Chuck Norris Mugs Reality
Fresh off his roundhouse kick to the face of the anti-birthers, Chuck Norris serves up some ‘facts’ (and wouldn’t he just) about health care reform:
Dirty Secret No. 1 in Obamacare
While watching these political hot August nights, I decided to research the reasons so many are opposed to Obamacare to separate the facts from the fantasy. What I discovered is that there are indeed dirty little secrets buried deep within the 1,000-plus page health care bill.
If it was David Vitter’s copy you were reading, the diaper coupons you found tucked away in the document weren’t really part of the bill, Chuck.
Dirty secret No. 1 in Obamacare is about the government’s coming into homes and usurping parental rights over child care and development.
OMFG … I can see it now:
I hope good ol’ Chuck is going to be giving some tips to poor Kenny Gladney.
~
Okay, so who’s going to do the first Chuck Norris joke?
“Chuck Norris is so tough his head is nothing but rock”?
“I hope good ol’ Chuck is going to be giving some tips to poor Kenny Gladney.”
Tips as in for self defense or as in contributions for healthcare?
Poor Chuck. Been kicked in the head a few times too many..
Or perhaps not ENOUGH times?
It turns out that Gladney is covered under his wife’s insurance and the plea for donations was just another fraud perpetrated by Gladney and his Lawyer. Although his lawyer says if people want to donate money to help out someone who is unemployed there is nothing fraudulent about that.
What is wrong with these fuckers? I like the government interfering in my children’s healthcare. It really helped that they didn’t get measles or rubella, and the hospitals the bastard government provides and the paramedics it trained come in really handy when your child is panicking and breathless with croup.
I’m SO calling bullshit on ANYONE having read the supposed 1000+ page bill. We’re supposed to believe your average American, who can barely be arsed to read at all, has just decided to curl up with a 1000 page legal document. Yeah, RIGHT.
I wouldn’t worry about it too much, we all know that the wingnuts would never listen to anything one of those Hollywierd actors might say.
OT:
Someone may have already brought this up (today’s orgy o’ new posts has my tiny brain befuddled), but it looks more & more like the Blossom is off the rosy Turd.
The most obvious thing about the cost of curing Kenny’s injuries is that one Ace bandage on the knee can’t be all that expensive.
What is wrong with these fuckers? I like the government interfering in my children’s healthcare.
Y’know, a part of me is kind of curious what the overlap is between these folk and the anti-vaccination whackos.
I certainly know the Scientologists overlapped with the anti-UN fluoridated water fear mongers back in the days of the Alaska Mental Health act-thingy.
Chuck Norris thinks the hero of ‘Huckleberry Finn’ was Pap.
From Jim’s link above: Miers testified that Rove complained to her about Iglesias, but she could not recall whether he specifically said he should be fired.
This sounds weaselly, but in fact it would be hard to tell whether firing was necessarily entailed by “THAT PIG-FUCKING BASTARD! WE’LL GET HIM AND HIS LITTLE DOG TOO! DO YOU HEAR ME? WE WILL BEND HIM OVER A TOILET AND FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF HIM WHILE HIS CHILDREN WATCH! aAAAAIeEEEE!”
Oh. So that’s how Chinatown ends. Thanks for spoiling it, Libs.
From the bill itself: ‘SEC. 440. HOME VISITATION PROGRAMS FOR FAMILIES WITH YOUNG CHILDREN AND FAMILIES EXPECTING CHILDREN.
‘(a) Purpose- The purpose of this section is to improve the well-being and development of children by enabling the establishment and expansion of quality programs providing voluntary home visitation for families with young children and families expecting children.
Voluntary for states, voluntary for parents.
Norris Karate Studio, Norfilk VA
While watching these political hot August nights, I decided to research the reasons why Chuck Norris is unable to separate the facts from the fantasy. What I discovered is that there are indeed dirty little secrets buried deep within the twisted mind of Walker, Texas Ranger.
Dirty Secret #1: Chuck Norris opposed the Children’s Aid Society. The very concept of looking out for the well-being of society’s youngest and most vulnerable fills Norris with outrage and hate. Although to be fair to Chuck Norris, his ground state is pretty muich full of outrage and hate.
Dirty Secret #2: Chuck Norris is unable to count to two. When making a list starting with #1, the very next item should be…
Bottom Line: Chuck Norris is no wingnut. He’s not comparing Obama and health care reform to Hitler and Nazi-ism. He compares Obama to Stalin.
No comment was received from Stalin or Obama denying that they are the same person. Also, Bill Clinton had inappropriate relations with an intern.
Voluntary for states, voluntary for parents.
Silly lib, voluntary = mandatory. Just like the death panels, abortions, and sex-change operations.
