Hooters Hewitt is a pathetic hack, and always has been. If the GOP told him to go down on an electric eel, he’d do it. He isn’t worth the shit in my body.

Which means the country will be well led on the war for at least another four crucial years.

The war in Iraq for another 4 years? Or another 4 years of the Eternal War Against Islamosexualism?

Watchin’ the wheels come off and off
Off and off, off and off
Watchin’t eh wheels come off and off
Hy-ster-i-cal!

Sarah Palin, Republican Vice-Presidential Nominee, Plugs Romney, Paul — But Not McCain — In MTV Interview

In this interview, Palin calls controversial Republican presidential hopeful Ron Paul “cool.” “He’s a good guy,” she added. “He’s so independent. He’s independent of the party machine. I’m like, ‘Right on, so am I.’ ”

Can we please have a reprise of Spew Spewitt’s enconia to Harriet Miers? He was, after all, a supplier of arslikhan right to the sad (and hilarious) end.

Hanx.

baddabing1 wrote:
What an INCREDIBLY SEXIST EDITORIAL. This woman has WAY more executive experience than OBAMA DOES–Obama has NONE! And for that matter, NEITHER DOES BIDEN! She’s Commander in Chief of the Alaska National Guard, and her state has a long border with a foreign country–
==========================================
By long border with a foreign country, do you mean Canada, or the Pacific Ocean, baffoon?
~
8/29/2008 9:01:22 PM
(at the WaPoo)

All the wingnuts are running around with their blast faxes (and sharp pairs of scissors…hanx MzNicky for that image), and promoting Palindrome’s executive leadership of the Alaska National Guard.

It is to laugh. We all knew they were lemmings, but now they are marching over the cliff and into the sea, just for our amusement.

Well, there is this: doing something incredibly stupid if not batshit insane is one way to get people talking about something other than how you totally got owned last night.

But if you end up just owning yourself when you do the incredibly stupid and/or batshit insane thing, is that really an improvement?

How soon before Ms Palin shoots someone in the face on a quail hunting expedition?

Apparently she hates polar bears because they get in the way of her hubby’s oil profits. I wonder how many she’s tried to shoot.

Well, to borrow a phrase, the fact is it depends on what your goals look like.

If you could force McCain/Palin to describe the world they hope their children will inhabit in 2030, it would be frightening to behold.

Of course, since you can’t even get Senator McCain to describe what he means when he uses the word “honor”, you’re not likely to get this information.

But it’s a nasty, tragic, dystopian world where wealthy people live in gated communities behind private security that regularly kills hungry scared people who venture too close, and they do so without consequences. In this world very wealthy people run multi national corporations that manufacture goods using slave labor in third world countries and use american military power to dominate an competing nation.

I don’t want to live in this world. Indeed, I will NOT live in this world….

mikey

Third, the Palin pick guarantees that the party will remain a conservative party long-term.

Was this in doubt? They ran all the moderate and liberal Republicans out on a rail thirty years ago. Wtf, son?

Can anyone explain to me how this is not, at minimum, the fourth American century?

Like I said in the last thread, these guys are just chomping into the shit sandwich with great gusto, and smiling while they tell us it’s delicious peanut butter.

Not to mention reason number seven. McCain, you see, is short. Typically short people don’t get very far in politics – so almost all of the other potentials were people who absolutely towered over Johnny-boy. What were we going to do? Make McCain wear platform shoes all the time? Dude was a POW for five and a half years, he can’t balance in platforms. He can’t even raise his hands over his head – so as soon as he loses balance, there’s no flailing for balance – it’s straight to face plant land. Kinda describes his oratorical style…

Where was I? Yeah Sarah Palin is shorter than McCain. Now there’s so quality problem solving there. You think you can compete with this tepy of resourcefulness? Well you can’t, you can’t do it my friends.

It’s too bad it’s a written column, because I would love to see him try to say “Commander-in-Chief of the Alaska National Guard” without giggling or at least stifling a chortle.

Also, this is only the Second American Century because the pre-Imperialist* ones don’t count.

*You know, just colonialist.

and her state has a long border with a foreign country–

She’s apparently big on border security.

