Obama grew UP in Hawaii, for Christ’s sweet sake. The state in which you went to school and where your grandmother lives isn’t exotic for, you know, YOU.

That looks oddly like a burned-out Frank Lloyd Wright house.

Elitist.

If Obama had gone to Billy Joe’s Mini-Golf in East Bumfuck he’d be “pandering” and “inauthentic”. You can’t win with these people. they had two narratives ready to go, just like if Obama meets with the troops he’s “using soldiers as campaign props” and if he doesn’t he’s “spurning the troops”.

If Obama had gone to Billy Joe’s Mini-Golf in East Bumfuck he’d be “pandering” and “inauthentic”. You can’t win with these people. they had two narratives ready to go, just like if Obama meets with the troops he’s “using soldiers as campaign props” and if he doesn’t he’s “spurning the troops”.

For past precedent, see the Supreme Court’s 1978 ruling on Rubber v. Glue.

I disagree with this article. Real Americans should vacation in as expensive a place as possible, so that we can show off our lavish lifestyles to uppity foreigners. Of course, Obama, being a Communist Muslim, needs to stay in the Heartland before we can allow him to leave our sights.

Crawford, Texas, anyone?

I disagree with this article. Real Americans should vacation in as expensive a place as possible, so that we can show off our lavish lifestyles to uppity foreigners.

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! That’s what rich Republicans do in secret! But you can’t show that to the folks back home!

If Obama is elected President with working Congressional majority, he will be the most socialist President ever. If, by some miracle, the voters elect forty or more GOP Senators he will have to be more like Bill Clinton — but then his 2,700 Lefties in government will rule like the Europeans, by means of huge, obscure regulations that nobody understands.

– James Lewis

p.s. No, I don’t know what it means, either. Whaddaya mean I wrote it?

http://www.americanthinker.com/2008/08/march_of_the_obots.html

he will be the most socialist President ever

um… Yay?

Gary Indiana has a song AND and artist named after it! Plus you can do a Jackson 5 pilgrimage.

Stand up for Gary Indiana!

Let me cut off the trolls (and David Greggory) on every single blog everywhere:

Obama should spend all of his vacation time (like President Bush does for the entire fucking month of August) doing thankless, and therefore properly American activities like clearing brush whilst wearing shiny belt buckles and totally heterosexual cowboy boots. For instance, Obama could re-tile his bathroom or clean out the garage like I did on MY vacation! Similarly, when St. McBBQ, married to a beer heiress, travels to one of his 9 homes for some r and r during the weekends, he proves to me that he is not an elitist because he can always be counted on to be wearing denim dungarees and a baseball cap advertising his affinity for an Arizona sporting organization.

On the other hand, when Obama visits his grandmoms in the state in which he was born, he is clearly an elitist. Moreover, when he ascribes fondness for professional sports organizations like “the Bears” and “the Cubs” (whatever they are!) in “Chicago,” he is pandering.

That about it?

I’m far from well-off, but because I’ve saved a decent amount of money and got a sweet deal on plane tickets through my frequent-flying father, my wife and I will be vacationing in (ooh scary) Puerto Rico in a couple of weeks.

Does this make me out of touch with Joe Sixpack McBubba? I’m sure millionaire pundit superstars would say so. Then again, I ride the subway to work, right next to a whole bunch of J.S. McBs. Other week I saw an Obama supporter signing people up to vote. Also saw some volunteers handing out local Democratic candidate literature. I’ve seen vendors hawking homemade Obama shirts outside the train station. Can’t say I’ve seen David Brooks or Willy Kristol or Cokie Roberts or David Broder or Iris or Dickie Cohen or any of their ilk on my trips…but I’m sure they’re connecting to the common man in their own way, probably by dissing Obama in some wine-and-cheese party, surrounded by the loving eyes and quiet chuckles of their sycophants and stenographers.

See, unlike the joyless corporate drones who comprise the GOP’s major donor base, celebrities seem to be enjoying the wealth they’ve accumulated by throwing parties filled with endless supplies of sex and drugs.

Yes, like that noted liberal, Dennis Koslowski…

While I certainly don’t hold it against Obama or any Democrat for going on vacation in Hawaii, I would like to see them try to appeal to peoples’ spite and hatred more

One way he could do it is to say that he spent his entire “vacation” taking care of his enfeeble, senile grandmother*. But then again, the pundits will call him “elitist” for making fun of the elderly.

* Okay, so while I don’t know if his grandmother is senile or not, I do know that she’s enfeebled enough that she can’t be outside the nursing home for extended periods of time.

Also, Obama was born in Hawai’i, and is vacationing there.

George W. Bush is an upper-upper-class Northeastern elite, who pretends to be a Texas dirt farmer while vacationing there.

Of course, we’ve said this a brazillion times, and will say it a quingillion more.

Hey, I’m going for an Applebee’s run. Anyone want something from the salad bar?

