alcohol should not engage in artillary battles.

I’m guessing that could also read people who consume large quantities of alcohol should not engage in artillary battles.

Sure, but that was probably true of everyone involved. I know that last year I saw one of my upstairs neighbors with a big slingshot on 2nd or 3rd and when I asked what it was for he said “Launching shit out the window during the fireworks.”

Breitblart is on the case and now Big Peace is here… oh, wait. There may be a problem here.

The site is pro-freedom, pro-liberty, and pro-American but will not be an outlet for false information or propaganda. The unique mix of Schweizer, Gaffney, and Blackfive and our collective reputations will provide a check and balance.

For some reason this bring to mind Monty Python and the line “I’m starting a war for peace”.

The site is pro-freedom, pro-liberty, and pro-American but will not be an outlet for false information or propaganda

My gradually-receding hangover may be the reason, but doesn’t that sentence imply that some, or maybe most, pro-f, pro-l, pro-A sites ARE outlets for false info and propaganda?

Holy schweizer… actually, Sirius, couldn’t read get beyond this:

Frank Gaffney’s “Keeper of the Flame” Award Dinner

I suppose Breitbart was invited from having been Drudge’s sidekick for years so well justified obviously.

In other news, Fred Hiatt has a sad that freedom bombs these days aren’t freedomy enough, while K-Lo celebrates consent of the governed by erasing (at least) 2200 years of democracy from history.

Come join us at http://www..bigstupid.info!!

An anti-slavery, anti-ignorance, and anti-anti-American site.

What are you? Stupid?

Guess what?

what?
Chickens butt!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

So are we!

Via K-Lo:

What they created had never before existed in human history: consent of the governed.

Consent of the owned was still considered kinky.

On Big Peace:

When I told American artist Steve Penley, a close friend, about the idea of Big Peace, he was so excited that he offered his brilliant talent to create the banner artwork. I think that it conveys better than my words what this site is all about. Reagan put it best: Peace through strength.

OMFG WHERE IS GAVIN?

I’d love to go back in time and show that pic to Ronnie, but there’s a chance that he wouldn’t have a heart attack and would instead try to bring some truly oppressive measures into law, and the last time I tried to replace him with a robot double it… didn’t turn out well.

*sigh*
Another 4th without my favorite noisemakers. I miss having a garage and welding bottles.

The bigstupid link no workee.

In the global battle between God and post-modernism, Steve Penley has chosen to side God. It is reflected in his art.

I wonder when Breitbart will roll out Big Theory.

People who don’t grasp the concept of gravity should not engage in artillery battles.

Clearly, he never read Sun Tzu’s treatise on keeping the higher ground. Or thought out a castle’s walls. Or saw Stars Wars III. Or read any history.

I keep a supply of empty beer bottles around on the Fourth for just such purposes.

A couple years ago I watched a minor league (ECHL) hockey team that had a forward line of Clapton, Page and Hendricks.

I kept hoping in the waning moments of their World Cup disaster, England would trot out strikers Aaron Lennon and George McCartney….

Sure warms my heart to see Breitbart continue whoring away at his Big Apeshit™ franchise yet again … because the more his bullet-headed minions spend on his & his sponsors’ scamcraft, the less they have left for ammo.

It’s a mound of steaming turds, but with a silver lining!

Reagan put it best: Peace through strength.

“At least we’re pretty sure it was Reagan … may have been Genghis Khan or Heliogabalus, though. Who cares! Close enough for horseshoes & hand-grenades!”

Can’t wait for Big Strength™ .

Clearly, he never read Sun Tzu’s treatise on keeping the higher ground. Or thought out a castle’s walls. Or saw Stars Wars III. Or read any history.

It’s possible their minds were clouded by the climactic battles of LoTR 2 and 3, where the guys with low ground bomb the crap out of the guys with high ground, mostly because the guys with high ground apparently never heard of trebuchets.

It’s possible their minds were clouded by the climactic battles of LoTR 2 and 3, where the guys with low ground bomb the crap out of the guys with high ground, mostly because the guys with high ground apparently never heard of trebuchets.

The guys with the low ground had guys with even higher ground attacking the guys with the high ground, and preventing the trebucheting.

What a suprising article; I had no idea Andy Bernard had come out.

Can’t wait for Big Strength

When are they going to launch Big Abscess?

Can’t wait for Big Strength™ .

I’m in negotiations. Feel me, playah?