Cuz if it isn’t drunken Canucklevanians busting up Skagway’s taverns it’s Rooskies crossing the Bering Strait on spruce rafts.

she has “crazy eyes”.

just sayin’

Ace responds to your snark:

“Our Very Smart Lefty Friends Don’t Seem to Understand Irony”

Complete with a Merriam-Webster definition.

http://ace.mu.nu/archives/271934.php

I mis-read Hewitt’s headline as Victory and Energy for the Second American Century: Cheering the Palin Prick. Am I a bad person?

Also, Mikey: your Republican dystopia sounds an awful lot like O Zone by Paul Theroux. An interesting novel, although not one of my faves. Features a bunch of rich folks venturing out of their sanitised, gated existence into the wild, getting lost, and meeting icky dirt and godawful poor people.

Hey, I never realised that irony consisted of saying lots of dumb things and then pretending to be clever. Is it as easy as that?

Sadly, no!

Also from Ace;

“PS: This choice really seems to be wigging them the f**k out.”

This HehIndeed goes to 11.

I wonder if the fReichtards realize they’re talking about Palin as though she’ll be the next president.

Doesn’t anyone think McCain will last another four years?

Any of you guys cheering on Gustav like Michael the Michigan Manatee?
http://hotair.com/archives/2008/08/29/michael-moore-this-hurricane-is-proof-that-there-is-a-god-in-heaven/

Booger, go tell ace to look up “whistling past the graveyard”.

And apropos of Palin, I too spent a confused while thinking they meant Michael Palin, who’s one of my idols.

Because how could conservatives argue with that nomination? He’s got boggins of foreign experience, with all his travel docos; he’s been fightin’ man as a Knight of King Arthur; he knows how to cut down trees while singing; he’s even been a torturer (in Brazil). Plus he’s worked with Jesus, or at least Brian.

And he’s universally known as “the nice Python”. What better candidate for VP? Indeed, why stop at VP: how about Prez? Or how about Supreme God-Emperor?

I actually think it’s quite likely that McCain will last another four years. After all, his mother is still living (and seems to be sharper than him) and longevity does run in families.

That doesn’t make his selection of Palin any less irresponsible.

I heard a rumor that Palin was the last-choice pick, that Romney, Jindal, and Pawlenty had all turned it down, which would explain a lot. Then again, WaPo talked with someone in the Romney camp that said both Romney and Pawlenty are pissed for having been strung along, working all the while for POW Johnny’s campaign.

Who knows? And really, who cares? The woman isn’t qualified and it’s an irresponsible choice.

Hey, am I the only one snickering over all those headlines reading, “McCain taps Alaska governor for Vice-President”?

I mean, ew.

The woman isn’t qualified and it’s an irresponsible choice.

We are talking about the rethuglican ticket, so the only surprise here is the woman part.

Booger, go tell ace to look up “whistling past the graveyard”.

Done. It’s way down the thread so I don’t know if he’ll see it.

So, the comment “this has to be parody” was pretty much accurate then?

Oh wait, he’s not talking about us.

Well anyway, his “correction” was wrong too, so there’s a certain … incongruity there.

“The woman isn’t qualified and it’s an irresponsible choice”….

…said the Obama supporter.

*snicker*

Today I heard Palin say that she fought the good old boy machine.
Seems to me the way she fought it was to join it.

Hooty is right (did I just say that?) the conservatives will love her because she is a cold heartless SOB, And she shoots stuff and ‘Alaska is littered with the bodies of those that got in her way’ and other maverickylicious things.

And oh, she is CIC of the Alaskan National Guard which is almost as good as POW. Just as good though will be the ‘baby with downs syndrome’ card ‘ ,which I am already sick of hearing.

And she eats moose.
Friggin moose.
Well YE HAW.
Who knows what will be served at the next BBQ in Scottsdale.

“Just as good though will be the ‘baby with downs syndrome’ card ‘ ,which I am already sick of hearing.”

You’re only hearing it from your side, bkln.

