We sent Vasco to doggy heaven a few months ago. I’d love to abort some kids but I don”t have any. I’m off to the tubs.

Toodle!

The good news is that religious conservatives are breeding like rabbits. The bad news is that they are Muslims. Better hope you guys recruit a lot of homophobic Anglicans.

I’m confused. What I got from Rufus Thomas is that walking the dog is shtupping.

Bathhouses? What, is Donohue time-traveling from the seventies or something?

After they’re done boycotting the NFL, they’re gonna boycott dogs.

These idiots really don’t think anything through anymore, do they?

Going to bathhouses? Do we have bathhouses in America? ‘Cause if so, I want to know where they are.

Love the pic, but somehow, given the subject matter, wouldn’t Bacon have been terribly appropriate?

Aside from the fact that bacon is always appropriate. And delicious.

The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits

Funny, I thought the Quiverfull types were the type of conservative Protestants who think Catholics like Donohue and K-Lo are deluded and going to hell.

I can’t say I’m surprised WaPo gave space to yet another religious maniac.

These people are getting more and more desperate.

Yes, both of them.

In the fight over gay marriage, the scorecard is 30-0: traditional Catholics, evangelical Protestants, Orthodox Jews, Orthodox Christians, Muslims, and Mormons, along with a big contribution from the Latino and African American communities[…]

Holy shit Bill! (see what I did there?) Latinos aren’t traditional Catholics? I guess because traditionally Catholics are white.

Christ, this shit appeared in the Washington Post?

Setting aside the question of whether or not the Post is “liberal,” don’t they have any goddamn pride in what they do?

Christ, this shit appeared in the Washington Post?

The Post does this as a Public Service. It’s very hard for conservatives to get their voices heard in Obama’s Washington.

Latinos aren’t traditional Catholics?

Yeah, yeah. Next you’re going to tell me that those eeevul socialest Frenchies are Catholics too.

they’re too busy walking their dogs

Veiled masturbation with yo-yo reference.

The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits

I thought they only did it in the missionary position. Huh. Learn something new everyday.

OT: New WWOTW entrant?

Noted Secessionist Scholar Russell Longcore:

I hear a lot these days about the constitutionality of secession. In this article, I will prove that the Constitution is without authority and that the subject of secession related to the Constitution is entirely irrelevant, and that any states need not concern themselves with the constitutionality of secession.

Hilarity ensues.

Breeding like rabbits, nasty rabbits, which is the title of a fine film.

Get to Know Your Rabbit
NOT IN THE BIBLICAL SENSE.

Our three chief weapons are perversion, blasphemy, secular terrorism and an almost pathological hatred of the Pope.

Wow, they are still freaked out by Marquis de Sade?

Wow, they are still freaked out by Marquis de Sade?

Anything before the invention of the wetsuit confuses them.

Wow, they are still freaked out by Marquis de Sade?

They’re still vaguely irritated by Johannes Gutenberg and Galileo, too.

The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits

But they still won’t kiss between the bunny’s ears.

Unless they’re in an airport bathroom in Minneapolis or some other inappropriate or highly secretive locale.

I always get a chuckle when I hear the Quivery types brag about how many “Christians” they are raising, seemingly unaware that what matters, the only thing that matters in numbers games like this, is how many of their kids stay in the Church. And the best way to ensure that children stay in the Church is to make the community something appealing and life-enriching, not a soul-destroying round of baby-minding drudgery.

Even the Mormons have backed off from the quiverfull thing – though they did it in a very Mormon way. Some years ago they announced “you no longer have to have a ton of kids, and at no time did we ever say that you had to have a ton of kids.”

Though it takes a generation or two for the backwoods and outer-suburban and Utah County reaches to internalize the revisionism, so there’s still a population explosion going on.

Time is on the side of the angels
The Angels or The Rollings Stones? Personally “Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again” beats much of the Strolling Bones oeuvre but not in the sense of being able to claim Time as an ally. And since the Stoneds virtually admitted to having Symapthy For Mr Clev ver I don’t think that time is on the side of the angels.
Next week I shall prove ducks can’t float.

…the best way to ensure that children stay in the Church is to make the community something appealing and life-enriching, not a soul-destroying round of baby-minding drudgery.

I keep wondering how many of the Duggar kids will eventually come out. In both the literal and figurative sense.