Fuck, I’m so sick of this shit. I’m ready to either leave the country or kill a wingnut.
You’re forgetting Chuck Norris’s amazing powers of concentration and focus, second only to Burt Prelutsky’s.
Even so, Norris didn’t notice Section 562, which explicitly gives Death Panels the authority to throw kittens and babies into vats of sulfuric acid.
OT – back on the US Atty thing, that thing that TPM has absolutely no clue about, fumbling in the dark they are. Too be expected of bloggers.
Justin Elliot should have read the comments at Sadly, No! Now his amusing clip of Dana Perino not knowing anything (oh, there’s news for you </eyeroll>) is going to look silly when he has to update with the important part. The bit where Karl Rove drops the fact that he and Boosh where having “conversations” regarding the Cunningham and Renzi cases *sometime before Rove was working on that piece of “damage control” Dana’s engaged in*.
NOT KITTENS!!!
Darn I thought that meant I could volunteer to visit homes and decide who lives and who dies. Well, that ruins my plans for the weekend.
We should organize a group to go to any town hall meeting held by a Republican politician and express loudly and with great vitriol our disappointment over the lack of Shania Law, Re-education Camps and Gay Abortions. What’s taking so long?
You’ve lost, libs, you just don’t know it yet.
The healthcare bill is dead, dead, dead, DEAD.
Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.
My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.
Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.
I’m confused. So what is it exactly that Obama and Mrs. Norris have in common?
@Dragon-King: A bigger dick than Norris. I thought it was self-explanatory.
It’s starting to feel like 1993, isn’t it, libs?
Thanks TKfKM. In my new role as investigative reporter, I need things very clearly spelled out for me. Drawing conclusions is something that is left for the reader to do.
Now about these larde dicks, can we get some phtographic evidence? For journalism purposes of course.
large dicks. Wow, this reportin’ is hard. You gotta tipe on teh key korrexly.
Fortunately, there’s a Chief Editor (I think his name’s Korir) around here somewheres.
Oh by 1993 You mean a popular democratic presidenr and the Republicans on a Witchhunt to destroy him?
It turns out that Gladney is covered under his wife’s insurance and the plea for donations was just another fraud perpetrated by Gladney and his Lawyer. Although his lawyer says if people want to donate money to help out someone who is unemployed there is nothing fraudulent about that.
That’s just so awesomely symbolic of wingnuttery in general: venal and/or stupid people suckering other stupid and often venal people into parting with their money via dishonest and emotional appeals of solidarity against an imagined enemy. Because the patsies fear this imagined enemy is duplicitous and covetous of their “stuff”, they voluntarily give their “stuff” to duplicitous and covetous liars who are willing to agree with and repeat back to them the many, many ways they have been victimized and aggrieved by people poorer and even more powerless than themselves.
It’s like a freakin’ parable of modern conservatism.
Someone needs to take Chuckles , stuff him in a large paper bag , and force him to act his way out of it.
I’m pretty sure that would be the last we ever see of him.
Nah, the Republik Party wasn’t quite the chicken with its head cut off in 1993 that it is now. I agree, it’s extremely puzzling trying to figure out why Troofie’s gloating.
I’m confused.
So this guy got attacked by some acorns and now we have to buy him a new barbeque grill ’cause otherwise Sarah Palin’s grandma will be thrown into a vat of acid?
The healthcare bill is dead, dead, dead, DEAD.
What brings you more glee at that thought, the idea that some insurance CEO who wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire is getting even richer over the scam his industry is or the thought that, somewhere, a poor minority child might die because his family’s insurance plan wouldn’t cover whatever medical care he needed? Be honest, now.
Also, isn’t Chuck Norris a Hollywood Celebrity? The fuck are we listening to his elitist, doesn’t-have-a-real-job ass for?
See, no, I think the way it works is, it’s not okay for Sean Penn, Tim Robbins, Leonardo DiCaprio and Susan Sarandon to share their views because they can actually ACT, and would do well to stick to that, or something. It definitely explains why they think it’s okay to give a forum to Chuck Norris, Stephen Baldwin or Lorenzo Lamas.
Someone needs to take Chuckles , stuff him in a large paper bag , and force him to act his way out of it. I’m pretty sure that would be the last we ever see of him.
Nooo! Ingnut-way occessor-pray. Shhhh. Don’t tip the trolls.
“somewhere, a poor minority child might die because his family’s insurance plan wouldn’t cover whatever medical care he needed? ”
If the illegal shits don’t like it, they can go back to Mexico way. I didn’t ask them to come here and I’m not going to use my tax money to cater to their needs.
I’m glad Troofie is conceding that minorities=illegal immigrants in his shriveled, drug-addled mind. You’d think someone who hated black people this much would do better at remembering they existed.