The fact is, O’bots are cannon fodder in the culture wars; like a pirate of the Caribbean, Obama pushes one overboard every now and then pour encourager les autres. (Just google it, kids.) They make a satisfying splash as they’re shoved off the plank, and don’t think I don’t appreciate it every time it happens. It’s just that he’s going to appoint 2,700 O’bots in the next US Administration if he wins. For me to feel safe, he’d better start pushing a dozen sixpacks overboard every single day. The Senator tacks with the daily winds and tides. That poses a question: When is Obama lying? Judging by his life story, it all happens on the whim of the moment. In his Audacity book Obama compared himself to a Rorschach blot: “I serve as a blank screen on which people of vastly different political stripes project their own views.” That’s a nice way of saying that he’s a liar who changes his jive depending on who he’s talking to. Then why didn’t the Democrats just stick with Bill and Hillary? The lure of a fresh face? Getting more of the black vote? Reaching out to new generations of Obots? If Obama is elected President with working Congressional majority, he will be the most socialist President ever. If, by some miracle, the voters elect forty or more GOP Senators he will have to be more like Bill Clinton — but then his 2,700 Lefties in government will rule like the Europeans, by means of huge, obscure regulations that nobody understands.

It has the Ruppert name but not the uneducated charm. I give it a 3.0.

…fondness for professional sports organizations like “the Bears” …

umm, not to agree with David Gregory or anything, but it’s “da Bears” and they Suck.

If Obama supports the Bears, I’m defintely voting McCain. Worldwide economic devastation and war is preferable.

“Gary”, you’re not trying hard enough.

Is there any chance at all that Gary is really a skilled practitioner of irony and not merely a moron?

All of Bush’s vacations happen to let him get totally away from people for hours and then return with abrasions on his face. Either prairie dogs do bondage or he’s drinking.

Hey, I’m going on another sex tour of the Domincan Republic for my vacation! Anyone know where I can score some Cialis and Vicodins and maybe some Oxy?

the fact is, you can’t be a Gary clone just by starting with ‘the fact is’

Heartland.

Is there any chance at all that Gary is really a skilled practitioner of irony and not merely a moron?

depends. You talking about the actual First Gary, or the Multitude?

cuz some of them clones is dam funny….

Heartland.

I’m trying to organize a trip to the Northern Marianas for my friends. They want to do some gambling, play some golf and totally abuse some sex slaves in the sweatshop factories we set up there.

Anybody have a line on good fares to Guam?

When you said “The Waltons,” I naturally thought of John-Boy and ’em (salt of the earth, like you said!). When you said they were the richest family in the world, I thought there was some plot twist about gold bars under the kitchen floor that I might have forgotten about. When you said they exploited cheap labor, I thought you meant the 6 kids busting their collective butt to keep the family going. I finally woke up when I read “abroad.” Okay, I go get more coffee now.

This might be the new Gary 2.0 I’ve read about. It says the same inane bullshit, but in a slighly less pig-ignorant manner.

If anyone is looking for a vaction spot, I can recommend various hotels in Southeast Asia. Beautiful women just show up at your door and have sex with you! For Free!

Try not to let your wife find out about it, though.

Divorce lawyers suck.

The fact is, Barack the messiah has fallen from grace. Here he was, a “racial healer,” a hip Hypester straight from Change & Hope, hypnotizing millions of worshippers, a modern William Jennings Bryant dazzling the mobs with the image of an America crucified on a Cross of Gold. Well, recently Obama is just another shifty-eyed, moondancin’ pol from the Chicago Machine, playing the race card like Jesse Jackson, even according to The New Yorker. He makes outright deals with corruptocrat Tony Rezko to get his home cheap, and with the Teamsters to buy their election troops in exchange for Federal oversight leniency. He’s been lolling in bed with the wild-eyed zealots of ACORN for ten years or more. The liberal media are down on him today — but of course they’re counting on the Braindead Vote to forget all about that in November when they lift him up again, just in time for the election. They’re stuck with O’Bumbler, and he knows it.

Maybe Obama X could take the family to Cokie’s hometown. I hear it’s lovely this time of year.

Hmm. Real Gary?

The fact is, it continues to astound me that anyone thinks it might be a good idea to shut Hillary Clinton out of the Democratic National Convention, or to place restrictions on her participation that other second-, third-, and later-place finishers haven’t had to deal with. Particularly given the fact that her candidacy, like Obama’s, was historic, and the fact that the DNC will kick off only a week after the anniversary of the ratification of the 19th Amendment. Michelle Cottle argues that not only should Clinton be allowed to put her name on the ballot so that her delegates — who, let’s remember, she hasn’t released — can feel as if they’re truly part of the process, but that Obama should encourage it. Because right now, it seems like it’s more important to him (and to the Party poobahs like Howard Dean et al.) to present the appearance of party unity at the Convention, rather than to risk reminding anyone that Obama didn’t sweep the primaries and do something to actually achieve party unity.

I take back my wondering. Would Real Gary be able to write William Jennings Bryan or care to?

