This is Awesome
Hey, remember MegaShift, that WorldNetDaily book about Christians coming back from the dead?
Well, it’s apparently such a hit that WND has given its author, Jim Rutz, a regular column! Let’s take a look:
Let’s start off with the biggest unknown fact of our time: The world is rapidly becoming all-Christian.
That’s not theology or wishful thinking, just statistics.
Hmm, that’s funny- the statistics I’ve read say:
-“The growth rate of Christianity, according to the U.S. Center for World Mission, is very close to the growth rate of the world’s population. The percentage of Christians in the world has remained almost constant for decades.”
-“The growth rate of Islam, according to the U.S. Center for World Mission, at 2.9% is higher than the 2.6% growth rate of the world’s population. Thus, the percentage of Muslims in the world is growing on the order of 0.6% per year.”
So it looks like Jim’s assertion that “the world is rapidly becoming all-Christian” gets a big ol’ “Sadly, No!” But let’s keep reading the column anyway:
And the numbers are shouting at me.
Are you sure that’s not the voices in your head?
A billion people are going to switch their loyalties to Jesus in the next 11 or 12 years and that may be just the beginning.
And now, an exceprt from Jim Rutz’ new Christianity Infomercial:
RUTZ: Other religions say they can offer you salvation, but mostly they give you headaches. I mean, who really wants to pay for multiple wives?
[Cut to Islamic man, surrounded by his five wives, holding his head in despair after opening his phone bill.
ISLAMIC MAN: “Allah Akbar,” my ass!]
RUTZ: Or give up pork?
[Cut to Jewish family sitting at Passover dinner:
JEWISH FATHER: The goyim get Easter ham, and we’re stuck with this matzah? Oy vay!]
RUTZ: And who in world understands how the “Dharma” works?
[Cut to Buddhist monk shrugging his shoulders]
RUTZ: The truth is, only Christianity can give you both spiritual guidance AND moral clarity! But don’t take it from us- let’s hear what a recent convert says.
RECENT CONVERT: I used to think I was happy worshiping ‘Religion X,’ but that’s before I discovered Jesus-Brand Salvation! Once I got my FREE complimentary wine’n’wafer at my first service, I knew that Jesus-Brand was the ONLY religion for me!
RUTZ: Convert now, and we’ll absolve you of THREE complimentary sins… ABSOLUTELY FREE!
And now, back to Jim’s column:
As you might guess, this megashift could play hob with the citadels of Islam, Buddhism and Hinduism. They might even hit a crashpoint.
And we all know how much fun it is when religions clash.
It could also virtually wipe out secular humanism, the clueless corps of New-Agers, and the doomed hordes of post-modernists now wandering aimlessly about the wasteland of non-referential abstraction.
Or as the Beach Boys might sing:
“I’m gettin’ bugged drivin’ up and down the Wasteland Street,
I gotta find a new place with referential abstraction.”
Or something like that. At any rate, it’s clear that neither Jim nor I will ever release a platinum single.
How do I reach such far-out conclusions?
I’m gonna say drugs.
Am I as fringy as I sound?
Sure looks like it.
Let’s consult the hard numbers. I’ll start with the 20th century:
-In 1900, there were 2 million evangelical or charismatic Christians in Africa. By 2000, there were 200 million.
-In Latin America during that period, the born-again population zoomed from 1 million to 170 million.
-And in China, just since 1950, Christianity has exploded from fewer than a million to almost 120 million.
Do you detect a trend here? If so, congratulations, you’re ahead of the New York Times, CNN and the massed legions of academe.
I have too much of a headache to research these numbers, but let’s just note that Christianity’s growth has essentially levelled off as a percentage of world population. I refer you again to ReligiousTolerance.org:
About 33% of the world’s population regard themselves as Christian. This percentage has been stable for decades. (The second most popular religion is Islam at about 20%. It is growing. If its present growth rate continues, it will to become the dominant religion of the world during in a few decades.)
OK, Jim, I’m geting bored- let’s cut to the chase:
So what’s going on? How could such a hurricane of change escape notice? What exactly is in back of all this?
