That Is One Big Pile Of Shit*
Posted on September 5th, 2009 by Tintin
ABOVE: Ken Connor (in suit)
Ken Connor, Ruhnoo Ahmurikah
Blinded By The Light of Discovery
- In order to understand the dangers of gene therapy all you need to do is see the movie Jurassic Park.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
*Cf.
Adolf Hitler extended the theory of eugenics to its atrocious conclusion…
Hitler in the Haus!
~
If something that never happened except in someone else’s imagination might come to pass in my own imagination, well, that would just be horrific!
So, we must fight the imaginary monsters with every tools we have.
Huh?
What, did the dinosaurs all have enhanced pancreases?
Especially when you’re spouting unsubstantiated bullshit.
Gene therapy is evil and unnatural. Now give me my synthetic boner pill.
Actually, the specific objection is quite reasonable:
But then he goes on to rant about the Bible and the Hitler. I’d just point to Gattaca.
From duh article in question:
“Nature does not always work the way we would like; but considering the vast complexity of the natural world, it is amazing that nature malfunctions as infrequently as it does.”
Nature malfunctions?
So, every Republican spokesman is now pre-Godwinning their own comment threads?
It’s subtle genius, that is.
I really hate to have to say it, but though he may be a crazy religious fucker, he’s really only pointing out the dangers when policymakers and scientists consider genetic interventions which actually are inheritable. There’s nothing unreasonable about being worried where that may lead.
I’m sure the next column will be arguing that this is all an attempt to reincarnate the combined corpse of Lucifer and Teddy Kennedy, but for this particular column I have no big gripes with it except that I would believe that he’s generally against science and that his main problem isn’t genetic alteration but the notion that the monkey has two mommies and no daddy.
Ken, if I have to spray my cotton with four times the amount of pesticide as I did ten years ago to kill the same number of weevils, is that Hitler’s fault or is it God’s will?
C’mon over to my place and I’ll show you a tobacco leaf with a mosaic virus on it in the image of the Virgin Mary.
Adolf Hitler extended the theory of eugenics to its atrocious conclusion…
Oh, WELL, I mean, Hitler got his ideas from us, sure, but he just did it to the extreme!
Methinks if Kenny lived back in the ’20s he’d be more than happy to support “the unfit” being bred out of existence.
So, basically… One wingnut has decided write about the fiction of another wingnut and act as if that were somehow relevant to the real world?
They’re becoming ever more self-referentially stupid, aren’t they? A few more articles like this and they’ll disappear up their own arses for good.
BTW, fucking great comment from the Exile article Jennifer lined to in the previous thread:
“Libertarianism, by contrast, is a theory of those who find it hard to avoid their taxes, who are too small, incompetent or insufficiently connected to win Iraq-reconstruction contracts, or otherwise chow at the state trough. In its maundering about a mythical ideal-type capitalism, libertarianism betrays its fear of actually existing capitalism, at which it cannot quite succeed. It is a philosophy of capitalist inadequacy.” – China Miéville
Damn, that’s some good stuff. Looks like I shall have to get off my butt and track down Miéville’s writings.
Obama wants to make the blacks the master race and gays a priviledged class by making whites, the people who built USA into a minority by taking all our money. It s just like Hitler alright.
Don’t you remember that movie “Monster On The Campus” with the college professor that gets coelacanth blood in a cut on his arm and turns into a caveman? Are we going to pretend this warning hasn’t been with us for decades?
May I just say that if genetic engineering is going to provide us with a real-life Barney the DInosaur, I am definitely agin’ it. Also.
whites, the people who built USA into a minority by taking all our money
Just sayin’.
For those of you who may have missed the link in the previous thread mentioned by Pere Ubu, here is the Amanda Carpenter/Mark Ames email exchange in all its glory:
Date: Thu, 6 Aug 2009 10:16:42 -0400
From: Amanda Carpenter
Subject: Megan McArdle
To: ames@exiledonline.com
Hey, Mark. I write a daily column for the Washington Times and want to do an item about your recent article about Megan McArdle. I was hoping you could explain to me the rationale for bringing her father into your disagreement with her policy positions. Why did you think this was necessary? Feel free to call me directly at the desk: 202-xxx-xxxx or email back. Hope you are doing well.
-Amanda
The years I spent in Berkeley were good for something, and that something was training on how to deal with all the street freaks and cultists like Ms. Carpenter. Here was my response:
Date: Thu, 06 Aug 2009 09:28:23 -0700
From: ames@exiledonline.com
Subject: Re: Megan McArdle
To: Amanda Carpenter
Sorry I didn’t respond sooner, I was busy this morning as a guest on MSNBC. As you can imagine, the life of a celebrity journalist is quite hectic.
You say you’re from something called “Washington Times”? That’s hilarious! Moonies defending libertarians! If Rev. Moon wants to interview me, have him contact me telepathically–your boss is The Messiah, I’m sure he can manage it. Otherwise, fuck off back to your swamp.
And yes, Pere Ubu is correct, there were several excellent comments in the comment thread following that exchange.
That’s hilarious! Moonies defending libertarians! If Rev. Moon wants to interview me, have him contact me telepathically–your boss is The Messiah, I’m sure he can manage it. Otherwise, fuck off back to your swamp.
Mah favrite part, let me show you it.
