Confederate Yankee: “YER BLACK HELICOPTERS AIN’T A-GITTIN’ ME, OBAMEE!”
I can’t decide what part of this post-election period I enjoy more: the crazed ideological purges or the descent into survivalist paranoia. Heck, why do I have to choose?
Good News: Obama’s Election Spurs New Appreciation For Constitution
[…]
Barack Obama is a gun-banner at heart, and there is every reason for Americans to doubt his campaign’s more moderate rhetoric when compared to his actual record.
Buy guns, America. It’s good for the economy, good for the development of our nation’s moral character, and our last bulwark against tyranny.
While you’re at it, consider hitting the Paypal link in the sidebar to the right as a belated blogoversary present. What you think that SLR 106FR is going to buy itself?
So after begging his readers into buying him a brand-spankin’ new grill in the aftermath of Hurricane Humberto last year, Confederate Yankee is now using the impeding tyranny of the Obama administration to beg his readers to send him cash so he can buy more guns. Talk about self reliance!
Part of me thinks Confederate Yankee is just a very clever liberal guy who stokes conservatives’ fear and paranoia to get free stuff. If that is the case, then he’s twenty gajillion times smarter than I’ll ever be.
While you’re at it, consider hitting the Paypal link in the sidebar to the right as a belated blogoversary present. What you think that SLR 106FR is going to buy itself?
How much of Galt’s Gulch will be funded by PayPal remittances?
A liberal in disguise would better at this thinkin’ stuff than Cornfed…
I believe he deserves a reward because of this prediction:
That’s some quality forecasting.
What you think that SLR 106FR is going to buy itself?
We get message!
What you say!
Somebody set up us the Obama!
What you think that SLR 106FR is going to buy itself?(sic, very sic)
What, he can’t afford it on his good big boodle of spondulix from workin’ at Wal-Mart?
Bwahahahaha! You’re a little late to the “caring about the constitution party”. After all, it’s “not a suicide pact” and “just a piece of paper”.
If your opinion on the constitution changes depending who is in power, you don’t believe in constitutional government. If you don’t believe in constitutional government, you’re anti-American.
When’s his radio show telling listeners how to properly stock a hideout shelter and advertising colloidal silver to cure all ailments?
I’m surprised he didn’t just go straight to demanding the Cadillac.
If only these idiots could understand that there’s more than two amendments, and they’re ALL worth defending, well, maybe I could take them a little more seriously.
But not likely…
mikey
Umm, I’m no gun-nut, so maybe someone might want to check this out. Teh SLR106FR is an AK-47 variant – i.e. it’s a Soviet design. Additionally, it’s made by Arsenal Inc. – a Bulgarian company.
we iz in yr malls bein mallninjaz
If only these idiots could understand that there’s more than two amendments…
The only reason they acknowledge two of them is that the only one they give a shit about is called the second – so there must be a first one somewhere.
Teh SLR106FR is an AK-47 variant – i.e. it’s a Soviet design.
ARRR grumph groumph well you know those ex-SovBloc guys really know how to make a gun so it’s okay, milspec milspec blurp blurp SecDef MilOps yadda yadda
Funny thing about developing moral character: it’s not the terms you conventionally talk about buying Chinese-manufactured, Soviet-designed assault weapons with.
But, you know, I guess maybe the entire “socialist” attack line was because Obama is a Trotskyite revisionist.
What’s the other one that they’re aware of? It doesn’t seem to be the first amendment.
And you know what? If you don’t fucking own an assault rifle, don’t fucking whine about the vague possibility of someone banning them. You don’t know how to shoot ’em, you don’t give a shit about learning to or ever using it for anything, it’s just the form of conspicuous consumption most likely to murder your neighbors’ children.
That’s not a bad idea. It’s kind of like those “Christian heavy metal” dudes. Maybe we should all start putting out right-wing blogs and live off of PayPal.
Sure they are. Haven’t you heard them whining that making fun of them, or even asking their VP nominee questions takes away their rights to free speech?
See, they know it’s there, they just don’t actually UNDERSTAND it…
mikey
Cornfed Wanker is spending a lot of time at the pwnshop these days.
I clicked through becasue I couldn’t believe the headline actually was “Good News: Obama’s Election Spurs New Appreciation For Constitution.” I guess accidental self-awareness is better than no self-awareness…right?