So this guy got attacked by some acorns and now we have to buy him a new barbeque grill ’cause otherwise Sarah Palin’s grandma will be thrown into a vat of acid?
Nice summary, Pere.
I juist uncovered a batch of Dana Perino’s haikus!
What branch for Cheney?
Exec or Legislative
Change like the seasons.
Pardon for Libby?
Why would the White House know that?
Like aspens turning.
And my personal favourite:
Cuba has missiles?
You’ve got to be shitting me.
Cuba? Fucking hell.
Even so, Norris didn’t notice Section 562, which explicitly gives Death Panels the authority to throw kittens and babies into vats of sulfuric acid.
Another DAMN LIE!!! Man, read it closer, it’s only the NON-CUTE ones, as judged by a special Twink Death Panel consisting of Sasha and Malia and a rotating teen celeb, such as Hannah Montana.
If the blacks don’t like it, they can move to Africa. Oh wait I forgot, Africa is a shithole. Well, too fucking bad.
HOLYSHITTROOFIEISSARAHPALIN
Okay, so your racism trumps your tendency to lick boots. Good to know.
Computers have an obvious liberal bias. Real conservatives do not use them. It’s that simple. If you love Jesus, you will never touch a keyboard again. If you love Michael Moore and Satan, you will keep using the internet as you have been.
Argue with my point if you can. See, you can’t.
usurping parental rights over child care and development.
So the feds are going to molest wingnut kids instead of letting the w’nuts do it themselves? SOCIALISM!
rotating teen celeb, such as Hannah Montana.
Does Montana rotate? She seems pretty static to me.
Don’t kid yourself, Matt; he’ll eventually pull it to both of those scenarios.
Jeez , someone needs to stuff Troofie in a large bag and make him THINK his way out. I’ll bet he’ll be in his bag longer than is pal Chuckles.
I always though boot-licking and racism were co-morbid. You know, along with Cheeto Breath and poor language skills.
Well done, Pere. My explanation was a bit too dry and academic – yours illustrates the concept in a (sadly) real-world scenario.
Even so, Norris didn’t notice Section 562, which explicitly gives Death Panels the authority to throw kittens and babies into vats of sulfuric acid.
But I would say this is more than balanced by section 667, which provides coverage for when you hurt your foot while totally round-housing a dude right in the face for like no apparent reason.
And yes I like profits. Big, fat fucking profits. Do you think rich people who get those profits just put the money into a bonfire and burn it? No, they SPEND it, and the spending stimulates the economy and employs losers like you in their new investments.
Fucking fools.
The more obscene and big the profit is for a CEO, the better for all of us.
Could someone please throw a butterfly net over Troofus teh Doofus and take him away to the FEMA camp now? The sooner we can give him his gay abortion the better.
Or, what the hell, just ban im. I’m easy.
The sooner we can give him his gay abortion the better.
He’ll fulfill his court-jester destiny better if we give him a socialist sex-change.
How the fuck would you know what rich people do with their money?
The more obscene and big the profit is for a CEO, the better for all of us.
You missed your time, man. You would’ve made a killer serf. It’s almost unfortunate none of those CEO’s will ever even glance in your direction. Back in the old days when you worshipped the rich and powerful and ruthless, you at least knew your daughter might get raped by your lord or something. Bet that keeps you up nights, huh.
Twoofie…
I’ve just met a troll who’s named Twoofie…
And suddenly the thread
Will very much be dead
To me…
Has anyone outside a He-Man cartoon used “fools” as an insult without being a pompous shithead?
Didn’t think so.
Do you think rich people who get those profits just put the money into a bonfire and burn it?
Number I. This is parody troll. Problem is, parody is supposed to be funny. This guy would piss off Andy Kaufman.
Numero a, subsection 8) Housing bubble.
How the fuck would you know what rich people do with their money?
He read about it, just like he got his education in the female mysteries from “Penthouse Letters”.
Do you think rich people who get those profits just put the money into a bonfire and burn it?
Perhaps we should revive the tradition of potlatch.
Involuntary potlatch. I’ll get the matches.
“hot August nights” – its been colder than a witches’ tit here all summer. Where the fuck does Chuck live anyway?
“Do you think rich people who get those profits just put the money into a bonfire”
No they pay me to suck their cock. I love to suck little rich cocks. Rich people are my whole reason for existence.
Has anyone outside a He-Man cartoon used “fools” as an insult without being a pompous shithead?
Didn’t think so.
I’m totally going to do that next time the pizza dude gets lost trying to find my place. “Fools! It’s the second apartment on the right! The rich don’t use street numbers!”
Back in the old days when you worshipped the rich and powerful and ruthless, you at least knew your daughter might get raped by your lord or something.