He knows the Atheists arn’t coming to recruit his children.

The Homosexuals won the coin toss.

I don’t think the homosexuals want his kids either. The Mormons on the other hand…

I will find hordes of Catholic children bussed in from Wilkes Barre tearfully saying the rosary and holding up large photographs of small puppies munching on innocent embryos?

Only because the fine judges of Luzerne County, PA (Wilkes-Barre is its county seat) will send all the ghey libertine teenagers to privatized juvenile detention facilities to prevent those socially-retarded Christian “children of the coal” from aborting babies somehow conceived from evil butt secks they learned from Hollywood. Plus, they’ll get plenty of kickbacks to keep their mistresses’ in Catholic schoolgirl outfits.

Whatever’s left over they can use to buy pagan babies. Lots and lots of delicious pagan babies!

jesus wants yr dog to shit all over the floor

i would like to have kids but i am too busy aborting my gay dogs at the local bathhouse

mmy said,

October 25, 2009 at 1:16

Christ, this shit appeared in the Washington Post?

Setting aside the question of whether or not the Post is “liberal,” don’t they have any goddamn pride in what they do?

No, they don’t.

They even hired Bill Kristol.
~

There are some very clever names in this thread, but Vienna Lepanto just really tickles me.

I don’t think the homosexuals want his kids either.

I don’t think Donohue wants his own children. The way they talk about the duty to reproduce makes it clear that they don’t think children are something one chooses or wants.

Secularists within Catholicism and Protestantism are so out of control that it makes one wonder how any serious-minded person would ever accuse these religions of being oppressive.

Any serious-minded person has long ago moved on from accusing to concluding, Bill.

I get pregnant just to abort the fetus for fun. Then I eat it. It tastes like sin, great steak and a flowery chocolaty Pinot noir. THEN I walk my dog. But only after making sweet love to it.

Well, we’re walking the dog, so I guess he’s right about that.

I like the concept of being “busy” aborting my kids. It’s like punching a time clock, you know, drive to work, park in my usual space, boot up the computer and abort a kid before my 10 oclock coffee break.

The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits,

Why on earth do they assume that kids will be the same as their parents? Most people I know make a point of NOT being like their parents. It’s a rare family where the kids don’t rebell against their raising.

Because if yer believe a woman should have dominion over her own body that means you’re burning w/ desire to commit infanticide 24/7. Also practicing responsible family planning is for pussies.

The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits …

… & the bad news is that a hell of a lot of those born-again rug-monkeys are going to rebel & grow up to be DFH lesbian civil-rights lawyers.

Hollywood Jews have crucified Mel Gibson

Yeah, & the hard part for Mel is that he has to pretend not to be getting off on it.

Massive lulz-points for a raving godtard like Donahue referring to agnostic/atheist folks as “zealots” … methinks you might want to take that 2X4 out of your eye before you lose your shit over the mote in mine, dude. It’s right there in your King James Instruction Manual, FFS.

The Marquis de Sade was a pussy.

if the goal is to put an artistic dagger into the heart of culture, then it makes sense to use all the ammo available by attacking the sacred

He really stabbed his bullet into the heart of that metaphor there.

I think it was pointed out that he is himself divorced and has only two kids. He talks a good game, but hasn’t done so we reproducing crusaders.

“if the goal is to put an artistic dagger into the heart of culture”

WTF Does that even mean? Has somebody been drinking too much of Christ’s blood?

Has somebody been drinking too much of Christ’s blood?

It’s not Christ’s blood until it’s consecrated! *hic!*

Read it and weep, Inquisitor General.

Time is on the side of the angels

Rain-out notwithstanding, it looks like time is more on the side of the Yankees this year.

They have been known to choke fucking miserably, though.

Why on earth do they assume that kids will be the same as their parents? Most people I know make a point of NOT being like their parents. It’s a rare family where the kids don’t rebell against their raising.

Exactly, g! I guess Donohue never heard of THE KINGS OF LEON!!!

Donohue is divorced?

HERETIC! EXCOMMUNICATE THE BASTARD!