In the interest of accuracy, Dafydd ab Fatboy should be holding a 5-foot sandwich, not a rifle.
That Is All.
He’s looking for Judeo-Christian allies in the coming race war, obviously. Sure, the guy who owns his local pawn shop may be Korean, but the Hebrews are a crafty folk.
Shouldn’t he be putting donations toward his blog? Why should his readers pay for his Schlitz can-shooting excursions and Red Dawn reenactment weekends? Is he going to beg for gift cards from his followers to re-gift
to his family this Xmas?
“The only reason they acknowledge two of them is that the only one they give a shit about is called the second – so there must be a first one somewhere.”
Correct. The first one, as we all know, defines “free speech” as not being allowed to make fun of or criticize wingers when they behave like spoiled, evil, little children.
Dafydd ab Fatboy should be holding a 5-foot sandwich, not a rifle
That’s “a 5-foot milspec tactical deployment multiingredient hand-held battle ration”, maggot! Now drop and give me fifty!
I think someone should create a chatbot that gets its seed text from certain right-wing blogs. The talking points are uniform and the phrases are preset. Better, the prose is really choppy, so the usual “bot doesn’t talk like a human’ piece is easier to get around.
Then you set one up so it makes a post a day and add a paypal link. Better: make another bot or two to post comments on threads. That’ll seed your community for the chumps.
For those of you looking for some lulz, Michelle Malkin has set up a page where folks can send a thank-you note to Sarah Palin.
Here’s a choice excerpt from a Palin supporter:
My special gift is to recognize intelligence. I have worked with gifted children and with their advocates for most of my life. I have authored four books. I am quite certain that you are a highly intelligent woman who is also gifted. The definition of gifted is when you have a high I.Q. PLUS a facility with abstract concept and seeing patterns and approaching problems with creativity. You have my support. I’d bet money that your I.Q. test would trump “theirs” any day. You ought to challenge them!
I guess “I can see Alaska from my house” and “Africa is a country” are perfect demonstrations of Palin’s “facility with abstract concept.” Palin’s thinking is so abstract, she’s like a regular Wasilla Kandinsky.
So get in on the laugh riot and tell Sarah how much you appreciate her! It looks like a few Obama supporters are already over there pissing in the corn flakes.
Remember when CY was confident McCain would win?
Good times.
Palin’s thinking is so abstract, she’s like a regular Wasilla Kandinsky.
oooooh, I like that. 🙂
Wasilla Kandinsky.
Awe. Some.
the crazed ideological purges or the descent into survivalist paranoia.
Two great flavours that go together well.
Ahh, a Bumblin’ Bob thread. Before The Truth shows up to stick up for his best bud in the whole wide world (like he always does on Wankee threads) and the convo diverges down that path…
BAHAHAHAHAHA, nice predictin’, Bob! Yep, you knew it right down in your gut that McMentum would rule the day, cuz homina homina Ayers! homina Wright! homina boogity boogity boo! Awesome call, there. And I dig the oh-so-expected response to his boy’s complete failure…pseudo-“graciousness” in defeat cuz you liberals dun got mad back in twenty-oh-four!
Right before begging people for money so he can buy hisself a gun.
A performance art piece, indeed, this “Bob Owens.”
Yo yo yo wazzup its all Confeezy Yankeezy all up in yo greeeeeeeyull if ya feelz me be sendin da bens up in my bizzarnyard so i can be hot poppin mah guns if ya know what im sayyyunnnn all yeaaaah
We all know that the Constitution is just a framework for the Second Amendment; the other stuff is all optional.
Doesn’t he work at a gun shop?
Can’t he just steal one?
With apologies to Avenue Q…
SADLYNAUT NATION:
Right now you are down and out and feeling really crappy
TIDOS YANKEE:
I’ll say.
SADLYNAUT NATION:
And when I see how sad you are
It sort of makes me…
Happy!
TIDOS YANKEE:
Happy?!
SADLYNAUT NATION:
Sorry, Yankee, human nature-
Nothing I can do!
It’s…
Schadenfreude!
Making me feel glad that I’m not you.
TIDOS YANKEE:
Well that’s not very nice, Nation!