The unique mix of Schweizer, Gaffney, and Blackfive and our collective reputations will provide a check and balance.

This should work out well.

Also, they misspelled “piece.”

Also, they misspelled “piece.”

+1

Also, they misspelled “piece.”

Only because they kept giggling at “peece.”

although the mind boggles that anyone would want to pay to relocate Bruce

The Founding Fathers

I’m still waiting for Andy’s entry into gender studies:

BigPENIS and BigVAGINA.

Of course his site dedicated to bringing world piece through sodomy, BigASSHOLE, is having some trouble getting the right kind of content.

Weeeeellll, it’s slow ’round here…so why don’t we take a break from gay patriots and name a creepy “heroine”. I’m having trouble naming the lady in my latest piece. Ideas?

BTW, I’ve found that f you refer to a guy’s wang as “a little gay patriot”, he doesn’t like it as much as you think he would.

I’m having trouble naming the lady in my latest piece. Ideas?

My first thought is “Britney Spears.”

But on further reflection, “Apassionata.”

BTW, I’ve found that f you refer to a guy’s wang as “a little gay patriot”, he doesn’t like it as much as you think he would.

Video or it never happened.

I’m having trouble naming the lady in my latest piece. Ideas?

This might be helpful. Or maybe this.

“Apassionata”

Is that a real name? I kinda like it actually.

Sirius, I don’t click links after “BigASSHOLE” has been mentioned in a thread.

“Apassionata”

Is that a real name? I kinda like it actually.

It’s a riff off an old Jules Feiffer cartoon.

There is an old ghost movie also named “The Uninvited” in which there was a ghost named Carmel, and an early vampire story is “Carmilla,” by Sheridan Le Fanu(online, and worth reading if you haven’t) so maybe something along those lines? I think it calls for something more old-fashioned sounding than Kendall, at least.

Sirius, I don’t click links after “BigASSHOLE” has been mentioned in a thread.

I can’t say as I blame you for that. I am at work at the moment and I assure you that these links are harmless, the ever vigilant Barracuda Web Filter is here to make sure of that.

tigris…agreed. And totally dig your suggestions.

And the links are safe, so don’t worry! They’re lists of Victorian/Edwardian era baby names.

They’re lists of Victorian/Edwardian era baby names.

Jedidiah Jebidiah Springfield?

I saw that. Awesome resource, Sirius.

EEEEEEE!!!! That second link is a freakin’ treasure trove. Not only are they wildly-appropriate, they are some of my favorite names, period. Yay!!!!

Jedidiah Jebidiah Springfield?

Girl names. So yes.

I’ve been doing some genealogy research lately, and two of the more interesting names that turned up were Keturah and Octa. Octa Leoma, actually!

From the second link: Millicent. (1) It somehow fits your painting. (2) Having a woman named “One-hundred-thousandth” appeals to the math geek in me.

OK, here are my faves:

Cordelia
Drucilla
Lucinda
Matilda
Milicent
Winnifred (I actually want to name my future daughter this, but everybody hates it ‘cept for me. I’m seriously obsessed with this name.)

Shall we put it to a vote?

I would guess that “Octa” was someone’s idea of the female analogue to “Octavius.” “Octavia” isn’t bad.

Drucilla and Cordelia both have BTVS connections these days.

Millicent

Great minds…thinkin’ alike.

BTVS

*googles* Oh, this and Jules Feiffer…

*googles*

Mrs. __B has liken my brain to (a) a jukebox and (b) one of Dali’s sculptures with a lot of drawers. Put a quarter in and see what comes out: MAD, BTVS, Monty Python, Roman history, Mets trivia…

*googles*

Mrs. __B has liken my brain to (a) a jukebox and (b) one of Dali’s sculptures with a lot of drawers. Put a quarter in and see what comes out: MAD, BTVS, Monty Python, Roman history, Mets trivia…

I think that’s a fair assessment. The trick is keeping up…

The trick is keeping up…

Or saying that I’m easily distracted by bright shiny things and simply waiting it out.

As prep for Mad Men 4, we’re watching 2 and 3 right now. Despite the show’s rep for scrupulous accuracy, I noticed a mistake: Harry Crane’s glasses have a UV coating that didn’t exist in the early 60s. (When the light’s at the right angle, you can see a purplish tinge to the reflection off his lenses.)

Living with me’s a dream I tells ya.

I love stuff like that, though. It’s oddly interesting.