JOHN MCCANE HAS SELECTED SARA PALING IN A DESPERT ATTEMPT TO PROTECT HIMSELF FROM THE ONRUSHING MENASE OF TEH FUCHING FERRETS. SARA PALING FREQUENTLY STRIDES OUT INTO THE ALASKEN SNOW AND RIPS OFF ALL HER CLOATHES AND RUNS SHREEKING IN SEARTCH OF A POLER BEAR. WHEN SHE FINDS ONE SHE STRANGELS IT WITH HER BARE HANDS AND RIPS ITS GUTS OUT AND WEARS THE BLOODY PELT BACK TO TOWN TO SHOW HER FERCENESS. SHE ALSO ONCE DID THIS TO ONE OF THE MEMBERS OF THE PTA AND FROM THEY DAY FORWARD EVERYONE IN TOWN SOILED THEMSELVES WHEN THEY SAW HER COMING. SHE ALSO USED TO HAVE SIX CHILDREN BUT ATE ONE OF THEM APPROXIMETLY FOUR YEARS AGO. A POLER BEAR IS NO MATCH FOR TEH FUCHING FERRETS SO IT WILL BE ABOUT AN EVEN CONTEST WITH PALING. THAT IS THE BEST JOHN MCCANE CAN HOPE FOR TO PROTECT HIMSELF FROM HIS DATE WITH FACE EATING DESTINEY. JOE BIDAN SHOULD BRING A BURP GUN OR MAYBE AN RPG IN CASE HE SEES THAT TELLTAIL EYE TWITCH DURING THERE DEBATE.

You’re only hearing it from your side, bkln.

Sadly, no.

Booger said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:58

D00d, you’re typing ace.mu at us. You’re a moron.

So, of course *every* governor is Commander in Chief of their state’s National Guard. Sort of. During a war or a national emergency, the POTUS can call the national guard up to active duty (changed from last year, when the POTUS was able to do that just for shits ‘n’ giggles, which was a really really weird law).

I got your Palindrome right here:

skcid fo gab gib tae nac nilap haraS

Every picture of her that I see, she’s wearing a different pair of glasses. WTF? Does she collect eyeglasses the way McCain collects houses?

here are six reasons, all of them huge and enduring.

Do tell.

ZOMG Lonny Martello broke my lungs.

This woman has WAY more executive experience than OBAMA DOES–Obama has NONE! And for that matter, NEITHER DOES BIDEN! She’s Commander in Chief of the Alaska National Guard, and her state has a long border with a foreign country–

Why am I reminded of “The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming” all of a sudden?

Six — no, nine enduring, throbbing, uncut reasons.

Wait, what?

Every picture of her that I see, she’s wearing a different pair of glasses. WTF?

She has clearly anticipated that people need a funny photoshop theme for her and she went for young hitmaker Elton John.

PS: This choice really seems to be wigging them the f**k out.

If ‘wigging the fuck out’ means ‘laughing my fucking head off’… well, then I’d have to agree.

Don’t be surprised when the right discovers the word “misogyny” for the next few months only.

Would I be terminally groady if I expressed my desire to see a video of some Cindy McCain-Sarah Palin donut bumping?

It does look like the (vice) presidential requirement of “experience” has now morphed into the requirement of “executive experience”. As I said before, they’ll find some way of making it as convoluted as “weapons of mass destruction-related program activities” and try to claim they’ve been saying the same thing all along.

She’s a creationist. Gotta give her props for that one. She revels in her own stupidity — doesn’t even pretend, like the “intelligent” design crowd does. That’s a woman who knows who she is.

Vavid Ditter said,

You’re not fooling anybody, Grampa McSame. Now put that onion back on your belt and get the fook outta here.

IOKTNHEIYAR.

(It’s OK to not have experience if you are a Republican.)

It’s a wild gamble, undertaken by our oldest ever first-time candidate for president in hopes of changing the board of this election campaign. Maybe it will work. But maybe (and at least as likely) it will reinforce a theme that I’d be pounding home if I were the Obama campaign: that it’s John McCain for all his white hair who represents the risky choice, while it is Barack Obama who offers cautious, steady, predictable governance.

Here’s I fear the worst harm that may be done by this selection. The McCain campaign’s slogan is “country first.” It’s a good slogan, and it aptly describes John McCain, one of the most self-sacrificing, gallant, and honorable men ever to seek the presidency.