SADLYNAUT NATION:
I didn’t say it was nice! But everybody does it!
D’ja ever clap when a waitress falls and drops a tray of glasses?
TIDOS YANKEE:
Yeah…
SADLYNAUT NATION:
And ain’t it fun to watch figure skaters falling on their asses?
TIDOS YANKEE:
Sure!
SADLYNAUT NATION:
And don’tcha feel all warm and cozy,
Watching people out in the rain!
TIDOS YANKEE:
You bet!
SADLYNAUT NATION:
That’s…
SADLYNAUT NATION AND TIDOS YANKEE:
Schadenfreude!
SADLYNAUT NATION:
People taking pleasure in your pain!
TIDOS YANKEE:
Oh, Schadenfreude, huh?
What’s that, some kinda Nazi word?
SADLYNAUT NATION:
Yup! It’s German for “happiness at the misfortune of others!”
TIDOS YANKEE:
“Happiness at the misfortune of others.” That is German!
SADLYNAUT NATION AND TIDOS YANKEE:
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
TIDOS YANKEE:
Schadenfreude!
Making the world a better place…
Making the world a better place…
Making the world a better place…
To be!
SADLYNAUT NATION AND TIDOS YANKEE:
S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!
With apologies to Avenue Q…
Is that any good? It seems like the sort of thing that would piss me off if it wasn’t terrific.
“Palin’s thinking is so abstract, she’s like a regular Wasilla Kandinsky.”
Win.
The race wars have already started. Kenyan Special Forces troops have invaded Montana and are hunting down Heartland Patriots in a brutal, bloodthirsty fashion. They have somehow developed the ability (witchcraft??) to assemble the largest flocks of rabid pelicans that the world has ever scene and they are using them as their zombie slaves to hunt down Whitey.
You may think “Hey, what do I care/ Montana is miles from here”, but eventually, when they’ve finished slaughtering the pale folk of my state, they’ll get hungry enough to come looking for YOUR white meat! WAKE UP AMERICA, Maoist Black Panthers are plotting the overthrow of the USA of America and the world, so says their leader, Ernst Stavro Blofeld , head of the Maoist Black Panthers of Amerikkka.
they are using them as their zombie slaves to hunt down Whitey.
I like the white meat.
“Is that any good? It seems like the sort of thing that would piss me off if it wasn’t terrific.”
It was better than your average musical and had its funny moments, but I don’t think I’d call it terrific.
Not a bad way to spend a rainy afternoon in NYC after getting the half-price tickets, but there are some really good productions going right now and if you’re a theater geek there are better options.
Does Korir have the tape where Obama’s Granny admits this to Michelle? I will pay any and all amounts necessary to broadcast this on American channel Fox News.
I have mixed feelings about the right-wing purges. Let’s not forget who is really in charge of the GOP, the rich. They took one look at Sarah and said no, no way, no how. The GOP only exists to serve their interests, not the interests of racist crackers like Confederate Yankee or the theocratic dreams of Sarah Palin. The people that we laugh at here at dupes, they are nothing more than a means to an end.
If the Southern Strategy stops working they will switch to something that does and jettison the likes of Sarah and Bob in the time it takes to check their portfolio.
Good News: Obama’s Election Spurs New Appreciation For Constitution
Some of us never stopped appreciating it, you dick.
What you think that SLR 106FR is going to buy itself?
Get a job, leech. Or, if you got a job and can’t afford your penis replacement, how about not living above your means. Hey, speaking of which, did that Goldstein jagoff ever get a job or is he still begging liberals to help him pay for his house?
“I want my money today! It’s my money. I want it right now!” yelled one former campaign worker.
http://www.wthr.com/global/story.asp?s=9299280
Barry’s not sharin’. Shaaaaaame.
Brad X,
There’s so much to like. I know there’s probably a whole bunch of progressives here who are all like “Rahm Emmanuel? NOOOOOO!!!11!! See? Obama’s a sell-out!” Fine, because everyone knows that the Chief of Staff is the real president.
Me, I like it because it because of this quote from AP:
House GOP leader John Boehner of Ohio called Emanuel “an ironic choice for a president-elect who has promised to change Washington, make politics more civil, and govern from the center.”