Oh Christ, should I be happy or sad that I never clicked through to James Lewis?

Could someone tell me when was the last time that Cokie spent her vacation in the Redneck Riviera aka Myrtle Beach?

Or he could vacation in Michigan. There are lots of places here that don’t have to take a back seat to Gary or Youngstown. And we’re a swing state this year! It’s a twofer!

So it isn’t enough to be part of the United States. States must now be graded by their exoticness and how foreign they might appear to some dipshit who isn’t aware we have states with tropical, sub-tropical, mountainous, costal, polar and desert conditions.

Christ, I hope she’s planning to take a trip to the far and distant land of Hawaii real soon.

And I guess we’re supposed to hate Obama because he didn’t drag his granny off the island and stick her in a rest home in Dubuque, IA.

The fact is, when the fuck did the Democratic Party start taking its cues from dictators? Remember when Saddam Hussein or Fidel Castro used to claim that he got 100% of the vote…because he didn’t let anyone else on the ballot? Seems to me, we used to laugh at that shit. Seems to me, the Democratic Party largely supported a war to “spread freedom and democracy” to a country where exactly this kind of ‘show of unity at the expense of actual democracy’ was used as a justification for the invasion. The Democratic Party has officially jumped the shark. And needs to change its name.

That last Gary was channeling Shakespeare’s Sister….

See, I said some of ’em were damn funny. Subtle too.

Gary’s received quite an upgrade.

Too bad Big O can’t be a real Murican and go embarass by getting shitfaced in China like certain other politicians.

umm, I mean the one before the last one.

Gary’s pretty damn quick on the trigger, these days…

Actor 212-

We are simpatico, but you rise earlier.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dennis_Kozlowski

Oh-oh.

Did you know that there are also mosques in Hawai’i?

OT – too subtle?

Cokie repeated this line on NPR today, nice concern trolling.

I am the one who is many.

We are the many who are one.

Join us…

You see, “elitism” in this country isn’t defined by how much money you have, but whether you ever enjoy your life. For instance, you can make a lot of money and not be an elitist if your work is joyless and purposeless.

Or, in other words, John Calvin should be considered one of the Founding Fathers, given the immense influence he’s had on this country’s collective “intelligence”.

Cokie Roberts has spent the last week in the working class summer resort of Martha’s Vineyard where she was photographed attending a PBS fundraiser with Paul McCartney’s ex-Heather Mills and the heiress of Fidelity Investments Abigail Johnson.

If that’s not being a “regular” American, I don’t know what is!

I thought Panama City was the Redneck Riviera…

And Gary, enough about lolling on bed, où sont les bains des langues d’autre fois?

Fucking WordPress ate my sandwich comment.

It was funny, too.

So, in summary:

– There are mosques in Hawai’i (oh no!!11!)

– Is my latest post too subtle?

Thank you.

Stryx: I thought the Redneck Riviera was Pensacola, but it’s true…you’d never find The Beltway Duchess within 1000 miles of either place. Though I’d LIKE to imagine Cokie kicking back, buying a Harley, and entering wet T-shirt contests, you know, I just can’t. Yet.

I love the elitism thing. I use to hate it, but now I’ve learned how to stop worrying and love the 1337 tag.

Just a reminder: Obama- raised by single mom (in Hawaii) = elitist
Cokie Roberts: raised by House Rep Thomas Hale Boggs Sr. who disappeared mysteriously and was replaced by his wife, Lindy Boggs. Lindy also served as U.S. Ambassador to the Vatican. = in touch with the common people.

But, please Cokie, tell us what type of vacation constitutes being elitist.

Blue Buddha solemnly intones

One way he could do it is to say that he spent his entire “vacation” taking care of his enfeeble, senile grandmother*. But then again, the pundits will call him “elitist” for making fun of the elderly.

* Okay, so while I don’t know if his grandmother is senile or not, I do know that she’s enfeebled enough that she can’t be outside the nursing home for extended periods of time.

Ah, is this the same grandmother that Obama compared to Ranting Racist Reverend Wright?* Grandmothers tend to be a forgiving lot; let’s hope Obama’s is particularly so.

Why don’t you S,N! people get back to defending the merits of Hollywood blockbusters mocking retarded people? That seems to be more your speed.

* I know it is received liberal wisdom that Wright isn’t “sticking” to Obama. Ah, November 5 will be a delightful day of liberals wondering just what the hell happened to their Master.

The question needs to be asked: why does Cokie Roberts hate America? Seems to me America has been pretty good to her, and it’s disgraceful for her to badmouth one of our fifty states.

Cokie Roberts owes every American an apology, particularly the Hawaiians whose home she’s insulted.

She deserves to be fired. Out of a cannon. Into the sun.

Oh, look. It’s one of the Schadenfreunde Set, the people who have pinned their entire enjoyment of life on the hope of watching others suffer. How you must enjoy the pain your heroes have created world-wide. The screams must be like music to your ears, and the flow of blood like the pouring of red wine.