Winnifred (I actually want to name my future daughter this, but everybody hates it ‘cept for me. I’m seriously obsessed with this name.)

A good friend of mine once dated a girl named Winnifred, she went with the short version Fred. After they split up he started dating a Melinda who was known to evrybody as Mel. After they had been dating for a few months my friend’s father called me from Iowa to ask me if his son was gay.

Anyway, the names that struck me were Preshia and Vertiline.

Winnifred (I actually want to name my future daughter this, but everybody hates it ‘cept for me. I’m seriously obsessed with this name.)

That was my step grandmother’s name, and she rocked, so that gets my vote.

And FYWP. You’re just doing it to spite me now, aren’t you?

Preshia and Vertiline.

They sound like two liqueurs to be avoided.

“A good friend of mine once dated a girl named Winnifred, she went with the short version Fred. After they split up he started dating a Melinda who was known to evrybody as Mel. After they had been dating for a few months my friend’s father called me from Iowa to ask me if his son was gay.”

This story made me chuckle.

“N__B said,
July 5, 2010 at 20:53

Preshia and Vertiline.

They sound like two liqueurs to be avoided.”

Nothing could be worse than Southern Cokfort.

Comfort. iPhone is wonky.

Oh, good, because I was thinking the first sounded like something worth trying…

BigHissyFit.com

Our proudest achievement!!

Nothing could be worse than Southern Cokfort.

Southern Cockrot?

I see the name Thora on that second link and would vote for it because the character sort of resembles a woman I knew who was named, of all things, Thora.

Ahh, Norway. Some day I’ll return.

although the mind boggles that anyone would want to pay to relocate Bruce

As Garfield to Nermal, I would pay to ship that toad to Abu Dhabi.

Sign me up as completely opposed to this. Shall I get paid more because I have three dogs to support?

This is perfectly consistent with the typical gay republican attitude towards other people’s children, actually, just taken a step further.

Why should I have to PAY for OTHER PEOPLE’S PARTNERS? This subsidy is like a REVERSE TAX or ANTI-SUBSIDY on my RIGHT to be a total slut and never be in a relationship lasting longer than four hours*. Or, more to the point, my sordid lifestyle of obsessively checking Facebook in my boxers and not having any sex I didn’t pay for. IS OBAMA GOING TO TAX THAT NOW, TOO!?!

Srsly, look at this guy’s hair. He is so not getting any.

Only someone who is French, gay or both, like myself,

André Bauer?

Is this a Conservative, complaining about an effective Tax Cut? That would apply to his demographic?

What do you mean his demographic? That would be making a massive assumption, that he could actually get a man. You know, outside of a feeliebooth or Republican restroom gloryhole.

Do you want the government nosing around in Google’s business?

Dunno, that sounds kind of hot.

“N__B said,
July 5, 2010 at 21:27

Nothing could be worse than Southern Cokfort.

Southern Cockrot?”

Also known as Jeff Sessions.

Reagan put it best: Peace through strength.
Not to mention “Strength through Joy”.

Where did everybody go?

I like Thora. Sounds like an insectoid planet comics silver age supervillianess.

Thora’s another gooder…though I confess to leaning towards Millicent.

They stunned her, and stripped off her garments, and lastly
They stuffed her inside a kind of a pod;
And then it was that Millicent Frastley
Was sacrificed to The Insect God.

Millicent Frastley.

What an amazing name. Those Ed Gorey bugs are gorgeous and adorable.

This is perfectly consistent with the typical gay republican attitude…

At first I read this as “This is perfectly consistent with the tropical gay republican attitude…”

Edward Gorey’s special list of Victorian children’s names.

Wasn’t one of the women on Barsoom named Thora?

The Creaturette and I decided on ‘Katherine Margaret’, although I was going for goth and teutonic girls names. Katherine will translate to ‘Kitty’ and Margaret has family history on both sides. End of October should be the release date for Katherine, so, ‘Hello, Kitty’!!!

I don’t think you can go wrong with Katherine. It’s always elegant; always classy.

Given Mrs. __B’s Siberian heritage, we’re looking for a Russian name that has an English analogue with a decent nickname. My favorite so far is Andrei, which gives us Andy. Other possibilities are Nikolai -> Nick, and Fyodor -> Teddy. The problem is that once you strip out the heavily biblical names, there’s not a lot left.

I vote for Nikolai. And clearly my opinion matters most, not you or, you know, the woman who gives birth to him.