Suck it GOP. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
Sure, the guy who owns his local pawn shop may be Korean, but the Hebrews are a crafty folk.
Ah, the Hahnstein Pawn Shop on La Cienega!
Good news: Obama’s election sends my stock portfolio into orbit.
Oh, wait…
http://www.belch.com/blog/2008/11/06/reason-142-to-homeschool-obama-teachers-wont-bully-kids-who-support-mccain/
Ha ha. Stupid kid got what she deserved, letting her Dad go to Iraq and all.
goober reminds me of a “friend” I had in grade school, who inexplicably contacted me out of the blue last night. He has not changed one bit…still a dim-bulb, angry, reactionary dittohead just like his father. He was like this at 13 years old, too.
You start to feel bad for people like this who never had a fighting chance, and then you actually have to tolerate them…then not so much.
Die in a fire, goober.
http://www.southparkstudios.com/episodes/207897/
Check it.
This is the only gun TIDOS Dickhead needs. Talk about a guy who seriously needs to get over the hump.
Cornfed Wanker is spending a lot of time at the pwnshop these days.
heh.
Simba,
Au contraire, I’m not angry one bit. It’s gonna be a fun four years.
Die in a fire, goober.
And you’re calling ME angry? What a sore winner, lol.
btw, whoever posted the theory that goober came here via Ace is spot-on, the more I think about it. A scared little pansy who lashes out at the world through a thin veil of malicious fratboy humor. Perfect fit for the playdoh-n-bacon crowd.
It was not lost on me as I tried to get this friend to go away last night that in a month I will be celebrating two years with my partner and he’s probably been through half-a-dozen girlfriends in that time.
Good news: Obama’s election sends my stock portfolio into orbit.
Oh, wait…
Yea, damn. He can’t fix problems BEFORE he’s President!
More proof that the US is a center-right nation – I just heard that, even if Missouri goes to Obama, my EV prediction of 375-163 might still be off.
Nebraska may be going partly blue. Fucking Omaha, where they passed a school segregation plan in 2006 has quite possibly voted Negro for President.
Best. Election. EVAR.
You’re angry because you have no control over your life, and the world scares you. I’m angry at you for being such an incredible dick.
There’s a difference, and the fact that you fail to recognize it just shows what a dimwitted moron you are.
My special gift is to recognize intelligence
Mine is discernment of the gifts of others, so no.
I’m so jealous of Wasilla Kandinsky I insist JK47 Bergeron must wear a mask, and ear buzzer, and weights from now on.
I like the white meat.
Shhhhh, dude, Obama’s been elected. We have to like them both equally now.
and–>an
Pre-Emptively Scapegoating teh balck guy for teh Drunken Fratboys failures
Sounds like the plot of “To Kill a Mockingbird”
You’re angry because you have no control over your life, and the world scares you. I’m angry at you for being such an incredible dick.
*pulls out Stradivarius, plays “My Heart Bleeds For You”*
My special gift is to recognize intelligence
I got a rock.
I wonder if this applies to his african-american and latino readers — oh, wait…never mind.
Paranoid wingnuts
Quivering madly with fear
Oops, he shot himself.
Hey goober , speaking of stock , you’re just about out of Cheetos , better yell up to mom and tell her to go “stock” up.
I’m angry at you for being such an incredible dick.
He’s wrong, Goobs. You’re not an incredible dick. In fact, you’re not even adequate as a dick.
YOu might want to think about some Enzyte, or Vasomine. I’d suggest Viagra, but I’m not sure welfare pays for that.
I don’t know about anyone else, but after making fun of the wingers at Dan Riehl’s site yesterday, I don’t even really care about making fun of irrelevant online wingers any more. I’m much more interested in watching the GOP wind up looking like the last scene of Reservoir Dogs.
I wonder if it really chafes their asses that the very finest mass produced assault rifle on Earth… is French.
That’s not a bad idea. It’s kind of like those “Christian heavy metal” dudes. Maybe we should all start putting out right-wing blogs and live off of PayPal.
Looks like Joe the scab tax-evading Plumbe is all over that business model.
Sarcastro, true to your nym, you’re kidding right?
Because, dude, that’s a Bullpup design.