Yeah, the grandmother Obama called a typical white person? Wow, there’s s stinging barb. I don’t know if I could ever forgive someone who dared to call me “normal.”

You are correct about one thing, Trollth. Reverend Wright did stick, but only with racist jackasses who’d never vote for a tanned white person, much less an actual negro. You know, McCain’s base.

Hey Da Truth its nice to see you.

“Ah, is this the same grandmother that Obama compared to Ranting Racist Reverend Wright?”

No, Twoofie. Obama ostensibly said he understood how white folks, like his grandmother, had a fearful instinct about black folks when she passed them on the street. Why are you playing the race card?

Which has nothing to with whether or not vacationing in Hawaii is elitist. But thanks for trolling.

Why don’t you S,N! people get back to defending the merits of Hollywood blockbusters mocking retarded people?

I agree. The Ten Commandments was pretty fucking heartless in that regard.

But it was just a movie.

Da Truth, you are so smart!

I am the one who is many.

Join us…

The fact is, Hawaiian getaways may play well in the elitist coastal enclaves, but in the heartland of Bhutan, The Thunder Dragon of the Himalayas, we don’t appreciate that kind of latteluau-sipping snobbery.

Truth, tell us more about how brave you are, please??

If it helps, Pueblo Colorado is quite the armpit too.

Y’know, I don’t understand this “out of touch” crap. What does a guy at a bowling alley or a suburban second grade teacher or the janitor at the hospital know that the president doesn’t know and NEEDS to in order to formulate economic policy?

I mean, how stupid do these people think the candidates are that they can’t figure out who has what, who needs what and where they all are? I mean, here, lemme help you elitists out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EMd9zyJLgA

mikey

As Bubba says so eloquently:

FYWP.

I’ll just do some work now. My comment with the musical link will be out of moderation soon, I trust…

M

Oh look.

There it is now!

mikey

I am the one who is many.

We are the many who are one.

I’d tell ya to be worried about being put in a bunch of swine and driven into the sea, but I’m more worried about being one of the poor swine chosen for that indignity.

Heartland.

Fake Gary’s got The Fact Is and the level of troglodytism down, but never once mentions The Heartland?

Heartland.

The fact is, no mere poseur can ever truly approximate Teh Ruppert.

Heartland.

But to try and pass as Real Gary without any reference to The Heartland…

Heartland.

Truthy! You’ve come back to call us on our BS again! Okay, let’s recap:

Cokie Roberts says that Obama going to Hawaii, where he was raised as a child – and where the people who raised him still live, is elitist. We think that’s retarded.

But wait, The Truth points out that Barry’s Gran-ma-ma is still under the bus! Aiieeee! Horrors! I gnash my teeth and wail at The Truth’s superior “calling out BS” skills! He can call out BS even when there isn’t any!

But on the plus side, I knocked over the Sunsphere. HAW-HAW!

As for Cokie “Red State” Roberts, I think she is benefiting from NPR’s wingnut affirmative action program.

Thing is, the Republicans are just about scared shitless. They see the former Republican base slipping away, whipping out of their control, and they’re going nuts trying to push the buttons, blow the whistles and ring the bells that always worked so well in the past. But it’s not working now. Not at all.

The righties will be ramping it up over the next few months, and like a spoiled brat throwing a kicking and screaming tantrum, the more the grownups ignore them, the more effort they put into it. Unlike the average three year old the wingnuts lack the ability to eventually realize that the tantrum isn’t getting the desired results, so don’t count on them giving over and taking a nappy anytime soon.

Maybe they’ll give themselves a Heartland attack Read it and weep if you’re out there, Real Gary. Read it and weep.

Note to anyone else reading it: Don’t read the comments, or you’ll probably get a migraine, unless you’ve developed Sadly,No! staff-strength resistance. These are titanium density trolls. (Some excellent troll research here. The resulting article appeared Sunday. online venom)

I’m pretty suspicious of Robers’ elitist name. Everyone knows only rich people have those cutsie names that makes them all sound like inbred poodles. What’s wrong with Mary or Caroline or Margaret?

The fact is, vacationing in Hawaii is elitist when Obama does it. You can bet he isn’t ordering enormous watered-down pina-coladas with strawberry jam in them and attending a $49.99 “luau” buffet where he buys his wife a plastic grass skirt and they laugh while trying to pronounce the name of a fish. They’re probably the sort of elitists who enjoy kitsch ironically rather than sincerely, like we Heartlanders do (I only call it “kitsch” so you elitists know what I’m talking about; if you don’t, I mean stuff like those little plastic hula dancers and those hats that they didn’t finish weaving. I also spell “elitist” without fancy foreign letters because regular English letters were good enough for Jesus).