He’s been desperately offering droit de seigneur to every CEO on the Forbes 500, but so far they all expect him to actually have a bride.
“its been colder than a witches’ tit here all summer. Where the fuck does Chuck live anyway?”
So much for the Algore and global warning, huh?
Do you think rich people who get those profits just put the money into a bonfire and burn it?
Didn’t one of the WorldCom guys buy a $6000 shower curtain?
Matt T. the real “Lords” today are government beaurocrats.
Twoofie…
I’ve just met a troll who’s named Twoofie…
And suddenly the thread
Will very much be dead
To me…
T-woof-ie
Say it slow and it sounds idiotic
Say it fast and you know he’s psychotic
T-woof-ie
The “Lords” are government bureaucrats, moochers, Union bosses, racial power groups, and Democrat Congressmen and YOU are their serfs.
N__B: I’ll gladly hand over all my tax dollars and the CEO trickle-down fortune I acquired during the Reagan years, to pay for his socialist sex-change.
These anti-health care reform idiots are really too dumb to live.
“hot August nights” – its been colder than a witches’ tit here all summer. Where the fuck does Chuck live anyway?
Maybe here in Georgia, where it’s hot and totally unneccessarily humid. Feels like Mississippi, and if I wanted that, I would’ve stayed in Mississippi.
Government BUREAUCRATS could do no wrong a year ago, when you worshipped the ones in the Executive Branch and the Cheney Branch.
N__B: I’ll gladly hand over all my tax dollars and the CEO trickle-down fortune I acquired during the Reagan years, to pay for his socialist sex-change.
I’ll chip in my W tax rebate.
The summer has been cold, the Earth is cooling, and Algore’s scare tactics are being shown for the bullshit they are.
“So much for the Algore and global warning, huh?”
Dude, you got some cash? I’ll make you cum like Old Yeller. You’ll so be a naturalist when I’m done with you.
@ Poor Cock Sucker
Do you accept payments in kind?
Chuck checks Facts! Facts check Chuck! Chuck High Sticks Facts! Facts knocked unconscious! Chuck ejected!
The summer has been cold, the Earth is cooling, and Algore’s scare tactics are being shown for the bullshit they are.
Tell that to my friends in the Pacific Northwest, who’ve been roasting all summer with way higher than normal temps. The weather where you live is not the weather for the whole planet, dumbass. Climate does not equal weather. Also. And so forth.
racial power groups
Swedish body building teams?
Minority-run electrical co-ops?
Reggae heavy metal bands?
Do you accept payments in kind?
Hey, we’re socialists here. Next time I have two blow-jobs, I’ll give you one.
Hey, Libs Lose on Healthcare–Again… the libs don’t want you to know this, but plants just loooooooooove them electrolytes.
Just face it libs the conservatives are DOMINATING the debate, even the MSM admits it with their heavy coverage. They can’t deny it. We’re WINNING, asswipes.
Suck it!
Woops – I meant Old Faithful not Old yeller. Cumming like like old yeller doesn’t make a lot of sense. I’m not into bestiality. I have standards..
DOMINATING in all capital letters is hot!
The summer has been cold
Boy, don’t I fucking WISH.
That’s about as stupid as claiming that climate change is false because it’s winter in Australia.
And before you start babbling about “they thought the Earth was cooling back in the Seventies”, no they didn’t.
If at first you don’t succeed, redefine what you did as success!
Well Yeller did come faithfully. Best doggone dog in the West. Until Timmy or Jimmy had to cock his father’s rifle and shoo… say, was that really a Disney movie?
the conservatives are DOMINATING the debate
If they are, it’s the only way they know how – shouting until nobody else can get a word in.
Fascists. Plain and simple. Fascists.
I have a question for the regulars. So, right now, people pay premiums (premia?) to insurance companies, who promise to pay for certain necessary medication and medical procedures. The companies make money on the gamble that they will receive more in premiums than they will have have to pay out for treatments. Thus, it is in the company’s best interest to deny coverage whenever possible.
Of course, getting a reputation for denying coverage is bad for business. However, by teaming up with employers, insurance companies can get access to employees who may not have any other options for insurance. Thus, the results of a bad reputation can be ameliorated.
In short, insurance companies have a major incentive to limit coverage as much as possible and limit individual choice as much as possible.
So, my two-part question is this:
a) Is this an accurate summary?
b) How is this preferable to a system in which another option exists? Especially an option run by an entity that is not trying to make a profit and therefore has less incentive to second-guess doctors’ and patients’ decisions?
I guess I just don’t get wingnuts.
“Fascists. Plain and simple. Fascists.”
Cry some more, moonbat. Your tears are delicious! Suck it!