Have you ever had to use one? Crap. Capital C Crap.
mikey
Jesus Haploid Christ, why won’t Joe The Plumber go away? Almost from the moment his name was mentioned by McCain in the last debate, this goomer was exposed as little more than a wingnut fraud and yet I’m still having to hear about him. Have some dignity, dude; at least the yutz that got rolled by that hooker at the GOP convention’s had the good sense not to start a friggin’ website over his 13 minutes of fame.
The finest Assault Rifle in the world wouldn’t be ANYTHING chambered in 5.56. My vote would go to the Barrett M468 in 6.8 Rem SPC.
Although, that said, I’m going to bitterly cling to my G3 in .308…
mikey
Palin’s thinking is so abstract, she’s like a regular Wasilla Kandinsky.
[Groan.]
[Applause.]
Sadly, my mother in law sincerely believes that Palin is, and I quote, “smart as a whip.” As in genuinely intelligent, not having the same IQ as a coiled piece of leather.
She also believe Nixon was a great president, just misunderstood. Finally, a few years into Gee Dumbya’s reign, I did concede to her that if Nixon ran against Dumbya in ’04, I’d vote for him.
The mother in law is a very nice and generous person, but damn. I never ever talk politics in her house if it can possibly be avoided.
The only important characteristic in assault rifles that I look for is that they are not pointing at me. That said, I’ve heard nice things about Fabrique Nationale.
Booger-
Scoreboard.
Now go back to AOSHQ. The fart contests/Palin pity parties aren’t fun without you.
> he’s probably been through half-a-dozen girlfriends in that time.
Wingnuts have more than two hands?
But I gotta address this head on:
1) Obama isn’t president yet.
2) Bush is.
3) We also had huge gains on Election Day, when everyone with a clue knew Obama was going to win. Wha’ happened?
4) Obama isn’t president yet.
5) Anyone attributing stock movements to individual factors is lost at sea.
6) Obama isn’t president yet.
7) How do you explain the more than a handful’s worth of days with triple-digit drops lately?
8) Obama isn’t president yet.
Although, that said, I’m going to bitterly cling to my G3 in .308…
An I to my FAL FN.
I’m not taking anything that calls itself “booger” seriously.
Neverthless it should probably be reinforcing the walls of its survival pod with another layer of tinfoil to keep from being hypnotized by Obama’s neuromatomic language rather than posting here.
The mother in law is a very nice and generous person, but damn. I never ever talk politics in her house if it can possibly be avoided.
See, this is why I’ll probably be single for the rest of my life. I do not have the ability to hold my tongue when someone says something as demonstrably silly as “That Sarah Palin, she’s smart as a whip.” Mother-in-law or no, I would not be able to stop myself. Hell, my own mother said she admired Palin’s obvious rapport with her own children and I said “Momma, you don’t get extra points for doing what you’re supposed to do.” She thought that was kinda rude and she loves me.
GOP Lawyer Dispatched To Alaska To Retrieve Some Of Palin’s Clothes
What I wouldn’t give to see that.
Sarah Palin… whips… mmmm
Sorry, what was I saying?
> He added that he also planned to launch http://www.secureourdream.org
He’s got the smirk down.
Maybe “Joe” is just Cheney after some plastic surgery to evade justice.
Sarah Palin… whips… mmmm
Eeeew. Just… eeeeeeewwwww.
Noen, that LA Times article you linked to.
Couldn’t they find a scene of Republican staff members who were not using a paper-shredder?
GOP Lawyer Dispatched To Alaska To Retrieve Some Of Palin’s Clothes
This election is as satisfying to me as, uh, coming is, you know? As, ah, having sex with a woman and coming. And so can you believe how much I am in heaven? I am like, uh, getting the feeling of coming in an election, I’m getting the feeling of coming on TV, I’m getting the feeling of coming on the radio, when I post on a blog in front of 50,000 people, I get the same feeling, so I am coming day and night. I mean, it’s terrific. Right? So you know, I am in heaven.
Wingnuts have more than two hands?
He’s always having one-night stands with “The Stranger”.
I can just imagine that scene, all those designer clothes will come flying out of Palin’s front door before the lawyers even hit the steps. There must be a scene from some movie that fits but I’m too giddy right now to think.