Hell, if she knew one of her followers was hanging around with religionists, Rand would bitchslap Megan and cast her into the outer darkness (or the Objectivist equivalent, which is probably somewhere in New York).
Obama wants to make the blacks the master race and gays a priviledged class by making whites, the people who built USA into a minority by taking all our money. It s just like Hitler alright.
yep, cuz ol Adolf was ALL ABOUT empowering the gays and the darker folks.
Hilarious. I HOPE that guy is for realz.
Obama wants to make the blacks the master race and gays a priviledged class by making whites, the people who built USA into a minority by taking all our money. It s just like Hitler alright.
Hitler privileged black and homosexuals more than any other group. And black homosexuals, hoo boy: fresh-baked cupcakes for breakfast-in-bed every day! So unfair to us straight crackers.
Hell, if she knew one of her followers was hanging around with religionists, Rand would bitchslap Megan and cast her into the outer darkness (or the Objectivist equivalent, which is probably somewhere in New York).
I strongly disagree. For a generous taste of that sweet Moonie money, Rand herself would have sung lead soprano in a mass wedding choir.
So unfair to us straight crackers.
Suck it up, Saltine. RItz and Carr’s Table Water win again!
heh. too slow for zombiez, tigrismus….
BUT YOU FORGOT ABOUT THE CUPCAKES! ‘sides, zombies don’t eat plain crackers like little ‘ol unsalted, fat-free, gluten-free me. I’m at “worse than cardboard” on the edibility scale.
we both forgot about Poland.
All-natural tig-brains. Zombie health food. Now available at Whole Zombie.
we both forgot about Poland.
We’ll always have Poland. (CUE: “As Time Goes By”)
Damn, that’s some good stuff. Looks like I shall have to get off my butt and track down Miéville’s writings.
Dude, China Meville is awesome!. By all means, read his trilogy, Perdido Street Station, The Scar, and The Iron Council. These are three of the most mind-blowing works of pure imagination I have ever read (and then re-read, just to savor the outrageous genious flavor). King Rat (which came out earlier, is also good, but the three “New Crobuzon” books are just indescribably…just, WOW!
“The field of genetics has been viewed as the last frontier of biological science, and with good reason.”
I love this. Start with a bland metaphoric truism and then claim it as proof of something.
“Chicago has been called The City of Big Shoulders, and with good reason.”
“Chicago has been called The City of Big Shoulders, and with good reason.”
Bad example. If you’ve ever seen a copy of the Spiegel catalog, you’ll know why.
The field of genetics has been viewed as the last frontier of biological science, and with good reason.”
Silly. There’s an ocean of non-science on the other side of that frontier. That’s it:
NO MOAR SCIENCE.
Hmmm.
*Ponders self-fecksing.*
So, uh, gene therapy equals eugenics equals Hitler now, huh? If you’re a wingnut, does anything having to do with genetics automatically equal eugenics therefore Hitler?
Tay-Sachs screening = auto-Hitlerism (with factory-standard heir conditioning).
I don’t really see how taking someone’s money turns them into a minority. Do we immolate when we have less than the cost of a flatscreen for every room? I mean, I know most conservatives do, but that would only matter if they were a *snicker* majority.
The field of genetics has been viewed as the last frontier of biological science, and with good reason
Wow, cool, so we’ve already figured out the details of how the brain computes the mind? I must’ve missed a memo.
Speaking of, if you find that there aren’t enough people in your life trying to burn you at the stake, try opening up a discussion about the biological basis for consciousness.
Is that Senator Frank in the background?\
Sorry, I couldn’t resist.
Please don’t correct me if he’s actually a representative because, frankly, I don’t care.
Sometimes fairy tales are better than non-fiction at communicating essential truths.
Hey, I smell some real pungent, er, WISDOM here, people!
“Sometimes abstinence is better than coitus at communicating essential STDs.”
“Sometimes heresy is better than orthodoxy at communicating essential religious truth.”
“Sometimes ugliness is better than beauty at communicating essential aesthetic merit.”
“Sometimes stupidity is better than logic at communicating essential intelligence.”
“Sometimes evil is better than virtue at communicating essential ethics.”
“Sometimes-”
OMG I CANT STOP PLZ HALP
…when push comes to shove doctors and scientists still wonder at the miraculous poetry and precision on display in the workings of life on earth.
I got your poetry and precision right here, pal.
The field of genetics has been viewed as the last frontier of biological science, and with good reason.”
Beyond which frontier there be dragons. Genetically engineered cybernetic nano SPACE dragons.
I strongly disagree. For a generous taste of that sweet Moonie money, Rand herself would have sung lead soprano in a mass wedding choir.
A higly unlikely scenario. Firstly, she made enough money on her atrocious books to have accept any money with unwanted strings attached, and secondly, cult leaders don’t usually let themselves be co-opted by other cult leaders, and thirdly, she was a hard-core individualist and atheist. A mass-wedding just isn’t her kind of scene.
Need advice about your latest megalomaniacal scheme? If only you could ask history’s greatest megalomaniac, “novelist” and “philosopher” Ayn Rand. Too bad she’s dead.
But wait! In 1963, a secret cabal of Objectivists intent on taking over the Student Union at MIT built the first robotic Ayn Rand, and now you can own a Randroid® based on their original design.