The bestiality on this thread leaves me cold.
Won’t SOMEONE suck it? Please? Craigslist didn’t work as well as I’d hoped, so this is my last resort that doesn’t involve leaving the basement. So, my last resort.
We won. We fucking won this the same way you won the election. Through buying it, through lying, through thuggish “community organizer” behavior, and through manipulating the MSM. Sucks to have your own tactics turned on you doesn’t it?
How do you like them apples, libs?
a) Is this an accurate summary?
Pretty much. Also, they can use their profits to buy Congress, media, etc. and game the system even more in their favor.
I guess I just don’t get wingnuts.
Hate isn’t logical, but exploiting it is profitable. History, etc.
Valkyr –
a) More or less. I run a small business and my insurance carrier dangles carrots of lower rates if I keep my employees from making claims. Since the reason I pay for the goddamned insurance is so that said employees will not get sick and die unnecessarily, I fail (in the insurance company’s view) to play my role properly.
b) It isn’t unless you’re insane.
Has anyone outside a He-Man cartoon used “fools” as an insult without being a pompous shithead?
Even when used inside a He-Man cartoon, “fools” makes you sound like a pompous shithead.
It’s like a freakin’ parable of modern conservatism.
This, times infinity.
You a German, badger? Go back to Europe, Kraut.
“Chuck Norris is so tough his head is nothing but rock”
Oh come ON! Chuck Norris’ head is so tough, rock cringes when he does a headstand.
I’ll take Skeletor over Troofie any day. At least he was comfortable with his sexuality.
“my last resort that doesn’t involve leaving the basement.”
Sorry, I don’t do basements.
“Your tears are delicious!”
Thank you, thank you. Hurt me again, daddy. Say it. Say it. Call me “commie” one more time.
(It would be good if you’d go to the gym occasionally.)
Until Timmy or Jimmy had to cock his father’s rifle
Veiled PENIS reference reminds me – there’s a new book on that table of Christian propaganda where I work that I mentioned a while back. The title is something about “The Wonderful World of Boys”, by James Dobson.
No word on whether there’s a shower scene involved. I ain’t lookin’.
We won. We fucking won this the same way you won the election. Through buying it, through lying, through thuggish “community organizer” behavior, and through manipulating the MSM. Sucks to have your own tactics turned on you doesn’t it?
Oh really?
Cuz, you know…the polls I’m seeing indicate that Congress will be passing a very nice package in September, and you’ll win this the way John McCain swept all fifty states.
Congress will be passing a very nice package in September
Veiled COLON reference.
insurance companies have a major incentive to limit coverage as much as possible
You got it.
As I keep saying, bureaucrats standing between you and your doctor rationing health care? WE HAVE THEM ALREADY.
“Cuz, you know…the polls I’m seeing indicate that Congress will be passing a very nice package in September, ”
Business week said a very watered down version will be passed, without a public option Trojan Horse, and that it will mean BIG PROFITS for insurers! Business Week said the heads of the health care industry are smiling from ear to ear right now.
Business Week also said, “Invest in Real Estate!!!”
Cry some more, moonbat. Your tears are delicious! Suck it!
Oh, honey, YOU said you’d suck it this week. I did do all the dishes, after all.
Don’t forget the teeth, honeybuns. You know I like it like that.
“Business Week said the heads of the health care industry are smiling from ear to ear right now.”
You have the best inside information. You are certainly a genius. Can I do you in the ass now?
Can I do you in the ass now?
You’ll run the risk of getting one of his opinions all over your dick.
Wait… we WON last time? I thought here was how it went down, libs: first the results from North Carolina and Virginia came in, and they were declared for McCain. We were disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” was our comment. Florida went red, and a little nervousness crept in. The usual suspects fell into the usual categories. As the night dragged on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania were too close to call. At this point we went to bed. We woke up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout was on. Do I have that about right, Troof?
We won. We fucking won this the same way you won the election. Through buying it, through lying, through thuggish “community organizer” behavior, and through manipulating the MSM. Sucks to have your own tactics turned on you doesn’t it?
How do you like them apples, libs?
(crunch, crunch, crunch) Hmmmm, needs more schadenfreude.
Global warming dur, dur, dur…
Here in the Northeast, this cold, wet summer is wiping out crops. Small, local farmers fear that if next year makes three bad years in a row then a lot of these farms will disappear. And this is land that has been cultivated for centuries. Meanwhile, migrant farm hands (who work harder than Trolly McNutgargle ever has or will) end up with no harvest work as crops get plowed under due to moisture-driven blight.
So are you a German, Badger?
‘Cuz I like to fuck Germans.