A few more Russian names with English equivalents and good nicknames: Alexander, George (Yuri or Georgy), Gregory, Michael, Paul (Pavel), Peter, Victor.

Rob – Of those seven names, six have been ruled out because of relatives we don’t wish to honor. It sounds cruel, possibly because it is, but that’s how it goes.

Yuri – the seventh – doesn’t have an English nickname, only a formal name.

But thanks anyway. All help is appreciated.

Snorg, I love that…hey, thanks, S,Ner’s. I gave you and S,N a little plug.

Reagan put it best: Peace through strength.

I believe the fortieth president’s exact words were WAR IS PEACE and IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH.

WAR IS PEACE and IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH.

“I didn’t know half this stuff.”

I gave you and S,N a little plug.
Does it vibrate?

a Russian name that has an English analogue with a decent nickname.
Fuckbum.

Fuckbum.

What’s the nickname?

“Smut Clyde said,
July 6, 2010 at 0:23

I gave you and S,N a little plug.
Does it vibrate?”

Sadly, No.

I say you go with Ivan or Igor. And to hell with making it sound American.

We’re waiting to see if he’s born with a hump before we make a final decision on “Igor.”

A hump can be added later if necessary.

Did Igor Stravinsky have a hump?

N_B, if you want him beaten up a lot (builds character), you could name him Yevgeny and call him Gene.

No one really appreciates fine old names anymore, proper names like “Hatchepsut.” *Sigh*

Those young Northmen, however, they did have nice robust names, didn’t they? And they looked so good rowing their dragon ships upriver, stripped to the waist…

Anyway. Thorvald is always good; or Alfgeir. Auðunar? Frømund? Hælæif? Knute is a classic…

Alfgeir. Auðunar? Frømund? Hælæif?

Used to work w/ a guy whose parents (Both medieval scholars, he claimed.) named him Alcuin.

I think Æthelred has a nice ring to it.

Anyway. Thorvald is always good

Rear Window. Let me show you it.

The fact is, the gay do not deserve special rights, not when Real Americans are in trouble.

Rear Window. Let me show you it.

Lars; Thorvald was his surname.

A Real American.

Gary, I’m sorry, but that’s an awful name suggestion.

The fact is, it’s not really “special” when you can get the same treatment, Gary: you have the freedom to get fisted by the Invisible Hand, too, it’s totally up to you. What a great country!

The fact is, if the hand is invisible, I won’t be able to tell if it violates my strict USA Freedom No Fatties policy.

Did Igor Stravinsky have a hump?

He humped but had none. Igor Sikorsky, on the other hump – er, hand – made thump-a-hump noises all the live long day.

N_B, if you want him beaten up a lot (builds character), you could name him Yevgeny and call him Gene.

My father-in-law. Nice guy, but we’re not naming after either grandfather.

Did Igor Stravinsky have a hump?

Only one. He was a dromedary. The idea of a camel composer is ludicrous.

http://www.ozyandmillie.org/d/20040513.html

Millicent. This was a great web comic. Kind of a Calvin and Hobbes/ Bloom County thing. If you have half a day to kill, do the whole archive.

It is a fantastic web comic. If my invoicing goes to shit tomorrow, I’m blaming you. I just read a year’s worth or so of it, and now I want to read it all. Of course that means I will be really tired tomorrow and make mistakes, and invoicing will go to shit.

Is this the greatest one-two punch ever seen outside Renew America?

http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/mmoriarty/2010/06/30/catholics-vs-communists/

http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/mmoriarty/2010/07/05/progressive-trolling-and-the-real-mcmurphy/

My plan to destroy capitalism finally comes to fruition!

Sharron’s Underground Bunker. Click the figures in the banner, too.

Damnation, Sharron’s Bunker is nothing next to MM’s madness. He & Pope Ratzi against the forces of Satan, Communism & progressive medicine, is it? Bring back the Theory of Humours & Exorcism!

Geez Bruce. Why don’t you cry about it? I’ll bet your mom gets a little extra every paycheck if ya know what I mean and don’t even try to tell me you don’t.

What’s with teh gays hatin’ on the teh gays? Especially over what a private business does? Will no one think of the free markets? Where’s the outrage?

The idea of a camel composer is ludicrous.

Really? And who dem girls you be ridin with when you roll through town?