But question: If it were your decision, and you were putting your country first, would you put an untested small-town mayor a heartbeat away from the presidency?

That’s David Frum.

here are six reasons, all of them huge and enduring.

Enduring?!?! Try that on some other sucker. I can understand finishing during the bridge, but Hughie doesn’t even last to the first “Can’t Get Enough of Your Love Baby.”

That’s David Frum.

The AEI poultry are taking the non-Lieberman hard, aren’t they?

one of the most self-sacrificing, gallant, and honorable men ever to seek the presidency.

I’m putting an imaginary circle around that along with ‘Prove!’.

AHHHHH! Sarah Palin!!!! She hunts and is like a total NRA gun nut! With Boobies!!! I’m wigging the fuck out!!!!

AHHHHH!!! The pro-lifer is gonna turn all the PUMAs against us, especially with all that complementing Hill’s on her whining skillz!!! Wigging out!

Teh Alaskan beauty queen is gonna eat moose meat! Alaska is really close to Russia! Her experience dealing with Chukotka delegates and officials from the Kamchatka Peninsula is gonna give her massive foreign police props! And the crazy gold miners from teh Yukon! I’ma WIGGING OUT!!!!

Saddling a town of 9000 with almost two million dollars of legal fees for fucking up the land deal for the new sports arena – that’s sound economadoohickey! Wigging Out I am!!!

THREE ELECTORAL VOTES (that weren’t really in play anyways)!!! We can just kiss those good-bye! Wigging Out!

Mudflats also has some amusing reactions by Alaskan politicians to today’s news.

Hey, am I the only one snickering over all those headlines reading, “McCain taps Alaska governor for Vice-President”?

“Five Die Laying Alaska Pipeline!”

But question: If it were your decision, and you were putting your country first, would you put an untested small-town mayor a heartbeat away from the presidency?

Asking awkward questions, eh? Sounds like David Frum has taken his first fateful step on the downhill path to DirtyFuckingHippieLand. Soon he’ll be smoking cheap pot out behind the dumpster, muttering “Whaddafuk’s reality?”

Apparently Sara Palin comes with her own snarky photo. Mighty nice of her.

I gotta know: Are you sure HH reads this site, or do I have to send this to him?

Gosh darn it, Hugh is one funny dude. You know, not counting the future of the country and all.

I’m super happy knowing I don’t have to be a law professor, or even hold a law degree, or even be Sean Hannity to understand that education has nothing to do with intelligence.

Wow, I say. Again, please someone send me Hugh’s contact information, if we’re sure or even doubtful that he comes out here and reads the reaming.

Goober-

Your shit is old. FOAD.

You do have to be careful of those pesky Canadians, you know. For all their politeness and hockey hair and beaver enthusiasm, they are a crafty bunch.

goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:59

You’re only hearing it from your side, bkln.

You are, as always, incorrect, goober. Pat Buchanan, among others, has been screaming it at the top of his lungs since around 4:00 pm today.

She’s a creationist. Gotta give her props for that one. She revels in her own stupidity — doesn’t even pretend, like the “intelligent” design crowd does.

She also sez she’s not had much time to give any thought to the war in Iraq, seeing as how she’s been so busy with the five kids and governing Alaska and all.

The probable nominees all turning it down sounds very plausible – nobody wants to buy a ticket on the HMCS Fail during iceberg season.

I thought Wet-Start couldn’t possibly find someone more pathetic & ridiculous than he is as a running-mate.

Live & learn.

From J’s Alaskan politicians’ reactions link at 4:40, Alaska House Speaker John Harris ( R ) comments on Palin’s qualifications:
“She’s old enough. She’s a U.S. citizen.”

Can you feel the enthusiasm?

Live & learn.

I’m pretty surprised by this too. GHW Bush’s choice of Quayle didn’t surprise me too much back in the old days, because I knew that he’d need somebody who didn’t outshine him. I guess I could have foreseen something like this Palin pick on the same principle, but I’ve figured the Redoublechin Establishment wouldn’t allow anybody who wasn’t one of the big names on the ticket this time around.

Don’t forget about shooting those illegal polar bears trying to sneak over the border from Canada, MzNicky.

From helicopters, of course.

And wolves.