OT: Hey, Red Badger, I’m going to a place called Badger Creek tonight to watch the Perseid meteor shower. Can I say hello to any of your Badgers of Courage while I’m there?
I’ve always liked your nym.
Fuck family farms. We can grow food much more efficiently in big, modern, corporate agribusiness complexes. Creative destruction, libs!
And do you know what they will build on top of those “family farms”? Wal-Marts, subdivisions, golf courses, and SPRAWL! That must piss off you libs soooo much!
You talkin’ to me, fuck face? I’ll be whatever ethnicity you need me to be.
Wal-Marts, subdivisions, golf courses, and SPRAWL! That must piss off you libs soooo much!
Only until we can hotwire one of the bulldozers and take it all down. As you said, “Creative destruction”!
Wal Mart sounds kind of German. Heil Sam! You don’t have to put family farms in quotes. They really do exist in living museums. Speaking of which, how do feel about Old Agnes, our goat? Pretty hot some days ? No?
The conservatives better hope that the dream scenario they envision doesn’t really come to pass. Sooner or later, angry mobs would be storming the gated commmunities, and the Troofies of this world would be pretty much fucked. Well, the masters of the Troofies, anyway. The actual lickers-of-rich-dick Troofies would have long since starved to death along with the not-crazy poor people.
Again, these people are too dumb to live.
Go ahead, Candy. I’ve missed my bretheren Badgers.
Oh. So that’s how Chinatown ends. Thanks for spoiling it, Libs.
“ROSEBUD” WAS HIS SLED!
Tom Tomorrow explains Troofus: http://www.salon.com/comics/tomo/2009/08/11/tomo/
I just hope they’re astronomy minded badgers!
The meteor shower is supposed to be excellent tonight. It’s clear and still hot here but will probably be down to mid 70s by midnight. One good thing about living in a relatively small metro area is that you can get out in the dark countryside without driving too far.
I am reminded of a guy I met while canvassing for the ACLU. We got into a discussion about detention and torture and wiretapping and all that. The guy said something along the lines of “They do that to us; they spy on their own people.” My response was, of course, that we aren’t “them.” The whole point in taking pride in being American is that American ideals should not involve torture, wiretapping, and indefinite detention without charges. They guy then straight up said, “Might makes right.”
Exact words.
I am reminded because of our resident tantrum-thrower’s apparent lack of any ideals, or pride in his integrity, or any of that. It’s all about his team winning, no matter how dirty they have to play, no matter who or how many people they wind up screwing (figuratively, as I doubt our little friend usually succeeds in getting laid).
Actually, I read this book a while back called The Education of T.C. MITS. Although it was a book about math, it made a point somewhere near the beginning about different kinds of loyalty. One is loyalty to ideas and ideals—the loyalty of a human. The other was loyalty to a group or an authority—the loyalty of a dog. Nothing against dogs, but those of us with human-sized cerebral cortices should do better than that.
Sorry to be so long-winded.
“Troofies of this world would be pretty much fucked”
This has been my point.
Did Libs Lose go to bed? Cause my offer still stands.
There’s a lot of Republicans who find themselves unable to pass a nice package by….
the polls I’m seeing indicate that Congress will be passing a very nice package in September, and you’ll win this the way John McCain swept all fifty states.
Hush, now! Every little bit of premature MISSION ACCOMPLISHED/BOOKMARKET LEEBZ is like and extra dollop of whipped cream on Trollie’s inevitable pie in the face.
One right-wing fuckstick is starting to feel the backlash.
“”On Tuesday, August 4, GEICO instructed its ad buying service to redistribute its inventory of rotational spots on FOX-TV to their other network programs, exclusive of the Glenn Beck program,” said a spokesperson for GEICO Corporate Communications in an email to ColorOfChange.org. “As of August 4, GEICO no longer runs any paid advertising spots during Mr. Beck’s program.”
This is the latest big advertiser to pull ads from Beck’s program. And it’s an insurance company.
Meanwhile, Timmy and Sally said they would no long give free lemonade to Trolly to wear the sandwich board advertising their lemonade stand on East Glenview Road.
That’s what Trolly gets for spanking it every time they come near.
You stupid libs. As long as they still advertise on Fox, Fox still makes big bucks, and they pay those big bucks to Beck. Hell, Murdoch loses money on the New York Post, but he prints it anyway!
Beck WILL remain on the air. Fools.
ADHD troll has ADHD. I hope that gets deemed a pre-existing condition and he ends up without coverage. It will be at this point that he discovers a faceful of CEO jizz is not the miracle drug he believed it to be.
And do you know what they will build on top of those “family farms”? Wal-Marts, subdivisions, golf courses, and SPRAWL! That must piss off you libs soooo much!
So that’s your heartland, eh?