Oh, sorry ? I’m running out of room. I guess it will have to wait until next week.
God, I have to read another one of these things?!
But I promise you’ll find the events behind my numbers far more astonishing than the numbers themselves. In fact, you’ll quickly agree that this movement is going to be much bigger than the Reformation. Even bigger than Wal-Mart.
My view of Jim’s columns: “Always Low Expectations, Always.”
OK, stop grumbling, I’ll give you a hint: My research for my new book, “Megashift,” has found 52 countries where God has brought people back from the dead, mostly in the last 20 years.
And these are not near-death experiences, where someone on an operating-room table passes out and sees himself going down a long tunnel. These are stone-dead corpses.
Also, for what it’s worth, I have zero interest in flying saucers, crop circles, the Bermuda Triangle, the anti-Christ, or the sexual preference of Spongebob Squarepants.
Yeah, only Grade-A lunatics are obsessed with those things! Serious minds write about people being raised from the dead!
But I am seriously interested in a megashift so life-changing that it dwarfs anything ever seen on this warm green planet. And I think you’ll get serious right along with me.
Indeed:
pretty funny yo…. not Rutz, he is a loon.
No more crack for Jim.
“I’m gettin’ bugged drivin’ up and down the Wasteland Street,
I gotta find a new place with referential abstraction.”
LOL.
Let’s see here: WND writer – check. Playing fast and loose with statistics – check. Making patently outrageous claims, namely that the Evangelical movement will crush all other faiths in 12 years (including the ubiquitous secular humanism) – check. Noticable anti-intellectualism – check. Nonsensical metaphors – check. Fervent denial of own lunacy – check. Brad, I think you may have found a keeper here. Well done.
Strange blog, I’ll say that much.
Don’t miss this post; you have to see it at least once in your life:
whowilldietoday.blogspot.com
Seriously, can anyone really imagine a world run by whack-job born again Christians?
They’re barking mad.
…this movement is going to be much bigger than the Reformation.
I was so hoping we could just skip straight past this part to get to the next Enlightenment.
Of course all of this is neither here nor there because America is the only country that matters and everybody knows that Christians are a persecuted minority there.
-In Latin America during that period, the born-again population zoomed from 1 million to 170 million.
I’m not about to vouch for his specific numbers, but that trend is in fact happening.
But — do you know what those 169 million people were before they were bornagin?
CATHOLICS!
As far as Christians compared to everyone else, that’s a wash.
Do you detect a trend here? If so, congratulations, you’re ahead of the New York Times, CNN and the massed legions of academe.
This is what freaks me out. Ah! Academe and the entire mass media will not cover this, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true!!!!
Just because I’m pulling it out of my ass doesn’t mean it’s not really happening!
This guy is seriously nutty. He makes people like Osama look like Ramadan-and-Eid-Muslims.
So God is going to raise enough Christians from the dead that we’ll outnumber the Muslims??? (confusion sets in).
So God is going to raise enough Christians from the dead that we’ll outnumber the Muslims??? (confusion sets in).
That seems to be the jist of it, yeah.
“Oh, sorry ? I’m running out of room. I guess it will have to wait until next week.”
Yup, this whore for Christ is going fishing. Can you believe how lamely he’s trying to stretch this shit out?
“OK, stop grumbling, I’ll give you a hint: My research for my new book, “Megashift,” has found 52 countries where God has brought people back from the dead, mostly in the last 20 years.
And these are not near-death experiences, where someone on an operating-room table passes out and sees himself going down a long tunnel. These are stone-dead corpses.”
Uh, Jim,
I think yer bad moon’s a-risin’. Maybe what you saw in those 52 countries is the foreign language dubbed George Romero’s “Night of the Living Dead” film!
Honest Jim, it’s just a movie…really; put away the bad stuff; let yer head clear.
P.S. Jim, I don’t think George Romero is God…at least not yours. Why don’t you check with Dubya. I understand he’s on a one to one with god.
No need to raise them from the dead. Just send ’em to the polls as is, the way Karl Rove did.
