Mangoes were on sale when I did my weekly shopping yesterday. I stocked up. Aint no fucken way I’m jumping ship. I shall ATTS™©

Also, YAYS! Nu thred! Bless you my son.

John Yoo needs to experience testicle crushing. And such as. Also.

Hat trick! Let’s see how quickly I go before WP crushes my testicles.

Aren’t you posting too fast?

Isn’t writing great?

It’s the PeeJ show!

5

FYWP FYWP

Yoo actually has a highly-elaborated theory in his book The Powers of War and Peace of why the declare war power vested in Congress is not actually the power to decide what military conflicts the United States shall become involved in. Instead, he sees the power to declare war as essentially a legalistic act, recognizing a certain state of international affairs and decreeing the consequences for American citizens and subjects of the enemy.

As best I can tell, it’s not a bad argument, if you subscribe to originalism. I don’t, and think there are good functional reasons to locate the war-making power at the junction of legislative and executive power. However, Yoo isn’t unprincipled or stupid about this issue, and it probably wasn’t accidental that he omitted the reference to Congress’ declare war power, given his view of its scope.

highly-elaborated

the hallmark of stupid theories since at least the year 322AD

National security amounted to an afterthought. He devoted one paragraph each—out of the approximately 110 paragraphs in the speech—to Iraq, Afghanistan, and terrorism. It is as if Lincoln had spent most of his Inaugural Addresses on the transcontinental railroad and the Homestead Act.

Instead, Lincoln talked about a crisis IN HIS COUNTRY. Shocking.

“I DIDN’T NOT VOTE FOR OBAMA FOR THIS!”

However, Yoo isn’t unprincipled or stupid about this issue

Yeah he is. Look at the article.

[Yoo] sees the power to declare war as essentially a legalistic act something that draftdodgers and trustfund babies should be in charge of, recognizing a certain state of concocted international affairs and decreeing the consequences making up causes and effects for American citizens and subjects of the enemy to further line the pockets of themselves and friends.

Uh.. where’d the markup go in the previous post? That’s lame. It was impeccable I swear

[Yoo] sees the power to declare war as essentially a legalistic act something that draftdodgers and trustfund babies should be in charge of, recognizing a certain state of concocted international affairs and decreeing the consequences making up causes and effects for American citizens and subjects of the enemy to further line the pockets of themselves and friends.

[here’s a preemptive FYWP if this doesn’t work a second time]

It looks well-fixxored to me…

FYWP — I give up. I’m going to stick to what I do best: Huffin Glue.

Why this fuck stain isn’t in Gitmo I’ll never understand.

So, you usually write for the Huffin’ Glue Post?

“Huffin’ Glue Post”

I am SO going to steal that…

Yoo is pretty repugnant. I wonder if he would characterize Dubya as a great president, but I’m not getting out of the boat.

Yoo is pretty repugnant.

There ain’t nothing pretty there, bro.

John Marshal was a better class of reactionary than John Yooo.

I doubt Marshall would authorize anyone to crush somebody’s balls, or whatever else might be sticking out and handy to crush. And Marshall’s noblesse oblige would result in a few cake crumbs, and even once in awhile, maybe a even a pint, being thrown my way.

All I could expect from Yoo would be ‘You didn’t expect the Spanish Inquisition!?” and then I would hope I would be let off with water torture and sleep deprivation.

As best I can tell, it’s not a bad argument, if you subscribe to originalism

I don’t know, the original document explicitly locates the power to declare war in Congress, and the founding fathers debated specifically about why to do that and not place it in the executive branch. See here [link from wikipedia is wrong, but this is where they meant; search for “make war”]

Well, we’ve flattened their fingers and we’ve branded their buns… Nothing is working — Bring on the nuns!

The Louisiana Purchase was an unconstitutional plot by a radical crypto-Muslim to destroy and bankrupt America. I demand that we return it to France right away.

We’d still be stuck with Texas and Alaska, however. They’re the prime wingnut breeding grounds at this point, no?

No, but putting New Orleans, which he had illegally purchased, under marshal law and subject to the habeas-denying whim of his own Paul Bremer, James Wilkinson (who was a Spanish double agent, a fact of which Jefferson was well aware), just to satisfy a political vendetta is pretty freakin wingnutty.