Hell, Murdoch loses money on the New York Post, but he prints it anyway!
Boy, what a great businessman HE is.
*snerk*
When this health care plan passes — and to this extent I won’t give a shit how watered down it is — I will drink to all the right wing teabagging Southern infantile redneck maniacs who will be crying in their hankees and pooping their pants. I’ll raise my drink and laugh at all of them, over and over and over until somebody drives me home. It’s gonna be awesome.
Thanks, Badger, for reminding me how many bills Obama has tried to pass that have gone down in defeat.
And it was a real disappointment that his Supreme Court nominee was so roundly rejected by the Senate.
Guess you won those, just like you predicted.
No, really?
“Fuck family farms!” No way. You don’t understand, the whole Cheeto crop is being plowed under. Beautiful fields of waving florescent orange falling under the cold steel of a John Deere seven blade plow. It’s heartbreaking. And the Ramen crop has a blight. It’s next.
“Fuck family farms!” No way.
Damn straight. One doesn’t fuck farms. One fucks pigs, sheep, and the occasional goat.
What?
“Occasional” goat? Wha?
I once (hell, probably more than once) commented that the mass ass-rape of Twoofie here was boring and or irritating, but now it’s starting to look like something more ominous– Sadlynaughts are, in fact, lining up to fall face-first into Twoofie’s greasy, orange-stained crotch and suck like a piglet at the teat.
Does he secretly ejaculate heroin or something?
“Occasional” goat? Wha?
Sometimes they’re goats. Sometimes they’re sirens: blinding in their beauty, irresistible in their song, grace personified in their dance.
It depends on how many PBRs you’ve pounded.
Hey, do you think if Obama and the congresscritters rename the health care reform bills, to something like, “The We Changed Our Minds, We Really DO Want to Bomb Iran Act,” do you think the wingnuts will shut up about all of it? I’m not saying they should change the contents of the bill, just the name.
Sure, it will look bad outside of these shores, but at this point, I think the rest of the world will understand.
“When Sonia Sotomayor is sworn in Saturday to the Supreme Court, she’ll be able to claim two firsts: first Hispanic justice and first high court member to have her oath-taking made available to TV cameras.”
Also.
“Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor.”
Has a very nice ring to it. It sounds like: Conservative FAIL.
Nope, because Obama’s still blackity-black, and if Operation Iraqi Meatgrinder taught us anything, it’s that only white people are allowed to kill brown people.
Does he secretly ejaculate heroin or something?
Out of curiousity. Do you *contribute* anything to a thread other than this comment, over and over again?
“Blah blah blah, you suck the troll’s cock, I’m above it all, blah.”
Fucking say something unique, would you kindly? I don’t care what it is, I don’t care if you decide to start harping on me, just write something other than some iteration of your current shtick.
Brandi, I’m probably not the one you want to talk to. I’ve been on both sides of the trolls.
But you know, here’s the thing. you’re free to add whatever you want to the threads. Be on-topic, off-topic, or troll-topic. You can killfile anybody that you feel feeds the trolls too much. And others are also free to add whatever they want to the thread. Which, until the Overseers want to operate in a different fashion, includes slapping our Resident Idiot around.
But you know what? Troofy doesn’t care, he keeps posting no matter how people respond. It sometimes seems he posts MOAR when people ignore him. But occasionally, epic Funny Fail comes out of his pie-hole (LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL) when one of the regulars drives him into frenzy. It’s also good practice for my in-laws, now that I think of it; they usually use the same weak sauce arguments.
He does, however, enjoy feeling like he has driven someone to despair over his interventions. It’s a meager success, but it’s likely all he has. So if anyone is “Feeding” the troll, it’s you.
But in the end you, and I , and fucking Troofy-Goober are all welcome to stay or go.
MMMMmmmmm. Zombie in-laws covered with weak sauce…..[drool]
There’s got to be a name for the kind of troll Brandi is.
Stay the hell away from me, verdammtes Nazischwein. Die echten Sozialisten werden deinen wertlosen Arsch versohlen!
There’s got to be a name for the kind of troll Brandi is.
When a purity troll and a concern troll love each other very much…
“Killjoy” would about cover it.
Troofie’s still phoning it in.
I wonder if it gets paid less if its Blog Warrior spume is stuff like “LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL”? I mean, it’s hard to imagine that paid irritants have quality control, but there’s gotta be something.
Once again we see that wingnuts do not understand the term “voluntary”. Voluntary counseling means that the government, which I envision looking like Walter Peck from Ghostbusters accompanied by a central casting[1] MiB, shows up at your house and tries to convince you to (take a lethal overdose | have your children injected with autism juice[2]). Whereas forcing prisoners to undergo humiliating and pants-shittingly scary ordeals is okay, because some people (frat boys) do that voluntarily. Heck, some people (David Vitter) *pay* for it! And hey, you liberals LOOOOVE the homos, so what’s wrong with sticking a glow stick up some haji’s ass, right?