**sigh

Well, I survived an all out assault from Captain Morgan and a rectal..something from Dr. Pepper. Some of the captain’s cousins showed up to really do some damage as well. I am happy to have made it home in one piece. How was everyone else’s weekend?

tsam,

I practically sleepwalked through the fourth. I got off at 230AM Sat (boring shift) and then I guess didn’t sleep well or got interrupted a lot and was basically a zombie the next day. Went to see the best most expensive hometown fireworks display in America (Alachua, FL… I did my part, we paid $5 to some weird townies just to park) and finally shuffled off to bed some hours later. (Dunno why it was so much later but I’m kind of unclear on what happened when because … zombie.)

Today was a bit better, but depressed about everything. I was doing a bit better after dinner but made the mistake of reading Pharyngula where some pomo ‘tard was tone-trolling what should have been a fairly fun thread. Must slit wrists now.

I’m going to try Alton Brown’s pot roast recipe tomorrow, using a dutch oven because fuck aluminum foil and anyway my oven sucks. The comments said your roast will not succeed if your oven sucks. So dutch oven it is. Wish me luck.

Oh yeah, he calls for raisins. Fuck that, I hate raisins. Suggested substitutions? I have fresh cherries, frozen cranberries, nasty Smuckers apricot jam, a whole orange, some shitty peaches, and some cooked blueberries.

I once knew a lovely young woman named Winnifred; she was known to her friends as Win. Or possibly Winn, but who knows? Anyway, that’s kind of a cool nickname to have.

Also, I hadn’t noticed it at the time, but we gave our son the name of one of the Gashlycrumb Tinies (the one thrown from a sleigh). Yikes.

Bouffant–niiiice. Republicans get odd teevee ads (duz it 2 yew?), we get funny/sarcastic attack websites. I’m liking this t-party thing more and more…

(Is a T party where a bunch of ftms get some illicit testosterone, or is it a bunch of bored, pouty boys in tighty whiteys and rumpled t’s, or is it sex in the men’s room? I guess the last meaning is obsolete, as we just say “Republicans” now.)

or… is it a bunch of nerds riding a charter trolley around Boston???

I once knew a lovely young woman named Winnifred

LIMERICK COMPETITION!!

I once knew a woman named Winnifred
Who was lovely and young and not even dead
She said with a smile
And without any guile
“Don’t believe obits you haven’t read.”

Lars; Thorvald was his surname.

Lars Hitler feels better about himself, now.

Lars Hitler feels better about himself, now.

As he should. After all, he’s good enough, he’s smart enough, and doggone it, people like him.

Well, do you miss Bush?

No, I mean the shitbag ex-president, George Bush the younger.

vote

I miss George Bush Junior like I miss a bad poison ivy rash.

Also, I hadn’t noticed it at the time, but we gave our son the name of one of the Gashlycrumb Tinies (the one thrown from a sleigh). Yikes.

Hey, that’s my cat’s name!

Hey, that’s my cat’s name!

No wonder he looks at you with disdain.

You know that letter I was complaining about transcribing last week? Somehow I didn’t save it and now I need a copy. I am an idiot.

No wonder he looks at you with disdain.

That’s Mr. T&U’s fault. And he still looooooooooooooves him, for some reason.

Ugh. Yeah, I don’t know where it is. And I don’t have the tape anymore. I fail SO HARD at being a secretary.

Never mind. Dude kept a hard copy. WTF?

Anyway, good morning, all. I am bored.

And I don’t have the tape anymore

?

Is your boss one of those guys who talks into his hand, thinking that’s easier than typing the body himself?

That’s Mr. T&U’s fault. And he still looooooooooooooves him, for some reason.

Cats, like chix, love manly smells. Spray some AXE on yourself and watch your cat’s reaction.

Is your boss one of those guys who talks into his hand, thinking that’s easier than typing the body himself?

Oh, he’s not my boss. I’m just covering for my mortal enemy while she’s out of town. But yes, he’s one of those people who still uses dictation. I don’t think he knows how to type.

My boss does pretty much all that stuff herself, and then sends it to me to format and print on her letterhead. Which takes a lot less time overall, I think.

Cats, like chix, love manly smells. Spray some AXE on yourself and watch your cat’s reaction.

I’ll stick with the catnip body wash, thanks.

I don’t know T&U, calling her your mortal enemy seems like a little exaggeration on your part. I mean, seriously if she was a mortal enemy wouldn’t she be trying to kill you every time she saw you? Wouldn’t you do the same to her? She is just a person who is against everything you stand for. So enemy seems appropriate but ‘mortal’ seems a bit much. Unless you really do go at it with daggers drawn every time you meet, which case: Pics or it didn’t happen!