Anyway, real American politicians don’t go to exotic places like Hawaii (note: real Americans don’t put an apostrophe in “Hawaii”; we save it to say things like “I would like three more cheesburger’s”). Real American politicians go yachting with the Sheik of Araby or whoever the hell that guy is, or they go and shoot a bunch of baby birds and a lawyer, or, and this is a good one — they go and do the kind of thing that we might have to do for a living, but they do it for fun and this is not at all condescending but shows that they are like us, because their leisure activity is a “fun” version of hard work. But not like some California latte-sipper growing some damn la-ti-da “heirloom” tomAHtoes that they might actually enjoy.

Basically I’m very disturbed by the notion that somewhere, someone is having a good time. That’s not what this country was founded on when the Puritans came here because they weren’t allowed to be dour enough in the Netherlands, or before that when those other guys went to Virginia to, like, look for gold and eat dead Indians.

I live just south of Myrtle Beach. The Bushes vacation here all the time. Real salt-of-the-earth people. They chow down at the all you can eat seafood buffets and play lots of Jungle Golf.

Cokie Roberts was here last week too. She got drunk and entered the bikini contest at Xanadu Nightlife. She’s a fun gal, really ultra-American, not snooty at all.

In real life, my first name is Joe (well, Joseph really) and I often buy six-packs. Very often, in fact, I choose what kind of six-pack based on how close the brewery is to the store. I use basically the cheapest means of transportation I can to get to my job, which doesn’t pay badly but doesn’t pay a hell of a lot either, and I buy a lot of my food directly from farmers. I bet all of this makes me an élitist, though.

@ 19:39 – Awesome. I’ve just become a Nascar fan.

I call stupidest fake Troof ever.

The fact is, is this the same grandmother that Obama compared to Ranting Racist Reverend Wright?* Grandmothers tend to be a forgiving lot; let’s hope Obama’s is particularly so.

Why don’t you S,N! people get back to defending the merits of Hollywood blockbusters mocking retarded people? That seems to be more your speed.

* I know it is received liberal wisdom that Wright isn’t “sticking” to Obama. Ah, November 5 will be a delightful day of liberals wondering just what the hell happened to their Master.

I’m pretty suspicious of Robers’ elitist name.

That’s her married name.

Her maiden name was Boggs.

Hale was her dad, Lindy was her mom. Both were in congress. She went to Working Class Wellesley College.

Jus’ reg’lar folk.

The real deal is, Cokie is a much better name than “Mary Martha” because that sounds way too Papist for us Heartland folks. And also it’s hard to make fun of, because it already sounds like something you would call a cokehead, because why can’t they use crank like the rest of us decent God-fearing folk and they gotta take some fancy foreign drug?

Also as it is pointed out on wikipedia, the liberal bias version of conservapedia:

Additionally, Cokie Roberts has added insightful criticism on many television shows: For instance, on August 10, 2008 on ABC she brought up the piercing question of why Barack Obama would travel to Hawaii and not Florida. In displaying her geographic prowess, she conceded Hawaii was a state, but wondered how a presidential candidate would travel to such an exotic place and not Florida; of course, it must also be pointed out that Barack Obama was born and raised in Hawaii, and his sister and grandmother still live in that state.

The problem is that East Bumfuck is always booked this time of year. Not even a Senator could could find a room without advance reservations of at least two years.

You know who else isn’t elitist? Ricki Lieberman, of PUMA fame. She’s so hard up she has to rent out her Cape Cod beach home for several weeks each summer. Keepin’ it real !

The real deal is, we also like Cokie Roberts (neigh Boggs) because she is probably related to five-time American League batting champion Wade Boggs, who once drank 64 beer’s on a cross-country flight.

(That’s another apostrophe I saved by writing “Hawaii” the American way).

The fact is, Heartland.

(I just like saying it)

The real truth is, Cokie hates families.

Cokie should vacation in Red-Blooded American Texas, where it’s 98 degrees and hurricane season. We’ll show her a good time by shooting caged animals and free-range lawyers.

I finally watched the Cokie bit (@ TPM) and it’s a beaut. Not only does she get in the crazy foreign and exotic-ness, but she prefaces it with the arrogance fake-out.

Certainly nowhere near closing the deal.

and from Morning Edition:

…although I think he’s feeling somewhat secure…

Yup. Obama – uppity and foreign.

The fact is, Pueblo > Gary. Penis!

The fact is, you liberals.

The fact is, John McCain was addressing the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. His speech was reality-based, far different than the fantasy-celebrity-Islamic B. Hussein Obama base. Reality. It’s becoming increasinly a strange virtue. Yet it is the power behind reality that guarantees its ultimate success with those genuinely seeking truth. Cultures have been easily steared by the unreal. It does not take thought or perception to go that route. When cultures persist in that journey, they disintegrate. Reality means sacrificing one’s own wishes for what is. Reality dictates that self submit to the actual milieu rather than carve out a more convenient travel. Cults are built on fantasies. They wrap into their warp the thoughtless and weak. If reality tries to break through, there is unbelievable resistance for cults are structured on the extreme opposite of reality. There is a B. Hussein cult already formed. It is given to the craze. Its members don’t read, don’t heed. They simply cheer, stomp, cry, fall at their messiah’s feet and clamor for more. B. Hussein is most adept at providing them with the unreal.