Speaking as a parent myself, I wonder where conservatives get time to produce more kids. Somehow neither walking the dog (we don’t have) nor getting abortions is what’s keeping this liberal from enlarging his family — it’s having enough resources (time, money, finding a bigger place to live) that’s limiting. Perhaps if we didn’t feel that our current kid wasn’t sopping up all of our time and we had more money so that way we could afford to live in a bigger place, we might concentrate more on having another kid?

Anyway, the best form of birth control is a kid — with a kid around, it’s hard to get the necessary time alone with your spouse to produce more kids. After one has enough kids, doesn’t the process become more self-limiting? Or does it get easier ’cause you just give the oldest kid some money and tell him/her to take the rest of the kids out to dinner and not come back for some time?

Donohue also recently got his shit in a knot over the threat posed to his faith by cartoon characters. http://is.gd/4zVGB

Oh yeah, Bill Donohue vs. the Simpsons. Hmmm…wonder how that’s going to turn out.

The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits
You see this notion quite often in wingnut rants. It implies that their offspring will automatically inherit their views as if conservatism is a genetic disease (which may indeed be the case).

I neither want nor expect my kids to be ideological clones of myself.

Were it not for Mel Gibson, there would have been no “Passion of the Christ.”

Yeah! How about that?

I neither want nor expect my kids to be ideological clones of myself.

Anyone who does is just begging for disappointment.

Or does it get easier ’cause you just give the oldest kid some money and tell him/her to take the rest of the kids out to dinner and not come back for some time?

For the sake of being inflammatory, this is the reason Catholics continued the practice of having too many kids long after infant mortality rates dropped to nearly zero. They’re too lazy to care for them, and found that beating the first few into submission led to the older practically “raising” the younger ones on behalf of the parents through learned behaviors — and we’re not talkin’ Dr. Spock here.

Bill Donohue did us all a favor recently by raising such a ridiculous stink about Amanda Marcotte, which, though it was an idiotic travesty, probably helped damage John Edwards’ primary campaign just enough to allow a guy with no tawdry sex scandals in his closet to take the lead and win the Presidency. So thanks, Bill! Your hard work helped bring us just a touch closer to the Obama presidency.

Ha ha![/Nelson]

Oh, Q:

Do rabbits get married?

Conditional followup: If not, does “breeding like rabbits” connote a leaning toward Sodomite/Gomorrite* behavior?

*Bonus Q: What was an inhabitant of Gomorra called?

A Gomer?

“Next week I shall prove ducks can’t float.”

Too easy. They’d have to be made of wood for that to work.

they’re too busy walking their dogs, going to bathhouses and aborting their kids.
Urban DIctionary FAIL… the term is ‘dogging’.

“Next week I shall prove ducks can’t float.”
The ones that do float are witches.

the term is ‘dogging’.

I’d have thought it was “gerbiling”.

You really don’t want to know about “llamaing”.

Jim@414 Catholics do not read the so gay King James version of the bible. They read the Douay a lousy French version. You may burn in hell for that comment.

Rick Sactum Santorum read that and had a major facepalm moment. “No, you idiot, I didn’t say WALKING the dog!”

In the fight over gay marriage, the scorecard is 30-0

No one tell Donohue about Massachussets. His head will x-plod.

Does William Donohue hear the Barking of the Walked Dogs while inside the bath house at E. 56th and 3rd Avenue? Or as he enters or leaves?

And does Elinor Donahue* know that she and Bill Donohue are divorced or has Bill been spending so much time listening to the Barking of the Walked Dogs while entering, lying face down in his cubicle with the door just slightly ajar, or leaving the bath house at E. 56th and 3rd Avenue?

*because I do not want a libel suit coming from Elinor Donahue, please let me be the first to acknowledge that I don’t know whether Elinor Donahue and Bill Donohue were ever married, much less divorced. Let’s hope for Bill Donohue’s sake that he’s been dipping his wick at that bath house at E. 56th Street and 3rd Avenue rather than sampling some of the pastries that emerge from St. Pat’s of a Saturday evening, because then Bill would Burn In Hell. Because J-e-s-u-s did proscribe adultery but never once said a word about that bath house at E. 56th Street and 3rd Avenue…

Catholics do not read the so gay King James version of the bible. They read the Douay a lousy French version.

That may be true for those wimpy post-Vatican-II secular Catholics, but Donohue is not one of those; he is a Conservative Catholic, for whom the only Bible to be safely read is the Vulgate, i.e. Latin.