Yeah, screw Bigfoot, and I don’t mean that in a Neal Horseplay way. Spontaneous Human Resurrection is where it’s at, baby! Legions of the born-again undead will be shambling up to front doors all over America (tomorrow, the world!), handing out tracts and inviting people to be just like them.
I can see where the ability to come back to life would be helpful in overtaking the Muslims. Sure, they’re converting more, but the Christians, by not dying, are putting a stop to attrition-by-death. Darn clever, Our God!
In fact, you’ll quickly agree that this movement is going to be much bigger than the Reformation.
Ah yes, the Reformation. Lovely time, that. And this dickhead is looking for a repeat.
All hail our glorious undead future overlords!
I hate to be the one to bring impertinent questions to the party, but if the world’s population is headed ineffably toward Christianity, what are the wingnuts so worried about? Isn’t that what they want? Doesn’t that mean that the inquisition and persecution of Christians is going to end soon and the growing billions of born again will be able to put the Bible back on the throne?
Yes- but its not happening fast enough, dammit!
Moe: This fryer can deepfry a buffalo in 6 seconds!
Homer: Owww… but I want it Now.
hey, i just came back from the “who will die today? site referenced above and I have very bad news for Jim Rutz and Bill Frist: >> The Ninth of the Ten Commandments is “You shall not lie.” Telling just one lie, according to God’s standards, makes you a “liar.” In Revelation 21:8, God says, “…all liars, shall have their part in the lake of fire…”
BTW, Brad, the reason your math didn’t add up like Jim’s: You forgot to factor in that all the zombies will be Christians.
“crashpoint”
Shades of Doug Giles…
C?lisse de tabarnac’!
This didn’t work the first time, so here goes (again):
“crashpoint”
Paging Doug Giles!
Thayli, these guys don’t count Catholics as Christians. That’s probably how Jim Nutz gets his numbers, because evangelical Christianity is in fact growing as a percentage of the total Christian population. You’re not a Christian unless you’re their kind of Christian.
Seriously, can anyone really imagine a world run by whack-job born again Christians?
Don’t need to.
Yay! All Christians are stupid! Let’s put together a club and celebrate! Let’s promote tolerance, um, except of evangelical Christians. After all, we’re so enlightened, we don’t really need God, because we’re so much smarter than Him! And we’re also a LOT more moral than all those self-righteous “holier than thou’s” (just ignore all our profanity and arrogance and insults).
Hello, Anonymous. Please stop, you’re wearing me out. My friend and yours Ad Hominem is looking a little overworked, too.
Anon:
While it’s possible to be agnostic on the general question of whether “a” God exists, the the existence of the Christian “God,” especially as defined by Christianists, is a logical impossiblity. Also, according to the characteristics ascribed by most evangelicals I know, to “God,” he apparently has an IQ of about 110, or less. Therefore, I agree with you, there are indeed some of us who are smarter than he is, and who are emotionally stable, so, yes, we don’t need him.
This is about money and marketing. It’s bullshit and despicable that so-called Christians peddle this stuff….they know there are idiots out there who will buy it, and yet they still truly consider themselves ‘holy’ and sanctimonious while doing it.
They’re bastardized evango-bots, rotting out their sphere of the Internet and the minds and psyches of the weak.
* A (really steamed) Christian.
Believer or non believer, Christian or any other, the (marketing 😉 success story of Christianity is beyond comparison. While in the early days of Christianity it was the brilliant step of having a known believe (Judaism) altered and embracing other given believe on their way, they moved to force this believe on others in their dark days, and now – mission is still active, but where to start? In non-Christian countries or in Christian countries where more and more people decide to live without a fixed system and leave their Christian churches?
Am I afraid of a Christian world? Yes, if only talking statistics. I have a lot of people living their lives based on their believes, but for myself I have a “noli me tangere”… give me my space and don’t tell me in what to believe. BTW – raising people from the dead, no, no, no way.
Regards – Ursula
Christian Terms Look Up – http://www.babylon.com/define/25/Introduction-to-Christianity.html