*ahem*

The first McCain-Palin campaign poster is out.

Alaska State Senate President Lyda Green (R): “She’s not prepared to be governor. How can she be prepared to be vice president or president? Look at what she’s done to this state. What would she do to the nation?” (Green is from Palin’s home town of Wasilla.)

Wow, even Republicans in her home state don’t like her. Hmmm…

*ahem*
The first McCain-Palin campaign poster is out.

The first McCain-Palin campaign poster is out.

GHW Bush’s choice of Quayle didn’t surprise me too much back in the old days, because I knew that he’d need somebody who didn’t outshine him.

It sure surprised me, once I figured out what an utter zero Quayle was. It reminded me of what a Houston powerbroker said about an especially inept mayor back in the 1970s: “I like my mayors dumb, but not this dumb.”

As for Palin, the commentary I’m seeing from Alaskan bloggers seems to confirm that she’s widely regarded as a lightweight. I’d love to know the background on this strange decision. I’m assuming that the McCain people had trouble getting their first choices to take the job, became pressed for time, and just fucked up.

would you put an untested small-town mayor a heartbeat away from the presidency?

Well, that depends on the mayor. It depends on the small town.

And it depends on the presidency, of course.

Ham-fisted mayor of Berlin, New Hampshire for vice president of the Coos County Chamber of Commerce?

Yeah, sure, why not?

Penurious mayor of New Braunfels, Texas for vice president of the World Bank?

I’d need to sleep on that one.

Formerly curvaceous mayor of Wasilla, Alaska for vice president of the United States?

I really want some of whatever John McCain was smoking last night.

Palin in her Anchorage office, with dead bear.

[…] 8: How am I to keep up? Sadly, No! points out the wondrous and spectacular intellectual consistency of the right-wing blowha…, who it is alleged has a law degree. Meaning he’s a “smart” wingnut. Possibly […]

Ha ha ha. Nice try Lie-bruls. What about Alaska’s THREE ELECTORAL VOTES (that were extremely likely Republican already)? You got a snippy come back for that one? Absolutely wigging out – that’s what you DFH’s are.

Well Commie Atheist, it is obvious that Lyda Green is a big nasty woman-hating … Um. Well she’s a Democra- Er.

She hates guns! That’s it! See, it says so on her official website:

Life Member – National Rifle Assocation [sic].

Well. She’s old so who cares what she thinks?

Not that I have anything against old people. Just old women.

Who disagree with John McPOW.

Yeah.

Clearly, Republicans like making bold decisions. They also like making bold decisions that are a surprise to everybody. Bold and surprising.

But I think there is a danger, in light of how the Bush administration has operated like a fighter jet at full throttle with the drunken pilot slumped over the controls, that Bold and Surprising will at this point actually read like authoritarian, bullying, out of touch, I make the decisions around here, paternalistic, don’t tell me what to do, I know what’s best, look at me look at me look at me pronouncements. And at this point America has finally caught up to the rest of the world in that we are all really tired of that shit. After the DNC’s brilliant “you are a necessary part of the process, we can’t do it without you” hope and change message is McCain’s message really going to be “Prepare yourself! You have no idea what I’m going to do next!”

nobody reads my blog, so I’m going to put this here…

Heard Ms. Palin on the radio tonight, heading to the store, and took but a second to realize that she was worth her weight in gold for the coming debates and election for one reason and one reason only.

She sounds exactly like Grace, Ed Rooney’s secretary, from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

Somebody keep Tina Fey from voting, because if this ticket makes it all the way to the whitehouse, she’s got at least three, four Saturday Night Live appearances a year for the next four all wrapped up.

What about Alaska’s THREE ELECTORAL VOTES…

Oh yeah? Well, we’ve got Delaware sewed up!

I’ve been giving it some thought – and while it is imperative that POW-y McBombs-a-lot must be kept as far away from the White House as possible, I think I don’t have a problem with Trooper-Gate. Should the state’s govenor be interfereing with personnel issues of the local police? Generallu I would say no – but this Mike Wooten guy is a real piece of work.
http://www.adn.com/politics/story/476430.html

Troopers eventually investigated 13 issues and found four in which Wooten violated policy or broke the law or both:
• Wooten used a Taser on his stepson (aged 11).
• He illegally shot a moose.
• He drank beer in his patrol car on one occasion.
• He told others his father-in-law would “eat a f’ing lead bullet” if he helped his daughter get an attorney for the divorce.