Besides, Hawaii is pretty much Japan anyway, so it’s obviously foreign, and Obama’s grandmother has tossed the mainland under the bus by continuing to live there and Obama should have had his grandfather’s grave transferred from the Punchbowl national cemetery to some more American place like Fresno or that place in Pennsylvania where Hillary’s folks went hunting.

Do any of the conservative trolls want to weigh in on Cokie Roberts’ brilliant observations about Hawaii?

Maybe they’d like to comment on the McCain campaign plaigarizing from wikipedia.

Or do they just want to say “Rev. Wright” and “Michelle Obama” over and over again?

Are there conservative trolls here?

Yep, that’s our motel all right.

Can we keep Nascar McHeartland? Please? I promise I’ll feed him.

Union City Tennessee gets my vote.

btw, Shouldn’t someone running for President of the USA be as elite as possible? As in superior, more skilled, etc?

Or what?

The fact is, John McCain was addressing the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally.

That was such a great speech. I’ve never heard more grating old-man yelling. “Tell em to get to work!! Tell em to get back to work!!”

And the pouting motions he does with his arms are a great touch. I think he’s a fantastic orator. That speech in front of the green screen was very JFK.

The fact is, SCARY BLACK MAN!!!!

SCARY BLACK MAN!!!!

SCARYBLACKMAN!!!!

Also elitist secret Muslim arugula under the inflated bus tire is your savior, Libs, and that doesn’t play in Peoria.

Are there conservative trolls here?

I admit, the Golden Age of Conservative Trollery is long past. That their ideology long ago reached the Epic Fail stage is far too obvious for all but the most deluded, and it is clearly sapping their morale and energy.

But I still think it’s nice – a professional courtesy, if you will – to recognize their efforts with the occasional ideological challenge, just in case any real conservatives are still monitoring our treason.

“The fact is, John McCain was addressing the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally.”

Yes. I find the ability to wander into an already assembled group of drunk bikers, couple with the ability to offer one’s wife up for a wet titty contest, to be singularly important skills necessary to be president.

George W. Bush is an upper-upper-class Northeastern elite, who pretends to be a Texas dirt farmer while vacationing there.

Very petite hameau de la reine.

Heh. The truth is, dhimmicrats have allied with the homo-onion rings and the socialist granite countertops to throw Catholic values under the bus because grill-tipping hurricanes are the Schutzstaffel of liberal fascism, libs. Indeed.

The fact is, best troll name evar.

Every Monday morning, while I’m getting ready for work, I hear Cokie piping up on NPR and resist the urge to slap my hands over my ears, mostly because I’d end up dropping my coffee cup. It’s like she’s some little kid who wants to be like the older kids (that is, the Rethug chorus) and find something belittling to say about that weird kid. Or maybe she gets off on the idea of starting a meme, and will end up riding her husband tonight and screaming, “Hawaiigate! Hawaiigate!” at the climactic moment. (I apologize for the mental picture. I’ve always thought that she looked like David Bowie’s character in The Man Who Fell To Earth–trying hard to pass for human, but never quite making it.)

Obama? Now I picture him shooting the curl with the Hawaii 5-0 theme playing in the background. Cowabunga, dude! Or whatever the kids say these days.

It’s not surprising that the state has the “look of a foreign exotic place,” since just over a century ago it was a sovereign Polynesian kingdom. Then a group of white businessmen assumed power in a US supported military coup. Clinton officially apologized in 1993. Read the shocking tale here:

http://www.thenation.com/doc/20080428/langer/single

couple with the ability to offer one’s wife up for a wet titty contest…

Now you just demonstrate your ignorance of honest american culture. What are you, some kind of elitist?

It is not a wet “titty” contest. That would be silly, no to mention obscene.

It’s a wet “t-shirt” contest. The point is not that the breasts in question be wet, but that the shirt covering them become somewhat transparent, thus exposing the breasts to drunken leering.

One almost has to reach the sad conclusion that, being so completely unclear on the concept, you’ve never attended a wet t-shirt event. My good man, do you even OWN a motorcycle? No, not one of those ridiculous crotch-rockets that have the handlebars down by the front axle, and the pegs up near the seat, but a REAL motorcycle…

mikey

“Then a group of white businessmen assumed power in a US supported military coup.”

That group would include the Doles (of pineapple and political fame), actually. The Right Honorable Libby Dole is in the senate now.