It was only with great trepidation that I followed the link to [shudder] The Weekly American Standard, in the quixotic belief that, prior to commenting here on John Yoo’s emissions, one is behooved to first inhale deeply of them, over there. As expected, it was a misguided exercise. My eyes glazed after the second paragraph, and didn’t return to duty until the close, when I could see that deliverance was imminent. Therefore, my impression of the article comes from two sentences, which may be taken as a kind of self-generated shorter for the piece:

To save his presidency, Obama should follow the real lesson of FDR and our other great presidents and turn away from the failures of health care reform and nationalization of the economy. He will be remembered if he follows through in Iraq, pursues al Qaeda with the restoration of aggressive measures, and achieves victory in Afghanistan.

In other words, Obama’s only hope of forestalling his inevitable slide into calumny and dishonor among thieves Administrations, is to abandon all his other initiatives and grasp the nettle of being a war preznit like GWB and LBJ, and then all will be well.

Riiiight.

Who care what he thinks, anyway? He’s a war criminal.

achieves victory in Afghanistan

What the hell does this even mean?

Hey, OT, but anybody in the NY metro area should get their geek on in Brooklyn tomorrow night.

What the hell does this even mean?

Kill ’em all.

anybody in the NY metro area should get their geek on in Brooklyn tomorrow night.

There’s only so much of me to go around, B^4.

Oh.

I’ll have to see – I’ve been sick since Friday.

There’s only so much of me to go around, B^4.

You’re a large man, so Obama’s radical redistribution of N__B shouldn’t pose a problem.

Gotta get that actor guy to show himself- if he shows up and sees his shadow, we’ll have six more weeks of winter.

Now that the executive is all powerful, he (the Preznit, possibly via one of his minions) could decide that Yoo is an enemy of the state. Great justice would ensue. If yoo know what I mean and I think yoo do.

Wow! I hope there’s some informed commentary in Weekly Standard on Yoo’s important argument from sharp minds such as Bill Kristol and John Podhoretz!

I’m with PeeJ, declare Yoo an enemy combatant and have him thrown in Gitmo.

How do the teabaggers square their alleged belief in the constitution with their view that the 4th, 5th, and 6th Amendments don’t apply if the President uses the magic word “terrorism”? I know, I know, logical consistency is elitist and condescending.

How do the teabaggers square their alleged belief in the constitution with their view that the 4th, 5th, and 6th Amendments don’t apply if the President uses the magic word “terrorism”? I know, I know, logical consistency is elitist and condescending.

Those are the gay amendments, along with the part of the First Amendment that prohibits the establishment of religion, because the Founders were all theocrats, so SHUT UP, THAT’S WHY!!

WOLVERINES!!!

Wonder if this guy will cite the Yoo memo?

Another one of Mooselini’s WTF moments was “We must restore constitutional rights.” followed closely by “How dare Obama give the underpants bomber constitutional rights.”

Well, the underpants bomber was blackity-black-black and a muscleman, to boot. Constitutional rights only apply to white male property owners of good WASP extraction.

I would like to see a teabag American citizen arrested abroad just so I can say “Rights Shmights, they aren’t citizens of that country, they have no rights.”

“Well, the underpants bomber was blackity-black-black and a muscleman, to boot. Constitutional rights only apply to white male property owners of good WASP extraction.”

This is true. Jon Walker Lind = WASPidy WASP WASP = Constitution applies
Jose Padilla = dark skin Hispanic = Gitmo/torture

I would like to see a teabag American citizen arrested abroad just so I can say “Rights Shmights, they aren’t citizens of that country, they have no rights.”

Not gonna happen- those people don’t even have passports.

“the underpants bomber was blackity-black-black and a muscleman, to boot.”

This is why I no longer lift weights.

What I find most amusing (if that’s really the word — maybe “totallyevidenttoanyonenotclinicallystupid” is a better choice) about Yoo’s piece is that we have millions of Americans who think offering health care to everyone and raising the top marginal rates by 3% are in the literal definition of “totalitarian dictatorship.”

I can’t even begin to imagine what they’d think if Obama were to do what Bush did and just claim “I’m the President and can do whatever the hell I want no matter what and no take-backsies!”

Although, come to think of it, maybe he should try it — perhaps their heads would explode and we’d be rid of them for good.

A guy can dream …

Mark D, they would accuse Obama of fascism in a heartbeat and not even acknowledge their hypocrisy because Shut Up! That’s why.

