Personally, I Would Have Gone With ‘Impudent Ingrate’
Caribou Barbie could take a lesson from Dick Cheney — you’re supposed to shoot the other guy in the face, not yourself.
But that’s not what I’m here to talk about.
Rather, it’s a wonderful new column from the Moonie Times’ Diana West:
Iraq is Victorious… Over the ‘Foreign’ U.S.?
I’ve been stewing over something really lousy that Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki has been saying since June 20: that Iraqis have won a “great victory” over the “foreign presence in Iraq.”
That “great victory,” as he calls it, is the June 30 withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq’s cities. That “foreign presence,” as he calls it, is the United States — the thousands of mainly young American men who have fought a vicious enemy under the harshest conditions for more than six long years, with 4,321 Americans killed, many thousands wounded, often grievously so, and some small, tortured number wrongfully ensnared by the U.S. military justice system in apparent deference to Iraqi political considerations.
“Ingrate” doesn’t begin to describe this al-Maliki creep — or, as all too many conservatives and Bush loyalists persist in thinking of him, our Iraqi “ally.” But let’s skip the labels and stick to the implications of the Iraqi prime minister’s rhetoric: He has transformed long-term American sacrifice on Iraq’s behalf into a residual “foreign presence” over which he now declares Iraqi victory.
Speaking of Cheney, he really has been doing his bit to keep the spirit of 2005 alive — and in the frankly dull Age of Obama, this has not been unappreciated by liberal comedy bloggers. Mocking garden-variety stupidity is one thing, but stupidity that is in a position of authority is the real mother lode … I’ve been pretty much mailing it in since the election because teasing the politically marginalized just doesn’t instill one with the same sense of purpose, no matter how venal the wingnuts remain.
Which is why Diana West’s little diatribe caught my attention. The scare quotes around ‘foreign’ are pleasing enough, but trotting out ‘ingrate’ really puts this bit over the top — it’s a throwback to a time when the invasion of Iraq was still being defended by its architects as a great victory for human rights, a little trip down memory lane for anyone who ever felt the guilty thrill of encountering a particularly juicy example of the up-is-downism that propped up that earlier era’s conventional wisdom on aggressive war.
It brings some small joy to my heart to see that someone out there in wingnuttia is still defending our Baghdad satrapy in the old, neocon fashion — by flat-out denying that our occupation of another country is really an occupation, that we are not gate-crashing foreigners in Iraq at all but rather invited guests who occasionally shoot our hosts and blow up their property.
The Bush years were awful, of course, but you have to admit they were also awfully fun. Almost enough to make me want to tempt fate and hope for Cheney-Palin in 2012, if only just to relieve the ennui.
Cheney was already Unitard Executive for eight long, disaster-filled years, with a drunken shield to pardon him if things got bad. Why on earth would he tolerate a grandstanding loser who can’t even read her lines right? She makes W looklike a Shakespearean thespian.
The Bush years were awful, of course, but you have to admit they were also awfully fun
You misspelled “calamitous”.
Almost enough to make me want to tempt fate and hope for Cheney-Palin in 2012, if only just to relieve the ennui.
Mr. Aristophanes, please put down whatever you are smoking. I’m sure you’re just giddy from Mooseburger’s resignation. That’s no reason to lose your head.
Ingrate doesn’t even begin to describe the residents of a country that got the ever loving fuck bombed out of it, left in chaos and civil war for over half a decade with over 100,000 confirmed civilian deaths, treated not even as highly as second class citizens in their own war-torn, infrastructure-free country – where jackasses in APCs taunt children with bottles of water – making them run after it only to laugh and laugh, and let’s not even atart in on the fucking mercenary fucking rat bastards or the delightful “spa treatments” given for free to all them detainees…
FUCK YOU DIANA WEST!
Cheney will be dead by 2012; there’s no way in hell Palin will run for anything less than
Queenthe top of the ticket. Speculation about her Veep candidate could be amusing. I like Bachmann, but Jindal would be cool too.To hell w/ women, & the furriners in the “Coalition of the Willing,” right Diana? All about AMERIKKKA!!
..and some small, tortured number wrongfully ensnared by the U.S. military justice system in apparent deference to Iraqi political considerations.
Normally, I’m an atheist but I think today I will indulge in a little religion and imagine you immersed in the deep end of a lake of boiling blood.
Oooh, that feels nice…
Don’t forget the millions of ingrate homeless refugees!
It really is like these people don’t know what words mean: “How can they call us “foreigners” when we’re in their country?!! We’re not foreigners, we’re AMERICANS!!!”