[1] apropos of
nothingdrinking, I have long thought that “Chad Kroger” is the name a lazy screenwriter would give to the frat boy who dies of alcohol poisoning in the first five minutes of the movie.[2] God, this “vaccines cause autism” thing, wtf? Are these the same people who use colloidal silver instead of medicine, or the people who use water that used to be near a plant instead of medicine?
Until the forms are signed in triplicate and sent to The President Himself for approval the demons must remain in the child.
Ain’t that Norris feller one o’ them elitist Hollywood actor types?
I thought they were supposed to “Just shut up!” about politics?
Because the GUBMINT can’t do anything right, you know. Like the Post Office — I pay 42 cents to send a letter across the country in a couple of days, but they are sometimes inconvenient! Also killing a whole bunch of people! somewhere far away! the Army can do that IT IS THE BEST ARMY, U! S! A! U! S! A!, but the Army is different from the gubmint because they have a Tradition of Heritage and my dad’s uncle’s brother-in-law was wounded in combat (well, basic training, but close enough) so I know what I’m talking about; what have YOU done for the Homeland?
An example of the loony Left. Which is irksome, but there it is. However, it illustrates the difference between moonbats and wingnuts.
The Democratic party isn’t run by the moonbats. Far from it. But the wingnuts own the GOP.
Anti-vaccination moonbats can’t call the shots in party primaries like, say, anti-choice wingnuts can.
Basing a presidential primary campaign on a promise to free Mumia isn’t going to swing a block of voters.
I hate WP “preview”, which doesn’t.
Ah, fuck me. I just ate a French caramel de fleur de sel, and popped a crown off my lower right molar.
Ah, fuck me.
um, not until you get those teeth fixed.
actually, I feel your pain. cherry pit, crumbled tooth around filling, a few jagged edges that I could NOT keep my tongue from rubbing against.
An example of the loony Left.
I wonder if these people can even be termed ‘Left’. I tend to think of them as just confused. Plus this is really an anti-science view, which is much more honored on the right side of the political spectrum.
Until the forms are signed in triplicate and sent to The President Himself for approval the demons must remain in the child.
I need an old Assistant District Superintendent and a young Public Outreach Technologist III. The power of Schedule 7 of Form 331(b) compels you!
[1] apropos of nothing drinking, I have long thought that “Chad Kroger” is the name a lazy screenwriter would give to the frat boy who dies of alcohol poisoning in the first five minutes of the movie.
I’ve had this theory about the name “Chad” ever since I worked for a particularly stupid, shallow assistant manager of that name. And this was at Wal-Mart, where even his stupid shallowness shone out like a dead fish on the beach. Then a couple months later we had a particularly incompetent waiter at Applebee’s. Guess what is name was?
Apologies to anyone here named “Chad” (except for Twoofie, whose real name that probably is) but that’s MAH THEEEEEORY and I’m sticking with it.
[2] God, this “vaccines cause autism” thing, wtf? Are these the same people who use colloidal silver instead of medicine, or the people who use water that used to be near a plant instead of medicine?
Yes on both counts. Gotta take yourself away from the so-called “doctors” who’re feeding you formaldehyde and mercury in their so-called “medicines”.
One just hopes more wingnuts take up the whole collidal silver thing so when they get argyria it’ll be easier to avoid them – just look for the blue people.
God, this “vaccines cause autism” thing, wtf?
An example of the loony Left.
Actually, Jack Welch, arch-conservative former chairman of GE who screamed at his MSNBC newsdesk for calling the 2000 election for Al Gore, is the head of Autism Speaks! and his wife founded the organization.
There’s got to be a name for the kind of troll Brandi is.
I think she qualifies as a concern troll, albeit not the classic version.
Chuck Norris is such a liar his lies are untrue.
Chuck Norris should shut up and sing…except that his voice is awful and he probably can’t carry a tune, so he should just…shut up, already.
Also, FYWP.
Are these the same people who use colloidal silver instead of medicine, or the people who use water that used to be near a plant instead of medicine?
HA! Yes.
Antivax wackosity can be found all over the spectrum. The Left is more “Big Pharma blar har har” dipshits, and the right is more “the Power of Jesus (Praise Jesus!) will heal my daughter’s cancer” idiots, but they’re all bugfuck insane. But as Joe Max said, at least the Left’s anti-science loons are marginalized.
Between Cash for Clunkers and the anti-incest policy exposed in the clip, I would say that the Obama administration is trying to destroy traditional, conservative Southron culture.