Yes, like that noted liberal, Dennis Koslowski… – actor212

But Dennis Koslowski gave money to both Democrats [about $2000] and Republicans [>> $2000], so both sides are equally tainted with corrupt money … but the Dems. are hypocrites because they are a bunch of elitists who pretend to be on the side of the working man while all they care about is the rights of icky people to do icky things whereas the GOP at least stands up for the working man against threats to his culture, which those hoity-toity Dems. don’t appreciate, ’cause they’re all Yurpeanized and stuff. < /GOoPer>

*
Or, in other words, John Calvin should be considered one of the Founding Fathers, given the immense influence he’s had on this country’s collective “intelligence”. – Emperor USA

We need to be careful to avoid a glib understanding of who the Puritans were based only on reading one too many Hawthorne novels depicting the Puritans as mere killjoys.

That being said (a perversion of) Calvinism is the issue here. Why do the GOoPers get a free pass? Why IOKIYAR? Because the Republicans are the “elect”, that’s why. They are saints, therefore everything they do is sainted (c.f. the Paterfoobs as criticized on The Comics Curmudgeon). OTOH, the Democrats are not of the elect, so therefore whatever they do must be the work of the devil.

*

Of course the real issue — why these “elitism” charges stick — is one of class. The GOP has managed to divide and conquer to win the class war. And let us not deny the very real resentments here (which were especially clear during the Vietnam war — hence the continued “anti-hippy” campaigns of the GOP): during the Vietnam war, poor folk had no other choice but to go to ‘Nam, potentially to die whilst the kids of the Bourgeois had the luxury of protest — they could “protest the war” (albeit at a cost the poor could not afford to pay … e.g. having to flee to Canada or get locked up as draft dodgers), have teh hawt sex with hippy babes, etc.

How did this look to the poor who had no choice but to send their sons to war? If you were poor what would you think of that war? You’d support it — ’cause it would be too psychologically damaging to even consider that your kid might die for a stupid, pointless war. Meanwhile the upper classes could have the draft dodged for them and blame everything on “those dirty hippies” and ride the wave of proletarian disgust with the behavior of the “hippies” to office, creating viscious cycles benefiting only the upper crust and engendering more and more spite amongst the proles.

It’s not surprising that the state has the “look of a foreign exotic place,” since just over a century ago it was a sovereign Polynesian kingdom. Then a group of white businessmen assumed power in a US supported military coup. Clinton officially apologized in 1993./i>

We were invited! We were told there would be punch and roast pigs! We did not anything that could be considered the act of ruthless corporate business destroying a majestic island-nation and running it as our own private junta for several decades, and it’s obvious that when we were pushed out by the Democratic Party which actually gave those colored people the vote, and in fact, let them be politicians themselves, it was all the fault of godless communism.

Crap.

“My good man, do you even OWN a motorcycle?”

If you don’t own a Harley or make the average american $200k per annum income (as Gibson said, right?) should you even be allowed to participate in the political process?

And what about soccer moms? Are they too tied up in the burgeoning MILF industry to comment on this election? I want some more security mom pandemonium. Frankly, I’m getting a bit bored of this election. Where are the threats that bearded mooslems will come and rape/honor-kill our women? I’ve come to expect more craziness from our political process.

mikey,

wet t-shirt contests are part of the heathen religion of an increasingly numerous and prominant group of brown people from a country with a huge Muslim population, and hence should be viewed with disdain and fear by proper Judeo-Christians.

Did my post chastizing Mikey for mentioning wet t-shirt contests, which are part of heathen festivals, get swallowed into the bowels of the internets? Dang, “Puritanical” intertubes!

I like this concern trolling that Cokie is doing. I think we should have an extended discussion about what real America is.

Let’s see. The 2000 average center of population is Phelps Co. Missouri. Unfortunately, Phelps Co. is a little light in the income ranking, falling short of the national median income by somewhere around $20k.

Maybe we can find somewhere else that’s Real America.

I guess the intertubes merely decided to delay posting my first comment (I refreshed a few times to see if it would appear … but it didn’t) until after my second comment came through.

Why are the intertubes trying to make me look stupid for pointing out that wet t-shirt contests are an exotic activity done by members of the liberal, cultural, anti-Judeo-Christian elite? Do the intertubes have a left-wing bias because they are ran by liberal bloggers who use a lot of dirty words? After all, the intertubes were developed by an off-shoot of <a href=”http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/US_military”an organization famed for its use of dirty words and even worse, killing people.

Goodie Prudence,

In truth, it took me a while to remember Kozlowski’s name, so you can claim a moral victory.

OK … the intertubes must really hate me today (or maybe I need to learn to use preview) … in any case, I think y’all can figure out the intended content/link in that last post of mine.

DAS,

Kozlowski gave far more to Republicans than to Dems until the 2000 election cycle:

http://www.campaignmoney.com/biography/dennis_kozlowski.asp

http://www.newsmeat.com/ceo_political_donations/Dennis_Kozlowski.php

Are they too tied up in the burgeoning MILF industry to comment on this election?

Yes.

Every Thursday around my place.

Kozlowski gave far more to Republicans than to Dems until the 2000 election cycle – actor212

I know. That was the basis of my snark — the tendancy of certain types (*) to take statistics like these and note that “both parties got support from [Bad Guy]” and act as if there is an equivalence in that support when there is no such equivalence by any stretch of the imagination.