Yes, also don’t forget the limbless children:
http://www.superpoop.com/011209/sorry-hassan.jpg
Yeah, I’m sure the Prime Minister will be all torn up over your slighted feelings over the lack of thanks you received for mutilating a nation’s spirit.
Fucking drama queens.
Pay no attention to the comments of that silly Maliki fellow. Most Iraqis are delighted by the many wonderful things that have happened in their country over the past six years. For example, here is a recent photo of a group of typical residents of Baghdad reacting to a proposed re-invasion of their country.
Fortunately for the conservative movement, blame for the ascent of this Al-Maliki ingrate to power can safely be directed at left-wing activists, i.e. ‘Bush loyalists’.
I remember the ingrate Kurt Schuschnigg and his ugly lack of appreciation for the brotherly actions of Germany in 1938.
I remember the ingrate Kurt Schuschnigg
I remember that he was pretty much a Nazi himself.
Hey y’all, innocent of the way of teh snark, am I, but is this a piss-take?
Friday, July 03, 2009
‘Did We Quit When the Germans Bombed Pearl Harbor?’
http://townhall.com/blog/g/75492859-cb59-4023-b932-cbecef370a55
Bad as those Iraqis certainly are, there is nothing, absolutely nothing, that can hold a candle to those Pakistanis for sheer, ornery ingratitude.
Devils walk among them. At risk of life and limb–or whatever it is that makes up that wonderful creature we call “the drone”–we strike those devils with bolts of lightning out of the clear-blue sky. But the Paks just bitch and scream! You don’t believe it? You better believe it! Just surf the news channels on your local tv set, and you’ll see them bitch and scream….
Funny thing about devils. They’re sort of like drag-queens. They like to “possess” women and children, and mostly at weddings at funerals. So we wipe out hundreds and hundreds of those creepy little drag queens,all decked out in brown skin underneath their burqas, and where, I ask you, where oh where is the heartfelt gratitude we’ve earned with the blood and sweat of our shiniest brows? I just ask you this one little question, WHERE OH WHERE IS THE GRATITUDE?
Christ…the Bush Administration was like the extermination company who takes care of your roach problem by burning down your house and killing your family, and then not only hands you the bill, but demands your gratitude for creating the conditions which “encourage” you to build a new house before winter comes.
What do you honestly expect when you illegally invade their country and bomb it back to the stone age. Not to mention the million dead Iraqi’s or more. Iraq didn’t ask you to free them. Why would anyone with half a brain expect them to be greatful for what we’ve done to their country and their people. Give me a break.
“Why would anyone with half a brain expect them to be greatful for what we’ve done to their country and their people.”
I think “half a brain” is being awfully generous in West’s case.
It’s not very original, but I want to see Diana dropped into Baghdad to explain to the folks on the street why they should be eternally grateful for all Cheney has done for them.
Yes, even though it makes me a bad person, I would like to see that very much.
Hey y’all, innocent of the way of teh snark, am I, but is this a piss-take?
I don’t know if conservatives are capable of piss-takes, but I find it hard to believe that even a Townhall blogger wouldn’t know that the fucking Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor, not Zee Germans.
…the Bush Administration was like the extermination company who takes care of your roach problem…
Yeah, and it turns out those roaches were actually just a couple of cat turds. Oops!
I believe that would be a reference to a line from John Belushi’s character in Animal House when he’s trying to rally his frat brothers. Why the author felt the need to do so, I have no idea.
@TandU, 5:07- Didn’t they bang the war drums based almost entirely on ignorance of who had bombed us 2 years prior? Asking them to go all the way back to 1940 or whatever when everyone wore faggy hats and there was no televised Ultimate Fighting is just wrong, sir… nay, unAmerican.
some small, tortured number wrongfully ensnared by the U.S. military justice system in apparent deference to Iraqi political considerations.
A persecuted white supremecist was tried for “murder” after stabbing a black man to death, no doubt due to the institutional racism of our judicial system.
A few poor multi-millionaires were robbed blind last week when the SEC fined them for unethical activites that wiped out several pension funds. The cynical calculus of modern politics doesn’t seem to assign a very high value to rich citizens.
I kn haz job?
Yeah, and it turns out those roaches were actually just a couple of cat turds. Oops!
They took care of the cat though.
Hey, a snappy fedora is NOT a “faggy hat.” A beret, may be qusetionable, but fedoras rule.
some small, tortured number wrongfully ensnared by the U.S. military justice system
Initially I misread Ms West’s column and thought she was acknowledging the suspects — while minimising their number — who’d been apprehended by US forces and tortured to death.
