Who Can Argue With That Logic?
Here’s the latest from Pastor Swank:
9/11 REPORT REVEALS MURTHA / PELOSI WRONG
By J. Grant Swank, Jr.The 9/11 Commission lambaste underscores all the more that Congressmembers John Murtha and Nancy Pelosi are so off-center when it comes to New Iraq.
The Commission states that the US is not prepared for another Islamic killers attack. True. And it?s basically the fault of Congress.
Really? The Department of Homeland Security doesn’t share any blame? That’s funny, ’cause their mission statement says they’re supposed to “mobilize and organize our nation to secure the homeland from terrorist attacks.”
But then again, criticizing the DHS comes dangerously close to criticizing George W. Bush (a.k.a. “Jesus II”), so I can see why the good pastor would prefer to blame Congress.
Then why do Congressmembers such as Murtha and Pelosi rant that US troops must be brought home immediately? If they are, Islamic killers will swamp New Iraq with blood and then turn with major thrusts against the US.
Sounds kinky!
Yet the US is not prepared for Islamic attacks. So the logical conclusion at present is to remain in New Iraq where at least Islamic attacks are contained to that country with other sporadic attacks elsewhere. But to bring home the US troops immediately would hasten the Islamic killer attacks against the US.
Because really, there’s no better way to bring democracy to Iraq than by making it a haven for terrorists. And to be honest, I’d much rather let the terrorists thrust us in Iraq so they don’t have to thrust us here at home.
Above: What will happen if we leave the New Iraq.
Here’s another good one:
SAD CATHOLICS CALL HOMO CLERGY A CULT
By J. Grant Swank, Jr.In response to this post HOMOSEXUAL PRIESTS TURN HETEROSEXUALS AWAY, I received this response from a devout Roman Catholic:
“I am a life long 68 year old practicing Catholic that had no idea there were gay priests all over the place, even as Bishops and Cardinals surrounding our Pope.
I know I keep harping on this, but I love the fact that Pastor Swank’s fan mail is even more inarticulate and deranged than his actual columns.
“The book, ?Goodbye Goodmen,? by Michael Rose (www.goodbyegoodmen.com/) addressed all but the John Jay findings as it was written before the study results.
“I have read your work on the Muslim CULT. I have come to the conclusion in the past 3 years that the promiscuous sex HIV/AIDS gays are also a CULT unto themselves AND are the ACTIVISTS undermining the morals, free speech and religious intolerance now underway in our country.
My God, they’re undermining religious intolerance? What a bunch of douchebags!
“They have control of the ACLU with closeted gay lawyers.
Lawyers are bad enough on their own, but closted gay lawyers? Don’t even get me started…
“They are in complete control of the American Psychiatric Association that declared gays normative.
“They control sections of the IRS that are now threatening to take away tax exempt status of those in the pulpit and their free speech. An acquaintance of mine who worked at the IRS told me of a whole department of gays existing there.
“Yeah, those guys in the Appeals Department are such fags…”
“I say that this politically powerful and intimidating faction to our legislatures, the CULT of gays, is as much a threat to America as the Muslims.
“And despite the fact that it’d violate every single Constitutional principle, we should deport all of ’em!”
“We gave the ?gay culture? the benefit of the doubt in the Catholic Church and they sexually abused our children and bastardized our liturgy and canon law.
Take a step back and really think about this. He’s saying that all those priests molested children because the church was too tolerant of homosexuality. Really, just take it in for a second.
“I have now met the DEVIL of Islam and moral decay literally walking, sitting and living next to me.”
And I have met the WINGNUTTIEST guy on the planet, and he writes fan mail to Pastor Swank.
No, that’s too good.
You’ve been writing fake letters to Swanky again, haven’t you?
They are in complete control of the American Psychiatric Association that declared gays normative.
Assuming he meant ‘normal’, he forgot the American Academy of Pediatrics, American Counseling Association, American Medical Association, American Psychological Association, American School Health Association, Council on Child and Adolescent Health, National Association of School Psychologists, and almost every other Western mental health organisation. They were all infiltrated by fags too.
He must write all the rubbish he presents as mail. Who else would say ‘promiscuous sex HIV/AIDS gays’?
I swear I haven’t. And even if I did, doesn’t it say something about the Pastor that he saw it fit to print???
It’s not, “the” New Iraq. It’s just, New Iraq.
This will soon become, Nuirack.
This in turn will become, Nurack.
Which will become, Narock.
Which will eventually be known as, Ragnarock.
That’s the exit strategy – we allow consonental shift to turn the place into the end of all things, thus meaning we need never worry about what happens after the occupation is over. This has the added benefit of being a back-up plan for ending the world if the Jews let us down and don’t stage that Rapture thing in Jerusalem.