Comes with stock phrases such as “Morality ends where the gun begins,” “Pity for the guilty is treason to the innocent,” and “Nathaniel! Bring me another gin and tonic!”
Price: US$50,000 includes software*
Genetically engineered cybernetic nano SPACE dragons.
Robotic ninja space pirate dragons being ridden by hyperintelligent Nazi super apes.
Genetically engineered cybernetic nano SPACE dragons.
Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past from the Future Space Dragons, no doubt.
Price: US$50,000 includes software*
I suppose I have to supply my own cigarettes, too, huh?
Invest in Philip-Morris, guys, ’cause I’ll be their biggest buyer.
Robotic ninja space pirate dragons being ridden by hyperintelligent Nazi super apes.
Not enough zombie.
Speaking of, if you find that there aren’t enough people in your life trying to burn you at the stake, try opening up a discussion about the biological basis for consciousness.
In these parts, the stake burning parties are a seasonal thing and these people don’t get here until later in the year. They like to look at the foliage in the fall (leaf-peeping heretic torchers — true). But. But do you really need to go to something as scientifically complex as the “biological basis for consciousness” to get them chipping away at their flint fire-starter kits? Why not just, “The universe is billions of years old?” Or, “Human beings are animals, too?” It doesn’t really take that much to get them going, after all.
Nature malfunctions?
It wasn’t designed intelligently.
.Not enough zombie.
*nnnnnnnnrgh* Okay, then – hyperintelligent Nazi zombie super apes. Happy now?
Does this look like inteligent design to you?
try opening up a discussion about the biological basis for consciousness
or why brains taste so darn zombie-finger-lickin good.
OT update: No Studie yet. He has been a very well behaved young man, and is welcome to emerge when he’d like now, although it would be nice to be born to well-rested parents who aren’t forced to tear through boxes every time they need to find some little thing.
Huge thanks to a Sadlynaut lurker who, with his trusty pickup, helped us tremendously yesterday in getting most of our stuff moved. I don’t think he ever comments, but maybe if you guys encouraged him and helped him find a good nym he could be coaxed into joining the conversation. He’s a helluva nice guy, and would be a fun addition to the comments.
We have about a half-day left at the old place, getting the last loads of stuff to goodwill and cleaning up a bit, and then are out of that craphole. Tomorrow. We’ll deal with it tomorrow…
It doesn’t really take that much to get them going, after all.
The Fundies, sure, but the obvious conclusion that falls out the biology of mind– that what makes you you is the result of stuff that is going on in your brain so there can’t be a you after the brain dies– makes a lot of otherwise educated and sciency types start to reach for the matches. Goes double for those who’ve spent a lifetime bending themselves into the “science and faith can co-exist” pretzel.
OT update: No Studie yet.
I guess the threats of Glenn Bleccch and Skanky Coulter worked.
Only hope we didn’t scare him TOO much.
Happy now?
Please direct your inquiry to the esteemed Mr. Waters
Only hope we didn’t scare him TOO much.
Well, I think if I go more than a week past the due date (which doesn’t currently seem likely, with the number of contractions I’ve been having, but who knows…) they’ll induce.
I like to think of inducing him to be born involves promises of ice cream and ponies and trips to the dinosaur museum, however somewhere in the back of my mind I’m starting to understand that it would actually involve giving me doses of a horribly unpleasant hormone-y thing. Bleh.
Tomorrow. We’ll deal with it tomorrow…
yeah. You better hope lil Studie isn’t listening to you say that.
I like to think of inducing him to be born involves promises of ice cream and ponies and trips to the dinosaur museum, however somewhere in the back of my mind I’m starting to understand that it would actually involve giving me doses of a horribly unpleasant hormone-y thing. Bleh.
Chinese food and driving on bumpy roads.
Huge thanks to a Sadlynaut lurker who, with his trusty pickup, helped us tremendously yesterday in getting most of our stuff moved.
Way to go, Sadlynaut lurker!’
I, too, have had to move and found that a friend with a pickup who was willing to help was the best friend in the world.
Come say hi sometime!
~
I don’t think he ever comments, but maybe if you guys encouraged him and helped him find a good nym he could be coaxed into joining the conversation. He’s a helluva nice guy, and would be a fun addition to the comments.
Engineers are pretty intimidating….
but maybe if you guys encouraged him and helped him find a good nym
Robot Hitler? Wilbur Whately? No, near Salem… Joseph Curwen!
so there can’t be a you after the brain dies– makes a lot of otherwise educated and sciency types start to reach for the matches.
Ah. Yes. Very good point. They may not be fundies, but that “you are worm food, Dude!” moment can be bit too much. And to be fair, it is to a lot of people.
And big props to Sadlynaut Lurker. Helping someone move (especially someone you don’t know well) is doing Spag’s work. We could have a naming contest or something…
Please direct your inquiry to the esteemed Mr. Waters
If Muddy Waters says it, that settles it.
MAH HED – I HANGZ IT IN SHAME
Robot Space Pirate?
Lurker, we need details so we can CUSTOM SHAPE a nym to your specifications. Then you will be bespoken for.
I guess the little guy caught wind of this.
Well, if he starts commenting he will not be a lurker anymore so I’m suggesting Naut Lurker as a nym.