“Qusetionable” may be questionable as well. And that comma. It’s as if I didn’t care anymore.
Sarah Palin believes in Opposite Election.
West’s entire post is like some kind of cliche-ridden scene from a bad movie about old-school imperialism: you can picture this conversation taking place in the smoking room of the Olde Codgers’ Club in England in 1898 or so–just change “Iraq” to “South Africa” or “India” or something.
“By Jove, the damned n-gg-rs have gone too far this time, Lord Postlethwaite-Jones!”
Wow, sound like she wants to go to war against Iraq – again, for non-liberation purposes. That’ll learn ’em twice.
Mr. Aristophanes, please put down whatever you are smoking.
What, and burn through my pajamas?
Opposite Dead Fish. Also.
Sarah and Todd are simple fisherfolk, it’s true.
I too am a fisher, of dead men who don’t swim upstream.
Sarah and Todd are simple fisherfolk, it’s true.
yes, they remind me of This couple, fairy-tale grifters like the Palins.
“Husband,” said the woman, “have you caught nothing to-day?” “No,” said the man, “I did catch a Flounder, who said he was an enchanted prince, so I let him go again.” “Did you not wish for anything first?” said the woman. “No,” said the man; “what should I wish for?” “Ah,” said the woman, “it is surely hard to have to live always in this dirty hovel; you might have wished for a small cottage for us. Go back and call him. Tell him we want to have a small cottage, he will certainly give us that.” “Ah,” said the man, “why should I go there again?” “Why,” said the woman, “you did catch him, and you let him go again; he is sure to do it. Go at once.” The man still did not quite like to go, but did not like to oppose his wife, and went to the sea.
Snip. And so she wants more and more – she wants a castle, she wants to be a Queen, she wants to be an Empress, the Pope, finally –
“Husband,” she said, poking him in the ribs with her elbows, “wake up! go to the Flounder, for I wish to be even as God is.” The man was still half asleep, but he was so horrified that he fell out of bed….“Well, what does she want, then?” said the Flounder. “Alas,” said he, “she wants to be like unto God.” “Go to her, and you will find her back again in the dirty hovel.” And there they are living still at this very time.
Spot on, g. There’s a ‘nail soup’ quality to them as well.
How dare other countries call us “foreign”!!! Don’t they know they’re the foreign ones?
I’m surprised she forgot to call Maliki “unpatriotic” too.
I’d call you a selfish bastard if I thought you were serious. Meanwhile, this:
It brings some small joy to my heart to see that someone out there in wingnuttia is still defending our Baghdad satrapy in the old, neocon fashion — by flat-out denying that our occupation of another country is really an occupation, that we are not gate-crashing foreigners in Iraq at all but rather invited guests who occasionally shoot our hosts and blow up their property.
Was fine stuff.
And to think I respected her work in films and on Broadway.
Whoops! My mistake. I confused the author of the above screed with Dianne Wiest:
Cunt.
They should be THANKFUL for all we’ve done for them!
And I still demand they throw rose petals at our feet.
and some small, tortured number wrongfully ensnared by the U.S. military justice system in apparent deference to Iraqi political considerations.
My heart breaks for the cold-red-blooded American boys who are being tried for murder out of political correctness, when all they did was kidnap, bind, rape, and shoot in the head at point-blank range.
How were they supposed to know it was wrong?! Curse political correctness!
Like this sweetheart: http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-iraq-soldier30-2009jun30,0,2638861.story.
But no worries, his family and church have rallied behind him. Because that’s how we do it American, bitches.
He has transformed long-term American sacrifice on Iraq’s behalf into a residual “foreign presence” over which he now declares Iraqi victory.
The wingnuts are so pissed about Iraq’s lack of gratitude, they’re going to gear up to invade it all over again!
Especially since they’re now all champions of the Iranian people. Iraq is Iran’s historical enemy!
West’s entire post is like some kind of cliche-ridden scene from a bad movie about old-school imperialism:
Iraq is itself a creation of British Imperialism, a la Mr. Churchill himself. At the end of the Great War, the non-losing British Empire dismembered the somewhat-losing Ottoman Empire; Iraq was created by taking the provinces of Basra and Baghdad and drawing borders around them. Watching another group of clueless pasty-faced Anglos screw the place over again, 85 years later, was great for historical irony, but bad for everyone else.
Hey. Wit makes its own welcome, and levels all distinctions. No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit.
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Thank you so much for your future answers 8-). Brazil.