At least this crap was printed in The Weekly Standard instead of the NY Times or WaPo. I can only hope Yoo’s star continues to dip until he’s fulminating on World Net Daily and in The NY Post, where such Serious Thoughts belong.

Not gonna happen- those people don’t even have passports.

You’d think that, and then you go to Germany and see some old fat fart wearing a jacket emblazoned with a giant US flag on it, loudly complaining to his fat fellow travelers how horrible everything is in Germany and how much he hates it.

The ugly American abroad

“Spaceman Spliff said,
February 8, 2010 at 22:37
It was only with great trepidation that I followed the link to [shudder] The Weekly American Standard, in the quixotic belief that, prior to commenting here on John Yoo’s emissions, one is behooved to first inhale deeply of them, over there. As expected, it was a misguided exercise.”

Not unlike inhaling deeply of the dogshit, just before scraping it up with a shovel and depositing it into a bucket with the other dogshit. I believe this would be a fitting end this piece of shit as well.

Fuck Yoo, John.

“To save his presidency, Obama should follow the real lesson of FDR and our other great presidents and turn away from the failures of health care reform and nationalization of the economy. He will be remembered if he follows through in Iraq, pursues al Qaeda with the restoration of aggressive measures, and achieves victory in Afghanistan. If he loses in war in favor of an attempt to expand the size of government at home, he will take his place in presidential history alongside Jimmy Carter and Lyndon Johnson, rather than FDR and Ronald Reagan.”

Take his place alongside Lyndon Baines Johnson? Did this jerkoff somehow miss the fact that it was precisely his thing for escalating useless and bloody wars in third world countries that nailed Johnson’s presidency to the cross?

Take his place alongside Lyndon Baines Johnson? Did this jerkoff somehow miss the fact that it was precisely his thing for escalating useless and bloody wars in third world countries that nailed Johnson’s presidency to the cross?

It is precisely this kind of keen analysis that made Yoo such a useful idiot assistant for the previous administration.

John Yoo will go far. He will be Sarah´s first choice for Attorney General. Soon, they will begin campaigning together, since we now know she will make a run for 2012.

These shorters just kill me every time. Whenever I read a soul-crushing, mind-fuckingly stupid and evil piece like that, I pray to the Universe that there will be a hilarious “shorter” of it here.

You go to Germany and see some old fat fart wearing a jacket emblazoned with a giant US flag on it

This is very necessary, so that Americans will not be confused w/ Canadians while over there.

You go to Germany and see some old fat fart wearing a jacket emblazoned with a giant US flag on it

Well it wasn’t a NZer. When we want to be obnoxious arseholes elsewhere in the word we’re required by law to emblazon ourselves with a giant Australian flag.
Not that anyone knows the difference.

And I take it that Yoo is unfamiliar with the currently-popular constitutional concept of the ‘unitary Executive’.

So, can anyone explain to me why Barack Obama is supposed to take political advice from a guy who probably has to have someone else start his car for him every morning?

Here’s an idea, Professor Yoo: why don’t you try seeing how the other half lives by running for office? I’m sure whoever your opponent is will be most grateful for the cakewalk … or maybe you can run unopposed & get to find out what it’s like to face a mob in full-bore rage-mode on election night, many of whom are certain to have brought nice big flat boards along for some mysterious reason, completely surrounding the stage right after the entire security staff comes down with galloping bubonic plague & books off sick for the night … & the last words you hear before they strap you down are “hey, don’t worry – if you’re innocent, you have nothing to fear” … [fantasy sequence fades to black].

I was pretty amazed that he’s a law professor at Berkeley, until I remembered that Peter Duesberg is a biology professor at Berkeley.

Obama should follow the real lesson of FDR

that’s right…forget about the New Deal and Social Security and everything FDR did to bring the nation out of the Great Depression. also, forget that he laid the ground work for the creation of the United Nations. that’s pinko commie shit. all that is important is that FDR single-handedly won WWII, despite polio, by shoving his atomic crutches up hitler’s ass! america! fuck yeah!

wait, he died before the war ended? shit, well, still, forget all that pussy liberal shit he did: WAR PRESIDENT!!!!!

addendum: also, forget that WWII didn’t start until FDR’s 3rd term. obviously, he kept gettting re-elected because the people knew he’d fuck shit up in WWII, not because of domestica policies.