And he got five days suspension – and I believe is back on the force, with his badge and gun.

Beautifully done, SN.

Wouldn’t being the Commander in Chief of the Alaska National Guard kind of be like being the Fire Chief of the Bedrock Volunteer Fire Department?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flintstones#Overview

At first I thought, “if Biden can make it through the debates without a condescending sigh or a “yeeeaargh!” this sucker is a done deal.” And then I saw the lineup photo at the event with Palin holding her infant, the youngest of five, and thought, ‘holy crap, how is Biden going to beat up on a breastfeeding mother without looking like a monster?” Welll played, McCain. Well played.

Palin in her Anchorage office, with dead bear.

Hey, you forgot to mention the crab on the coffee table.

That’s a motherfucking King Crab. The deadliest catch.

But the photo does provide fodder for some bad three-way/bestiality jokes.

Not that I would make any, or suggest that others do so.

But John McCain just might…

…and when she woke up she murmured, “What was the name of that marvelous crab?”

So, “Experience” is a dog whistle for “White” ?

I’m just catching up, is it possible that McCain is using the Chewbacca Defense?

Obviously she and her husband TOBY are corrupt, compromised, lightweight crooks. But is she breastfeeding? And when is it OK to run down the symbolic value of breastfeeders?

Hey, am I the only one snickering over all those headlines reading, “McCain taps Alaska governor for Vice-President”?

Sadly, No!

Dear Partner chortled over it all evening. Especially after I pointed out that McCain was checking out the new Veep’s accouterments during her speech. Realized he was doing it on national TV, stopped… and then couldn’t resist doing it again.

I foresee a lot of late nights at the office, working on the campaign. He has to discuss policy with his new running mate, after all. They need to work very closely together, hammering out the details of their administration’s sexual education guidelines.

Cindy was wearing her hair down and staring daggers at Miss Mooseburger. We just might see some washed-up-rodeo-queen-pill-freak-fake-only-child smackdown action here!

Rightwingsnarkle:
Palin in her Anchorage office, with dead bear.
Hey, you forgot to mention the crab …

Wait, she’s got crabs? Who’s doing the vetting on this?

Well, if things keep going the way they are, it’s conceivable we’ll see the first President with Down’s Syndrome.

Superduper scenario #1
[Rove’s telephone rings]
Karl Rove: Hello?
Sarah Palin: Hello Mr Rove? You told me, in February, to call you if circumstances changed.
Rove: Palin? Palin? Aren’t you the governor of…Litchenstein?
Sarah: Alaska. I’m the governor of Alaska. Your group made a pro forma tour of the world asking republican drones if they were interested in being veepee.
Rove: Oh, okay. Well, we’ve already made a decision and its not you.
Sarah: Oh, okay. I was just calling to tell you to stop considering me, if you were considering me, because I just found out I’m pregnant for the sixth time.
Rove: Wha..? You have five kids already and my staff let you get pregnant again?
Sarah: Its not their fault. My husband is unaffiliated.
Rove: Aren’t you the republican governor with big boobs?
Sarah: Only republicans say that to my face, but yes. Arnold has some impressive pecs, but I still outmeasure him, cupwise. Anyway, I have to withdraw my name from consideration because I’m pregnant and my baby can’t tolerate a long campaign. My last was a less-abled child, and I want to do my utmost to have this one as healthy as she can be.
Rove: Does anyone else know you’re pregnant?
Sarah: No, I called you first….
[fade out]
[fade in]
Sarah: …and so it is with deep regret that I withdraw my name in nomination for The Republican Candidate for the Vice President of the United States, in order to care for my child, in hopes that it not become a Full Retard, yet still cognizant of four Supreme Court Justices yet to be replaced. Although too late to be confirmed at a full convention of Republicans, I’m sure that [name to inserted later] will be approved by acclamation of old rich white men. In the meantime, I’ll return to Alaska where emergency appropriations for Alaskan citizens payouts will insure my reelection for many years to come.
[end]

McCain does like the Beauty Queens, doesn’t he? Maybe he should have picked Miss America?