We could have a naming contest or something…
what, you’re leaving Substance bait in the thread now? It takes so little for him to pull the trigger on the Janus Node.
Then you will be bespoken for.
Nice.
The Silent One (with Pickup).
The front wheel of my bicycle bespoken but alas, my back wheel be broken.
Lurking Pickup?
The Silent One (with Pickup).
SO/PU?
LDMM–those are probaly “false” contractions.
Like “couldn’a”, or “oughta’ve”
Stealthy Mover-Secret Ninja?
my suggestions for a soon to be ex-lurker nym:
Mecha-Ghandi
Robo-Albert Schweizer
Ultra Guy-with-pickup-truck-and-the-time-and-charity-to-help-the-occasional-person-who-could-really-use-a-hand
SO/PU?
Always with the poop.
Mecha Gandhi has a nice ring to it.
I’m about to drive 5 hours to West Va., so see youse on the flip side. (IF WP lets me post from my undisclosed, yet disclosed, location.)
~
Always with the poop.
Hey, that’s my first time with the poop. I’ve got a lot of catching up to do in that scategory.
Kudos to Lurker Dude! I have always told my son that you should always offer to help when someone is in the process of moving. It’s a shitty job and you always need more help than you have. It’s a karma thing–the more people you help move, the more will show up when you move–even though they probably won’t be the same people.
Hmm. Sadlynaut Lurker comes in and helps solve a problem facing The Studey Infrastructure Management and Support Team. SL helps them get ready for Studey. SL’s got Studey’s back, as it were.
Studeybacker?
Predetermines Berta the Permissible Anglerfish
Penelope Presumes the Steller Sea Lion
Doctor Ashely the Humpback Whale
Zimopehkoy Germicide the Poignant Beautician
Shudepgoywe Boxcars the Shrimpfish
Bayonne Tongues-Appropriators the Besotted Needlefish
Socelayvdiv Turnable
Dr. Honey Teresa the Servant
Vance Brigida
Major Antecedents the Marlin
Sergeant Michael
Spotty Factual the Bighorn
Koreans Foogizous the Graphic Artist
Quoyalline Boycott-Explicitness
Senator Couddede Bosoms-Dreamy the Amorphous Loan Officer
Specialist Realtor the Archer
Master Sergeant Yoyconversationally Clytemnestra-Boswell
Yixquoocli Preebo
Kera Popping the Deep Tortoise
Equivalent Kido the Private Detective
Orlando Raymonde the Drywaller
Rear Admiral Willamette the Opaleye
Kraig Vesvixtoucr the Rough Scad
Stephany Rena the Journalist
Virtually Penelope
Socerob Sithbiklsuz
State Representative Zimosunset Plainview
Loychcortney Ployqupiwkoureplish
Staciwouj Pox the Crystal Fathead Sculpin
Chu Snappily the Platypus
Florinda Overturning-Napkins the Personal Trainer
Daciacash Vixseecpoycshif the Oboist
Ensign Sushaster Sushmayxeczooch the Seething Hayward
Lanell Deforestation the Estate Agent
Susan Preventives
Ploycender Whitens the Salesperson
Baroness Gamanual Sealy-Backstairs the Tri-colour Illusionist
Crucifixion June the Glowlight Danio
Lolitacu Damge the Ageless Mole Salamander
Pythagorean Ara the Everlasting Illuminator
Hostilities Evasive
Juwonayeyoym Ignacia
Sylvie Vennie the Barren Eagle Ray
Cardinal Lucile Reeds the Naked-Back Knifefish
Mammalian Iola the Whale
Insides Campaigning the Icy Oystercatcher
Grandpa Bemhumidity Unwieldiness
State Senator Klenobler Gondola-Hornet
Zokle Prussianizes Olin-Beauties the Medusafish
Afar the Dove
Edyth Agnus the European Chub
what, you’re leaving Substance bait in the thread now? It takes so little for him to pull the trigger on the Janus Node.
Whoa.
LDMM–those are probaly “false” contractions.
Yes yes, false. But every 2-3 minutes. I’m happy with a coupla times an hour right now.
did I call it? SM brings the JanusNode!!
Janus Knowed?
Chu Snappily the Platypus
this is my Zombie Buddhist name.
Or #23 at the Thai place up the street.
Heh heh…What?
Hey!!!
Susan Preventives
GASP! I thought our identities were protected here!
zrm eats at the Peking Moon.
Kudos to Lurker Dude! I have always told my son that you should always offer to help when someone is in the process of moving. It’s a shitty job and you always need more help than you have. It’s a karma thing–the more people you help move, the more will show up when you move–even though they probably won’t be the same people.
Yes, kudos definitely due. Helping someone else to move is only slightly less excruciating than having to move yourself. The last major move I had to do didn’t even involve much in the way of moving…I needed help moving stuff back into the house from the detached garage after a lengthy building addition/remodel project. I also brought in a small truckload of stuff from my mom’s, since she had remarried and was moving in with her husband. But even though it wasn’t that big of a move, I asked everyone to come help, knowing that with 10 people it would be done in little over an hour. We made it into a “moving party”; as soon as the stuff got moved back in, I fired up the grill and cooked for everyone, had cold beer on hand, etc. It was definitely the most painless and pleasant move I’ve ever experienced. Had I had to go through packing the whole house and then unpacking it, it would have been a lot harder, but still – just getting the stuff from point A to point B is usually the most exhausting part. I recommend the moving party strategy to everyone.
