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That is so totally like what the Nazis would do!
Living in Germany, one can see lots of reminders, big and small, of the things Nazis did. Some might argue the concentration camps and their millions of victims stand out. Others might argue that starting a war that saw tens of millions lose their lives was no great feat either.
If you ask Kerry L. Marsala however, she’ll tell you that the worse thing the Nazis ever did was their slightly less well-known scheme of causing potassium imbalances in unsuspecting victims, leading them to suffer a heart attack which in turn caused brain damage due to lack of oxygen, only so they can later be given percutaneous endoscopic gastrostomy (PEG) to provide nutrition and hydration and kept on life support machines for 15 years in a permanent vegetative state, after which the PEG tube is removed according to your wishes (as determined in court proceedings:)
As an innocent life slips away through methods used by those of Nazi Germany, the spinning heads of the media circus continue to flap their lips over the case of Terri Schiavo…and nothing within this mess makes any sense.
Kerry to the rescue! Her punctuation may never make sense, but the arguments are always sound:
Parents who love their children today in the United States have had all their rights stripped from them by a system gone mad.
Fortunately, we don’t have children. And we can promise you that when we do (June 18, 2005) we are going to hate them with a vengeance! Which means our rights are safe — thank God the system works!
I shutter to think of what our future holds, now more than ever.
Leave it to the shuttering classes to be our leading beacons of nabobs of negativism. Sons of bitches!
Terri, Mr. and Mrs. Schindler and family, you’ve moved the masses to action. Terri, you never intended to become such an important figure to the American people, nor to the world, but you’ve left your mark on this planet.
Kerry, the people of the world, they’re not crying with you, they’re crying at you.
Pepper said,
March 31, 2005 at 23:20
My favorite part:
“Terri, I never knew you personally, but without a doubt, part of your memorial needs to include …”
followed by a paragraph of praise not for Terri, but for Terri’s parents and those - like Kerry - who tried to “save” her.
What a way to turn someone’s death (whenever she died is debatable, but still) into a moment of self-righteous self-congratulation. It’s bad manners, too - writing a dead person’s epitaph when you didn’t even know them and then barely mentioning the person in the memorial.
Just more proof that this was never about Terri and all about her whacked-out “saviors.”
scott said,
March 31, 2005 at 23:38
You missed this choice tidbit:
Remember when Lady Liberty used to sing with arms open wide? give us your tired, your poor, your hungry, your down trodden?
Uh, Kerry; I, think. you should try Aripiprazole , it should help with the hallucinations.
Thlayli said,
April 1, 2005 at 0:12
Parents who love their children today in the United States have had all their rights stripped from them by a system gone mad.
What “rights” would those be, concerning parents and their 41-year-old married children? Please, Kerry, enlighten us.
Anonymous said,
April 1, 2005 at 0:30
What “rights” would those be, concerning parents and their 41-year-old married children?
Well, Good Lord, please don’t tell my mom she’s still got rights in my life. She’s controlling enough as it is!
Bill S said,
April 1, 2005 at 1:17
Yet another wingnut who’s “deeply moved”(cough, cough) by the Schiavo case, but didn’t give a crap about Sun Hudson, whose death was only the result of a law GWB passed 7 years ago.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t Kerry once say she believed one of her kids was going to Hell, or have I confused her with another wingnut?
Brad R. said,
April 1, 2005 at 1:18
Prediction: in two weeks, Kerry announces the formation of the Terri Schiavo Martyrs’ Brigade.
Anne said,
April 1, 2005 at 1:29
Yeah, at least one person in the pro-life LJ communities was freaking out, saying that now all the babies, disabled, and elderly in the country are going to be euthanized.
Vladi G said,
April 1, 2005 at 2:09
Yeah, at least one person in the pro-life LJ communities was freaking out, saying that now all the babies, disabled, and elderly in the country are going to be euthanized.
As an adult, able bodied, non-old person, I say SWEET! No more deficit! But does it have to be euthanasia? Can’t we just let Hollywood stuntpersons take a vacation while we use babies, disabled, and old people as extras in John Woo movies, or maybe the next season of 24? The element of realism would be awesome!
Anonymous 'cause of the shame said,
April 1, 2005 at 3:41
As someone living in George W. Bush’s economy, I’d say that my parents have plenty of rights in my life. Mostly cause they help pay my monthly medical insurance bill. If I go PVS, it’s kinda their choice, because all they have to do is stop paying.
jenna said,
April 1, 2005 at 5:55
At least we have the comfort to know that Kerry Marsala is strongly anti-Nazi, and will not stand for it when the mad scientists unfreeze the cryogenically frozen Nazis. She’ll at least write a column denouncing them and their undead rampage. Eating brains of the living, is so, barbaric, she’ll write. The only downside of the Undead Nazi Rampage Column is that Kerry Marsala will have nothing to compare them to.
Soonergrunt said,
April 1, 2005 at 6:24
I wonder if she knows who Sun Hudson was?
VKW said,
April 1, 2005 at 7:14
I shutter to think that anyone reads her column except for yucks.
s.z. said,
April 1, 2005 at 7:36
Seb, I congratulate you and the Mrs. for deciding to have a kid in this brave, new world of Nazi horror described by Kerry.
Hey, you should name the baby Kerry; it works whether you have a girl OR a boy. Kerry No! - I like that sound of that.
Uncle Kvetch said,
April 1, 2005 at 20:46
June 18? That’s my buffday, too! And Paul McCartney’s!
How very auspicious.
I suppose naming the sprog “Kvetch” is out of the question…?
Ken Houghton said,
April 1, 2005 at 20:51
Ah, so that’s why you moved to Germany…
I “shutter” too, but usually with a camera.
The mark they have left is that more and more people are making certain their living wills are executed so that parents such as the Shindlers cannot make a mockery of them.
Frederick said,
April 1, 2005 at 23:44
You’re having a baby?! Wow, you have a curious way of announcing these things. Congratulations! I trust its first and middle names will be “Amber Pawlik” if it’s a girl and “Brian Cherry” if it’s a boy.
Jeff said,
April 2, 2005 at 0:17
Are you sure that wasn’t an early April Fool’s column?
Frederick said,
April 2, 2005 at 2:40
I did consider that possibility, Jeff. The rest of the post doesn’t seem April Foolsy (to coin a phrase) and it would violate A.F.D. protocol to publish an April Fool’s Day post on March 31, so I took Seb’s statement as true. Maybe he’ll further enlighten us on the subject.
Bill S said,
April 2, 2005 at 3:31
“I wonder if she knows who Sun Hudson was?”
Based upon her analogy, I wonder if she knows who the Nazis were.
heydave said,
April 5, 2005 at 3:29
Way to go Seb!
On the upcoming babyness, not subjecting us to Kerry. and I agree with s.z.; name the kid Kerry! (exclamation point mandatory)
drew said,
April 6, 2005 at 4:51
Good show!
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