I think New Iraq is somewhere in the Northeast. All those liberals up there hate America so much anyway.
Things were so much better when it was just Adam, Eve (made from Adam’s rib, which sounds plenty gay to me) and the dinosaurs running around in Eden and not having sex.
I love how the good pastor insists on conflating homosexuals with pedofiles.
Nicely done, Pastor!
Oh my dog. Are you sure those letters weren’t written by General JC Christian?
A genius post. The first letter was an excellent of rabid blathering of a common sort. I enjoyed the artist’s rendition of the Islamofacist turning with major thrusts against that trumpet-lamp thing.
But the second letter! Wow! That one had me rolling. “Hello, IRS Department of Gays, if you have a few minutes, I’d sure like to go over your extended form, honey!”
“I have read your work on the Muslim CULT. I have come to the conclusion in the past 3 years that the promiscuous sex HIV/AIDS gays are also a CULT unto themselves AND are the ACTIVISTS undermining the morals, free speech and religious intolerance now underway in our country.
Yeah, since a group of people who pretend that pastry is the flesh of their resurrected messiah could NEVER be called a cult . . .
Sorry, a little bit bitter. These people drive me effing crazy.
“An acquaintance of mine who worked at the IRS told me of a whole department of gays existing there.”
The Department of Teh Gay.
“And they had much better furniture than the other departments, and you could smell potpourri!”
So let’s see, first they infiltrate the APA and get themselves declared “normative”, then they undermine that bastion of heterosexuality, the IRS (it’s an anagram for “sir”, don’t you see how it all fits together???) and revoke the tax exempt status of churches.
Somehow the IRS then also gets rid of their free speech, too.
I’m dying to find out step three of the nefarious “promiscuous sex HIV/AIDS gays'” plan, and what they hope to gain.
If there’s ever been an argument that elementary schools should teach “recognizing symptoms of mental illness” early and often, this guy would be it.
Awesome. I thought i’d heard it all, but the IRS is a haven for buttsex. Fucking Awesome.
What do you wanna bet he got audited last year?
Awesome. I thought i’d heard it all, but the IRS is a haven for buttsex. Fucking Awesome.
What do you wanna bet he got audited last year?
Yeah, I was really waiting for him to write, “the homosexual lobby has penetrated every crevice of the federal government!”
Launch the offensive!
Er, Pastor Swank, “the New Iraq” is already swamped with blood, thanks to your theocratic conservative pals stirring up a hornet’s nest over there. P.S. There used to be a film company in St. Louis which was, to the best of my knowledge, a producer of porno. The name was Swank Films. I can’t help thinking of that whenever I read his name.
“Which will eventually be known as, Ragnarock.”
actually, I’m reasonably sure that it will eventually become known as “Iran”. Now that we’ve ensured the Shi’ites are in charge of the country, does anybody expect it won’t get voluntarily annexed right after we leave?
New Iraq? So, basically, all we have to do is bring back Saddam and start calling it Classic Iraq (Iraq Classic?) and everything will be okay?
I’d have thought that letter-writer was my (still labor-Dem voting) grandpa if I didn’t know he was 78 instead 68, and wouldn’t write to a “fucking Prot bastard preacher” for advice or consolation if he could help it.
Sigh… family’s family.
I’m dying to find out step three of the nefarious “promiscuous sex HIV/AIDS gays'” plan, and what they hope to gain.
Step 3: Profit!
Yosef, I can only imagine the tortured freak-out Swankfan would suffer if he suspected the PSHA gays were raiding his underwear drawer.
“I’m appalled and disturbed…yet strangely aroused!!”
Leave that poor lamp alone!
Is Kaye Grogan a life-long 68-year-old? If so, I think we know who might be writing to the Pastor.
Wait, why is it Congress’ fault that we’re unprepared for more attacks? I thought our president was ushered into office on the wet dreams of all those soccer moms who thought he’d personally keep us safe?
I always thought New Iraq was in the southwest somewhere.
you know, somewhere between Texas and Utah.
Wow, I’m a member of a freakin’ cult! Which, admittedly, doesn’t jibe with me being an atheist… unless… oh, I get it; I’m supposed to worship those! And I know they exist, too! OK, Swankie’s kinda got me there.
I gotta get one of those gay IRS agent jobs so I can spend time persecuting Fundie churches, revoking their tax-exempt status, AND taking away their free-speech rights. It will be… SO… beautiful!
Does it ever bother him at all that reality steps in now and again and smacks him upside the head?
In this case, the fact that federal employees have no real protection against discrimination on the basis of homosexuality.
Does it ever bother him at all that reality steps in now and again and smacks him upside the head?
Swanky just ignores it, he’s completely transcended reality. He doesen’t just bend the spoon, he is the spoon.