Okay, if there was ever a time to de-lurk, this seems as good as any.
I’m consistently inconsistent, but over the years, have read a fair bit of online blogging of the type that is humourous, and makes the wingnuts gnash their teeth. I’ve even occassionally commented. I do notice that many of the ‘old-timers’ here, show up regularly other places too, so, I’ve been trying to come up with a name to use for all occassions.
Despite Substance McGravitas’ useful list, I had already picked my nym, though, I was sorely tempted by “Mammalian Iola the Whale”.
That said, I think the Sadlynaut lurker should go with “Trusty Pickup”,
So, should I ever get around to blog reading more often, you may see me pop here there and other places. If I have some sort of life realization that causes me to lose all procrastinating tendencies, I may even start the blog I always imagine I could write, if I ever got the dishes done.
Oh, and if ‘Trusty Pickup’ isn’t working for the lurker, he can try on some of my rejects, so, feel free to use one of my leftovers:
– Should Know Better
– Humanoid Sheep
– One of the Madding Crowd
– Shows Potential
– Helplessly Hopeless
Lady Doctor Missus Marita – I’ve heard it said that relaxing warm showers are the key to convincing the wee one to make an appearance.
Oh, and I should have added: a friend will help you move, but only a best friend will help you move a body.
Michael Crichton was a concern troll.
(Incidentally I had no problem switching the roles of the children in the movie, but it should have been that way in the book to begin with.)
And black homosexuals, hoo boy: fresh-baked cupcakes for breakfast-in-bed every day! So unfair to us straight crackers.
What? You got to be the cupcakes!
a friend will help you move, but only a best friend will help you move a body.
Dogs are great for that.
Oh yeah, the article, and my original point of posting.
I agree with Till up at the top, I think it is reasonable to have concerns about working with genes, and being cautious. There are two problems though.
One, right-wingnuts, even the ‘Christian’ ones, don’t seem to care much about altering our environment when it comes to the chemicals and hormones spewed into the world from rampant corporate capitalism that most often puts its factories in third world countries.
Two, we really need a name, something like Godwin’s Law, for when the conversation/blog all comes back to who has control over their own bodies.
Horse of another colour:
Roe’s Law?
Roe’s Law?
He Who Walks Behind the Rose Law.
The real trouble began when we started playing God by choosing our own careers and where we want to live. If God didn’t want me to be a computer programmer in Colorado, why was I born to a computer programmer in Colorado?
try opening up a discussion about the biological basis for consciousness
You should hang out with the Gibsonian school of perceptual psychology, the direct-perception people. They’ll tell you that “All you need to know about brains is how to cook them”.
try opening up a discussion about the biological basis for consciousness
I haz enzymes, therefore I think.
I guess the little guy caught wind of this.
You know, it’s a combination of a bad scan, a tiny font and my Old Guy Sight, but at first I could have sworn that read “RAPE BY PORCH”. And I was marveling at the modern Polizei who needed to be that specific in a summary like that.
Not that rape is something to joke about, but you know what I mean.
“RAPE BY PORCH”
Fuck, that triggered me.
What? You got to be the cupcakes!
(Long) Pork-flavored cupcakes. My, how revolting.
(And I know I do this too often, but I hereby request a backstory on “FUCHING FERRETS” and “JanusNode”.)
Today our methods of playing God are more subtle, but no less inhumane. With our righteous defense of a woman’s “right to choose” and an individual’s “right to die,” we assume the divine mantle of Creation and Destruction.
Troodat. We must expand this to its logical conclusions:
Medical science in general is an interference with The Creator’s decision to give us diseases when He feels it is time for us to die;
Living in houses is a usurpation of God’s manifest desire for us to live in trees;
In fact, even the most basic hunting and gathering is an insult to a loving God, who will surely cause food to appear in our hands–or better yet, our mouths–when He wants us to eat.
It’s a hoax of course. Someone is giving Beck a taste of his own medicine. They have crossed the line tort-wise, but some items are amusing.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090831234027AAoTxL3
http://glennbeckrapedandmurderedayounggirlin1990.com/
http://diebeckdie.blogspot.com/
Am I a bad person for hearing “the divine mantle of Creation and Destruction” in the voices of Julian and Sandy?
Yeah, JanusNode flew right over my head too.
It’s a hoax of course. Someone is giving Beck a taste of his own medicine.
Well, after Joe “Dead Secretary” Scarborough and Rush “Denny’s” Limbaugh, dare we speculate what His Bleccchness might be up to in his private hours?
It would be wrong not to, after all.
Am I a bad person for hearing “the divine mantle of Creation and Destruction” in the voices of Julian and Sandy?
“Don’t be strange, troll in!”
It’s a sign, I tells ya.
May I just say that if genetic engineering is going to provide us with a real-life Barney the DInosaur, I am definitely agin’ it. Also.
What if dinosaurs really were purple?
And subversive, too.
Some say the real tragedy behind Jurassic Park was that was the last time Jeff Goldblum’s participation would green light a film.
Today our methods of playing God are more subtle, but no less inhumane. With our righteous defense of a woman’s “right to choose” and an individual’s “right to die,” we assume the divine mantle of Creation and Destruction.