We can safely ignore the opinions of St Thomas Aquinas since he was fat.

Experience has shown that if reading of the Bible in the vulgar tongue is permitted indiscriminately, due to the rashness of men, more harm than good arises.

“Rick Sactum Santorum read that and had a major facepalm moment. “No, you idiot, I didn’t say WALKING the dog!””

So, what, “screwing the pooch”?

if the goal is to put an artistic dagger

I read that as “Artful Dodger.” Which is actually better.

By the way, groin vaults? Flying buttresses? Those cathedrals are way homo.

And this, if you’ll permit me the Lateen:

“dicit ei Iesus ego sum via et veritas et vita nemo venit ad Patrem nisi per me.” What does this mean, kiddies?

“Jesus saith to him: I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No man cometh to the Father, but by me.”

“Dicit”? Pronounced with a hard “C”? “No man cometh to the Father, but by me”? Sorry, but Mr. Jeebers was obviously a colon-crasher.

Vade retro, Sathanas!

I love the conceit that somehow right-wingers just naturally make little right-wingers. If that were true, I’d be a taste-free right-wing white supremacist suburbanite, like my parents. Somethin’ didn’t take, there…maybe it’s ’cause I’m adopted. Goodness knows my sister has been known to spout KKK talking points in public. *shrug*

I’d like to know about Donohue’s kids, though. Five gets you ten one of the two of them (at least) has moved somewhere far, far away from Daddy Bill and never writes, never calls, and gives money to the ACLU…

Smut Clyde said,
October 25, 2009 at 2:18

Our three chief weapons are perversion, blasphemy, secular terrorism and an almost pathological hatred of the Pope.

AND SURPRISE. You forgot surprise!

Our Lady of Victories in Paterson, NJ has these really weird stained glass things of Vienna and Lepanto.

@Matt T.
“They’re still vaguely irritated by Johannes Gutenberg and Galileo, too.”

I think this is rather unfair.

First of all, Gutenberg was very useful to them in a time of need. You know what the first practical, commercial application of printing was? Printing forms for indulgences, that’s what. Within a few years after the Bible job. If you think I’m kidding, check out the specimen in the British Library. No, not “check out” in that sense, dummy! They’ve got a display you can look at.

As to Galileo, the Catholic idiot brigade (not the same as the official hierarchy, not since JPII — on this issue, at least) is more than vaguely annoyed with Galileo. They have many specific grievances which they air constantly all over the Intertubes: for instance, his failure to prove that the Earth moves, to the satisfaction of Catholic theologians; and then the incredible gall of his fans in pretending that that wasn’t sufficient reason for banning everything he ever wrote on any subject at all. This crappedcropped up in Dawkins’s blog, no less, a week or two ago. Nothing vague about these guys.

Has somebody been drinking too much of Christ’s blood?

It’s not Christ’s blood until it’s consecrated! *hic!*

Remember, transubstantiation does not change the alcohol content of the wine. *hic hic!*

My mother laughed for a couple of days after reading of this fact in the memoirs of a priest who had alcohol problems.

Not being Jewish, though, we didn’t think to make snarky remarks about the blood of the Lamb at Purim. Didn’t occur to me till just now.

the Hollywood Jews have crucified Mel Gibson

But he was just ASKING to be crucified. Look at how he was dressed!

“The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits.”

So, what exacty does that mean? Wikipedia to the rescue.

“Female rabbits do not actually ovulate until after breeding. They have a bifurcated uterus and often, breeding can involve multiple acts that can result in multiple impregnations from different bucks (male rabbits). Males are commonly sterile during the heat of summer months.”

So, the conservative women most of the times have children from different fathers, while the conservative men are often sterile during sommer months.
That, surprisingly, might be accurate.

“A litter of rabbit kits (baby rabbits) can be as small as a single kit, ranging up to 12 or 13; however there have been litters as big as 18. The gestation period is 30–32 days.”

And to recap, conservative offspring is called a “litter”, and they are considered people after 30 days so no evul baby murdering after that.

Yep, I think he is right. Republicans DO breed like rabbits.

[…]sexual libertines seek to upend the cultural order by attacking religion[…]

There’s a Cultural Order and religion is the keeper of it? Fucking little church boys, telling them God’ll get them if they tell, and transferring their troubles to a new, unsuspecting diocese are ways of keeping the Cultural Order?