Fozzetti raises an excellent point. Someone needs to find out the legality of being both Vice President AND First Lady at the same time. Cindy may want to contact whatever Wife x.1 Alpha-Build’s name was, and find out how the divorce process usually goes.

Goober, you are absolutely correct! Two years as a queen of Alaska has been more than enough time for Mrs. Palin to show her mettle. You keep telling everyone how full of shit McCain was for making such a big deal of Obama’s scant 8 years.

“Commander and Chief of the Alaska National Guard”??
Oh fuck is that funny!

I’d love to know the background on this strange decision. I’m assuming that the McCain people had trouble getting their first choices to take the job, became pressed for time, and just fucked up.

Nah, the Permanent Republican Party has just officially announced that they plan to spend the next four years in the peanut gallery, doing their mighty best to obstruct President Obama’s efforts to clean up the mess they’ve left him (us). Mrs. Family-Values has a newborn whose best chances of growing up a functional member of society depend on the kind of one-on-one care he gets during the next five years. If we’re going to give Palin credit for her professed beliefs (yes, she’s a Republican, but bear with me), there’s no fvcking way she can dump young Trig with a team of nannies for the next four years. On the other hand, she can spend the next eight weeks acting the pert, smiling Talibangelical backdrop to Old Lame John, especially if she’s got a fat Wingnut Welfare guarantee to backstop the family fortunes when she goes back to her part-time-legislature federal-welfare day job. And her “sacrifice” preserves the unsoiled electability of all the Real, Serious (male) Rethug candidates for 2012 (cf the Empire Strikes Back).

[…] UPDATE II: Courtesy of Principal Blackman in SN’s comments: […]

What?!! She’s a creationist??? No way, man!

A professing Christian who believes the Bible???

SCANDALOUS, I SAY!

If we acrostic “goober” we get “booger.”

goober,
Normally I don’t have a problem with poking fun at someone’s religion, because I’m a bit of a dick. This case is no exception. Particularly because, as a major government figure, she has significant influence on education policy.
http://scienceblogs.com/afarensis/2006/10/27/intelligent_design_and_the_ala/

Palin was answering a question from the moderator near the conclusion of Wednesday night’s televised debate on KAKM Channel 7 when she said, ‘Teach both. You know, don’t be afraid of information. Healthy debate is so important, and it’s so valuable in our schools. I am a proponent of teaching both.’

If you don’t understand why that’s a problem… well I guess I wouldn’t be surprised considering your display of intelligence so far.

…said the Obama supporter. *snicker*

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Sarah Palin: the first genuinely sarcastic Vice-Presidential choice in American history.

…the Permanent Republican Party has just officially announced that they plan to spend the next four years in the peanut gallery…

I can’t see that. The wingnuts would never willingly give up being in power. I believe they understand that once they’re tossed out they might never get back in. Nor can I see McCain throwing the election for the good of the Republican Party – I haven’t seen any evidence that he gives any more of a shit about his party than Bush does.

No, I think the choice of Palin was a simple, old-fashioned fuck-up

Palin has made no move to see that Creationism is taught in schools (unlike Jindal).

But, like all good proggs it’s the intentions that matter to you, not results.

One more time, with feeling: PALIN HAS MADE NO MOVE WHATSOEVER TO SEE THAT CREATIONISM IS PART OF ALASKA SCHOOL CURRICULUM.

She merely expressed her personal belief.

If you can’t tell the difference, perhaps YOU are the one whos intelligence should be questioned.

Uhh goober… she’s only been governor for what? Less than two years?

Just imagine the wingnut outcry if she was an atheist and suggested that she personally believed that kids should be taught that “there is no scientific evidence of God.”

“Palin has made no move to see that Creationism is taught in schools (unlike Jindal).

But, like all good proggs it’s the intentions that matter to you, not results.”

The fact is, she should have.

And I hope that when McCain wins, she can concentrate on returning our institutions, corrupted by liberal bias influence, back to to freedom and Bible based values of the Heartland.

Gee, booger.