For all the talk about playing God, assuming divine mantles, and whatnot, I bet not one of these dudes has EVER forsworn AC at work even though God SPECIFICALLY condemned man to get food by the “sweat of [his] brow,” much less ever declined to get a tetanus shot or colon tumor sliced out or whatever medical fandango some Dr told him he needed to do PRONTO.
Roe’s Law?
Veiled VINCE FOSTER reference.
Kenneth Horne: With all these methods of playing God coming out, I though it was about time I got up to scratch.
Julian: Don’t let us stop you. Yes, well I think Sand and I can show you something fairly kinky if you hang on for a second —
Kenneth Horne: Thank you. And I’d like to see some clothes as well.
Sandy: Oh bold! Now let’s see — to start with — what would be really unusual in a gents suit?
Kenneth Horne: Danny la Rue?
Sandy: I think we’ll treat that crude pleasantry with the contempt it deserves, don’t you Jule? How about a nice Divine Mantle?
Kenneth Horne: Why is it printed all over with motorbikes?
Julian: We call it Robed in Triumph. Would you like to try it on?
Kenneth Horne: Yes, I must admit that it’s sybaritically autocratic but it tends to bind me under the armpits. Haven’t you got something any more conservative?
Sandy: Only in bespoke. Go on Jule, show him your swatch.
Julian: What again — Well, there’s your denim, comes nice in your burnt marmalade.
Sandy: All the browns are very fetching. Comes beautiful in your donkey. And then there’s your silks; you have the shot silk, the wild silk — well fairly wild — and then there’s the raw. How do you think he’d look in the raw Jule?
Julian: I’m not besotted with the idea.
[…]
the direct-perception people
I did a little Gazooling and, man, that looks like the 30-piece box of Ignnit MacNuggets.
Tell this guy we could resurrect St. Ronnie with gene therapy and he’d cut a check faster than he could jizz his pants.
I think we kind of usurped that divine mantle of Destruction back when we had to bomb Japan.
So, y’know, whoop, cat’s out of the bag.
my kwantim st8 suprposition. it hz co-lapsed.
..we assume the divine mantle of Creation and Destruction.
Too Much Joy sang …to create, you must destroy
God is a Punk.
Tell this guy we could resurrect St. Ronnie with gene therapy and he’d cut a check faster than he could jizz his pants.
At this point, though, Ronnie’s brains are soupier than Terri Schiavo’s
We checked.
If “the road to hell is paved with good intentions” does that mean the road to heaven is paved with evil intentions? Should we all stop with the good intentions or something?
…and become Libertarian fuckwads or similar?
does that mean the road to heaven is paved with evil intentions?
I believe that it is in fact a stairway. Carpeted, if our stairs are any guide, with fresh hairballs recently hoicked up by the cat. Watch your step on the way up; you don’t want to slip on one of those Lego men and go tumbling arse-over-kite all the way to the bottom again.
The road to heaven is paved with carpeted stairways? No wonder it’s a hellish road.
with fresh hairballs recently hoicked up by the cat.
Those are from Ceiling Cat.
Heaven is entered through an unmarked door in a dark alley.
Tell ’em Job sent ya.
“We reject the Christian understanding of sin and fallenness”
yes. i reject the christian understanding of sin and fallenness.
Put the god damn cat cat back in the god damn box. Now.
Okay, so now you have to travel a road paved with hairball covered carpeted staircases through a dark alley to enter through and unmarked door.
Heaven is entered through an unmarked door in a dark alley.
Unveiled BUTTSEX reference.
fucking pelicans.
Just FYI, I believe the Gollum, er, Glen Beck thing got started at Reddit. Olbermann has already chastised them (twithout mentioning the site by name) with a worst person award.
Does this mantle make my ass look fat?
The field of genetics has been viewed as the last frontier of biological science,
and with good reasonby those who figure there will never be any other advances in science because Jesus is coming to Rapture them up tomorrow.fizzied
Put the god damn cat cat back in the god damn box. Now.
It’s already there.
Some of the time.
“look”? whaddya mean “look”?
GOP dinosaurs just don’t wanna evolve.
When I hear about Scrödinger’s Cat, I reach for my gun.
Best JPII quote.
BTW: Stephen William Hawking==When Willing, I Speak Math.
It’s always about the damned cat. Scrödinger’s dog would actually bring him the paper, but do you hear about him?
Does this mantle make my ass look fat?
Needs link.
Oh, yeah. Oooh, ahhh, that’s how it always starts.
Then laterIn the morning there’s running and screaming.In my experience.
Okay, so now you have to travel a road paved with hairball covered carpeted staircases through a dark alley to enter through and unmarked door.
Then you have to wait for a thread with an open comment window.
I bet the “divine mantle of Creation and Destruction” could surround a good-sized blaze.
Okay, so now you have to travel a road paved with hairball covered carpeted staircases through a dark alley to enter through and unmarked door.
With a sign on the front saying “Beware of the Leopard”.
Oh, yeah. Oooh, ahhh, that’s how it always starts. Then later there’s running and screaming.
Ah, yes, I remember those college days too.
Then you have to wait for a thread with an open comment window.
*DING!*
Now serving number 45,639,412,570.