Ya learn something new every day.<=== (definitely NOT a part of the Cultural Order.)

Just so Tintin knows it was caught:

Pius LXIX….*snerk*

Were it not for Mel Gibson, there would have been no “Passion of the Christ.”

I’m confused. Is Mel Pontius Pilate or Caiaphas?

practicing responsible family planning is for pussies.

Well, yeah, that and dicks.

Our three chief weapons are perversion, blasphemy, secular terrorism and an almost pathological hatred of the Pope.

And math!

*Bonus Q: What was an inhabitant of Gomorra called?

Dead.

Against dogs? Why does William Donohue hate St Roche?

Why on earth do they assume that kids will be the same as their parents? Most people I know make a point of NOT being like their parents. It’s a rare family where the kids don’t rebell against their raising.

The ratio of godless commies to born-again plutophiles among my siblings is 5:1. Poor, poor quiver-full fundie parents. 🙂

My favorite movie about Gomorra was the one where he battled Baragon.

Read the column

Thanks, but no.

art exhibits that show naughty bits threaten to bring the Church of Rome to its knees (insert altar boy joke here).

You know, when I see online pics of naughty Greek urns*, very often the description notes the urns are in the Vatican collection. It also seems the naughtier the urn the more likely that is to be true.

*it’s for RESEARCH. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

#

Veiled masturbation with yo-yo reference.

Kinky engineers are TROUBLE, I tells ya.

You know, when I see online pics of naughty Greek urns
What’s a Greek urn?

Wait, so the defense against the Catholic Church being oppressive is that it’s being overrun by secularists that Bill Donahue does nothing but rail against as servants of the Devil, and if he and his were in power, then we’d see some fucking oppression?

I’m not sure Bill actually understands who’s side he’s on.

LD, you missed the key sentence:

“Female rabbits do not actually ovulate until after breeding”

This explains a key mis-understanding of the reality-based community. In the reality-based community, we look at anti-abortion and anti-birth control rhetoric and think “well, don’t that make God the biggest murderer of them all — because so many fertilized eggs just fail to implant and anyway, if you aren’t taking the pill, one egg a month (or so) gets ‘wasted'”. But the thing is, conservative women, breeding like rabbits, actually don’t ovulate until after breeding. Thus, unless they were to be on the pill or have an abortion, no egg gets wasted nor fertilized egg distroyed in an “act of God”.

Did Mr. Donohue just approve of abortions if it’s limited to liberals?

“Christ, this shit appeared in the Washington Post?” No matter what insane batshit appears in the W/P, thanks to Woodward and Bernstein’s less than gentlemanly treatment of Richard Nixon thirty-odd years ago, it will always and forever be known as “The Liberal Washington Post”.

Time, it seems, is on the side of the angels

If by “angels” you mean “brown-skinned immigrants who breed like voles and vote Democratic” then yes, that is correct.

have to love those non-traditional Catholic Latinos. Sure there was a scary time when the Republicans looked like they might appeal to them but… no, they fucked up and let the base’s racism scare them over to democracy.

Ha ha.

What’s a Greek urn?

About a hundred drachmas a week [rimshot]

Hey, somebody had to do it.

LittlePig sto spizziti!

“The pinnacle of secular terrorism has now become a gay man walking his dog back and forth between the bath house and the abortion clinic.”

This made me laugh a lot. Great line!

Is WaPo and the NYT seriously racing to the bottom? Is that the real deal? Despite my wholly rational reluctance, I had to see if he really did cite Mel Gibson as a positive example, even after he kicked his wife of many years to the curb and bragged about impregnating his young-enough-to-be-his-daughter-by-a-comfortable-margin girlfriend on a talk show. Yup, he sure did. And this guy fancies himself the representative of Catholics in America. Gays couldn’t destroy Catholicism even if they wanted to; the line behind its self-professed defenders would be way too long.

I love how these assclowns automatically assume that just because conservatives are procreating in greater numbers (which I doubt, but let’s with it for a moment), they automatically assume that the kids are going to lay offerings at the shrine of St. Ronald of Reagan, be straight, conservative and religious.

I’m straight, but I came out of a conservative family as a bomb-throwing liberal atheist.