You’re saying that if results mattered to us, we’d all be voting for 4 more years of bush?

Damn you wingnuts are stupid.

PALIN HAS MADE NO MOVE WHATSOEVER TO SEE THAT CREATIONISM IS PART OF ALASKA SCHOOL CURRICULUM.

Great choice: someone who professes the kook position but doesn’t really give a shit. See David Kuo on ways to lose the Republican base.

Palin will make an awesome vice president, as she stands to take the oath of office while breastfeeding her Down syndrome son with one hand and putting her other hand on the awesomest book ever, the Bible, which as we in the Heartland, which totally excludes Illinois, know, tells us in no uncertain terms that Jesus rode dinosaurs and therefore she, the hottest breastfeeding VP ever in the history of the world, will be free to institute the result of her intention, which is that no child be left behind in knowing the Word of the Lord instead of all that scienc-y stuff, which is just theory anyway and not real facts like the Bible, which tells me so.

So, I wonder which is a better qualification for being Vice President:

Commander in Chief of the Alaska National Guard

or

Colonel-in-Chief of the Norwegian King’s Guard.

Cos I’m betting the only sizeable difference is the amount of clothes each role requires.

Also, if the Right are going on about meaningful experience, i.e. ‘Executive Experience’ being akin to job roll of a state Governor, just how much ‘Experience’ does John McCain have?

If you can’t tell the difference, perhaps YOU are the one whos intelligence should be questioned.

Be sure to use your spell-checker on any sentence that questions someone else’s intelligence.

I notice that this goober/booger troll keeps getting easily smacked down but keeps coming back for more punishment.

Has anyone ever done a study on political masochism?

Mr. Zeebra: Listen here, buster, John McInsane did executive duty in the Hanoi Hilton for five and a half years, probably before you were even born since he’s about 85 years old, and that’s all the “experience” anyone needs to be president, so stick that in your hippie crack pipe and smoke it.

I would pay 5 bucks to go back in time (in a time machine) and be in the room when Joe Lieberman found out he was being passed over – for Mandy Mooseburgers. I wonder if Holy Joe is now reconsidering his horse in this race.

Colonel-In-Chief Sir Nils Olav!

Eight tons of awesome…hanx Suicidal Zebra.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Sarah Palin: the first genuinely sarcastic Vice-Presidential choice in American history.”

What, have we already forgotten Spiro T. Agnew? And Dan “Mr. Potatoehead” Quayle? For shame!

Not to mention Dick “Halliburton” Cheney. Where’s teh love, people?

Scrambled Crocodile with Stuffed Spun curd Cheeseses

Ingredients:
1 pound crocodile, bootlessly shredded
1 pound naked spun curd cheeses, peevedly baked
4 cans stupid soybean, salted
6 bunches springbok liver, grated
7 tablespoons baking soda
2 pinches soy sauce

Pre-heat your oven to 440 Farenheit. Tamely grease a cookie sheet. Separate crocodile eye from foot. Consume foot. Use a food processor to mash the soybean with the spun curd cheeses. Stuff the resulting concoction into the crocodile. Shred – very self-pityingly – the springbok liver, baking soda, and the soy sauce. Pound everything together enviably. Do not bake for hours. Instead, scramble as if your femininity depended on it. Serves friends with tan stomachs.

FYWP.

How is Hugetits still relevant?

Eight tons of awesome…hanx Suicidal Zebra.

Seconded! That picture of Sir Nils inspecting the troops is priceless.

I’m so sad that I didn’t get a chance to pick the booger when it was timely.

booger, when your defense of a person comes down to – but she didn’t act on her convictions – well, that’s just kinda sad.

Is Palin dumb as a bag of rocks? maybe. Dangerous to the education of children – well according to booger – definitely not since she wasn’t able to implement “teaching the controversy”. Hey, that sounds like a great reason to have her a heartbeat away from the Presidency.

People with bumper stickers trumpeting their prejudice and ignorance to the world are thoughtfully warning us not to take stock in anything they say. In written columns, this vital function is performed by the artful use of the initials “BDS.” Once you see those three letters, presented that way, you know there’s no reason to believe anything else that writer says, and you can use the free time to eat flan or look for funny typos in the newspaper.