Hey ZRM,
Elevating the false successes of Ceiling Cat is no different from elevating statues to dictators in authoritarian regimes: It’s the diefication [sic] of idolatry at the expense of the univerisal [sic] dignity of the individual.
With our righteous defense of a woman’s “right to choose” and an individual’s “right to die,” we assume the divine mantle of Creation and Destruction.
*note: hiroshima and nagasaki babies not covered under mantle regulations
Being an American who would have been thrown in the alley to die in the Socialist UK, I can’t spell “Schrödinger.”
Being an American who would have been thrown in the alley to die in the Socialist UK, I can’t spell “Schrödinger.”
Be glad you didn’t go to an American public school, or you’d be lucky if you could spell “cat”.
(NOTE: Post may contain significant amounts of snark. Snark measured by weight; some settling may have occurred. Apply only as directed. For external use only. Cash, check, or money order only. If erection lasts more than 4 hours, hie thee to an emergency room post-haste or kiss Mr. Happy goodbye. (Kids, can you say “blood clot”?) Do not feed the commenters. Offer not good in Sectors “R” or “N”. Batteries not included. Do not taunt Happy Fun Pere.)
I bet the “divine mantle of Creation and Destruction” could surround a good-sized blaze.
You know who else liked divine mantles?
HITLERBURGES, that’s who.Okay, so now you have to travel a road paved with hairball covered carpeted staircases through a dark alley to enter through and unmarked door.
in a maze of twisty passages, all alike.
in a maze of twisty passages, all alike.
Designed by Argentine Victorian art-architect Jorge Luis Burges.
Buggrit. This dark alley is clogged with all the bodies of unfit people who were thrown there to die by the socialist NHS.
You know what else leads to Heaven? Death in June tracks.
I don’t think he ever comments, but maybe if you guys encouraged him and helped him find a good nym he could be coaxed into joining the conversation. He’s a helluva nice guy, and would be a fun addition to the comments.
“Mr Awesome”, while a totally appropriate description, is not very original, so my suggestion is “Al Truistic”.
Two thumbs, up, good sir!
in a maze of twisty passages, all alike.
GO NORTH
GET CAGE
GET BIRD
XYZZY
Offer not good in Sectors “R” or “N”.
You bastards still don’t deliver in the hills?
Bureaus Preebowebmitpoho’s Arugula Fudge
Ingredients:
1 brine shrimp
2 cans arugula, passably chilled
1 anarchistic hoop cheese, reliably sauteed
4 sticks apologetic scabbard fish carapace, primitively salted
4 cans butter
5 bunches garlic
Constrictedly grease a cookie sheet. Separate brine shrimp foot from lung. Discard lung. Mash the arugula with the hoop cheese over low heat in a jar. Stuff the resulting goo into the brine shrimp. Salt – very serenely – the scabbard fish carapace, butter, and the garlic. Stomp everything together. Fry in trout-perch oil for 9 minutes. Serves 2 peculiar individuals with lily stomachs.
ARUGULA fuckin’ FUDGE man.
Had to happen.
in a maze of twisty passages, all alike.
GO NORTH
GET CAGE
GET BIRD
XYZZY
IT IS PITCH BLACK…
You bastards still don’t deliver in the hills?
You got crazy people up there, what with all the Bozos and Bezerkers and people taking off their shoes and sitting in trees and smoking anchovy eyes.
Cripes, I’m still paying Duke Of Madness Motors for the last truck I took up there, after it got trashed by a bunch of hippy-type youths all claiming they were friends of Deputy Dan.
Learning to play the flute, here in my tree.
In the spirit of the thread, I suggest our Lurker Hero call himself Zombie Space Monkey. But that’s just me.
And LDMM, not to put too fine a point on it but Gav is I’m sure well supplied with a, er, natural labor inducer. Not only that but application of same to the necessary area can be fun for the both of you. Odd, isn’t it, that the same method that got the process started can get it over the hump, so to speak, into the next phase.
Honest to spag, it worked for us with number two, who appeared to be all toocomfortable in there.
Crazy fugues and improper melodies of the Bezirk DO NOT WANT.
Damn you, Sub Machine Gun, I was trying to avoid moving/eating (six hours w/o any carbon footprint so far) but once I saw it was “lung-free” I had to get up & get some.
Mme. Lady Doctor Dame:
Can we ship you some of this?
Crap on a crutch, I’m really hungry now!!
Crazy fugues and improper melodies of the Bezirk DO NOT WANT.
Kid-nork, kid nork.
In the spirit of the thread, I suggest our Lurker Hero call himself Zombie Space Monkey
Maybe needs a pinch of Pirate and a dash of Robot?
“Maybe needs a pinch of Pirate and a dash of Robot?”
Perhaps, but I’m concerned that too many words would push us into The Goddamn Batman’s territory. And those are toes you do not want to step on.
The clown fell on hard times after his show was canceled, and was forced to branch out into other pursuits.
Perhaps, but I’m concerned that too many words would push us into The Goddamn Batman’s territory. And those are toes you do not want to step on.
*cough*
Haven’t heard from the Lady Doc for awhile (Or Gavin). Is she finally having an out-of-body experience, or is she still team-building?
These do deliver in sectors R & N.
Wasn’t even looking, wanted to see this. Which was disappointing.