GOP Lawyer Dispatched To Alaska To Retrieve Some Of Palin’s Clothes
Apparently, she spent way more than the 150 grand on clothes once reported, including 20 to 40 large on The First Dude. Ho-lee shit. Forty grand on a guy? Sweet Marinated Jesus, I don’t think I’ve owned $40,000 worth of clothes in my entire 33 years. And these were supposed to be “jes plain folk”? Yow.
Although, that said, I’m going to bitterly cling to my G3….
Dude, let it go.
They were just designed to be a bridge from OS9 to OSX. They came in some cool colors, but really. The ones running on Intel chips are pretty sweet.
President Obama.
(and a big ol’ FYWP to software that still thinks Obama is typo.)
I love Sadly, No! Have I said that before? There, as the song says “I’ve Said it Again”
I wish we were married and there were lots of little Sadly,No!s scurrying around the house. Watching them grow up would be very gratifying.
Oh, spurn me if you like, I’ll wait.
She even forced some of her staff to pay for some of her clothes using their credit cards. She stiffed them and now they are going to the GOP looking to be reimbursed. Gook luck suckers.
Look to the clothing budget, and Palin’s makeup tech for the source of Ashley Todd’s “bruises” and epidermal calligraphy. If you get my drift.
Don’t wanna be one of those irresponsible non-speculators. I can’t stand people like that.
They were just designed to be a bridge from OS9 to OSX.
Ah yes, the Arthur chipset…
This election is as satisfying to me as, uh, coming is, you know?
I dunno. I didn’t smoke after they called Ohio.
GOP Lawyer Dispatched To Alaska To Retrieve Some Of Palin’s Clothes
You know, I might just go by the thrift store – there’s a consignment store in one of the ritzy neighborhoods here that has some once-worn, rich-women kind of clothing in – and find something that looks like something Palin wore during the campaign.
Then I’ll fake up some sort of Certificate of Authenticity for it, claim it still has Wasilla Kandinsky’s actual sweat in it, go on eBay and sell it for a big hunk of change from some hard-up wingnut with way more money than sense.
Then donate the proceeds to the ACLU or AIDS research or Planned Parenthood.
What you think that SLR 106FR is going to buy itself?
What I think… What? That’s not even close to being a parsable sentence. It kind of reads like written by someone with French as their native tongue
She even forced some of her staff to pay for some of her clothes using their credit cards. She stiffed them and now they are going to the GOP looking to be reimbursed. Gook luck suckers.
I saw that. I know Caribou Barbie doesn’t have Moneybags McCain’s scratch, but still, I imagine a governor gets paid better and has better credit than a campaign worker. Fucking astounding, and what really kills me is the campaign workers apparently went “Sure, Mother Palin, put that incredibly expensive dress that does absolutely nothing a, say, $300 dress doesn’t do on my credit card. Anything you want!”
Now, I’ve joked about wingnuts being, at their very core, born bootlickers and worshippers of capital-p Power since I first read my Zinn, but to have it put on such garish display and for such a petty thing is, well…unsettling. Maybe they ought to do spine checks, I’m not sure I want such gutless people that close to The Powers That Be.
And these were supposed to be “jes plain folk”? Yow.
Actually, that rings kind of true. Some jes’ plain folk who lived down the street from my wife, back when she was my fiancee, inherited just over a million dollars from some rich uncle or somebody.
These were people to whom a million dollars sounded like an infinite amount of money, so they bought a boat, two new cars, etc. etc. – and blew through the million bucks and rolled up a fat lump of debt, all within seven months.
A lot of jes’ plain folk have no idea how to handle money; I betcha that Bible Spice didn’t get the best value she might have for the First Dude’s new duds.
> I saw that. I know Caribou Barbie doesn’t have Moneybags McCain’s scratch, but still, I imagine a governor gets paid better and has better credit than a campaign worker. Fucking astounding, and what really kills me is the campaign workers apparently went “Sure, Mother Palin, put that incredibly expensive dress that does absolutely nothing a, say, $300 dress doesn’t do on my credit card. Anything you want!”
The nutjob wingnut sheep were probably happy to do it to get points on their card.
Plus they would probably bronze their card statement when it came in the mail as a souvenir.