(*e.g. media faux moderate-liberals who really are reactionaries by any other name, but whose snobbery and liberal self-identification is used to convince many people that we liberals are a bunch of elitist snobs)

Ah, OK, DAS, sorry I missed the finer point!

DAS, I’m glad to see you having that dialog with your nemesis, the intert00bz, because I was going to demand to know how come wordpress let you just go ahead and post a comment with a whole BUNCHA links in it.

I was going to have to accuse you of being a terrorist, or at least a muslim or maybe Bill Ayer’s friend. But then it turned out you were another wordpress victim, so I guess you’re ok…

mikey

The 2000 average center of population is Phelps Co. Missouri.

No way, I grew up there! Very salt-of-the-earth, in the Blazing Saddles sense.

When Real Americans go on vacation, they go fishing with Gustavo Cisneros in Los Roques Islands. Just like George H. W. Bush.

The real deal is, for down-home American-style fishin’, you can’t beat a 60-foot yacht owned by an absolute monarch.

okay, where do I sign up for the tying up MILF industry? And the burgeoning, of course.

Heavy on the burgeoning.

I am not sure how much this is a matter of choice… For some reason God/Nature/theDNAlottery – whatever you choose to believe in – has found it it fit to apportion looks/creativity/talent/smarts to one set of people and corporate power/narrowmindness/stupidity/bad taste/ugliness to another set of people. From there, their travel/leisure/entertainment choices organically follow…

offer one’s wife up for a wet titty contest…

Mikey, I think in this particular case, it’s better described as a “wet titty contest” rather than the perfectly wholesome and thoroughly Heartland “wet t-shirt contest”. Cause there were no t-shirts in sight.:

Miss Buffalo Chip contest every night, which is essentially a topless beauty pageant. And occasionally bottomless, too.

(Dang–no footage of the “fake orgasm contest” which came right after the “beauty pageant”.)

Testing…

Here’s to that pundit named Cokie!
A smug, sanctimonious jokey.
“Hawaiian island-hopping!” —
Her bug eyes start popping.
When Rove calls, she says “Okey-dokey!”

They say that Obama’s elitist,
Though he plays b-ball very streetist.
Their protests in vain,
‘Cause of rich McCain.
This man is one they can’t beatist.

There was a young lady named Cokie
Whose Schtick was a little bit hokey
She offers up a Bon Mot
When she just doesn’t know
‘Cause her logic is a little bit smokey

mikey

Cokie lived in the Washington Beltway
She lived it by night and by day
O’s Hawaiian vacation
Got no standing ovation
Cause it’s not the US of A way!

I have a shot when I wake Monday Morn
‘Cause it’s Cokie that appears on the horn
She does her piece on NPR
From her pits full of tar
And I always wish that she hadn’t been born

mikey

Can’t help but wonder if old Cokie is fully aware of all American vacation traditions.

This kind of on-air stupidity is just delicious. Hope she keeps it up!

Dorothy, it’s a shame, really, because I’m sure anyone married to John McCain would have an advantage in that contest.

As a damn foreign type, i wonder if someone can give me an idea where teh heatland starts and ends, a map would be useful?

Susan of Texas sed

Either prairie dogs do bondage or he’s drinking.

I like to think it’s both.

This kind of on-air stupidity is just delicious. Hope she keeps it up! – meatwad

Cokie Roberts could come out on air and genuflect before an idol of Bill Buckley and people will still take her to be a liberal because she’s a lady reporter on the liberal media. It’s the meme that won’t die.

Now … given that whatever Cokie Roberts says or does will be taken by many ‘Murkins (who vote) to be representative of liberalism, do you will want her to keep up this on-air stupidity?

*

As a damn foreign type, i wonder if someone can give me an idea where teh heatland starts and ends, a map would be useful? – lobbey

According to Emerson, “America starts west of the Appalachians” (or something like that. And presumably ends at the Pacific Crest.

So I guess The Heartland (praise be upon it) (TM)(R) lies between the Appalachian trail and the Pacific Crest Trail (of course, I’m betraying my coastal, elitist, dirty hippy sensibilities by using hippy-trails as markers). And it excludes any region known to be full of liberal hippies. Like Boulder, CO … or any big city like Chicago, IL or Fargo, ND.

The Heartland is anywhere were there aren’t Democrats.

It’s a bit like being nations-of-one for those Dems out in the sticks.

DAS — You have a point re Cokie and how’s she perceived to be a liberal by the no-neck monsters. I’m just hoping against hope that the American public at this stage of the game is even more pissed off at the pundits than they are at the rest of the detestable machine.

But, yeah, I hear you. And I was spitting into the wind —

For the rest of it, the Heartland, the Homeland, the Motherland — I hate these terms — My idea of Merican Vacationland is anywhere I get to go to the beach, drink cold cold beer on a porch at night, and plug in Season 2 of Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Hawaii would do.

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