My 4th weekend sucked and continues to suck. Our AC conked out a couple of days ago and I’m sitting here waiting for the AC guy to call, getting warmer and angrier by the minute. It’s in the fucking mid 90’s here.

getting warmer and angrier by the minute

Take some pictures in a mirror. You’ll find them useful as models for art, later.

Oh yeah, he calls for raisins. Fuck that, I hate raisins. Suggested substitutions? I have fresh cherries, frozen cranberries, nasty Smuckers apricot jam, a whole orange, some shitty peaches, and some cooked blueberries.

I don’t think any of that stuff should be in a pot roast…?

I have a cool place you can stay VS =)

Though I do have a few rules about pants I’m particular about…

My 4th weekend sucked and continues to suck. Our AC conked out a couple of days ago and I’m sitting here waiting for the AC guy to call, getting warmer and angrier by the minute. It’s in the fucking mid 90?s here.

Aww–that sucks! We had spotty rain and temperatures between 65 and 70f all weekend. No AC required, but not many underdressed people around.

Hey guys…the AC guys just left. Guess what didn happen. Porn. BUT I do feel like I can breath again. Yay!!

whaddaya mean porn didn’t happen? It’s happening right now! In my head!

Hey guys…the AC guys just left. Guess what didn happen. Porn.

Do you have a pizza delivery later today?

I don’t know T&U, calling her your mortal enemy seems like a little exaggeration on your part. I mean, seriously if she was a mortal enemy wouldn’t she be trying to kill you every time she saw you? Wouldn’t you do the same to her? She is just a person who is against everything you stand for. So enemy seems appropriate but ‘mortal’ seems a bit much.

If it weren’t for laws and customs and protocol and such, I would totally kill her. But I don’t think she has any problem with me…how about “hated enemy”? Or is that redundant?

Nemesis.

Supervillain.

You know what? Normally I do call her my nemesis. I don’t know why I didn’t this morning.

Or just call her your Newman.

Well, do you miss Bush?

“285 people miss him, 2,476 don’t”

Cool — I can watch Bush’s approval rating suck AGAIN!

But the website is dull to me – so I think there need to be incentives. For example, if the “don’ts” get up to 5,000 votes, they get to appoint a delegate to go kick him in the harbls … 50,000 votes entitiles five lucky voters to each get a turn at waterboarding the bastard … & 500,000 votes means a Special Forces team will extract him & rendition his ass to one of his own secret prisons.

Voila! America’s most heartwarming reality-teevee series ever.

Special Forces team will extract him & rendition his ass to one of his own secret prisons.

But HE said not to worry, we don’t do that to US Americans (at least as far as you know). You know what would be super duper cool? If those rendition sites and the entire practice went away under this new president that promised to obey like, laws and stuff.

“entitiles”

Uhhhhhh … the opposite of “exotiles?”

Do you have a pizza delivery later today?

I would, but the last time I ordered pizza, I got slapped with a sexual harassment suit.

whaddaya mean porn didn’t happen? It’s happening right now! In my head!

I guess that’s the beauty(?) of porn–it can happen anytime, as long as your mind is creative and dirty enough.

“exotiles?”

Axolotl.

I would, but the last time I ordered pizza, I got slapped with a sexual harassment suit.

Better than getting slapped with a dildo or stapped with a scott.

I’ve always wanted to slap somebody with a fish.

Just noticed Ronnie’s rainbow tie. Nice touch.

the AC guys just left. Guess what didn happen. Porn.

Guys? Plural? And yet no porn happened?

Sounds like somebody isn’t holding up her end.*

.

.

*Yes, yes, that.

It’s quiet. Too quiet.

“285 people miss him, 2,476 don’t”

Who are these 285 people? How have they not drowned in a bowl of soup yet?

What amuses me about the wemissw site is that it was apparently intended as a pro-Bush (anti-Obama) site but it has been, er, “repurposed.”

couldn’t figure out how to leave a comment, but this says it all, really:

gene from Iowa, United States doesn’t miss W.
He was the most lame and worthless example of a President of my lifetime. Subverting the Constitution is not the duty of the President. A big objection I have is he didn’t take his scofflaw policies with him, and Obama whom I had some hopes for uses them. Stupidity does rub off.