When asked about how much money he would take from the site, he said: “Yes, I would make money to some degree from this charity Web site, but not a whole lot because a majority of the portion collected through this Web site would go to help fellow Americans get a decent living.”
Or, hey, we might actually require employers to pay their workers a living wage so they wouldn’t have to rely on crumbs thrown from the table by a bunch of fat-assed Republican sociopaths.
Man, I know Obama did well with white working class Americans, but so many WWCAs are teh stoooooooopid. “Return to the bad old days of feudalism? Why, coitanly! Where’s my pitchfork and scratch plow?”
Barack Obama is a gun-banner at heart
When I think about gun-banners, the first one that comes to mind is the confederate flag.
Xecky,
A lot of jes’ plain folk have no idea how to handle money
Ya know, as a huge Elvis fan, that should’ve occurred to me. Still, it wasn’t that the Palins thought they were “jes plain folk” yet spent money like drunken debutants. It’s that they were painted “jes plain folk” by wingnuttia even after the shopping spree was discovered and the best the goobers could come up with was “Well, should the VP nominate shop at Wal-Mart then, huh huh?” and none of ’em apparently stopped and asked themselves if that was money well-spent. Maybe I just have an over-inflated opinion of my own grasp of logic and reason, but it troubles me deeply that there are people in this day-and-age who are that willing to be told what to do.
These were people to whom a million dollars sounded like an infinite amount of money, so they bought a boat, two new cars, etc. etc. – and blew through the million bucks and rolled up a fat lump of debt, all within seven months.
Sounds like you knew my first cousin and his new bride in their first year of marriage. Funny thing is, once they got that straightened out, they did a total 180, lifestyle-wise. She’s a nurse who goes from job-to-job, and he does the same thing as an electrician. Both of ’em work like hell for 3 months and fuck off the rest of the year. Always knew he was the smart one in the family.
Barack Obama is a gun-banner at heart
As a matter of curiosity, is there any basis in that? Which, of course, means I’m asking thus: has Obama proposed/voted for/supported your basic, light and above all mainstream gun regisration/regulation type things, which the gun-strokers always interpret as “liberals want to take my guns away, period” because they’re stupid?
For what it’s worth, one of the guys I get my herbal medication from is a gun guy and borderline gun stroker (he really, really likes his gun, but he knows how silly it is and only owns the one gun) was up until this election a single-issue voter, and that issue was “Damn liberals won’t take my guns away so I’m voting for the Bible-thumping, gay-bashing loons”.
He voted for Obama and vociforously opposed the McCain-Palin abomination. So, congrats, wingnuts, ya lost another.
Maybe I just have an over-inflated opinion of my own grasp of logic and reason, but it troubles me deeply that there are people in this day-and-age who are that willing to be told what to do.
I, for one, think you’re dead on. It’s very saddening indeed.
Fuck that shit. I think he should be going for a M79 40mm Grenade Launcher instead of an AK. Think about it. Say you and your family are at home minding your own business and all of a sudden a Japanese foreign exchange student knocks on you door looking for the costume party next door. You think a couple triple fire bursts are going to lay him out on your front lawn? Brother, ain’t even going to phase him. Grenade launcher, make the first round count.
Why does the discourse of your average gun nut inevitably devolve into alphanumeric nonsense? They’re worse than music gearheads. And those guys bore the living shit out of me.
Actually, the Palin spend-a-thon makes me realize I’ve been merely low-to-medium-maintenance. Maybe I need to add a paypal button to my comments so I can get me a new grill.
Good news: Obama’s election sends my stock portfolio into orbit.
A Repub friend of mine said something similar to me a few days ago. About how I would be “shocked” if I thought anyone making more than $15k a year would benefit from Obama’s tax plans.
I told her that if she thinks I voted purely out of self interest, she is sorely mistaken. I hope the difference in psychology (voting for the NATION, not voting for my own bank account) is instructive, but I have my doubts.
I personally hope that the new leader of the Fatherland litters everyone of his public pronouncement with veiled and cryptic second amendment references. Just think of what an electoral college boon it would be for our side if all the yokels corral themselves up in Idaho somewhere! (in “cold, dead hand” and “freedom isn’t free” zones) And of course, leave Ms. Malkin and Ms. Jean Lopez stateside to continue to throw molotov cocktails at the ‘establishment’ wing of their party. I haven’t enjoyed a meltdown like this since the Reichstag fire in 1933!