Perhaps, but I’m concerned that too many words would push us into The Goddamn Batman’s territory. And those are toes you do not want to step on.
Because then he can’t sleep properly.
Before you judge the Goddamn Batman you should walk a mile stepping on his toes.
Next you’ll be messing around with Jim.
IT IS PITCH BLACK…
NOM NOM NOM NOM
FOREVER.
These do deliver in sectors R & N.
Well, SEE if they’ll get you your hot buttered groat clusters! Nyahh!
Wasn’t even looking, wanted to see this. Which was disappointing.
BO-RING. But that picture is pure 100% nightmare fuel. She’s grinning like she just figured a way to extract my brain without opening my skull.
Mrs. Dr. Marita: FWIW, I had false labor for a week and a half with Nicklet #1. This was during the second week after the alleged “due date.” (I weighed about 160 pounds from all the Snickers and Cheese Whoppers during those long long post-“due date” days and nights, plus the kid was a 9-pounder.) This should be a sign of things to come: An independently-minded brilliant child who will henceforth do things on her/his own schedule. On the other hand, once she decided the time was right, it happened pretty quickly.
Please keep us posted in your abundant spare time. I can’t imagine moving and awaiting your first-born simultaneously.
As for the rest o’ yuz: Good grief people, we’re EXPECTING A BABY HERE! What the fuck are you children blabbing on about? I weep for the future.
OMFG
OMFG
My eyes!! Damn, put some sort of warning on that link. That cover pic burned my retinas.
Can make a comment?
Hurray! Nite…
OMFG
Nein, nein, Herr Doktor Goebbels, ze ponts do not make your azz look big. Nein!
Apparently, the most effective way to win an argument with someone who has different political views than you do is to put zem on a trrrrrrrrain to ze camps!!!!!
What the fuck are these people thinking?
Snickers and Cheese Whoppers
They make malted milk balls … WITH CHEESE?!?!?!?
I’ll be out wandering the streets from store to store, stumbling and drooling, until I find some. Goodbye.
By the way: Are we never to receive any plausible explanation for the obvious muzzling of comments on Brad’s “Bullshit” post? Or shall we assume that the wholesale thugtard censoring of Messiah Obama’s upcoming “Brainwash the Children” address has somehow garnered the approval of the Sadly overlords? A bit reticent now that an impressionable young mind is in the offing, perhaps? Hypocrits [sic]!!
Are we never to receive any plausible explanation for the obvious muzzling of comments on Brad’s “Bullshit” post?
The Obama Administration has promised to release the secret list of visitors to that post within 60-90 days.
Don’t turn around, oh-ho-ho
Der Blecchster is in town oh-oh-oh
It’s late Saturday night, and no one will notice, but I’m famous!
It’s late Saturday night, and no one will notice, but I’m famous!
Well, I hope you are proud of yourself. He banished you WITH ALL CAPS. I am sure you feel terrible.
“Say good night, Looch”
“Goodnight, Looch.”
OMFG
He looks like Colonel Klink.
WARNING: Brain bleach warranted if you read the following:
You’ve been warned…
Wanna bet Pat Buchanan is fapping to that picture of Beck? Any takers?
OMFG
Alexei Sayle has written another book?
I hereby request a backstory on “FUCHING FERRETS”
They inhabit the Garden of Fuching Paths.
They inhabit the Garden of Fuching Paths.
Well played, Herr Doktor!
Pierre Mustelid, Author of the Quixote.
tigrismus started it.
Designed by Argentine Victorian art-architect Jorge Luis Burges.
His library design — more restrained than you’d expect.
A Clockwork Labyrinth?
More like The Library of Babel.
Cripes, Word Press has a long memory!
A Clockwork Labyrinth?
More like The Library of Babel.
A Borges/Burgess mashup would be fantastic, just pulling out of my backside, I’m getting:
Tlön, Ultraviolence, Yarblocko Tertius
IT IS
PITCH BLACKlate, my brain may already have been eaten by aGRUEzombie from Milwaukee.OK, I don’t care if is Saturday night somewhere, you people gotta get out of here, it’s closing time.
Indeed.
Of course, Teh Wiki misses that this means one can reduce the entire library to a single 410 page volume. If decoded properly, it will translate to any other book. The trick then is having command of infinite variations of an infinite number of ciphers, making oneself the very home of Babel. The obvious end to this is that the book is, as it must be, blank, and Kelley’s assertion that it would be quicker simply to write the book one is looking for becomes the most accessible solution for mere mortals.
Just ask the NSA.
Also,
Droog, the Memorious
or
The Circular Milkbar
No, really, you’ve obviously had too much.
I couldn’t serve you even if it weren’t closing time.
Just ask the NSA.
I hear that the Total Information Initiative has been renamed Project Aleph..
Justme’s comment above has superceded earlier plans to rant about Castel Coch being built on “Circular ruins”.
Teh Wiki also fails to note that the library described in The Shadow of the Torturer is also inspired by Borges’ ouvre and *spoiler alert* features a thinly-diguised Borges as Head Librarian. My favorite bit in the passage (reminds me of teh t00bz):
There is a cube of crystal here — though I can no longer tell you where — no larger than the ball of your thumb that contains more books than the library itself does. Though a harlot might dangle it from one ear for an ornament, there are not volumes enough in the world to counterweight the other.