Oh, and it’s a BBQ pot roast. Or something.

the AC guys just left. Guess what didn happen. Porn.

Guys? Plural? And yet no porn happened?

Sounds like somebody isn’t holding up her end.*

.

.

*Yes, yes, that.

Giggity. *chuckle*

What amuses me about the wemissw site is that it was apparently intended as a pro-Bush (anti-Obama) site but it has been, er, “repurposed.”

Eh, I’m not so sure. Look at the tshirts they’re selling. I think they just want to make a buck.

The gun dispenser shirt was sort of clever in a trashy sort of way.

It’s quiet. Too quiet.

Everyone’s traumatized by what you did to them this drunken holiday weekend.

The delusional dead-enders really do think they’re the majority, don’t they? *sigh*

Coming next: BigMajority, bitches!

My mommy says I’m great, and I believe her.

Well, do you miss Bush?

Comics do.

Everyone’s traumatized by what you did to them this drunken holiday weekend.

Oh. Sorry, everyone.

It’s now the sixth of July. And I still can’t get my python boot off.

And I still can’t get my python boot off

Guess it stays through Labor Day!

My mommy says I’m great, and I believe her.

She says I’m great too. Jealous much, bitchez?

Oh. Sorry, everyone.

I kinda enjoyed it.

tsam vs. Andrew Breitbart. I wanna see it right now. Fisticuffs. My money’s on the not-bloated cute guy.

And I still can’t get my python boot off.

Try romantic music and low lights.

Try romantic music and low lights.

OK, that made me laugh.

Palin for GOP party chair battle ongoing.

OK, that made me laugh.

Yeah, but we all know you’re easy.

Yeah, but we all know you’re easy.

Hey!

Palin for GOP party chair.

Oh please, pleeeeese, PLEEEEEEEZE. My birthday isn’t for five moths, but this would be so so nice.

DKW’s Mom said

Hey, I didn’t say you weren’t. Oh, and thanks again for last night. Did you ever get that out of your hair?

Say what you will about Steele. Like, say, for instance that he’s dumb as a box of rocks. Do you really want to add mean as a snake on top of that? I mean dumb AND hateful?! I anxiously await the gaffes!!!

Palin is often accused of being poorly informed and overly defensive. I do not think that is true of her, but it certainly seems to be true of her loyalists. Happily, there is no transitive property of buffoonery.

So: Dump Steele, hire Palin.

Hmmmm…

Hey, I didn’t say you weren’t. Oh, and thanks again for last night. Did you ever get that out of your hair?

Depends on which hair you’re talking about.

tsam vs. Andrew Breitbart. I wanna see it right now. Fisticuffs. My money’s on the not-bloated cute guy.

Name the time and place, cutest cheerleader ever!

And I still can’t get my python boot off.

Pay off your snaking tickets.

Happily, there is no transitive property of buffoonery.

I’m not so sure. Any mathyphilosophimatical types want to weigh in on this?

Happily, there is no transitive property of buffoonery.

I’m not so sure. Any mathyphilosophimatical types want to weigh in on this?

The buffoonery operator is associative and distributive over addition. I will have to work on whether it is transitive.

Suppose GØP is a group. Then…

Suppose GØP is a group.

You have reached the limit of my ability to suspend disbelief.

Oh please, pleeeeese, PLEEEEEEEZE

Ditto from me on that! I have my hands clasped in prayer and gazing toward the heavens.

From the article:

Happily, there is no transitive property of buffoonery.

I would go look in the mirror before betting the farm on that one cupcake.

How much of a buffoon do you have to be to say “I don’t think she’s dumb, but her fans are”? I’m not sure, but to say that she’s smart and they’re all dumb sort of implicates the queen bee in perpetrating the st00pit, wouldn’tcha think?

Palin to replace Steele? That’s like jumping out of the frying pan and into another frying pan, isn’t it?

Suppose GØP is a group.
Surely it is a ring.

I likey:

Lamar Alexander from Tennessee, United States doesn’t miss W.
No one new how to take care of Number 1 better, & screw everyone else. I never got mine, like he promised!

I worked with gay-rights groups for years and could never get my head around gays who voted or god-forbid fundraised for Republican causes and the Republican party. Then a friend of mine said “It all points back to self-hatred” and he was absolutely right. A lot of gays actually don’t like themselves that much (the sad result of being discriminated against your whole life) so why not join a group that actively celebrates your unworthiness.