Yeah, making your campaign staff buy your high-priced duds on their personal cards because why, your own card no longer works? Is that it Sarah? Though I do recall you telling the press that these are hard times and you and the First Dude were struggling to make ends meet.
Classy, classy, classy.
Just think of what an electoral college boon it would be for our side if all the yokels corral themselves up in Idaho somewhere! (in “cold, dead hand” and “freedom isn’t free” zones)
I was thinking more an island somewhere, like in “Brave New World”.
Just ship all the wingnuts off there and let them play their free-market games where they’re the only ones who have to suffer.
By now the “Lord of the Flies” comparison is becoming hackneyed.
Yeah, I like how Joe the Plumber decides and is openly encouraged by the GOP in the delusion that being a campaign prop entitles him to massive cash prizes, and yet it’s the (always unverifiable) Scary Reparations-Wanting Negroes we should be ashamed of.
You think if Joe Biden spent $300,000 on dresses the media would have let it go?
Here’s a tip. REAL gun guys don’t talk much about guns. We talk about bullets. Loads. Ballistic performance. Real gun guys talking about guns would be like real airplane guys talking about airports.
Ultimately, the “launching pad” isn’t as interesting as the rocket…
mikey
Wasilla Kandinsky
Arty snark comment of the year. Brilliant.
You think if Joe Biden spent $300,000 on dresses the media would have let it go?
Oh please, people would talk about it forever because he does NOT have the legs for it.
I was thinking more an island somewhere, like in “Brave New World”.
Just ship all the wingnuts off there and let them play their free-market games where they’re the only ones who have to suffer.
I prefer building a huge arcology somewhere, in which they could live their Randian fantasy. Just think of the massive jobs program that could be put into place for the construction. I could totally picture a cyborg Dick Cheney hunting lesser wingnuts through the maze-like corridors of this Brave New Randistan.
Even better, how about a “generational starship”? Just remember to leave phone sanitizers off of the passenger manifest.
What you think that SLR 106FR is going to buy itself?
I’ll donate for a bullet, TIDOS, as long as it’s put to good use.
Technically, Fontane was more of a splicer than a cyborg.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
Underwater?
Dibs on the term “( R )-cology”.
I’m holding out for the Crazed Ideological Purges — and that could dovetail neatly with a new, proto-‘Survivor’ series: Watch as they plot, ally and cheat against each other!
Perle vs. Feith! Wolfowitz vs. Rummy!! Brooks vs. Kristol!! Goodling vs. Schlozmann!! Cox vs. Greenspan!! Podhoretz vs. Ledeen!! And everybody against Chalabi!
I’d pay money to see that.
Even better, how about a “generational starship”?
Ben Elton wrote a similar sort of story about how the Randian superfolk completely fuck up the Earth and then abandon it in big spaceships. Extremely dark comedy entitled Stark, appropriately enough.
I’d pay money to see that.
As would I. We could advertise it as the Konservative Kumite.
They keep running local nightly news promotions here at every commercial break that go “Sales of guns shooting up around the country! Find out why at 11!” with a gun store owner going “If you want one of these, get it now.”
Gosh, why might paranoid cracker-ass crackers be buying guns?! I’m at a fucking loss.
Buy guns, America. It’s good for the economy, good for the development of our nation’s moral character, and our last bulwark against tyranny.
It’s nice to see the wingnuts are all about being against tyranny now.
Of course, the government has M1 tanks and cruise missiles. Confederate Yankee’s little pissant SLR 106FR isn’t going to scare them much.
This election is as satisfying to me as, uh, coming is, you know?
If RB moved to California to run for Govenor, I would move to California to vote for him.
Ironic really, because if all he wants is an AK-style rifle, he could get a Saiga in .223 for about a third of the cost of the SLR-106.
Just saying.
Why does the discourse of your average gun nut inevitably devolve into alphanumeric nonsense?
Idiot savant syndrome. “246! One for bad two for good!”
I prefer building a huge arcology somewhere, in which they could live their Randian fantasy.
The Biosphere’s available. Maybe we can restore it to its truly closed environment and watch them choke to death on their own carbon emissions.